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SPECULUM VITAE By DINKY WILLIAMS PIPE-DREAMS ] A Southern Conference Football Championship. A Million Dollar o U n i v ersity Ap- v propriation. ti An Honor System, w without Discrep- "N ancies. ti Telephones In h Every Tenement, E Outside Lines. Sane and Safe a Driving Move- n ment By Stu- " dents. h Over 20,000 Enroll ment In Univer- p sity. b MID-TERM BONERS Our Father which are in Heaven, Harold be thy name. The letters M.D. signify "mentally deficient." e Blank verse is to poetry what the forward pass is to football. I pass. What part did the U. S. Navy play in the world war? Answer: It played the Star Spangled Banner. Skeleton-bones with the person rubbed off. PUTRID POETRY The little dog ran all over the street, Along came a steam roller, The little dog ran all over the street. WEEK'S PHILOSOPHY I'd would consider marriage if I weren't sure I would be satisfied with it. Dog lovers are people with inferi ority complexes. Everyone has to be important to something and it's easy to be important to a dog.-John Held, Jr. A certain professor has enough weakness of character to be charming. Name upon request. MISTAKES When a plumber makes a mistake, he charges twice for it. b< When a lawyer makes a mistake, he t has a chance to try the case again. When a carpenter makes a mistake, it is just what he expected. When a judge makes a mistake, it " becomes the law of the land. When a preacher makes a mistake, nobody knows the difference. ir When a doctor makes a mistake, he buries it. p When an editor makes a mistake, he sends it out for the world to :0 see. Wow! ALONE AT LAST Before I hear the doctors tell 0 The danger of a kiss I had considered kissing you The nearest thing to bliss. But now I know biology, I sit and sigh and moan; Six million mad bacteria And I thought we were alone. ADD BONERS IN NEW PAPE S a And they were married and lived - happily even after-Church World. Three hundred thousand freshmen entered American institutions of higher yearning this fall. Princeton Seminary Bulletin. Dig the ground over thoroughly and then pant.-Gardening article. We have not done any business with firms or persons in America Prohibition came into force in that country.-London Dispatch. QUOTED Cigarette Our passion glowed In the night Like a cigarette And then you let the Red coal fade. Tomorrow night Some other mutt u Unknowingly t Will smoke the butt. DEFINITION 1) Professor-a hired bit of camou-. flage placed around the stadium, field house and gym to give them the ap pearance of a university. SIMILE OF WEEK Your eyes are blue, like twin tea spoonfulls of the Mediterranean. NOTICE: JUNE GRADUATES College men are a lazy lot, They always take their ease; Even when they graduate, They do it by degrees. ITEMIZERS The Gamecock will, hereafter, be at least eight pages. Professor DePass commends the -new front page makeup. Thanx. In contrast: Altitude Smith, 6 feet, 7 inches and Freshman Cone, 5 feet, 5 inches. Collegiate Digest would eat this up. Why, when a team loses, does the coach get all the blame? I WANT A GIRL.... to be like a cigarette-warm, smooth, slender and white-one that will satis fy, give a lift and not irritate. Finally, although I like her easy to discard-I don't want her to burn up. Any takers? 0. D. K.i 'hose Seeking A 1ust Report Pohi Omicron Delta Kappa, national hon rary leadership fraternity at the Uni- e ersity will elect men to membership in ie organization within the next few ( eeks, Bob Hemphill, president, an- n unced this week. Men desiring to have teir names placed for membership must ave a list of their points turned in by ecember 1. o At least 100 points are required to make student eligible for membership. A iong these points must be at least 40 hich the student has obtained from the 3 dlding of a major campus office. The membership committee to which :ints may be turned in is composed of rank Jordan, Newt Harmon, and Wer r Bryan. ' 3 d f f ci si ac ot 1 KAPPP pi di BOB HEMPHILL A list of points counted towards mem rship in the group follows: POINTS OF OMIlCRON DELTA KAPPA I. .najor Points President of Student Bodv 75. l; Phi Beta Kappa 60 (No other points SScholarship) allowed.) Captain Major Sport 60 (No other nints in that Sport allowed). Mianager Football 60 (No other points i Football allowed ). 1 Editor of Gamecock 60 (No other ints for Editorial Staff). ci Editor of Garnet and Black 60 (No al ther points for Staff Work.) Business Manager Garnet and Black di 3 (No other points on Bpsiness Staff). Business Manager Gamecock 60 (No ther points on Business Staff allowed). President of K. S. K. 60 (No other ints for Membership or Minor office). President of Junior or Senior Class g President of Y. M. C. A. 50. ci President of Literary Society 50 (No ther points for minor offices). sc President of Law Federation 50. Letter Major Sport 40 (5 points each Iditional year). C Degree Applications] Due On December 1 Registrar John A. Chase, Jr., re quests that all undergraduates seek img (degrees in June, 1938 make ap plication before Dec. 1. There will be a penalty after this date. The 0l deadline for graduate degrees is ' April 1. c< Students should first go to the E treasurer's office to select diplomas. These are of two types. $1 anld $2.50. o Receipt for paymen't of the diploma d fee should then be presented at the registrar's office, where application e& blanks will be given ouit and scho- w~ lastic status will be checked. C --ci "Silk soap," a produict containing to .per cent low grade silk waste, is t aid to have special cleansing and dis- b< ifectant properties. It is being mian factured in s'everal European coun-' Tfhe forsythia is a shrub which v, ears a yell6w flower.p Ionces ffiliation its By Dec. 1 Manager of Major Sport (football xcluded) 40. President Inter-fraternity Council 40 No points allowed for membership or tinor offices). President German Club 40. Treasurer German Club 40. Managing Editor Gamecock 40 (No ther editorial staff points). Minor Office Student Body 40. President of Law Class 40. Captain of Tennis 40. 'OTE: Student or applicant must have at least one major activity to his credit to be eligible for admission. II. Minor Points Cheer Leader 30 (No points for As stant Cheer Leader). Captain Minor Sport (except Tennis) ) (No other points same sport). Member Social Cabinet 30. President Cotillion Club 30. Treasurer Cotillion Club 30. President Social Fraternity 30 (Presi ent not allowed points as Treasurer or - an Hellenic representative). President Sophomore Class 30. Athletic Advisory Board 30. Board Publications 30. Drum Major 30. (No other points for , and membership). President Glee Club or Symphony Or testra 25 (No points membership). F President Honorary or Professional roup 25 (No other points for member Pc up). Editor Y Handbook 25 (No other ints for membership V. M. C. A.) Business Manager Handbook 25 (No I her points for membership Y. M. C. A.) i Departmental Scholarship 20. t Treasurer Social Fraternity 20 (No her points for Interfrat Council or resident ). President Freshman Class 20. Business Manager Glee Club or Sym iony Orchestra 20 (No mer-bership lints extra). Debating Team 20 (5 points each ad tional year.) Letter Minor Sport 15 (5 points each klitional year). Captain Froshi Major Sport 15 (No t her points same sport for that year). Manager Frosh Major Sport 15 (No r 'ints for assistant extra). Assistant Cheer Leader 15. s Mi cr Office German Club 15. \ Minor Office Interfraternity Council I (No membership points). Association Editor Publications 15 Jnly one office counted). Minor Office Junior or Senior Class j Minor Class Law or Law Federation a Chairman or Secretary Debating Coun 1 15 (No membership points addition Minor Office Y. M. C. A. 15 (No ad najOl membcrsh;p poi.s). Fresh Numerals in Major Sport 10. Member Interfraternity Council 10. Minor Office Fresh Class 10. Minor Office Sophomore Class 10. Membership honorary or Professional 'oup 10. t First three minor offices Literary So ety 10-others 5. Dean's Honor List 5 points for each mester. Freshman Numerals Minor Sport 5. Member Band, Glee Club or Symphony rchestra 5. Players Plan Dne Act Play The University players will present a ie-act play, A TRICK OF THE RA~DE, for those attending the press nference in Drayton 1Hall, beginning 'ecember the first. This conference will be in the nature a short course in newswriting con ected by the Extension Division of the miversity'. It is open to all publicity lairmen of the various local and state ide organizations throtughouit South arolina. "A Trick of the Trade" is a v'ery ever newspaper episode, requiring only mo characters. Tryouts were held yes rday in Drayton Hall. TIhe cast will announce.d next week. Professor ephan, Director of the University layers, has appointed Tom Rogers 'rake to act as director for this play. -U. .. 0.-. One of the most important uses of ~getable fiber is the manufacture of ftper. DECEMBER YOU'LL NEED A THAT GOI FINER' m DRES STUDS :-: CO] We Are Headque THE HOP Election EDITS ANNUAL As I v, p j 0( a vI ti 01 b C J g n vewt Harmon, Editor Garnet & Black a( McKissick in New York t( President J. Rion McKissick, accom- g ianied by Mrs. McKissick and Dr. si eorge R. Sherrill, professor of politi- it al science, left Monday for New York tl chere he is attending to University busi ess. On his way back from New York, 'resident McKissick will stop at Wash- n ngton to attend the annual meeting of a he National Association of State Ui- ti ersities being held in that city. t< -U. U. 0.--p Clarios Pick p New Members Ten new members were elected into le Clariosophic Literary society and nine r 'ere initiated into membership Tuesday ight. si Those elected vere: 11. S. Reese, Jud- s on Gatch. Densor Johnson, Cordrey L' Vofford, V. L. Keisler, Hal Norman, r lugh Lister, Eugene Chase, and Stan y J. Hayes. Initiated into the society were John ;arner, Ed Patterson. Leonard Berry, . Udrich Anderson, Alan Bailey. Charlie \skinson, V. L. Keisler, H. S. Reese, , nd James Campbell. One week from Tuesday, the Clario ophic literary society will meet in joint ession with the Euphradian to discuss nd revise The Gamecock constitution. -U. B. e. The Moabite stone, 90 B. C., is the Idest known Hebrew-Phoenician form if writing. Denmark, Holland, and Germany f iave banned the importation of par- t 'ots. t Flies were raised at the WVashington D. C.) zoo and fed to frogs and izards. ( a 44 TUXEO AN AL |SWIH T ['UXEDOSD L to *35=2 S SHIRTS to *22 irters For Dress Clothes 'o Rent! 'E-DAVIS CO. Yew Mem University Senio Gamecock's We University school spirit is often the lbject of heated debates on the cam as and on street corners in all parts [ the state. Ve are all rather familiar ith this subject. Some say there is no :hool spirit at the University and offer irious suggestions why there is none. We were rather curious to know what ie opinion of some of the students were i this; an important question. A num r of seniors were asked this question: Why can't the University of South arolina have school spirit and cheering the football games, etc. like other hools?" Of course we got varied an vers to this. I lere are the answers: immy Thomas, Senior "Ten per cent of the law school are j raduates of other colleges and they have spirit for Carolina. They do not :l1 at the games because they don't ant to. They are the oldest students id have great influence over the younger udents. "One person can throw a damper over small crowd and those yelling are made feel silly by the the looks of. those o "dignified" to yell. Usually those >o dlignified to yell for school will for et their dignity in other places. In cad of letting persons too lazy to yell ifluence others, the others should let iem know what they think of them. 'letcher Spigner, Jr., Senior "The University student body can offer acceptable explanation why it doesn't lpport its own football team. The only me we yell and really encourage the am is when a spectacular run is in ogress, or after a touchdown has been ade-in other words, when they don't ced encouragement. At present we are sing games. Those boys need our sup )rt now as never before, and we've got come across. It isn't right, nor is it ir, and what's more, isn't it cowardly desert." aul A. Smith, Senior "The school spirit at Carolina is as ncere as you will find at any other hool. Every Carolina student loves the niversity, but I firmly believe that the ason for lack of display of spirit dur g football games and etc.. is traditional. 'hat we need is a revolution in athletics. 'hen a change (for the better) takes ace in Carolina athletics there will be outburst suppressed enthusiasm that ill be heard through out the county." SCHOOL OF The Universit A four year curriculum completed f the quarter plan. The dental at liated. Dental students have two he direction and supervision of thi ice of dentistry, in all its varie ental division and is connected wi ne month of interneship in a hospi ear, offering unusual experience nd treatment of (dental condition, tart t-he first week in July, 1938. For further infor 5 Goodrich Street SCHOOL OF I We predict Saturday's g THE WINDSOR An Arrow shirt with a newly designed smart tabIess tab col Jar. Higher band front arnd back:; square jaunty points. *2i bers Soon rs Answer ek1y Query John Swearingen, Senior "There's no reason why Carolina can't have school spirit and yells like othg schools. The attitude of the stude seems to be, "Let the other fellow yell. I don't want to be bothered." I thik we could go a long way towards reme y. ing that situation by getting some yells hat bring out that old bubbling-over feel, ing which only a few of us ever displa Then too, how about..our songs? Most f us don't even know the Words." Hank Surrency, Senior -- "The reason I think we do not hasi etter spirit at our home football game ire several. "Forts and most important is that the students do not know the football players y their names and are not very in crested in them. We need to have a :loser contact between the players and students. If the students know the play. ers personally they will take greater in. erest in the games and our spirit at tome games would be the same as at -ther schools. In other schools the foot. all players are shown more courtesy 5y the students on the campus and this iccounts more than anything else for the spirit of the team and the spirit of the students at the home games. Bill Simpson, Senior "Carolina has some of the best poten ialities as far as spirit is concerned, but for some reason they have never been leveloped. It seems that since the days f Earl Clary, when spirit was at a peak, he cheerleaders elected have not been :apable of holding the students together. )ur cheers are ones that most high chools use and certainly no originality. Then too another major cause of the lack )f spirit is that the student body wants mly to support a winning ball club. They iave no desire or interest in a team that ias taken "it on the chin" for a few ears." --U. ". 0. It looks as though one teacher has more pupils "than she can shake a stick at." At the Congaree Negro :chool the single instructor now has 105 enrolled young charges. COLUMBIA OFFICE SUPPLY CO. PRINTING COMMERCIAL STATIONERY - OFFICE EQUIPMENT 1112 Lady St. Phone 5163 DENTISTRY y of Buffalo l in three calendar years, by means d medical schools are closely at rears of basic medical study under e medical faculty. Clinical prae d aspects, is supervised by the th the clinics of several hospitals. tal of 1200 beds, during the senior in clinical observation, diagnosis ;. The next regular session will mation address ~ENTISTRY Buffalo, New York f or ame.. That the best-dressed spec tators will be wearing tab less-tab collar shirts. WVatch this important style develop on your campus. SHIRTSJ >aa ft and Saninorized