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SPECULUM VITAE By DINKY WILLIAMS STOLENOTHINGS A quiet room with lights turned low; A soft touch on my shoulder; A warm breath on my cheek; A little face against by own Who let that darn cat in? SCENOGRAPHY The hounds are yelping, bayingly approaching, and the hunters, the type that shoot rabbits with buck shot in their beds, are hot on the trail. Ah, this is the sport of kings. Yes, the grumblerumbles from the Monday morning quarter backs and the beer owdies has begun against the coach ing system and re sults at Carolina. It is the same cycle, as inevitable as the depression and prosperity eras. These fansaps do not pause to reflect that with a twelve-game schedule, the Gamecocks have defeated Emory and Henry, Davidson, The Citadel, tied the University of North Carolina, lost a close tilt to Georgia, played Alabama the undefeated Tied, one of their hardest games of the season, fumbled away to Clemson and lost to Ken tucky despite acquiring the same num ber of first downs ad spending most of the afternoon in the Kentucky Col onels backyard-without mint juleps. That isn't bad for any team. After all, one must stop to refict that this is the University of South Carolina. Foot ball to us is not a big-time racket. We haven't the money to get the top grid stars, the best of everything but we turn out creditable teams. Coach Mc Callister has done well with the ma terial and backing he has had. This season will show more wins than losses and next year will be his peak. In fact, when the season is over, these same shouting fans will be again shouting for a renewal of his contract, and I'll wager McCallister says "Nuts!" and gets a better position. MID-TERMADNESS I put my trust and faith in you I thought I could rely But now I disillusioned am, I wish that I might die, I made you my ideal you see And so I copied you, But I should have copied someone else, 'Cause now I'm flunking, too. TOASTSALUTES To Charles Lee and Louise Fry for their roles in recent production by University Players. Featured they were with a good cast in a play well directed and smoothly presented. Of course, the audience wasn't packed. This is South Carolina. ADDEFINITIONS Bankruptcy-putting all your money into your pants pickets and letting your creditors take the coat and "shirt off your back." , Goblet-a young sailor. Pretzel-a doughnut gone crazy. Adult-one who has stopped grow ing except in the middle. Fate-a warped orchestration of the symphony of life. SAPRO VERB A fool and his money are some party. PHILOSOPHYEILDS Let us endeavor to so live that even undertakers will be sorry when we die. -Mark Twain. CLOUDREAMS What a la mode is to pie, what a tie is to a gentleman, what victory is to the athlete, that's what twilight is to day. THINGS UNKNOWN 'TIL NOW That dancing to swing music-1200 students-generate enough heat to warm a two-story house for two days in ordinary winter weather. Enough energy is released to raise a five-ton elephant 32 miles in the air....that half a millon dollars is spent annually in Columbus, Ohio, by the members of fifty-one social fraternities and pro fessional organizations at Ohio State University.. .. and they say it's not a racket. .. .that Carolina came within one vote of having the United States Military academy now located at West Point... .that the Carolina student that spends his vacation periods em balming bodies is taking a class with the co-ed that used the summer hours in pedalling a bicycle for an oil com pany. ... anything for an education. GIBBUSENSE 'Twas just a kiss I asked you for And you gave your consent. And then I asked if e'er before Your kisses you had lent. When you said "No" in tone so meek, My chest swelled out in pride. But when you showed me your technique I knew darn well you lied! -Bear Tracks. AGREE? A sensible girl is not as sensible as she looks because a sensi ble girl has more sense than to look sensible. POEMAYBE Under the spreading mistletoe The homely co-ed stood, And stood, and stood, and stood And stood-and stood-and-stood. PARAPHRASEOLOGY Lives there a man with soul so dead Who never to himself has said, To heck with studies, I'm goirig to bed. L MUSCI Someone remarking that in the courte sies part of the program for Bill of Divorcement should have been placed the notice: "Louise Fry donated by courtesy of Dick Little".... Willoughby Dixon pushing a lemon meringue pie into the face of a girl friend. ...and having it come back right between the eyes after Jane Crout had peeled it from the coun tenance of the damsel in distress.... Lois Jeter remarking that she doesn't like cats or dogs, she likes sail boatsl (Nice little sail boat, nice little sail boat).... Lyn Edwards and Lenny Kap lan seeing who could be the biggest fool at Tom Rodgers Drake's party Saturday night.... Ralph Dearth telling Guard Big Dur ham that "A guard is a quarterback with his brains knocked out".... Lane \Vood cock embarrassing Jeannette Watts by re moving his tux collar in Drayton Hall John Dargan Rogers stating that he knew his clothes were good looking since his fraternity brothers disapproved of them. ...A student remarking that he liked Professor Coker's astronomical "conservatory.... Doctor Babcock remarking that one can't drive a herd of sheep through Co lumbia because it is against the law to make a "ewe turn"....(phew).... Bill Overton wondering why he stopped go ing out for varsity football when the B team felt it necessary to send in two men to take his place. ...The Clario sophic Literary Society wondering whether it exists or not since it has no officers as yet. Louis Searson apologizing for his mu sical love 'l'schaikowskv since he read Relovt'd Friend. .. . Bert Flowers posing as an authority on life and love and tell Standard Business Courses Comptometer, Salesmanship and Accounting Columbia Commercial College 1556 Main Street Telephone 2-3288 Columbia, South Carolina EE "s a V""t i. . .. ing of his "What to Do".... Professor Woods trying to move into his office in the Student Union Building and finding it occupied by a hundred mattresses.... Frances . Thomas telling of her latest conquest .... One of the midgets from the recent show at Drayton Hall....and also telling of the time a half wit proposed and said that he would treat her right, he'd buy her a pair of shoes....Dave \Vebb telling us that he is a maniac de pressive and he can't help being down in the dumps.... Ed Varner telling the pleasant stranger Dn the train just what he thought of the football team and then finding out that :he stranger was Coach Stamman.... Eu phradian receptions are underway again: Matthew Poliakoff has taketi up smoking again....You should smell the cigars ....The infirmary stating that an emer gency is a critical or possibly painful :ondition threatening fatality. ...Harriet Hlolman and Neeta Turner eating dinner >ver at the Mess Hall.... -U. S. 0. -Players (Continued from Page One) plays; "Redemption," "The Ninth Guest," and "Bury the Dead," last years productions. It is said that the superb acting of Charles Lee, Lois Jeter, an(d Louis Fry-not excluding he rest of the performers-was among the best seen in Columbia. The same cast will be use(l at Win throp as was used at )ravton Hall, which includes Charles Lee, Lois feter, Louis Fry, Philip \Vilmeth, Tom Rogers Drake, Bill Hamlet, Wrav Graves, and Edwin Patterson. COLUMBIA SPECIAL RATE IF THEY LEAVE THEIR LA BY 12 O'CLOC 1323 Taylor Street Md}:.:}1,[::.a"}:}".t::}"}}"'v,r},}t:a;}v":": " :' ."\ :y"\.\1:.i:"}:t \Y i : :\:" }f ttt ::": 'r ;::?::fv:a::""}:v:'r":i<}}::': :;} }4 :,> . i"t \ kw. :.y:c}:{, '{v:?') a t1 , \a:a ti \ \: " "a'ti .. ':i "t . .c 1: \},:.i: .i+ }" "T } " }i;:":: } .:"ta a}r a. :. r1 \\::.' avi I iia\ \:.\ " ' # ":;,tv{} 4 }"{,} 2 A ;. :t ;}?} " a }:}}a:.ti:".: 1 \ a \\h"aa} vtii :""' \ t }' {;":i""{.}1 \4.\ } :: v vt":}:r {:. . ,a t.\"\ \ \ \ .a,'-:i"{;i;}T a, a: : : \, a { ti ;:i J }:"ya,.-{{.h.{. ::r::} r iyi:':::i:: "'" c. ":}:.ti:t{:\:{}}:-":":^: 'i {?iti9a\(av >ak ~att i ":":" C o.{ "'.".} : w : ::":: ;.. }":: : t" : }+ a aa a".i{ -Clarios (Continued from Page One) Sidney Duncan, the election was de clared null and void temporarily be cause it was held when men who were not members of the society were in th< hall. Emerson Smith took the floor, and although interrupted continuously, suc ceeded in making the motion that th< society vote on Quillen immediately This motion was ruled out of order by the president because the time for elec tion of honorary members is specified as the first Tuesday in each month. Bill Bochman then rose to call foi a ruling declaring the election of the two men unconstitutional for the samt reason that the election of Robert Quillen was thrown out. Just as the pandemonium reached its height, Sidney I)uncan took the chair, but a motion for adjournment passed mid further confusion. Mem bers remained in the hall for about 30 minutes still debating the legality of what had happened. -U. S. 0. Say you saw it in The Gamecock. HAVE RTY Furniture Co. "A GREAT STORE IN A GREAT CITY" 1638 Main Street LAUNDRY 3 TO STUDENTS UNDRY AT THE CANTEEN K EACH DAY Telephone 4954 ome wme..r p . 1.:3"S.wv?.$v:}}"::::...:tv..~. ;LL ,}Yv - ti:"3:"{v~~~. . . . ..'}-}?}::i: ii"}:i?i.:t . +'.. -Money Raised (Continued from Page One) eration of The Gamecock and the en tire staff in this movement. For some time our organizations have felt the need' of such a song. We do not intend to criticize any song now known and sung as a song of the students of the University of South Carolina. We plan to supplement the present songs with a real fighting song that will mean something when sung and will fill the heart with warmth. It is our earnest hope and desire that we may foster more spirit on this campus. We hope the student body will co operate with us in our endeavors in behalf of a "Greater Carolina." Sincerely, Bob Hemphill, mae Maner. -Birds-Hurricane (Continued from Page One) ternity. School busses will transport the Columbia students from the college to the Stadium, where members of Blue Key and the University band will escort them to their seats in a section BUSINESS Is Essential to Everyone, Pa Women. Day, Night, DRAUGHON'S BU; 1218 Sumter Street :-: Frank W. Lykes, Pres. Mrs. D. T. Faulkin1 COLLEGIANS KN -MEET BIHA AIR COND) RESTAURANT ANt REFINED AT 1229 Hampl SEA FOOD- A -ncored 47 Nat e L ore.... pleasosredm theeverltheycarea.t. cOe anad oc Chesterfieldsfmi world. They're refresh They're different and b adjoining that of the University dent body. The Furman student body, facu, and supporters will occupy the eas stands and boxes. Coach Don McCallister. Stunts during the halves of the game will also be by the girls, wlth Miss Louise King ident of the Columbia student bod j charge. Arrangements for the occasion are - the hands of the local chapter of Blue Key, national honorary leadership fra. PAIN IN THE FEET, LEGS, HEELS? TIRED. ACHIN,. RHEUMATIC LIKE FEET LEG PAINS. CALLOUSES OR SORE HEEU. -THESE ARE SIGNS OF WEAK OR FALLEN ARCHES. IF you are having foot trouble, conult a POD IATR IST (ON WO SPEIAIZES IN AN TR ONLY ABNORMAL CONDITIOSDAF TET. ING THE FEET). E DR. 0. M. BOMAR PODIATRIST PHONE 516 - OFFICE 1431 MAIN TRAINING rticularly College Men and and Special Classes IINESS COLLEGE Telephones 5951 and 8317 Wm. Lykes, Jr., V.-Pres. berry, Sec.-Treas. OW GOOD FOOD AT RI' S [TIONED I DELICATESSEN dOSPHER E on Street SPECIALTY 11 m,t g e on Mai an uple li a mothon of he: ingl midr , milse ofsoe. h s mok-oersfh ker