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Harris saves LIGHTS, CAMERA, REACTION i By Stephen Brown * When you put pre-adolescent boys together, on the ] brink of some of the biggest changes they will face in life, there are almost always two topics brought up in j conversation: girls and sex. Richard Benjamin's new comedy Milk Money fol- j lows three inquisitive boys who formulate a plan at a : spend-the-night party: Desperate to see a real naked " y ii_i*? 3 ? x ?i 1 ?j i.u~ woman, mey noia a iuna raiser ai scnooi aim uuwe mc money to the big city. After several rejections from women who find the kids' proposition less than ap- < propriate, the three meet a hooker named V, who ] needs the money and sees the innocence of the boys' quest. She obliges, discreetly of course, assuming she will never see them again. "You all aren't hairy enough to be dangerous," she tells them. Since the boys' bikes get stolen, V gives them a ride back to their suburban neighborhood and drops them off into Norman Rockwell Land. Her eyes light up as she sees happy families, but she knows she will never be a part of this world. T J+fln finao oV>q trinw that oho is Haalincr with Frank I Jl 1,1.1 c- uwo OXXV/ OIIVM U1UV wuv w . . .p ? ? (Michael Patrick Carter) who has never had a mother and thinks she will be a perfect wife for his father Tom (Ed Harris of The Firm) to marry his newfound lady friend. Convinced V is a math tutor, the reclusive scientist Tom begins to date her and feels himself coming to life again. Meanwhile, Frank hides V Willis bombs i LIGHTS, CAMERA, REACTION By Stephen Brown Bruce Willis' latest action film is a change of pace from his usual shoot 'em up adventures. It is a change of pace so highly calculated that minutes, even seconds, become accentuated to grand proportions as rampant boredom kicks in at varying velocities. Billed as an erotic thriller to draw in the Basic Instinct crowd and co-starring the sexy Jane March to add more bang for the buck, Color of Night is a bland void of inconsequential activity by shallow characters. Willis plays Dr. Bill Capa, who flees New York an emotionally-scarred man when one of his group therapy patients kills herself. Hoping to start anew, he visits an old friend (Scott Bakula) who's a psychiatrist in LA But Capa soon finds his friend dead as well, and all clues point to a Monday Night therapy group, which Capa believes consists of "four neurotics of varying degrees and one killer." While Capa takes on these cases to continue his friend's clinic, he probes them for information leading to the identity of the murderer. The group consists of an obsessive-compulsive lawyer, a nymphomaniac questioning her sexuality, a disturbed older gentle & ? IEst m Instead c t Student R< m NU0_M^ | Columbia 1000 Mon. L mediocre 1\ n his treehouse to protect her from vindictive street t ;hugs and takes her to class as a visual aid for his hu- i nan sexuality class. After all, dad always said to re- < ate what you learn in class to the real world. 1 Ed Harris does an incredible job playing the giddy < :ather who thinks he has finally found the "Grace Kel- ( [y* he has searched for so long. In V, Tom finds a 5 friend who shares his interest in seizing the excite- ,t ment of nature's simple pleasures. Complications arise, as they usually do, and Milk ] Money certainly has its share of formulaic elements, j The tender friendship between V and her newfound 'family" and the wide-eyed innocence of the young boys fuels the film as a character study, but the film still resorts to car chases and sideline action in an un necessary attempt to pick up the pace, brilliant actor Malcolm McDowell (A Clockwork Orange) is wasted, . reduced to a caricature as a high-profile crime lord who wants payback. Melanie Griffith will never be a great actress. Despite a breakthrough performance as a woman who's not all she seems in Something Wild and her Oscarnominated turn as the secretary who beats the system in Working Girl, she will always have a grating high-pitched voice and a glimmer of uncertainty about her. Audiences may have witnessed her recent blunders as a spy in Shining Through, a cop in A Stranger Among Us, and any number of missteps in an unmemorable string of Don Johnson duds. And yet in Milk Money she displays a vulnerability and a nurn lackluster 'C man, a gender ambiguous young man, and a highly disturbed artist who's obsessed with one of his models. This convention of the bizarre provides some humor in a film desperate to make a connection with its audience. Meanwhile, as Capa nears an answer to the murder mystery, he meets and falls in love with a woman named Rose, played by March. Their sequences of underwater lovemaking and music video nvnnnlU/^ ?nmanfi/> aninnato ara miita a latHnurn tn pi 1 VlUOiiVlV OUl|/|/VVU MX V VV M IWVkVffAA vv anyone expecting a hint of real passion. March is certainly beautiful, but she is far from a leading lady. Images of her wearing only an apron, displaying a prominent tattoo, and epjoying a total body rubdown by a toy battle tank linger on after the film is over, but memories of her acting are scarce indeed. Willis acts his part with such subtlety that one is hard pressed to sympathize with his plight or remotely care about his pained life. It is certainly not a showy role, unless you count the constant display of his muscles. Spouting out lines such as "I cannot feel the pain I'm supposed to be feeling now" and "If s just a game; a dumb, deceitful game," his melancholy threatens to derail the movie even before the bad script does. His acting job almost looks good in comparison to ON *. BESS ?f worrying about pack ng for college, Rent it iron Rents < Is Furnitur OME AND OFFICE )esks Coffee Tables Larr efrigerators Beds And M 5FFT1/2OF H RENT DELIVERY to receive offe^J^^/iust onng in coupon to receive ^Eijj Preferred Customer: K| Kererrea cy: Manager: ^jjj Date: M Must show I.D. One discount per contract, p Fontaine Rd. 735-03 -Fri. 9-7, Sal. 9-5 lilk Money*) uring spirit that demonstrates she is maturing as an ictress. Granted, her prostitute character is a work >f pure fiction; but unlike Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman, the character of V is definitely a product of Uj ;he streets. Her love for humanity whimpers and lat- Bj jr screams to emerge to the surface, and the romance ihe finds with the ideal of the American family serves ^ is her bridge to a better life. to She teaches Frank confidence in himself and brings ^ei romance back into Tom's life. Griffith, with her frizzy hu hair and slinky frame, and Harris, with a balding head sh and rugged face, make for a surprisingly down-to- a \ aarth couple. ha Director Benjamin, who often resorts to inane j0i physical comedy about preposterous situations (a to house falling apart in The Money Pit and the sperm B1 bank mix-up of Made in America), still can't get over his juvenile humor at times, but he has definitely so crafted a sweet relationship between Griffith and Har- ne ris as well as Griffith and the boy Carter. fil Milk Money is a funny glimpse into confused Ws it notions of family and friendship. Who would have Ki guessed that a boy and his father who live off frozen in dinners could be shaped up by a visiting prostitute? Well, if s definitely not reality, but it sure makes for na a cute and sometimes touching film. be "If s not what you do; if s who you are," Tom tells Jy his son. Sometimes you can grow up and still see the in goodness in everyone. olor of Night' I ^ si others. Almost every member of the therapy group cr mrapooto +/i nrannslarnns lonortllQ Srrf*nmin(T And ... w,w "u f1 VV*M *V"B o *Y clenching their teeth, they are completely unbeliev- Sl able fictional creations who are too easily generalized w The underwhelming direction by Richard Rush (The Stunt Man) and the writing by Matthew Chap- | man and Billy Ray add to the film's weaknesses. The | screenplay includes lines such as Tor a shrink, you're pretty dense" and "Stop trying to tear off the scabs? let the demons rest." Worse still is a musical score completely mismatched to the sequences it accompanies. Like a badly battered musicbox, the score cranks out terrible music until you almost can't take it anymore. At one point, Willis and March sing to each other before bed, convincing me thoroughly that they shouldn't just quit their day jobs. Color of Night is a ludicrous, schlocky piece of pulp trash with few redeeming features. The generic car chases, the misconceived lesbian love sequence, and a showdown with a nail gun top the list of scenes that make you wonder why the movie was made in the first place. Only a few twists and turns and an occasional dose of wit reassured me that the filmmakers were | not completely colorblind when they green-lighted its creation. ~11?~ : Information S . I to be Offen IX I 1995 Scholai I U I Fellowships am ftI I The Office of Summer I Scholarships will be off< 1 tion Sessions on prestigi f ties for advanced acade :ing leam more about criteri I tion process for the foil ^ I ships, plan to attend an In sion. Faculty and staff mi 4/ I present to explain the r I quirements of individual | All Information Sessior tZ- f at 4 p.m. in the Gress< I the third floor in Harp I the Horseshoe. i ns I , , ? ? ? , . Marshall Scholi ore! Thursday, September 1 1 A highly competitive sc u I Marshall provides two ye Fi I a university in Great Brit | ing students. Candidati maintained a GPA of 3.7 - sess a record of service a | be well informed on glol be no older than 25 years offer^ I I 1994. Allowances includi I cost of living expenses, be to and from the US. Wi TIQn I Fulbright Gran Tuesday. September 13 I Grants are available to ? niors who propose a cle; study to be carried out i academic setting abroad. must be essential to the re proposed. Fluency in the lease. ~ , , , is preferred and a strong 1 American culture and hos rent events are critical Mayans sho< n superhert BHTS, CAMERA, REACTION tei > Stephen Brown Damon Wavans has made a lousy ^ * - AU insition to the big screen. He seemed be a budding superstar during his ^ lure on television's In Living Color, SP t the film career following his series la nt has brought him full circle to form gi )ig fat zero. After Mo' Money, he could ive hung it up, but instead he dons re lg underwear and a patchwork cape th fight crime in the superhero spoof ej lankman. jg Soaring incredibly low on the laugh ale, Blankman is a pointless romp of iar brain-numbing proportions. It is a m with so little comedy to offer that just sits there like a bad chunk of ^ Tptonite, with no effect on moviego- I1 g mortals. si It is the story about a geeky kid w imed Darrvl fWavans) who dreams of 01 sing a crime-fighting hero, constant- t\ sporting a cape and slowly distanc- w g himself from reality. 0j One day, as crime in the city is saching a reckless fever pitch, he ^ langes into his costume in a Port-o- ^ >hn, solicits the help of his brother )avid Alan Grier) as his unwilling 111 dekick, and emerges as Blankman, a P' ime-fighting one-man neighborhood 4 atch program and completely witless 11 iperhero. So begins his quest, in oi hich each j oke progressively falls flat- fi ""(Barii , . Grants are calcul >eSS10nS of travel to and f ?d OI1 living. Also incl lowances and ti 'Snips, applicable. d Grants Programs and sring Informa- Mellon FCi ous opportuni- Humanisti mic study. To ^ , , .. Thursday, Sept a and aDDlicaT\, The Mellon is owing reiiow- , . ,. ? f . 0 scholarship for i formation Ses- _ 4 , .?, to a career of tea embers will be . j in a traditional nents and re- , . , (not including c programs. . . . arts, social scie ?i * . ,j fields such as la is will be held . , , x ? ? social work). S 2tte Room on ~ ? must present not er College on , . , high GRE score, of both teaching . pucny iu cumuli arship well. Awards in medical coverage :holarship, the jars of study at aintograduat- Xruman S( es must have or better, pos- Attention ? nd leadership, Monday, Septer bal issues and Juniors are encoti as of October very competitr e tuition, fees, Truman is awarde )oks and travel outstanding leade pursue careers in service, and wis school to prepare I lowances incli $30,000 for up te , . undergraduate sti graduating se- f , c years), plus 2 01 ar program of J , 1 . . study. n o nirt ir?n I J ii u pui uvuiai The location search project host language For ]Vlore ] background in The Office of Si >t country cur- Scholarships is 1< for selection, lege Rooms 303/ its blanks > spoof r on its face. Blankman must confront the orgazed crime scene of his metropolis as ey threaten to take control of the city, lis modern update of the superhero oof has nothing new to offer except a ndscape of crack houses and mugngs. The only commentary which is even motely in tune with society is that iere is a need for a positive role modin the inner city. But even that point thwarted by this dorky, whining, anjying hero with a flowered cape, red ijamas, and wristband face mask. I'm tired of low budget comedies lat insult the audience's intelligence. ?uess we've reached that time of the immer when studios had to decide hether or not to unload their garbage save it for later. With Airheads, In le Army Now, and Blankman, Hollyood is definitely scraping the bottom 'the cinematic barrel. Wayans has nobody to blame but iwoftlf amoA Vi*v WT*ifo onH nrft LJLLLO^U 11C liei^vu TTiivv wiivt |/t v ace this mess as well. He would be iuch better acting his age and apsaring in a more adult realm of comey. Instead, he is the centerpiece of a lovie which is able to move audiences it the exit door in a single bound while ghting, screaming to get laughs. ifrnrb iated based on the costs rom the US and cost of uded are settling-in aluition waivers, where [lowship in ic Studies ember 15 a highly competitive graduate work leading Lching and scholarship humanistic discipline reative or performing nces, or professional w, library science and uccessful candidates only a high GPA and a but also a philosophy and learning and a ca micate extraordinarily elude travel, tuition, and a monthly stipend. :holarship ? Juniors!!! nber 19 iraged to apply for this ve scholarship. The ;d to students who have xship potential, plan to government or public ;h to attend graduate ; for their careers. Al ide a maximum of ) 4 years: 1-2 years of Lidy (junior and senior r 3 years of graduate Information jmmer Programs and seated in Harper Col304, 777-0958.