University of South Carolina Libraries
DBny Margu EXCHANC Professor: "You in the back of the room, what was the date of the signing of the Magna Carta?" "I dunno." "Well, then, tell me when the battle of Hastings was fought?" "I dunno." "You don't eh? Well, let's try something else. Who was Bonny Prince Charley?" "I dunno." "You don't! I assigned this stuff lasit Friday. What were you doing last night?" "I was out to a shop with some friends." "You were! What audacity to stand there and tell me a thing like that! How do you expect to pass this course?" "Wal, I don't mister. You see, I just come in to fix the radiator." "Do you think your son will for get all he learned at college?" "I hope so. He can't make a liv ing necking." Myrna: "If you kiss me I'll call a member of my family." Alan: (he kisses her). Myrna (sighing): "Brother!" $ 0 0 "That girl certainly puts on the dog." "In what way." "Her father is an undertaker down in Georgia, and she tells everyone her father is a Southern planter." The little girl had been promoted to the third grade and she met her second grade teacher. "Gee, Miss Sullivan," she piped, "I wish you were &mart enough to teach me this year." 0 0 C After his first dancing lesson, little Willie was asked by his mother how he got along. "Aww it's easy," he explained, "all you got to do is keep turning around and wiping your shoes on the floor." New car features are appealing, But confidentially, What I want most in a new car is ME. Sales Manager: "What's this bigf item on your expense account?" Salesman: "That's my hotel bill." Bales Manager: "Well, don't buy any more hotels." Then there were the three Chinese girls who didn't date: Tu Yunc Tu, Tu Dum Tu, and No Yen Tu. Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall. Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. All the King's horses and all the King's men. Had EGGNOG. * C C A cannibal came up to the chief and said, "We just caught an actor." The chief replied, "Wonderful, I was hoping for a ham sandwich." The young man sneaked up be hind her, covered her eyes with his hands and announced: "I'm going SOX'S B1 Al TWIN DJ 5 PO Private Dii For Small IV Parties U Try Our MEAT and 3 DRINK and erite Webb S IE EDITOR to kiss you if you can't tell me who this is in three guesses." "George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, Abraham Lincoln," she guessed. * * 4 He kissed her in the garden, It was a moonlight night; She was a marble statue, He was a little tight. * * * The aviation instructor, having delivered a lecture on parachute Jumping, concluded:. "And if it doesn't open - well, gentlemen, that's what is known as 'jumping to a conclusion'." 0 0 0 Mistress: "I saw the milkman kiss you this morning, Jane. I'll take the milk in myself after this." Jane: "It won't do you no good, mum. He promised not to kiss anybody but me." Al: "What's eating you?" Jim: "Oh, nothing much. But when your girl friend said she'd dig up a date for me - brother, she wasn't kidding!" * * * Seven Stages of Man: 1. Milk. 2. Milk, vegetables. 3. Milk, ice cream, sodas, candy. 4. Steak, coke, french fries, ham and eggs. 5. Pate de fois gras, frogs' legs, caviar, Poulet Royal, hors d'oeuvres, crepe suzettes, Scotch, wine, champagne. 6. Milk and crackers. 7. Milk. Policeman: "Say, little boy, don't you know you are supposed to cross the street with the signal light?" Little boy: "Yes, mister, but I have been standing on that corner for ten minutes, and the light hasn't moved an inch." Jackie: "Ma, when we have com pany for dinner today have I gotta eat my pie with a fork?" Ma: "Yes, indeed you do." Jackie. "Well, have you got a piece I could practice on before the company comes?" A young doctor who had set up practice in a rural district, and whose business was not flourishing, was sitting in his office reading one afternoon when his hired girl appeared at the door. "Them boys is a-swipin' of the green apples off'n that tree in the back yard, sir. Should I drive 'em away?" The young doctor walked over to the window, considered a m-. ment, and then, leveling his eyes at the servant, replied: "No." If you drink a glass of water every day for 1,200 months you will live to be a hundred. ARBECUE UIVE IN INTS ring Room [eetings and p to Sixty Lunches' VEGETABLES DESSERT This picture was taken at the I week in Drayton Hall by the two 1 Seated from left to right observi J. B. McConaughy, Marjorie Ray, Four Given Gr Appointments. In University I Appointment of thre6 stude and one to a foreign fellowshi Dr. W. H. Callcott, dean of 1 The foreign fellowship weni street, New York. He holds t the University of Wisconsin. to take further graduate wor at the university. Those receiving graduate assist antships are Roy Lee Faulkf, Jr., of 2430 Blossom St., who will re ceive the bachelor of science de gree from the university this month; Mrs. Georgette LeRoux Hernandez, 604 Tyler St., who has had five years of college and pro fessional training in Liege, Bel gium, and now is a graduate stu dent at the university; and Ray S. Stoudemire of Little Mountain, who will receive the bachelor of arts degree at Erskine college this month. Faulk's appointment is in the school of business administration, Mrs. Hernandez's in the depart ment of modern languages, and Stoudemire's in the department of history. Proficiency Test Is Administered To Law Seniors Law School seniors who do not have an academic degree have been required to take an English usage and proficiency examination. The examination was given January 13. Freshmen entering in the spring semester will take the examination February 1 at 3 p. m. in the law school. Those students who took the exam last fall and graded be low 65, will be required to take it again. Other students who have not yet taken it and who do not have aca demic degrees will be required to pass it before graduation. Graduating exercises for law school seniors will be held in the Supreme Court room at the State House January 22 at noon, the law school announced this week. Director of Research Board Speaks to Law Federation Students L.. W. Bishop of Piedmont, S. C., Director of the South Carolina Re search, Planning and Development Board, spoke to the Law Federa tion January 6 In the Chapel, James L. Gibbs, chairman of the program committee, said. Before taking over his present position Bishop was a banker. He was vice-president of the Phila delphia National Bank. Tradia The Key Candy & WHOLES4 Candies - Toba 1231-1237 L Columb z,tb Ciameceek Debater lypatian-Euphrosynean debating tot romen's literary societies on the car ng part of the tournanent are Ire Dr. M. B. Seigler, and Lou Oswald rtduate Study 4s Assistants Oepartments nts to graduate assistantships p was announced this week by he graduate school. to T. C. Lung, 528 W. 123rd he master of arts degree from rhe fellowship will enable him in the department of history German Girl Seeks A American Letters To Aid English The foreign language depart ment has received a letter from Vera Allwardt, a young German girl, who seeks to increase her knowledge of the English language through a correspondence with an American student. The letter reads as follows: "Rostock [Germany], November 11, 1948. Dear sirs, enclosed I send you a letter and beg you to give him to a student who is will ing to correspond with a german girl. Very much obleged to you, yours, Vera Allwardt, Rostock i./M, Wismarschestr. 11."' The enclosure read: "Rostock, November 11, 1948: Dear Sir, I am a german girl of fifteen years, my naame is: Vera Allwardt, .. . "I would like to correspond with an American studend to improve my knowledges of english language. Maybe you wouki like to learn ger man language or to improve your knowledges in the languages, then it would be possible to march [make] our letters nmutnal [mu tual]. "If you agree with my proposi Lion I would be eirjoyed [over joyed], to hear from you so soon as possible, yours, Vera Allwardt." Dean Bradley's letter to The Gamecock accompanying the above letters suggested that the corres pondence "might be of partioaular interest to some German student." CENTRAL -DRUG CO. OPEN 24 HOURS 5197--PHONES-5198 1204 MAIN STREET (ERBY ig As Tobacco Company LE ONLY ccos - Sundries incoln Street irnament, which Was presented last r1pus. ne Krugman, Ruby Kitchens, Dr. New Chaucer Version Given Good Review Dr. Robert Lumiansky's recent English free prose translation of "The Canterbury Tales of Geoffrey Chaucer" received a highly favor able review in the New York Times Book Review January 2. Dr. Lu miansky received his master's de gree from the university July 24, 1928. His translation is the first of Chaucer done in modern idiomatic English. Chad Walsh, reviewer, said, "Mr. Lumiansky has cleared away the linguistic bariers between Chaucer and the modern reader, so that the superb story teller can be enjoyed as casually as today's best soler. This, in itself, is a very great ac coiplishment and the book is made yet more appealing by the trans lator's excellent introduction and iht iseveral dozen illustrations done in color by Mr. Hoffman." (H. Lawrence). The translation was prefaced by Mark Van Doren and published by Simon and Schuster of New York. Doctor Lumiansky, son of Mr. and Mrs. M. S. Lumiansky of Dar lington, is now a professor of Eng lish at Tulane University. He is a specialist on Chaucer and Middle English and has wirten extensively in the field of English literature. While working for his master's degree at the university, he was a special student of Dr. Henry C. Davis, professor of English under whom he specialized in the history of the English language. He also studied the Anglo-Saxon language and wrote his master's thesis, "George B. Shaw as a Social Critic," under Doctor Davis. SAY... "I saw it in THE GAMECOCK" LEARN THE WAY Men's Finest Clot hing * Kuppenheimer * Kingsridge * Alco SUITS and TOPCOATS ---0 -- NEW FELT HATS * Stetson e Schoble CLASSY FURNISHINGS COPELAND Co. 1409 MAIN STP Georgia Art Paintings Rc Of The Faim The current exhibit c pict of the university is the wo Sallie Aylett Goodwyn, of At born in Mississippi, of Virgil in Missouri and Virginia, bu spent in Georgia, where she her home and has private pup Doctor Jaggers Describes Acute Teacher Problem Deplorable and alarming condi tions produced by a critical short age of teachers in elementary schools were described by Dr. R. E. Jaggers, professor in the school of education, in an interview last week. "State institutions will be asked to increase their elementary teacher output to three or four times that of last year," Doctor Jaggers said. He cited a recent national sur vey on elementary education by Dr. T. M. Stinnett, associate secretary of the National Commission of Teacher Education, which points out that colleges in South Carolina last year graduated only one-fifth the elementary teachers needed to meet that year's requirements. At least 800 new elementary teachers will be needed each year for the next ten years in the state to provide for increased pupil en rulitxiesit anid to replaca retiring teachers and emergency teachers, the survey disclosed. Join the MRC'OF DIAES 2 34 Is T-"V 7"I' 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24'25 26 27 28 29 From Harvard to Hawaii A score highest with college mi Good reason, too, for Aa smart styling and honest valt When you need a good w look, wear and wash well-s ARI UNDERWEAR e NANnKI Page Seven ist Displays presentative iliar South ires in the McKissick Library 7k of a Georgia artist, Miss ,ens, Ga. Miss Goodwyn was iia parentage. She has lived t most of her life has been now maintains a studio in Is. She studied at Lucy Cobb Insti tute in Athens, Pennsylvania Acad emy of Fine Arts, and the Univer sity of Georgia. Her membership in professional organizations in cludes Association of Georgia ar tists, Southern States Art League, Southeastern Art Association, and she has exhibited at the New York World's Fair, in the Georgia build ing; at Intermont College, Bristul, Va., Regional show; Alabama Art Association; Nashville, Tenn.; As sociation of Georgia artists; Uni versity of Georgia, and City Li brary, Athens. Miss Goodwyn's pictures are southern scenes and a few por traits, done in a variety of media, pencil, ink, cont6, water color, charcoal, and oil. Familiar to all who have lived in the country are her series of cotton scenes. "Wait ing to Gin," charcoal, has patient mules flopping their ears in the hot sun while their negro drivers sprawl on the loads of cotton that are lined up awaiting their turn at the gin. Freshly ginned bales are piled in confusion in the back ground, until their owners claim them. "Weighing the Cotton," is another charcoal sketch of the same gin, with new bales of cotton being weighed. "Shovelling Cottonseed Hulls," a watercolor, has the grey tints of the cottonseed that has just been removed from the white lint. "Wagon Eleven" is another clever study of a scene near a cotton gin. "Old Slave's Grave," done in cont6, and "Road to Lula," an ink wash, bring out the artist's skillful use of light and shadow. In the "Road to Lula" the dark mass of a water-tower and low hillocks be yond it are balanced by a building and telegraph lines in sunlight. "View from My Window" was exhibited as part of Georgia's dis play in the New York World's Fair of 1989. This ink drawing is in teresting in its treatment of line and detail. Landscapes include "Little Au tumn Scene," in cont4, "April Morning," "Red Earth," "On the River Road," and "Road to the Check Factory," in oil. Portraits are represented by "Fannie Kate and Children" and "Patsy Douglas," studies in Negro portraiture, and "Mr. Irby." "Frances," "Mr. T. W. Reed," and a study of the artist, herself, all in oil. A pencil drawing of "Dearing Street Tree" and an oil "Mr. Thrasher's Mule," show Miss Good wyn's versatility of subject matter and medium. There are several other pictures in the collection, which will be on - display until Feb. 1 in McKissick library. RROW WHITE SHIRTS mn year after year. row's policy of finest quality, e makes sense to college men. hit, shirt, one that will fit well, .e your Arrow dealer. and TIES RCHIEFS e SPORTS SHIRTS