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idekick Cramps Style When Sheik Shows Stars to Sheba HE SURE WUZ ZEIGFIELD light Have Learnt Some Holds From Rudy-But Practice Makes Perfect We (I and the sidekick) shore did i in a bunch of Spring fever trouble th one of these here high-school-week is. Now as a matter of fact on rec d wuzn't they a coupla goodiooking hebas in that crowd. Well is wuz like this; I got woke up ther morning by sumpin n'other or bbee it wuz just from force of habit. lays tiere a long time lookin' at the dekick. Hd's still toppin ninety. We'd n out on a little party the night be re and he seemed to be reaping a d harvest. I lays there admiring bhy girls leave home and wondering if I could ever acquire any of his techni ;c with the frail sex. Pretty soon tho I gits tired of lookin' t him and decides to git up. I goes ver to our port hole to take a slant at e cock-eyed world and also to see if theys any fair frails doin' their stuff our promenade. Well, I looks all 'rotEd and the trees is green, the spar rows is chattering, and that dang-busted 8:30 bell is clattering. Just about the time the 8:30 bell quits doin' its stuff I happen to glat.ce over the wall, and there she was; just like as per specification , and delivered in schedule time. She with about three other pint size chicks wuz comio' up from the coop. I lets loose a warhot p what brings the sidekick out of the fog on the double-quick. He takes oee bok and then says. "Meet the Missus. Thats the gal I been lookin' for twenty years." "Go bite a fat hog or else git a run ning start and jump in the creek cause your liver shore ain't functioning pro perlf' says I sweetly. \Vell 'bout the time she gits in direct iine with our fresh air and sunshine source she pipes up with a sweet smile. "Hello there Mark Tony !" "Hi there Cleopatria, how d'ya leave the Nile" says I real friendly like and just 'bout that time she passed out of sight behind the wall. The sidekick gits off a couple of dirty Irish digs 'bout me flirting in my Pyja mas etc. But then lie's just the side kick and I don't mind what he says. Thats just his way of getting rid of his excess cxergy. Sometime tho I may lose my jwrspicuity and sock him in his twat when he gits to kiddin' me like that. As I wuz goin' to my 8:30 'bout nine o'clock I meets- the same little jane crossing the campus. I halts the parade and decides to git a little "Lowdown" on the situation. I separates her from the flock and she totes me off to the local "Slot) Joint" to git a cooling dIrink of the elixir of life. Namely H20. Course I didn't mind pluttin' out a jittle on the lady perv'idinl' it wuzn't to much. The main object on hand wuIz to git a line on 'her close up. Nowv Hozos I'll tell the blue-flunked Cockeyed-eyed word she wuz a knock Alit. From the tips of her little sport shoes to the crown of her goldcai head she wuz Ziefield, deep tink;y blue eye that just sortta madle ya fill up when ya looked in 'enm, a little row of Pearls covgredt with a perfect rosebud of a mouth, skin that wouldl shame a lity, and( all top)'Ied off with a mass (of filny go;den strands that glorified the name of hair. Now I realizedl it wuz my dluty to show tile little ladly arounid 'cause I re memberedl that wve wuz ask'ed 'specially to see that the visiting frails had a good time. Now mei bein1' a chIron'e resplecter (If dulty I forgot all about myl 8 :30. Along towvard 9 :30 tho I remembers that since I is only got about cuts inl nearly everything I dlecides I bletter git to my 9:30 class. So I dates her tip for the atfternioon and night and hauls my freight off to class. Well that afternoon we struts our Inarbaige . Course she (didn't have to strut hers 'cause is strutedl itself. WVhen ' Sot calls time on us I reind(s hler of the (late' to be filled later. 'That night I pokes (town to the coopI to take her for a waik since my finan cliinch. Nowv I know that par) (of her tech.. Ilinile was bor in her andl 'art of it STAR NETMEN BEATTIE COLEMAN -USC CAROLINA FOLK WORK IN MANY OPERA SCENES AUDIENCE WAS UNAWARE Students Forget Play Just to Watch Class Mates Smoke Cigarettes Students always knew that someone tron Carolina would achieve fame some day. It seemed a long time coming al>ot out whent it did happen it happened all in a bunch. Remember all the excitement about grand opera last week; anyway if one is a high brow t went at least once and sat in the "Carolina Top Box," and ii he is a low brow he probably heard the other fellows tasking about it. Maybe the audieice didn't know that more than half the actors (?) on that stage were Carolina students, but the writer had inside dope pnd knows who they were. The management insisted that this fact not be made known to the general public while the opera was still going on, in the fear that the theatre would be crowded to an over-capacity by Carolina students loyal in their ef forts to cheer their classmates on to even greater heights of fame. It has been fully investigated, but there seems to be no way of discerning how these students rose to such g,ory overnight, nor how, when, and where they made their Jirst appearance. They have certainly kept it dark so far and sprang it as a bomb to most of the student body. It is hoped at least that no one was shocked when the Carolina co-eds walk ed on the stage puffing lazily and fami liarly at cigarette stubs. It is proved that they made a hit when we quote one persons reply uuon being asked about the music, "well, I was so busy watch ing the Carolina students I forgot to listen to the music." They certainly knew where their most applreciative audience was seated becauise they kept looking upi and tip ah, through the per formance. Some good actors do "play tom the gallery" anywvay. Thel girls taking p)art wvere: Misses B lainche Folsomi, Ruth Langfelder, Ethel A,.ii Mlture, Inez \Vooten, Virginia .\leSwan, liva Joe Lockman, Thelma l.ockman, andi( llen Chaplin. The men were: Marion Long. J. L. Carpenter, WV. G,. Reid, Claude Carp)enter, Olin TIrues datle, and J;ack James ces is in a dilapidated condition and U D)riv- Its don't credit. We strolls for a spell and fvially ends up on the knoll near D)avis college. We ain't been there imore'tn a c'oupille litt le whies fore I see shet kmnows her sttuff. I coi uldn't faze her. She heat me to nearly ev'ery Ruddy' do his stuff ont the Silver sheet, hut also hart of it was PtRACTICE. 'Hotit the teiith time we come up for atir I heard voices approaching from 'rountd the corner. It wvuz the sidekick mud the judge strolling aroutnd togather. I interduces them to each othier and is beginning to change our loc'at ivi when the side kick says p)len-y loud (0nuff for her to hear. "Your wife wants yoti on the phlone'." Aggravating catfish ! No4' wutzn't that a dirty trick to hav'e puiled on me? Tlhe little pulse disturber takes one good look at tme and bceis a traveling con versation with the sidekick. As they moved off the sidlekick throws batck over bis shoulder. "HuItrry upl T left the receiver downi, Florida Booming Away As Usual Says an - Old Gamecock SARASOTA IS THE PLACE Four Fourths of Georgia is in Florida Says Ted Lewis Sarasota, Fla. April, 15, 1926. Editor of The Gamecock: As it so happens, I am forced to ad mit that I don't know just who I am addressing, nevertheless, some two or three bells (very dumb) sent me a short note a few days previous, asking that I send a line or so to you concerning "The land of flowers" as I see it. Guess when these lads get a peep at this, if such ever comes to pass, they will give me the merry razz laff, but that's very we--as Mabel said, "I've walked home before." To me, Florida is just about every thing a person could expect to find where mortals dwell. It is the only state that offers an assortment of glorious oppor tunities to everybody. 'Tis quite true that I haven't traveled very much, but somehow, since I've been down here, I don't seem to care much about seeing the rest of what have you. I am now situated in (what we think) about the livest little city in the state, namely-Sarasota on the Gulf. Sarasota is said to be Florida's most beautiful city. It has baimy breezes from the Gulf of Mexico. mixed with welcome zephyrs from picturesque Sarasota Bay. All told, Sarasota is the place we've all read about, dreamed about, and wyi dered where on earth such a place could be. The slogan here is "Spend a sum mer next winter in Sarasota." Of course you all are aware that Florida is nationally famous as the win ter piay ground of the nation. The fact, together with statistics that four fourths of the population of Georgia, and nine-tenths of the population of the other states (of course, causally speak ing-more or less) are now in Florida, would lead one to believe that there is no room for any others to get in. Well, you are all wrong, things are just get ting in shape so that Florida can take care of her company. The only thing is, that when people come in as "com prany." sometimes they do as I did, and stay for keeps. This past season Fve seen so-cai led celebraties from all c('r ners of the land. I've had oodles of Iileasure-a little of this, and a little of that-a bit of hither and a hit of th:th er-in other words; when in the lacod of sinishine and flowers, act the part. They started taking a census of the number of real estate gents in Florida, and the adding machine broke down sonic where up in the billions. They're allright, however. The climate here is wonderful. It gives one an enormous appetite, and since I think of it, I think that it im puroves the laadies' tremendously. If vou dlon't agree with me just dIrop down and have a few dinner dlates-some more broken add(i.ng machines. Really tho, the climate has been ideal, not too hot or too cool the whole wvinter thru-just right. All of these things, the beautiful eter nai ssunshine. the alwvays flowers, the perfect climate, the taste of nature at her best, have led to the most marvel ons growth and development of any one sta*c that the world has ever heard of Yet the development of Florida is not onue hit more wonderful to me, than the state itself. T wish that all of you could come dowvn and he my guests for a while. WVe could have plenty of every thing, and lots of good times.. then get LIn 0n Sunmday morning andl heat it for Sunday school. Miiss thle Carolina life, and all that sort of thing, studylinig ( ?), etc., and I wish for the wvhole flock of you, the highest awards for yotr studiotus labor. F'lor,(da may heC the stuff, hut give mt first, last, and alwvays, Sotuth Carolina 's C'AROLTNA. Best of spirits. Tedl Lewis A college professor had twvo razors. a big one and a little one. One day when he was shaving he called to his small son. "Tohnny, this big ra7or is dul11. go get the baby razor." Tohnny wvent to the foot of the stens "Ma" he ce,r "Pa wants y." 'Weinie Roast' Given By Scarabean Club A huge bortfire, "hot dogs" roasting, laughter, fun, and delicious sandwiches, all go to make up a perfect moonlight picnic, and all of this could be found at the Scarabeans picnic at Goodwill last Monday evenijng. About 25 people enjoyed the outing. ''hey left town Monday afternoon, and went out in cars. Cold weather caused swimming to be taboo, but boating was enjoyed. Men of C Time1 Don't be the last m to discard your ol, have to buy a Straw GET IT NOW ? THE STRAWT SEASON ARE Don't count on havingur : wearing it again. It will look son's hat. The new hats have sligltly different--AND P y Mpefe--u se<omf Cv Dok'to see the last NA m are wdnserdlyou oihti haea< o that ahr islttle SENNI STRA4W! DPnetScoun Lnn ha u u Lvainn sits wgi. ill on,k sours ray. Whe reht hafei shuk and cute the newes1IR ar wonerfmdit coounders iner heany of thatee is lite i llwih off.lain eaue POrewhrunk Linenm menckeaits died-rt lyos rnappy. Smar orineri cruastwit vonrh newe whiprh isr psingme turt. OtAlso p lin of sumolrs $1.00 n olr to 2.00 |Mimnaugh's For Sun-Kist Drinks -'VISIT HAMPTON'S FRUIT DRINK Home-Made Candies 1218 Main St. Columbia, S. C Only Place of Its Kind in the City -/ ii it.T // arolina! Hat s Here an on the campus d felt hat - you'll anyway - why not HA TS THIS )IFFFRENT. ast season's hat cleaned and just what it is-a last sea wider brims, the crows are CTICALLY AAL HAVE ad gay as yuik-sober if r, solidl color. MA SWF,AT BANDS which weight, and conform to the dlanger of your new hat S---$3.50 to $5.00 56 and $7.00 suits $10 to $15.00 e Suits $15.00 c>w almost any day. Have g a p>ure ILinen Suit, pre lines as low as $10. You to the best of satisfaction. ite Cloth wvill be a favorite. 'ine strip)es of blue or black Shirts $1.95 lEnglish Br oa d clo thI Shirts in neckhand or collar attached stylies --- the fanmous 1(c lipse brand, famlous for looks and(l wear. Full rainge of sizes. Each $1.95 Men's Shop