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Kissing Mother. A father talking to his careless daughter said: "I want to speak to you of your mother. It may be that you noticed a care-worn look upon her face. Of course it has not been brought there by any aot of yours, still it is your duty to chase it away. I want you to get up tomorrow morn ing and get breakfast. When your mother comes and begins to express her surprise, go right up to hex and kiss her on tho mouth. You can't im agine how it will brighten her dear face. "Besides, you owe her a kiss or two. Away back, when you were a little girl, she kissod you when no ono else was tempted by your fever tainted breath and swollen face. You were not as at tractive then ns you are now. Through years of childish sunshine and shadows sho was always ready to onre, by the magio of a mother's kiss, the little, dirty, chubby hadds whenovor they were injured in those first skirmishes with the rough old world." A Revised Version. Doctor-I would advise you, doar madam, to take frequent baths, plenty of fresh air and dress in cool gowns. Husband (an hour hter)-What did the doctor say? Wife-He said I ought to go to a watering place, and afterwards to the mountains, and to get some new light gowns at once.-Fliegende Blatter. Ten Thousand Ti?cs or Thirty, It matters not which, may subject you to sea Bicknets on tho "briny deep." Whether you are a yachtsman, an ocean traveler, out for a day or two's ll.-hing on tlie salt water, or even un inland tourist In feeble health, yon ought to be provided with Hostetter's Stomach Bitters, a valuable remedy for nausea, colic, biliou-ncss, acidity of the i-tomnch, malaria, rheumatism, nervousness and sick headache. Lay In an adequate supply. A grateful mind is both a great and a happy mind. _ Dr.K?mer's SWAMP-ROOT cures ali Kidney and Bladder troubles. Pamphlet and Consultation free. Laboratory Binghamton, X. Y. He enjoys much who is thankful for lit tle. _ ltira. P. C. Adam*. Thousands of women, especially In the spring of tho year, aro nervous, tired, have headache, sick stomach, fainting Bpells, diz ziness scanty or profuse mense*. weak back, constipation; their sides, shoulders and limbs ache constantly-in fact, they suffer from general debility of the whole system. The su perior tonic qualities of McElree's Wine of Cardui make it the leading remedy for this class of troubles. Mrs. P. C. Adams, Chattoogaville, Ga., writes: "Two years ago I was taken sick with indigestion, fainting spells, constipation, fail ing of tho womb, and various other symptoms, and kept getting worse and wor.se. After taking four bottles of McElree's Wine of Car dui in connection with Thedford's Biack Draught tea I am able to do any kind of work that a woman can do." D. L. Coker, Calvin*. Fla., says: "McElree's Wine of Cardui hos brought rosy cheeks bac k to ono of my cousins after she was given up to die by two of the best physicians. Alway? Carra Indigestion, Dyspepsia, Bad Breath, Debility, Sour Stomach, Want of Apputtte. Distress After Eating, and all evils arising from a weak or disordered stomach. It builds up from the flrt-t dose, and a bottle or two will cure the worst cases, and Insure a good appe tite, excellent digestion and result in vigor ous health and buoyancy of spirits. There la no better way to insure good health and a long life than to keep the stomach ruht. Ty ncr's Dyspepsia Remedy is guaranteed to do this. Tho Tranquilizing Atter-Dinner Drink. For salo by Druggists. Manufactured by C. 0. Tyner, Atlanta. _ Tho Trust After >'o-To-Bac. Chicago Special.-Reported hero to-day that a large sum of money had been offered for the famous tobacco habit cure called No To-Bae, by a syndicate who want to tako it off tho market. Inquiry at tho general offices revealed thc fact that No-To-Bac was not for sale to the trust at any price. No To-Bac's success is marvelous. Almost every Druggist in America sells No-To-Bac under gunranteo to euro tobacco habit or refund money. And Ulrike .Honey At Ir. If j-nit only knew it, the trouble is with your digestion. If that was goon you would sleep bftter. wake better, work better, and mnko more money at it. How can one "cet on" when th?- whole system is sluggish? But peo ple don't realize what is the trouble. A box of Ripans Tabules makes life worth living. At druggists. It is So EOHT to Remove Corns With Il indercorns.we wonder so many endure them. Get It and see how mcely it takes them off. Conductor E. D. Loomis, Detroit, Mich., s.-ns: "The effect of Hall's Catarrh Cure is wonderful." Write him about it. Sold by Druggists, 75c. Mrs. Winslow's Soothing Syrup forchildren teething, softens thc gums, reduces Inflamma tion, allays pain, cures wind colic. 25c. a bottle Piso's Cure cured me of a Throat mid Lung trouble of three years' standing.-E. CADY, Huntington, Ind., Nov. 12. ISM._ ls Your Blood Pure If not, It ts important that you make it pure at once with the great blood purifier, Hood's Sarsaparilla Because with impure blood you are in con stant dnnger of serious lUness. Usx<\H>c> Dills curt> babltunl constipa ?rlOQU S r ll IS Hon. Price 23c. per box. * H?GI?E^^~?WA^RD* W.ORLD'S FAIR. ?! ? THE BEST ? PREPARED SOLD EVERYWHERE. * JOHN CARLE & SONS, New York, * THE OGLETHORPE Brunswick, Ca. This is the finest Hotel in its appointments south of Ballimore. The table is supplied with all tho delicacies ?he market can alford. The Cuisine is excellent, and service prompt and attentive. Open ?ll the vear. Rates rea sonable. J. H. STILWELL, Manager. GOOD POSITIONS SECURED BY STUDENTS Business Firms Supplied wi Help Richmond's Commercial College, Established ISSI. Send for Catalogue. SAVANNAH. GA, n TO AVOID THIS "CT ?3 33 U0M TETTERINE Slf ? Th? oNi.Y painless and harmless p CUSI for the wont tyne of Kciema, j I Totw, Kaworra, ugly roa sh patch ell 1 es on the face, c rust eal scalp, ll I | Ground itch, chafes, chaps, pita #|| pies. Poison from Wy or poison oak. IA In short ALL ITCHES. Send 60c. in |.|| stamps or cash to J. T. Shnptrine, M Sarannab. Ga., for on? box, lt jour 1 ' drug gist don't keep it. HuT?L CUMBERLAND Cumberland Island, ca. Finest sea boich in tho S mth. KiMnng unexcelled on the continent. Stree? carn free to the hench. Nopbtua heinch ?nd fleet of row boats. Splendid Jiviry appointments. Ample accommodations fer SO guests. Orand orchestra! Musks morning and ?ten ?an, Popular rate*. LEE T. ?SHACKELFOKD, Proprietor ,M WHERE AU ELSE i AILS. Cough Syrup. Tastos Good. OB? In thoa Sold by drn?glet.v eON SUMPTION UNDER THE THORN. Under tho thorn in the field of clover Two hearts mel In tho Summer morn, Met by chance with tho blue skies over, Under the thorn. Love, the live blossom of lit*, reborn, Burst into bloom in tho heart of each lover lu full frulton, that feared hot scorn; Sweet aro tho songs ol tho birds above her. While love, no more with its heart forlorn, . Discovers the lipr it would fain discover, Under the thora. Under tho thorn whon tho blossoms wither, Shall Lovo lie languid or droop foiloru; When its joys had gone and you wonder whither, Under tho thorn. Still in thc springtimes yet unborn, Like a cloud or blossoift or bird-wing's feather, riucked from its flying pinions toro, Shall love forever in Its own weather Come through tho air In life's azuro morn, When two hearts phall meet, thus por chance, together Under the thorn. -Bennet Bellman, in Philadelphia Times. BOHEMIA. AX SEVENTEEN. HERE are high hills on every side save one - the south approach leads up from a valley a mile away. The house faces tho iucline, and back of it, !ap and up, the grade rises until less than a mile away the tops of the green pines toss their brushes against the sky. Right and left close hills hedge in the house, and on oach side is a touch of the primeval forest. Back of the house on the inclino is a flower garden, a kitchen garden, a straw berry bed, a ?trip of green corn and a field of yellow grain. In a corner of the gardcD, beyond the beds of vegetables and rows of thyme, rosemary and sweet marjoram, grape trellis and clump of currant bnshes, where ripo fruit hangs like bunches of coral, there is a chestnut tree, and under its shade is Janet Town send's favorito retreat. Janet is seventeen. Her black hair is braided to her waist, and beyond that falls ia a silken bush that touches the grass as she sits with her hands clasped around her knees, her body leaning forward. Her eyes aro dark, and have in them that wistful, inquir ing look you sometimes see' in the eyes of the young. Janet is dreaming of the future, waiting for the kingdom to come to her, and it is so much nearer than she dreams. Overhead a songbird rustles among the leaves and flits upward from limb to limb until the topmost bough is reached. He pipes two or three short, inquiring notes, turns his head this way and that to see if ho is to bo undis turbed, and then ho balances forward, while tho rich round notes of his wild song seem to fairly tumble from his throat. "Janet! Janet!" a voice is calling, "Janet, your father wants yon." The girl's hands unclasp ; she throws out her arms, numbed by the tension of the olasp about her knees, and then she lightly runs down the path to tho house. "Eather wants you, Janet," one of the children repeats, as she bounds up the steps of the back porch ; "he is out on the front stoop." "What is it, daddy?" "Were you busy, Janet?" "I'm never busy, dad." The man looks at the girl half re gretfully. "I am afraid you don't like work, Janet. Work is a good thing." "Yes, I know work is a good thing -tho right kind of work." There was silence for a few miuutes and then ahe said, reaching out for the paper he held in his hand : "Do you want me to read the rest of that con tinued story?" They had just reached the trial in the last chapter. "Nb, not just now. Mother and I have been sort of talking things over and we have decided that wo will use thc honey money each yeur for the children's education. Now, you are the oldest, Janet, and mother thinks you ought to have a chane? because you havo alwayB had to take care of the younger ones. I saw Zekial Hale in town to-day, and he tells me Eliza beth is going to a business college in the city. Mother and I concluded we'd have you go with her. Elizabeth's a good girl." "What would I do with a business education, dad?" "Oh, lots of girls aro learning to be bookkeepers and stenographers and so on. Do you. want to go?" "Not to be a bookkeeper, dad." "Why?" "I have got book learning enough but if you will let me study drawing' -the girl goes behind her father and puts her arras dose around his neck. "I can draw well now; Mr. Muncie 3ays I can learn no more from him. I want to be an artist." The man's face is thoughtful. "I don't know about that, Janet. I'm afraid mother won't agree, but Til ask her. Children npwadays do learn dif ferent things from what they used to." "Dear old dad!"-and the arms hug closer. "And I will live in Bo hemia !" He didn't say anything more. He is very proud of this bright, dark girl ; he has an innate feeling that she really would not make a bookkeeper or an office girl ; she is so different from the other children. The matter is finally settled, and she is going away. Away from the cottage, all woodbiuo covered ; the sweet, damp wood6, the birds that Bing in the treetops. Away from the deep, clear watered creek aud tho favorite spot where the eddy is formed by a jutting bank and tho speckled trout skims tho water and leaps at tho wide winged fly that hovers over. No feather fly and spoon hook have ever swept that water. It was all about her, but the girl did not know it-Bohemia, land of childhood and innocence, of all good things in life. AT TWENTT-TWO. The curtain has gone down on the last stage picture, the immense audience has turned its back upon the orchestra, which is pouring out in stentorian tones the stirring strains of "The Star Spangled Banner." Fashion and beauty have been present to bear a star of unusual magnitude read one of Shakespeare s wonderful character in the process of a play, and they are going out more than ever impressed with the great bard's wonderful knowledge of tho natures and man ners and genius of men. In o right hand box some ladies have been sitting during the perform ance, deeply interested until the next to the final act, when the principal character leaves the stage. He bas been the guest of the elderly worm at dinner, for he is one of society favorites wherever he goes. Wi the box party there is a dark girl red oloak, rich velvet ruffles clo about her throat, a red flower in h jetty hair ano! a few moro are in h band. This is Janet Townsend twenty-two, the clever artist who work depiots many scenes in books the day, whose pen and ink sketch are sought by publishers everywher The ladies are waiting for the croM to pas3 out, so they may go comfor ably to their carriage, then the staj door swings and the star is standii with them-a man of some thirt seven, straight and firm, ey es dark ar teuder as a woman's, and hair that touched with a tint of sunshine. ? is a conspicuous figure in the world i men, yet thero is not a singlo trick i manner or a distinguished feature < whim to attract. Brilliant, straigh forward, honest and sincere, a poet : nature, he sees tho beautiful of li and recognizes it everywhere. The ladies shake hands with hie with words and praise of thanks for delightful evening. Janet is the lai to oiler her baud, and the others ai passing out toward the lobby as el does so. They walk slowly up the short lligl of steps, he still holding her fingers i if in assistance. "There is something very peoulic about this," ho is saying. "I lnw never met you until to-day, and yet : seems as if I had known you all m life." The full glare of the electri light is falling upon her uplifted face A flush creeps up to her cheeks, mak ing them ahnest the tint of the ruffle about her throat. She smiles brightly "Perhaps we met in some othe world," she says. "I am sure we have not; Ishouh have remembered. Mrs. Allyn tell rae you have made some charade: sketches from ono of my plays." "I made them from your photo graphs? Would you like to sei them?" "May I?" "If you care to come to-morrow af ternoon I shall be pleased to shov them yon." Ho puts her iato the carriage witl her friends, and then stands for a mo ment looking after the brougham roll ing down the whito asphalted street. nWhat a glorious woman I" Janet Townsend's studio is a simph place where artists may always be sure of finding kindred souls on Friday af ternoon, whero newspaper men anc publishers drop in and get ideas foi this or that. Pictures, draperies, pot tod plants, portfolios, and hundred) of sketches in black and whito are all about. Janet is talking to a well-known publisher about a cover design when the star enters. She drops the piece of card and goes forward to greet him. "I am so glad you have come.' The welcome is simple, but tho flush on her face speaks moro than words. Sho shows him the sketches, exquis ite work from photographs in charac ter, and ono by one, as tho day ia drawing to a close, tho visitors drift out, and they are left alone. A sort of embarrassment creeps over both. "You have had a successful season I" "Very." "And yon will come this way again?" "I hope so." He looks np quickly. She raises her eyes. He reaches oat his bauds and Aakes one of hers. "Shall I see ; JU. when I come again? May I hope that you will look for?" Bis voice has grown very tender and lie is speaking hastily. Into her dark syos steals the old sweet wistfulness they used to wear aud her lips are trembling. .He notes all this, and the tight clasp oa her hand lightens. His voice is changed when he speaks again. "I am glad I mot you, Miss Town send. I shall always remember you." l?o drops her haad. "Adieu!" She is not looking at him now. He raises her chin with the tops of his fingers. "God bless your bonnie brown eyes Janet." He speaks her name so softly that die scarcely hears it, the curtains part ind fall between them, and she is standing alone. If she sinks in to a chair and throws :ier arms over tho portfolio on the table containing his pictures, there is 30 oae thero to see. Bohemia, world of heartaches and partings, of dead 6ea fruit, so beauti ful, so bitter, yet so sweet. AT TWENTY-SEVEN. There is a cottage ia the heart of a Sew Eugland City, built long ago cvheu laud was plenty, aad no oae has ?ver beea able to encroach upon or narrow down a single inch of the gen erous stretch of lawn and garden. It ia a lonpf way from the street gate to the wide veranda. A graveled walk leads up between the wide stretches af rich, green grass. The front of tho house is covered with amp?lopsis, that rugged vine which beautifies so many Eastern homes. At tho right of the house there are pear trees loaded now with white blossoms, tossiag out aa the wiad their rich peculiar per fume. The mcon, so sadly neglected by the people of cities, is sailing over head and making the pear trees look like great icebergs. The perfume of the blossoms has been iatensified by the dew. From one window there ?lcams a little light; iaside a sweet, blue-eyed child is sleeping., while through tho gate a maa aad woman slowly stroll aad como up the graveled walk together. "That play always impresses mo leeply. What iufinite understanding that man puts into his part!" The aerious faco of tho broad shouldered man shows that ho has indeed been deeply impressed by the evening's performance. "He has lost none of his old art. I saw him in that same character ton years ago and he has aot chaagod oao iota. I mado some sketches of bim thea, which afterward appeared ia Walter Bridgman's splendid work on Shakespeare." They have reached the veranda. "Let us sit out hore for a while; it is so cool and lovely." The man draws forward two deep chairs and tho woman removes her hat. Her dress of creamy whito stuff, with rich lace about her throat, setc off the brilliant beauty of face and the per fect form. The hair is parted and drawn plainly back in the latest mode, and this is Janet at twenty-?even, the wife of a man who has numberless pictures in tho academy, whose nama is known in this and nearly every other country, but a man as modest and unassuming as mau could be. They havo seen that samo old play to-night ; tho star who had almost asked /anet to wait for his return, and w?o probably had not thought of her twice in all ?hesa years, had played that same old splendid character and Janet has sat and listened to him with tho keenest enjoyment. She is not thinking of him -ow, however, "I had a letter from home to-day," she says. "Dad writes that mother is not very well and wants mo to come down and bring Kachel. Doi/t you want to go, too, Robert?" He thinks of the picture that ia to be finished to hang on the line. "You mustn't tempt me, Janet, but you go and take little Eay. It will do you both good. I will take you down and bring you back." "And you don't mind if I am not here to meet the people from abroad, and will you cancel our engagement with the Murrays at the shore?" "Certainly. Don't we owe every thing to dad-mustn't we establish a precedent for Rachel?" "Robert, do you know I told dad ten years ago that I wanted to live in Bohemia, and he said in his Jetter to day : 'You will find the same old seat under the chestnut. Maybe it isn't like Bohemia, but it's mighty pleas ant. "And you found Bohemia, Janet? Don't you know tbat Bohemia is every where? lt was under the chestnut when you were a girl ; it was in your studio when you were sketching; it is here under the pear tar?es now. When you bound Bohemia, sweetheart, you do not say it is bounded on the north by this country or that, and on the south by something else ; you say it is bounded above by the blue sky of heaven and on every side by God's free air and sunshine." "Why, you are a poet, Robert." "No, dear, only a Bohemian." And with her arm through his she crosses the veranda and together they go in to little Rachel.-Chicago News. 1 Burglar's Dual Lile. The arrest of "Joe" Killoran, alias Howard, in New York, together with several notorious characters, on the oharge of being a postofnce robber, has revealed to many New Haven resi dents one of the most interesting characters that ever entered the City of Elms. Killoran lived in New Ha ven several years ago in one of the most respectable portions of the town and became acquainted with many so ciety leaders, who would hardly care to claim his acquaintance to-day. He came as mysterously as he left. He brought with him an attractive woman, whom he claimed was his wife, but who was in reality Fanny Wright. The pair wero charming and interest ing to meet, and soon made the ac quaintance of a number of members of the best families. The Killorans took a house at 86 Wall street, and it was there that many well known persons came to know them and frequently dined with them. About ten years ago Killoran was first arrested, and lt was then that his acquaintance with prominent per sons stood him in good stead. A gen tleman who knew Killoran told the following story about him : "Killoran," this gentleman Baid, "was a charmer among men and women. He hud a wonderful person ality tbat attracted almost every one that ever knew him, and he knew many of the most prominent and influential persons in New York. His friendship with these persons undoubtedly kept him out of prison a good mar y years. When he was arrested ten years ago there were eight penitentiaries wait ing to receive him. When Killoran lived in New Haven he knew many of the best citizens, and yet his house was visited again and again by the most notorious bank burglars this country has ever produced. They came to consult with him whenever they had a big job on. He was what is called a 'spider' in that business, and if ho told all he could make a book of the most startling order, 'Joe How ard' and 'Joe Lawler' are two of Kill orari's aliases. ' In a Desert Sand Storm. Mr. and Mrs. Whitelaw Reid, who have been visiting Egypt and the Ho.'y Land for the last seven months have return ad to New York City. While iii tho Egyptian desert they were obliged to lie flat on the ground with their heads covered for several hours in order to avoid being suffocated. Tho storm began first in the middle of the night. The first gusts swept the tent from its fastcuiugs and spread the suffocating canvas over the sleep ers. Then it was swept away into the night, leaving them all at the mercy of the blinding, choking clouds of sand. Tho minute particles cut into their flesh, got into t'aeir eyes and mouths and buried them in its drifts. It flowed down their backs, filled their shoes and every fold in their clothes. The force of tho blasts blew particles even through the chinks in their trunks, and when the bags and boxes were opened afterward they were found to be full of sand. Almost impercep tible particles were driven between the leaves of booka in these bags end boxes. The storm lasted Bevon hours. At its outbreak the oamel drivers, who had seen such things before, piled the camels' saddles about Mr. and Mrs. Reid and covered their heads with blankets. Then they built up a bul wark of trunks and lay prostrate wh le the suffocating blasts continued. The seven hours of the storm were hours of agony. Every ono in the party was almost suffocated by the sand, a^d when it was over they arose as if from the dead. The faces of all were cut and sore from the flying sand and their eyes were red and aching. The traces of this experience remained with them for many days. -San Fran cisco Chronicle. homo Great Readers. One of the best educated men in this country, say?, regretfully, that he never had a day's schooling in his life. Ho taught himself to read, a friend introduced him to the famous works of modern authors and he has eagerly devoured books, newspaper and magazino articles until ho is an authority on literature. Yet ho has found time to make a modest fortune, not by speculation, but close attention to business ; is devoted to his family and belongs to several clubs, so that he cannot be called a book worm. George Peabody used to tell how hiB unole thrashed him for "wasting his timo over books," but the tasto for reading was never whipped out of him. John Wanamaker says: "3ince I was a boy 1 have read everything that came into my hands, and I have been surprised how useful odd scraps of in formation have proved. When I seo a young fellow spending his spare cash on magazines and papers I know he is furnishing his brains for suc cess." Gladstono is an omnivorous reader and one of tho best customers London booksellers have. Cecil Rbodes, thu richest and most influential mun in South Africa, one whom English politicians watch with suspicion, was described by a native chief aB "A man who eats a whole oountry for his breakfast and sit* amidst clouds of paper.,; BUDGET OF FUN. HUMOROUS SKETCHES FRU31 VARIOUS SOURCES. The Halcyon Days-Hardly-A Chari table View-Off and On-An Accommodating Judge His Choice, Etc. In years agone when he had not Tho five-and-twenty cents. He watohed tho dally ball game through A knothole in the fence. Ho sits in the grandstand now And man-els much to know Why he SRO? not half of what ho saw Through the knothole long a?o. -Cincinnati Tribune. A CHARITABLE VIEW. She-"Poor Jennie Lewis can't see a joke to save her life. " He-"Perhaps she is mentally near sighted. "-Truth. A BABE TBEAT. Tagleigh (rapturously)-"Did you ever see Brainwaves, the poet, in ono of his rare moments?" Wagleigh-"I guess BO. I met him afc dinner. "-Life. OFF AND ON. "What you need is horseback exer cise." "I've tried that, doctor." "Didn't it do you any good?" "It did whilo I was on the horse. " -Life. NOT THE KIND SHE WANTED. Teacher- -"Children, you should al ways respect your teacher. Now, Willy Green, tell me why you should respect me." Willy-"On account of your age." -Puck. HARDLY. Friend-"And do you belong to thc Realistic School of Writers?" Author (despondently)-"I guess not. I have never been able to real ize on any of tho stuff I've written." -Puck. ms CHOICE. "Which would you rather be Wil lie, a monkey or a giraffe?" "Giraffe every time. It would bo bully in tho summer time looking over the baseball ground fence."-Texas Siftings. AN ACCOMMODATING JODRE. Mulcahey-"Sure, Oi'm innocent, yer honor, and Oi'll prove it if vez will give me toime." His Honor-"All right. I'll give you thirty days on tho Island. How will that suit you?"-Truth. THE HAPP? FUTURE. Cora-"So you think it will be a good thing for the men whoa women aro emancipated?" Merritt-"I uhould say so. A fel low will thon have a chonco to marry a girl with a good political job." Judge. ire WAS BIGHT. Pedagogno (severely)-"Now, sir, for the lust time, what's the square of thc hypothenus of a right-angled tri angle equivalent to?" Boy (desperately)-"It's equivalent to a a lickin' fer me, sir. Go ahead. " -Judge. A PBESSING CBEDITOB. Official Receiver (at a meeting of creditors)-"What have you come hero for?" Professional Boggar-"To put in my claim. Herr Meyentcin used to give me twopence every week."-Eu lenspiegel. PLEASUBE AND PAIN. De Peyster-"Cupon'a cook costs him $20,000 a year." Miss Iverson-"I thought it wa9 only 810,000. Where does the other ten go?" De Peyster-"To Coupon's dyspep sia specialist."-Truth. WHAT DOES HE MEAN ? Miss Oldgirl-"You must promise not to kiss me while I am uncon scious." Dentist-"I shall do nothing of the kind." Miss Oldgirl (with a happy sigh) - "Turn on the gas."-Puck. A GENIAL TEMPERAMENT. "They's nothink like takin' things good-naturedly," said Mennderiug Mike. "Yes.*" said Ploddin'Pete. "Thet's my way o' doiu'. Whenever I takes things I allua lets the folks as owns 'em do the gittin mad."-Washington Star. JOST TO START A BBEEZE. Jane-"Henry, what would you do if you should go to the postoffice, buy a stamp, ask the man to stick it on for you and he refused?" Henry (who is very serious)--"What would I do? Stiok it on myself." Jane-"I should stick it on the lot ter."-Tit-Bits. THE CCBBICULUM NOW. Tom-"Why didn't you go back to college ?" Dick-"Deficient in mathematics." Tom-"How did that happen?" Dick-"I calculated that I could kick the ball clean over the goal and I didn't roach it by twenty feet." Now York Herald. AGREED WITH HIM. "Wat I like about your boes," re marked the caller who was waiting to see the head of the firm, "is that you always know where to find him. And he calls a dpade a spade." "Yes, and he calls us paid when we ain't half" paid, too," grumbled the office boy. -Hartford Courant. SOMETHING FOR NOTHING. Uncle Hays-"Wal, I kuewit would come ! Hetty Smith made a splendid clerk fer Si White's store ; but I know he'd git tired payin' he? wages." Aunt Martha-"Law mo ! He hain't gone and discharged her, has ho?" Unelo Hays-"No, maw; but he married her yesterday."-Puck. STILL WOBSE. She-"I should like to draw your attention to something but you are so jealous." He-"Say on ; what is it?" She-"A gentleman has been dog ging us for a considerable time." He-"Unfortunately I have no ground for jealousy on this ocoasion. The gentleman is-n Sheriff's officer !" -Wiener Luft. < OMR A OKS. "Something ought to be doue to prevent those two lunatics from going out rowing together," exclaimed the nervous womau. "Don't mind 'em, madam," replied [the bystander. "Each is in good company. Ono of 'em is the man who rocks the boat and the other is the man who wants to see how far from shore ho can swim."-Washington Star. INCONSISTENT NEWSPAPERMEN. Miss X.--"I'm going to send this item about our 5 o'clook tea to tho 'Weekly Gossiper. ' " Miss Y.-"They won't take it. You've written on both sides of the paper." Miss X. -"Dear me, I don't eee why they need to be so stiff about it. They print on both 8ide3 of their own paper, don't they?"-Roxbury Ga zette. A FESTIVE OCCASION. "Grabbles doesa't seem to get any amusement at all ont of life." "Ol?, I cruess he has his fun in his own way." "But bo never indulges in any di version ; and be never exerts himself in the way of hospitality." "Not in the ordinary sense. But you ought to seo how happy ho is when he is entertaining a business proposition. "-Washington Star. WORDS OF WISDOM. A crank-The fellow who is swim ming up the stream. He who can not govern himself can not govern his horse. Conscience warns U3 as a friend be fore it punishes as a judge. He that will not supply new reme dies must expect new evils. A thoroughbred is a man who for gets that he has new clothes. Every man's namo looks pretty to him when it appears in print. A girl visitor never has better clothes at home than she has with her. Courage is, on all hands, considered as an essential of high character. It is no sign that a man is a fool, be cause he differs from us in opinion. A man who has no poor kin thinks it would bo a pleasure to help them. It is nature for a woman to think that sorao ugly man is good looking. A deaf man nearly always hoar3 everything you don't want him to hoar. Every man occasionally wishes that he could attract as much attention us a fire. Unless a man is first rich on tho in side no amount of money can give him wealth. The man who is living only for him self couldu't be engaged in any smaller business. No matter how bright tho pleasures of sin may be, they are only pleasures for a season. If you Jct thc sun go down upou your wrath it may stay there until tho judgment day. German Army Marriage. No German officer can marry with out the consent of his Colonel (accord ing to Poultney Bigelow in tho Bor derland of Czar and Kaiser), and this consent can bo obtained only after careful inquiry into all the circum stances surrounding the proposed al liance. First, is the young lady suit able for association with the wives of the other officers? Second, will the bridegroom be able to live respecta bly and bring up his family? Third, are his means, or those of his wife, invested in proper securities, so that he ?8not likely to be expelled by rea son of bankruptcy? Tho extraordi nary social advantages enjoyed by the German officer, and the pecuniary re sponsibilities growing naturally from such advantage, make his small pay, which amounts only to about a dollar a day in case of a First Lieutenant, appear even smaller than it is. An American lady, who has beea spending a winter in Dresden, told Mr. Bigelow that all tho bachelors of the garrison were furnished with a list of marriageable women,each name ornamented with the property she might be expected to inherit. This, no doubt, was a mistake on her part, but it is a very common one. German officers stationed in desirable towns are very apt to to get into debt, and have to choose between leaving tho army in disgrace or marrying a rich girl. Mr. Bigelow adds : "From my own experience in Germany the officers would appear to have married for love and tobo happy in consequence," and yet, "the number of those who get into debt and fail to secure a rich wife is considerable, although it makes no particular ripple on the surface ; such men simply disappear and turn up sooner or later in America, where they take employment as coachmen, waiters, teachers or instructors in riding schools. The change of life is very violent, and is adopted only as preferable to suicide."-Philadalphia Press. -II JW - Scaring Unwelcome Visitors. During the Franco-German War a couple of hundred Uhlans arrived in a Norman village. One of the peasants hurried to a neighboring hamlet to warn a well-to-do farmer that ho might expect a visit from unwelcome raiders. The farmer was equal to the emerg ency. Calling his wife and daughters, all went to work with a will. Torn quilts, tattered petticoats, dilapidated gowns, were thrown over the backs of the cattle, enveloping them up to their horns, while their feet and their heads wero bound with straw. Then the sheep and goats wore treated in the same fashion ; bottlos of medicine were scattered about ; a large trough was filled with water, and in its midst was placed a great syringe. Up carno the Uhlans, but at sight of the strangely attired animals and the squirt they hesitated. At la?t ono of the troopers inquired what was tho matter. "The rinder pest," said the farmer. He had to answer no more questions. His visi tors turned their horses' heads and galloped off at thoir best speed to mako requisition elsewhere. - -Pearson's Weekly._ How a Rat Emptied a Restaurant. A Larkiu street restaurant was nearly wrecked yesterday by a most peculiar incident. As it was the noon time, the business was lost for at least one day. The proprietor, who had been out on the street somewhere, went to a closet, douned his black alpaca coat and started to wait on a couple of la dies. He drew a napkin from the coat pocket to brush a crumb from the table cloth, when out jumped a rat nearly as big as a groundhog. The women were on the table in a second. Men upset chairs and tables trying to stamp on the animal, but it escaped all the blows aimed at it and chased around and arouud the place looking for some avenue of escape for fully five minutes. By the time tho restau rant cat woke up and caught the rat tho place waa a sorry wreck and half the patrons had disappeared.-San Francisco Post, Intoxication From Tea. Although Cowper spoaka of "tho cups that cheer, but not inebriate," there is evidence of the intoxicating power of tea. In China tea is rarely used till it is a year old because of tho peculiar intoxicating property which new tea posses. Three or four grains of theine aro contained in loss than half an ounce of good tea and may be taken in a day by most full grown persons without unpleasant effects, but if twice this quantity, or eight grains, a day bo taken the pulse be comes more frequent, the heart beats moro strongly and trembling comes on. At thc same time tho agitation is excited, and aftcr awhilo the thoughts wander, visions begin to be seen, and a peculiar state of intoxication comes on. All these symptoms are followed by and pass off in a deep sleep. Whether the tannin in tea contrib utes in any degree to its exhilarating or narcotic action is not known. That it docs aid in the exhilarating effect which tea produces is rendered very probable by the fact that a species of tannin ?B the principle ingredient in tho Indian betel nut, which is so much prized in tho east and which is said to produce a mild and agreeable intoxi cation. Mate or Paraguay tea, pre pared from tho leaves of the Brazilian holly in tho stato in which it ?B com monly, used for a stimulating beverage, also intoxicates.-Baltimore Amcri Klectric Camera Annihilates Space. A Ridgewood, III., man hos perfect ed and invented an electric camera which can be attached to any electric circuit-such as telegraph or tele phone-and reproduce images of the persons speaking or communicating with each other ; thus cnnbliug parents to see their children, friends see friends, even though a continent in tervenes. So perfect is the action of this electric camera that every move ment and even change in facial ex pression are faithfully shown. There IM ('leisure rind Profit and satisfaction in abating troublesome and painful ills by ming Pa> ker's Ginger Toole. ON^ ENJOYS Both the method and results when Syrup of Figs is taken; it is pleasant and refreshing to the tapte, and acts ?ently yet promptly on the Kidneys, <iver and Bowels, cleanses tho sys tem effectually, dispels colds, head aches and fevers and cures habitual constipation. Syrup of Figs is the only remedy of its kind ever pro dueet?, pleasiug to the taste and ac ceptable to the stomach, prompt in its action and truly beneficial in its effects, prepared only from the most healthy and agreeable substances, its many excellent qualities commend it to all and have made it the most popular remedy known. Syrup of Figs is for sale in 50 cent bottles by all leading drug gists. Any reliable druggist who may not have it on hand will pro cure it promptly for any one who wishes to try it. I)o not accept any substitute. CALIFORNIA FIG SYRUP CO. SAN FRANCISCO, CAL, LOUISVILLE, KY. NEYS YORK. NV. Ci with Pearli isn't necess; thing of a soap good to go with better than soa] before the soap j You're simply clear waste of sc something, thc ing and cleaning, fry!*? ?y v T^r^? wv SELL ON Lovell Diam HIGH GRADE IN EVERY P. LATEST IMPROVEME HAVE ?O?R MECHANICAL FRIE! to show tho work nnd material to men wi Wo etako our business reputation of wheel made in the world than tho Lovell Warranted in every rospect. AU prie Catalogue free. 4?-lf there is no agent ii Manufacturers ARHS, BICYCLES AN! JOHN P. LOVI 147 Washington St., ) 131 Broad St. 1 Fertilizers fo should contain a high pe insure the largest yield anc of the soil. Write for our "Farmers' Guide, is brim full of useful information for will make and save you money. A( GERMAN 1 Baking isownv? PURE Hints for Young Housewives. Shirts should be turned inside ont to dry, so that no dust or specks may drift against them and stick while the starch is wet. Flannel must be washed in tepid suds-merely squeezed through the hand, never rubbed on a board-and then -rinsed in clear, warm water, whipped ont and left to dry. The art of making clothes look clear and transparent is to rinse all the soap out of them. One way to keep them from looking streaky with bine is to whip them out smartly before pinning on the lino. Stockings should never soak, but be washed out at once. Colored muslins and ginghams are best washed without soap in warm water, to which has been added two quarts of wheat bran previously boiled half an hour in six quarts of water. You can carry the little vial of Doctor Pierce's Pleasant Pel lets right in the vest pocket of your dress suit, and it will not make even a little lump. The "Pellets" are so small that 42 to 44 of them go in a vial scarcely more than an inch long, and as big round as a lead pencil. They cure constipa tion. One "Pellet" is a laxative ; two a mild cathartic. One taken after dinner will stim ulate digestive action and palliate thc effects of over-eating. They act with gentle effi ciency on stomach, liver and bowels. They don't do the work themselves. They simply stimulate the natural action of the organs them? selves. MEDICAL DEPARTMENT. Tulane University of Louisiana. Its advantngos for practical instruction, both ia ?mp!? laboratorio* and aban lani hospital material? uro nni-qitaled. Frun access is giren to tba great Charity Hospital with Tun Linds and Si, nt) patients an nual:)'. Special instruction is given (lai r ATTHEBF.D. BIDS OK TUR BICE. Tbi next passion begins October ITth. 189?. For cataloga i .ind Information address Prof. S. E. CH AILLE, SI. D., Dean. ZSTV. 0. Drawer 2C1. NEW ORLEANS, LA. HOTEL TYBIE TYBBB ISLAND, GA. Tili? lintel ii noted Tor its excellent service and splendid cu ?inc, iii-: tabin being supp iod with ill toa .iolicicivs tho m.trkot afford <. An abundant suppl/ of :i-!i, cr ib', *hr mp, etc Loon's ?ne orchestra en raged for season. Specially low rates this season. Write for terms. Special inducoments to partis? ot ton or moro. HO HAN ds COWAN. Treated fret.' 7o.IUr.ljr CCIIXD ?Ith TcfHaMe BtmKlUs. Hara cared maur thoo, sand cases pro nounced hopeless. Fremont dote jrmptonn rapidly disappear, and in ten day? it least fro-thirrli of alltyiaptomsaigremorea. BOOK of testimonials of miraculous cures sent FREE, OSBORNE'S yoe ? School of Sb.ortb.and AUGUSTA, ?A. , . . No text bonlm nsid. Actual bunness from day ot ent?rine. Bti-in'its pspor?. college corr-nor and good, u ed. Send for aaadMsMly illustrated catv loguo. Coard cheap. R. H. faro pa d to Angnst*. GREAT OPPORTUNITIES ATC not nil gone. To see tho wonderful Atlanta.Ex po- iti'-n this fall ?son? nf titi great tlvngsofa life time. The civiiiiMd world will b* there- Wo hire arranged to lake luOo* our Georgia aalesm-n there, at our own ex pense, dnrine the month?-f Saptxmb r, October and Novemb-r. 0 ir book. . TRUMPET BLA81S," Istha grijntH?.t ne'.liTund moot attractivu book on the market E. B- Smith, Jr., .lawer Ci-, Ga-, reports42order?in roT'Midsy?. F. J. F wW, PIICOCJ., liv, 'ei'?''"S??" durs in MI <iavi. Send for iu 1 inurruiation. SOLTll WKwTKKN rUBI.IMIllKM "OUSE. No. '209 North Celles? Kt? Nashville. Tenn. gPEHUZflX Short ha^T^pewr?, PBACnCAL rcnniaSSp'. TeY.T PARKER'S HAIR BALSAM Cleamcs and beautifits the halt. Promotes n lniuriant growth. Nerer Falla to Bestore Gray Hair to ito Youthful Color. Cures ncalp ili.eai.es k hair tailing. Wc. and <1.UP at Druggists A. N. U.Twenty-nine, '95. ne. 'Twould be absurd. It ary. Pearline contains every y nature that's needed or that's it. And Pearline is so much p that it lias the work all done begins to take any part, throwing away money. It's a ?ap-and soap may be good for nigh it isn't much use .in wash when Pearline's around, wi SIGHT! tond Cycles. 4RTICXTLAE! NTS, H?HTEST WEIGHTS ! ?D examine these machines, es we desire io know -what good work is. over ii ft v years that there ls no better Diamond. es, sizes and weights. Call and see them, n your pince write us. ?nd Jobber? in D SPORTING GOODS. !LL ARMS CO., - BOSTON, Mass. r Fall Crops * ?rcentage of Potash to I a permanent enrichment " a 142-page illustrated book. It farmers. It will be sent free, and idress, CALI WORKS, cs NMHU Street, Nt* York.