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U.S.C Kind Solons Promise Pool Build Small Swim Tanh No Bottom To Aquatic Monstros ity Although Numerous showers Dot Surrounding Landscape One of the smallest swimming pools in the state, 3 miles wide by 9 miles long, will be instructed on the sod in front of the gym, according to a report from the legislature. The stupendous amount of $1.91J4 has been appropriated for this gigantic construction. ?3 Miles? I i CO to <u ? ? q> to I I ?3 Miles? The new pool (not the game) will have an over-production of bath houses, just in case the customers do not get to take a bath in pool. Ten bran new showers will be put in the men's house (designed by Chic Sales) while five will be installed in the wimmen's (designed by Mrs. Sales). The reason for there only being five showers in the femail house is that they naturally take more baths and won't need one when they get in front of the gym. And besides, there are plenty of showers over in the Jim. There will be no bottom to the pool on account of the fact that about all the $1.92y? will be used in putting on sides. There will be no tower either, as the top of the Jim Nasium can be used for this purpose. The question has been raised as tc what would happen if Madame Sweeney and Coach Pauley would attempl to enter the pool at the same time 1 he question is still being raised. Attentio] Beard-C We Will Give The FREE i THE COLLEGE JUST BACK OF C 1008 Sun GUT RATE Isn't Fooling Whe: Merchandise At GOME TO OUR STORE AN THAT WE ALSO HI PATTEI . Pants . Hats . Shirts # Neckv AT PRICES TO SUIT YOU THAT C U T MEN'S For Economi 1430 Mi DO NOT BE MISLED, LOOK ' Gets Sport Scribe Bolts Batmen w Wuxtral Wuxtral Gamecock Sports Editor disappears 1 Floyd D. Rodgers, Jr., (picture on left) anemic and sporadic sports scribbler for the University has vanished. It is said that his sud1 den departure for parts unknown was caused by rumors of armed members of the baseball team searching for him with instructions reading, Shoot to killl Chico Brown, enraged by a recent baseball story appearing in The State crediting him with the loss of a game when it wasn't him at all, is supposed to be leading the chase with Bernard James, loudly bewailing the fact that he is a heavy rock-rapper for the team and didn't get credit for it in the same story, close on his heels. At right is a picture of the hunted sports writer as last seen?a three days growth of fuzz on his face (sprouted i before he found that members of the ! Gamecock staff were not eligible for Caroli r Foxy Femmes Flash Form ; In Titular Tennis Tilt Hamby-Hankins Hand Hexitement To All Hands As Hamby Wins Marvelous Match An inquiring freshman wearing a white linen coat and a black pair of I corduroy pants set off by a brilliant red necktie, flurried into the sports : editor's office leaving behind him a series of overturned chairs and flying [ copy paper. 1 "Could you tell me who won the i girls tennis tournament?" ' "Do you mean to tell me that you ; haven't heard of that memorable match between Dolly Hamby and ? Mary Hankins that lasted seven long hours and which necessitated the use t of ten umpires to watch the flashing . ball as it sped back and forth across the net? What a match! There was n Youse Growers! Five Runner-Uppers SHAVES BARBER SHOP COLLEGE TAVERN iter Street MEN'S SHOP n They Say?Better Cut Rate Prices D LET US CONVINCE YOU LVE THE SNAPPIEST INS IN? rear AND WITH A GUARANTEE COUNTS R A T E > SHOP ical Smartness tin Street FOR THE NAME CUT RATE i r.'.. - . i. J. 4??J v' , V /?.. . - . ^ ? i i ii'in a Swim \ the beard-growing competition) and a hunted look in his eye from backing 1 around corners trying to avoid any- i one who even walked like a pitcher or 5 heavy rock-rapper. In his absence 4 this issue is being gotten out by Guitar 1 Smith?long famous for his motto? f "Every athlete a star." 1 a Co-E' Dance Prof Invents Game Shannonski Mimskivitch, famous authority on the light fantastic, in a recent exhibition at the Y. M. C. A. suddenly startled all spectators by performing like a combination Hercules and the "Man on the flying trapeze." The famous professor has almost succeeded in instituting a new and original sport among his many admirers on the campus. It is called "Catch as catch can," the object is not to be caught napping, if such is the case, however, the floor is the recipient and therefore, the winner. Few were the occasions when the founder of this new and already popular sport were outwitted by this formidable opponent. Catch as catch can owes its popularity, to a great extent, to the fact that both sexes can participate in it at one , and the same time. There is but little needed in the way of apparatas, a ? partner, a bottle of gin, a waxed boor and a dance tune. C ' U. 8. C. ( a slight hitch in the fourth set when ( Dolly found that she had a run in her i stocking and she had to retire to be r re-conditioned. < (Continued next issue) t Spring GRUNT-GROWL BOY 1 ON CLEMSON TEAM Special to the Gamecock?Not to be outdone by Carolina, Clemson College i has recently created a new spring a sport?wrestling. The cut above c shows one of the huskies on the team, ( typical of the corn-fed products pro- 1 duced by South Carolina's famous A. S and P. M. College?usually P. M. Sow We Doin'? Moth-eaten Mollie, as this masterful mastodon of the mat is affection1 ately called by Clemsonites, is the mother of?(podden us, thought for a minute this was the Better Babies write-up) is expected to win the Grunt Growl, and Gargle contest of the two Carolinas. Measurements of the Tiger mat idol are as follows: Chest?Six to a side, standing room only. Corkscrew to grunt?Two flea-flops and a flllup. Mouth?All bull and a yard wide. Clemson is proud, and justly so, of her new athletic endeavor, Cuts of various athletes are available from the animal husbandary division. Visitors are welcomed at work-outs of the team ?but are cautioned against more than one car of corn to a man. r . x .. Pool j Muscle Men Pique Pauley Migawd, migawd, migawd, sighed Wrestling Coach. Pauley, as he surveyed the new University of South Carolina wrestling team for the first ime, some of you-uns (tryin' out his 'Southern accent") musta swunk up. Plucking one of the reticent rasslers rom under the instep of his patented Sfo. 11 ]/2 Pauley held him wriggling >efore the light. Huummramn, he muttered, "Yes, I hink I sec just one little speck of intestinal fortitude, or is it just your iinner? But you lads shore got a long vay to go." The team averages 98J4 pounds per i? nan with their winter underwear on g md look like muscle-bound hunks of k spaghetti. The toilest of the lads is ? I feet, G inches on his best arch sup- b sorters and the smallest registers 3 si eet, 8 inches on a step-ladder. w The hair-raising picture at the right a ds Cut Skiing Begins In Late June Due to the fact that the University "j gymnasium will be used as a branch jffice for the Goodyear Rubber Com- ? >any during the summer, there has jeen a diligent search for some means o exercise the Summer School Stulents. After careful consideration by f, he proper authorities skiing was de- |S| :ided upon. ^ Skiing is a sport very closely related b o football; participants of this sport vho devote themselves to year-round L studying will probably be given a pref- b irence by Coach Oogla, Wilburn L w-larcy has especially met the approval |} )f this trekking wixard from Alaska. 1 here will be a short fall training L >criod before regular practice begins. Very strict training rules are to be ob- " served according to the Coach. Whale Blubber and absolutely no W .wcets, said Coach Olgla when asked I g 'bout the diet for the players. He also | idvocated twelve months observation \ >f training rules, and was especially I ^ emphatic on the no smoking part. n smoking increases the tempature and h, enders one more suceptible to the rig- L )rs of cold to which one is exposed in |v his sport, said Coach Oogla. I ^ Sports [ COLUMBIA COLLEGE I SMOOCHES ONWARD j; Six Carolina sophomores were killed 111 n the rush and one Freshman suffered K t nervous break-down at the opening -lass in Capable Courting held at 11 Columbia College last Saturday night, o t was the first of a series of Spring, c 111,11 courting I * Tsk! Tsk! Tskl ichools to be put on by the Columbia -ollegc Colics?podden?frolics as all >art of their athletic program. Tessie Twitchit, late of hours, Tor- J id lexas, and points cast?and the I ?oys say that Tess has her points, too -is in charge of the school. Flossie iex offers the lads courscs in the ground work of the gentle art while I Osculating Olivia docs the instructions n the higher branches of the art. "We're tired of these Carolina gawks and their awkward brand of I oving, one C. C. gal announced. "If I here has got to be loving we don't vant it awkward." The cut above illustrates Columbia I college technique as demonstrated by I Osculating Olivia and a reticent Caro- II ina Freshman. Columbia. S (T r m m I | Sotr ? Pauley in his official coaching disuisc. He has to wear a false-face to eep from scaring the team to death. Ic has begun his spring training table y gradually building the team up on kimmed milk and saltincs. Later he 'ill increase the diet to boiled custard nd lady-fingers. Capers Gallopin Galls Gallant Gals !n Horseback Harem Standing Rules Govern Lassies Who Lope Lover's Lanes On Leaping Mounts A flash of color and merry shouts roni hurrying forms astride fiery teeds was the scene presented the past ;eek as the girls horse-back riders egan their daily practice. Many envious comments were heard 11 every hand by other fair maidens ut other experienced girls whispered lto their ears comforting words. Ah, ut wait, were the magic words. And wait they did until night, when lie riders returned. When a few moments later hideous groans came from lie dashing horsewomen's room. The ther girls investigated. There they ouiid the girl atheletes struggling to it down in chairs that were filled with large number of soft cushions and tanding with their feet in a basin of ot water. (We don't sec the conection between the hot water and orse back riding either.) Similiar cenes were enacted in the other rooms /ith girls writhing and groaning on heir beds in a manner best fitted to wrestling match. The following day, the command /as given for the girls to be seated for heir mid-day repast. Strange to say, 8 lassies remained on their feet. On loser scrutiny, they were found to be iouc other than the members of that ew and popular sport being offered Carolina Co-eds. The coach wishes new aspirants for he team as a large number of the riginal members were forced to disontinuc their riding as it interfcrred Ip1 25c 5197 PHONES 5198 CENTRAL DRUG 1204 Main Street COLUMBIA Special Rates LEAVE YOUR LAUNDRY 12 O'CLOCK 1323 Taylor Street Team Tappa Keg Frat Picks Pass-Outs In Flynn Hall Speedy Spears And Tiny Rivers Captain Teams. Harrelson and Thompson Chief Heavers The selection of the yearly all-Caro. Una all-time pass-out team was com* ? pleted in Flynn Hall on March 31 by I Tappa Keg, national sot's fraternity Of the many hundreds of applicants j only 22 men could be chosen. Members of the fraternity and the two ' judges of the campus have stated that names failing to appear on this list will be included on the third and fourth teams. The I Tappa Keg fraternity was founded at the college of Hard Knocks in 1900 and spread throughout the United States and Canada as soon as prohibition was put into effect To become a member of this group an applicant must be able to drink a quart of whiskey and then stagger a flight of stairs. If you're caught on the first bounce it's O. K. O. Included in the list of first and second team men arc students who have done themselves proud in being able to take it. The following is a list of the first and second all-time all-Carolina Pass ' out teams: Firs, Team Second T?m ! Ous I earlman heaver Tracy Sn.UW OMrgc TraT beh,"d Tom Slmnwn? shep Thompson ...fresh out Pet* ? Sp^'l ,gre,80n "l>ettcr half Willie "tl" S n,,Tt v'?ar* (c),WOr8t 1,alf Judge Culler T '? nI draw back *(c) Ti"> K,w" n n ? 8calcs-on ,lis hack Hob W*rrw ? el1 cout'1 ..Stanley Bryant, E?q. Spot Moringo beer(99.9%) boy Frost Walker Judge Blankhead manager Hardroek Smith The most spectacular play of the game will probably be a heave, 50 yards, from Anion Harelson to Shep I hompson, the latter being experienced in this line. A large crowd is not expected to attend the annual classick, according to the leading bootleggers of the country. with their studies?usually performed while seated. The I STORRS-SCHAEFER I i Stylist { I * H. Grady Kinsland * Who will conduct, a Special Showing of I Spring and Summer j FABRICS I April 4th, 6th and 6th I | Your inspection is cordially invited. ^^^mHNSON I LAUNDRY I To Students r AT THE CANTEEN BY EACH DAY Telephone 4954