University of South Carolina Libraries
OLD TIMES AND NEW. Talk about the "old times!"-never times like Otis! Every sweethearts lean in' to a lover's ten der ki?s. Talk about the "old times!" nothln' like the new! Every blessed violet jest tend?a' with the dew. Talk about the "old times!"-sweet their songs an' words; Bat listen to thu slngin' ot the present m oe kl a' birds! Talk about the "old times"-they was sweet to see, Bot this new world an' these new times are good enough for mb ! 'ifL suppose I am eccentric," said Dick Clavering "at least they tell me BO;- at any rate there is a story anent . that, if you caro io hear." "Goon, go on," was thc unani mous rote. . Dick settled himself comfortably "" "that is to say, threw himself back in his chair, with one leg over the back of another. . . . "It waa a queer thing to do," he began. .'What was?" '"The will he made," said Dick; "but suppose he -was eccentric, too." "You forget that you haven't yet in Produced the gentleman," one of u? reminded. *. "Well, I can't say I know him my self," returned Dick, "though I was a distant relation; he had none but dis tant relations, in fact, of whom I was the most distant. It was for that reason, perhaps, or maybe because never having seen me he disliked me less bhan the others, that he left me all his wealth. '^The eut-off relations, yon may be sure," he continued, "looked upon my 'good fortune with anything but equan imity. They considered me a supplant er, a spoiler, a sort of testamentary usurper, in short, who had robbed them of their rights. The nearest of blood tried to upset the will. The testator, tV->y said, wasn't in his right mind when ho made it, and proofs were brought up of many queer things he had said and done. "But the jnry thought a man could V?> ksb<?neer without being crazy, and so found ? verdict establishing the dis puted document, jt'tr r.> "Of' conr8e, I was hated worse than 'ever by the disappointed claimants, but their, spite gave me small concern. With a light, heart and plenty of money a man is apt to be on good terms with himself, and not to mind much what other people think. "I went to spend a summer at an old-fashioned country farm, half hotel and half farmhouse, I found comfort able quarters and pleasant companions -among the later a couple of half fledged doctors, in whom the pranks and vagaries into which exuberance of spirits often led me, seemed to excite a lively interest. They were constant ly seeking to draw me out. They seemed to think me amusing, to find entertainment in their freaks, and to gratify them I was ever ready with some new extravagance. "One evening they invited me to take a rid? with them to visit a friend in the neighborhood, 'a brother chip,' they said with whom they assured me I would bo delighted "Jt was a long ride., but we chatted the time away, and at length, as the night begin to fall, drew" up before a large building. " This is Dr. Crotchett's,* said one of my companions. "As we alighted and ascended the steps the doctor ' came to the door. He received ns cordially and, the cere mony of~ Introduction over, led the wu y in. He was a tall, lank man, with .Awe of those perpetual smiles which it ~--would be a'relief to see broken now ...and then by a frown. ".'Show Mr. Clavering up, Leech,' V . skid he to one of his friends; 'you know the way, and I have a word or two to say to brother Pol!eti here.' "Leech took my arm and, at the end of a long corridor on the third ... vfloor,let me into a dimly-lighted room. - ! T thought it a strange place to conduct a guest to, but made no remark. "'Be seated,'said Leech; 'I shall return in a moment." "So sayiug he stepped out and closed the dcor. . jM. ?.?"Ihoogli is was summer the night ab was keen, and morning aud even - inp fires were customary. "Feeling a little chilly after our fy long ride I attempted to draw a chair /_ which stood near the wall towards a ^ flrepiat?e' at the end of the room. "Judge of my surprise to find the chair immovable. "My curiosity was excited-I took .*?survey of the apartment The lamp ?T'by w'tiich it was lighted hnug from the V , ceiling put of reach. The only articles of furniture were the stationary chair, a small iron bedstead and bedding, the former fastened to the wall and a washstand simi'arly secured. I ex amined the window; it waa. narrow and guarded by thick iron bars. "What could be the meaning of all this? I began to feel a tremor coming over me. Beads of perspiration stood on my forehead. I went to the door, essayed to open it, but found it locked from outside! I shook it violently, called loudly for Leech, and then made desperate efforts to kick down the door; but it was too strong and heavy and inspection revealed the fact that it was thickly plated with iron. "A vague feeling of horror had driven me almost frantic, when a slight grating noise attracted my atten tion. A portion of the door turned outward as if upon an hinge, disclos ing a small apperture, through which I discerned the face of Dr. Crotchett, with its rigid slekening smile. " 'What is the meaniug of this?' I demanded fiercely. " 'Come, come,. Mr. Clavering, be calm,' said the doctor, in his smooth, hypocritical tone; 'excitement will do you great harm, you see. We trust yon will soon be better.' * - ? " 'Better!' I exclaimed; 'why there's nothing, on earth the matter with me. " 'You are scarcely the best judge of that,' was the quiet response. > . f'.'Bnt I tell you I was never ill in my life,' I replied driven to frenzy by such insolent mockery. " "Not exactly ill.porhaps,'returned ^tb,? imperturbable dootor; 'but you l?. .have not been quite yourself lately, .' you see-not quite,' and ho tapped " his forehead significantly. "Then y?u take me to be crazy?' I said, bursting into a laugh at the ab surdity of the thing. " 'Well, well, if you only keep quiet and avoid excitement, we hope x to bring you round in a month or so.' "I strove to dash my fist in the fel low's, face, but the aperture closed /suddenly and I only skinned my knuckles. "Next morning breakfast was brought by a servant and passed through the opening. The man was coarse and biutal looking, apparently of the class not usually money-proof. There could be no harm in making the trial at any i ate. "I had a considerable 6um about me and bogan -with an offer sufficient, ns I thought, to tempt the mau's cupi dity. Ke rejected it, however, but in such a way as to render it evident he was only out for more. "I waB to impatient to haggle. " 'Only help me out of this, and I will give you all I have,' I said, nam ing the amount. " 'I'll put you in the way of work ing your own way out,' he replied, .that's the best I cnn do; but it must bo a cash-up job.' " 'Put the means of escapo in my hands,' I answered, 'and that moment the money goes into yours.' "With my next meal my new friend brought a small tile and a coil of rope. " 'All you have to do,' he said, 'is to raise the sash and hie a couple of the iron bars. Then wait till night and by means of this rope you may safely reach the ground. It's the longest I could get, but when you reach the end you'll only have to drop a few feet. Once you're safe off I'll come in aud remove the rope, ami twist up your sheet letting it haug out of your window, so tbat they may think you've doue all this without help.*. "With oue han/l I received my pur chase and paid the money with the other. "The little tool worked like magic In a couple of hours I had sawn nearly through two of the bars, leav ing barely enough to hold them in place till night set in. I could hardly wait for the darkness, but when it cam9 it took but a moment to com plete the work, remove the bars, ad just th? rope and begin my descent. "Soon my feet had passed the end. I was about to let go my hold, confid ing in the servant's word as to the dis tance remaining. But that mau may have played mo false,' something whispered; 'he may think my death the best security against the discovery of his bribery.' "I had been unable while a prisoner to look ont from my window upon the ground and now all beneath was dark ness. I had one way of determing the truth. I pushed my hat from my head and listened closely. Then came a souud as of some object far' below bounding from cliff to cliff. It was evident that I had hung suspended over a rocky precipice and if I re leased my grasp I should be dashed to pieces. "With what speed I could I clam bered back in my old quarters. Soon I heard a step outside. Doubtless it was the perfidious wretch coming to remove the rope aud arrange tho sheet. I crouched so"as to be hidden by the opening of the door. Soon it opened inwards. Springing from my concealment I seized the villain by-the throat. " 'Make the least noise and I'll strangle you,' I said through my clenched teeth. 'Now give me back my money.' " 'Do-don't choke me, and I will,' he gasped. "I relaxed my hold and the money was returned. " 'Now the key!' I demanded. "It was handed over. "Springing out of the door I closed and locked it on my late accomplice. I rushed down the stairs and along the passage to the front door. For tunately I was able to open it, and a few moments saw me free. " "But what was the motive of your imprisonment?" we asked. "Oh ! it was all a made up job b~ tween the doctors and the disinherited relations to enable the latter to get control of my estate. The certificate of two doctors, as the law then stood, was enough to get a man locked up as lunatic and my good friends Leech and Pellett had done me that service. But I made things disagreeable for the whole set by an action for false im prisonment afterwards." PEARLS OF THOUCHT. The direst poverty is poverty ol soul. Money develops all passions but love. The only way to have a friend is to be one. Manliness is the inability to take things hard. The eclipse of self is the measure of unselfish desire. Opportunity passes every door, bul finds the sluggard asleep. The swiftest colt is caught la3t success is at the eud of effort. Thiugs without remedy should be without regard. What's doue is done. Midway botwecn poverty and riches is a genial clime, named contentment with a little. Happy is he who can make of every obstacle in his path a stepping stone to tho ntttainmeut of blessing. The highest compliment a man can pay to the woman he loves is, "The thought of you is^home. " Personal beauty is like a letter of introduction. If it is not confirmed on acquaintance, it is worse than vain. The injunction "to earn a little aud spend less" emphasizes the law of self-support, and warn? us against tho dauger and possible degradation of debt. The absence of self-reliance is one of the chief defects of character iu young men, and largely the contribut ing cause of their failure in the busi ness world. Waiting will not take away the chronic ail, restore nerves and bones, aud remove pain, nor will it bring to the empty arms a:id the laceratod heart what they aro always crying for. Those who come back from their vacations should do so with a new ap preciation of humanity as compared with nature. Nature is restful and invigorating to men tired with the world. But it should produce a new unrest, which only the life of the world will satisfy. Whatever tends reciprocally to make life more beautiful to the individual or to permit him to mako it more joy ous to others, is well worth attain ment, and its results are not limited by the personal accomplishment of this end, but mould and form and even rectify the wrong bias of a nature in clined to be drawn hither and thither out of the safer paths. Oratory In the Commons. Eloquence, says Macaulay, nearly made a chancellor of the exchequer of Mr. Sheridan, , who could not work a sum in long division. Eloquence of a different kind did actually confer that post apon Mr. Disraeli, wh^se mathe matical accomplishm.euts were no greater than Sheridan's. A plainer stylo now suits the House better than rhetcic or epigram. But fluency is as much in vogue as ever. It has made Mr. Chamberlain secretary for the colonies and Mr. Chaplin presi- ' dent of the local government board.- j London Daily News, ? A PHILIPPINE GLOSSAEY BRAND NEW EXPRESSIONS BROUGHT HOME BY THE VOLUNTEERS. A Short Vocabulary for the Convenience and Edification of Teople Who Have Not Had tho Advantage of Itccent Philippine Travel. Now that the volunteers are re turning from the Philippines there is trouble ahead for tho dictionary makers. ]t is a peculiarity of Ameri can slang that it is at once so concise, picturesque and graphic that mose new words of this kind eventually force their way, despite dissent, into the lexicon. The volunteers will bring back -with them so many brand new expressions of this character that their vocabulary may prove all but in comprehensible. '.For the conveni ence of people who have not had the advantage of recent Philippine travel, aud also for the future reference of our lexicographers, a short glossary, with comments may be valuable. One of the words most commonly used in this dialect is "hike." Its derivation is doubtful, but its de scriptive power great and swift. "To hike" means to travel with amazing speed. It is generally used to give some idea of how fast tho Filipinos eau run when defeated iu battle. In cidentally, "kiking" is a term ap plied to the speed which American soldiers are obliged to develop when trying to catch the fleeing Filipino. So, iu a more general way, "Jiikiug" is applied to any swift and fatiguing travel, whi'e a "hiker" is obviously a man of hustling aud enduring powers. "Cold feet" is an expression often heard iu Manila. Its plain Anglo Saxon synonym is cowardice. Just how the two became identified may not at ouco bo apparent, but he who falters and fears in battle is apt to feel told chills chasing down his spine. It is the most natural anatomical result for these cold chills to Fettle in the feet. Hence the term. "Woolen socks," or, more brierly, "socks," meaus anything that will enre or overcome "cold feet." "Coffee coolers" aro those who man age to get detached from their regi ments in tho field and assigned to mora or less easy aud eminently safe berths in Manila. A "coffee cooler" is supposed tobe unable to swallow his boiling hot coffee on the morning* of battle. Obviously, if he wants to drink his coffee, ho must remain be hind aud cool it while his regiment is moving out to the fray. Needless to say, "corlee coolers" are not esteemed by their comrades. A "googoo" is a Filipino who fol lows the cause of tho revolution. While tho derivation of this term is rather obscure, it is hinted that it must be sought iu the anuals of Am erican political history. An "ami go," by contradiction, is a Filipino who protests his loyalty to the United States aud bis disiucliuation to fight According to tbe soldiers, the only didereuce between a "googoo" and an "amigo" is that the former -"-cars the blue and white uniform of the in surrecto, while the latter wears the white cotton garments of peace. Each is equally at heart a rebel against Uncle ifam. Hence, in the American soldier's vocabulary, "amigo" has come to signify a false friend. "Bain-maker" is not a term of Philippine birth, but it is heretthatit has gained its vogue, and.so is worthy of a place in this description. When the Third infantry went on its .Leech Lake Indian campaign, inst previous to embarking for these islands, there were several dootors along- with the regiment. While the pow-wows with the Indians were going on the redskins manifested some interest in onr army surgeons. The red healer could prepare "medicine" which was warranted to bring about a copious rainfall in time of drouth. Could our medicine men do as much? Of course it would never do to confess our doc tors to be inferior io the untutored savage, aud so tbe Third's officers un hesitatingly asserted that our sur geons, too, could make rain. That fastened tho name of "rain-maker" to our army surgeon, and the term has gained great favor on Luzon is laud. "Bom-bom" is a noun of strictly nativo inventiou. The more accurate term would perhaps be native imita tion. A cannon on being discharged gives forth au angry roar of "bom!" In a second or two the shell explodes with a fainter "bom!" Coupling cause and effect gave us "bom-bom." If a native desires to explain that a big fight is on, he plaintively says, "mucho bom-bom." This pheuonie nou of artillory fire is a good deal of a tragical puzzle to tho little browny. I remember seeing a couple iu Melo ban, man and wife, who found an un exploded navy shell in their backyard. Full of desire to penetrate the mys tery of the bom-bom, they placed the shell in a mortar used for grinding corn, aud treated it roughly with the pestle. The doctor who was called recovered all the fragments of tho shell from their bodies, but, in spite of his tenderly humane care, both unfortunates soon jDenetrated the greatest mystery conned by man. "Aqui" is not really slang. It is a Spanish word for "here," and is also used in the senso of "como here," but it has gainoil so firm a place in the soldiers' vocabulary that it must not be forgotten. "Prouto," moan ing "quick," and "para," for "stop" or "halt," are other words of Spanish extraction. "Mex" is now typical Philippine slaug. It refers to tho Mexican dol lar, the former standard of money in those islands. As a Mexican dollar is accepted in trade as worth just half of au Americau dollar, so "Mex" has como to mean "half." When a sol dier declares that he has paid a cer tain price for au article, an incredul ous comrade sarcastically inquires : "Money or Mex?" Wheu Fuuston was crossing on his famous raft at the Rio Grand de la Pampanga, a Ne braska volunteer on his way to the front from tho hospital wearily ap proached a cautcen at Mololos aud in quired how much further it was out to the firiug line. "Eight miles," was tho reply. "American or Mex?" he eagerly in quired. "Chow-chow" is a word which the Chinaman took to the Philippines with his pigeon English. It means "to eat," "eating" or "food." The soldier has emphatically adopted the word, though he has shortened it to a single "chow." "Rough house" signifies "trouble" or "fight." To say of one that he is making or having, or has made or bad "a rough house" means that he got angry, with the general smashing of everything ascessible. There is a J lt tie story which illus trates tho meaning of ono phrase that is considerably in vogue. A soldier was pacing his beat in fr?nt of the en trance to the pa!ave one day, when he espied a general in the act of alight ing from his carriage. The regula tions proscribe that under such inter esting circumstances tlie sentry shall call out to the corporal of the guard :. "Turn out the guard! General officer!" But the sentry, in his excitement, forgot the conventional language, and the approaching general was amazed to hear the young soldier blurt : "Turn ont de whole push! De main guy's come!" So it has come to pass that "turn ing out the push" refers to prepara tions for receiving a distinguished or very welcome guest. With these laboriously compiled ex planations, I trust that you will be able to couverse with, and understand, your returned volunteer friend from the Philippines.-H. Irving Hancock, in tho Criterion. BLINDNESS IS A BLESSING. So Says tho Famous Hymn-Writer,Fanny Crosby. "Did you think you would find me grieving because 1 am blind?" Mrs. Fanny Crosby, tho sightless hymn writer, asked when I expressed sur prise at finding her so different from any picture my imagination had painted. "Ah, my dear, loss of sight is one of my greatest blessings. But for my blindness I should never have realized so perfectly God's mercies; I should not have received so good an education, nor should I have cultivated my memory to such an extent. " "I write my hymns, as a rule, six or seven at a sitting. I mean by that I compose and hold them in my mind until I have six or seven. "My memory ia the storehouse* of all my knowledge; as you who retain your sight go to the library and read a book or consult a dictionary to as certain facts, I turn a leaf in my me mory, and if ever it has been placed there I find it. Before I was nine years old I had committed to memory the first four gospels, as well as tho first four books of the Old Testament. It was my habit in- my childhood and early youth to memorize five chapters a week, so now, you see, I sit here with my hands folded and turn the pages of my memory bible as I com pose my hymns. "Hymn writing in my opinion, re quires au other talent besides that of poesy, for all great poets are not great hymn-writers, and of course the re verse is also true. My hymns are written oftener from inner sugges tions than they are inspired by actual incidents. Though some, and mauy of them the public consider my best, have been inspired directly by strik ing incidents. Now, you may remem ber having heard 'Rescue th9 Perish iug. ' Well, tho words came to me Jiko a flash. You know I teach in a Methodist mission in Water street, and one night at a meeting, while I was leading, a poor boy under 17 years of age came forward and asked our pray ers. He had come from the country to New York in search for work and had been led astray. As I listeued to his story tho words of that hymn came to me almost if not exactly as they stand today. "Then again I had been very much in need of money, and quite unex pectedly received just tho sum I wished. At once there welled up in my mind, or my heart, I cannot say which, the words, of 'All tho Way My Savior Leads Me.' Again 'Safein the Arms of Jesus' was inspired by an incident which touched very nearly my heart, but about which I should prefer not to apeak just now. Another timo I will tell yon, but not now. "Oftenest, perhaps, my hymns have been written to order, Don't b* sur prised; hymn-writing comes as na turally to me as prose writing does to yon. " 'The Prodigal's Return' wa3 writ ten in just that manner. Mr. Brad bury came to me one day, saying, 'Faunie, can't you write mo a hymn for this tune?' and he hummed the tune-'JoyI joy! joy! there is joy in heaven with the angels; joy! joy! joy! for the prodigal's return,' sprang to my lips as he finished, and in a few minutes he had the hymn aa it stands today. "Now, besides hymn writing my work consists in going down several times each week to the business place of the large firm who publishes all my hymns these days and criticising the work of other hymn writers. We have many in this country who have done, and are still doing, fine work. The manuscripts as they come in are read to me and I criticise and often suggest alterations for those which my pub lishers purchase. "There is needed something moro thau a mere jingle of words iu order to give n hymn au abiding life. There must be something which appeals directly to the Christian conscious ness aud coming forth from the ex perience of the writer. So few per sons, even though they have a talent for poetry, can be successful hymu writors, I think chiefly because they have never learned to feel. That is ono of the blessings produced by my loss of sight. I feel. Rhyming comes as natural to mc as breathing-indeed, it is often an effort to prevent myself from speaking in rhymes. Bnt I can not write prose; every one laughs at it. It resembles, more than anything else to me, a man wearing tight shoes. J ucver write a line of it when it cnn be avoided. "-Lafayotto McLaws, in Chicago Record. In Heroic Attitude. When Sir John Steell, the noted English sculptor, had tho Duke of Wellington sitting for a statue he wanted to get him to look warlike. All his e (Torts were in vain, however, for Wellington seemed, judging by his face, never to have heard of Waterloo or Talavera. At last Sir John lost patience somewhat, and this sceuo followed: "As I nm going to make this statue of your grace, can you not tell me what you vere doing before, say, the battle of Salamanca? Were you not galloping about the fields, cheering on your nieu to deeds of valor by word and action?" "Bah!" said tho duke in evident scorn, "ii you really want to model mo as I was on the morning of Sala mauchn, then do me crawling along a ditch on my stomach, with a telescope in my ham!. This Duck Eats Mice. Henry Vandiveer of Macsville, Ky, owns a pet duck which kills and eats mice. Heury has a barn, built upon foundation posts which leave the floor of the structure about two feet above ground. Beneath this crib tho corn falls through the cracks in the floor, and it is a favorite loafing place for the barnyard fowls. One day Mr. Vaudi veer was iu the yard watching some mice at play. Presently a mouse fell through to the ground. No sooner had it done so than the pet duck pounced upon the little fellow and swallowed ir down, having first stunned it by a blow on the head. Since that time the duck has acquired a keen taste for mouse aud now goes about the barn in a methodical way in rearch of mice. "You Can't Catch the . Wind in a Net." Neither can you cure catarrh hy local applications. It is a constitutional disease, and is cured by Hood's Sarsaparilla be cause it is a constitutional remedy. It expels from the blood the impurity <o)hich causes the disease, and rebuilds and repairs Hie inflamed membranes. E of Spavin, Curb, Splint, Capped Hock, Sore Tendons, Cuts, Kicks, Bruises, etc., by using Also an invaluable remedy for man. When taken internally it cures Cramps and Colic. It is the best antiseptic kttotvn. Every bottle is warranted. SoliI by dealers and druggists generally. Family ?lac, 25c. Hone aize, 50c. and $i.oo. Preparad by EARL S. SLOAN, Boston, Matt. The Wheat of tho World. Broomhall's estimate of the world's wheat crop is 2,496,000,000 bnsh?ls, a decline of 390,000,000 bushels as com pared with the yield of last year. Other European experts made the de crease as against last year's cron from 281,000,000 bushels to 377,000,000. It may be token for granted that the yield this year will be below two and A half billions of bushels, or, say, 350, 000,000 below 1898 and 225,000,000 bushels below 1897. Tho falling off iq the Americas is about 170,000,000 bushels as compared with 1808, and tho crop this vear is about equivalent to that of 189*7. PCTSAM .FAJJEUISS DYK produces tho tatest and brightest colora of any known dys btu (T. Sold by all druggists. A groot politician can persuade the peoplo that what bo wants ls what they want. . K-iward Coko, tho English jurist, wm o: opinion that "A man's house is his castle." Wanted. Two travolln?r salesmen In each Southern state. 5*0.CO and expenses. Pormnnent position. Experience not absolutely noco.sfary. Artdroas Peerless Tobacco Worts Co., Bedford City, Ya. When some people feel rnn down they ac quire the bicycle habit and run others down. Con't Tcbacco Spit and Smoke Your Lite Away. To quit tobacco easily nnd forever, bo mag netic, full of life, nerve and vigor, take No-To Bac, the wondor-worlter. tbat makes weak mon strong. All druggists, Wc or 91. Cure guaran teed. Booklet aud sample freo. Address ?Sterling Remedy Co., Chicago or Now York. Some women marry just to soo what kind of fool husoands men will mako. Words of Famous Mission Worker. Mr. John F. Barclay, a well known Atlanta man, nuflerod from dyspepsia. Ile says : "Atlanta. Ga., January 23.-Dr. thoo. 0. Tyner: Having used Tyner's Dyspepsia Rom cdy for years in my family I gladly add to what has already boon said in its pralso. Without exception lt la tho finest remedy on tho market, . and nothing would induce mo to be without lt. J .NO. F. BARCLAY ." 50o a bottle, at all druggists, or sont for prie e, express paid, by Tynor Dya pepsi?RomedyCo.,? Mitchell St., Atlanta. Qa. Sena Five Cents tn stamps/or Sample, FREE. RIVER PADS, Marlow P. O., Ala-, Joly Sith, 1809. DB. EARL S. SLOAX. Boston, Mass.: Dear Sir-I nave UBed your Nervo and Bone Liniment for tho last yoar, and have uevor before found its equal for man or beast. It is good especially for sprains and bruises on Horses, and I am never without it. I havo re commended it to several and it has nevor failed to elvo satisfaction. Do not be afraid to advertise lt too highly, tor it will euro where all other remedies fall. Respectfully yours, (Signed) EDWARD MORRISON. NOTE.-To any ono wiio will send their name and address to Dr. Sloan, ho will send them His book, 'Treatise on the Horas," froe. Wo are'indubted to Colloy Clbber, not to Shakespeare, for "Riobard ls himself again." To Cure Constipation Forever. Toke Cascarete Candy Cathartic. 10c or Bc. Jl C. C. C. fall to cure, drnggistsrefnndmoney. An acrobat mar he unable to appreolate a joke, yet he is qulok to tumble. ACTS GENTLY ON THE ?Mir w OVERCOMES^ Wb PERMANENTLY Guy THC GENUINE - MAN'F'O By ii?PNiA fir. Cvpypio Vo MY. ? 4* CAL. >-C0 Mfc f?.Y. **C roa ?Ait EY an MweoiS& pe'? sot KR Kmc, 0IA CAD 9 i Fortnnea In stocka; lnvrat $5 to $ I? run O I SIPO and pet 8100? fer ?loo sure; ?foan a bank. Heed k Co.. 123 S. 6th St., Pbllo., Pa. Sparrow Carriers. A man in Georgia some time ago caught some sparrows and trained them so that he can open their cage and they will fly hack apnln without any other inducement than the love of their home. This trainer watched the birds carefully and made up his mind that sparrows could be trained to do the work of carrie: pigeons, and that, ns they were smaller, they could be more valuable In case of war. He gave one of his sparrows to a friend who was going a distance of one hun dred and fll'ty miles, and told him to free the bird when ho had reached the end of his journey, and at the same time to telegraph him when he did so. The bird reached home and went di rect to its cago, raakiug the journey in a little over an hour and a half. To cure, oi A Royal Present It ls the custom of Eastern poten tates to gire to their visitors all that tl'2y may praise or seem to like. Slr Reginald Pounceby-Pounceby call ee1 on the Sultan of Muzzemore when ht was shooting in the district, and stopped to admire the heavy gate. "Beautiful!" he said. Han. an hour afterward he found two great natives struggling to get into his portmanteau. An elephant passing attracted his at tention It was mad with rage and was tramping a way through the mar ket place. "Fine elephant," said the sultan. "Splendid beast." said Sir Reginald. "It is yours," said the sultan, sim ply. Sir Reginald gasped, but thanked Royalty, for it means war to refuse a gift. "My chief wife," said the sultan, as a heap of flesh waddled Into the cham ber. It is etiquette to praise all things belonging to the sultan, so Slr Reginald was in a fix. If he did not praise her he knew that assassination would fol low, and if he did she would he his. "You no like her?" said the sultan, suspiciously. "Blamed fine woman," said Slr Regl nald, in desperation. "She is yours," said the sultan, push ing ber across. She waddled over and sat on Slr Reginald's knee, seventeen stone of plumpness, rising sixty. "Thanks," gn6pod Sir Reginald, and presently he made his adieu, leaving a fine double-barrelled gun and a few knick-knacks behind. A Prominent Physician. Dr. C. I. S. Cawthon, of Andalussia, Ala., writes: "I find Tetterine tobe superior to any remedy known to m. for the care of Eczema and other stub born forms of skin diseases." If there were only many others as honest as Dr. C. how much mankind would be b...?sed by this iruly wonderful anti dote for all itching eruptions. 50c. a box -at druggists or by mail from J. T. Shuptrine, Savannah, Ga. THE SALE OF HORSE-MEAT. Agricultural Department Experiments to De* tect it in Food Products. The chemistry division of the depart ment of agriculture has undertaken an Inve tigatlon of horse meat, to ascer tain whether there ls any way to dis tinguish between that article and beef when they are In the form of sau sages or canned goods. There have been numerous reports that horse meat was regularly sold In this coun try as beef. Inquiry developed thc fact that several firms slaughter and dress horses, two or three now being under federal inspection. Most of them are situated In the far Western states, though there are one or two in Chicago, which are not under inspec- j tion. All the concerns assert that they sell their entire product abroad. "When canned or made Into sausage, it is very difficult to tell horse meat from beef," said Dr. H. W. Wiley. "It ls the purpose of the present experi ments to decide whether there is any microscopic or other test which will detect horse meat in those forms. When freshly killed it is not hard to distinguish. We will make sausages of horse meat, and of beef mixed with horse meat We will also can it just as beef is canned; then the cans will be opened, and all manner of tests ap plied to see whether any chemical changes have been produced by the canning operations. If lt is found- to be possible to detect horse meat -when mixed with other meats, lt will be a simple matter to compel the deniers to label tho product in whatever market it is sold, should such action be deemed desirable and the necessary legislation forthcoming. Good horse meat ls not a bad or unsavory dish. Vast quanti ties are eaten in France, generally un der some other name. I have no doubt I have eaten it myself in some of the cheaper cafes in Paris. "Most of the horses slaughtered in this country have come from Califor nia and Washington. At least, thc slaughtering establishments are there, and the horses are drawn from' the country around. During the last year or so the industry has fallen off con siderably, on account of the increased value of horses caused by the war. When I was in California four years ago I saw a herd of about 1,500 horses sold at 35 a head. They were all good horses, three-year-olds, sound, and well bred. They came from big ranches, and had been raised for domestic use, but there was no demand for them. The coming of electricity as a motive power on street railroads destroyed one of the principal markets.' But the price ls now getting above, the killing mark, except for inferior stock." Naming fhe Baby In Persia. The naming of the child in Persia is. made an event of great rejoicing, and a time for the gathering of the relatives. When the guests are as sembled sweetmeats are eaten, and then the infant, in its swaddllug clothes ls brought tn and laid on the carpet -In the centre of the room by one of the priests. Five names are written on as many slips of paper and placed between the leaves of the Ko ran; a chapter is read from this book and then one of the slips is drawn at random. The name on the slip ls the one tho child has to bear through life, and the priest takes up the slip, pronounces the name in the child's ear and places the piece of paper in its clothes. Gifts and con gratulations follow. The custom in Japan is for the par ents on the thirteenth day after its birth to take the child to the temple they attend, and the father gives three names to the priest, who writes each on a piece of paper. These are then shuffled about with certain in cantations and thrown up in the air. The first that falls is the one chosen. This is ihn written by the priest on a consecrated piece of paper and is given to the child's parents to pre serve. The child then receives cer tain gifts, two of which are important. If a boy, two fans are presented; and if a girl, a pot of pomade, and in each case a packet of flax thread is added, which signifies good wishes and a long life. How Are TOOP Kidneys t .o^V.^^K^R"8 ?,1118 onn M kidney ills. Som. plo free. Add. Sterling Remedy Cc, Cnlcaco or N. Y. There ls poetry in flowers, but the verse makers Ufr" t shy of thu chrysanthemum. nts permanently cured, No nts or nervous PPM.-ifter lli-sr. day's uso of Dr. Kline's Groat Nerve Restorer. SS trial bottlenndtreatlaetree. I'lt. li. ll. KI.I.NK. Ltd.. 931 Aren St.. 1'hlla., Pa. When ono woman praises another the praise Is usually tinged with sarcasm. money refunded by your 11 Up-to-Date Tommy Atkins. Tommy Atkins is still regarded in the Boer homestead as the poor man in a red coat and a white helmet who stands up to be shot at; whereas if the Boer were to see tho Natal garrison in the field he would be thunderstruck to find that there ls not a red coat or a white helmet among them; that Tom my ls almost as clever as the Boer himself in taking cover; and that his uniform is such that he can scarcely be distinguished from the dry grass through which he ls wriggling his way. -Transvaal Critic._ A Curious Discovery. At a depth of twenty-seven feet a curious discovery wo s made recently, a Berlin paper says, on the island of Gothland-the skeletons of several knights in full armor scated on their horses. Archaeologists think they date back to the ninth century. Tile No* Explosive. Thorite, rho new explosivo ha* been distil . cuishlng itself by passing th.-ougk o 4fa Inch Ha:veyizod steel plate. If its success contin ues,- lt Trill make as groat r. record for itself 1 s tho military world ns Hostetter'B Stomach Bitters bas in the mrdtccl -world. So for nothing has appcnroU -which can equal this wonderful modlulno in its speedy sud perma nont ma?teiy of all diseases of the stomach, liver or kidneys. It's a good remedy to try when OYO ry thing elso has failed. Too many men are satisfied with their aim in life if th?y hit a smali target. Beauty Is Blood. Deep. Clem blood means a clean skin. No beauty without lt. Cascareis, Candy Cathar tic clean your blood and keep it clean, by stirring up the lazy liver and driving all im uritles from the bodv. Begin to-day to anish pimples, boils, blotches, blackheads, and that sickly bilious complexion by taking Cascareti.-beauty for ten cents. Ali drug gists, satisfaction guaranteed, 10c, 25o, 50c. The most worthless man cAn always find some woman willing to marry him. 8100 Reward. 8100. Tho roaders of this paper will bo plea?o3 to learn that there is at least ono dreaded dis ease that 5r-ioncc lina been able to cure in all itsst'iices. and that is Catarrh. Hall's Catarrh Cure is the only positiv?- cure known to the medical fraternity. CatArrh bel fica constitu tional disease, requires a constitutional treat ment. Hall's Catarrh Cure i? taken intoro*lly, acting directly on the hlood and mucous sur faces of the 6yKtero? thereby destroying the foundation ot the disease, and giving the pa tient strength hy buildinguptbeconstitutlon ?nd asslatlng nature in doing its work. Tho proprietors have so much faith in its curative powers that rhey offer One Hnudred Dollar for any caso that lt fails tooure. Send for list of te^imonials. Address F. .1. CHKNEY & Co., Toledo, 0. Sold by Druggists, 75c. Hall's Family Pills are tho best. QUALITY_AND_NEWS, Famo and Excellence Aro Determining Factors in Successful Development, ONE OFjTHE IMPORTANT FUNCTIONS OF HIGH-CLASS NEWSPAPERS. In presenting interesting phases of selon tiflc nnd economic- problems, high-class newspapers frequently give Information of as groat value lu their advertising columns as in those devoted to the publication of the principal events of the day, and when the fr.rao of a product ls extended beyond its natura: limits into foreign lands, and a largo demand oreated throughout Great Britain and her Colonies and the principal sea-por is and oftios of Europe, Asia and Afrloa, lt becomes a pleasant duty to note tho fact and to tull nf tho points of excel lence on willoh so groat a sncoess is based. Wo refor to the now world-famed laxativo remedy, Syrup of Flea, the product of tho California Fig Syrup Company. The merits of thlf well-known excellent laxative were first aiado known to tho world through tho modlcal journals nnd newspapers of the United States; and ls ono of the distinct achievements of the press. It is now w-dl known that Syrup of Figs is nu ethical proprietary remedy, approved by tho most eminent physician* everywhere, because lt is simple and effective, yet pleasant to the taste and acceptable to tb? system, and not only prompt in its beneficial effects, bat also wholly free from nay unpleasant after-effeot8. It is frequently referred to os the remedy of the .healthy, beoause it is used by people who enjoy good health and who live well and feel well and aro well informed on all sabjeats generally, includ ing laxatives. ' In order to get Its beneficial effacts, it is necessary to get the genuine Syrup of Figs, which ls manufactured by tne California Fig Syrup Co.-only. , i cannot speak too highly of Pl*o's Cure for Consumption.-Mrs. FRANK MOBBS,215 W.2Sd St., New York, Oct. 20,1891. A man is in his cups when the contents of tho cups are in him. Educate Your Bowel* With Cascurets. Candy Cathartic, cure constipation forever, 3Cc. rsc. if C. C. C. fall, drugclstsrefund money. Some people would have lots of leisure if they saved all the time lo<t by hurrying. oes your heed ache? Pain back of your eyes? Bad taste in your mouth? It's your liver I Ayers Pills are liver pills. They cure constipation, headache, dyspepsia,? and all liver complaints. 25c. All druggists. f: ft'ant your moustache or board a beauUful " ro-wn or rich black? Then uso ?ers BUCKINGHAM'S D?E ? Ll? rr?, or PjBjSJgl. Og a. ?. Hm. A Cc. NMMU., N. for our new lineof CHRIST MAS BOOKS; all bc-nnd In cloth : no "trash." Exclu sivo rljrht of territory ; OUTFIT FREE. E. NICHOLS & CO., Atlanta, Ga. Used by millions, sura proof of its quality. Cautious. "Don't let Henrietta hear you allude to her as my bettor half," said Mr. Meekton behind his hand to the friend who had come to dinner. "I understand. The expression is a trifle commonplace, not to say ple bian." "It isn't that. But I wish you'd choose another fraction. It would an noy Henrietta vastly to have you think she was less th four-fifths, at the lowest calculation." Hair Makes a Strong Rope. It has been stated that If the hairs on the head of a fair-haired person could be plaited together they would make a rope strong enough to support a weight of something like eighty tons, or of 500 people. This sounds rather a big statement, but the strength even of a single hair is quite surprising when its fineness is considered, as any one can test for herself hy seeing the force that must be expended in breaking it. ff Bi Cures ail "Hiroct and Lung Affections. COUGH SYRUR ^ G-?tthes?uuiac. Refuse substitutes. Ja Vis suREjf Dr. Bults Pills cure Dyspepsia. Trial, so for $c MENTION THIS PAPERSS^?SS zn How Mrs. Piddsam HELPED MRS. GOODEN. [lirrza TO aria. riHxnxu wo. r?,7J33 "I am rsry grateful to you for yi kindness and the interest yon hara J taken in me, and truly believe your medicines and advice are worth, mor?, to a woman than all the doctors in the. world. For years I had female troubles and did nothing for them. Of coarse I became no better and finally brok? down entirely. My troubles began with inflammation and hemorrhages from the kidneys, then inflammation, congestion and falling of thc womb and inflammation of ovaries. " I underwent local treatment every7 day for some time then after nearly two months the doctor gave me permis- > sion to go back to work. I went back, but in less than a week was com pelled to give up and go to bed. On breaking down the second time, I de cided to let dootors and their medicine alone and try your remedies. Before the first bottle tras gone I felt the of ieots, of it. Three bottles of Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound and a package of her Sanative Wash' did me more good than all the doctors' treat ments and medicine. "The first remark that greets rr?> now is 'How muon better you look!' and you may be sure I never hesitate to tell the cause of my health."-Uss. E. J. . GOODEN, ACKLET. Li. Why take Nauseous Medicines? Are you suffering with IHBTGESTIOH? Are yon suffering with m NEV or BLADDER TROUBLE? Are you ?abject to COLIC, FLATT J.KN CY or, PAINS in tho BOWELS f De yarn enfler frort RETENTiON* or SUP. PRESSION of URINE ? Do yan feel LANGUOR, ?Rd DEBILITA TED ia tho jawn\na< CURES THEM ALL ! ! Pleasant te tata, Stimulating, Diuretic, Stomachic, fifcsolBtely Pura. THE BEST a I DH EY and LIVES HEDICIHE IN THE WORLD Ul I For Salo by all GKOC2KS and DRCOCISTS. _ BEWARE OF SUBSTITUTES. AlILL?, , . Evaporators, KETTLES, ENGINES, BOILERS AND SAW MILLS, AND BEPAIRS FOR8AME. Bristle Twine, Babbit, Saw Teeth nn<3 Filen, Shafting, Pnlleyn, Bolting, Injectors, Pipe. Va Ivo? and Fittings. LOMBARD IRON IRKS & SUPPLY CO, AUGUSTA. G Av ; ' 3.50 SHOES Worth $4 to $6 compared .with other makes. Indorsed by over 1,000,000 wearers. TJut genuine have W..L-, DoujtiV name and nricej ?umped on bottom.- Take< no substitute claimed to. br fi* ?oed. . Your dealer ^ Jehould- keep them- i/^ Snot, we will lend a pair on receipt of prie*? Stats Wind o ? cather, ?it?, and width, plata or cap toe. "Cauloju?. Circe. * ff. L. DOUGLAS SHOE CO., Brockton, Mass. SK YOUR DEALER FOR .a. BIG.r TOBACCO. No Gifts or Premiums, but YOU GET THE VALUE IN THE GOODS. The Best Chew on the market to-day. TO S8H?0U HssMfi' Tuition low. All Kooka KRBE. -olTUftTIOXS GUARANTEED? iver d? HsiKiacwn und dbi I ch Premier typ* wrltera. KU ?tutenta laut rear from 7 staten. 8th roar. Send far ca.'al^oe. Addreee. Dop'tK. STRAYER'S BUSINESS CQl'CE, BaUltnore.Md. ' CEED WHEAT MMLL W We again offer tho cleanest seed .wheat on tho market, and from probably the largest crop yield In the State, If not tho United States. 'We had 355 acres in wheat ibis year, and the crop averaged 29 bushels cor acre. Where we bad a good stand, not winter kil lfd, we bad over 40 bushels per acre. Ona hundred buehels of our wheat will contain lew cockle teed than one bushel of ordinary deed wheat. Price ?1.15 por bushel on care at Charlotte. Jiags hold two bushels and are new-no charge for bags. Terras: Cash with order. CHARLOTTE OIL & FERTILIZER CO. Per FBKI) Ol.I V KT.. Prea'i. CBABLOTrE..N. C. "CASCA?ET3 do all claimed for tbeia and are a truly wonderful medicine. I have often wished for a medicino pleasant to take and at ?.tat bavo found lt in Cascarei6. Since takln? Ibens, my blood has beso nnrl?Kv? and my ccaiplcxlun DIS Im proved wondorrully amt 1 reel much better ID 6very way.'" MRS. SALUE ?BLLAUS. Luttrell.Tenn. Pleasant, Palatabie. Potent. Tasto Good. Do Good, Sever Sicken. Weaken, or Grrpo.10c.2Sc.S0o. ... CURE CONSTIPATION. ... Sterling Rta??7 Coitsuy. Chingo. PfontrMl. E?w Tar?. SH Un Y fl QfilP Sold and iniaranteed by all drag* HU- I ?f'?A? sists to CURE Tobacco Habit. NEW DISCOVERY;jrlTet f.?) I owek p?*M?f and enrea wtTrt ores- BOUK "f testimonial*and lOdirvg' treatment Fr?:e. Dr. H. H. GREEK'S 80W.\ It? B. Atlast?. O a, SALESMEN W?WTE9 ! V Dercrr* Wood Tobacco Co .Gr?ro*boro.iV.C. If afflicted wita ) ?cr* ayes, ua? { Thompson's Eye Wator HWIi1 Ji lill 11 WI ll MIP? v UUKt? mat AU tLSt rAH.5. " I Bert Cough Syrup, Tastea Good. Uso j tn tUac. S.ila by drugftst?.