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Gladdening a Humorist. The financial burden which Mark Twain carnied some years ago weighed on his mind, heavily. In those mo ments of despondency there was one tactful friend who could make the bu . morist forget his troubles. This was Dan Beard, the-artist who illustrated some of Twain's books. "Dan Beard, there is no tonic * *iat can equal the company of a cheerful man," said the humorist as Ste entered the artist's studio. \ "Ah, but I have such a pleasant sub ject to work upon that I am not In need of either man or tonic for my cheerfulness," retorted the artist. "Beg pardon; it Is I that need the \ tonic, and that is why I nm. here," said Twain forlornly. "Thelf allow me to prescribe a dose of your own medicine." And Mark was handed a copy of his book which Beard had been studying.. "I thank you," replied the humorist. "It took me a year to get that medi cine out of my system, anti-1 do not propose to imbibe it again." Aidiscussion of the book was fol lowed by a hearty dinner,, and Twain left his friend, having received the cheer that he needed. The Alligator's Tongue. On one occasion when traveling along the west coast of Africa with an old skipper who bad known many missionaries, but "did uot see the use of them,". Bishop Taylor-Smith was obliged to endure a string of taunting questions, such as "What was the good of spouting at Exeter hall?' and "What did missionaries know, any way?' At last the bishop could stand it no longer. Turning to the skipper, he said: "I know you are an expert Can you tell me the length of an alligator's tongue?' "Certainly," was the reply, "but it depends on the length of the alligat or." "Very well, then; given an alligator fifteen, feet long, what would be the length of its tongue?' - "Three feet" was the answer. But the bishop, who bad kept alli gators and watched their ways, knew better. "It is evident that you are an authority on the west coast of Africa." he said, "but it is also evident that some people see more In ten minutes ~~ than others in twenty years. Let me tell you that an alligator has no tongue." Declined the Job. A writer of cheap fiction relates a trick played on him by a collaborator ; In the days when dime novels were langer than they are now. and the compensation made it worth while for two men to write one "story between them. After bis partner bad finished the first chapter of their initial col laboration it was .handed over with the following announcement: "There, I've just thrown the hero over a thousand foot cliff and told the reader that nothing could prevent the lad from, falling to death on the rocks below. It Is up to you to save tba boy." The other writer said nothing, but sat down and wrote furiously for in boar. Then he quietly handed the manuscript back. A glance at the second chapter showed the funny man that his friend had completely ignored the events in the first part of the story, introduced a new set of char acters and left the hero still banging over the cliff, waiting to be rescued by bis ?reator.-New York Sun. r Poetry Didn't Save Them. A New York prisoner accused of ' drunkenness who pleaded his case in rhyme before a magistrate got a sen tence of six months on "the island," for, as the judge remarked, bis "jag" was Dad enough, but bis poetry was worse. Over In London a "plain drunk" put forth this: Tve been drinking wine that is drawn from the wood; No bottle rubbish, but sparkling and good. But it got in my bead, so my friends all explain That the wine has gone back to the wood once again. The effusion and the celebration cost bim 10 shillings.-New Yolk Tribune. College Sentiment - Dr. Blank, about twenty years a professor in a certain college, was on the eve of a trip to Europe, to be ab sent two years. In pathetic and rath er harrowing tones he made his fare well address to 's class: "Yes, 1 am about to part with you This Is more than distressing to me. Would that there was a window in my breast, my dear boys, that you might see the innermost recesses of my heart" A stripling in the rear, seized with a happy thought, shouted: "Professor, would a pane in the stomach do?'-LIppIncott's. Unusual Luck. "So you've rented that haunted house which was on your bands so long?' "Yes; rented It to on actor." ?Did he find out its reputation?' ? "That's the very thing which de cided him to take the house." "Bather surprising!-' "He said it would be such a comfort for him to get inside of a bouse where the ghost walked every night."-Balti more American. Mrs. Malaprop "You mustn't think you ought to run around barefooted. Johnny," said Mrs. Lapsling chidingly, "just because Bob by Stapleton! does. He's no centurion to gb by."-Cassell's Journal. Engagement Broken. Merchant-I have had hard luck iest all my money. Suitor-Surely you would not wish to lose your daughter also.-Fliegende Blatter. . A" .. ? .? ? . The Call of the Blood. for purification, finds voice in pimples, boils, sallow complexion, a jaundiced look, moth patches and blotches on the skin-all signs of liver trouble. But Dr. King's Kew Life Pills make rich red blood; t. ive olear skin, rosy cheeks, fine corni ex ion, health. Try them. 25c at W E Lynch, <fc Co., Penn df( Ho]ste?int | NOTICE OF ELECTION. Flat Rock school district No. 4. Special tax. Pursuant to an order of the county board of education, an election will be held at Flat Rock school honse, in the county of Edge field, state of South Carolina, on Saturday, tr 9 30th day of April. 191Q, for tne purpose of voting on the question of levying and collect ing a special tax of three (s) mill* on the dollar of the taxable property of Flat Rock school district No. 4. In holding said election the terms of the above older of the count.\ board of education will be strictly enforced. J. W. Bailey, O. O. Timmerman, W. E. Bash. Board of trustees of b lat Rock school district, No. 4, Ed gefield Co s.e. State of South Carolina, County of Edgefield. Whereas therehas been fiied witi the county board of education o Edgefield county, S. C. a pelitioi of more than one-third of the rest clent electors and a like proportio: of the resident free holders of tht age of 21 years of the Flat Roc!?, school district No. 4. in the county and state aforesaid asking an ?lec tion in said district for the purpose of voting upon the question of levy ing and collecting a special tax of three mills on the dollar of all taxa ble property of said district to sup pie ment the school fund of said dis trict. It is orderedsthat O. 0. Timmer man, J. W. Bailey and \V. E. Bush board of trustees of said school dis trict are hereby ordered to hold an election at Flat Rock school house in said district on the 30th day of April, A. D. 1910, after giving no tice of the time and place of said election in some newspaper publish ed'within the said county and by posting notices thereof in at least three public places in the said dis trio and two weeks before the said e.ecttion At this election only such election as return real or personal property for taxation and who ex- J hibit their tax receipt? and registra tion certificates as required in gen eral elections shall be allowed tc vote. The board of trustees shall ad as managers and the election shall be conducted as provided by law for general elections. At said elec tion each elector favoring thc pro posed levy shall cast a ballot con taining the word '^Yes? printed oi written thereon and each elector oj - j po?fcd to said levy shall cast a bal lot containing the word '*No" print ed or written.thereon. Within 10 j days after such election, if majori ty of those voting shall vote for such levy, the board of trustees shall furnish the, county auditor -with'a statement of the amount so levied. The polls shall open at eight o'clock, a.. m., and close at 4 o'clock p. m. j and in ali respects comply with sec tion 1208 of the code of laws of] South Carotina, 1902, vol. 1. A. R. Nicholson, Sgpt. G. F. Long, Jr. , Edwin',H. Folk. County board of education of Edge-] Lfield county, S. C. Summons.' STATE OF SOUTH CAROLINA, j COUNTY OF EDGEFIELD, Court of Common Pleas. Alma Hammond-Plaintiff against -W. G. Hammond, Charles T. Hammond, Andrew R. Hammond, and Jewell Hammond, and L. R. Hammond-as Administrator of v the Personal Estate of C. T. Hammond--dee'd. --Defendan ts. Summons for Relief ' (Complaint not Served.) j To the Defendants above named: You are hereby summoned,, and required to answer the complaint in this action, which is filed in the office of the Clerk of the Court of | Common Pleas, for the said Coun ty, and to serve a copy of your an swer to the said complaint on the subscribers at their office, at Edge field South Carolina, within twenty days after the service hereof, exclu sive of the day of such service: and if you fail to answer the complaint | within the time aforesaid, the plain tiff in this action will apply to the Court for the relief demanded io the complaint. Dated April 5th 191 u. Test- VY. B. Cogburn, [Seal] Clerk C. C. P. & G. S. SHEPPARD BROS., Plaintiffs Att'ys. To W. G. Hammond-Non-Resi dent: You will take notice that the origi nal Summons and Complaint in the above stated action, are on file in the office of the Clerk of I the Court of Common.Pleas, and General Sessions, in and for the j County snd State aforesaid. SHEPPARD BROS. Plaintiff's Attorneys. April 5th, 1910. Worse Than Bullets. Bullets hav-e often caused less? suffering to soldiers than the eczema L W Harriraan, Burlington, Me., got in the army and suffered with, forty years. But Bucklen's Arnica Salve cured me when all else failed, he writes Greatest healer for sores, ulcers, boils, burns, nuts wpj^H. bruises and piles. 25c Lynch & Co., Penn ?fe H< Announcements. | House of Representatives. j I respectfully announce myself a can I didate for re-election to the House of Representatives, pledging myself to abide the result of the Democratic i primary and to support the nominees I of the same. v ? " S. McG. SIMKINS. I respectfully announce that I am candidate for re-election to the House of ' .Representatives ?rom Edgefiela county and pledge myself to abide by che ruies and regulations of the Demo cratic party. M. P. WELLS. Superintendent of Education. ? hereby announce myself a candi date for re-election to the office 01 Superintendent of Education of Edge field county, subject to the rules'of thc Jemocratic primary, and solicit the support of the voters of Edgefield county. If elected, I pledge myself to i consc ientious discharge of the duties of the office. , A. R. NICHOLSON. I am candidate for Superintendent of ?du caf on, sub jct to rules and regula tions of Democratic Primaries. I have taught about ten y v ars in the public schools, am deeply interested in them, and feel that I am familiar with their j leeds. If elected, I pledge an earnest discharge of the duties of the office. W. WALTON FULLER. Judge of Probate. Thanking the voters of this :. County for their support in the past, I offerioi re-election to the Office of Judge o. Probate of Edgefield County, subject .o the rules and regulations of tht Democratic Primary. J. D. ALLEN. County Treasurer. I hereby announce myself a candi?' date for Treasurer of Edgefield Count} subject to the rules of the Democratic Earty. If elected 7 pledge my besfref ?rt to give the pecple a1 satisfactory administration. THOMAS E. BYRD. I herewith respectfully announce myself for election to the office o. Treasurer of Edgefield county, trusting that my past record in said position will warrant the support of all Demo cratic voters, and am pledged to abidi by all rules and regulations of \ tht August primary. JAMES T. MIMS. I hereby announce myself a' candi-j date for the office of Treasurer ol Edgefield County, subject to the rule* and regulations of the Democratic pri mary, pledging myself, if elected, to serve the people to the best of my ability. C. M. WILLIAMS. For Auditor. I respectfully announce myself a can didate for re-election to the office ol Auditor of Edgefield county and solicit the support of the people, pledging my-f aelf to abide the result of the -Deica? eratic primary. _ . J. RANSOM T?MMERMA*?. County Supervisor. I respectfully annouuee that I am a candidate for re-election to the office of Supervisor1 of Edgefield County sub ject to the rules of the Democratic pri mary, and pledge myself if elected to continue to discharge the duties of said office with the same faithfulness and fidelity that I have in the past. R. J. MOULTRIE. I hereby announce myself for the of-j fice of Supervisor of Edgefield county, and pledge my friends and the people as a whole, faithful and competent service. I know the work of the office thoroughly, and solicit your support, promising to abide by the result of the j Democratic party. WILEY G. WELLS. I hereby announce myself a candi date for the office of Supervisor of Edgefield county and solicit the sup port of the people, pledging myself to abide the result of the primary elec tion. J. W. CRIM. For Magistrate. I respectfully announce my candida cy for re-election to the office of magis trate of the 5th judicial district of F^gefield county subject to the Demo cratic primary. Will endeavorif elec ted to do my full duty in future as I have in the past. JOHN R. BLACKWELL.' I respectfully announce myself a can didate for the office of magistrate of the 6th Judicial District of* Edgefield County, suuject to the rules of the Democratic party, pledging myself to a faithful discharge of duty if elected. R. M. JOHNSON. I respectfully announce myself a can didate for re-election to the office of Magistrate for the 8th judicial district of Edgefield county, pledging myself to abide the re3ult of the Democratic pri mary. A. C. OUZTS. I respectfully announce myself a candidate for re-election as Magistrate of the 4th judicial district of Edge field county, pledging myself to abide the result of the Democratic primary election. WALTER W. MILLER. I respectfully announce myself a can didate for magistrate of the 8th judi cial district of Edgefield county subject to the rules and regulations of the Democratic party. If the people see fit to elect me I will render faithful service. T. J. MCDOWELL. We hereby announce Mr. J. V/. Bai ley a candidate for magistrate of the 6th judicial district of Edgefield county pledging him to abide the result of the ^primary election and to support the nominees of the Democratic party. FRIENDS AND NEIGHBORS. I respectfully announce myself a candidate for magistrate of the 8th judicial district of Edgefield county, subject to the rules and regulations of the Democratic primary If elected, I will do my best to give a satisfactory administration. J. H. C. TIMMERMAN I hereby announce myself a candidate for magistrate of the 1st Judicial dis trict of Edgefield county, pledging my self to abide the result of the Demo eratic primary N. L. BRUNSONf I respectfully announce inyseli candidate for magistrate of the 8th ju- j dicial district ox jCidgeneid county and pledge myself to abide the result ol' the Democratic primary. If elected, will .render faithful service. W. J. AaAMS. I respectfully announce myself a can didate for magistrate of t?e bth judi cial district of Edgefield county, pledg ing myself to abide the result of the Democratic primary and to discharge my duty faithfully if elected. * W. E. TURNER. I hereby announce myself a candi date for magistrate of the 2nd judicial district, pledging myself to abide the result of the Democratic primary. N WALLACE W. WISE. County Commissioner. I am before the people as a candi date for County Commissioner, subject to the rules of the Democratic party. if elected, I shall look to the beat in terests of the people and of the county. N. L. BROADWATER. I hereby announce to the voters of j ridgefield county that I ara a candidate xor re-election to the office of County Jommisaioner subject to the regulations j of the Democratic primary. I pledge .nyself, if elected, to honest service, safeguarding the p?ople's interest in every possible way.?? JNO. 0. HERTN. I hereby announce that I am a can didate for the office of County Com missioner aud pledge myself to abide "che result of the Democratic primary. JAMES DEVORE. I hereby announce that I am a can didate for re-election to the office of Jounty Commissioner of Edgefield county, pledging myself to abide the result ot the primary election and to support the nominees of the Democrat ic primary. J. NICK GRIFFIS For Coroner. Through the solicitation of my friends, -frannoUnce myself a candidate for the office of Coroner, subject to the Demo cratic primary, soliciting the support >? the people, j pip H. SEIGLER. S pervisor of Registration ? I hereby announce myself a candi iate for re-election to the office of Supervisor of Registration and pr edge gayself-to abide the result of the Demo cratic primary and to support the nom inees of the same. : G. G. WEST. ? ' . ?-. ' . I hereby announce myself a candi date |6r. Supervisor of Registration iubject to the rules of the Democratic party, and solicit the support o? the beople.* C. H. WHATLEY. I jl? .herewith respectfully "announce nyself a candidate for re-tlection for .supervisor of Registration of Eo^e iiefd county, pledging myself to abiae the resnlt of the primary election and to support the nominees of the party. GEORGE W. QUARLES. I respectfully announce. myself a candidate for ?Supervisor of Registra tion and pledge myself to abide the re sult of the Democratic primary. As I must stay at my post, making meal for the people, will be unable to make a complete canvass. : ?N. R. BARTLEY. *._ - ' 21 resp ectfully announce myself a candidate for reselect^r. to the office of Supervisor of7 Registration, and pledge myself to abide the result of the Democratic primary and to sup port the nominees of the same. CHARLES STROM. /Notice to Stock Raisers. t?& My handsome saddle bred Stallion Dandy Denmark, will make, the spring season at my farm near Clark's Hill. Terms $15.00 to in sure living colt; will u*e all care with mares sent, but not responsi ble for accidents. J.H. GARRETT. Clark's Hill, S. C. TRADE MARKS DiBIGNS COPYRIGHTS ?c AB? one sending a sketch and description aa; anlakly ascertain our opinion free whether an Invention U probablr patentable. Communlca. i probably I lions umcuy confidential. HANDBOOK on Patenta tent free. Oldest agency for securing patent?. Patenta taken through Munn & Co. receive special notice, without charge, in the Scientific .American. A handsomely Illustrated weekly. J.nwrest cir culation of any selentlfio Journal. Terms. <3 a year : four months, IL Sold by all newsdealers. MUNN ?Co.?"""""'- Hew York Branch Office. (BS F BU Washington. D. C. The patronage of the people ol incentive to us, therefore we ha now have one of the. Most complete lines o! as can be found in any country c Your continue is solicited in heavy and fan< plantation supplies of all kinds, scowl hoes, Forks, shovels, ploi harrows, etc. We have a nice line of spring low cut shoes, spring and summe Imperial paints, varnish and ei Attractive articles are continus 10c counter. Assortment of books of standa The sales under the cash systei credit sales of the same period la The Red Hill Quarles and Laundry! Laundi Cold Spring, s ENAMEL (Neal's) .gives that smooth, beautiful,- genuine enamel surface ll ? so sanitary and so easy to keep bright and attractive.. Anyone can apply it by following the simple directions. If it's a surface to be painted, enameled, stained, varnished, or finished in any way there's an Acme Quality Kind to fit the purpose. W. W. Adams & Company Nights'of Unrest. No Sleep, No Rest, No Peace for the^Sufferer From Kidney Troubles. Ko peace for the kidney sufferer, j Pain and distress from niora to night. Get up with a lame back, Twinges of backache bother - you all day, Dull aching breaks your rest at night, Urinary disorders add "to your misery. Get at the cause-cure the kid neys. Doan's kidney pills work the cure. They're for the kidneys only Have made great cures in this locality. Mrs. B F Matthew, Barnes, St., Augusta, Ga., says: "I am very glad to say that I have used Doan's kid ney pills- with great benefit. I was a sufferer from backache and pains through my loins and kidneys and I could hardly get around for days. It was almost impossible for me to rest, I had but little strength or . energy and suffered from headaches. I spent a lot of money doctoring, but did not get satisfactoiy results until I heard about Doan's kidney pills and procured a box. Since using them my back does not pain me and my kidneys are normal. I now feel like a different woman and have told many of my friends about Doan's kidney pills." F the West-side has been an ve increased our stock C2t.il we ' general Merchandise >r small town. / d Patronage ?y groceries, dry goods and plow stocks, handle and vs, victor blades, Little Joe dry goods, ladies' and gent's ir hats and gent's clothing, namel. illy being added to the 5c and rd fiction by celebrated authors m have exceeded the cash and st year. Cash Store, Melliehamp ry!! Laundry!!! s. c All kinds always Vin stock We have a full stock of celebrated Keen Kut ter Lawn mowers with ball bearings, from $4.00 to $8.50. Nothing bet ter on the market. Iee Picks Iee Shaves 25e 40e Large shipment of "White Mountain" and "Arctic" Ice Cream freez ers on the road. Full line# of force pumps and pitcher pumps Pipings, fittings, hose, kitchen suits, etc. We carry a large stock of hardware of all kinds, but if we haven't what you want will order it for you. Stewart & Kernaghan Edgefield, S. Subscribe for The Advertiser