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FEATURE STO] Page the Meat Market They Have Heavy Line of Bull CO-ED RECEIVES A SHOCK Couldn't Understand Order For 10 Pounds of Beef-Soon Found Out "Hello l" "Who is this?" "8511, who are you," "Listen, can you send me out about ten pounds of steak right away," "Steak-Why 'er, we haven't any steak. Evidently you have the wrong-" "Bu't isn't this 8511?" "Yes, Woman's Dormitory, University of South Carolina, what do you want?" "Steak I" 'We haven't any." "Well you should have for you handle such a good 'line' and shoot so much 'bull' you should have a carload. Good bye I" "Well, I'll be-" exclaimed the exas perated co-ed as she slammed the re ceiver on the hook. - U.s.c. - WAYS DEVISED FOR TRIP BA CK FROM FURMAN OLD GAME USED AGAIN Many Hiding Places Used-One Burrows Under Football Baggage To Escape Conductor That necessity is the mother of inven tion was amply revealed during the re turn trip from Greenville last Saturday night. The great game of "Dodge the Conductor" was devised for the occasion, and worked with success. Besides the contestants the "bleacherites" entered into the spirit of the contest and con tributed to victory. Some of those gentlemen who "bum med" their way up to see the game Sat urday decided to return home by train. Their intentions, however were thwarted by.the impossibility of securing a reduced fare for the return trip of the special train. In most cases the necessary money was not available and, in others, it was intended for other uses. The result was the invention of the game. It was ru mored that certain members of the fac ulty took more than a passive interest in the matter. The most used of the subterfuges was the hiding on the steps of the car while the innocent fellow students stood about and obstructed the view. After the con ductor passes the car, the hoboes were "paid up" for the trip. Unfortunately, there was a limited number of car steps. One of the stu dents failing to find a hiding place bur row.ed under the football baggage. By some strange accident, this completely covered him and he made the grade. Among those students who had retrrn tickets, there were several hardy souls who bequeathed the precious slip of paper and shifted for themselves. At the con clusion of the conductor's round, the entire crowd gathered together in their seats and gave three.silent cheers for the Southern 'Railway. CAMPUS Omtario Song Little streams of whiskey, 1ittle bits of rum, Put our probibition Rather on the bum. Senior: How do you like my room, as a whole ? Frosh: As a hole it's fine, but as a room-not so good. -Aggievator. My Co-E~d Curled is her hair as an airdale's coat. And black as printer's ink. hier eyes are brown as oozy mud or Oysters fried, I think. hier lips are red as a baby's toe, Her voice is as soft as mush. l'hat is the coed with whoni I go, On whom I have a crush. -Center Colonel. UES OF UNIVE] CLIPPINGS THE BOOK WORM In a recent conversation a member of the faculty expressed the opinion that the bookworm was the real student and intimated that the salvation of the American higher educational system de pended on this particular type of under graduate. It seems well without attempt ing to take issue with the man who made this statement to try to record a few of the observations made by any one who has been around the species for a num ber of years and thus to afford a cry stalizing agent for student opinion on the incurably studious collegian. A bookworm will generally be found to fall in one of two classes. The first class is represented by the type usually visualized when the term is ap,plied to a person. He is the man who wears the horn rimmed spectacles, who holds his head backward and to the side, and who when attacked or accosted will throw up an outer defense consisting for the most part of pure verbage. He goes to his classes and from them to his study, this series of events being a good rep -esentation of his daily routine. He loes not know who Knute Rockne is or does he know the coach of the local eleven. In fact he does not bother him -elf with any of the frivolities of life, and does not care to contaminate himseli by associating with roughnecks, to bor row his own system of reasoning. But fortunately for the human race there is another type of bookworm. This man is the person to whom people go when they are n trouble. He can not be distinguished from his fellow students for he is ond of them. He knows the contents of the best works of literature and art but he knows in addition the things which the average man knows and usually he has a little better ac quaintance with them, for he is in the habit of examining everything to its furtherest depths. He is also willing to use this kinow ledge for the benefit of those with whom he comes in contact. And here is an other point. This man establishes con tacts, much to his own good and to that of those with whom they are established. Much of our modern philosophy and our present day ideals of social inter course depends on the individual's ad ding something to the sum total of the life of society. This is beautiful theory but it depends on the individual's having something within himself to give. The only way that he can acconplish this end is to develop himself to the fullest of his capacities, and diligent study is the best way to effect this development. However, the student who shuts himself up in his own world, perhaps a world made up of his own thoughts, is not ad vancing. If this type of man is the ideal bookworm, then let us be delivered from him. The other type is highly de sirable and to the extent that the mani qt:oted in the first part of this editorial means this kind of student, we agree with him.-The High Hat. COMICS These Co-Ed Vamps "Cheer up, old man, there are lots of other fish in the sea." "Yes, but the last one took my bait." Departing Dude: Well, so long, old timer. Hope you have a nice time at Niagara. I'll look for you in the fall. Contributor: Whats' the matter with my jokes? Editor: They're fine except for one little thing. Contributor : 'Whats' that? Editor: They're not funny. -Red Cat. Don't forbid your (late Fat imas and such, If you let 'em smoke They dlon't talk so miuch. --Wabash Caveman. ISITY CAMPUS May Be Down But Not Wholly Out in Love ALAS THE FALLEN JUNIOR Sight of "the Fairest" With Ano ther Causes Sad Scene at Dormitory Men have risen and men have fallen, but alas I who would have thought that he w'ould have so easily gone down before the innocent, sweet smiles of one of our equally sweet co eds. Gone beyond all hope we fear, is the fate of one of our juniors who has gone "sheiking" once too much. Known as a ladies man, but thought of as one that would not fall is this new worshipper at the throne of Ven ,us. His record of not having a single date his freshman year was broken last year when he was a sophomore, but it was for him to entirely turn his attention to members of the fair sex only lately. Effect of the Strain In fact it has come to such a state, this change of his, that he, can easily be seen chasing some of our vener able professors' chickens, mistaking them for the other kind. This shows that the gentleman is actually driven to the point of desperation by these so-called innocent smiles of his fair lady. Last Sunday night at the domitory it really became known how bad he was "gone", when the love-sick stud ent, hearing that "his co-ed" had a date with a friend could not bear the pain. and being sorely touched by the wily darts of cupid went down to see if dame Rumor was merely jesting. Rumor Proves True The rumor was not wrong, and when the junior arrived a classmate had his heart's desire in an apparently happy state of mind, but not for long. Hopelessly he went over and stood gazing at tthe pair with eyes filled with various emotions, but showing mainly those f;lled his thought of "HER" Hopelessly he pleaded, but in vain, and failing in his efforts to displace the more fortunate junior from his lady's side the lights went out. During such a suspicious time he refused to leave, but threw himself down at the foot of the queen, there to lie as a guardian and fallen lover. The lights came on, and crestfallen he arose to wander blindly to the door assisted by two of his fellow students, who understood. But such is life, and so goes a woman's heart. Sending her lover away under such trying circumstances, only to walk arm in arm across tthe campus broadly smiling next day. A lesson may be gained from this, and well might it pay more men to take notice. Moral :--Don't fall too hard. - u.s.c. -- GAMECOCK THANKS EDITOR OF STATE Trhe editor of the Gamecock wishes to thank Mr. Latimer of the State for the use of the bulletin board on Main Street the evening of the Carolia-Woi ford game. It is the austom of theState to place upon their board onily the newvs bulletins originating in their office, but they kindly gave permission to 'place the whole story of the game as it appeared in the Gamecock wvhere it would be read by the football fans of the city. Quite a crowd congregated to read the full details of the scrap as the story was some ten hours ahead of any other paper. In allowing us this privilege the State again exhibited the courtesy it has always extended the Gamecock. Crowson Printing Company Dependable Printing PHONE 4109 907 MAIN For Sun-Kist Drinks -VISIT -. HAMPTON'S FRUIT DRINK Home-Made Candies Only Place. of Its Kind in the City 1218 Main St. Columbia, S. C. CAPITOL CAFE Your Patronage Appreciated Food of Best Quality-Excellent Service 1210 Main St. Columbia, S. C. "The House of Quality" Established in 1844 THE R. L. BRYAN COMPANY Books, Stationery. Printing, Bind ing, Office Furniture & Specialties Columbia, South Carolina Smart lothes Fourfold Youthfulness WE do much more than put Youth into our style - models. We put Youth into our weaves and our pat terns and our colors, too. And-hand tailor ing by Stein-Bloch keeps the clothes look ing young up to old age. COGGINS & JOHNSON EJI.Al the youthful novel ties, but no doubtful oddi ties, in pull-over jackets. Patrionize Our Advertisers They Patrionize U. Y.M.C.A BARBER SHOP EXCELLENT, WORK REASONABLE PRICES L. M. MCCARTY, Prop. Your Patronage Appreciated CAROLINA STUDENTS I A Good Place to Eat MRS. F. F. BELL 1012 Marion Street One-Half Block From Campus This Is To Invite You to The Rose Mary 1218 Washington Street Breakfast-Seven-thirty to Ten Lunch-Twelve to Four Dinner and Supper-Five to Eight-thirty Every Delicacy of the Season A Warm Welcome Always SANITA-RY C AFE 1345 Main Street SAVOY CAFE KNOWN FOR QUALITY Open Day and Night Polite Attention 1327 Main St. Columbia, S. C. SYLVAN BROS. Jewelers and Diamond Merchzants Class Rings and Pins Always in, Stock or Gladly Made Up 1500 Main St. Columbia, S. C. Wing field's Drug Store 1443 Main Street