Historical Newspapers of South Carolina

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Hobvser JSfebif *Rc [Copyright, 1903. by C. B. Lewis.] MR. BOWS Kit has no regular set programme with his grocer or butcher or coal man, nor has he any set policy with the cobbler who builds up his shoes at intervals or the street peddlers who shout their wares over his front gate. It is only with bis family druggist that he holds to programme and policy. He began it fifteen years ago and is sticking right to it yet. There have been several changes of family druggists, but no change in Mr. Bowser. When the old druggist vacates the corner store and a new one takes his place, Mr. Bowser is on band among the first callers. He isn't there to have a prescription filled cr to invest in a hot water bag, but to give a little friendly advice. A dozen grocers may come and go and he gives them no heed, but with the family druggist the case is different. "My name," begins Mr. Bowser as he enters the store, 'is Bowser. I live "SIR, YOU HAVE A DRUG STOKE HERE." around the corner and half way down the block. Although I have only a small family, I am a liberal patron cf drug stores, and I always pay (rush. You know your business as a druggist, do you?" "I think I do," is the reply as the druggist colors up. "That is well. This is no corner for a druggist who has only half learned his business. You have come into a new neighborhood. "Success or failure will depend upon your personality. Always greet every caller with a smile of welcome. Don't take any part in politics and don't become a fixture at any particular church. Stand neutral between capital and labor and don't have any family rows to cause gossip. I am advising you as a friend who has your interests at heart and therefore speak plainly and to the point. I am in a hurry this morning, but will call again soon and give you further pointers. Menowliile think over and profit by what I have already said." The family druggist is generally a man who sizes up human nature pret "BY THUNDER, BUT I ty closely, and he decides to bear with Mr. Bowser. That's the beginning of it, and the end only comes when the poor man dies or finds seme one to buy him out. Mr. Bowser at once becomes a sort of guardian and partner of that drug store. When he isn't playing guardian and partner he is making himself a nuisance, and one that nothing can abate. The interest he ! exhibits in stock and sales couldn't be - greater if he had $10,000 of his own . * M..1 money mvesieu. "Sir," exclaims Mr. Bowser as he I advances upon The man of drugs and | walks on his toes and shakes a finger i I under his nose, "you have got a drug j store here, but what is a drug store ' without patronage? I am giving you i my countenance and support, and { through me you are getting tiie pat- j ronage of this neighborhood. If you ' want me to withdraw, if you want nie! to take my custom elsewhere"? That settles the family druggist, and he decides that it is better to bear the > ills lie has than to be thrown out of business. lie therefore forces a smiie to his face and replies: "You mustn't take what I said so | seriously. I have depended upon your : friendly interest and advice right along, and I shall continue to do so." ! "Then don't virtually tell me that, this or that is none of my business." "I surely didn't intend to. Try one He Act/ Adviser ^nd Tries His Beyt ng to Help the I sfCorner Drug<?? gist Along; * of the new fifteen cent cigars I got in this morning." Mr. Bowser does not stop at general Interest. His solicitude would be touching if otherwise applied. He has a scrapbook wherein he has pasted up and preserved a score of newspaper : +/-. -f.-1 + ol nn Clippings IV latin i.iiouu?v., the part of druggists. He is early and often on the ground with that scrapbook, and his aim is to keep those fatal mistakes constantly on exhibition and in mind. "Any prescriptions today?" he asks as he saunters in of an evening with a box of troches or a bottle of soda mints in view. "Three or four," replies the druggist. "And you? Are you sure you made no fatal mistake in putting them up? Lord, man, but there isn't a day passes that some druggist doesn't put up morphine for quinine. How can you be sure that you didn't make some terrible mistake?" It's got to be an old story with the druggist, but he never hears it without a chill sliding down his spinal column. He has been in business ten years and made no mistake, and yet Mr. Bowser's way of putting things would give any druggist gooseflesh. "So easy to do it, you know," continues Mr. Bowser with positive enjoyment. "Look at that case In Oshkosh a month ago. There was a druggist who had been in business for twenty years and who bad filled 46,000 prescriptions without a mistake. Then he becomes absent minded for thirty seconds and kills off a college professor. You may think you tilled those prescriptions as straight as a string, but I shouldn't oe a bit surprised if you substituted something somewhere " If Mr. Bowser isn't feeling in real high spirits he will stop right there and give the druggist a chance to get his color back, but if be is he will kindly offer to take a list and run around to the various families and see if the patients are still alive. Mr. Bowser doesn't propose to be laid away in his grave through the stupidity of his family druggist. If he is suspicious for other people he is doubly so for himself. He invests in consumption cure with seeming great confidence that no afterclap will result, but the odds are five to one that at midnight he will rout the druggist out of his first sleep and hold that bottle under his nose and say: "I took a dose according to directions. and I'll be hanged if I don't think there's some mistake about it Are you positive that nothing foreign could have got into the bottle?" Mr. Bowser will buy 5 cents' worth of bicarbonate of soda to take home and dissolve for his heartburn, and the druggist has no feeling of fear as he watches him go. It may be one hour or two before the patient comes burst: ing into the store, bareheaded and his eyes bulging out, to-exclaim: "By thunder, but I'm feeling queer! I saw you put up that bicarbonate and was sure there was no mistake about It, but it seems to affect me in a strange mux?i ' ' .1 ih ,tn. titfft 'M FEELING QUEER!" way. Could you have mixed anything deaf'y with it as we were watching the ambulance go by? If you have made a mistake after- all I have cautioned you it will be mighty costly for you. I won't let up till I have your last dollar!" One or two of the druggists who have done business in Mr. Bowser's neighborhood have lain down and died, while others have sold out and never stopped till they got 100 miles away. It's a good business corner and one likely to be always occupied, but no man of drugs will ever be happy there. Mr. Bowser owns his own house and likes the neighborhood and couldn't be induced to sell out. It is just possible that he may bo run over by a street car or break his neck trying to ride a bicycle, but all the odds are against it. lie has got a good thing, and he knows it. and he is going to keep right on making life miserable for his family druggist until he either dies of old age or the soda fountain explodes some day and blows him across the street in hunks and chunks. M. QUAD. His Experience. "Here's a conundrum for you," said the funny man. "What's the difference between a man and his family?" "It's invariably a difference of opinion." replied Ilenpeck. ? Philadelphia Ledger. THE SIMM'S CHEST Is well expanded. He uses his lungs to their fullest capacity. People in ordinary do not use much over half their lung power. The unused lung surface becomes inert, and offers a prepared ground for the attack of the germs of consumption. There is no need to warn people PHMiB of the danger of feSS consumption, but warning is con|pfi stantly needed not to neglect the first hH symptoms of di&Dr. Pierce's pohlfra fiml a'fatal termi||| nation in con sump ing seemed to help :ne till I commenced using Dr. Pierce's Golden Medical Discovery. After using ten bottles and four vials of his ' Pleasant Pel'.its.' I commenced to improve. My case seemed to be almost a hopeless one. Doctor* pronounced it ulcer of the lungs. I was sick nearly two years?part of the time bedfast "Was given up to die dv all. I thought it would be impossible for me to live over night at one time. I naven't spit any blood now for more than twelve months, and worked on the farm all lost summer. It waa Dr. Pierce's medicines that cured me." f. Accept no substitute for * Goklen Medical Discovery." There is nothing "just as good" for diseases of tJie stomach. The "Medical Adviser," in paper covers, is sent free on receipt of 21 one-cent stamps to pay for mailing only. Addre* Dr. x. V. Pierce, Buffalo, N. Y. Always Posted. Wolfe?I suppose you keep a watch on the stock quotations to see which are going up and which are coming down? Lambe?No; I don't have to. The ones I have always go down, and the ones I don't have invariably go up.?Boston Transcript Straight Up. "Jiminy! Didn't it make you feel like 30' cents when the footpads stopped you?" "Well, I guess. And I must have looked like 12 o'clock." "How do you mean?" "Hands up."?Philadelphia Press. One or the Other. "Gee whiz." exclaimed the nervy caller, "I haven't another match, and my cigaratte has gone out." "Well," replied the polite young woman who could stand it no longer, "you would have had to if it hadn't."?Catholic Standard and Times. Nice and Enconrajflns. "Would you marry a Chinaman?" he asked. "Oh, dear." the girl who is sarcastic replied, "this is so sudden! But I always supposed you merely looked like one."?Chicago Record-Herald. Those Girls. Kell?Yes, we're engaged, but I took my time about accepting him. Belle?Indeed? Waited until he actually proposed, did you? ? Philadelphia Public Ledger. Servants. First Housewife?Some days I undo about everything the servant does Second Housewife?Gracious!- How do you dare??Detroit Free Press. Septemhnh. On the Chesapeake, remember. Where the bivalve has his cloister, There the R that's in September Is as silent as the oyster. ?Chicago Tribune. Cause of Lockjaw. Lockjaw, or tetanus, is caused by a bacillus or germ which exists plentifully in street dirt. It is inactive so long as exposed to the air, but when carried beneatn the skin as in the wounda caused by percuasion caps or by rusty nails, and when the air is excluded the germ is roused to activity and produces the most virulent poison known These germs mav be destroyed and all danger of lockjaw avoided by applying Chamberlain's Pain Balm freelv as soon as the injury is received. Pain Balm is an antisep'ic and causes cuts, bruises and like injuries to heal without maturation and in 0De third the time reqa r d by the umal treatment. It is for sale bv The Kaufmann Drug Co. Reaasarlng. ' c <sr I "Don't be seared, Mr. Itird. I ain't goin* to shoot you. I only shoot lions an' tigers an' things like that.**?Philadelphia Lodger. A KemSnder. Ethei Summergirl?And won't you forget me alter you get back to New York? C'liolly IVnshover?Not readily. I've drawn iny salary two months in adranee, and I won't be liable to forget where it went to.--Judge. TALES THAT DADDY TELLS. When night gits round an' supper's ate, Dad lights his pipe for smoktn' An' gits th' newspaper an' sez To me. a kinder jokJn', "Now, Bul>, I'll take yer wool off 'less You hurry up those slippers." (He knows he couldn't 'cause it's took A'ready with th' clippers.) An' then he sets an' smokes an' reads. An' mother sets a-sewin' A-makin' clo'es for sister?s'prise You how that kid is growin'! An" I jes' sorter wait aroun". A-hopin' dad's most through it. 'Cause then he'll tell me 'bout th' tale 'T's got a giant to it. "They ain't no news but polytiks," Bimeby dad s?-z, a-yawnin", "An' John Smith's paintin' of his fence, An" Green's put up an awnin'." So then I climb up on his knee. An' he sez. "You young urchin." An' rubs his whiskers 'gainst my face An' thinks I need a bircliin*. "But. waal," ho sez. "onct on a tim$ Was Jack th' Giant Killer"? An' tells about th' dredfllest things, 'T jes' plumb skeer a fellow. An' how Jack sworded off their heads, An' all th' blood 'twas makin', An', Jim'nv Gee. when bedtime comes, I sneak upstairs Jes' shakin'! ?Truman Robert Andrews In Leslie's Monthly. Oil the Defensive. Doctor?Your case is so complicated that I think I ought, to call a couple of other physicians in consultation. Patient?Indeed? In that case, doctor, I think I ought to have my attor ney present to represent my interests. A Cure for Dyspepsia. I had Dyspepsia in its worst form and felt miserable most all the time. Did nnt, enjoy eafciDg until after I used Kodol Dyepepeia Cure which has completely cured me.?Mrs. W. W. Saylor, Hilliard, Pa. No appetite, loss cf "strength, nervousness, headache, constipation, bad breath, sour rieiDgs, indigestion, dyspepsia and all stomach troubles are quickly cured by the use of Kodol. Kodol represents the natural juices "of digestion combined with the greatest known toDic and reconstructive properties. It cleanses, purifies and nweetens the stomach. Sold by all druggists. A Tlarht Fit. An Englishman entered a tailor shop In Twenty-third street the other day and, throwing a package on the counter, said: "These trousers are a beastly fit. You'll have to fix 'em. They're tighter than my skin, don't you know." "But that's impossible! How could they be?" demurred the tailor. "Well. I can sit down in ray skin, but I cawn't sit down when in those blooming breeches!" was the wrathful answer.?New York Press. Didn't Worry Her. "Doesn't it make you angry when folks twit yon about your failure to acquire a husband?" asked the girl who was doiusr her first season. "Not me," replied the philosophical spinster. "It is better to be laughed at because you are not married than not to be able to laugh because you are."?Brooklyn Eagle. BnsineH*. I "I see you have chicken for dinner." "Yessuli," said Mr. Erastus Pinkley. "I hope you bought the chicken." "Well, no; but de transaction were strictly regular. Dat chicken has been roostin' 011 my fence foh months wifout payin' mi fill),' an' I reckoned it were 'bout time to fohclose."?Wash* Ington Star. Anxlotm to Anal*t. Doctor?It may be, madam, that there Is something wrong with your vocal cords. I willHusband of Mrs. Yick-Senn (hastily interrupting)?You will find nothing the matter there, doctor. I ain almost sure the trouble is with her liver.?Chicago Tribune. Serloas, Indeed. "Miss Summergal must be quite seriously ill. She hasn't any appetite at all." "Oh. a girl isn't always ill when she has 110 appetite!" I "But she lias no appetite even for ice cream and candy."?Philadelphia Press. For Over Sisty Years. vrr- 1 1 4 1 !_ . O Mrs. YV1Q810W a ocotning oyrup | has been in use for over sixty years j by millions of mothers for their children while teething, with perfect success. It soothes the child, softens the gums, allays, all pain, cures wind colic, and is the best remedy for 7 * Diarrhoea. It will relieve tne poor j little sufferer immediately. Sold byDruggist in tvery part of the world. Twenty-five cents a bottle. Be sure to ask for Mrs. "Wiuslow's Soothing Syrup," and take no other kind, tf Conscience is the reflector of the liv.r. ITHACA SUNS, PASSER SUNS, GUNS, WINCHESTER REPEATING SHOT GUNS. All kinds of Rifles and Air Guns, Shells loaded with the best black end smokeless Powders. Our $5 Single Earrei Guns, 12 guige are the best out. They are boted for long distance shooting Hunting Coats. Cap?. Leggings, Shell Belts. Powder, Shot. "Wads, Caps, Cutlery, Phonographs ancl Records. Gun and Locksmith. ZfcTOTICE. We give a chance on an $850.00 Automobile with each caoh 50 cents purchase. Ask for them. W, F. STIEGLITZ, PROPRIETOR. I 508 MAIN STREET. COLUMBIA, S. C. ONE CAR LOAD MITCHELL, ONE CAR LOAD VIRGINIA, ONE CAR LOAD THOMHILL WAGONS, just arrived. We can make you , attractive prices. Any size wagon , wanted in stock. Come in and see us when in the city. T. B. MGHTR1 & CO., Columbia, S. C. 83 i I WATCH THIS SPACE 1 I3? FOR YOUR BARGAINS IN ??& ?8 ^ S3 I Fallaad WinterDry Qoods 1 m v > m i M gg NOTIONS, CLOTHING-, S3 S3 ?s 95 SHHOES HATS, ?5 se ss ?? Our Buyer is now in the Northern jjg ?11 YOURS FOR BARGAINS THAT WILL f|I gg SURPISE YOU. gg m gg I THE IV. F. i I Rill K (0. | ; 53 ?9 > gg 103S-1C40 MAIX STREET, gg il COLTT1.TBI A, S. C. Ss IB S3 M gg ?S ? IF YOU WANT ANY J03 PRINTING CONE give us an order. The Dispatch Job Printing Office. t