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the Cancastcr ?eirger. >2 per annum ISig Willi 4h?> wonden in advance 1 /amilg aaii ^olitirat XitaspapK?Utaattii ta Hit Arts, smarts, littrataw, ? flotation, Igritaltarr, 3atrnial 3ui)iruutiutu;s, /urtigu auii Puuirstic i'tuis, una tljt jllarltrts. VOLUME VIII. LANCASTER C. H, SOUTH CAROLINA, WEDNESDAY MORN I NO, JAN, II, 1800. N U M B E R 48. drtwt ^oetnj. . Ladies Luggage. How linppy is the single life (>rnil those priests and monks! Not one of whom has g?WR wife To bother him with trunks And bandboxes, n load too groat For man or horse to bear, Which railways charge for, over weight, ' And cobs nak double fore * t-ii euro, ns mm your bride you post, Distracts your anxious mind, l.e*t thin portmanteau should be lost Or that be left behind: Her baggage as you travel do -v n Life'* hill, weigh more and more, And still, an balder grows your crown , llecomcs n greater bore. Outstretehed by Fashion vile and vain, Hoop petticoats and vests, Now Kritixh females, to contain Require no end of chest*. To which bags; baskets, bundles, add, Too numerous to name, Knough to drive a poor man mad, A Job with rnge inflame. i The cab keeps swaying o'er your head, With luggage piled above, Of overturn you ride in dread, Willi her whom you should love ; i n? n you the station when you gain, Mnit nee thi>t lumber stowed, And fitnr* about it in the train. Your heart anil a ml corrode. I Thus doc* your wife, encli journey spoil Of yours that alio partakes, Thus keep you on the fret mid broil, Your pence and comfort break#, Willi all these boxes, all her tiling*, (How many !) to enuloac, The fair Kncuuibrunco on you brings A wagon-toad of much. ? [ Punih I '' Ssinrn TMUMU > H'lU. ? J it S? nicli of a Situation. ' p O i 1 J .t.t. l'tjirr* had jurt gi ?.!lia1 el from | I tl e mcic*ntiV iollege in New V? rk, and w ii a n-c in nlaiiun :<ii'I diploma in < Ii h p??k't. w ?? now in search ?.f a situ* 1 i iimi. 11?? *?? h goo.] looking \nung i man of t mt?-three ; 1im<I earned with I J.i? .'iii hands the ii onet I'rofrMor I'er < 'ittAi it Co*'.i'!!o d; <ifiir had receive*! in <h?rge for Ii it* (''Mention, :? ?], if we mis i I ale not, John IVtern wa* a native of a I ?m*!l town in Connecticut, which from ' -tile overnight on the j??rt of pre* i tioos compiler-, liar hxi die misfortune i 1*1 he e Hire!) overlooked hy the great I jMr. Hto<?k% i? hit u' iveraid scrutiny of Che Slate. j I For fear of rendering the town clasai-| I caH, ?a being the hif.li place of our hero, we sliall refrain from further mention of ' it, t ttisfi' d that the i nriosity wo lixve al I j^ndv CV-ited w ill induce future compilers ' U# be nio.v avcuhI'o in their researches, \ i an?l tliiu in course of li'tSA come to be ; aw*r<b-,t la the aforesaid town, ?n spile ? of it* present irola'ion and obscurity, its ' < due share of geographical importance. ; t In what pnrl of the city John Peter* I resided, or w here tie happened to t?e on thai morning to which we refer, is a point ] not clearly shown. I mil sorry, Imwever, j because llie locality of J >kin Peters might i ' tend to strengthen the identity of John peter*, and prevent bint (had this fact * with some oilier important iteina been death established tn the iiimd of the wealthy and iiitluential Joshua Muirs) from entrapping the pretty bird which policy and worldly calculation had alrea dy heal into the bush for John I'etera, , the second. That John Peters had been looking over the morning papers, cannot be doubled, from tbe fact tbai precisely nine o' . clock, a. rn , found bun standing at the l door of Mr. Joshua Meira' counting room; ] Mr. Joshua Meira having adv?>rii*ed that I morning for a book keeper. 1 'Mr. Mfirs I I believe I have the honor of addressing Mr. Joehu* Meira f' aaid John Peters, touching hia hat and bowing profoundly in the direction indicated. 1 _ 'The awie,' responded Mr. Meira. with a (rigidly dignified nod. 'Can I be of any service to you f Plaase proceed.' Julm I'elera hesitated and glanced a tiout the room; the presence of Mr. Meira waa recognisable In every object What shall I dot If there waa only a hole aomewhere,' thought John. If ut there waa no hole, and our hero proceed d. ^ | My name ia Petera?John Petera !' Mr. Meira apraog from hi* arm chair, ' aa though be had received a shock Jrom 1 some In visible battery. 'John Peters ! Ity all that's gracious !' ' cried Mr. Meira embracing him. And here, like an old simpleton have 1 been treating you, thinking you a stranger all the while, according to the moat frightful ruie? 01 Cliquene. t nicerve to be blow 1 od for ever licviut iiud?c>l Count de Or < ??)'? TreatiM. Hut bo* m your father f i ?bow atupid in me?1 can ice him in I erery future of your face?in good apirit?, I reckoo f?yea, I aee, no m?uer about | ;he aniwer?arrired in the morning train | , ?ail tired obt, no doubt f Ye?, of courae, I how eould I expect yon to be otherwise I -rode all oight. I ?ee. PcrfeoUy one*.11 4 , peciea, though?I didn't dream ol your coming before the eipiration of nuoilier week? think your father mid in bin letter a week from Friday?to day, let me see, i* Wednesday?which would leave it a week from day alter to morrow. But no matter; you are just as welcome? here comes the omnibus ; it will take us within two minutes walk of my residence and Bella is at home this morning. She can't hut he delighted?come'?Ami Mr. Meirs caught the arm of John and started in the direction of the street. 'I fear there is a slight misunderstanding somewhere,' faltered John, attempting to withdraw his arm ; 'it's true ntv name is John Beters'? 'Of course; and my name is Joshua tl t__ I metre, hiiu you are to marry my daugh ter liella. I can tee no causa of misun derstanding in the matter. Hallo !' lie shouted, ai the miiiip timo beckoning to the driver of the M>u<, and renewing his hold upon John Peter's arm. 'Hallo, there, two fates this wav The driver held np, and Mr. Meirs, in spile of the half-formed rem itistrances of (lie bewildered John Peters, huriied him into the 'bus, and in live minutes more they were ascending the marble steps of the merchant's residence. Ms Pella at home ?' inquired Mr. Metrs of tho servant on the landing. 'Troth, an' I think it was the voting ini?sties?'n voice I was after hearing just now ih the 'peann\* room.' Mr. Meirs led the wax* in the direction indicatetl, while John, much embarrassed, followed. lie felt it was high time some explanation wa? ofT-red Hut Mr. Meiis was too n.neh preoccupied with the on* idea?the identity of John l'otera, and his proposed connection with the Meirs family?to In ed the c -iilused and hr ken sentences :>r ??ur hern, and lli?* next 11)<>melt I found It i in face In luce with the mot I e*itchinglv beautiful creature he lied ever seen. *'l Itij* is Hell a,' said Mr. M?-irs, with some pride; 'y?>u d uhtless retnember her. This is your cousin John; I hope you have not forgotten him. What in the world makes vou stare so, hu*>sv f I told you his hair would he dark us tour own hy this time, hut you didn't heheve it.' Here Mr. Meirs consulted his watch slid said : 'Hut I must he in Wall street hy ten, so I shall he obliged to trust ton to your ow n government nil dinner.' Willi this Mr. Meirs departed, leaving our hero ii.descrihahly confused. No tooner was he gone than Hella huist into s ringing laugh, and oxel?imoJ, 'How funny !' Merriment is said to he contagious.? John I'eters laughed a reap msu to Holla, snd he had a most heautiful wav of do if-JJ i', w liicli Bella, in spite of tli? novelty < f tlii'ir situation, reality a< knowledge d w ilit a blush. ' l'l'ere has been a great mistake mailt,' i.ti'l J.il.n I'eters, bowing sorrow full v, as though lio wonlil a Hali) unfold.' 'I nie,' said Bella, 'voir are Irving to :our up your red Imir with a wig. I hate red hai-, Mini tho change makis you look Funny, it does indeed.' 'it is all a mistake,' pers'tted John, reddening, 'I never wore a wig in tnv life.' 'Then you must have colored i', for it was red ten years ago. and I used to laugh at jou when I was angry, and ad rise you to keep one eye open when vou ili'P', lest it set the S"I curtains on tire' 'What ail awkward situation,' cried lulin, dtsper iti !v, 'it is true that I am lobn I'eters, hut n?>t thd John I'eters you like 1110 for; and as for having red hair, [ never had that honor. I *s?ure yon.' It was now Ho'ln's turn to Inok sur jrised. 'And who are you then,' cried He la. if you are not John i'eters of Baltimore f On the contrary, I am John I'eters of Connecticut, a graduate from the mercanil? college, and at present in search of a situation. I am not your cousin.and nev r saw you, to my knowledge, before to lay. Though [ mustconfess you are the retijest girl 1 ever did *e?, hu<I I begin 0 onvy the genuine John Peters, your soucin, and 1 can't help liking you a great leal alrcadv.* 'Vou do i Indeed, how funny ! Then you are not my couain from Baltimore, ind what ia better Mill, my father think* fou are. I detent a cousin for my hua and, and above all a red haired husband. Hut how did it happen that papa tdiould nake such an odd mistake f lull me all iboul it.' 'Well, the fact ia the whole thing ?si 1 mistake from beginning to end, and at iihuted to an advertisement in the mornng paper, Your father wanted a book keeper and advertised. I saw the adver iseinent. and applied directly for the sit jation. Before stating my business I in .roduced on self as Peters, whereupon rour father, forgetting there might be mother John l'eters in the world, bun Hud me into an omnibus and hurried me tere before I could otfer any explanation.' 'How odd 1' exclaimed Bella. 'Anil you are not my cousin after all, but 1 ralber like you, and am not a little picas' id with the adventure, because wo can both laugh together Over father's mistake, wrf the absent John Peters' red hair.' put I must explain the matter imme. 11..LI. . I / a f J' 1 l_ _ aL . uaieiv, iiiougti i come** 1 uienan me den of giving you up to the ?l?eni J.dm i'elera, answered our hero, with the name winning entile, 'especially at you have a latural antipathy to ooueine with red tiair.' 'I don't eee the use of explaining. Sup poee we both keep quiet and let it go for granted you are coualn John?what Itarm f 'And then eoppoeing that hf, thinking me Cousin John, ehould inaiat on your being married before the genuine John l'eters come* i' '(J ! it would he delighlfnl ! I do so liHtw to marry my cousin ; besides I like you h thousand times bolter. There isn't i the least romance in marrying one's cou sin, especially such a fcousin as John I'e j ters of Baltimore.' Here He'la iaid her pretty white hand | on John's arm and said, 'Hut you don't ! care for me ; of course you wouldn't like to be married to please me. I don't blame you either, but I wouldn't marry my cousin John if I could help it' 'On the contrary,' cried John, clasping the little hand warmly, 'I would give the i worM for that privilege.' I hen \ ou must promise inn to keep still and let the matter rest as it is. You will, won't von ?' I cortainiy,' answered John, 'if it please yon. I should be a brute to oh. ject, shouldn't I V < >n Ida return, and to his no little de j j light, Mr. Meirs found Bulla deeply inter esled in cousin John. '1 thought jou would cotuo round,' said lie. 'These girls are always perverse 1 when their lovers are out of sight, bill ' might , warm hearted and agreeable when ! they have got together. Ilowbeit, I fan1 , i oy there is a slight reign ol duplicity in l the hest < f them, I do.' O no, papa, you should not lie so hasty in your conclusions, for liav'nl 1 told j you all along that cousin John's hair was ! red, and that my principal objection was I based upon that fact. Hot you see there is a slight mistake souiewliete, fur his i hair (pointing to our Item's) isouiiu dark 1 and glossy. I must readdy coiitess.papa, ' that I like John very much; a great deal | tietler than ! expected. I do indeed !' | 'Tii'-o.' said Mr. M?-irs, exultinglv, 'if 1 wete m John's place, 1 would just take th? lit e?ty to strike whiie the iron is hot. \ Thvie i? nothing gained bv delays, and llelK'O Mil 1111 <4111 I e Hh li ir oil lite handle as you were a week ago.' 'O ius I hiii not so tickle ; l>ul 1 will leave the whole matter to you and lohn. | Whatever he and you tliiiik proper, I will Hlllill.it to.' 'Tlirte ttella, you talk like a sensible j girl, iT'ii! Mr M^ith. 'I like vour resoiu tion. There in nothing ho rare in thin I world a> ? sensible girl at your time of life. J .li it is tiO fi p or prolligiAe ; he ) will look to your interest and, I believe, will |>e worthy of you. As for liie wed ling it shall he left with \ou to sav.? i Hell a i* willing, and I tan see nothing at all to prevent ils taking (dace right nv*-?y To sav th'it our hero was perfectly un i at reeled by those remarks, wouhl he pre HUir.ing '."Hi inin li. . i... i. ? i? ? l i i muni ?ii nfvcr von ur.iiK proper,' , said Joliii. 'Anv arrangement agreeable to \i)i will In* ?- 111.?11 y ho to niu. I have great htl"**cti<>11 l*>r Mia* Muir*, and if I, can he .vi far forgiven fur my presuinp | lion, 1 may safely say, lliat to lie the i | liiihb'iu I of jour daughter I hi* moment, or at Hitv future time, would he lo me the choicest gift Heaven could he-tow.' 'Very sensible remark*,' *aid Mr. Meir* ' joyfully, 'and a* yon are obliging enough to leave lie who'e matter to my direction I I shall ay a reek from Friday, that ho- i | ing the day "ii which I had first atilici- ] piled you I Coining. 'Ibis will give Holla I am|'le time lor all necessary preparations, j and you I*-*, to apprise your father and | such oilier friends in Baltimore as rou j propose to intiie.' 'li I iinii be allowed my preference in tilt* respect,' answered our hero, glancing ( at llelia for encouragement, 'I would rather not mention it to my fadier and ! iriends until afterwards, and would thus give them an agreeable surprise. In fact, { before I saw you this morning, I had not ' even dreamed of such sudden good for* ! tun "* ' . , I i : I 1 : I 1)11 1 .'\ini wcaiucs, ami i>ena, certainly, j 'your father might not feel much like journe)ing so soon alter an attack i>f i gout. Ah f>>r mo, I would a groat ileal rather give the money awav which would he spent oil ?ucli art occasion to some of the po r families who ire starving in this city.' Nobly spoken !' cried Mr. Meirs, with enthusiasm, ami glancing at Hell* with a world of pride and affection. 'Nobly spoken, my daughter. With such pru dence aid such charitable feelings, ton will iiiV ? your cousin John a pattern wife. I heartily agree with you in (his | ! respect, and yi>u shall have it a'l your { i own wav.' Our iiero, who, in truth, independent of the charms of Iter person, had looked upon |t?)!la as somewhat frivolous, was \ equally charmed by her leinark, and, had the occasion warranted it, would have pressed a kiss ol approbation upon Iter lips. During the time which had elapsed between ibis and the dav set for the marriage of his daughter, Mr. Meirs seemed overflowing wiih good humor and enjoyment. lie made several ores- ! , enls to the poor people of his acqnair^ tance, and even gave ltella the sum of live hundred dollar*, lo lie used, if she chose, for iho same purpose. In ihe meantime, our hero was living in the greatest intimacy with liell*.? Every day they walked, rode, or sung lo gether, while ibe inon-hunt looked on, And entered into their plan* with increasing satisfaction. Al length tho long anticipated Friday arrived, and a few clioaen guests were assembled at the residence of Mr. Meirs to witneM the nuptials. John Peter* had eihaosted his last ! dollar in remunerating the tailor who had furnished liitn hie wedding coat, and by the aaaiatance of the baiber, who had trimmed kins moustache, cut and curled bia bair after the moat approved atvle, our hero w as really as fine a looking fel ' low as could be found anywhere within the , precincts of the citv ; and Mr. Nleirs ami | Holla were not a little proud of introdu- I cing liini among their aristocratic friend*. s The pastor who presided over the church with which Mr. Meirs wits connected, had already arrived, accompanied hy a c'.cri . ii cal fiiend ; while Hella, attired in a dress a of white satin, with a veil surmounted hy ; h a crown of (lowers, had just entered, resi | si ting on,the arm of the bridesmaid. IJu I ring the sensation created hy the entrance it of ihe bride, another door had opened j < and a voting man, sotuo five feet four in- ' d clie- in height, with dusty garments,^vith a red I.air, was pusiied in hy the servant, j 11 IIII'I null lllllrll ailiaZeilieill depleted (III tl his freckled, unprepossessing features, | e sank down into the nearest chad without ; il attracting any jntrtictilar observation at li the tune from the rest of the company* li Assembled, ' it As the ceremony progressed, and the ' u question was asked hy the clergyman if h any objection to tlie loins existed, lie of o the red hair ami freckled (ace rose op ' n and said, 'I olject, Mr. Clergyman, most d decided I v olject* ? 'What !' cried Mr. Meirs, springing to ) c ward and confronting the excited voting | a man of the red hair, and freckles, 'and t h who are von that dare ol ject to my I t? daughter's marriage to her cousin ? Will j li you exp ain yourself, sir ?' cried the en I p raged Mr Meirs, shaking Ins li-t in the | i face of the terrified intruder. 'Speak, or li I II htnnlle you head foremost into the h street.' j |i 'I can't, tor!' cried the proprietor of the t red hair, 'w hile you c mtinue so ex *i'ed !' s 'Then, h\ inv soul,' cried the merchant j it still more excited in h|s tone, 'I'll just . t give \ou to understand that you have no , r right to dictate in my house !' And suit j I" ing the action to the word, he se zed the I intruder l?v the shoulder and forced him j ?i out of the roi'di. ti 'Now,' cried Mr. Metrs, Hurting to the u clergyman, 'please proceed with the cere I ttioiiy.' t Agreeuldy with Mr. Meirs' request the ' n ceremony proceeded, and in less time r than it takes tts to telate it, John J'elers ! >1 and Bella were imltssolublv united in the i hotels of wedlock. i s No sooner was the ceremony over, I than Bella, clasriino her hu?lia?i.l'- 1?.I knelt In-fore her father and said, 'Forgive j us, dear father, for the deception we have . practice J upon you. This i* not cousin j John of Haliitnore.' 'Then ? lin on.lwr ilia ?oo i< he ?' criovl j " : Mr. .Meirs, glancing about the room m : ! tiie most bewildered manner. 'It is John l'viers, hut not cousin John. I , My dear husband came in the first place : ,j to you m .search of a situation, ami yon, ,, 1 forgetting their might be another J im in ? I the world besides your nephew John. v [ have innocently assisted ns in carrying ? l out the deception. Therefore, you must j , \ forgive him, dear father, for he is far less ,, | to b'ame ; you, in tbe first place, being ,, I deceived by tbe name, and we in tire ho j |, Coud place, having tiie misfortune to bo i greatly pleased with one another it was (l (juite natural for us to yield to the letnpl h ation. J ,| 'I see,' answered Mr M?irs, with much v I apparent chagrin, 'I have just had tiie honor of turning your con-ir out of doors, r which makes a compound blunder on my ,, I part. To tell you the truth, Bella. I am | more vexed at my own stupidity, than ^ with any one else. As for John Peters,' ? added Mr Meirs, in a half humorous, half sarcastic tone, 'I think I must forgive ,, bun for bis name's sake, if nothing else. < As for you, hussy, I shan't say t?? night , whether I shall forgive yon or not. It j. win tiepem: uiamiv on in>w wo succeed | in pacifying cousin John.' , 1 Suttice it to say, for the final gratifioa- ( timi of the render, 11)ht Joliu Peters of j | Baltimore, wan readi'v pacified, after a I i suitable explanation and apology fining j , tendered litin l>y lii? roiain, on the follow t 'nJ? 'Iny, and what is still further averred, I did MCliiMlly laugh over the ciionmstancea so heartily, that for a inoinenl his face grew redder than his hair. And still fur titer hv those who have a right to know, ' it has heen affirmed that John Peter*. t>( Connecticut, became not only a model husband to Bella, but a model assistant to Mr. Meirs, in all matters pertaining to business. A Bkautifi'L Skviimknt.?The late eminent Judge, Sir Allen Park, or.ce said at a public meeting in London : "We live in tlip niidsi of blessings, till we are nt terly insensible of their greatness, and the source from whence they llow. We speak of our civilization, our arts, our j freedom, our laws, and forget enlirelv how large a share is due to Christianity Blot Ohristianitv out of the psires of d man's history, and what would Ins laws s have been ) w hat bis civilization I Chris- y lianity is mixed up with our very being n and our daily life ; there i* not a familiar o object around us, which does not wear a n different aspect, because the light of Chris tl tian love is on it?not a law which does i? n? t owe its truth and gentleness to Chris- r< tianity?not a custom which cannot he n Iriu'fi) in a ll tla lisslt/ nurls lit list* ( trtzriol Kwcit and Fruit Tricks.?Two of the best f.umers North communicate the j mminer in whirl) they secure good frnil. ! It is thus ; Thev ?11<4 Rl some <1 i* lance from the body of some favorite tree until they find h root, which they cut oft'. The part disjointed from the tree is then " turned up so hs to appear above the *' ground. It send* forth shoot* the find " season, and bear, in a few years, fruit w precisely like that upon the parent tree. Let those whose trees are decaying, or who wish to increase good varieties, try si this experiment. It la bat an honr'e work. 1 o Clay's Appeal In the United Slates Senate, in Fehrury, 183t, Henry Clay concluded a peech on the slave!y question in the fo1iwing "words of wisdom "It one dark spot exists on our political orizon, is it not obscured l>v the I'riolit lid effulgent, and cheering light that earns all round us? Was ever a people a hle*sed as we are, if true to ourselves ? tl<l ever auv oilier nation eon ain within s hosoni so i:;anv elements of pro-peii; v, t " ' ' < - ? 1 . h. ^ .<>1 \ I voir (ill IV II'?l anger lies ahe nl. conspicuous, eleV i:(I visible Ii was c.early discerned at l>e commencement, ami distinctly seen lironghout our whole career. Sliall we .antonly run upon it, and destroy all lie glorious antinpuions of the Inn!: desl?V that awaits us ? I beseech the aho lioiiists themselves, solemnly to pause i their mad and la'al course. Amid the if'uit*; variety *?l objects ofhiitiiani'v and eneroleute which invite the emi !o\ men*, f their energies, let them sele?'t some one lore harmless, that does rot threaten to eluge our country in blood. "I call Upon thai small portion of the lergv, which lias lent itself to these wild ml ruinous schemes, not to forget the ho v nature of the divine mission of the under of our religion, ami to profit bv is peaceful examples. I entreat that | ortion of my country men who have given j heir countenance to abolition, to reinem ier that they are ever most loved and lotiored wh mi moving in llieir own ap iiopriite and delightful sphere; ami to 1 elb ct that the ink which tliev shed iii ub?< ril ing with llieir fair hands abolition millions, may prove but the prc'tub- to lie shedding of the blood of their breth- j en. I adjure ail the inhabitants of he roe States to rebuke and discountenance, >y their opinion and their example, men-' ires which must inevitably le ?d the Host ealam louH cowscuucnces. And '< t is all, as c?i'inlrv men, as fiiemls, am! as >rotlie|s, cbeerish in unfading inctnorv. he iiiutio which bote < nr ancestors tri itiipliantly tbroiigb all the trial? of the evolution, as, if adhered to. it vv 11! con lint I In: r posterity I lir? ?H iliat uiav 11 111?? dispensations of ho re. erved for tIt in.* Never do too much at a Time. Sir I'M win J Bu'w.r Lyiloii, in :? let? j lire recently delivered in Iviylaml, gave lie foilowip^ history of his literary h.ih Many persons seeing m? m much en faged hi active hie, and as much hImhi lie world as it [ had never heeii a sin lent, have said to uie t ' \\ lien do \on ;e? time to wiite all vour hooks T How ii earth <1 > y ou contrive to do so much fork !' I sll.il! surprise \ oil 1?v the allwe' I make I'lie answer is this, '| con* rive to do so much hv never doing too iMlch at a time. A mail to get through mrk well must not over work himself; >r if he do too much to <1 iv. tho reao ; ion of fatigue will come, and he will l>e bhc?d to do too little t" morrow. Now, ince 1 began really and earnestly to stu Iv, which was not till I left College, and ias actual y in the world, I iiisv perhaps av that I have g-.ne through us large a nurse ot general reading as most men f niv time. | have travelled much and have seel) much, I have mixed much in unities, and the various hmimss <>f life, lid in addition to all this, 1 have publish j d somewhere about sixty volumes, some jmii nuojeci* leqi.irili^ llilicli li-search.? Vi.< 1 w u a t tune do \iiii think, as a ?_ ? anal roll', 1 IttiVo devoted tosiudv ; to read no hi <I writing. N'-.t more than 11 r> o lours a day, ami when Parliament is siting, not always that. lint then, during Ik>9.1 hours, 1 have given my whole at- ! ciitiuii to what 1 was at.out.' KiU'OltTS ok Skciiktakv OK \Y \h. he rep >rl of Secretary Fiovd, without it ' ioletice, may be condensed in a few lords. 1 lie authorized strength of the Tiny is 18,105 men. all told. On the ' irst of July, lite Jute of the iust complete I eturi s. the act Hal nuuiher reached 17. IS Of this numher there tire not more | Itan 11.000 men availalde tor active setice in the Held. Ibis little force has been neaped, wnb its usual activity am) clfl ieiu V, * nee tlte date of his last report, in lie discharge of lis arduous and mnltifa ions duties, being re.jure I t-? matt about 30 permanent garrison*, posts and amps, scattered nit arcs of three millions f Milium .titles. Under these circnin tallces it has Ice 11 obviou-lv imposaih ? 0 give that ample and perfect protection | a our whole frontier which ti r* the dmv f government to afford. Indian depre aiions have been committed on our ioiithern and Mexican border, which as et have been uiicliastcd for the want of ten The Secretajv, in conclusion, speaks f the II oper's Kerry affair ?s one of the tost surprising ami startling episodes hi lie history of our conutry. John Hrown 1 termed a 'fanatical man, stimulated to Scklessiiess and desperation by the eoniant teachings ami intemperate appeals f wild and treasonable enthusiasts, mire Lrm ?*< 1 t>y (lie Constitution and laws of ie land, by the precepts of religion, <>r y the appeals ol humanity or mercy.'? 'ha r Its ton Courier. A IfclCMKDY eor AMI'S. Dip a sponffe t water, oqueMc il dry, lay it on the Itelf, sprinkle sugar on it, ami when the n??, collect. throw the sponge into hot ister. I.bwon Pit ?The juice of four lemon*, * soda crackers rolled fine, four teacups f water, three tea cups of sugar. iliirirultural. From tlio Ilural IU*gUter. Transplanting Shade Trees. As litis is the iir.?|>or season for trans* I>!:<ntino sliiol** trees, (lie following article \s ill repay a perusal : .... tiMiin .M Hicfiv ne a mora simple aiul endearing picluie of home comfort than that expression vii often quoted, of sitting in 11?? vlia.|i* (it one's own vine am) lilice. I' indicates the luxury ol" a cool re;reat ni.dt'r gteen leaves from the ardent rays of ilia summer von, and implies at tin* same lime the further prospect ill she amnion season, of wine from the vintage and frim Iron, the gathering. Hot although ihese Inxinies are eavilv altaina Me. for we |missevs she soil and climate to product) ilie vine?and in sheltered sp ii? the fig ? to perfection, yel we bill too i -re.v coiivii11 our best iit'eresis by making due |>iovisioii for tlie'rcultivalion. I; is n.a, however, upon these particular f.mis that we propose to dwell upon this o -ciiMoii j but upon what we regard as equally a desideratum, and. in respect to the picturestpte beauty ol the homestead of even tnoie importance than ei'.lier the Tine, the lig, nr anv ether fruit treo ? we allude, of course, to (.hade trees. In the Itrst place, no house in the country can I e cotisidere 1 complete!v -i part and pareel of the seenerv amnl which it stands, until it is oinhowered in foliage. I'alte for instance, a house exposed opei.lv to view on th" crest of ? t ill, or standing isolated from a I support in the innlst of iilain meadow lands?nothing can po-st blv l e uglier loan tiie appearance of such a dwelling so s-iiiticd ? nothing more bleak bu k't'g, cheeih-s alld desolate ? I'fiere is no comfoit in such a house.? The sun's r.vs boar upon it until it be come* a< liot as an .net:, and 'ho w r winds tank it and pelietral* lliroug . into ever; mark and cranny until, were it not for I lazing fires nn-l double llie amount of fuel which is required for holts es CosiiV sla ltele l In trees and si.rubbers the col l would be unieamble. Now gather around the house on the Itnl it close !? -Jl i>f tr<-cs and slit uhherv on it* 'ortli and n.>rtheis'.-rn e.xp sine, keep tin1 vii-w well ojic-n <'ii tlio sou'h, but l>r?*:?k uij the plant anitace ltete and there with hi .lif iy litopi!?? () irroiipiiiiK nf and ahinhs, Hint Met have shade tnr \out hott-e m Mimuu-r, and shelti r fur vout !ii;;-m ui winter, and hen'I IV ill nil sen ( sum. N ?, ;n r!i' ?it:" shade trees, those on v, . - * ui'iu'i i. i ill**! .-hull!.I bu selected whi.'ll It'll" lint property of 11hi.st>!hiii injj i'HsiIv. I'.uir of our native trees tuny >?l wu\- !> depended upon, f'-r thev wit! ?l 11 isi ;ilw"?? i thrive, even under such rotioli us ..or hs would ili'-triiV trees h?s herds', llose f.iur HIV the ins pie, the c'der, the willow, mill the loitusl. liill, lifter nil, the 1 test tiling to do, is nut to tru-l to the tr ll:s| '.;il.ti! ^ of trees flOHl W.iu.ls Mi l lieiio.: r.uis, hut to Select such Hs hilie heefi : i s.-.l in h nursery, ati.l whose V"iitiu routs, l?v frequent. retituvHls or by const ant trininiiinr, have thrown nut hii nhu.idai.ce of lit.n s. If. however, circuit, sintieis render it desirable to hue trees from the woo ls, w.th tune and patience the transplanting ?'| these can be safely and certainly eth-cted?though in the courrc of lite next ten years, the small tree troiu the nursery, an inch and a hall tit diameter, will outstrip in height and beauts the treu which, when taken flOill the woods, was,six inches tn diameter.? 1? II I! tree* MTU In he from the wood*, hare is the hest inehod of doing it : Aroiiml the tree, ??t the distance <> lour feet fr .in the trunk, dig a circular trench two feet deep, culling and removing ait the interposing roots. Kaplan the earth, and in a sii??rt tune a tun litiidi >l new fibres wnl lie thrown out into (lit loosened soil. 1 11.; following vest tin tree mat he transplanted to any situation where it may he required. Another nctf.lt .>d is to dig a riieul.tr treneti four tee from the hodv of the fee and tliiee fi-e deep, cutting the earth well away fron under the bottom, until the whole tn.s tests upon a pivot. This should he doni either early or la'ft in winter. I.e' tin mass of earth Hand until it is well fr. zer through, and then transplant the tree with the fr. i.-n hill at'ached, wherever il 's designed ilist :l shall grow in future lhit. after all, there will he more satisfac lorn derived, in tlio long run, from tree drawn from the nursery, than from tree of a much larger size derived from tin woods. A skilf.il plaurer. of course, cm make almost any tree grow ; hut then are very few farmeis or conntrc tr..i,il? ^ "%*v men who elaiin to luive inoeh knowledgi with regard to the transplanting of tree* or we should have fewer occnc ions to coin plain of the bleak appearance of our coim try cottages and farm houses and the cv idenc- s of a want of tnste in tlieir sur rounding*. In planting shade trees, evet those which are taken from a nursery and theief.ire young, thr'lv, and wel rooted, it i* not sufficient to merely 'tlij a hole, tlirust in the tree, and leave thi re*t to nature.' The better a tree islrea ted iu the beginning, the more certainlt it will repay the oh'igalinn Dig even hole ihree teet wide and two feet deep lei the soil wiih which ii is to he filled he rich and finely pulverised. Do no plant the tree an\ deeper than it stood i stood in the nursery; stake it securelt when it is planted, and to preserve i against drought, cover i' with C"?r?< manure and refuse stiaw as a mulch ing. ihkiumui'j. When ill news comes too late to be 1 serviceable to your neighbour, keep it to yourself. The room where the matrimonial liar1 noss is kept is in<lee<l ?he "bliule* chamber." , ^ ? What is the d tl'erenoc between a man who keeps dogs, and who h ts nm? walklingst'cks ? One owr.s ca nines and the | odier nine canes. 'What are yon l.wikin/ after : rr.r dear ?' said i verv affectionate mother to Iter daughter. The daughter looked a round am) replied, 'looking after a son inlaw for father.' ' Wife, ahull we ea'l the baby Judas !' ' lloirihle ! Judas denied his mauler.' 1 Well then, call him J iscph.' 'Just as had?lie denied his mistress.' Cnffy says he'd rather die in s railroad smash up, than in a steamboat burst up, f. r this reason : "If you gits run off" de track and smash up, dor you is; but if you gits blowed up on de boat whar is you ?' Mv dear madam,' said a doctor to his patient, 'I am truly gratified to see you i vet in life. At mv last visit yesterday, 1 ? on k o.w that I tool you you had but sixteen hours to live.' 'Yes, doctor, you did, b it I did not take the dose you left me.' Well, farmer, you told its your place was a good place for hunting ; now we have trampted it for three hours and found no game.'?'Just so. I calculate, as u nl think, the less gatne there is, the more limiting vou have.' 'Pray, mv lord,' said h gentleman, to a rather whimsical judge, 'what is the dis, unction between L tw and Equity Courts ?' , 'Very little in the end,' replied his loidi sliip ; 'tliey only differ so hir hb time is i eoncerned. At common Law vou are i done I t at once ; in Equity you are not so easily disposed of; the one is prussic acid, tlie other ia laudanum.' ' Don't you think,* said a brother lawr yei to Judge Underwood, of Georgia, 'ilia* Jim Piersoti is ihe greatest liar of a lawyer that you ever saw ?' ' I should l?e sorry to say that of Urothers pierson,' replied the judge; 'but ' lie i? cerininly more economical of the truth than any other lawyer on the circuit.' The other day, a fashionable young lady entered a dry goods 6tof6, and, while making a purchase, a beautiful cat purred and londled round her. 'Oh, t what ft dear creature.' observed the young lady. 'How I would like to have her. Isn't it a hnndsoine chi ? \\'h?r (In von call it V 'It has not been chris tened yet,' responded the salesman. 'Oh, dear, why don't } oil on 11 it Julia'?that , bein;* Iter own pitronyrnic. 4Well, I would, with the greatest pleasure, miss ; , but, unfortunately, it is not one of that kind.' No Relations.? A General in the Russian service having a very long Polish name, the Emperor asked him, I good humoredly : ; ' l'rav. General, what is your name 1' f 'I he General repeated to him the whole name, thus?Ablampakcusslop witch. 3 4 Why,' said the Emperor, 'the devil j i himself never had sucn a name.' ) 4 I should presume not, Sir.' replied s the General, Tor he is no relation of i mine.' Too Quick ?For all that thi* world ^ is a 'thorny w aste,' it seems some good men aia not in h iutrrv to leave it. The Rev. John Skinner, of Linshart, Longside while passing nlong h street in the vib 5 lage. whs irei l>v an old woman who ' was in tln? habit of begging. As was ' !i r practice, she made a solicitation for a half penny. On feeling in his pocket, Mr. Skinner discovered that he had not a half pennv, hoi whs possessed of a penny piece, which he handed to her. The sum s being double what was expected, so ex cited, bcr grattilude that she exclaimed. 'Lord ble?*s you, sir, snd may much good attend your f>imily through Irto.? And as for yourself, may God take you to tnur resting place this very night.' ' 'Thank you. madam, for your good wishes,' said Mr. Skinner, 'but vou need not have been so very particular about the nine' , A man who had been elected major of | militia, and who was not overburdened l with brains, took it into his head, on the * morning of the parade to 'exercise' a little by liimself. The field selected for the j purpose whs his own apartment. Placing ; himself in a mflitary attitude, with his ; gworcl drawn, fie.exclaimed? Attention company ! Roar rank, three i pace* march P and he tumbled down into t tlie cellar. Hi# wife, hearing tlie racket, , cniim running in, saying : t ' My dear, have you kilted yourself!' j -Go about your hneineae, womam,' ?auj 1 the hero, 'what do vou know about ' war I'