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Studes Strive To Strangle Stifling Aims Petition Plan Protection Banisters Would Ban Shotgun Sales Within Limits Of City's Reaches A petition is now being circulated on the campus to request the city council of Columbia to ban the sale of shotguns within the city limits. The petition is being circulated by the members of the law school who are unanimously behind the measure, student leaders have promised full cooperation. Full credit is being given The Gamecock, campus weekly, for the part it has played in the movement by printing each week a list of marriages of students and alumni. Bill Douglas in a statement yesterday stated that the situation was becoming serious and that upstanding students need protection from the Columbia fathers. Billy Wetmore, another prominent law student, said that he had gone out for track but with the development of high powered shells he was finding his training of 110 protection. Wetmorc's engagement, was announced recently but as yet the name of his fiancee has not been published. It will be announced by the first father to draw a sight 011 him. In the m^an time the Richland county delegation has amended the county game laws to provide a year round open season on law students. No license will be required but adequate reasons must be given by those scoring direct hits. Johnny Scott, Ilarold Funderburke, and Reese Williams arc the committee in charge of the petition. The petition reads as follows: . Whereas: Boys will be boys, and Whereas: Girls are the same, thank Gawd, and Whereas: The same to you, Nellie, Therefore: We solemnly go on record as favoring davenports. WilliardWinsWhen Garlic Gets Going The glaring, unshaded light beat down 011 the dirty little room. Five men sat in terse silence, their eyes gued on the perspiring fact of a man alone in one corner. Ilis lips parted: the five became rigid. "Garlic," the lone figure spoke "Garlic." And so the five Gamecock reporters rushed off to write the story how Henry Willard won the Southern conference boxing championship. tt. m. o. Night, stillness, storm, the two cars passed like Jack Giles going after the story of the Second Coming. The Most Elaborate Showing! The Most Complete Stock! THE MOST SENSATIONAL VALUES IN MEN'S easter suits Single and Double Breasted Models Belted Back Sport Models THE SOUTH'S GREATEST BUYS AT $12.50 & $15 Every Suit Guaranteed to give Satisfactory Service! WorthmorE Clothes Shop, Inc. 1425 Main st. Columbia, S. C. .x V WANTED! By Marshall Cantey A Job Preening pigs or any other kind of lofty labor. He is very tired of loafing and believes idleness} a curse. Blank Head Is Charged With Felony (CONTINUED FROM PAQE ONE) was in no condition to give an explanation of his conduct but the theory was advanced by the authorities that he had been enticed into a game of chance by some of the vicious elements on the campus and had lost his shirt and then some. Early this morning a movement was initiated by Troy Stokes to get old clothes for "Judge" and such has been the enthusiastic response that he has already received contributions of six decks of cards and a pair of loaded dice. It is rumored that Stokes intends to drop out of school and set himself in business. o. m. a. Fair Nominee Has Running Mental Lapse (CONTINUED FROM PAGE ONE) "What's that terrible odor?" they demanded. "Not mush," Jimmie Lou explained. At that moment a swarm of Pie Flies flew in. "Aw, I'm stung," cried Jimmie Lou, bursting into tears. "But you better be good, or I won't let you be my maid of honor. You couldn't be anyway, I don't reckon." "One more crack like that outa you and I'll bash your mug in," muttered Mush, thru clenched teeth. "You better watch out anyway, the forces of law and order and hot on you trail." "Not hot," sneered one of the Pie Flies, "just Lukewarm." "You're just a Tooly in the hands of politicians, anyway," added another. "Ha ha," snickered one of Jimmie Lou's pals, "You're a nice one to say thatl Remember another Troy got burned, and he'd still Stoking; the home fires." That crack seemed enflame the wrath of the Pie Flies. Buzzing angrily, they descended in a swarm on the heads of the Dishup damsels, who were soon very much in distress. Four persons were killed in the fray, all of them Pie Flies. Altho several of Dishup's cohorts were injured, all survive. They can take it! The dead are the following: Margaret (Ha^d Hittin') Naydon, Kleanor (Stranger) McFall, Katherine (Kill Em) Pendlcy, Cornelia (Splutter) Beamer, the last to succumb, putting up a brave fight. Among those who are now in jail, awaiting their trial are the following: Nanette Shannond, Lois Twistbull, Meulee Hide, Coy Milette, Miriam Slander, and Carolyn Podges. u. m. a. Three Go a-Hunting But Cockleburs Win (CONTINUED FROM PAOE ONE) ______ i husky gulps he proceeded to shoot a'i cocleburs, thinking they were robins. To prove that he had actually been a-Hunting he brought back a sackful of the burs to the mess hall to be served for his supper. Friends await eagerly the outcome of the concentrated Hunting that the trio is carrying on with such ferver. XT. 8. O. A Stvell Model Dean Irene Dourlard demonstrates proper posture to assume when inveighing an audience to go to sleep. Mastodi Professor Gorilla Merrywether (Happy for a hoist. Brief Pause For I jKe 11 ) ML l| j This is a view of the recently completed ii by the Y. M. C. A. Special badges will bi seances. A bare peep, of course, costs muc to students suffering from heart trouble. A donkey stood in the desert Juri And Brawnely Brayed? difTici: Under the sun I tossed the dice? bigani I won and how I neighed! . (Ed. Note?This is fee verse and can be bought at all grocery stores at rni $ 1 a cartload.) (W< This, gentle reader, is an example of win fad in Germany) did to one poor little helplea that this is really a sad case. CONTENTED COWS Bang! Bang! And another injun bit the dust! # "Wal, I guess that fixetf him," remarked John Carrion, famous lost student and member of the A. T. Bores. "You shore did, pardner," replied Frank Ward-lawless, equally dumb, "and now let's ramble over to the cow-barn." "Yeh, I reckon as how them cows need a little attention." Jiang 1 Bang! And another injun bit the dust! "Pardner, I reckon as how they'll be glad to sec us. We ain't bin over for at least five minutes." And so they walked over to the cow-barn. They rang the cow bell and soon one of the cows came to the door, wearing an Indian blanket'. Bang! Bang! And another injun bit the dust! v. m. a. AN O. D. K. SERENADE Alpha Kappa Gamma Gamma Listen to this chapel Drahma Solemn, sad, three maids appear Service rendered none will swear. Mary Fiddle major tone lapped for service quite unknown, That's the riddle, mystery, Why this Mary's tapped in solemnity. Liza thrice an office held, That's the reason she's called "Swell" Office holding proved courageous, Gamma took her it's contagious. Susie Biddlc bided time, Waited nine months it will rime, One year gone she took her chance Rescuing gals at a rowdy dance. Gamma took 'em, crowned by moss, Evergreen, 'Twas service gross, Alpha Kappa Gamma Gamma, That's the end of this Drahma. Wild Terror Grips Wild Yellow Crew (CONTINUED FROM I'AOE ONE) :limbed on top of the bookcase. He had already carved a name for himself when ic escaped from Winthrop in the disguise of a boy, carrying a suitcase which ic had carved out all by himself. Now, le pulled out his trusty pocket knife, lulled off one of his wooden legs, and :arvcd himself a pair of field glasses, all n the twinkling of an eye. Focussing on the monster, he made the imazing discovery that the lion was a nere dog, tawny in color. With a smile ?f triumph he announced his discovery, ind immediately every reporter in the oom crowded on to the bookcase. They \ Dr. L. L. Toole DENTIST > 1316 Main Street i" WE'LL C YOUR Bi ?take it ho bring it b ! Here is a simple time-saving suggestion that will eliminate a lot of unnecessary trouble and worry for you. Send all your baggage, trunks and personal belongings home by Railway Express. Wherever you may live, if it is within regular vehicle limits, Railway Express will call for your trunks and bags and speed them away on fast passenger trains through to destination. You'll be surprised how easy it is and how quickly your trunks will be home. Thousands of fellows?boys and girls, too?have found Railway SERVING THE NAT RAIL EXPI AGEN< NATION-W Mjvii T, pay n?ror lnia xg yue S. S. Class Under Spell Of Stompkins Judge Speaks Harshly Innocents Inveigled Into Unimaginable Action By Unprincipaled Instructor Haled into court on a charge of perverting the youth of Columbia by teaching his Sunday school class how to blow smoke rings, Benny Stompkins vehemently denied the charges. What, teach my little dears to do such . a degrading thing? The very idea! Judge, I'm ashamed of you. You should think only pure, clean thoughts. You come to my Sunday school class and I'll demonstrate." The judge refused the invitation and sentenced Stompkins to three months imprisonment. Interviewed in his cold grey cell by a reporter from the Yellow Sheet, Stompkins issued the following statement: "I think it's an awful shame," he gasped between sobs. "Here 1 go trying to do something for other people, and what do I get for it?" Beating his brow with his clenched fist, Stompkins took another drink from the flask he held in his hand. "I didn't do nothin' wrong," he exclaimed. "AH 1 done was to show 'em how to play dice. They already know how to play poker. And here they accuse me of teaching the little dears to blow smoke rings." The jailors say Stompkins is usually well behaved, except when lie starts biting the furniture. This habit they attribute to his stay at the University of South Carolina. xj. a. o. all nodded assent, but were still nonplussed because they could not decide what to do with the dog. As they all shrunk away from the animal, the bookcase toppled, and this saved the day, for the regular staff, fearing that a politician had gotten loose, stormed the office, analyzed the situation, and called the dogcatcher. THE R. L. BRYAN CO. "The House of Quality" Books, Stationery, Student Supplies 1440 Main St. Columbia, S. C. FREEMAN SPORT SHOES $4?$5 and $6 SPORT PANTS $1.95 to $3.95 JESSAMINE SUITS $35 with 2 pants COPELAND GO. 1409 Main St. iOLLECT &GGAGE >me...and ack again Express service an economy not to be sneezed at. Then, after the holidays, send your baggage back the same way and Railway Express will handle it swiftly, safely and promptly direct to your fraternity house or other residence. Railway Express has served your Alma Mater for many years. It provides fast, dependable service everywhere. For rates and all necessary labels, merely telephone the local Railway Express office. ION FOR 94 YEARS .WAY I RESS :Y, Inc. IDE SERVICE . 'it . i mic * b? Atmospheje) takes Dr. Ferrul Relaxation "v:-vi:: v.; ! 1 BHi( . V-V---I ! i H^n < i a 1 I < ! a r i i i ridoor Nudist Colony, sponsored e issued to those who care for h less but is not recommended ist comments that it is always lit to convict a pretty woman for iy. Why not try her for fradu.ise of the males??The Dallas ing News. e really wouldn't bore you) C " : ji m sdra at Mass Hall Diet (a forgotten ;s chap. We believe, dear reader, .*u_