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Press Rate Collect By George Zuckerman THREE MEN ON A HORSE: Or, The Feeling is Mutual With those two fellows who frequent the local frequencies Jimi Young and F.*d McGrath-vou went the other night to an up town restaurant. The hour was late, too late for Cinderella, iut very early for Count Dracula. At this time, while the wild witnd blew outside, the bags of wind inside louttaciously dissected this troubled world. But before the punning prologue to pessimiisi ensued,. a coulple of quips concerning beaneries were let loose. Jim Young initiated the foray of supposed fun by telling the tale of a restaurant which had this sign on the wall: "Use less sugar and stir like hell; we don't mind the noise." McGrath followed with this one: "Liberal credit allowed if you are over seventy and accompanied by one of your parents." And this interlude was con cluded with: "Free Beer Tomorrow." From that juncture the party became serious. And each to the other mirrowed long, sullen countenances. "I think we ought to start a club." you said. "And we ought to call it the Longface Fellows Association. Our by-laws will call for a diurnal complaint against the fates. And all members must try and talk like John Garfield." "I suggest an amendment," McGrath said. "No members are permitted at the other guy's jokes." Suggesting a motto for the organization, Young said. "(Get a gripe on yourself." McGrath and you promptly broke the rules by laughing. 1ut Young, with his ego pleased, offered no suggestion to suspend us. And besides we had no money in the treasury as yet. Contrary to the magazine advertisements, the conversation at this point did not switch to razor blades-but to tle Brooklyn Dodgers. At the mention of the greatest team in the history of baseball, your face lighted up. In fact, after a few minutes of talk ing about the nine game winning streak, you considered resigning from the Longface Fellows Association, the day of the Brooklyn bellyachers being over. Then you contributed that bit of warped Browning, saying, "0, to be in Brooklyn now that the Dodgers are there!" "You'd better leave for home tonight," Jim said, "because if you wait a while, the Dodgers will really be there-and by there I mean the second division. "You couldn't say that on Flatbush Ave. and live," you ad nioished him. "Listen," Young retorted, "If I found nyself on Flathlush Ave nue I wouldn't want to live." Last winter, out of Brooklyn came the stark story of Murder, Inc. But with the coming of the baseball season and the hegira of horse hides into Bedford Avenue, the conjecture is now current that the killers are really the Dodgers in disguise. Chief witness for the prosecution is Bill Terry, the man woh once raised the question: Are the Dodgers still in the league? If he decided to reiterate at present, the myopic Mr. 'erry couldn't see the Dodgers because they are on top of the league roost, while the Giants are sinking in the second division. Then came the parade of irrelevance. McGrath began by saying: "I think I'm going to write a book about our organization. The title will be: The Gripes of McGrath." Young Ju.L ignorcd the remark. "That reminds me of a good friend of mine," he said. "It seems this fellow was dissatisfied with his religion and seriously considered becoming a Moham medan. IHowever, he gave up the idea when he discovered it w%vas a harem-scarem group. Of course, it's a thinly veiled yarn." Now it was your turn. And you said, "WVell, that brings to mindI memories of the fabulous woodlen I ndian which stood in front of a cigar store on the Bow~ery. It seems the Indian could talk--some thing like Pinnochio and Charley McCarthy. People used to come from all over to hear him talk. WVell this was a short lived fad, be cause in time his monologus became stilted.'' And so into the niight filled with smoak of five cent cigars, with the garrulity of two radlio announcers... -Mission -a ue (CONTINUED FROM PAGE 1)(CNIUDFO PAE) Organized G;routps, Maudle BurnsIlaIui,HelBr,NtioI f Chisholmn and James G'alloway ; \ Com-ain lnn lln n mittee on Finances, Prof. C. F. Mer - dro,Illn Hadl ol cer; Committee on Convocations, Ilatm WV. P. Baldwin., Jr.; Program Comn- esxengradgrsslce mittee, Prof. F. E. Cannon; Comn-ar:BtyHi,IlenIil,Il mittee on Spiritual Resources, Vir- lolae .li cat,Mr ginia Cardwell; Committee' on C'lass- Ld )t, Bty Fucnr rooms, D)r. J. C. Copenhaver ; Comn- Beto o,EiyWle en nmittee on Publicity, Prof. Frank telrstMay in. ajoe Wardlaw; Committee on llTalls and Boi, Mroi Wle, Lc Meeting Places, Prof. R. W. Mor-JoitIlIIit,MyFrne rison; I lospitality Committee. Clifton Mngmr,Mxn obs Strohecker and James TI. Simpson; Gog olb nllai ug andl the Committee on Conservat iont r t etan )ae andl Continuation, Grace K ilgore, -_____ Rev. Charles Seymour, and Charles NahneEto wste frt RE-MayDQuee ICONTLNIEDNROMSERVEC1 chez,.GraldineSchipirc IIele 1427r,Marainlen,Streeetn Thensxteengarsnd girsiseecte are:tBetty Bain,IIeleniLites, Li LydWDoy,Dett Falcrer ettIPopt,MayOKngNMrjri Hrw, MroUWle,Lc 25 Students View Rocks With Smith On Recent Trip Topographic Features Such As Rocks, Fossils Are Features Seen Over 25 students went on the geology field trip Thursday after nmon, April 25, with Dr. L. L. Smith, professor of geology at the University of South Carolina. The trip covered 60 miles, to places along the Newberry road to the old river hed at the Dreher Shoals dam, to Red Springs, and to the 1lang ing Rock area heyond I.exington. At these points various topo graphic features are displayed faults in the rocks, folding, rock weathering, and that which thrilled the students mlost, an tiformnity in the rock beds where more thain a million years of rock was missing. Doctor Smith takes his historical geology class on this trip every spring and invited others to come, too, so that they may better uider stand things they see on their geographic inaps and in the text books. A point. not concerned with geol ogy. btut of especial beauty, was the great area of mountain laurel at IHanging Rock, presenting a pic tures(Iue sceie to the trippers. Alumni (CONTINUED FROM PAGE 1) ing as hosts to the students will be the members of the Alumni Coun cil. These are Presidlent Stoney, Edward . Fersner of Orangeburg, 1.Conard A. Williamson of Aiken, L,eRoy 1.ee, of Kingstree, Robert R. Coker of Hartsville, Harry NI. I.ightsey of Columbia, R. B. Hil derbrand of York, J. Roy Fant of l.ockhart, NI. G. 'McDoiald of Greenwood. Date Leap Year Style E. E. Wehmnen of Charleston, J. C. Shirley of Anderson, C. A. Wells of Edgefield, Sam J. Royall of Flor eice, R. 1. Atikinson of Greenville, W. J. 'McLeod, Jr., of Walterboro, John W. Crews of Columbia, J. S. I-arr, Jr., of Columbia, T. Snyth Flinn of Columlbia. I. I. Rice of Columbia. T. T. Clem ions of Florence. D. A. Gaston of Chester, E. K. Pritchard of Charles ton, R. Milo Smith of Lexington, E. W. Afullins of Columbia, G. B. Timmerman of Lexington, and R. E. Carwile of Columbia. I'he student committees have ar ranged for dating on the leap-year plan, the girls making the (lates with the boys. Only seniors wvill be in vited. Permanent class organization is one of the luain points of Secretary Lewis' program for the Alumni As sociation, andI the meeting is for the pur~pose of arranging for such * MEET YOU] THE TR HOMEMADE: EXCELLENT SODA I We Also Serve A - 4( This Shop Is Owned and Op 2009 DEVINE STREET "Amble Down Your F At CANT SANDWICHES ry Service o A AA Chapel Gets New Hardwood Floor The University chapel has a new hardwood floor throughout, thanks to the W.P.A. This makes the third time that the 118 year old build ing has had to be refloored. Painting of the walls was com pleted by the same organization sev eral weeks ago. Rubober treads have been placed on the steps leading up to the )alcoiy and music depart ment so as to eliminate noise dur ing exercises. Prospects for a new chapel seem gloomy. In the meai time the Uiii versity is doiig everything possible in the way of reparations to make the present building fit for student attenidanice. -Players Give (CONTINUED FROM PAGE 1) members of the cast. Preston West moreland, Nlary Crow, Peggy -len drickson anl Phrilip Wilmeth have solos, anl choruses of the entire east are heard three times. Cast Includes Thirty-Five Besides Anlersoin and Green, imay other students have import ant though minor roles. Mary Crow is "Minnie Belle," Johnny's best girl: and Bill Ward is "Anguish I Howington," Johnny's rival for Minnie Belle's hand. Albert F.ggerton appears as the pompous mayor of the little North Carolina town; and Bob Quinn is "Grampe Joe," the town's ancient Civil War veteran. Jim McKinney edits the newspaper, and Albert Ragsdale is a typical old style pho tographer. In the army. "Captain Valentine" is played by Philip Wilmeth; Paul Posey is cast as a sergeant; Pitkin Bell, lennig Cohei and Robert Putnam are privates, as is "singing cowboy" Preston Westmoreland. Norman Baum plays the part of the Belgian Major-General, and Mil dred Doe is cast as a "war worker." In the "nut-house," Margaret Has kell is a stenographer to the head doctor. "l)octor McBray" is played by Arnold Muir. Peggy Hendrickson is a French nurse, who tries to vamp hero Johnson. Minnie Belle's Aunt Aggie is in terpreted by Lillian Brunson, and Alice Glomitiski is a messenger girl. organizations. Rudy Barnes, Pres ident of the Senior Law Class, said yesterday, "Our class plans to ef fect a permanent organization even before the (late of the dinner meet ing. We are going into alumni work in a big way." Bob Collier expressed hope that the Academic Class would take sim ilar steps soon. This year's class p)lans to have a reunion at the end of one year, and further reunions every five years thereafter. ER FRIENDS AT IANGLE SANDWICHES TOUNTAIN SERVICE LL Bottle Drinks crated By Carolina Students } .. :: FIVE POINTS I'o The Angle" CIGARETTES t-o 10:00 P. MAA Several Lost Articles Are At Post Office Mrs. N. T. Moon announces the following lost articles have been turned in at the post office at the Tniversity of South Carolina: a white sweater, an umbrella, and a girl's hat. Mrs. Moon is taking the final or ders for caps and gowns. All seniors who have not ordered them are urged to see Mrs. Moon at once. She has a few extra invitations that may be had by those seniors who failed to order them. Technical Staff Efficient Belhind the scenes the technical staff has a hard job in putting on the play. Stage Manager for this production is Bob Quinn, who also appears in the play. His assistants are Leonora Vebb, Iucy Carland, Robert Putnam. anl Mary Crow. Chris Green is electrician, and Jane Loyal handles costumes an( properties. Oin the make-up coni mittee are Betty Guthridge and Maxine Forbes. EXCLUS 1631 .Main St. ......... AMERICA'l BU.SIE S ... a'eN smokin WVhen yt it the smo Is it coolr that, you'] because ( Their A their sin~ all help Busiest Make your ni CopyriRg 1940, ' Glee Club Will Sing At Winthrop The University men's glee club goes on what is probably its most important trip Saturday, May 4, when it journeys to Winthrop Col lege for a concert that night. The club will return Sunday and appear in a city-wide chorus of glee clubs. Monday night, May 6, the glee club will hold its first annual han quet. Fntertainment on the program will be supplied by the Foster School of Dance, the Columbia Col lege Glee club, and Buster Spann's orchestra. Dancing will be enjoyed 1)y members of the organization and their (ates following the banquet. Members of the club will receive certificates in recognition of ser vice to the organization for the year. The awards will be made by Prof. H1ugh Williamson, dean of the Music School and director of the choral group. .dwin l'atterson will be toast master. LV dolumbia. S& Amer Chicag< keep th) er-Smoli E TTE a sterfi 's definitely milder.4 g... better-tasting cit >u buy a pack of cigar< ker's perfect quiz. .. ] Does it taste better? 1 turn by choice to Cl lhesterfield has all the lend of the best tobaccos re, shape and the way the to make Chesterfield An Cigarette. xt pack Chesterfie ~ou can't buy a h Letters (CONTINUED FROM PAGE 4) No, Miss Wilson, we of ColuI bia do not begrudge anything Winthrop has. Nor will we fail to cheer when your band plays at the Fair. But we, as you, are ashamed of South Carolina's high illiteracy ratio, and are grieved that the lesser things should be placed first. In short, fellow South Carolinian, your whole letter is malicious and without foundation. Your antipathy for Carolina and your zeal to say something, however trivial, obviously caused you to write. (Signed) Deward Brittain. "Miss Synthetique," a doll, clemonstrated textile innovations to itudents at College of Mount St. Joseph. ECONOMY DRUG STORE Motorcycle Delivery CUT RATE DRUGS SODAS AND LUNCHEONETTE Five Points Phone 8119 ...... ... a's Busiest Corner i's Madison and State where Officers HARRY N and THOMAS McGINTY e traffic moving. And corner CHESTERFIELD ica's busiest cigarette smokers have found efinitely Milder, Cool ing and Better-Tasting. L eld .cooler jarette ~ttes, give s it mild? If you do iesterfield answers. grown, y burn, Id tor Cigar.tf