The gamecock. (Columbia, S.C.) 1908-2006, April 01, 1922, YALLER SHEET, Page 2, Image 2
rrn 6aentaotI
PUBLISHED WEEKLY BY THE
EUPHRADIAN AND CLARO
SOPHIC SOCIETIES, UNI
VERSITY OF SOUTH CARO
LINA.
Subscription $1.50 per Year.
Entered at Columbia, S. C., postoffice
November 20, 1908, as second
class mail matter.
Columbia, S. C. April 1, 1922.
1)r. (irrell ... . Edit or-in-Clhief
)r. I,eslie Wells.....Associate
Prof Snowden ........ Atilet'ics
Prof. Alveriwet ler . . . . Society
D)r. Carpent er ......Wigwai
.\Mr. Keiled............1 oke
Prof. Cook...... lUndertaking
I)ea llIa ker . . . . . . . .Local Law
. lr. Il ugginus.........\ lnager~
P. K. Smith. Advice to ,ovelorn
Prof. Tabler. . . . . lleauty ilints
Ain'.i '(,l] to gtithis gang14
to wvork?
This is our first af tempt, at
editinig the (bnecock and hope
next. year to get, olt. a bettel
edition.
Writing this paper was one
of the IIost; lugrubrious, npre
vedetied jobs 1 have ever as
suined Inlder the dIIress of im
fpeling iicicumstances.
--W.T 8. C.
Trials of a President
As it becomes Ily du ty to
write an article for our. worthy
puiblicationi, I have decided to
prodlce a brief sketch uipon
the trials of a college president.
When I was elected to the
presidency of this institution,
I felt that I was the recept,or. of
a most tu.pemildouls honlor; and
I looked forward eagerly and
with a naxiliiml of deliglt to
the rosy visiols of the easy life
of a college president. But
alas' for my drealls and. golden
fanies! Since I becaile the
chief executive of an ilstitl
tion of learning my life has
beenl a weary one; tle Imt hIway
has beenl rough and fill of trials
and tribulations. )ay inI and
day out, i1ontlih after Ionllth,
year' atfter' year thle troubles
have coment and gone onily to
have their places taken by
otheiors oif a la rger caIlire.
For' th lp ast year' or so al
most nimy1 nt.ire timel( every'( day
is consumed iln reading peti
t ions amiil retsoluitionis froml lie
stol entI body. A I first I refus
ed( to read so mlanly of t hemi, and
refused to gran lt numerous'01 re
quellsts5; but I I so11on disco)verl'tO
that. thlis pln wvoiubl not w~ork,
bec(a use~ as soonl as the stioent s
learnIed t hatI their requPO lest s had
beenm refuisedl, t hey would( all
turn "R adical"' at once, decl'are
a strike, amll hoist tIle "'reod
flag'' of revyouitioni.
Another great problemi withI
which a college presidentI has
to wr'esthe is that of exculsinig
stinilnta in torg "hIomo " IRerni
larly every Friday there is a <de
Ige of sti lents uiponl lily office,
who flaunt telegrams and let
ters unler imy very nose, an
demand that, they be granted
freedlom for the rest of the
week. As in t he other case, at.
first. I refused to gralt such
free<oll), but tie riesult was a.
hollibardillent of scathing let,
ters ad m ilessages froiml irate
parents, denli ing the reasons
for imy not allowing their
"<dlh-ling boy" to visit, his par
entlal doimicile and giving Ime to
ulnerstal in no gentle terms
fliat 1 did lnot "own" their sons.
F'roi this I learned that tie
lNost ad%isable pilan would he
to allmw one ul all to depart
unhidered, if necessary.
Fiurthermore there is always
trouble with the faculty. Some
professor is forever an( etern
ally complai Ii ng about, the lack
()f chalk, or the( temulperatuire of
lhe class roomii; the high grades
of somiie stud]eIts S(IIi to give
hwiri instructors muich worry,
while the low grades of others
seem1i coqual ly as irri Iating. Am(I
(very mIiember ()f Ile entire fac
11lty nuist, bring is tale of woe
to Ime for set lement. I wish
some of theiim were at least able
to take care of their own
a fa irns.
'Then there are many minor
troubles in the everyday life of
ti college; either someone has
applroplriated'( a plihnograpIh
record fromi Fl inn lall or a
bad cheek has been passed onl
the valteeln; solle(iies its a
st'lient tryig to beat his board
bill, or roomli ill I steam111-heated
buibNling ithiout payin for- it.
All thIs(e8 little things go to
Iake thlie life of a college pres
ident a veritable trial.
, in (loisinig, let Ile say that
if y of Iiiy readers are offered
Ihe position of president of a
(o1l11, d )o not ncept, it, be
cause, take it. fromi lle, the job
is cert ainly Iot what is cracked
upI to be.
Inventions and Schemes by the
Faculty
Prof. Keith has m1velted a
new kind of a pen for correet
ing students' French exercises.
It spIIrngles (lt into five
Prongs like a chickenl's foot,
each prong with a. pen-poillt on
it. ly dipnI g this new in
st riuiinent ill red ink lhe cani
oine-fifthI thle timie required by
lie oirdlinairy pen'i.
IProf. C arsoni has thle plaun
d1rawnu for hiis new Monkey
I liiing .Alachin,e. When'1 put
into p ractice it, will opleraite as5
follow~s:
oni ai stool(on isi biiSack, withI the
milk pail Isitting oni his stomi
ach1. The14 COW, fromi which it
is del(si redo to4 ' xtrcth m il1' 11k,
will t hn be4 brought (on the
scenei( am10 lalcedl over the mloni
key. NoIw t his litt1'lelst has1
fe(et like handls, so0 lie cani ulse
thiemi also. While I miilkinJg wi thl
hamis4 and1( feet, his tail ma~y lie
losy~ ('ither(' ho(ldling the cow's
tinil to keen it fromi swi t.h ig,
or lie may lovingly cares her
with it to keep her quiet. This
i. a great time saver and should
prove a success. Prof. Mercer
has been ment to Africa to pur
vitase monkeys to supplemllent
those ill hlis classes.
Dr. Lipscomb, the chemical
marvel, has discovered i mneth
od for making corn whiskey
without getting caught. le re
fuses to publish his method but
those interested iln this matter
can get 8amples of his product
at the laboratory at $3.00 a
quart.
Dr. Pat Wardlaw has1 lad(e
for himself an autonatic heard
twister anld puller which will
enable himl) hereafter to give
hi.s entire attention to his class.
The Iowa Scale Mfg. ('o. hIas
mllade to order for Dr. Y. Snow
den a pair of computing scales.
When an11 examination paper is
placed on the scales, the weight
of the per aInld the grade to
be given is slown oln the dial.
Dr. Snowden mays that, this
should be a great help to him,
for the ol tyle of scales which
he has beel using gave only the
weights of the papers, ald it
reqilired considerable figurinlg
to get the grade from the
weight.
FACULTY AND STUDENTS
ARE NOT CO-OPERATING
Professors Express Opinions on
New Phone System
The hearty co-operation be
hvwen students and professors
shoul at all tiilex he proiloted.
It is to be regretted that the
fi-ulty is very lax sometilles
anld show extreimle negligence
in the performance of their
(du1ty ill thi respect. One case
might be cited iln pollit. 'he
other night a few serious llinld
(A students took it upon then
,elves to do a little research
work. They seriously doubted
the wisdomll of the telepliole
company iln forcing a new and
comnipIicated systelli upoln the
u1nellighltelled people of Co
lum11bia and they desired to in
vest igate the uatter from vari
011 viewpoits. So ardent al
enIthusliastic were these young
stud(enits that they forgot t;haat
the hour was ap)proachinkg 2 A.
MI., hut this was an inisigifi
canitt i temi anyway and1( the pr'o
fessors should1( not hlave object
e'd. It wvas this rudfe objection
wvhic s o miuch dlamperedl the
spirits of the young inlvestiga
tors. Th le fi rst professor inter
viewved was Pro)fesor Siowden
miarked ind(ifferenc(e ando even
host.iIifty towvardl the effortsx of
the struigg lig younig studoenits.
Buit ilk spi.fe (of hiis attitilde the
q luest-ionier persistedh.
"D)o you think the ne(w sys
temi w~ould work in Charles
toll?" lhe was asked1, anid "What
are your views on it fromi an
hiist orical stand1(point?"
P rofessor Snow.len PmlIeIU
*etorte<, "What jackass is it
-allin ig up at. this time of night?
1o to bed.''
I )isappointed but bY nio
Imeans ready to give up1) they
,ried Profexxor Baker who was
iked to discuss thei new sys
en front an elicational stami
poinlt. EV(I1 the Dean of the
University failed to p4ay the
proper amoiit. of vourtesy and
[he stiudelIt left himiil to try
Irofexxor AlcCuitcheon. It wam
ill the dial systeini coul do to
Lvake Professor Mc-Cutcheoln
bit at lat ie leepily uiswer
d. IHe was one of t he few who
was gentInallma en1oulglh to pre
4ent his view.s at somle length
1nd he aiply satisfied the In
ves. t iga t ors, declaring that Ie
bielievedl from an oeconoicial
<tandpoin Ot ve system wva-s
1 xiuccess.
It. is unine(essarv (o o into
Ill he (etails Iere. Most. aII
>)f t he professors were coisil t
'd it they seemled to think
they were insultetd. 1)r. Cur
ell was amked if Ie thoigIlt the
he new system.
Profoessor. Keith though.1t Ohe
iiew mYstemii wou work better
in the daytime.
So for th141se and many other
rSealons wv think that-, the fac
tlty is not co-opera t ilg to
lheir fulkest, vxt-eni. 'Th'im im a
<erious charge agains.t I liei and
we hope flha. in) Ile fut'uren they
will be iore ready andI(1 willing
to lend their aid andI(] advice at
111 t lwiex to students in their
p)uIrsuit of knowledge.
A DAY AT THE LAW SCHOOL
Chapl ell I: Bing hong ding
-nerrily roll ve scholars to
voildvr class rooml-hin. hong
ling.
Prof. IPriermonl :I r. Bryson,
Studen ts (in chorus) :Yes,
4ir; yes, sir; yeS, sir
Prof. Frierson: I ideel genl
1eii-n, it, is a pleasure to notice
hat only 29 lil are mick Chim
110rningl1. 'ThP lmac i.1
iicking u1p. Now to work the
irst case for this
lI(ddlie ( anitw el: Dr)i. Frier
IOn, I waniht to ask you1 a quie
[ion
St,udents (en mnasse) : Din
.le dinigle dingle!
P rof. F'rierson: (lentlemnen,
i ve you r ea rniet and4 xi ncere,
M~r. Cantwell who lund(oubtedly
has a serioluN problemi for us
I his maorining.
IMl((Jie the ( ireat: Pr'ofexxor,
if aI man1 ownls an1 initellIigen t
bull and1( another 11mn1 says that
hie owns it andh
ProI~f. Friier'son: Nowv Mr.
1anit welIl pleaise lhe explici t.
Ou0i say owns11 it. WVhat does
hie own i, the tail, thle heioN4 or the
fee-yo must lhe suire t,o say
wVhat yo11uimean ini the legal
phraseology of the lawv.
Eddie Cantwell: Yes, sir,
that's it, well he owns every
thing about the bull as sie
staids in the fields and
41eorge Taylor (measured):
Professor, it appears to me ut- Ci
der the latest decision of Mike v
v. Ike, 23 1. C. 231, that the V
case in not on all fours With -
the present one. In that case
I gather that the court decided
that since the bull was lying
down instead of standing up
the verdict should go to the
plaintiff.
.'rof. Frierson: Quite true,
Mir. Taylor, but you forget that
in that case the defend.ant
owned everything but the cow
bell.
Eddie Cantwell But Pro
fessor I haven't told you my
case yet.
Prof. Frierson: Quite true,
(lite true; go on Mr. Cautwell.
Eddie: As I was saying, one
man411 owNIled a bull anld another
claiied it. One (ay the plainl
tiff took the bull by the horns
and began to lead it to his
stable. 'le defendant who
saw this from the other iside of
the fence jumped over the fence
and grabbed the bull by the tail 1
and began to lead him to his
barn.
(arer: Professor, I don't f
see why the bull didn't kick. I
Prof. Frierson: Gentlemen, I
thiis is indeed a perplexing
que'stion but, really I do not see
where this has any hearing on
the question of negotiable in- a
sIumients. I leave that ques- I
tion of the bull for Mr. Rucker e
to solve in his course on Col- y
stitutional Law. 0
Eddie Cantwell: it Prof. d
Hucker told Imle that it was
under your11 course that we
should discuss tihe bull.
Mrs. Reamer: Mr. Friersoin,
I lon't see how anyone call
fight over a bull. Its absurd.
Eddie Cantwell: I know d
that, professor. I was just mnal
ing 11p the case because today 3
is April Fool.
Chapel Bell: Ring bong a
bunk-bunk. Flow gently ye
students form ye learning-- Il
-bunk--bunk. 10
DID YOU KNOW
M)
That Dr. Carpentier is no re. Ill
hat ion to Georges?
TFhat Warmath .was in the nec
Armiy? pr
I i1
T1ha't R. (l. Bell runs the Y.~
M. C. A.? A
That uniderclassmen wor-*
shippedl at the shine of If.
Brockington ?
TIhait E. M. Smith w1oni the a
St ate Oratorical Contest?
. Su
TJhat there will be no comipul-lut
sory church at tend(ance after u
Junme 1 5th ?01
"That this (Gamnecock wvannle
wrlitteni while we shmould havag<
beeni at churlxch? fo0
That this stafi' left town whte
this issue camn out?