The Abbeville press and banner. (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, September 21, 1887, Image 7
- .
" BUDGET OF FUN.''
HUMOROUS SKETCHES FROM
VAltlOUS SOURCES.
A Truly Wonderful Man?A Barber's
Frightful Evaniple?Determining
to Sell?Wanted Insurance?Too
Old. Etc., Etc.
Featherly?4,I don't think much of
r_: 5 Tinml,, ')
JTUUl lllCUU JLWUIII^I/U, i/uuiiM.
Dumley?"What's th? Matter with
him?"'
Fcatherley?"I read him an original
poem last night of twenty-four verses,
and he walked off without saying a
word."
Dumley?"lie is certainly a wonderful
man."
Fcatherley?"How wonderful?"
Dumley?"In being able to walk off.
If he were not a wonderful man he would
have been carried off."?Harper's Bazar.
A Barber's Frightful Example.
"Will you take a bottle of hair restorer
?" asked a barber of a customer.
"Not now, thank you," the latter reu'or
mor T oclr rnn whv
-"J "*v? J ' "? J? ?J
yoa don't use the hair restorer yourself
? Your locks are rather thin."
As the barber had scarcely a hair on
his head, the phrase " rather thin"
sounded like sarcasm.
"The boss doesn't allow it," explained
the barber.
"Why not? I'd think it would be a
recommendation."
"Xo; he selects only bald-headed men
to work for him, and hopes to sell his
hair restorer by having them pose as
frightful examples."?Texas SifLings.
Determined to S?I1.
"Stranger, I want to sell yer a horse."
"Stranger," was the reply, "I don't
want him."
"Stranger," rejoined the wayfarer,
"yer reely must buy him. Yer never see
a better horse for the price."
"What is the price, stranger?" asked
the contemplative man.
"A hundred and fifty dollars and dirt
cheap at that."
The inquirer meditated for a few moments
and then blandly remarked:
"Stranger, I'll give yer five."
The equestrian dismounted, saying
with earnestnes: "Stranger, I won't allow
one hundred and forty-five dollars to
stand between you and me and a trade.
The horse is yours."?Si/tings.
Wanted Insurance.
"Is this a fire insurance company ? "he
inquired as he hesitatingly entered the
nffcnn nf nnn nf tVinhoet Lrnntvn ffimnJinipS
in the country.
" Yes, sir. Anything we can do for
you ?"
"Yes. I'm a traveling man, and I've
"just got a situation. I've been unfortunate
in every other jdb T'vehud. Always struck_
dull trade you know and goFtireH. JTow,
if you will insure me against fire in this
case I'll be perfectly willing to pay whatever
is reasonable for a policy."
But the company wasn't filling that
kind of a long felt want.?Merchant Traveler.
Too Ohl.
"Say! lemmc use your telephone a
minit!" he exclaimed, as he rushed into
an office on Griswold street.
- ^ertaiiuy.
"Hello! hello! Give me 0,203. Is that
you, darling?"
("Yes.")
"Say, pet, I left my wallet on the
dresser with $250 in it. Did you find it?"
("Yes.")
"Good! 'Fraid I'd lost it on the street.
Big load off my mind. Shall I bring up
those shoes?"
("Yes.")
"I'm dead broke, you know, but perhaps
I can borrow $ "> until after dinner,
60 as not to disappoint you. Good-by,
darling."
("Good-by, sweetness.")
"Say," he said to the man at the desk,
"perhaps you overheard what I said, and
will lend me the five."
The occupant pointed over his shoulder
to the door.
"What? Skip?"
44 Yes. **
' Too'old?"
"Yes."
' Been cauglit before?"
"Yes."
' Iskip! Good-by!"?Detroit Free Press.
The Court Adjourned.
A witness was being examined before
a Dakota justice of the peace, aud in the
course of his testimony mentioned having
said to the prisoner at one time that
he had a horse he wanted to trade.
"Hey?" said the prosecuting attorney,
who was conducting the examination;
"was it that sor'l one of yours ?"
"Yes."
"Want to trade yet?"
"Don't care if I do?what you got?"
"He hasn't anything that you want,"
put in the attorney for the defense; "if
.. t ?
VUU ?<uit i v uauu i ^uu j ua a
mighty good show with my bay mare."
Order in the court room!" roared the
justice, waking up at this point. "What
was the last testimony you gave?"
said I once met the prisoner and
said to him: 'Bill, I'd like to trade you
that sor'l mare o' mine '"
"Hold on a minute," said the justice,
"you don't want to trade your sor'l yet,
I s'poses?"
"I might if I got a good chance."
"Say," continued the court, "if you
mean business I can give you jest the
elickest swap for that buckskin hoss of
mine, an' 'bout $10 to boot, that you
ever seen! This court is adjourned for
/\nf fa tkn Knrn on/1 IaaL'
UUC uuui V/Ui v\/ uiv 'yuiuu.i-A
my hoss over.?Dakota BdL
He Hated a Thief.
Late one afternoon while on the edge
of the Black Ilills country, near Buffalo
Gap, we got into conversation with a settler
and mentioned that we were going
to camp for the night down the road
about a quarter of a mile, among some
trees.
"Of course you'll do as you please,
genl'men," said the native, ''but I'll advise
you notter camp there."
"Why not?"
"D'ye see that cabin down 'bout fifty
yards from the timber you're speakin'
of?"
"Yes."
"Well, sir, the biggest thief in the
Hills lives there. If you camp there
Jie'll be sure to steal som'thin' from you
'fore mornin'."
"Is that so?"
"You bet! There's my barn back
fthere where I store my oats. For the
last two year that feller hasn't fed iiis
team a single mouthful of his own hoss
feed?been stealin' out o' mine all the
time."
1 'Should think you would do something
about it."
"Me? Well, y-a-e-s, you might think
I would, but you see the fack is durin'
all this time I've been fcediri' my team
out o' bi6 oatg?bcen &oin' down flights
after h<^s abed an* back in' 'cm up. My
team is a little heftier eaters than hi6'n
so I don't complain much. But I do
hatr a thief?T ics,' disnise 'em. Unhook
right here in front o' my house if you
j want to?this is good campin' ground."
| ?Dakota Bell.
Latul Hunting in Arkansas.
A man stopped near Patterson's Bayou
and thus addressed an old fellow who
stood with his arms resting on a fence:
"Do you live here?" he asked.
j "Don't see me dying here, do you!"
"Ah, you are sportive. I have heard
of this neighborhood, and have the
names of several people. Where is J.
' B. jtlucklc?"
"Dead."
"Ah?"
"Ah. hah."
"What was the matter with him?"
"Sick."
"What sort of sickness?"
"Swamp fever."
"Let me sec," consulting a scrap of
! paper, "where is Torn W. Buck?"
"Dead."
I "What did he die of ?"
j ''Swamp fever."
"Humph. Where can I find Sim
Bly?"
| "In thecraveyard."
"Swamp fever:"
I* "Yes."
"Do you know anything about Calvin
; Hunter?"
"Yes, laid him out.
"What was the matter with him?"
I "Swamp fever."
"My friend, I have come into this
neighborhood to buy land."
The native, smiling a welcome, replied:
"We've got the finest country on |
1 Tl 4. C%nA
earth, pocluer, ngat acre, i v? gut <tww
acres that I'll let you have."
"How does it lie.'"
"Fust rate."
"How's the water?"
"Best in the world."
"Land rich?"'
"Cream couldn't hold a lightning bug
to it." |
"IIow is this neighborhood in the
way of health':"
Sweet as a pre?lincstyou ever saw." J
"No chills?"
! "Not one." I
"Fever of any kind?" i
"Xot a fever."
! "Whatabout those fellows that died?" [
"Hah?oh, them fellers. "Why, you
see, they?they?w'y, they oughter died."
"That's all right, but I don't believe I
want any land 'round here."
"You don't! W'y, deuce take your
; ugly hide, w'y didn't you tell me at fust
I that you thought o' buyin' land an' I
' J - ,A - ?- +Vi Am fnl_
WOU1UQ X a-SUlU IIUUIIU uuuui mv,m iti- i
lcrs dyin'. Blast your hide! You go !
around the country takin' advantage o'
fellers this way. You don't know how
to treat a gentleman. Move on, now, or
I'll hurt you. Come cheatin' me out of
a sale. Move on, I tell you."?Ashinsas
Traveler.
| The Lire of a Grasshopper,
its.every one knows, it is a rule of
nature even-winged insect shall die
within the year-occasional individuals
that rurvive the twelve, months
only proving the rule), for the stage of
| wings is the last third of the creature's
| life. After all, it would be very absurd |
' if we did not recognize among ourselves
I the stages of childhood, youth, middle
age and old age, which together cover
the span of our "three score years and
| ten." An insect's stages proceed in a
' far smaller compass, and the winged one
I is the last. It is really the old age of
| the caterpillar or grub.
Thus a grasshopper may be for two or
three years a grub, for another six
months a hobbledehoy?that is, a wingi
less thing, half grub, half grasshopper?
and then for a further space a winged
grasshopper. In the last stage it marries,
and there is an end of its purpose.
Nature has no further need for it and
does not care whether it dies or not.
The slender fragility of the insect's apEearance
may have suggested a feeble
old of life; some grasshoppers look like
the mere specters of insects. About
others, too, there is a vegetable, perishable
look, as of thin grass-blades that a
frost would kill or heat shrivel up: a susfVirtif
cni'ft or?rl /ulorna
. JHUUU V-W. ?? ? to ?
that they are already beginning to
wither. But the grasshopper has nothing
to complain of as to its length of life. It
sings the summer in and the autumn out,
and goes to sleep with the year.?Gentlerami's
Magazine.
A South American Sea Duck.
! In a Barclay street store is a splendid
1 specimen of the South American loon,
stuffed by the same artist of Rochester
who has preserved Jumbo for posterity.
It is nothing but an enormous sea duck,
with a four-inch bill, sharp as a needle
aud keen as a blade. The other day a
sailor dronned in and naused admiringly
before the bird.
14 Where did he come from, shipmate ?"
"Off the coast of Brazil," the proprietor
replied.
"Well," said the old salt, 441 was
askin' because I've bet rations as I'm the
only man as ever had one o' them pesky
things in my hand alive. They're smarter
j 'n a lox, and devilish hard to shoot. We
was a sailin' the Gulf o' Mexico in the Victor
'bout ten year ago, when one of them
I critters came alongside and cast anchor
on the bowsprit. I was younger then as
I am now, and says I: ' Bird, ahoy ! Dcin
me if I don't run down that thing.' It
was nearly dark, and I feels my way cau!
tious-like along the bowsprit and grabbed
j him sudden by the neck afore lie knowed
| what was up. I'm a tellin' you it was a
job a gettin1 th;it fellow on deck. He
j cut my coat like a razor. We bound him
to the deck with a three-cord rope. He
took a loaf of bread we tossed him, and
halved it with his bill like a knife. Before
daylight he'd worked his way
j through that rope aud was gone. Blessed
if I don't b.'lieve them birds can bite
j through a lamp post."?New York Sun.
Y? Sfnrif? nf Yp Hnfrfri*.
Once in ye very olden tvrae a MerJ
chantt sayd too an Eddy tor, "I doau
j thynke advertizing payes."
"Let me show yov," said ye Eddytor,
"I pvtt 1 lyne in my Papyr aud not
charge yov a pcncie."
"All right," replied the Merchantt,
"and we will see."
So ye Eddytor pvtte ye lyne in his
papyr:
\T7"ANTED A DOGGE. John Jones, 2ii<>
VY Olde st.
Now yt happened that 400 Peple cache
brovghte a Dogge on ye next daye thereafter,
so that Mister Jones (whych was
ye Merchantt's nayrae) was overrunne
with Dogge's.
"Synce there are so manye Doggcs,"
savd he, "I thy nke I myght make some
! bysiness and will give you a pennie for
I cache Dogge."
Ye people tooke ye pennie each for
his Dogge becavse there were so manye
Doggcs, and blister Jones skynned ye
400 Dogges and made bootes and gloves
from ye 400 hydes and thvs inayd
A Bye. Fortvse,
and thereafter added to yt by advertizing
in ye Eddytor'g pap jr.?American
Grocer. ;
POPULAB SCIENCE. ]
Professor Thomson says that when the
means of utilizing the power of creating
! quick heating by electricity shall be better
understood it will be used in every
workshop for welding,forging and other
purposes.
t* *v, a nvAnnr T*n fnr pnoVi norsnn to
" 13 J? ~ ? ,
I sleep habitually till when awakening the
mind is clear, the brain is rested and the
body recuperated. Practically this cannot
always be done, but it is the condition
to be sought after; it is the purpose
for which sleep was given. The
time may be five, six, eight or twelve
hours. No time is ill spent by which
needed rest is obtained.
A natural curiosity has been discoven d
at Solothurn, Switzerland, the centre of a
large watch manufacturing district. It
is the nest of a wagtail, built wholly of
I long spiral steel shavings, with the lenst
part of vegetable or animal fibre used in
I its construction. The steel shavings are
j half a millimeter thick and about twelve
centimeters long. The nest has been
preserved in the Museum of Natural
I History.
"** "lT"? T"> /-.? r% r! Arm n ry
illilX V UI1 I'dlCUivuiiui }<b uuuiuii uivui |
cal authority, considers that cholera is
not contagious in the sense of being communicable
directly from person to person,
but that it belongs to the malarial
group of epidemics, the germs of which
find their way from the soil into the air,
and thence through the lungs into the
system. He regards good drainage and
pure water as the most efficient safeguards
again?t an outbreak.
The fifteen great American inventions ,
of world wide adoption are: 1, the
cotton-gin; 2, the planting-machine; 3,
j the grass mower and reaper; 4, the rotary <
| printing-press; 5, navigation by steam;
I (i, the hot-air engine; 7, the sewing :
i machine; 8, the india-rubber industry: i
9, the machine manufacture or ftorsc- |
shoes: 10, the sand-blast for carv- i
ing; 11, the gauge lathe; 12, the grain
elevator; 13, artificial ice-making on a
large scale; 14, the electric magnet and j
its practical application, and 13, the !
telephone.
I)r. A. B. Griffiths has demonstrated
that iron sulphate, or copperas, acts upon |
the cellulose of the microscopic fungi ;
which prey upon plants, but does not affect
that of the higher pla its themselves. !
Is is therefore a remedy for the most vir- |
ulent epidemics which attack field and
garden crops which destroy such parasitic
germs and fungi as the potato disease,
wheat mildew, etc. In one English I
' / 1 I
district tins year s cro[i ox wnua uc?uo .
has failed on account of a growth of fun- |
gus on the roots of the plants, a disease
which a timely application of iron sulphate
would have cured. It is also said
to be an efficient remedy for poison by
ivy: Dissolve a tablespoonful of copperas
in two-thirds of a teacup of boiling
water, and when cold apply with a cloth
to the poisoned places.
The curious substance known as ozone,
the nature of which was so long a mysstery,
and about which so many conflict- j
ing hypotheses have been devised, is now,
says the Lancet, becoming well known to
us. Ozone is a denser form of oxygen. I
Its specific gravity is 24, that of common
oxygen being 1G, and that of hydrogen I
1. It is highly probable that its molecules ,
contain three similar oxygen atoms. In
Al-- ir ia ft nnwnrfiil
I Lie t'UJIUCuWittlVU J31UCV. *? y WVT
irritant poison, and is very unstable, decomposing
with explosion <wid with evolution
of heat, and exerting a most powerful
action on oxidizable materials. For
some time past it has been known that it
liquifies under the influence of combined
cold and pressure. The liquor is indigo
blue, and its vapor, in a tolerably concentrated
state, has a color which can
only be compared to that of an Italian
sky. It is a very dangerous substance to
work with.
Mark Twain's Courtship.
Mark Twain has been the subject of
nrnnrl ctnrir>s in his tlav. and the
gjw- ? ? ? ?J1 ? ,
appended one from the Indianapolis
Journal, about a trying moment in his
courtship, is worth reproducing:
As every one knows, Mr. Clemens
first met his beautiful wife while on the .
famous voyage of the Quaker City, and
he pursued his acquaintance after their
return so closely that at last the young
lady's papa one day called the ardent
and devoted Mark into his private study
and said, after some preamble: "Mr.
Clemens, I have something to say to
you which bears upon a subject of grave
imfortance, at least to me and mine.
You have been coming here for some
time, and your manner leaves no doubt
' - XT,.?.
in my mina as 10 your oojcci, juu?y, j
my daughter's welfare is very, dear to
me, and before I can admit you to her
society on the footing of a suitor to her
hand, I would like to know something
more than I do about you and your antecedents,
etc. Stop a minute! You
must remember that a man may be "a
good fellow, and a pleasant companion
on a voyage and all that, but when it is
a question as grave as this a wise father
tries to take every precaution before allowing
his daughter's affections to become
engaged, and I ask of you, as a
gentleman, that you shall give mc the
nomnc cnmo nf rnnr friends in Cali
U?...w ~ ? j
fornia to whom I may write and make !
such inquiries as I deem necessary, that I
is, if you still desire our friendship." It
was now Mark Twain's turn. "Sir,"
said he, bowing profoundly, as became a
young man who respects his hoped-for
father-in-law, "your sentiments arc in
every way correct. I approve of them
myself, and hasten to add that you have
not been mistaken in my sentiments toward
your daughter, whom I may tell
you candidly seems to mc to be tnc most
perfect of her sex, and I honor your
solicitation for her welfare. I am not
only perfectly willing to give you references,
but am only too glad to have an
opportunity to do so, which my natural
modesty would have prevented mc from
offering. Therefore permit me to give
you the names of a few of my friends. I
will write them down. First is Lieutenant-General
John McComb, Alexander
Badlam, General J ander and Colonel
w IT r TL-Ill nil tin fnr
me just as I would for thcin under like
circumstances." This conclusion broke
the old man all up, and he never asked
more reference nor wrote to those gentlemen.
Fonl Air and Pulmonary Diseases.
The great anatomist, Langcnbcck,
says: I am sure now of what I t-uspected
long ago, viz.: That pulmonary diseases
are nearly exclusively (if we except
tuberculous tendencies inherited from
parents, I say quite exclusively) produced
by the breathing of foul air. The
lungs of all persons, miners included,
who had worked for some years in close
workshops and dusty factories, showed
the germs of the fatal disease; while even
confirmed inebriates, who had passed
their davs in open air, had preserved
their respiratory organs intaet, whatever I
inroads their excesses had made on the '
rest of their system. If I should go into
practice, and undertake the cure ofa consumptive,
I should begin by driving him ?
out, and prevent him from entering a j
house for'a year or two.?Sanitary Era. j
I ON THE PAMPAS.
I
' FEATURES OF LIFE IN THE
ARGENTINE REPUBLIC.
No Middle Class?The National Bev
erase?Gauchos?Bands of Fleet.
Ostriches?Fertile PlainsAnimal
Discomforts.
mi __ ;n
inure IS uu IIIIUUIU iiaoo iu ?.?Argentine
republic, writes a correspondent
of the San Francisco Chronicle.
Society i9 composed of tho?e wealthy
enough to refrain from manral labor and
working people. Wages as a rule arc
low, ancl the cost of living as high as in
the United States and not half as good.
In the "camps" peons engaged in herding
are paid from $9 to $12 per month
and supplied with meat and matte.
Should they wish to vary this diet it must
be done at their own expense. Few care
to do so. Matte is a peculiar herb grown
J in Paraguay, and is the national beverage
of the country. It is dried, powdered
and steeped in hot water and used as a
tea. It possesses considerable stimulating
powers, and enormous quantities arc consumed.
All classes use it. A erourd is
hollowed and filled with matte, a tube to
suck through inserted and the contents
absorbed. It is considered a serious
| breach of etiquette to refuse the matte
j cup when it is passed around. The same
tube passes from mouth to month!
Skilled labor docs not command high
I wages. Locomotive drivers receive from
$05 to $75 a month; guards or conductors,
$45; good mechanics average $2.50
a day. When the value of Argentine
money is reckoned, these are low wages.
A constant speculation in gold is carried
on, and the value of national money constantly
fluctuates.
Certain professions are well paid. Dent'sts,
photographers, civil engineers and
school teachers lind occupation and make
money. A laboring man entering the republic
finds himself thrown into coinpewtfK
lmnrrrvr VinrrlnQ of tJlG
l/IUUU ??tll -
Old World, and must accustom himself
to strict economy and hard living to gel
along. The Italians employed on the
streets or in the public wo. its are paid
$1.25 a day. This is the rate for ordinary
labor. Stevedores and men around
the docks not steadily employed, $1.50
and board; clerks, from $30 to $70 per
month. A knowledge of Spanish is absolutely
required of the latter.
The country maintains a standing army
of 18,000 men and has a good navy, comprising
several powerful armored ships.
Military distinction is eagerly sought and
flm crtnq nf rir-li futilities enter the ser
vice. It is not unusual to see boys of 14
and 15 years wearing officers' uniforms.
English, Germans and French nre found
among the officers. The total population
of the couutry is estimated at.10,000,000.
House vent is excessively high and city
property held at exorbitant figures. The
same may he said of outlying lands. Compared
with price? a few years ago, their
valuation is excessive, and a crash is inevitable.
Camp lands for grazing purposes
in remote districts se^from $10,000
to $i5,000 per square league. The
country is generally level from the coastline
back to the Andes. The average rise
in altitude is four inches to the mile.
This is the region of pampas, vast treeless
lrttLC, covered with grasses and comprising
rich soiii.
T*fnrnlnrn HllGS
i t?UUVJl in W JUivigu I
touch at Buenos Ayres, and thoue&nds
of immigrants arc landed yearly. Fast'
and well-equipped river-boats navigate
the Uruguay, Parany and Platte rivers.
At Sante Fe I met two English gentlemen
who wished to make the trip.
Securing horses and a guide, a start was
made the second morning, and in a few
hours we were away from civilization,
ana crossing xnc vast piams.
I can liken the pampas to nothing except
a smooth ocean; their vastness,
monotony and utter lonoliness is oppressive,
ana the traveler gazes yearningly
for some object to rest the eye. Overhead
a blue, cloudless sky shone, the air
was intensely hot, and the only noise
made was that of the horses amid the
tall grass.
Two or three times during the day isolated
mud huts were sighted, and at one
of these we procured water and camped
for the night. These arc headquarters
for the cuttle-herders ? wild-looking
TTiIvnrl Klnn/1 onfl trilWllftnt
guuuuua vi UIIAWU w?wv4 ? ?
visage. These dwellers of the pampas
are almost constantly in the saddle. They
wear the universil poncho?a square,colored
blanket, slit in the middle to admit
the head?and armed with lassoes
and long knives. An ignorant, wild,
savage race, with no great love for foreigners,
they still retain considerable respect
for the "Gringo" six-shooter and
rarely molest travelers unless excited by
drink.
The second day an early start was
made, bands of ostriches were sighted,
but at such a distance a shot could not
be obtained. The South American bird
is not so large as his African cousin, but
good sized, and possesses tremendous
rri
powers oi locomotion. iiicjfuiuvv; ?uu
the rapidity of express trains when frightened,
their long legs making enormous
strides, with a curious side motion. We
saw many iguanas?great lizards?some
of them four feet in length, and many
armadillos, both esteemed delicious eating
by the natives.
Occasionally during our trip small iso- j
lated groves were passed. The tree? are
small, and can sometimes be seen twenty
miles away inverted in the air, the heat
and rarified atmosphere causing mirages.
Scorpions and centipedes abound, but
arc not particularly troublesome. Poisonous
reptiles are few, but mosquitoes and
black gnats make up in discomfort what
the traveler misses in this respect.
The fifth day after leaving Santa Fe
we saw from our camp the sun setting I
behind the Cordoba Sierras, a broken,
isolated mountain chain some hundreds
of miles ?n lengh, and with altitudes
ranging from 1,000 to 3,000 feet. These
mountains, magnified in an exquisitely
clear atmosphere, loo-n grandly in the
west. Several streams rising in the range
flow eastward, and sink during dry
weather in tne heated piams.
The Whistling Tree.
In the great forests of Nubia grows a
tree, from which, when swayed by the
wind, come strange sounds, like the
noise of a flute, a fife or a penny whistle.
This vocal tree is regarded with superstitious
terror by the natives, mid it has
been a puzzle to every one who has heard
the mysterious sounds, until some scientific
traveler investigated the matter.
He found that at certain seasons of the
year hordes oi insects deposited their
eggs on the young shoots and extremities
of the branches. These produced
gall-like excrescences about an inch in
diameter. When the young insects
emerge small holes are lett in the galls.
The wind blowing through these little
apertures causes the strange noises. It |
is probably the only instance cf a tree
which bears penny whistles.
Rains and floods have interfered with
the rice harvest in Louisiana and Georgia, j
A Planet Taken with Convulsions.
A correspondent of the Pvmeer Press,
of India, gives the following account of
"facts as witnessed by myself, wife and
two Mahommedan servants, all four seeing
the phenomenon simultaneously, and
not for a miunte or so, but for upward
> of an hour:" "At about 8:30 o'clock in
the evening, while sitting at dinner, one
of my khitmutgars came in from the outside
and said: 'Sir, just step out and
see what a tamasha is taking place with
the star Sook'?the native name for
Venus. Out we went, and sure enough,
there was Venus, large and bright, but.
strange to say, tailing two, tnree ana
four feet at a time, then oscillating from
right to left; sometimes (lashing to the
right and then to the left several feet at
a time. These movements continued in
rapid succession, and were plainly apparent
to all at once; but this was not all.
Venus, when we first saw her, was, say,
apparently some four hundred yards
| above horizon. While watching her, we
observed a star (some two yards, to look
at) above suddenly fall into Venus and
there remain. We were amazed. The
natives exclaimed: 'The hist day is at
hand.' and so on. We wnt.'-hed Venus
rapidly descending until she dipped the
horizon. At times she appeared her usual
? 1 A<vAin linrrl 1 TT
Size itliu IJUllU 1)1 11I, men agnm uniuij
visible. Perhaps the phenomenon described
cau be explained by some one
versed in astronomy. I again repeat
that what has been described was seen by
myself, wife and two native servants,
and could by no means have been imagination."
In It Not Slntalar
That consumptives should be leas*- appresensive
of their own condition, while all their
friends are urging and beseeching them to be
more careful about exposure and overdoing. It
may well be considered one of the most alarming
symptoms of the disease, where the patient
is reckless and will not believe that he is in
danger. Reader, if you are in this condition,
do not neglect the only means of recovery.
Avoid exposure and fatigue, be regular in your
habits, imd use faithfully of Dr. Pierce's
"(Jolden Mcdical Discovery." It has saved
thousands who were steadily failing.
THE Dlrtns recorueu in i,onaon every ween
exceed I lie deaths by more than a thousand,
and during the next ten years the increase in
the number of inhabitants will probably be
nearly three-quarters of a million.
T ennt fill Women
Are made pallid unattractive by functional
irregularities which Dr. Pierce's "Favorite
I Prescription" will infallibly cure. Thousands
of testimonials. By druggists.
Japanese ladies are rapidly adopting the
European fashion of dress.
Don't hawk, .liawjt, blow, spit, and disgust
everybody with'your offensive breath, but use
Ul'm ? v^uuirm iwiwruj anu cuu u.
The Gentile votes of Utah are about 15 per
cent, of the whole number.
If afflicted with sore eyes use Dr. Isaac Thomoson'a
Eye-water. Druggists sell at25c. per bottle
'Roval Glue' mends anything! Broken Chi.
na. Glass, Wood. Free Viala at Drags & Gro
The best cough mcdiclne is Piso's Cure for
Consumption. Bold everywhere. 25c.
Nervous People
Who take Hood's Sarsaparllla earnestly dcclare: 'It
give* us complete and permanent control of our
nerves." By regulating the digestion it also overcome
dyspepsia arid disagreeable feelings tn the
sfmiacli, cures headache and heartburn. By Its action
on the blood Impurities are expelled and the whole
body Is benefited.
"I never can thank Hood's Sorsaparllla for helping
?- < T ?*aa /tnnflnAd
me so much, waenioegoo v?>u|i..nU
to the bed nearly all the time Nov* I am up the belt
part of the day, have a better appetite than for flva
yean, and am not nearly so nervous as I have been."
Mrs. Ann A. Hailer, Nlcetowa, Philadelphia.
Hood's Sarsaparilla
j Sold by all druggists. $1; six for $S. Prepared only
| by C. I. HOOD & CO., Apothecaries, Lowell, Haas.
- tOO Doses One Dollar
COCKLE'S
ANTI-BILIOUS
PILLS,
THE GREAT ENGLISH REMEDY
For Liver. Bile. Indigestion, ctc. Free_ from Mer
curv; contains onlv Pure Vegetable mgreaienw.
Agent: C. N. CRITTENTON, New York.
LIVER, BL(
Mrs. Mart A. Mc
Ill/PR MKACF writes: "Iaddresae
UVLn UlwLAut ln regrard my he)
lun liver disease, heart t
? Wu ness. I was advia
nPART IRnilRIF Golden Medical D
nun I inUUDLC. aeration and Pelie
of the ' Prescriptioi
ery,' and four of the' Pleasant Purgativi
gran to improve under the use of your mi
came back. My difficulties have all disapj
all day, or walk four or Ave miles a day, am
I began using the medicine I could scarce
most of the time, and I did not think I cc
I have a little baby girl eight months old.
j-n?i" onrl onnMrnniw. Hhe 1n hoa
IUCiiV^iu? J*-* -rr-7"~-? VT ,
dies all the credit for curing me, as I took
i kctrinning their use. I am very gratefu
thank God and thank you that I am as
if suffering. ^ ^ y Wkbbir, of To
i ..... 1% writes: "I wish toe
LlVFR of your 'Golden Medical I
Purgative Pelleta.' For
taking them I was a gr
UIOLAOL. Bovcro pain In my right
moJ unable to do my own wo
I am now well and strong, thanks to yo
Chronic Diarrhea Cured.?D. Lj
Decatur Street, New Orleans, La., writes:
the 'Golden Medical Discovery,' and it t
diarrhea. Mv bowels are now regular."
" THE
Thoroughly cleanse the blood, whic
digestion, a fair skin, buoyant spirits, t
Golden Medical Discovery cures ail
poison. Especially has it proven Its e
and Swellings, Enlarged Glands, and Et
Rev. F. AsnnitY Hern
NMfiFSTiON Church of Silvcrton, 1
inUlbCd IIUII fl)cted wlth catarrh on<
flOII ? blotches began to aris
wuik?i| skin, and I experienc
HI OTfiHP^ dullness. I began tl
DLUIunto. Golden Medical Disc
him for such complai
time I began to roci jiku u uew nmu, unu ,
The 4 Pleasant Purgati vo Polleta' are the b
sick headache, or tightness about the chc
mouth, that I have ever used. My wife cr
floor when she began to take your 'Golc
Now she can walk quito a little ways, anc
I n7T n Mrs. Ida M. Strong, of
Hip-Joint b?y,md ^en
I ' diseaso for two years. V
flierier use of your 'Golden J
UiOCAOb. 'Pellets, he was confine
not be moved without sn
now, thanks to your' Discovery,' he is at
CONSUMPTION,
Golden' Medical Discovery cures
ting and nutritive properties. For W<
and kindred affections, it is a sovereij
and purifies the blood.
It rapidly builds up the system, and
"wasting diseases."
Consumption.?Mrs. Edward New
Out., writes: " You wili ever be praised 1
bio cure in my case. I was so reduced I
given mo up. and I had also been given up
went to the best doctor in these parta. H
was only a punishment in my case, and v
treat me. Ho said I migh
n?,r? ||n "ked. as that was the only
UliEN UP bly have any curative powi
_ far advanced. I tried the
Tfl llIC treatment, but I was so w<
1 u """ on my stomach. My husbn
to give me up vet, though
everything he saw advertised for iny comr
..... * ? r:?Mr>r> Xf<-ill>nl T)lspo\-orv * 1
and. to'tho surprise of everybody, am*to-di
and nra entirely free from that terrible eon
nil?ht and day. I have been afflicted with rl
of years, ana now feel so much better thti
tinuation of your'Golden Mcdical Disco\
to perfect health. I would say to those w
that terrible disease consumption, do not
thing else first; but take tho'Golden Me
early staa-'.-s of the disease, and thereby sn
ferine and be restored to health at one
still in doubt, need but write me, ino
addressed envelope for reply, when the f<
be fully substantiated by me."
Ulcer Cured.?Tsaac E. Downs. E
Jiochiand C<>., X. Y. (P. O. Box 558), writes
Golden Medical Dlseorery is !
WORLD'S
pjlys 31 catarrh
lilfeih ay- fever
W/Wm cure
ELY'S CRGAH BALM.
Apply Balm into each nostril.
KIDDER'S
A KllKE UI KK run
INDIGESTION and DYSPEPSIA.
Orcr 5,000 Physicians have sent us their approval of
DIGESTYLIN, saylne that It la the best preparation
for Indigestion that they have ever used.
We have never heard of a case of Dyspepsia where
DIGESTYLIN was taken that was not cured.
FOR CHOLERA INFANTUM.
IT WILL CURE THE iMOST AGGRAVATED CASES.
IT WILL STOP VOMITING IN PREGNANCY.
IT WILL RELIEVE CONSTIPATION.
For Summer Complaint* and Chroule Diarrhoea,
which are the direct results of Imperfect digestion,
DIGESTYLIN will effect an Immediate cure.
Take DYGESTYLIN for all pains and disorders of
the stomach ; they all come from Indigestion. Ask
vour druggist for DIGESTYLIN (price $1 per large
bottle). Ir he does not have It send one dollar to us
and we will send a bottle to you. express prepaid.
Do not hesitate to send your money. Our bouse U
reliable. Established twentv-flve years.
W1H. F. KIDDER CO.,
Manufacturing G'heiuUtw, 83 John St., N.V.
J ON E S
PA YS theF R EIC H T
yy 5 Ton Wagon Scales^
Tare Brum and' Brim Box for
Ettrr iti^?l?. For Trrtpr,*elilt
T^"7 \^jEW?j^k,' jaer.tloo thin Piper and addre??
r <. W51 V JO"" OF BiNOHAMTIN.
? * BINUHAMTON. N. ?.
wJIUUVa'C
Jlfulal orPbyilrai Wrilmta* thai Botanic
Herrr Rllterifiiltocuri. 50 Cm. Herb Medicine Co.
13 N. lllh HI.. Philadelphia, IV. Sold by all Druggist*.
Piso's Remedy for Catarrh 1b the K
Beet, Easiest to Use, and Cheapest
IH Sold by drnKjn'Bts or s?nt by maiL
m 50c. E. T. Hazeltiue, Warren, Pa.
PATENTS
F. A. LKHM ANN, Solicitor o? Patkxts. W*?hlnston. D
C. No charge nnlt?> patent li tccured. Send for Circular
DATENTS Procured at LESS
P'M I kll I W cost than obtainable elseI
where. Best of references and Inventors' Guide
mailed free. JAMES II. LAXCASTKIC, Patent
Attorney, 187 Hromhvnyi K. V. City.
H AI nirnC *11 (*t Pemlom, 1! M (tlatVIII
I llr K\bled: Offlcera* travel tiny,
0ULUILI Iw bounty collected; Dcnerters
^relieved; 22 yearV practice. Succtss or no fee.
Laws icut fre?. A. "W. KcCormick & Son. IWblnctoitD.Cj
HOMCEOPATHIC HOSPITAL College. Cleveland,
O. Session of 1SS7-8 beKl'is Sept. 28. For catalogue
address William T. Miller, Sf. I)., 6fit Superior Street.
DIaiJa Dill A Great English Gout and
Dlall S rillSa Rheumatic Remedy.
uvm isoXf j*i| rouua?
... ill Ilnbit Cured. Treatment sent on trial.
OPIUM HUMANE ItEMEDY CO- Lafuyette. Ind.
GOLD Is worth $S00 i>er pound,
$1,1)00, but is sold at 25 cento a box b) dealers.
I AP to 89 a day..Samples worth#1 JO. FREE
Ik B% Llues not under the horse s feet. W nta
! ^ J BrewntiT Safety Rein llolder Co., Holly. Mich.
AMHRI Morphine Habit Cnrrd In 10
RIDIHEb (o 20 day*. No pay till cured.
UllUtfl Ur J- ku-pheiiH, Lebanon, Ohio.
iISEEIi
The FISH BRAND SL
S2S:
THREE
I iPmI*
I luiau uiuuaiu wi qic
)0D AND LUNG
Club*. Columbus, S"an?;, _Mrfl.
d you in November, 18&4, I h?N?|]|t
ilUi, being afflicted with I ??-ni.ii*i. chiUB.
rouble, and female weak- I (lcDII ITV ?oro tl
ed to use Dr. Piercefl I U?jjlLjlI? My li\
iacoVfery, Favorite Pre- dyapep
it*. I used one bottle Medical Discovery' a
n five of the 'DIbcov- ailmenta and I cannc
? Pol lata ' Mv health hA- ??o o wnrH In w?forpi
sdlcine, and my strength has proven itself a r
? caf> w0 j u ^ It has been used In n
t stand it well; and when
ly walk across the room, Dy?pep?ia.?Jah
uid ever feel well again. Minn., writes: "I wa
Although she is aiittle heartily and grow pooi
lthy. I give your rcme- sour stomach, and mi
no other treatment after to 1
1 for your kindness, and luuiAnniTr* lGo
well as I am after years INVIGORATES 1 aE
a am,
rkehire, Cattaraugus Co., THE SYSTEM flv0
ay a few words in nrnisn viwium. ono
)iscovery' and ' Pleasant mm
five years previous to done in the same lei
eat sufferer; I had a medicine that eeemci
side continually; wns whole system equ
,(Dy.pep.?a.-THE
" * woo fi<AiihlnH Ann
lZarrb, Esq., *75 and f77 sleeplessness, but youj
"I used three bottles of Clillls and Fev<
ias cured me of chronic writes: "Last Augusi
I took your 'Discover;
BLOOD IS THE
h is the fountain of health, by using Dr. Piei
tnd bodily health and vigor will bo established
humors, from the common pimple, blotch, or <
fflcacy in curing Salt-rheum or Tetter, Fever-,
iting Ulcers.
r.T. ~Pnstnr nt the. M. K. I and can walk with the
V. J., says: I was af- P?un, ana can eat ana
1 indigestion. Boils and about three months s
0 on the surface of the I cannot find words
ed a tired feeling and benefit he has receive*
10 use of Dr. Pierce's
overy aa directed by I ' SL
Ints, and in one week's I i TcDDIDI r I?' 1
am now sound and well. I A I tnnluLL 8 Ann
est remedy for bilious or I I i?'?m
st, and bad taste in the I AFFL CTION. I of a
>uld not walk across the Golc
len Medical Discovery.' pear
1 do some light work/' covering the whole of
attacked the elbows ?
Aiiwcorth, Tnd., writes: After being treated b;
troubled with hip-joint commenced the use o'
'i-"" """mnnnoH !,? boiran to mend and Is
ledical Discovery' and the medicine has suve<
d to his bed, ana could Mr. T. A. Ayres, of
fferinj? gTent pnin. But vouches for tho above
ile to bo up all the time,
WEAK LUNGS, SPI1
Consumption (which is Scrofula of the Lunjr6), b
;ak Lungs, Spitting of Blood, Shortness or Brc
?n remedy. While it promptly cures the sev
Increases tho flesh and weight of those reduce
- ? I ' hna
t^Pine for the'wHnorka- oSTthe thigh.' After tr;
Pty friinrtfl^Sd ^1 procured three bottlca
W'^fcrtSS'ltbS per-eetiy." Mr. Down
e told mo thnt medicine
r?i? & sjMft'f
thing thnt could possi- Pr ""'
er over consumption so Winrrn Tn
Cod liver oil as a last fffiOltU IU
;ok I could not keep it PTnu ftJ,"
nd. not feeling satisfied uKELETOM. then
lie hud bought for mo v.onf
)l"int, procured a qunn- . . - months* trea
[ took onlv four bottles. t?ok ...n
iy doing1 my own work, ?',!? ,Bunui wh Vk *t
g-h which harraesed mo *"'?f
leumatism for a number S .""" n? T, /,! u 15^
it I believe, with aeon- Tn fW i^tin ?h? c?Iu!,
cry,' I will be restored tip 0,6 8calcj
ho are falling a prey to o,,r nrineinni roiinr,
do as T did, take every- t hp " r^nln^l r
dical Discovery'in the wus the Golden Medi
ve a (rreat deal of suf- _
losing a stamped, self- Bleeding |-$
' from luhss. ^
6q., of Svring Valley, ^"hmI she
: "The'Golden Jlcdi- discontinued it."
Sold by Drnpgisls. Price $1.00 per Bo
DISPENSARY MEDICAL ASSOCIATI
Ko. 663 9
- v-?gj
1 1 1 EO^SfwggSS
1
Don't allow yourself 10 oreaK. Keep op *
Youth, Health, Vigor. At first signs of going *
back, be (fin use of wells' Health Rskewd.
For weak men, delicate women. Renews energy.
Cures Dyspepsia, Mental or PUvaical . "2^2
Weakness, Nervous and General Debility. v>
Fever and Ague. Nice to take, true merit, tmequaled
forTORPID LIVER and NIQHT
8WEAT8, Leanness, Nervous Prostration,
heavy labored or restless sleep, exhausted,
tired, languid, faint, "ALL GONE" feelinr,
distress in the back or bead. "Wind on bowels
or stomach. $1,8 for *5. Druggists or Express.
E. 8. Wells. JersevOitv.N. J.. U. 8. A.
IT?P~36
M CURES WHERE -ALL ELSE FAILS. ?
U Boat Cough Syrup, Tasiaa good. Vm PI
E Id time. Sold by draa*l*t*. -B_
PlBO'S CuitE FOR CONbtjmption
is free from
Opium in any form, and
therefore perfectly safe.
, If yon have a cough without
disease of the lungs,
so much the better. A few .,
doses are all you need. But
if you neglect this easy
means of safety, the slight
I cough may become a seri- '
ous matter and several
bottles will be required.
It carmot be aborted that
every case of Consumption may
be cured by this medicine, but
it is true that thousands of Uvea
will be saved if they do not dolay
too long.
By druggists. 25c.
FRAZERg#M
BEST IN THE WORLD U II L O b ' ;.V
DP" Oct tlio Genuine. 5Wd Ercr-where. 42"
CKER?
ICKEB la wamiitcd'wstoproot tad wltl k?cp 70a d>T
rha neir 1'OMMEL 8UCK?H la ap?rf?*ridingco*i,
ddle. BMraraoflrolutlona. Kon?scnalne withoutthe
rk. IIIu?tTited Catalogue frea. A J.Towrr, Boiton^Iaa,
m
DYSPEPSIA, I 3
1CK HEADACHE. MB
coNSTiPAiron, g
A Remedy for all Diseases of the 14rer, H*?
rneya, Slomnch and Bowels. A poiIUtcH
cure for DyipepiU, Sick BemdM,! Tl
Constipation. Dose, one to two teaspoonfall.
; 10 and 2". cts. No genuine lilU sold la bul&B
SIMON N. JONES, Manager. LaaUvllle, K* I
DISEASES. |
Pabmblia Brundagx, of 161 Lock Strut,
wU N. Y. writes: " I wna troubled .with
nervous and general debility, with frequent
iroat, and my mouth waa badly cankered.
er waa inactive, and I suffered much from
isia. I am pleased to say that your 'Golden
ind 'Pellets' Have curea me or tui mew
it say enough In their praise. I must also
ace to your 'Favorite Prescription,' as li
nost excellent medicine for weak femalet,
iy family with excellent results." s,
e8 L. Colby, Esq., of Yucatan, Houston Co,
s troubled with indigestion, and would eat
r at the same tame. I experienced heartburn,
my other disagreeable symptoms common
;hat disorder. I commenced taking your
lden Medical Discovery* and 'Pellets,rand
a now entirely free from the dyspepsia, and
In fact, healthier than I have been for
years. I weigh one hundred and seventyand
one-hair pounds, and have done si
:h work the past summer as I have ever
lgth of time in my life. I never took a
a < ??? im ikA mnoolna onH InxrlcMratA
I IU U/UO Up bll? utuovivu ??
ial to your 4 Discovery' and 'Pclleta.
resa A. Cass, of Sprlnqftdd, Mo., write*:
year with liver complaint, dyspepsia, and
r 'Golden Medical Discovery' cured me."j
>r.?Rev. H. E. Moslet, Montmnrenci, S.
II thought I would die with chills and fever.
y' and it stopped them in a very short time,"
: LIFE." |
oe's Golden Medical Disoovcry, and good
>ruptlon. to the worst Scrofula, or bloodsores,
Hip-joint Disease, Scrofulous Sorefl
i help of crutches. He does not suffer any
? ? 1 ?? tkoa anltr vvaom
oiut,'p aa nut <u out uut. j.%, mhs vu^ i^.vh
ince be commenced using your medicina.
'ith which to express my gratitude lor ttm
3 through you."
:iu DIsea?e??The "Democrat and News,"
Zambridfje, Maryland, says: "Mrs. Eliza
Poole, wife of Leonard Poole, of Tl'tlsburg,
Dorchcstcr Co., Md., has been cured
bad case of Eczema by using Dr. Pierce's
len Medical Discovery. The disease aped
first in her feet, extended to the kneeii,
the lower limbs from feet to knees, then
ind became so severe as to prostrate her.
7 several physicians for a year or two she
f the medicine named above. She sooa
now well and hearty. Mrs. Poole thinlu
J her life and prolonged her duya."
East New Market, Dorchester County, AfcL,
1UC15.
TING OF BLOOD.
y its wonderful blood-purif.vitifr, invisrora ath,
Bronchitis, Severe Coughs. Asthma,
erest Coughs it strengthens the system
d below the usual standard of health by
id my daughter of a very bad ulcer located
>ing almost everything without success, wa
i of your ' Discovery, which healed it up
s continues:
tid Heart Disease.?"I also wish to
inrkablc cure vou have effected in ray case,
three ycare I uud Buffered from that tcrridisease,
consumption, and heart disease,
ire consulting1 you I had wasted away to
Icton: could not sleep nor rest, and many
8 wished to die to be out of my misery. I
consulted you, and you told me you bad
8 of curing1 me, but it would tako time. I
tment in all. Tho first two months 1 was
iu Id not perceive any favorable symptoms,
began to pick up in flesh and strength. I
v, step by stop, the signs and realities of
lually but surely developed themselves,
s at one hundred and sixty, and am well
ce in curing Mr. Downs' terrible disease
cal Discovery."
seph F. McFAnLANT, Eeq., Athens, La,,
eg: "My wife had frequent bleeding from
lungs before she commenced using your
Iden Medical Discovery.' She has not
any since its use. For 6ome six months
has been feeling so well that she has
ittle, or Six Bottles for $5.00.
ON, rroprioiors,
fain Street, BUFFALO, X. Y.