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Friday, April 1,1994 ??i Sen J.T. Wagenheim, Editor in Edl Wendy Hudson, Car Nancy Salt Predictions Gators to upset Ark Rockies to win first With one of the year's gre; to mention it being nearl everyone by jilting USQ, to let our readers know exactly w The Final Four Of course, with our infinite wis ing all odds and defeating the Art 96-52 score. President Clinton will be caught at the top of his non-inhaling lun pig hats. But it will be to no avail, The Gators' 300-pound center Player award but will devour it at At a hotel bar, the president ol might fire head coach Mike Kryzew Billy Tubbs. Kryzewski will leave t oascoau s upernng uay The mijor league baseball seas< actly what will happen this seasor The Chicago White Sox, Atlanta ] ies, Chicago Cubs and California sions. The Rockies will defeat the Ai watched World Series in history. We believe that following a midkees owner George Steinbrenner i goes on to lead the league in savi We foresee Michael Jordan playi for the Hickory (N.C.) Crawdads. Jordan will play marginally bu 'What's a crawdad?," infuriating t< dan from the squad. The Carolina Cup We all believe that the No. 3 he year, and we know that about 13 p bling a horse. The most overheard saying in < "Hey, this is just like Tallyho .. 1 We think the second most over I'll buy a Buck-a-Cup pin, Ociffer We, the editorial staff of The Gar > through this entire editorial and ac ion, then we would like the 25 cei Happy April Fool's Day from Th Tflhlp Hiinr strange wo It's amazing to me what som people will claim is work. Apparently there's a ports authoi ity worker somewhere along th( southern coast of the United States (I was too busy looking for the bes price for Cadbury cream eggs in th< newspaper ads to notice the town'; name.) who charged more that $12,000 worth of table dances a: work expenses. For those of vou unfamiliar wit! the wonderful world of exotic danc ing, a table dance is where a gu] who has little or no social life goe; to a club, pays some cash and ; scantily clad female gets even mor< scantily clad right in front of the guy There's lots of gyratin' and pulsatin' apparently. I don't make it a habit tc visit topless clubs; contrary to pop ular belief, the beard doesn't wort when bouncers ask for your ID, especially when your driver's license picture was taken when you were 15 i years old. Now, according to the club owner, $12,000 of table dances at this particular establishment translates to roughly 720 dances. That's quite a bit of booty-shaldn' for one guy. In fact, the Club was nrvn 17 hnnrc that night, and that means about 60 dances per hour. I figure he was entertaining everyone in the club, including the bartender and the table dancers who were taking a water break. I can't quite buy the work expense excuse, though. I guess he probably wrote $1,000 for laptops on his expense account, hoping it would make the computing guys smile and say, "Ah, our fine executive is doing some work on the road." That still leaves a lot of unaccounted-for cash. Maybe these table dancers were business students working for their tuition, and this intuitive young professional was asking their opinions on stock trends and other businesstype stuff. IBaifcock s Student Media Russell House-USO J.T. Wagenheim Nancy Salomonsk Editor in Chief Carolina! Editor Lee Clontz Tony Santori Viewpoints Editor Sports Editor Carson Henderson Davld ^andre11 Copy Desk Chief 1,1010 BAUx Gordon Mantler Chris Muldrow Copy Desk Chief Graphics Editor Wendy Hudson Nora Doyle News Editor Asst- News The Gamecock is the student newspaper of the University of South Carolina and is published Monday, Wednesday and Friday during the fall and spring semesters, with the exception of university holidays and exam periods. Opinions expressed in The Gamecock are those of the editors or author and not those of the University ol South Carolina. The Board of Student Publications and Communications is the publisher of The Gamecock. The Department of Student Media is its parent organization. iif&ock mg USC Since 1908 Chief Lee Clontz, Viewpoints Editor terlal Beard son Henderson, Gordon Mantler, amonsky, Tony Santori ansas, Clinton; World Series itest sports weekends starting today (not [y one vear since Bohhv Cremins shocked the editorial staff of The Gamecock wants hat they can expect. dom, we foresee the Florida Gators defycansas Razorbacks in an all-SEC final by a on national television yelling "Pig, sooey" gs while wearing one of those ridiculous as his homestate team loses. , Dametri Hill, will win the Outstanding the post-game press conference. : Duke University is overheard saying he ski and replace him with Oklahoma coach he Final Four upset. >n opens Sunday and our staff knows ex1. Braves, Baltimore Orioles, Colorado RockAngels will all win their respective divilgels in the seventh game of the mostseason viewing of "Major League II," Yansigns Charlie Sheen to a contract. Sheen es despite the Yankees last-place finish, rig most of the year in the minor leagues t will continually be overheard asking, ;am owner April F. Day, who will cut Jor >rse will win all the races at the Cup this eople will actually see something resemCamden Saturday will undoubtedly be: nit better!" heard saying will be a tie. Either: "Sure, or "Give me the keys; I'll drive." necock, think that if any of you have read tually believed that this is a serious opinlts you owe us for this paper, e Gamecock. ing, liquor >rk expenses i e s ! J Chris Muldrow v GRAPHICS EDITOR f Table dancer: "I'd say to drop s your IBM and pick uo some hoe l jowls. They're gonna go through the > roof!" Executive: "Wowza Wowza Wowza!!! Gurgle gurgle gurgle. ; Burppp!" Table dancer: "Is that a mutual . fund?" " I have to wonder how those table dancers kept going for 720 dances, too. It seems the same old erotic gyrations would lose their appeal after dance 456 or so, and they'd start looking for creative ways to dance. Of course, the executive also charged over 15,000 worth of alcohol to his bill that night, so the last 200 dances were probably pretty hazy anyway. My theory is that the executive, after downing about $2,000 of that liauor. started doine table dances himself. In his drunken stupor, he asked the manager of the club for a job and was immediately hired as the club's first male exotic dancer. He then began to dance for himself, charging himself every time. I figure he woke up in the hotel room the next morning with a couple of 10-spots stuck in the waistband of his BVDs and "Stud muffin" written in lipstick on his calf. That must have also been when he realized he had a lot of explaining to do. Chris Muldrow's column appears every Friday. ws: 777-7726 Chris Carr?n vertising: 777-4249 Carets*** Medi, Y- 777 Laura Day L^v. in- OHOZ Production Manager Columbia, SC 29208 J'"1 Green Asst. Production Manager y Keith Boudreaux Gregory Perez Asst. News Production Asst. Brian Garland Brian McGuire Asst. Carolina! Graduate Asst. Emily Peterson Renee Gibson Asst. Photo Advertising Manager Jimmy Debutts J. Taylor Rutland Asst. Sports Asst. Advertising Manager | raui jon Boscacci I Erik Collins I Cartoonist I Faculty Adviser Lattars Policy The Gamecock will try to print all letters received. Letters should be 200-2S0 words and must include full name, professional title or year and major if a student. Letters must be personally delivered by the author to The Gamecock newsroom in Russell House room 321. The Gamecock reserves the right to edit all letters for ' style, possible libel or space limitations. Names will not be withheld under any circumstances. %hi 6amecock Viewpoi CAA/ As A SlopENl^ , NAMB 0N? of 1/ - fHE Coua/TUSS API 'ANTaGES of HMtN\ ftfE MAi?/?IOT Foot? j SERVICE AT ^ol?^ f UMlVERSlTH? ? The following are the available facts. Beaty granted Sally permission to work outsidi his plantation. He required Sally to pay him a per centage of what she made, and that everythinj above that percentage Sally could keep to buy he; freedom or the freedom of another slave. Sail; saved her money and took Beaty up on his offer She decided to buy an unnamed slave's freedon and approached Beaty to make her claim. At first Beaty allowed the deal, but he then retracted hi! offer. In May 1792, a suit was brought by Sally'! guardian. Beaty argued to the court that he had a vestec right in his slaves and that, while "English Commor Law did not countenance slavery," French Civil Law developed a code which prohibited slaves from suing their owners. Beaty's attorney then argued, "II was the French Civil Law, not the English Commor Law, which governed on this issue." The plaintiff's attorney "confessed that the common law would not apply to this case, but the rules of equity and justice, which were a part of the civil and of the common law, would." The case editor noted that "what made the case unique was that there was no case similar to it in the history of judicial proceedings." Therefore, the court decided "to resort to principles and square this decision by Columnist's attitude frontpage he writes 1 counterproductive norc the rassment. To the editor: It isn't tl At times, I feel I'm the only hetero- rather, it's I sexual male on campus who possess- he makes es any shred of respect for the female leave a wl population. There are times when I which, alth wonder why I feel this way and why directly, c there is such a lack of communication ments as ' between the two genders, but re- claims to p cently I have discovered the embodi- The abui ment of why our problems exist: Jeff molestatio Turbitt. are real. It Every piece he has written for The nose, and ? 1 1 r . 1 1 ? vjamciuLit. rccKs oi mc same maie remaps tr chauvinistic, anti-feminist, close-our- should "de eyes-to-every-problem-that-is-our-fault attitude. Not that Mr. Turbitt thinks women are a worthwhile object of his valuable time, but with his apparent disposition, the task seems impossi- Viftlpflf ble. Women could teach you a thing # or two, Jeff, if you would close your With Rc mouth and open your mind long enough to hear them. To the edi Mr. Turbitt is either unaware of the After the dangers which are printed on the Jan. 25, Dr wno1 "Arkansas just played real! season and the tournam #wp| team with a great coach." jH "Duke. I've always had < Florida would be my seco ints * V MEAtA - L ANIMALS IK Cm PL ^ ?1 I! nritK i nrocn - mui a ^iv^jiucni JU tUlilllllUCU IU 51U< :ivist cabinet. We have a lot of opport projects and to bring new students ir ory tells of justi< s I Stephen King COLUMNIST * such rules as would not injure the rights of the mi 3 ter, nor offer violence to the most benevolent 5 r fections of the slave." The plaintiffs attorney argued that because Bea received the amount of money he requested froi 1 the slave, "there was an implied condition, that u] on such payment, he would be perfectly satisfk and that all she could make over she might dispo: of as she pleased." I Chief Justice Rutledge spoke for the court: .. Although the case was a new one, yet th r court found no difficulty whatever in forming a opinion of it; for the master got the labour of h wench, or what he agreed to receive for her montl , ly wages, (which is the same thing), he could nc be injured; on the contrary, he was fully satisfier and all that she earned over ought to be at her ow ; disposal; and if the wench chose to appropriate th savings of her extra labour to the purchase of thi girl, in order afterwards to set her free, would a ji ry of the country say no?! He trusted they woul not They were too humane and upright, he hopet to do such manifest violence to so singular and a traordinary an act of benevolence. The jury re of the very paper for which 1 superintendent, bem or he simply decides to ie- dents have not hepn : :ality of rape and sexual ha- human life." Hold that minute. le points which he makes; Two days later at a S the degrading way in which Association news conf them. His connotations licitors stated that S< tirlwind of implications ranked seventh in the iough they can't be quoted crime, and that nearly an be seen in such com- all violent crimes in t 'deal with it" and "vague "committed by those ui ersonal trauma." 21." Furthermore, "a di >e is real, Mr. Turbitt. Rape, is that there was a 98 p n, threats and harassment in the number of violer 's happening under your for that age group (ur it's not the victim's fault, from 1988 through 19! lis is something that you Now, do a little arid: al with." ure out when 21 years only coincidence that ir John Buelk Supreme Court legali; Physics sophomore nation of human life in American mothers, an* :e coincides 1994<wes<:<:thc pf up where one-third c >C V. Wade ruling were slaughtered in tl taken the same positic tor: outside the womb tha tragic Eau Claire shooting has taken toward lil . John Stevenson, District womb? I don't think so will win the NCAA Tourm y well throughout the '? ent. They're a great Nicole Priestly ^ cation graduate student :onfidence in them. jfl|E9^V 1 ^ leater graduate student isMARJ Ilk #Foop : CAT " "I am thrilled to be working1 to hard work in an act about our Little-known st< The Guardian of Sally v. Beaty (1792) represent an interesting human interest story of an unusua character where a slave sued her master in a coun where five of the six judges were slave-holders 3_ \ -ESS SW A Dr\i ?A/r> yr ?0S. V J o ~y? i k V\ <5 ' -ll ^ mi - dent advocacy, and I look forward unities to get the word out lto the system." Stephen Brown On being confirmed as SG director of public relations ce in slave South turned a verdict for Sally, and she was set at liberty." Sally v. Beaty did not change the S.C. courts' enforcement of the state's slave laws. There would be other cases where slaves fined well, but for the next 73 years following the Sally decision, slavery conis tinued. if* One wonders what happened to Sally the emancipator and the slave, but the record stands silent ty on the issue. We know nothing about her guardian m either. What is clear is that Sally won a case before P" the state's full court bench in an era when one might suspect she should have lost. It is frustrating that we do not know what happened to Sally or the other slave. We do not know who Sally's guardian was. We do not know why the n judges decided the way they did in the case beyond . the court-stated position. 1 Finding and reporting this decision does not )t change what happened. Neither did the decision j change how slaves were generally treated in the n South. e What we do know is that on a given day in May is 1792, S.C.'s law judges handed down an opinion i- where the court supported a black slave over her d white owner. It changes our perspective slightly. i, We see history as a little grayer, rather than strictc ly black and white, and doesn't that make all the difference? oaned that stu- A Los Angeles gang defended their able to "value members by saying, "Street killings are : thought for a just delayed abortions. Hey, you (adults) waste 'em in the womb ... >.C. Solicitor's we waste 'em in the streets! What's erence, the so- the difference?" Naysayers cannot )uth Carolina write off these street hoodlums as U.S. in violent right-wing Christian zealots, so how 40 percent of jo you answer them? What is the difhe state were ference between killing human beings ider the age of outside the womb, as opposed to isturbing trend ming them msife the womb? ercent increase j the $ q Solicitors Associait enme arrests rii T?_ u, lder 21 years) uull-'<ul- * 'iUX)Ul mis connection De^2 ? tween the violence sown in the womb imetic and fig- ^or 21 years ^ the violence coming ago was. Is it oul those of this generation who i 1973 the U.S. survived the in-utero violence of postzed the termi- Roe America. We will all suffer the the wombs of consequences which we are reaping d that now, in ^ the bad fruit of what we've sown ition that grew and continue to sow, at the rate of >f their peers over 11,000 in-utero murders a year le womb, has in S.C. alone. God help us to wake up >n toward life before this country perishes, t this country e inside the Steve Lefemine 1 Columbia resident ? . iment? )rida should win. They're the underdog." Craig Smith Criminal justice senior tope Florida will win, but I think Duke will, y've got experience in the tournament, and r've got a lot of potential." Cathlyn Ritchie Nursing junior