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SELECT SIFTINGS. rJiseuit formerly meant baked twice. Parsley originally caiuo from Europe. The aluminum timepiece is the latest Parisian fad. There are said to be over 3,000,000 deities in tho Hindoo mythology. Frederiok the Groat left more than ono hundred songs of his own composition. The largost proportion of married people is found in Cleveland aud the smallest in Now Orleans. In 1NS3 the United States produced 103,000 tons of refined copper, nearly one-half the world's yield. An old superstition has it that if a wolf booh ft man beforo tho man sees tho wolf ho will bo struck dumb. A man died at Jacksonville, Fin., a few days ago at tho ago of ninety-six who was the father of ninety children. Tho so-called thaler millionaires in Berlin?a thaler is about soveuty-flvo cents?now numbor 426, against 410 one year ago. White-haired Willio Dempster, of Wilton, Kan., twolvo years old, can wag his ears either ono at a time or both together. While exhibiting this strange peculiarity, ho says the alphabet backward. Ono of the queer delusions of a patient in the Kankakoo (III.) Insane Asylum is that hi* font are made of sardines. As he is harmless lie is permitted to keep them tied up in tin cans filled with oliyo oil. The Custom House receipts in Guatemala amounted during the year 1893 to $4,301,818. The tax on the exportation of coffee produced $1,19(5,807, which gives a total for all resources from the Custom House, exports and imports included, of nearly $5,500,000. The rare instance of tho coining of age of a whole trio of triplets was eelehrate 1 recently at Whitenast, near Ijehiiiington, England. Generally, in case of triplets, tho children die soon after uirth, but occasionally they survive at d reach maturity. One case is oti rec< rd of quadruplets, all of whom , were reared. Edward, the Hlaek Prince, was tho first Iluke of Cornwall, created in 1337. and the title was transmitted in , perpetuity to his heirs nude, by virtue of which the eldest son of the King of England is Duke of Cornwall as soon as born. The present lhiko of Corn- i .._ll *!...?>- i w.i ... i--: ? w nu, vuu i i iiuiu'm ?* fiirrt, urrivti^ 11 nci income of about $300,000 from bis dukedom. I The innrrmpe rate in Enqlnn.1 nn I Wnloti during tli? btsl qmtrtcr of lust year nan lower iLuvu iu aiijr previous , Juke period. I.<I<II<OIII llllll III II t II. One of 1 Ik I.u'||t-sl t-lttn-* evel |Mliiii<*<! I> ms-i by \ Ml<-r* to I.<M?k< lit 111<1<111<nin. Tin- nwrii tip I M-hi 1<111< <1I<I mountain is inaile l<) a? tin line tnilwny. H|h-ii oIn-i r\at ion < nr> ?i< Iiim-iI. mini 1 Ik 1 rip to l/mknul 2,'JttO '? < almvi m-ji let?'l. Is mailo in six niimtto-. .In t 111 t lie mot of t lii- mi line t lie la)'oratory <<( t li? C'ltiil lai one a Mi i'it lni ?'< . islimtiil. 'I lie roof of I III? I luliliiii.* hliow* a - Kli ITS li . I loiiif ami fi rt y fert wkIi (lull r< nils "Mi Klrro'a Wlnr of Ctl I lllll lor M 1 llii n." home of I i.e letter- nl*" twenty feel loinx ami <1111 la- renl trmn tin* rim nlil r iIiIIhk a! the way n|i tin- mountain. Nov! Itor 1 oiin h to |.<'oki ill 1110 nt ni 11 without lin\ 11 K 'W .ne of t'anliil" tlrinly no 1 r< -<<<l on t In- r tin 11 nn y . 'I lie "In.< < nin><< a af< ilii-no- tVinnniit al-n in kc Tti-illoi i'.ltn k |iinui:hi.'iiiui have an iiihim ii IhIhmu tory ?..ni!tiiitiiK mote Hi n one hall ii if ol | floor ?p.w e. ?- | An omit e of put off will eauc>? a ton of ? - j ifrrt. Thru** I'lividr lo the ilo?*. So Hhake-penre miiiI, ami it i* tlir> heat of pond mlvire for tlione sufferlnv with tetter, ringworm, < < / inn. enlt rheum ami other i>arn?iti<' -kin ill-t-,? >? ?. Phytic never rnreil til in and never will. Moat htood me<li<duea are merely ealharlire haven't any I liinit to do with eealcy nklii eruption!*. Telterine I* til* only absolutely euro euro. IlrtliorlMn eell It, 60 * ell la u leix.or by mail on receipt of price by J. T. SlIUPTHINK, Savannah, (la. Taluabi.k deposits of tin have boon dlseov- j re.i in Montana. Karl's Clover Root, tlia groat bloo I purifier, ' rfivca fr<'-hlieK!< ami ele.iriu?*H to the complex- i on (Iml I ur<*H constipation. ?let1*., .'el I Is., $|. Mormons have hoc u rod I ml and money to establish a college at Lamonl, Iowa. Ilall'i t'lilarrh Chi* Is a Constitutional Cum. Price 75o. 8t. P*rn'a Catukdhal, Lou ton, is insured tor (ITt ooo Impure Blood Miinifr'ftts itself In hot wn.ithnr in hlv *. |h n|il<>8. i>??||h in ! other <Tti|>:loi?H which <II?H suretho fneo itinloniMM Kr? it nnnoynn*'**. Tin* euro Is lounl in llooii'a HitrmpnriUii w ilch Hood '? Sarsa%%%%%% parilla mokes th'? Mno<l |>nr? f V g g nnit removes nil mich M | <1lnOKurnlhin?. It nliKi KIvcb slr?n:,lh, <T?>nti * in nf|>. til * .tnl tnv'x *rnl"M Ihn wlio'n syntcrn. t; .| ||oo l?. Hood's Pills ?rc |>mnt|>l nn-l ? fits- cnl. W. L. Douglas $3 SHOE NO SOukAH*NQ. #5. CORDOVAN, rWHCM&ENAMEUEOCAir. H \H>3\?FiHECAlf&HmM mm. _J& $3.*9 POLICE,3 Sous. //Ski $2.lI.^Bcn^ScHOOtSH!)ti m?r LAUita edflfll "T ^^^^stNormcATAi.oGue ^MBPW'L-DOUaLAS, BROCKTON, MASS. Yob run mrr money by wrurlnt (he ( W, I,. Donflne 93.OO Ahoc. llrmiKp, w? nrn (ho laryrat mnnurti'lnma r>l l thta grade of alior* In the world, and guarantee lloli value by atumplmt Iho mm? and prlre on tho txdtoin, whloh pmtert you ngalnat high prk-ca and (ho middleman* profit*. Our aboe* equal I'lulon work In (trio. e??y flttint and wearing qualities. (T* have them add every where a( lower prlreafnt Iho value tlven than any other mukn. Take no aub tttute. II your dealer cannot eupply you. we < au. - ft^TUt PROGRESS ?atA SELF-TRAMPIKG \k^BBr#COTTON PR CSS. XVICYvBH/I W I""'' ?U?aj. dareklr A \%OlSr ill rrllaklr. X*?v? (ramping la VwCJpjfci Wf >'.?. benr* only one man to tHrPS Ji t*>ired elth t'reae. Parker r.at vKfjl vMyf'-nit to rat** handle leStarl and ^npSMlxllKV hlnek la anlom illralty - ^ lopped A Ian *ole M 't'r'a of fba e aieel lined Ideal Hay t'rraa. frafrtw nih. f ** *. MerlaMoH. ItlM REV. DR. T.VI MAGE The Brooklyn Divine's Sunday Sermon. . T"T: ?"T'?en w?8 mouth filled with IHUKllter. ?pMlm n*?.l o ?n?- . * a. no inn Sir* teth in the heavens shall laugh."?Psalm .1., 4. Thirty-eight times does the Bible make referenee to this configuration ot the features and quick expulsion of breath which we call laughter. Sometimes it Is born ol the sunshine and sotmdlmos the midnight. Sometimes It stirs the sympathy of nhgolS and sometimes tho cachlbnatton Of devils. All healthy people InUgh. Whothor It pleases the Lord or dlspleasos Him, that depends upon when we laugh ami at what we laugh. My theme to-day is the laughter of the Bible? namely, Snrah's laugh, or that ot skepticism ; David's Inugh, or ttint of spiritual exultation ; tho fool's Inugh, or that of sinful merriment ; Clod's laugh, or that of In Unite condemnation ; heaven's Inugh, or that of eternal triumph. Scene, an oriental tent. Tho occupants, old Abraham and Sarah, perhaps wrinkled and decrepit. Their throe quests nro three angels, tho Lord Almighty one of them. In ret tiru for the hospitality shown by the old people Clod promises Sarah thnt she shall become the ancestress of tho Lor I Jesus Christ. Sarah laughs In tho face of Clod, Sh?- does not believe It. Shols affrighted at what she has done. She denies If. She says, "t did nol laugh." Then God retorted with nn emphasis that silenced all disputation, "But thou didst laugh." My friends, the laugh of skepticism In all ages Is only the echo'of Sarah's laughter. God snvs He will accomplish a thing, and men say It cannot he done * .. mmiiihup inugn at the mlrach 8. Thoy siy they aro contrary to the laws of nature. What la a Inw of nature? It Is Go I's way of doing a thlnir. You ordinnrlly cross a rlfst at one ferry. To-morrow you change for one ilny, nnd you go across another ferry. You made tho rule, llavc you not the right to ohnnge it? You ordinarily come In at that iloor of tho church. Suppose that next Sabbath you come In at th? other door. It la a liahlt you have. Have you not a right lo change your habit? A law of nature Is God's habit? His way of doing things. If He makes the law. has He not a right to change it at any time lie wants t<> oh Align it? Alas ! for the folly of those who laugh at God when He says, "I wi'l do a thing." they responding, "You can't dolt." Go I says that the Bible Is true?It Is all true. Bishop Colenso laughs, Herbert Hponoer laughs, Stuart Mill laughs, great German universities laugh, Harvard laughs?softly. A great many of the learned Institutions, with long rows of professors seated on tho fenoo between Christianity and Intldellty. laugh softly. They say, "Wo didn't laugh.' That was Sarah's trlek. God thunders from the heavens. "But tliou didst laugh !" The garden of K len was only a fable. There never was any ark built, or tf It was built It was too small to have two of every kind. The pillar of lire by night was only the northern lights, the ten plagues of Rgypt only a brilliant speelmen of Jugglery. The sea parted because the wind blew violently a great while from one direction. The sun and moon did not put themselves out of the way for Joshua. Jacob's ladder was only horizontal and picturesque clouds. The de?lr.?l? ? - j..., ... VI pinii nut inn iirsmorn In K<ypl was only cholera infantum become epidemic. The Kullet of the whale, hy positive measurement, too small to swallow a prophet. The story of tt?? Immaoulatn concept ion li shock to nil decuuey. The lime, the dumb, the blind, the halt, cured |>y mere liumnu surgery. The resurrection of t'hrM's friend only a bountiful tatdenu, I'hrist itu I I.i/.arns an I Mary and Martha acting their parts well. Mv friends, there Is not n doctrine or statement of Ood's holy word that has not been derided by the skepticism of ilie day. I take up this l ook of King James's translation. I consider It a perfect bible, but here are skeptics who want It torn to pieces. And now, wltli this Itlhto in iny hand, let lie tear out all lliosa portlous which the skepticism of this day demands shall ho torn out. What shall go llrst? "Well," says some one In i he audience, "take out all that about the creation and utiout the llrst settlement of III" world." Away goes <1 >ueais. "Now," ays so-no one, "lake out all that about the miraculous t;ul lun-mof thochlblrcn of Israel in tlie wilderness." Away goes Kxodu*. "Now," ?ii\s so am one else In the audience. "Iht ra are things In Deuteronomy an I Klti{s that at not fit to be read." Away go Deuteronomy rnd the Kings. "Now," says aoine oil", "the book of Job Is a fable that night to ootne out." Away ko"8 the book of Job. "Now." says some oil", "those pass?>*es In the New Testament which Imply the llvlnily of Jesus Christ ought to oomu out." Aw.IV IT" ill.. IAi.mi..-11-l. ,,u e - ?.rtun, nitys onto one. "h? took of K'vi'liillon ? how preposterous! It represents n min with the iuooii iin l.tr hit f? ? nut n sharp s*or I In til* hnti-l." A w.ty go * the hook of Hereintlon. Now there are n few pieces loft. What shall wo do wilti ttietn? "Oh," nays * >tne mini in the nil italic1, "I don't believe u or.I initio Hilda from one end to tlie other." Well, it is nil kooc. Now you have put out tho Inst light (or the nations. Now It Is tlie pitch i);irkii<*Ms of eternal int.!ni*ctit. How do you like it lint I tliill's, my lr..*n Is, wo had hotter keep the liitilo n little lot?g"r iutnnt. It has (!one pretty well for n good innny years rtu'ii there nr.- old people who flntl It a coinfort to have It ou their laps, uul children like to.* storms in It. Let us keep it (or n curiosity any how. If the Hilde In to tie thrown out of the school it no out of the courtroom, so that men no more swear by It, mid it is to he (nit In a dark corridor ot the city lihrniy, the Koran on one side and the writings ol Confucius ou the other, thou let us each one keep u copy lor him?elf, for we might have trouble, and wo would want to be under the delusions of lis consolations, and we might die, and wo would want llie delusion of the exalted residence of (lot's right linn I, which It mentions. Oh, what an awful thing It Is to laugh In do i's face and hurl His Revelation hack at film! After awhile the day will come when they will siy they did not laugh. Then all the hypercriticisms, alt the caricatures and nil the learned sneers In the quarterly reviews will be brought to ju tgmonr, and niiild the rocking of every tiling heti?utii and ami I the B..,r,l?r. ... I. .u ? ijimuik 1 Will ( II1111 der, "But thou didst UuKb!" I think the moot fascinating laughter at Christianity I ever remenih *r was a man in New Kugland. Ho made th? wor-l of (io.t seem ridiculous, nnd ho laughe I on at our holy religion until he cnine to die, nod then he said: "My life him been n failure \ failure domestically. I have no children. A f ailure socially, for I nm trented In the streets like a pirate. A failure professionally because 1 know hut one minister that hits adopted my sentiments." For a quarter of a century h? laughed at Christianity, and ever nice Christianity has been laughing at him. Now, it is n moan thing to go Into a man's house and steal his goo is, hut I tell you I ho most gigantic lew glary ever Invented Is Ilia propitsltlon tu steal tl'^ < ireasur-rs of our lio'y r dlglon. The meanest laughter ever ntt'Tod ts the laugh of the .kept i.'. The next laughter mentioned In the Bible Is David's laughter, or the expression of spiritual exultation. "Then was our mouth HUM with laughter." lie got very ntUOll down sometimes, but there are other ehapters where for four or five times ho calls upon the people to oral* and i-Jtult. It was not a mere twit'*h of the Itivw --It was a demonstration that took hold ol his whole phya.eal nature. "Then was our month IVhs| with laughter." My friends, this worhl will never | he converted to Oo?l until Christians cry less nnd laugh and sing more. The horrors are a poor halt. If people are to he persu ?d? I to adopt our holy religion. It wllll*. because they have made up their minds It I" a happy religion. They don't like a mortdd Christianity. I know there are mortdd noeplewho enjoy a funeral. They come early to seethe friends take leavsof the cor|>se, and they .teal a rhle to the cemetery, hut all healthy people enjoy a we lding better than they do a burial. Now. you make the religion of Christ sepulchral nnd hearsellke, and you make it repulsive. I say plant the rose of rthuron along the church walks and eolumldne to c1*mt>er over thi church wall, ami have a smile on the Hp. snd have the mouth nilsi with holy laughter. There Is no man In the worh', except the Christian, i hat haa a right to foe| an untrammclod glen, lie is promised everything la to t>e for the lend here, and ha l? on the war to a delight which will tuke all the procession* with palm branches aud all the orchestras harped and cymbaled nud trumpeted to expreus. "Oil," | you say, "I have so much trouble." Have you more trouble than Paul had? What cKos no aay? "Sorrowful, yot always rejoicing. Foor, vet making many rich. Having nothing. yet possessing all things." The merriest laugh I think I have ever hoard ha* been In the sickroom of Clod's dear children. When Theodoslus was put upou the rank, he suffered very gront toriuro at tho first. Somebody asked him how he dured all that pain on the rack. H? roplieo "When I was first put on the rack, I suffered a great deal, but very soon a young man In whtto stood by my able, and with a soft an t comfortable handkerchief ho wiped the sweat from my brow, and my pains were relieved. It was a punishment for me to get from the rack, because when the pain was all gone tho angel was gone." Oh. rojotce evermore I You know how It Is In the army?an anny In encampment. If to-day news comes that our side has had a defeat, and to-morrow another portion of tho tidlugs conies, saving wo have had another defeat, It demoralises nil the host. Hat If the news comes of victory to-day and victory to-morrow tho whole army Is Impassions 1 for the contogl. Now, In the kingdom of our Lord Jesus Christ report fewer defeats tells us Ihe victories?victory over sin and death and hell. Itejolco evermore, and again I say rejoice. I iwiiuvo there Is more religion In a laugh than In n groan. Anyboily can groan, but to Inugh In the rnhlst of banishment and persecution and Indescribable trial, that required a David, a Daniel, a l'aul, a modern heroine. The next laughter mentioned In the Blblo that I shall speak of Is the fool's laughter, or the expression of sinful merriment. Bolomon was very quick at simile. When he makes a comparison, we all catch It, What Is the laughter of a fool like? lie says, "It Is the crackling of thorns under a pot." The kettle Is swung, a hunch of brambles is nut under It, nnd the torch Is applied to It, and there Is a great noise, and a big blase, nnd a sputter and a quick extinguishment. Then it Is darker than It was before. Fool's laughter. The most mtserahlo thing on earth Is a bad man's fun. Thoro they are?ten men in a barroom. They have at home wives, mothers, daughters. The Impure Jest starts at one corner of tho barroom, and crackle, crackle, crackle If goes all around. In MX) such guffaws there Is not one Item of happiness. They all feel hemeaned If thoy have any tonsolenee left. Have nothing to do with men or women who tell immoral stories. I have no confidence either In their Christian character or their morality. Bo all merriment that springs out of the defects of others?caricature of a lamo foot, or a curved spine, or a blind eye. or a deaf ear Will be met with the Judgment of Oo I, dther upon you or upon your children. Twenty years ago I knew a man who was particularly skillful In imitating the lameness of a neighbor. Not long ago a son of the skillful mimic bad his leg amputated for the very defect which his father had mimicked years before. I do not say It was a judgment of Hod. I leave you to make your own Inference. Bo all merriment born or dissipation, ttint which start* nt the counter of the drinking restaurant or tho wineglass in the homo circle, the mini 111 it simper, the men Minifies* joke, the snt urnitlliin gibberish, the paroxysm ot mirth about nothing which you sometimes see iu the fashion* nble olilbrooni or the exquisite parlor nt twelve o'clock nt night, nretlie cradling of thorns under a pot. Such laughter i?2*l such sin end In death. Wh?n I was a lad. a book came out entitled, "Dow .Junior's Patent Sermons."' It made n great stir, a very wide laugh, all over thy country, thit book did. It was a caricature of the Christian ministry, and of the word of God, and of the day of judgment. Oh, we had a grout laugh ! The commentary on the whole thing is that the author of that hook died In poverty, shame, debauchery, kicked out of society and cursed of Almighty Ood. The laughter of such men Is the echo of their own damnation. The next laughter that I shall mention as b??lng In the Bible Is the laugh of Go I's condemnation, "He that sltteth In the heavens shall laugh," Again, "Tho Lord will laugh at hltn." Again, "I will laugh at his calamity." With such demonstration will Go I greet every kin l of great sin and wickedness. But men build up villainies higher and higher. Good men almost pity God lev cause He ia so schemed against by men. Huddcnly a pin drops out of the machinery of wickedness or 11 secret is revealed, and the foundation begins to roek. Finally the whole thing Is demolished. What Is the matter? I will tell you what the matter is That crash ot rulu is only the reverberation ot God's laughter. In the money market there are a great many good men ami a great many fraudulent men. A fraudulent man there says, "I mean to have my million." He goes to work reckless of honesty, and he gets his llrst 100,000. He gets after awhile his 200,000. After awhile he gets his 500,000. "Now," he says, "I have only one more move to make, and I shall have my million." He guttlers up all his resource*. He makes that one last grand move, he fails and loses all, and he lias not enough money of Ills own Icit to pay the cost of the ear to his hotno. People cannot understand this spasmodic revulsion. Home said it was a sudden turn In Krie Ballway stock, or In Western Union, or In Illinois Central ; somo said one thing and some another. 'I'bey all guessed wrong. I will tell you what It was. "lie that stttcth In the heavens laughed." A man In New York said he would l>e the richest man in tho city. Ha left Ills honu? work as a mechanic and got Into the city councils some way and In ten years stole f 15,000,000 from the city government. Fifteen million dollars ' He held the Le-2Mature of the State of New York in the grl* of bis right hand. Huspidous were aroused. The grand jury presented Indictments. The whole land stoo I aghast. The man who expected to put half the city In his vest pocket goes to Blackwell's Island, goes to Ludlow street jail, breaks prison and goes n?*rt tb- sen is rearrested - *l back and again remandel fa Jal'. Why" "He that sltteth In the hen vans laughed." IlnrilM VILHit iPr.sn# nmrilr.i I, ,,| llor i.m and Virgil among hvr poetw , *h? had Aoguitus and Constantinn anntn,' her wnmrnri. Kill what mean the ileliwitl P.inlhrnn, an Ih# Forum tome t Into a ciltl? market, an I the broken welled t'oliwuin. and the amli'teeturnl skeleton of her great nquetu-ts.' What win Ihnt thunder? "Oh," yon any, "that was the roar of tho battering run* against her walls." No. What wm that quiver? "Oh,''you My, "ilint win the lrani|i of hostile legion*.'* No, Tho quiver nn I tho roar were the outburst of omnipotent laughter from tho dotted and tnauttnt lieavans. Home defied (to I, an t He laughe I Iit down. Thebea da tie I tin 1. and Ho Ian rho I hor <lown. Nineveh dolled find, nn I llo laughed hor down. Babylon defied flo I. an?l Ho laughed her down. Thorn in n great difference between do IN lau/ii all I ll'S amllo. Ilia wmlle Ih eternal b?ntltu|e. l|-? smiled when Davidsnug. aud Miriam. Inppe I the cymbals, and Hnun ih nuido garments for hor won, and I'aul preached, nn I John kindled with npoevlyptlo visioii.^ ,y) J when any man has anything In mi!" a It woll. His smite' Whv.lt Is ty. tho apple nreharda In lull tddWfT 11 " Inn breaking on a rippling n^S/jlfoJfchnven at high noon, all the b. lis be marriage peat, hut Ilia laugldej^ti'tijdt never fall on naf It la a eondnnifrW|^V '*>r our tin . It Is a wasting away. Wo may let the satirist laugh at us, nn I nil our eoniDnnlotiH tnav Inu rh nt us. nn I W'? may t><? ma'lo tho targ>n (or tho tii'Trm-ou nt mrth in<l holl, l>ut Oo I forbll that wo nlinuM over oomn to tho fulflllmont of tlr? prophooy again*t tho rojootor* of?fr?iti?, "I will laugh nt your mUmlly " But. my frt?-n'l?, alWnf ii* who rojwt f'hrUt on I th > purilon of tho go?pnl rinmt com? un-W thnt trcmcndona bomharlmont. flo I want* m ?lllo rrpont. Ilo eoiwaola, Ho itf*, He Importnnoa, ah I lf? <He* for n?. H* coin** flown out of heaven. Ha pot? nil I!?? wnrM"* rln on on? ahonhler, Il? put* nil the worhl'-t nrrnw on tho other ahouMer. nil I thou with that Alp on ono nMn ?n I thnt lllnrtlai i on tho other llo atarla up th-? hill l?aeli o'.leruaaiem to aatilevo our aalvntlou. Ifepirathe palm of lfl? right foot on ono lor ' op'ke. nn<l Ilo pui* I ho pAloi of III* lett foot on another long aplke, mil tboo, with HI* hnn<l* npitte I wlih Hi* own 'on I|n goAtloiilnloo, awying ' liOnV. Ino'c in I l.?f, With tha crimaon roil of My aiertltei^ I will rovr up nil vour *ln* , with Mv ilym ; groan I will *w?l'ow up nil jour groin*. f?ooh I 1,1 vo !' But n lhou?nn I of you turn your hack on thnt, nn I Ihon thi* ro ? * o," Invitation turn* to a ton* ?tlvliiolv o nlnon*. thnt KOba like ? nlmoorn through I ho ikr*t chapter of Proverb ' Beean** I havi onllott An>1 jr.* ratn*a<|, t have Mroto'io I o?r My right han l, an t no mnn rogirlo', hu? yehavoaot nt naught nil My roun**l nn I wonht nono of Mvreproo', I. nUo, wilt laugh at your calamity *' O i, what* tan rii that la ?% <loop laugh, a long, r-v <r?r it la: laugh, an ovorwholm'ng Inugh. (In I grant wa may navor hoar it. But 1* thla <lay of merciful rlattatIon ylai t your heart to Chrlat. T runt you may spend all your llfo on earth under Hiss'iillennd escape forever the tbunilerof thi laugh of Goj's indignation. The other laughter mentlone 1 In the Blblo, the only one I shall speaV o", is heaven's laughter, or the expression Ol eternal triumph. Christ said to His disciples, "Blessed are ye that wesp now, fo ye shall laugh." That makes me kuorf positively that we are not to spend out" days in hrnveu singing long meter psalnis. The formallstlo and stiff notions of heaven that some peonle hare would make me miserable. I am glad to know that the heaven of the Bible Is not only a place of holy worship, but of magnificent sociality. "What." say you. "will the ringing laugh go around the clreles of the saved?" I Say yes?pure laughter, cheering laughter, holy laughter. ii wiii ne a laugn 01 cougraiuiauoD. wnen wo moot ? frlond who has sudden ly omo to a fortune, or who has got over somo dire sickness, do we not shako lauds, do wo not laugh with him/ And whoti wo get to heaven an.i ??"? out friends (here, somo of them having o< nta up out of g'cal tribulation, why, wo will any to ono of them, "The last time I saw you you had boon suffering for six weeks under a low Intermittent fever," or to aunt her we will say "You for ten years woro limping with tho rheumatism, and you wero full of eontplaints when we saw you last. I congratulate 3*00 on this eternal recovery." We shall laugh. Yes, we shall cougratuhite nil those who hava eom ? out of great flnaneial embarrassments in tlds world because they have become millionaires in heaven. Ye .shall laugh. It shall boa laugh of I; lasso?iatIon, It Is just as natural for Us to laugh when we meet a friend we have not seen for ten years as anything is possible to bo nature'. When we meet our friends Irom whom we have been partod ten or twenty or thirty years, will it not be with infinite congratulation? Our perception , quiekene t, our knowledge Improved, we will know eaoh ollu>r ut it M'uli \Vi? will linvn to tullr nv?r all that lias happened sines w? have boon separated, the one that has been tenyaarsia heaven telling us all that-has happened in the t<Mi years of his heavenly residence, an I we ("Hint; him in return all that has hap pencai during the ten years of his nlmence from earth. Ye shall laugh. I think Osow Whltedeld and John Wesley will have a laugh of contempt for th?ir earthly collisions, and Topludy and Charles Wesley will have a laugh of contempt for th-dr earthly misunderstanding, and the two farmers who were In a lawsuit all their days will have a laugh of contempt over their earthly disturbance about a line fence. Exemption from all annoyance. Immersion in all glad twns Ye shall laugh. Christ says so. Ye shall laugh. Yes, It will ne a laugh of triumph. Oh. what a pleasant thing It will he to stand on the wall of heaven and look down at satan and hurl at him defiance and see bim caged and ohalne I and we forever free from his clutches ! Alia! Yes, It will be a laugh of royal greeting. You know how the Frenchmen cheered when Napoleon came hack from Elba , you know how th? English cheered when Wellington eaino hack from Waterloo , you know how Americans cheered whon Kossuth arrived from Ifungurv ; you remember hour Home cheered when I'ompcy oatne hack vl torloua over 900 cities. Every cheer was a laugh. Hut. oh, the mightier greeting, the iilry troop of hfiivcti shall go through the strwlf, nnil, neeor<llng to thu Book of Itevelatlon. Christ in (lit led coat, the crimson coat, on i? white horn", and nil the armies 01 heaven following Him on white hor*"s ! Oh, when wo sou nn I hour iluit cavalcaiio we shall cheer, wo shall laugh ! Does not your heart heat i|iiickly at the thought of the great Jublloe upon which wo are soon to enter? I pray (Sod that when we get through with this world an?l are going out of It wo may have some such *rlston as the lying Christian Inri Avium ho saw written all over the elouns In the sky toe letter an'l they nskeil Sim. standing bv hisside, what he thought that letter "W" meant. 'Oh," he said. "that stands fur w ?! come." Ami so may it ho when we quit this worhl. "W" on the gate, "W'on the iloor of the mansion. "\Y ' on the throne. Welcome! Welcome! Welcome! I liav? preached this sermon with tlvo prayerful wishes?that you might ? what a mean tiling is the laugh ot scepticism, what a bright litis is the laugh of so.ritual exultation. what a hollow thin ; is the laugh of sinlul merriment, what an nw.'ul tiling is th lau^ii < I ??i?-ii a r.i 1 jiilit. rubicund thing is the laugh of eternal triumph. Avoid the III , choose the light. Be comforted. "Blesse I lire ye til it weep DOW?)'t shall laugh , ye shall laugh." PROMINENT PEOPLE. FnovrsHOH K. A. Kl.n Ki'.r.R, nn eminent Herman scieutist, Is now making a tour o( ihis country. Hbkatods <Ji?av mil llltokhurn am th<* most conspicuous ilrwjere In the United Htatea Senate. In liia own town of Hartford, Conn., "Murk Twain" la aald to bo noted for hla shrewd bargains. It baa been decided to uroelalm Sanford B. Dolo President of the Hawaiian Republic) without an election. Ernkst l.o<iortLMw, a aon of the poet, who llvra In Manchester, Mass.. has no lit* crary bent, but la n good painter. AmonA. Ehersolb, of Hillsdale College. I Michigan, won first prize in the national ililnr.iAllnoiut.t Asatoalcul -? - ? a Thk p*r?on of the Emperor of (lerinnny is to be closely #uar<led h*<re*ft?r, and a mag* IMrato and dctoctlvrs will constantly atten I him. ' "Oknkhaf." Booth, Commander-in-Chief ol th'> H.ilvallon Army, says, and says It emphatically, that ho never rends th?? newspaper*. BImk. Cakmot declined a pension because \ she thought France 1l<l enough when tt paid h?>r dead husband th < homage of a national funeral. Mas. Kai.i.ik Chatham Cordon-Law, known In the South as "tho mother of the Confederacy,'* died, a few days n#o. at Memphis. ItM'hkskmrarivk Siri.kt, of I'ennsyIvaiila, divides his salary anion# charitable Institutions In his district, ant only retainsenou#h to pay lila actual living expenses. Conorkssman N. M. Curtis. of the Twenty-sccond New York District, Is six feet four Inches tall, hut he Is shorter than Congressman Albert Heaton Berry, of Kentucky. Km Domai.ii Ktxwaiit, who has arrived In this country on a visit, Is one of the live British (let.I marshals, and the first offbier of that r ink to set foot on American soil. ThuUIN II ftiri i, nM',1. A alllr lint Ho twilight oim Hourly sis yaars ago and braved public sentiment beneath It f?>r noar|y a fortnight l ilt ho ^ouldo't stand the pressure longer t linn that. Hknatoiin Hhkrmam nn<l Hoar and axHouator Kvart* arc nil related. The latter two nro double mutlni, both on tholr fathers' ami on thotr mothers* side, ant whon Mr. Ev.nrta was a youth Honntor Hoar's fnthnr wna his guardian. RsraKHRMTATiTR IUii.kv, of Texas, has an at*<<nl-minded way ol touring up papers whllr In tvinvoiMtlon. A fow dnyxngo, beforo ho know It, ho tin I torn Into little blta an elaborate speech which ho had sat op all the night before to write. Smallest Woman on Earth. Sin"o the (loath of Luoia 'A irate, tho "Mexican midget," th? title of b)in ( tho Htnalleat woman on earth has fallen to Mlto. Paulina, a native of Holland. Hho i* now nearly eighteen yours of age, in hut twonty inched high and weight a few oitncos loaa than nine pounds. Unlike most midgets (who are usually hideous monstrosities) she is remarkably pretty and accomplished, speaking four different languages fluently. ?St. Louis Kopnblio. Anfomifir Has Meter*. Twelve thousand automatic pai meters?or, to give them their popular name, "i>euny-in-the-alot" meteri MM now in use in Liverpool alone, and lUUL *re in great demand in London, ^H^hester and Birmingham, while 800 provinoiml gas companies are nego tiatiQgor have negotiated fur a supply ?Chicago Herald. ' - k#i ' > W-TT FARM AND UARDEIf. | TilVE STOCK THE SHEET ANCHOR. Stay by your live Btock, no matter how hard times get, and if there is any one on earth who will be able to live with comparative ease you will bo that one, for when stock husbandry fails there will be but little show for anything else.?New York Wochl. THE FtlAX CROP. Flax is a very exhaustive crop. It takes all its nitrogen from tho soil, and both the grain and stalk are rich in nitrogenous matter. If the fibre could be separated from tho stalks before they are steeped in water and partly rotted, the stalks would inako a rich fertilizer. But as the tlax is usually placed in running water to rot, most of the plaut foo l it contains is washed sway and lost. Wo do not beliov.e it pays Eastern farmers to attempt to grow fiax for it.% seed nloue. It exhausts fertility too much. At prosent flax seed can bo bought fol less than it ought to sell, provided the Western farmers who grow this crop were as caroful as they should be about maintaining the fertility of their soil.?Boston Cultivator. ORIT FOR FOWriS. After reading aud hearing much About pounding crockery for fowls, write* M. R. Allen, I thought I would try l,bo experiment, though with but little faith that the fowls wouhl care much for such provonder. It. was a much dreaded job ; for I supposed I must pouud up "a lot" and gather it. up into a dish for theui to pick at their leisure. But I found on trial that tho stuff Hew everywhere ; so that businesa soou played out. Next I took a Hat stone into the hen house, with a hammer, and ponnde.l away till I was tired. At Hrst tho liens paid no attention to the grit; but after a few days of confinement when tho ground was covered with snow, I noticed that the broken china had all disappeared, and it was not long before I had to drive them back for fear of ponding their heals, so anxious were they to get the hard grits. Broken glass and dishes were utilized, thus clearing tho pantry sholvos of useless rubbish.?National Stockman. niiXNKKTISO snKKI*. It was an old custom with early breeders of merino sheep in Italy and elsewhere to cover the Iambs with a ....I 1;?.? ? i __ . nwi i *?i iiiiuii nmi i, nr\nvi ??i|# nil us | ') keep a constant pressure on the wool, anil wotting this covering with warm water to inako the wool soft and sleek As the lamb grew the bandage w.n loosened slightly, but kept tight enough to hoM the fibers together. The lamb was killed whan its pdt reached tho highest value for the desired purpose. It was, an J is, a practice of some sheep raisers to keep coverings on their sheop to give greater quality to the fleece. The prictico is quite common with exhibitors at sheop shows At thi (blombinti World's Fair, H. <1. McDowell allowed in his large exhibit wh it ho was pleased to call Ins "'light toppe I" Dickinson dclaiue memoes. They had evidently been blanket.) 1 huic.i they wore shorn last spring. The effort **- *?" rluuiiw Too eiuvips wiw iniiu^, itu<i vum vjiiiu^ of the fleeces were groat'y outlined J. --American A3ric11lturi.it. odd lioniKi made ivro KKfiriDtZKK. i'.xrmers whose horses are played out and useless cnu sell them for $1.50 to 8- a pie33 to establishm * 1111 that convert the animals into a fertiliser, nays the Drovers' Journal, an I then later 0:1 the farmer puroUam t'i > fertilizer and plants the output of his old horses where it will enrich his crops and hasten their growth. The manner of disposing ot the animals is this: When led from the pen the horse is tied to a post au 1 the "black cap" placed over its heal. The executionor then strikes it acrosi the liea 1 with an a\ and the animal falls helpless to the floor. Its throat is then cut and life vanishes. This done, the process of dissection and separation begins. The hide is tirst removed and the carcisi boiled, if it contains any fat. The greaia is designated as "horse oil." The hones of "the lower limbs aro boiled, and the fat extracted from them is called "neatsfoot oil." When the flesh of the oarcaas has been thoroughly boiled and the greaso skimmed oft' the surface of the vat it is thrown int > the cellar and allowed to reinaiu there for over fhrea months, all the time being cahjecto I to the irilluenco of potash and gypsum, which in mixod with i? and which rots it. The bones pass through two crushers, the first of which reduces them and the second grinds them to powder. Several chemical ingredients are then mixed with the bone dust. This preparation is what is commonly known a* lione fertilizer, and is probably the liest artificial commodity used in agriculture. The horse hides are 41i*|>oh?m ok to l^atikor in*rMiiA<Hitrer*, r.nd bring more then wee originally paid for the entire animal. lhit not homea alone nro uae 1 in the prodnetion of fertilizer. A great many nettle go that way, too, and a* for bonea, thorte of any animal are valuable. Heverai qualities of fertilizers are produced from animala; it all depending upon the amouni. and quality of the ingredicnta naod. Various vegetables and cereal* require fertilizer of a certain atreugth, and while a certain quality will produce goo 1 result* on one kind of vegetable it will destroy another. The price per tou ranges all the way from $i I to 5 J.?. H4T MD(/'H AH A KKII ri Wishing to uho a piece of Ian I that wan apparently a most barren, worthlean plot of ground, one of my neighbora tried noma experiment*, writes Thomas Brabazon, of Connecticut, in the American Agrioulturint. The only regetetion apparent wae a Meant/ growth of dAiwiea, a few hntteroupj, and a large quantity of Hour gr.i<R or field aorrol. The soil war of har I pi*t, and in e drouth it war h*ke I to the depth of tiro or nix i nolle*, eu i Kotaihir more: and I have aeeu a aty ahower laatji*? annual h >ure pournown upon it nnm TCinr?/.n?-i ?i though it would deluge the whole aim f?o?, hut to mj Rurpriee, After it ht! oeaaed raining for two honra, tliu ground seemed aa herd nod dry m i i htd been before. ? . I HP n \*r a m rv C ? ? i I 1 ClIVV 1IV/ 4^UI I Royal Bakii I It is Absoli || All others contain , Ilir.N at the Polo. In the countries bordering on the Polar seas, w hero the changing seasons bring alternately the two extremes of , dearth and plenty, birds are more j numerous in the short an miner than anywhere olso all the world over, and in winter absent altogether. All are emigrants t tore by force of circumstances. In like manner the birds of temperate climates are affected by thu seasonal changes, though in n less degree, through the influence of cold and heat, upon their food supplies rather than hy effect of cold upon their well-protected bodies. A coat of mail ia not to be compared to a coat of feathers for safety, ho far as a bird's life ia concerned. Layer upon layer of feathers can withstand any amount of water or any degree of cold; in proof of this sec how tho delicate torn, after wintering in comparatively mild weather, go back to the ieo floe* of the Polar Sea and lay their eggs on tho ice. For two or three weeks the tender breast of tho Hca swallow is pressed against a cold block of ice. Again, as atiothur example of the influence of food rather than climate in governing bird action, take the colony of beccaticos. The beoeatioo is u Mediterranean bird common on the southern Hhorcs of Spain and Italy, in tho (ireciaa Islands, Sioily and Malta, and on the northern shores of Africa. Formerly it was quite unknown in tho British Isles, 1>ut Home years ago h largo orchard of tig trees was planted near Brighton, an 1 the beccalleos have discovered the fin't and come ovor to sliari the spoil. Doubtless the nightingales told tlietu the story of Knglish tigs and showed theui the way over. Bo this as it may, the little birds from the warm shores of the Mediterranean bid fair to become established as naturalized British subjects. --LiiloH's Living Ago. M*ver Pci'ontoil. The number of great, generals who were never defeated in buttle is very small. Kven -liilitis Caesar, one of the most fortunate of generals, was defeated at (iergovia and in one of his minor ? ugagements with l'otnpo$". Among the nneionts, Alexander the Ureal was uniformly successful, and Ho defi at is known in the career of either Sulla or Seipio Afiicaiius after they had become commanders. Several generals of modern times have eiirueu i imk iiihi iiiciioii. i iiivrri roniwell was victorious from Iiih lirst engagement lit tirantham to Ins final victory lit Worcester. TI?o great |>..U~ mC IHS^UI Cllloil It) win in every buttle and every siege. The Duke of Wellington wan equally successfully. Among contemporary commanders may lie mentioned the names of Count von Moltke r<nd \ iscouul Wo La ley. - Ne\? \ ?k DiauatoJ' j Fur our a quarter of a century. Doctor I ricrco's Oolden Meoirnl Discover* baa L?n offeotirif? rurrt of Hronchial, Throat and I-uiiR alTartinn*. Wenk Lungs, Isliv-diiig from Lungs, Bronchitis, Asthma, nil lingerinjr Coughs, Consumption, or Lung Hviufuh* anil kiuurci mttluilit-*, nro cured l>y it. REDUCED TO A SKELETON. Mrs. Mira Mn.i.s. of Sartll*. lug stont Co., Jlfifin.. wrllrt: " Otio . <S\#T?a-v. yiir nun I (flvpii tip f ,ni '"'nily tilivftlcmn .'!< wii'l frlonda; nil wtlil [ i"""' '11" My limits |K.a W wrrr bitdly nn<l S5SSr Jl body reduced to a nkolnwB Q ton. My people roin' ' \i mrnitMl fo give ino y??ur w, \ J 'Medical Iilncnvcry* V / an<l I soon l--|ran to A mend. It trim not lonjr \ / before I boon mo wo 11 enough to take ohitriro wSS*~ i?y huuochold duties again. Mr*. Mima. . ' nnw*n. my wwywy to Or. Plrrcei Go'.len Medical Discovery." FilTTum , UUiiLl 1 JLJU V I I Boston i II A?? J I *T II } HIGHEST AWARD ; LOVELL DIAK A1 > California Midw J AT SAN PR/ Have You? Mr iV5 tlifcti hou? acco with I fi V c tries inci. p'11 ?; , t; suit suits you, for it will suit you ; Beware SIS tbipg in pUtc of l'e?i)in?, Uo lite bone** tli < I bstitute for I ng Powder. I utely Pure. 1 alum or ammonia. B Ulgnnlir Lfl.lTM. Palms have tli a ropntat i<?n of possessing tho largest leaves. TIioho of the? Quaja palm of the Amazon ineasuro sometimes eighteen foot in length aud are almost equally broa I. The natives make tents of thoiu. Tlio leaf of the ooooanut is nearly thirty foot long. A single loaf of the parasol magnolia, of Coylon, may shade fifteen or twenty persons. One of tlieso carried to Eugland measured nearly thirty-five feet. The largest leaf grown in temperato elimates is that of the Victoria regiar which is sometimes seven foei iadiamv* tor. ?Wcientiti.' American. A young woman in liKlianapolin. lml., dahho 1 h *r faco with powdored charcoal instead of powdered ntaroli wli"ii lior boudoir was in scmi-darknos", and became f-n inocneod at the J uproarious laughter of hor liancuo I when lie called that cvcuiug that she i hroko tlio engagement. Afterward alio discovered the cause of his mirth niifl fainted. KNWEEDOE firings comfort ami improvement an# tends to personal enjoyment when rightly whom. The many, who live better than others ami enjoy life* more, with less ?'X|Minliturc, l?y nmrc promptly adapting tin- world's Inst products t<? the needs of physical being, will attest the value to health of the pure li<jui<l laxative principles embraced in tho remedy, Svrup of Figs. Its excellence is due to its presenting in the form most acceptable and pleasant to the taste, the relicsliing and truly beneficial properties of a |>erfect lax.ative; elTeettially cleansing the system. disiK'lliug coltls, headaches and lev* m ami |H'rmaneiitly curing constipation. It has given satisfaidion to millions ami met with the annroval of the tucdicaf profession, In cnu-e it acts on tin* Kidney*. laver ami I towels without weakening them an<l it U perfectly llec from every objertionaldc .substance. ^ Syrup of Fips is for pale l>v all druj* nn.i I... t I l,w# 1 ?l t in mail* ufaetured l>y the California r ip Syrup Co.only, whose name is printed oil every package, also (lie name, Syrup of Fip.\ and bcinp well informed, you will uot accept any substitute if utlcred. r*""icELRI3Es"**"| JWINE OF CARDUl.t I For"Female Diseases. \ 8. N. V.- ?? iirci L, Ma.s?s?*9 # M KIttll Tllh i AND GOLD MEDAL ' Til Kill ^ iniun pvnircJ riuiiu U I ULLW ' TilK J /inter Exposition, J INCISCO, CAL. ^ %%%-% %-%-%^%%%%% j j my Millions Have ptcd J line;* Pyle's invitation to liis wonderful discov< ry, Pyles line; for easy was/ihtg and elcatiYou couldn't count tlicm in a imc. Some of the twelve million ickecpera in this land must have pled very often. That's the way Pc trlinc. I he wise woman who stiy> -t< s, tri? !? it; the woman who ; it continiK u to use it. A daily asing sal?; proves it. The truth here's nothing so acceptable as dine. Once accept its help, and 11 decline the imitations?they t help you. It washes clothes or ns house. It saves labor and it ;s wear. It hurts nothing, but it's ed to everything. Try it when it when you try it. jome unscrupulous crocer* will tOI yon, "thin is or "the vime as Pearlinc." IT'S KALSE? :*er p??tsl!c<i, and if your grocer sends you someung? ttnJ it ba<k. JAME3 ?YLK, New Yot^ .. *