The gamecock. (Columbia, S.C.) 1908-2006, February 14, 2001, Page 5, Image 5
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This Week in USC History
Feb. 14, 1983 — The Carolina Coliseum housed two lively
concerts: singer Pat Benatar and the legendary
country group Alabama.
I Valentine’s Day comes but once a year, and in honor of this year’s holiday, Spotlight is celebrating the
wonderful, joyous act of sex. Everybody does it... or something kinda close. So skip the candy, flowers and stuffed
animals—grab The Gamecock, cozy up with your favorite partner, take this quiz and find out...
How thrilling is your sex life?
DIRECTIONS: Give yourself a point for each question you truthfully answer in the affirmative.
Total possible points: 50. E-mail your score to gamecockspotlight@hotmail.com, and we’ll print the
average USC student’s score in Friday’s edition.
“I don’t mind where people make love,
so long as they don’t do it in the street
and frighten the horses ...”
— Mrs. Patrick Campbell
“Memory is like an orgasm — it’s a lot
better if you don’t have to fake it.”
— Seymour Gray
HAVE YOU EVER:
“‘Tis better to have loved and lost than
to live with that bitch/bastard for the
rest of your life.”
— D. C. Moore
HAVE YOU EVER:
_ Given or received oral sex in
an automobile?
_ Had sex in a building on
campus that isn’t a dorm?
_ Had sex on USC green
space?
_ Had sex on the State House
grounds?
_ Had sex underneath a
Confederate flag?
_ Had sex in dorm showers?
_ Had sex while your
roommate was in the room?
_ Had sex while riding public
transportation?
_ Been caught having sex by
a roommate or RA?
_ Had sex with your socks on?
_ Prematurely ejaculated?
_ Faked an orgasm?
- Faked an orgasm badly?
- Participated in S&M?
_ Swallowed someone else’s
bodily fluids?
_ Talked to your parents on
the phone during sex?
_ Had neighbors file noise
complaints against you?
_ Broken a limb during sex?
S '■1 “ - '' ... “ |-1
I l_
“When authorities warn you of the
sinfulness of sex, there is an important
lesson to be learned: Do not have sex
with the authorities.”
— Matt Groening
HAVE YOU EVER:
_ Walked in on your parents
having sex?
_ Been the “other lover”?
_ Had a one-night stand?
_ Not known or remembered
the name of your partner?
- Called out someone else’s
name during sex?
- Done the “walk of shame”?
_ Been propositioned
outside Waffle House?
_ Spontaneously orgasmed?
Think this quiz is dirty?
That’s because Iht (BamtCOCk is.
Visit www.dailygamecock.com to see
how some Gamecock staff members scored.
“No one is more carnal than a recent
virgin.”
— John Steinbeck
HAVE YOU EVER:
_ Had cybersex?
_ Been a stalker?
_ Fantasized about a
Gamecock staff member?
- Streaked across part of
campus?
_ Been convicted of indecent
exposure?
- Been caught masturbating?
_._
0-5: You’re definitely lying about something.
* 6-10: You’re a freak-in-training.
' ' 11 -20: You’re a freak, but within the legal limits.
21-30: You should be ashamed to look your mother
in the eye'
31 or higher: You’re so damn dirty, you should run
for political office.
HAVE YOU EVER:
_ Had sex with a USC
athlete?
_ Had sex with a mascot?
_ Had sex with a wannabe
rock star?
_ Had sex with a professor or
administrator?
$
_ Had sex with a Student
Government member?
__ Had sex with your
roommate?
_ Had sex with a cow? What
was the Clemson student’s
major?
_ Had sex with a minor?
_ Been arrested for having
sex with a minor?
_ Talked on the phone to your
gf/bf while receiving oral
sex from another person?
_ Hooked up with a Zipsheet
guy?
_ Had sex with a virgin?
_ Had sex with a relative?
_ Had your roommate make
sexual advances toward
you?
_ Had sex with more than one
person at a time?
_ Had sex with a television or
radio personality?
_ Had sex with a married
person?
_ Slept with someone at least
10 years your senior?
:o
Valentine’s Day experience?
COMPILED BY ZEINA MAKKY
The Gamecock
For. some people, Valentine’s Day isn’t all roses. There’s at
least one holiday when you’ve sat alone ...or one occasion
when your dale didn’t show ... or one time that the only
flowers you got were from your dad. To celebrate Valentine’s
Day for the romantically challenged, we’re, spotlighting some
off the worst Valentine’s Day experiences of USC students.
That gushy kind of love
“[My date] spilled a glass of water
[on my crotch],” says a student who
refused to give his name or more details.
— Anonymous
Neither snow nor rain, nor
heat nor gloom of night,
stays these couriers, as
long as she’s awake
“It happened eight years ago. There
was this girl called Susan that I was
seeing casually. [That year) Valentine’s
Day happened to be on a Sunday, and I
was going out of town that weekend. So
I had arranged to have flowers
delivered for her.”
Unfortunately, when he got back
home, “there was no message on my
answering machine from her to
acknowledge that she had received the
‘How do you know love is gone? If you said that
you would be there at 7, and you get there by 9,
and he or she has not called the police, it’s gone.’
Marlene Dietrich
actress and singer
flowers... I spoke with her on the phone
Monday and at no point in the
conversation did the flowers come up. I
was very nervous.”
“1 finally got the courage to ask her
[about them]. She said, ‘Oh, that’s what
it w;is! Somebody knocked on the door,
but I was too tired to get up and answer.’
She never got the flowers.”
— David Hardee
first-year College of Journalism
and May Communications student
Father knows best
“He sent the gift through his cousin,”
which turned out to be a teddy bear her
boyfriend’s father had bought. .
“So I told him to kiss my butt,”
Briggs said. His excuse for not giving her
the gift himself was, “I couldn’t find you.”
“[That’s when] I gave him the
finger,” she said.
— Antionette Briggs
second-yc;ir College of Journalism
;uid Mas Communications student
Breaking up is hard to do
“(My ex-boyfriend and I] had plans
to go somewhere, but he never showed
up. I was stood up.”
“The next day, he called and said he
had no money.” But in fact, he had spent
the day with friends.
“We broke up. I was very hurt
because I didn’t think he could do
something like that. You don’t need
money to spend the day with someone
who is special to you.”
— Kanitra Clybum
third-year School of Nursing student
“Two years ago I had been dating this
girl for five months, and she broke up
with me a week before Valentine’s day.
She decided to get back with her ex.”
— Terry Peterson
third-year .ichool of Business student