The gamecock. (Columbia, S.C.) 1908-2006, May 06, 1981, Page Page 12, Image 12
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This edition of File 13 marks the 24th and
final column of this kind for the remainder
of eternity. We've taken some good-natured
stabs at the parking situation, General
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uihuico, uunudisiruiurs, cuucnes, eating
places on campus, recommended college
courses to take, George Rogers, the local
bookstores and many others and we hope
during the course of the writings that some
people have found their sense of humor (or
lack of it). It is only fitting that the "Final
File" be dedicated to our production staff
the backbone of the newspaper.
Production staffs are notorious for having
the lowest, unintelligent, underpaid,
overworked, worthless, crass bunch of
characters with the scruples of apathetic,
whiskey-guzzling winos. The Gamecock
production statt is a little bit different.
They're worse.
It is inconceivable how eight of the most
despicable characters ever assembled on
God's earth could all unite in one place but it
goes on all the time and the sad part is that it
Writers Ser
from page 11
GECKLE FELT that part autographed
of the problem was that something sr*v
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students don't read in as much a kid
general and have not read buy the books
anything by the writer who is to autograph it
speaking in particular, believe is that
Geckle feels however that college I saw
this should not be a deterrent and William Ft
to attendance because part and I didn'i
of the function of the series is autographs."
to get students interested in For students
new writers. Geckle also attend the t
added that having an writers serie
Graduation is May 1
mSOUTHE^
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Problem pregnancy counseling
Abortion counseling and services v?>
Free pregnancy & birth control service
Trained counselors
Speakers tor school & civic groups
Abortion counseling & services
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happens in the production of our newspaper.
Every Tuesday, Thursday and Sunday
they stagger in, each bumping into a desk
and falling down. Then, with the $56 K-Mart
stereo blasting Slim Whitman, they go about
their business ? of screwing up. It's bad
enough when they try to make up vulgar
headlines and draw mustaches on all the
picture faces we print, but they will
deliberately try to get the paper into
lawsuits by printing fictitious stories about
USC administrators.
THEIK NAMES should not even be listed
but in order to place the blame fully, they
are: Bill, Mark, Fenton, Pat, Wanda, Ann,
Kathv anH If thpv ennnr) nhnnvinnc
that's because they are. It makes the whole
third floor of Russell House shudder when
one of them stumblesintothe den of iniquity
otherwise known as "the production room."
Each one of them is twisted. Bill, suprvncnrJlir
fhn n??r ? ifiAM
puovuijr pi i uv nuii inaiia^ci , spcuua no
spare time printing up pictures of himself in
hopes that one urthem will turn out good.
ies in retros\
book is portunity to meet such
cial. "I'm just writers as Joseph Heller and
as anybody. I Kurt Vonnegut, and jourand
get them nalist Tom Wolfe was
. What I can't missed.
when I was in As for the future, Geckle
Robert Frost mentioned the possibility
winner speak
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; who didn't
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Mark, his unable assistant, stays glued to
his television set 24 hours a day and watches
his portable set, eyes glued to the screen,
when he pastes up advertisements. Fenton,
an ugly step-child of a homosexual draft
dodger, plays rugby in his spare time with
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uic iiuciiaiiy ui d tusiirag. jrai, a iouamouthed
arrogant New York drug-dealer,
has a speech deficiency understood only by
a wild band of singing gypsies who live
under the Brooklyn bridge. Wanda, an
aspiring school-teacher, is learning how to
read the stories she has to set in type. Ann is
pect
that Eudora Welty may H
speak here next spring. He p
also honfs that ITnHilrA will T*l
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be here soon. 'This is a H <
major university," Geckle ]
said, "and we should have a .
major cultural program."
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in a sorority; enough said. Kathy is a woman
with no future except to sit behind
an information desk and give out wrong
numbers. Lee, a strange male Caucasian,
sometimes wears suits and sometimes
doesn't, making him weird.
On 0nnH Have thou ?i/i 11 Hoolmn
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production room and break every machine.
On a bad day, they will attempt to set fire to
the USC campus by placing a match on
scattered unleaded gasoline. Please be on
the lookout for them: they are extremely
dangerous.
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