University of South Carolina Libraries
El DOLBY'S TALKS Her Attempt at Suicide Again a Failure. ?VANTS DEACON TO EXPLAIN. Mrs. D. Could Not Forget Hubby's Dis graceful Condition on the Fourth of July-Smell of Sassafras' on HI? Breath Could Not Deceive Her. By M. QUAD. ICopyrlght, 19C9, by Associated Literary PressiJ WHEN Deacon Dolby started for the grocery with the oil can the other evening Mrs. Dolby had got a pair of his r> trousers In hand and was preparing to sew on a generous patch where it would do the most good and at the same time was in happy spirits. When he returned the trousers and patch lay on the floor, the lamp was turned low -down, and he heard a low moaning Xf?m the bedroom off the family room. ' .Some deacons and husbands would have rushed in to inquire of the wife lying on the bed in disheveled attitude what had happened. But Deacon Dol- i "rOU WERE INTOXICATED, SAMUEL. " by didn't. , He turned up the lamp, ! kicked off bis shoes with a grunt of satisfaction and then opened a letter j he had received at the postoffice. It ! was from his brother Henry, in In diana. As be opened it more moans i and groans reached his ears. Brother Henry was well. He took ! his pen in hand to say that he was ! and to hope that these few lines will ! find you the same. Deacon Dolby was gratified. He had carried a sneaking idea that bis brother Henry bad been dead and buried for the last five years. Sighs from the bedroom. Groans from the bedroom. Long drawn moans from the bedroom. . They would have quite interested some mea. Henry's wife was also ?gili ?iso his see tnai he saw. It was ont pf the tail of bis eye. Henry said in his let ter that money was tight in Indiana. He meant by that Indiana money was intoxicated, and the deacon'didn't get tilings mixed up. ^ *'.'Samuel Dolby!" it. was the ghost speaking. The deacon heard it. but never turned a hair. Henry was informing him that he feared cholera had broken out among his hogs, but wasn't sure. It might be whooping cough or chicken pox. . Demands Account From Deacon. "Deacon Dolby, I am here, and I want you to give an account of your self. - 1 went in to lay down on' the bed to die. but 1 heard yon come borne and thought 1 would put it off for. a few minutes. Mrs. H Inchma n was here while you were away." Mrs. Dolby put an exclamation point after the announcement and watched to detect a guilty start but none start ed. -The deacon was carved of stone. Henry wrote that he had heard, but didn't know how true it was, that a man in Indiana bad been arrested.for having three wives. . "Samuel Dolby, OD the night of last Fourth of July you went downtown to see the fireworks. You didn't 'want me to go for fear I'd be hit by a Ro man candle. When you came borne you tried for ten minutes to open the gate the wrong way. Don't deny it, for I was watching you." The smile that flitted over the dea con's face bad nothing to do with last Fourth of July. Henry had. written that they had got a way in Indiana* of sticking the shingles ott a barn with wax? Saved shingle nolls and lasted longer; cows couldn't kick 'em off or co?t?, chew 'em off. "And you stumbled into the kitchen and fell flat.on the floor and rolled over on your back, and when I wept over you and asked if yon were dying all the answer I could get was, 'Whazzer mazzer-whazzer matzer? Samuel Dolby, look your wife in the eye!" Samuel Dolby didn't do any such thing. He continued to look at Hen ry's letter. Henry wrote that he had enjoyed two large bolls on bis left legMuring the month of September, but by being extra good in his conduct had escaped the grave. "I smelt of your breath, and it smelt of sassafras. Samuel Dolby, Notice to Stock, Raisers. MY handsome saddle brod Stallion Dandy -Denmark will make the sprinc:season at my farm near Clark's Hill. Terms $15.00 to it sure living colt; will use all care wdth mares sent, but not responsi ble for accidents. J.H. GARRETT. Clark's HUI, S. C. * you had taken to sassafras to deceive your poor, confiding wife after you had taken to beer. You are as guilty :8BVHf?5an?an ?r Hyman or whoever ?te??{tsjffit?^ hiing Sd high.' and the end "bijis come." Ton were intoxicated, . Samuel-you, a moral example for the "t?wja'?f Pe^rbpro! I never suspected it, o'.Ting io the sassafras. 1. thought you had been bunted by a rocket, and I've gone night along thanking Prov idence for saving your life. But the truth is out now. Deceiver!" The deacon started a start, but sup pressed it and cracked his toes under the table. Having taken bis pen in hand. Henry wrote that one of his neighbor's cows had dropped dead in a fit a few days ago. He spelled it fltt, but the deacon obligingly took a "t*?. off In the^ reading. "Right along from the Fourth of July until this night. Samuel Dolby, you haye been deceiving me! 1 have told the neighbors that you might haye been struck by lightning or that it might have been a weak h?rt or that you saw a ghost as you came by the old sawmill I have told them this, and yet they knew the true cause all the time. Oh, Samuel, how could you do it! How could you go into Sny der's and call for the beer and whoop about our licking the British and get ting ? Fourth ?r July!" Puts Him to Shame. The deacon felt -waves of patriotism sweeping'dyer bini at the remem brance, but he hung on to himself. He also remembered how cool and nice that beer tasted, but he dared not lick his lips. "And the shame of it, Samuel, has driv me tb my grave, i can't hold up my head ag'ln it. I s'pose you'll be come a pirate or something, but I can't help that They'll all under stand why 1 committed suicide, and they'll all pity me. It won't do you any good to fall on your knees and shed tears and ask me to forgive you." The deacon didn't fall or shed. Henry wrote that he kinder suspected that turnips would go to 40 cents a bushel before winter set in. but be might be mistaken. "Samuel, we have a smokehouse. We have a ham in there-smoking. 1 am going out there and shut myself in with the ham until I smother to death. I have always felt that I'd like to look putty after death, but I don't care now. If 1 look like a smoked ham you'll have to put up with it. I guess It'll wash off when I get up to heaven. Samuel, farewell:" It was a mournful word, bul Samuel was game. He choked back his emo tions, swallowed the pumpkin seed he was holding in his mom li for rheuma tism and let his poor wife go to her smoking doom. He also read from thc letter that Henry thought it was go ing to bc a bard wiurer. Ile couldu't tell why he thought so. but he did, and, so thinking, be thought he'd men tion it. Five minutes passed away. Mrs. Dolby must be smoking by this time. Ten minutes passed. She must bc sneezing and gasping. Fifteen minutes. She must be tak - -He cerrnrsayr "After I got out there 1 thought it would be easier to jump out of a win der tomorrow. PH wait." And fifteen minutes later they were both sound asleep and the crickets singing as joyously as ever. Pat's Idea. They were talking about the compen sations of nature in making the left side stronger if the right is paralyzed, the right eye keener if the left is blind, and so on. "Sure, thafs right." said Pat. "I knew a man with one short leg, and, faith, the' other was longer."-Ba Iti njnrp A m<?rlf.qn Valuable Farm For Sale As I expect to leave Edgefield, I hereby offer my plantation for sale. Will sell as a. whole or cut into tracts. Six room cottage, large barn, stables, 15-acre orchard of peaches, apples, cherries, plums.' pears and grapes, 5 to 7 years old Six acres choice pecan trees, 6 years old. This place in 3 miles of Edgefield. All or part cash, to suit buyer. J. H. Cantelou Edgefield, S. C. The Edgefield County Teachers* Summer School. Edgefield County is to. have a Teacher's Summer School, same to begin Wednesday, the first day of June, and continue for 4 weeks. The County Board considers it self fortunate in securing the ser vices of Prof. J. F. Entzminger, Maj. Thos. J. Lyon and Capt. P. P. Burns, all specialists in their respec tive departments. These gentle men will give special attention to subjects required for examination for teachers certificates. We urge every white teacher in the county to arrange to attend. In formation in regard,to board, etc., can be obtained by writing Prof. J. F. Entzminger. A. R. NICHOLSON, Co. Supt. of Education. Cleaning and Pressing I respctf olly notify the Edge field public that I have moved my dying, cleaning and pressing room to the ground floor of the Corner Store's annex, and solicit a contin uance of your patronage. We guar intee satisfaction on every piece of rork we send out. Wallace Harris. ANK 0 EDGEFIELD, S C. State and County Depositor* DIRECTORS J, C. SHEPPARD, W. W. ADAMS, J. H. BOUKNIGKT, T. H. RAIXSFOR, J, M. COBB, B. E. NICHOLSON A. S. TOMPKINS, C. C. FULLER W. E. PRESCOTT. OFFICERS. J. C. SHEPPARD, President. ; VV. W. ADAMS. vice-President. E. J. MIMS, Cashier. J. Ii. ALLEN, Ass't. Cashier. Pays interest on deposits bj special contract. Money to loan on liberal terms. Prompt and polite attention to business. YOUR Account Solicited Dr. F. L. PARKER, Dentist, Johnston, --SC Over Bank of Johnston. NOTICE. My business will compel me to be away from Edgefield for awhile and I will leave my accounts at my old stand and any of the fol lo wir jr par ties are authorized to receipt for same. Messrs. S. A. Branson and A. M. Parks and Miss A. Schenk. . Respectfullv, J. E. Hart. LAUNDRY NOTICE. Our Steam Laundry work will go on as formerly and will ask our old patrons to leave work at my old stand._wJb.ere_Messrs. Abney '*arks animation for Kdgetield county will be held in the court house on Fri day, May 6th, by order of the State Board of Education. This exami nation will be for both white and colored teachers. A. R, NICHOLSON, Supt. Ed. E. Ce. * Better Than Lard. Wesson's pure cotton seed oil is a cooking substitute for lard and butter. No greasy food, no dyspep sia. Odorless and tasteless. Benefits I eal th, pocket-book and domestic atmosphere. Try a can and you will always use it-only 25 cents. Penn & Holstein. JAS. S. BYRD, SURGEON DENTIST, EDGEFIELD, S. C. ?JF"Office over Post-Office. Sheriffs Sale. STATE OF SOUTH CAROLINA, COUNTY OF EDGEFIELD. Mrs. M. Kate Mims Plaintiff Execution-vs. J. L. Mims as Administrator of the Estate of H. A. Mims, Dec'd. By virtue of an Execution to m directed in the above stated cause I will proceed to sell at Edgefield, C. H., S. C., on the first Monda.\ in May next (being second day p said month) at eleven o'clock a. m. the following property to wit: One-fifth of two-thirds interest in house and lot in the town of Edgefield S. C., bounded as fol lows; north by Simkins street; eas' by Johnson street; south by Mail street, and west by B. B. Jone: Levied upon as the property of th above named H. A. Mims, dee'd. Terras Cash. Titles Evtra. W. G. OUZTS, S. E. C. April 8, 1910. James A. Dobey, DENTAL SURGEON, Johnston, S. C. Office over Farmers Bank Building Full supply of Glenn Springs and Harris Lithia water. Penn & Holstein. For unty GROWERS Encouraged bvtlie success *of last year's corn contest and in order to give additional stimulus to the production of corn in the county, The Advertiser will conduct another corn contest this year. First Prize Fifteen dollars in Gold Coin will be given the Edgefield county farmer who grows the greatest number of bushels of corn on one acre of land during the vear 1910 Q&in^md Prim . Ten (lollars in Gol(1 IM? OeCOJlU I rlZe. will be giyen the farm er in Edgefield county who grows the second largest number of bushels of corn on one acre during the year 1910. The foregoing prizes are offered unconditionally and "without embarass irg or complicated restrictions. The contestants can plant their corn when they please, fertilize it as they plca3e and cultivate it by whatever system they please. Only one requirement is made: the as?e must be in one continuous plot of ground and not composed of two or more rich spots selected from different parts of the farm. The ar^a planted must NOT be LESS than one re. vVho'll Win the Gold this Year? Prizes will be awarded ai the County Fair 1 OU KU OU ?U 1CU1C1UUC1 ? lld? uuj ing- any one of the dozen following: articles that I save you money on Kerosene Oil Gasoline Machine Oil Dry Cell Batteries Shingles ck Lime Cernent Lumber Cotton Seed C. S. Hulls C. S. Meal I solicit your patron age. Send, Come or Phone me. Phone No. 10. .E S. JOHNSON. We are headquarters for seed Irish potatoes, Early Rose, Bliss, Irish Cobbler and Green Mountain. Ours will insure a groorT yield. B. Timmons. JUST PUBLISHED Webster's NEW INTERNATIONAL Dictionary, (G. & C. Merriam Co., Springfield, Mass.) surpasses the old International as much as that book exceeded its predecenor. On the old f cinndation a new superstructure has been built. The reconstruction has been carried on through many years by a large force of trained workers, under the supervision of Dr. W, T. Harris, former United States Commissioner of Educa tion, and reenforced by many eminent special ists. The definitions have been rearranged and amplified. The number of terms defined has bren more than doubled. The etymology, synonyms, pronunciation, have received un sparing scholarly labor. The language of English literature for over seven centuries, i !:c j terminology of the arts and sciences, and thc jj et cr>--day speech of street, shop, and house held, are presented with fullness and clcarec::. : In size of vocabulary, in richness of gencr;.: information, and in convenience of consulta tion, the book sets a new mark in lexicography. , 400,000 words and phrases. 6000 illustrations. 2700 pages. Write ta the pubtiihers for Specimen Pazcs. mmras Spring IS HERE The season is here for discarding heavy toggery and donning the Spring and summer weights. We have never been better prepared to clothe, shoe and hat you than now. Everything new and first class-right from the cen ters of fashion. See our nobby spring suits, new hats in straw or felt. Stylish neckwear, Stylish Oxfords and shoes Hoisery and underwear. DORN & MUMS Surveying. Having obtained sur veying outfit,I tender my services to the public. J. H. Cantelou, Sur\e> or. i IM MO fl s & COR LL Y, SURGEON DENTISTS, Appointments at Trenton ->n Wednesdays. fl rown a vii Rridfp Work a Sre<-ia For Sale. Pony suitable for a child, at a argain. J. H. Cantelon. R.C. Neely R. C. Neely, Jr. S. H. Wilcox NEELEY& WILCOX Cotton Factors 741 Reynolds St*, Augusta, Ga,, Advances made to Merchants and Farmers. Call on us, or write us $loo?Oo0.oo To loan on improved farm lands. Five years in which to repay. No companj-no red tape. 17 years in the farm mortgage business ex clusively JAMES FRANK & SON Augusta, Ga