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Wednesday, February 9, 1994 Mike tal at mino Why? I just don't under- J ^ stand it. I think Michael Jordan might not even know why he's doing it. For some reason, the best player ever to lace up B5 a pair of sneakers rp now wants to put on 1011] baseball cleats and -* try to live out a child- Spc hood fantasy...in front of the watchful eyes of the whc sporting world. When Jordan retired from tl NBA in the fall, he said he want< k to escape the public eye, relax ai play golf. Playing a 162-game se son (or more in the White S( case) during the span of sev< months hardly sounds like " A, R " So, now that Chicago has sign* MJ to a minor-league contract, I will report to spring training aloi with about every reporter on tl planet and thousands of fans wl will flock to Florida to catch glimpse of their hero. Jordan said he isn't and nevi has been afraid to fail. Let's ho{ he means what he says. Of course, if by some mirac Jordan ends up actually bein (gasp!) good, the U.S. governmei had better start running some tes on him to see what planet he' really from. Harding a disgrace. I hope the U.S. Olympi Committee does the proper thin and decides to keep Tonya Hardin from going to Lillehammei Norway, for the figure skatin competition. Harding represenl everything people from around th * world think of as the "ugl American." The USOC should sus Submit Anytime. You Know M)U \Xtmf Tft PORTFOllO MAGAZINE \ I I V kes swine o rleagues pend her from comMm petition, if for no other reason than for the way she wears her hair in that pony tail. Fogler's Fortitude. Gamecock basketn , ball coach Eddie f Oanion Fogler should be Hbb? commended for some irts Editor of the things he HASN'T done this >le season, like slit his wrists or hang himself. The things his team have tie done to him this year would proband bly be considered crimes in other id countries. USC has blown seconda half leads numerous times and also >x has come back from deficits only jn to fall short in the end. The fact R that Fogler doesn't at least have an ulcer (to my knowledge he doesn't) 2d says something about him. le ig Prediction Corner. le One more time, and if I get 10 THIS one wrong, I will quit giving a picks forever. Clemson 73, USC 65. er )e Will Buddy be a good buddy? Phoenix Cardinals owner Bill TP le Bidwell fired coach Joe Bugel g against the wishes of most Phoenix it players and fans. So, the logical ts thing for Bidwell to do would have s been to hire a soft-spoken, low-key the coach who is well liked by every- Fon body. Instead, Bidwell hires the mar most volatile coach this side of cou c Mike Ditka. Buddy Ryan. Whether of": g the Cardinals will accept Ryan sep; g with open arms remains to be seen. B r, The Cardinals are, of course, the a he g team that usually wastes its No. 1 equ :s pick on a player no one has ever sue! e heard of. I sometimes wonder if wor y some of their picks really exist. navi i_ " this LITERACY, AT RISK I ? ? KIDS, HUNGER... ' YOU CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE. m" Call or come by the Office of Community Service Programs 777-5780. I Has Y( 1 Patieri f Expire Problem: You weren't just la lost 20 minutes on your exar a parking space, of course.. You need to mi life easie Solution: Move to Whe Right on the edge of campus offers off-campus living wi convenience. While some m more to live close to campus offers low student rates and s upperclasspersons as well a; So save time, save yourself i leases and most of all sav( parking mone) Now Pre-L< for Summe Fall '0. Monday - Friday p 9:30am - 5:30pm <j^ 254-7801 211 Main St. Whet %\\z 6am cci Taking her best si HHinv mm H *fnB Vlalinda McDaniel goes up for two points a :eers, 91-75. Shannon Johnson led the Gar ree food, tig d like to dedicate this column to watcl men and women of the Armed cock1 :es. It takes a special breed of hu- those i to step in front of a bullet for this work ntry, although it's the same type huggii special" that gets you placed in a 1 ane' irate school as a youth. Pa<^s : YY/lv ut, I digress. My topic for today is wn >t one in collegiate sports: gender ' ^'r ity. I can't figure out why there is sPorts i a large gap between men's and 1 m r is cro nen's sports. Doctors in Scandi- j a ^ a have figured out a way to close gap, I understand, but their methare a little bit drastic. gen itod (or Eddie Fogler, as he is fillip id by some in these parts) forgive | but women's athletics are simply oft e fun to watch than men's. crotcl . r __ i? -i > prooi, men, wouia you ratner ? C\ -a A our ice ;d? te for class - You n! ... looking for . and now this. ike your r! iley's Mill. Whaley's Mill th on-campus iay think it costs Whaley's Mill ipecial leases to > grad students. ;; !| :rom expensive 5 that wasted /\ easing ir ana 4 Mt-r\ i e home isn't far away ick lOt Br A ^Krx% i^B WM^M <^0** .^ HHf^V w WW JMfc. a Jl &,' ?n^w FT ?n, ^BWT A ^^El4 1 h -* k ^Bhb I \ ^ ki' I _ Ml iiil in - igaiiist Pashen Thompson Tuesday in Frank McGuire Arena. T necocks with 32 points. ht shorts make wc i the Lady Game- then the ai volleyball team in would be hi too-short-for-net- Another r< television, butt- fer women's ng shorts, or Steve the stuff givi yhill in shoulder > an effort to i and a helmet? L sometimes y, you may ask, do tendance | ik that women's ft D1 A' sense, by t i are more exciting Mcitt riOUlIlCC crotch grab nen's? The answer ?? Athletics D< tch grabbing (or Senior Writer gives away a thereof). The L ly neat th ; viewing public is roommat "\f cppino I pnnv Htrlvctm nnK Kic lyjiwutt 1110 lUVJll I ?\onpapciv,u Willi pu lis with his left hand while re- Lady Gamecock basketba ? his wad of chewing tobacco leyball teams, lis right appendage. Some sports writers esf :ourse, maybe if there was more joy women 's events. Bei 1 grabbing in women's sports, credibly underpayed tale are, we look for free food Ifys 5^; I H U i - . r;. " ' .. ? / ' ' & w I For Columbia's Bes Pull Into "The VISTA CB CTATI IllIAJ \J ^ One St< W Entertainment 931 Senal 779-38 COLLEGE Thursday, Fet FREE Admission in Wednesdc Chairman of tl Thursday-Sat Thunder Road & I Happy Hour 4:3< j|| FREE Buffet * FRiE Admissii fe.;&<<>? .1 "^f <**'' *>X-:-XXS> .vr>XX:*: >' XIXxX <y*:2$ - JX i-:*:;-: *: *: > XXK?iv?::'^ XX<*iv 1XX-XXX * \>> X:: XyXXXXX:?" B . ' : : ''^^^^^ \ K V/.. /. :* vl^^H M il :':v'v?; Complex ^ te St. 75 MIGHT '. ' : ' '<: : '' '" iruary 10 r/ College ID ay lie Boa id urday ; Identity Club on Drink Specials 9 David Mandrell/The Gamecock 'he Lady Gamecocks lost to the No. 2 Lady Volun>men's sports ttendance we can find it. And because fewer gher. people take advantage of the VIP buf;ason I pre- fet at women's games, there are more athletics is chicken wings for the aspiring scribe. 2n away. In Gamecock basketball fans have a ncreasethe good reason for preferring the dismal at- women's team. The ladies win every ^caused, 1 once in a while. The last time the USC he lack of men's team was better than the ?bing), the women's squad, the men cut down epartment peach baskets at the end of the year, lot of real- Also, there is a measure of suspense ings. My at Lady Gamecock games. Christy e has his Timmons, Nicki Bass and company sters of the might miss a three-pointer. Emmett ill and vol- Hall, Jamie Watson and company do miss their three-pointers. )ecially en- 1 do realize that my views may be ing the in- controversial, but 1 really don't care, nt that we So please excuse me while I scratch I wherever an itch. t Night Life... sfTRAL