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' 'W WMnff i Since this is m suicide! I'll be b; desk, presenting that never made collected Works.' before midnight t< Overheard on a "Is it live ... or isi Question: What Answer: A petri A New Book: ' silicone injections Off The Wire: ( ? l f new pian ior put popular performt first," Silverman announced his Shapespearean D ABC, he said, are i Very Punny: C< tention to publish i Your Final Exa be used). 2. A has three s throws one at his f; a. a social diseaj b. a cop followini c. Saturday Nigh d. Yes. New Game for ti Choose the uglies teams and suppli< Donkey is disqualii Blind-man's Blu an aimless path th wins; if there is ; declared champior Trivia Madness correct answers ur 1. What actor pla 2. Who's Chipan< 3. What's the nan 4. Whatorganiza 5. (Very hard) W Saturday Mornir Baby Child Abuse! snap! Feel the pap last long! Ah, Progress: Si ping the old bark plastic bark. Seeir wasn't supposed to, "Jones! You're b oo ii s good nig semester is shot to I Fry. tow Only 39< Ge Come fry oui Then go fly y For only 39' 121 I College (Across from Hors?sho< ^ I y last Left Hand for the semestei ack next year!), I thought I migl all the little bits and pieces of h it into the column. That's right ' For just $5.98, you get all these g anight... oh, excuse me. Memorex Commercial: Reproduc t just a lousy glass?'' do you call a scared flower arrang ified florist. Tit for Tat ? the exciting story ; J AP) ? NBC President Fred Silver ting his network back on top ? ;rs and forcing them to quit. 4,C said. "Now I'm working on Bob 1 npwpct chniu 41? uuvn, uuntu lilt: VTUI rama. Rumors that Silverman i unfounded. entral Correctional Institution ha i literary magazine. Its name? Pre m: 1. Spell your name correctly ( ix packs of beer. He gives onp to ather. B has: >e g him it Fever. he Young: Pin the Tail on the Don t as the Donkey. Other eight are 2S with six-inch darts. Anyone w fied. ff: Child is blindfolded, spun arou irough a live minefield. The persoi a tie, the one with the most vitc 1. : Insane little devil that I am, I v itil next semester. yed Chuck Parker? i Dale's girlfriend? ne of Tom Terrific's dog? tinn HiA WnruolrJr. *?? uiu uui jrarvm WU1 IV IUI ' hat movie did Carl Smith get marr ig Commercial: Kenner announce See the realistic bruises appear! * er-thin skull crumble! Get yours nith and Jones were at work in ti off the trees and replacing it wi lg that his partner was working QmitV* ? 1 ? * * , uiimui uaiivcu dl juiits ana ssici! arking up the wrong tree!" ht, sleep tight and pleasant drean hell. See you next year. ingSauc ideCaim : With Large Order t fern at Burger Kilt r delicious trench fries. 'our "Frying Saucer." ... I I \ASnilO cnnnlirtf 1' 4 0UK the U.S.C. Campus Kll 9 and Drayton Hall) * (no, don't commit < it clean out the old j umorous endeavors 1 ? this is "The Un- s reat hits if you send 5 ;tion so true we ask, i J er? f h of Tat Robertson's P v man announced his ti enraging his most arson was just the ii nope." He has also r ider Chimp does d s still working for h e s announced its in- a >se and Cons ... w scratch paper may si s< B, drinks one and w n si Si ai key: Nine players. pi ! divided into four oi ho fatally wounds ai gi nd, and sent off on b< i to come out alive sp il organs intact is Pi ^on't announce the fa cc su if! iedin? "IV s our newest doll: in\ lear the tiny bones I today! They won't rin le city park, strip- p ith new, efficient, on a tree that he is to all," and the ersl WIS! ^ -VSH3 j-1 f --y>i j * mH OfFHes. I g." 8 I % 1[L ' Miss Win timely By Peter J. Boyer AP TV Writer LOS ANGELES (AP) ? The sitcom being TV's favorite form, and the liberation of women being >ne of everybody's favorite subjects, it figured that one of the ieiworKs would come up with something like Miss Winslow & Jon. CBS' newest sitcom is about an ndependent young woman who got iregnant but didn't love the child's ather enough to marry him. She lad a couple of options open at this oint but chose the only one that zould support a sitcom ? she has tie baby and raises it alone. The problem with Miss Winslow ; that it's an adult sitcom idea endered adolescent by its hanling. We're asked to cheer for and iugh with a heroine who's hnin nough to stand up for herself and ssert her independence. What e're given, though, is a cutesy imperer (Darleen Carr) who sems a little embarrassed about hat she did, and a whole lot of laterial that has been around the tcom block a few times. In a recent episode, for example, iisan Winslow(who works in an mbiguous but suitably with-it rofession) goes on a date with one her clients. She returns home id tells her mother she likes the jy out is afraid to get close to him realise of ... well, you know, her >ecial little problem. Her mother, who would have eferred Susan getting into the mily business through the more inventional route, scolds: "Susan! You put a charming, ccessful bachelor on hold? What he hangs up!" To which Susan responds, lother, I'm just not ready to get 'olved." Vbout this time the doorbell gs, and there stands none other P SEN/0 JUNIC [ORDERYC ! i ico n *e Have it shippea Only $10 Dep weeks r pop nonco j 81 %/ 11/i.n i JOSTE S P.O. B( I Salichi i $ IT"""" See Ring Di USC CJ slow 7 pre TV doesn' than the charming, successful bachelor himself, who insists upon a dinner date. Well, they make a date, and , Susan decides to tell the guy about her baby, despite her mother's warning that men don't make H||^ RS - Last Cha )RS - Last Che " mis sem )UR 1 >S RING f to your summer a osit ? Balance C inginformatTo N'S )x 1414 iry, N.C. 281' a spiay & Ordering / tVMPUS BOOKSTC wes that 't work passes at girls with young lasses (or lads). Turns out, Mom is right. The guy's a jerk. I guess it's admirable when TV tries to be timely, but tries like this make you wish for the days when it didn't. nee! wee ester! nowTI ) ddress OD - 6 to 8 ? 1 IM WRITE { 5 5 5 J lyers in | )RE I