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Viewpoint < 2 Tuesday, August 12, 1986 Too fast USC's sumi school endi "Summer loving, had me a blast, Summer loving, happened so fast.... " The lyrics from "Grease" say it well: Summer's over, and it went quick. It's back to the grind of September school days for continuing students. For graduating students, the party really is over ? for them, it's on to the Real World. See Andy's thoughts on this subject, elsewhere on this page. If you don't have a tan to impress your roommate on your first day back in the dorm, you have only two weeks to get one. If you need to earn $200 more from your summer job to pay for your increased tuition, you have a bit of a problem and the sincere sympathy of every other working student. Good luck to all students on their final summer exams. Summer school students haven't even had a regular vacation, just three weeks in the spring and less than two before fall semester. Unfortunately the Real INor When I was in collegc I often heard legends about life in the Real World, but I never believed them. Even the oldest maps in the mustiest recesses of the school libraries showed only a great blank area where the Real World was reputed to be, along with cryptic notations such as "Here There Be Dragons." As 1 had not the faintest idea where the Real World lay, my chances of going there after graduation seemed remote. But just as Aunt Malinda once left thr nirnnrl hminrl fnr hntnr? mirl would end up in Red Bank, I somehow took a wrong turn on the road to fame and fortune and found myself in the uncharted reaches of the Real World. I knew 1 had arrived when I awoke my first morning in my new apartment to find Rod Serling standing at my bedside. "Presented for your consideration: one Andy Duncan," he said. "A 6-foot stretch of the American Dream who shook the dean's hand, pocketed his diploma and walked straight off the stage into the sunset ? and into the uncharted reaches of the Real World." "Thanks for nothin', Rod," I said, hut he already had been replaced by a commercial break, so he wasn't around to see my first attempt at cooking. Here are some of my favorite Real World breakfast recipes. Scrambled egg: lake one (1) egg. Twist open and empty contents into greased frying pan. Pick out shells with one or two fingers, as required. Add 1 (one) tablespoon milk. Put pan on burner set on high. Scramble with spatula until eyes water from smoke, lor more than one egg: Use more than one egg. Cold cereal: Open one (2) small box dry cereal, emptying contents into bowl. Add cold milk as desired. Eat with spoon until finichfvl Put cmnlu hrtvul r?n tor* of 14 oilier empty cereal bowls in sink. Turn radio to nearest album rock station to mask sound of stomach growling. Coffee, French toast, hash browns, biscuits and gravy, blueberry muffins, bacon and sausage: Get into car and drive to nearest Shoney's. Recite these words to orange-haired waitress named Darla. Food will appear within five minutes. Eat, pausing only for guttural sounds of appreciation. Clean plate so thoroughly that it requires no further washing after you leave. After my Real World breakfast, I go to the office. My official work schedule of 9 a.m. to 6 p.m., Eastern Standard lime, becomes 9 a.m. to 8 p.m. mer of work, ? too quickly Many of these students held jobs and went to school at the same time. That's not an easy thing to do during a regular fall or spring semester, and when you consider the student who pulls it off while also squeezing three months of course information into five weeks of summer classes, the accomplishment merits special commendation. /\nu wniie everybody at USC has been working hard this summer, none have labored more so than the students trying to cam those last three hours required for graduation. We congratulate the summer graduates of USC and wish them well in their future efforts. , And for those coming back for the fall, you can look for- i ward to another semester of ioomaii games, Friday night parties and final exams. , Dorms open at 10 a.m. Aug. ( 24 and classes begin four days | later. The Gamecock's j Welcome Back issue will be distributed Aug. 29. See you in s 17 days. < r, he learns, Id is for real r ^v HI j|H^r, ' .dBBBBHBHBBHBBBk A n/iu jr\ii\Ay Duncan when measured in Real World Time. For this, I earn a paycheck thai gets converted into Re^l World currency by the government before I ever see it, losing about 30 pet cent in the translation, but retaining a sum suffi cicnt to keep nie living in the style to whieh I am accustomed ? abject poverty. Another interesting aspect of Real World finances is renter's insurance. That's what most landlords require you to have before they'll let you move in, and to get it you have to talk to a mythical beast called an insurance agent. These creatures live behind desks and say "Now, let's see" a lot. "Now, let's see," said my agent, whom I'll call Swifty. "Do you have any belongings of any value other than the VCR, the complete collection of Howard the Duck comic books and Edwin Newman's autograph?" "What about my college diploma?" I said. "At current tuition levels, it's worth more than $8,000." Swifty snickered, stamped "Abject Poverty" across my insurance form in red and said, "Mr. Duncan, you forget that this is the Real World." Some of you readers are graduating before the month is out, and some of you who can't wait to enter the Real World arc worried about whether there's room for you out here. If that's your ambition, the Real World has plenty of vacancies. But then, so did the Bates Motel. Andy Duncan is a Spring 1986 graduate of I'JSC, and now writes for the News & Record in Greensboro, N.C. wrap** Time to meet th Now that the summer is windinc down and ny tour of duty as editor in chief of The Gamecock is officially over, it's time to look sack at the past three months and reminisce about "How I spent my summer vacation." The newspaper staff had planned to publish an issue each week, which is the usual ^ schedule for the summer edition. But financial situations limited us to just five issues ? k four to be distributed on campus every two j weeks throughout the summer, and one to be ? mailed to incoming freshman as part of their * orientation to the university. As the editorial staff, we received many r questions relating to the publication schedule and size, such as, "How come there are no , Gamecocks?" and "Why is it only six * pages?" But we also had normal inquiries, 1 and somebody even asked us the Journalist's | Favorite Question: "Just who do you think t you arc, anyway?" I Well, now that you know the answers to the first two were a result of finances (or lack ^ thereof), here's your chancc to "met the press," and let you know exactly who we think we are, and what we'll be doing this fall now that summer has come to an end. A rising sophomore, Amy DelPo is a real whiz kid in the newsroom and has one of the brightest futures this paper has seen in a long time. After reading the first two summer issues, my dad asked if there were any other news writers ? as the news editor, Amy had written almost all the stories for both issues. 1 told him that she did all that and more ? most of which was vital to producing the paper, but never seen when it hit the stands the next morning. Without her, I would actually have had to do some work around here. Amy will be working as one of the assistant news editors for 7he Gamecock in the fall ? but if she wants it, it probably won't be long before she'll be typing at the desk of the editor in chief. Jennifer Rust, our Viewpoint editor and all-around cheerleader, will resume her position as a staff reporter. She also plans to devote much of her time in the fall to her sorority. Kappa Kappa Gamma, for which Man nn tho ct ^Hpw^ beneficial "They are moderately "I thir beneficial... professors beneficial, often cut back on the course way to c work - they have to." limited tin Shanden Sinha Graduate student, public administration busn The Gameco ,V '^3^ s|^p ' r imi' '- <-^aifc*^w^M3ttar,ll'*?^*?^ffi^*1 juT-fe inic <ffeGreat Lali e press ? sum ? v~^i The 1986 Summer editorial staff. Front Row: Jen nifer Steib, photo editor; Jennifer Rust, Viewpoint editor. Back row: Paula Wethington, Spotlight editor; Tracy FJlixson, editor in chief; Opus, mascot; Amy DelPo, news editor. she has more love and enthusiasm than Midas had for gold. Jennifer Steil) will continue her duties in the fall as photo editor. Her job at McKissick Museum kept her at work most of the day, so we didn't get to see much of her this summer. But somehow, she found time to carry out her work at the newspaper, too, and always came through with our photo requests. Every production day, there was a package of photographs waiting for each section, as if elves had come in the night and shot, developed and printed each picture. But you can't fool us, Jennifer ? remember, we're journalists. We know who did the work. You're the only one with a key to the darkroom. met are summer schc ik they're very "I think the It's a very good beneficial in - / over maieriai in a necessary toi a le." be able to gradua Catherine Dillener reasonable amoui Graduate student, St ness administration Graduate, Kdiior In C hlef Tracy Mixson New* Kdiior Wi*\ Amy DelPo Spotlight Kdiior Paula Wethington - . IH;^--:' \ >^,?.Mtr.tr.||||(||11L Qll^Il m HgaKn ISpEKJJJjj^ - JU^K BBHgl '" ' Kwfw ? > zi'mm. > it?n ipj? IfliiteiJfc am kB8BM' '' met staff, '86 Editorial Comment By Tracy Mixson Paula Wethincton will continue as editor of the Spotlight section. "I never realized how much I'd like this job," she said midway through the summer. "I mean, you can actually say what you mean when you write features. News writing doesn't allow that freedom." She's done a super job overhauling that section, and she has even bigger and brighter ideas for the fall. O.K., Paula, so now may I j cover the .38 Special Concert in September? As for Yours Truly, I'll be getting a promotion ? at least that's how I see it. I'll edit The Gamecock's football publication, Kickoff Magazine, and as The Gamecock's graphic arts editor I'll also make sure that Bloom County and The Far Side are printed in every edition. Football and comics? There couldn't be a better job. But as good as that sounds, I'm still hesitant to give up this summer position. In addition to the nice office that comcs with the job, I'll miss the comradery, the learning experience, and the fact that we were able to escape the daily 100-degree weather by "slaving" away in our air-conditioned, 65-degree newsroom. As Jennifer Rust recently said, "We're the people who forfeited tans and parties to bring USC its summer edition of The Gamecock." But we did it gladly, and even if some of the news was a week or so old, we tried to present it in an entertaining and informative manner ? and hope you didn't notice the time element. i So what if our four little issues don't win any prizes for journalism superiority. We can honestly say we did our best. And more im: portantly, we had a good time. We hope you did too. is**/ ifnnn 9 ru# jy're very "I think that four weeks is that it's way too short for any class, student to You just commit everything ite within a to short term memory - you .A - / A! Hi#-. ## ii or time, aon i get any review. anley Davis Sherman Woodson psychology Graduate, occupational health Director Viewpoint Kdltor Bill Clements Jennifer Rust Production Photography Kdltor Lewis Covington Jennifer Steib Mark Armstrong AdvWor Advertising Mfcnager Bill Rogers Margaret Michels