The gamecock. (Columbia, S.C.) 1908-2006, November 12, 1929, Page PAGE SEVEN, Image 10
Morsels
s= J
My waste-basket is running over,
and my desk is piled high with heartrending
letters from lovesick swains
asking me the secret of my power
over the, female of the species. For
instance.
"Dear Morsels:
"I have tried listerine, danderine,
unguentine, vaseline, and oleomargarine,
learned to speak French and
play the piano, taken courses in Katined
Kulture and dynamic speaking,
and done everything I cm to arouse
the untold latent powers lying dormant
within me, but the girls don't
fall for me a tall. I rehearse what
I am going to say for hours and
hours, and they laugh in my face. I
have finally arrived at the conclusion
that my 'it' is undeveloped. Won't
you tell me how to develop it?
"Forlorn One."
ANSWER: Dear Forlorn One:
You have the same trouble that
troubles nine men out of every ten,
and as there is one born every minute
you can see how much trouble there
is in the world.
You have plenty of "it." The reason
you can't win the maiden of your
heart's desire is that your methods
arc wrong. If you lay your heart at
a girl's feet she will step on it, and
telling her you love her with all your
heart and mind and soul won't make
her love you.
The four walls and ceiling of my
office are completely covered with
letters and photographs of former
sweethearts. The secret of my success
lies in my method of attack. This
is all there is to it: First attract her
attention with romantic love stuff,
then arouse her interest by playing
the indifferent suitor, and finally, cap
the climax with the strong, silent
caveman act. Then ask her to marry
you, and she'll say, "most assuredly."
Yours sincerely,
Morsels.
If you have any soul problems,
secret sorrows, or affaires de coeur
which need straightening out, just
take your pen in hand and spill inky
tears 011 Morsels' shoulder. There,
little girl, don't cry.
u.s.o.
Sigma Phi Epsilon
(Continued From Page 1)
of S. P. E. brings its number of active
chapters to 62.
Joseph Hiott, James Harvey, Lloyd
Hiott, Wilmot Jacobs, "Red" Adams,
William Garrison, Forest Keels, Sylvan
Hand, George Meetze, M. D.
Whiteside, Henry Peinkie, Waldie
Bushaw and Nigel League were initiated
as active members. Alumni also
taken in included: Dr. Louis Taylor,
of the Good Shepherd Episcopal
Church; Dr. Eugene Powell, pathologist
of the Baptist Hospital; Edward
Ircy, connected with the South Carolina
branch of General Motors, and
Maurice Mattcson, Director of Music
at the University.
OLD GRADS GATHER
FOR ANNUAL AFFAIR
(Continued from Page 1)
that stadium, I have a check ready for
$1,000." This brought loud applause
from the banqueters, and indicated the
enthusiasm on the stadium issue.
Barney A. Earley, executive secretary
of the association, talked briefly
conccrning the lack of members in the
Alumni Association, and charged
those present to return to their communities
with the intention of persuading
other alumni of the University
to join.
He said that several hundred new
members to the association, probably
increasing their number to 1,000 instead
of the present enrollment of
450, would make their work clearer
and would relieve the present condition
of only a few controlling it as a
private enterprise.
Mayor Thomas B. Stoney, next
speaker, paid a tribute to the work of
Mr. Earley, and, in his bombastic
style colored with his Charlcstonian
accents, uttered a few well-taken remarks.
"The University should attempt to
sell the idea of a college education to
the high school students of the State,"
he said, "not only by means of show
ing theni how to side-step an opponent
out 011 the gridiron, but also by
giving them something that will help
them to side-step the bill collectors
after they have finished their college
education."
J. Rion McKissick, dean of the
School of Journalism of the University,
spoke briefly of the work that is
being done by the Alumni Association,
lie also praised the diligence of Mr.
Earley in his work.
Julius Mclnness of Raleigh, N. C.,
expressed the desire to sec South Carolina
advertise herself as North Carolina
has, saying "North Carolina is the
most self-advertised school in the
world."
Senator Jeffries of Walterboro,
spoke concerning the lack of interest
among the alumni of the appropria- 1
tions made to the University by the
Mate.
William L. Glover, Orangeburg
banker, became toastmaster when
President Timmerman left the luncheon
to escort Governor Richards to ,
the football game. '
Av the close of the meeting and 1
luncheon a picture of the group of
alumni, approximately 100, was taken \
?"n t stcPs ?f ^e gymnasium. It
will be used in the Garnet and Black, ,
University Annual. 1
Then the men were ushered to a 1
section of the stands at the North ,
Carohna-South Carolina game, where ,
they sadly looked on at the Game- .
cocks succumb to an overpowering !
fiSt" S?r"\ I Heelia. It was the (
t defeat that the homecoming
alumni have witnessed in the three '
years that such contests have been '
played. :
There were approximately 1,500 !
alumni in the stands, other than the
ASr belo,ng,n? to the association.
After the game and its chilling and .
disheartening effects had partly sub- !
sided, when the former South Carol','1*
C?i1!egl1an1s YCre in a bettcr mood, J
?h?\? * d th,e evening concert of ,
he Marine Band and later a dance at !
the Ridgewood Country Club. ,
U.S. o.
. Drunk (bumping into lamp post):
Excuse me, (bumping into hydrant):
bxcusc me, little boy," (bumping I
into second lamp post and falling
down), "Well, rn just sit here until
the crowd passes."
Frances Ponder?I simply hate i
gym. J '
Miss Gilbert?You shouldn't hate .
Jim, nes the only boy around here.
CAROLINA
Why don't more of you take c
ship? We trained the World's fi
on request.
BOWEN-CONNATSER B1
L Corner Sumter and Lady
... on t
.in 3
"Hi
frill:
and
A
one
the i
"1
? 1929, Lioorrr A Mnn Tobacco Cq .
FACULTY HANDS
OUT DECISION co
I~
(Continued From Page 1)
ations, and that they agree further
to spread this constitution 011 the
ninutes of each society and to deliver
1 copy to the dean of the University
or permanent custody."
For your information I quote the
ollowing cxcerpt from the report of
)ur committee:
This committee will not undertake
0 pass upon the questions of constiutional
law raised oy the petitioners
ind by the respondents. The fact that
the system of rotation has been in
operation for several years is in itself
strong presumptive evidence of the
adoption of the Constitution of 1925,
yet the absence of the usual formal
ecord of its ratification in the minutes
3f the societies is sufficient to create
reasonable doubt as to its validity. If
the committee should attempt to find
ind sift all the facts concerning this
:ontroversy and to plod patiently
through all the multitudinous anfractuosities
and labyrinthine circumplications
of the constitutional points raised
its labors might be but half begun
when the present Carolinian editor's
term is done."
Yours sincerely,
J. Rion McKissick,
Chairman, Faculty Committee on Student
Publications.
U.B.O.
Manager?I advise you to let the
villain shoot himself instead of taking
poison.
Author of New Play?Really? Why
do you suggest that?
It'll wake the audience up.
STUDENTS
>ur special course in Pennmanrst
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