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THE SERJ ECHOES Rich--I feel like a collector of antiques. Green-low's that ? Rich--Buie paid mie fifty cents to day that he has owed me for six months. Prof. Snowden (in "Polit.")-lr. White, what would happen if every body would make hammers? White-Everybody vould be knock ers! Buic (in one of his evening dis courses)--Fools often ask questions wise men can't answer. I guess that's the reason I busted on logic. LOGIC. Ligon "If I got two cents and Billy Perrin's got one cent, and John Lee's got two cents, and I can borrow John's and Billy's money, I'll have enough to get a (lope." A SAM PLE. Graydon, the human graphophone: "The transcendental, Euphuistic, catastrophical element is superabun dantly promulgated over this verdant campus." IF. Ashley: "Freshman, how did you come out on the history exam?" "Fresh" McNair: "Shucks, if I had just known what he asked us, I could have made a hundred." TAKE -rHE DOG! "Liary" Blake: "Yes, sir-ree, I drove from the first tee through a win dow of the new building and the ball hit one of the carpenter's hammers and bounced clean back to me." TALKATIVE. "Little Bo" Marion "My book ?" "Big Bo" Marion: "Yes." "Little 1o": "Where 'bouts?" "Big Bo": "Marshal's office." A PRIZI Is Offered to the the Best College Y of April. The Ye in the Gamecock as The Following Men Will Act as Judges: B. Manning, C. T Oliphant and R. Mi Competitors Will Leave tlf don, 3 E. Legare or A. D, OUS SIDE ANALYSES (With apologies to "G. & B.," '03). The Professors.-All are composed of the same substance; will be benefi cial if taken rightly, but trouble will arise if used wrongly. A large dose during term will be. beneficial on exams. MUath.-The most violent and pois onous substance known. Resembles Latin, in that it explodes loudly. Un less the experimenter knows "what's a fact," lie should not deal with it at all. The effects of this element are most deadly if taken in small and sparing quantities ; the only remedy lies in imbibing large and frequent doses of the vile stuff, so that the end might not come with such startling swiftness. The. symptoms of poison ing are a certain' wildness of counte nance, a fierce, incoherent and con tinuous mumbling about "cosines," "secants," "tangents," etc., and night mares about whirling triangles and i flying pyramids. Latin.-An extremely dangerous substance, and should be approached with extreme care. Frequently ex plodes violently and a great number of casualties often occur, the most noted of which happened on February 6th in which over a score of unfortu nate greenhorns perished. All tyros should shun it with the greatest dili gence. Its appearance is rather ter rifying at the first sight. ChemistrY.-Found in a large, gloomy cavern, and access to it is oftentimes very difficult. Is a most valuable element when used rightly, but often becomes dangerous and ir ritable on the slightest provocation; careful manipulation is necessary when dealing with it. Its usefulness -but this is a digression and not ger main to the subject-so we will pass on. M!iss Caughman.-An undeveloped growth; very rapid in its movements; is said to be fiery and irritable, and dlangerous when rubbed the wrong way. EB. OF $5 Student Originating eli Before the First lls Will Be Printed they are Handed in.' Offer the 'Prize and Coach Dick Reid, .Graydon, A. D. irdaugh. : : : : eir Yells with C. T. Gray Oliphant. 7 We Rutledge FOUR YEARS SHE GREW AND A SHORT DISCUSSION BY THE AUTHOR (To a Co-ed.) Four years she grew in sun and shower, Then students said: "A lovelier flower In class was never known." But papa heard she was to wed A senior with a pea-nut head; So he came and took her home. Feb. 21, 1909, Just After Dinner. The above little poem was written by me while in a perfectly sane and sober state. I began it while sitting on a chicken coo) in my backyard, and concluded it in the same place. I did not anticipate at the time of its writ ing the fame that it has since caused to be showered upon me, or I would not have had it published. I abhor notoriety and publicity, and it was due only to the money that's in it that I reluctantly condescended to write the following brief discussion of my poem. The poem possesses, as all students of English literature will immediately, if not sooner, perceive, many of the ad mirable qualities of the Canterbury Tales, probably the best job Mr. Chauser ever turned out. There will be noticed, however, a decided improve inent in the spelling of my little .poeni over that of the latter. It would ill become ie to knock Mr. Chauser's works, as Mr. Chauser was always fair in his criticisms of my poems, but it is a known fact that Geoffrey was sadly deficient in spelling. And he realized this fact himself, as many are the times he has remarked to me that the regret of his life was his inability to spell correctly. Neverthe less, his Canterbury Tales are rich in gold nuggests of sound thought, and it is in this respect that my poemn is so strikingly similar to his. Now there are some readers who may, as their soul joyously drinks in the elixir of this little poemn, think they feel a little touch of Coleridge. This is not so. While Mr. Coleridge was not averse to touching his friends, in fact is said to have existed entirely by such operations, still, he has been too long deceased to be able to touch any of the readers of this poem, unless, perhaps, the readler be a believer in spiritualism, in which case he ought to be touched. Suffice to say that my poemn contains none of the qualities of Coleridge's, having been written, as above stated, while I was perfectly awvare of wvhat I was doing. .On the other hand, I admit the in fluence of Shakespeare. This is clearly seen in the fifth line, "A senior wvith a p)ea-nut head." This sublime line is found in Shakespeare's "Ten Nights in a Barroom." In addition to Shakespeare, mutch of the classi cism of Milton is in fused into my p)oeml. John wvas exceedingly clever in the handling of the classics, and nobodly has ever been able to go back far enough, or down deep enough, or up high enough to find the little gems of thought lie so skillfully con ceahedh about his poems somewvhere. H-owvever, with the assistance of Mr. R. Egree, a pmeent-rdny spnoiist in the dissection of decayed poems for germs of thoughts (which, when dis covered, he conceals in his own poems), a perfectly lucid line was fer retted out. This I immediately in jected into my poem, thus giving it a classic odor of nymphs, flowers and fish bones. . In addition to all the above, there is one more aspect of nature treated in my poem. This is borrowed from one of the greatest poets that ever thought the world owed him a living. Before disclosing this poet's identity, how ever, I would like to mention that some have been so presumptious as to infer that the theme of my poem was suggested by a romantic little ditty written by a certain Beowulf, now de ceased, but who flourished back in the time vheii men clubbed each other on the head for a living. The little ditty referred to depicts the childish pranks of one Grendel, a monster of the bogs, who devoured a hall full of men every evening for supper. Concerning this I wish to state that I am unable to see how such a conclusion could be reached by anyone, as the senior in my poem bears no resemblance what ever to the monster described in Beo wulf's poem. Now, as to the Nature Poet from whom I borrowed the main 'theme of my poem, it gives ime pleasure to re call to your mind Mr. Win. Words worth, who, back in 1799, wrote a lit tle poem entitled "Three Years She Grew." It is from this that I derived the theme of my poem; yea, the theme, the music, the cadence, the rhythm, all were born of this soulfull little mas terpiece. And I feel sure that, were Mr. Wordsworth living today, he would shake me by the hand, pat me on the shoulder, and say, "My boy, I feel honored. Lend me a quarter." And thus the world -goes on. One poet, solemncholly over the absence of something to eat in the house, be comies--. Editor's Note: This famous piece was unfortunately left unfinished by the author. Like all geniuses lie had his eccentricities. Once interrupted while in the act of composing an essay he would never take up the same essay again; his train of thought once broken he could never hitch it to gether again. The slightest, most in significant incidents were sufficient to snap in two his delicate trend of thought. In - this instance, a friend, charitably inclined, asked the author out to have an egg sandwich. It is due to this act that we have only a precious fragment of what otherwise wvould have been the greatest master ieice in all English literature. F. R. A Few New Yells -- in a high chair ! Who put her tup there? Ma! Pa! Sis! Boom! Bahi! Carolina'! Carolina I Rahi Rahi I Rahi Strawberry shortcake; Gooseberry p)ie! V-I-C-T-O-R-Y Are we in it, wvell I guess, Carolina 1 Carolina!i Yes ! *Yes I Yes ! 1-2-3-4 3-2-1-4 Who the H-- are wve for? South Carolina I