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. ~ ~ ' WDfNSBORO, S. C^WEDNESDAY, MAY 28, 1884. ~ = ... , * - - -- * 'w/'iJi i- ^ ? ? '. / j i j A Translation. . , ? : V ; > J Z ' My lamp hath burned out, drop by drops. alone: < 8?y fire's Jsst ember falls with dying: sound; ! Without a friend, adosr, to hear me moan, [ weep abandoned in the night profound. \ 8 Behind me?if I would but turn ray head, B Sure J should see it?stands a phantom here; Dread guest who came when my life's feast ' was spread? / . Spectre arrayed in ranks of vanished cheer. K ! My dream lies deed: how bcjng it back in truth? For Time escapes me, and the impostor Prido - i- Conducts to nothingness my days of j'outh, ?- Even:as a flock whereof he was the gruide. f Like to the flood of some unfruitful deep, Over my corpto aslumber in tho tomb .i I feel e on now tho world's oblivion creep, j Which, yet alivc/hath lapped mo half in j / t cold Bight! O.the.nijjhi dolorous I ?' -My hand upon my breast atrembie bounds; . 'Who knocks inside my hollow bosom thus? . - , . . What are those ominous beats, those muffled . sounds? 1 - x F . -f . >> I ?\v,; | . [ r- ? : - ."Whofart tisoa?art thou? Speak, thou tameless I ? thing > A voice cries??^w?ee'faJat "who passioning'? * i -=\ u **I am tbv heart, and j have never loved i * r" ? ?tfrom the Frgpeii ot Louis uouiicec. ? *? * L ?wiw??? y i? ' ,;x NOT SO NOW. The . . streaming ciweffuUy across tiie . kit-., eiiea floor; the fire in . the cooking- ; ssove snapped and crackled, and the j kettle sung merrily when Mr. Selden j i ,; came in from "the barn wflh. the' brim-; I * ming miik-paiL X i * - * - --M %r J4-V? a Kwaf ! - '. OQiUUIi 5UUM7U iiuui vuv W4tv* .; ' doze that had momentarily overcome ! her, even while the last ragged sCock- j ing, polled over the dry gourd tobe.i . darned, was held in one hand, and the j ii?"^ * ' darning-needle in the other. *- . \ " "Asleep?eh?" said the farmer dryly. ^ don't have the time to take naps in P the daytime!" v Vlam sorry," said ?Irs. Selden, col-, . g cfcing.- :"Bnfc I drcg^>jo4F^t>efere-I *faevr ifc^ w^The washagwasvWy hteasgre r. this morning, and 1 got over-tire^, I unmuwA1' . , ' - f * ' r~5?Sk is always heavy,said Mr. ~j Selden gloomily." "Supper ain't ready vet, and. the hired man is waitin' out mthe shed,- and yon are sittin* here ! asleep. Get ont the' cold pork and " beans as quick as yon can! Game-once lost can never' be found again- Every J ? - - / ? mmate counts w mim w via.. Mrs. Selden put aside the stoctang. basket, and made all the haste" s&e < ; - could. ;in*.a nervous and uncertain way; and 'just then the aoor "opened, and a - tall handsome young man entered, with a cluster of dark-green mistletoe ' ~ Ba'his hand. ' ' * * 5 I " "See what I found in the woods, said r he. "You used to Hke mistlefoe, Fanf ay, when you "It's very pretty," said Mrs. Selden, f | '. - . . - with a quick sidelong glance at it, for i. ' jfier husband's eye t is upon her, and * " / /she felt its coid scrutiny. * "Put it c>n the window-sill, Carlos. I am too busy to. look at it just now. Supper is | "And is that any reason that you should hurry yourself to death?" retorted her brother, as he took the heavy iron kettle fromi^' haail. "You will ~kill yourself with these ponderous 4-Humph!" remarked Mr. Selden. ? "You don't seem to bo in any hurry, T-nriTirr I. " "Why should I be?" said Carlos Dorr ... carelessly, as he flung .himself into a ;r seat by the window. "You've been all day tramping about ;\thc woods," said Selden, 4<and you've j fetched home a bunch o' mistletoe!" > "Yet I have not been unoccupied," -'-??idCarlos quietly.; "" : ^ /< : shouldn't make much, profit at the - yeas** end," said his brother-in-law /. " griwiy, "if I worked in that sort of Vvcay. . Come, Fanny, make haste, the ^suil is jioway and the chores are all to. . Ibe done yet. And I don't want to be { Itdisyi^eahle, Dorr," yjth a Minister . 'iisrUnce., "liaJS if you mean' t<5 stay' on v \o3M tUfeiwa.ii longer, I shall expect j*ou ' to ketp Ajaound the placc a littieL" > : | ' " 4 " "^rr took his scat composedly at" the *, * behind his sister,] whose feint ? -rled painfully as dthg. looked t ' ^-cmf V& ^ the other of the speakers. tpstayoB^eB^'^ . ' SeldenT^^^nT^as^ ^ Sloane made you * a good offer Deacon j s^sc - s r work Iiis farm oa 8u. r I R ' you'll accept that?" nincr?? aid "And there's a fair look-out jjoar Wf~ join that lead-mining business at V B5U," added Selden. a '' ""Neither do* I intend to become . lead miner," said Carlos, as unruffled as ever. j 0 "And Dutton Mill can be leased for f a song?a capital place for trade," per- 1 sisted Selden: , "Thanks," Dorr indifferently an- ] swered. "But I don't think I should : shine as a miiier." "Humph!" growled Selden, as he carved the cola pork into slices of por- , ?; . teutons thickness, and served out solid ma?ses of baked beans with them- "I see you don't want to work, that's "Tjfcstlxthe matter with you."v ^ - "Don't, John," said Mrs. Selden ap- ' pealingly. t /A/jJkM, - * ^ ^ "It ain't my duty to encourage idleaoss^-V persisted Selden, drinking off his'tear scalding draughts. "Here's >. Hannah now," as a blooming girl, suf- J ri ; < ficiently like him in features to declare j their relationship as brother and sister, ' but not at all resembling him in expression, came in. "She seems to think, because she teaches district .'j l. schocir that.she.can sit with her hands folded the rest of the day instead o1 t gettin' a rag-carpet under way, or be a sensible patch work auiit, such ! i -ae my mother used to make." ? ; f) . ; {. y-Hannah Selden sat down to the table. -' -i v Vv^Tm sorry I was late," said she. "I. . L meant to help Fanny get tea. But the: ^Shakesperean Club was a little longer *" tthan usuaL." We finished 'Henry "the * ?-T*^- 1.1. r- :_ ? ? CUlUkUj >uiu nry tho Fourth!'M contempt-1 ttouslyiepeated.her brother. "What I * sort o* use is that teash goin' to be to m you?" "Nothing, I suppose," said Hannah. ) & "Except that I like it!" HL . > "Likin' doa't help earn a livia\" j . ; said Selden shortly, while the hired j V ' mac, eating stolidly away at his end of j g3&?Hg|P the table, stared first- at one, then at i n .... Another of the disputants, vaguelyjion- ; ^MBr - " scions that there was mental electricity i in the air. "As for hclpin\ Fanny ; * J ? ~ SVio TC dHn to do I WT~ COH t zieeu. itv iic-iy. ,? ^LL."?_LSer own.work?and I don't want no .nonsense put into her head about being \ a fine lady, witfcuserves and neuralgia, t': and all that sort of thing. ' Well! B , Where was I? Oh, abont Carlos Dorr. - * '-1- He's my wile's brother, and I'm willin' P' " c. td treat himi decent, but I can't have no idlers about here. I'm speaking ?for hiaowa good.'.' . i; "Thwik you, sir," said Carlos. ?; _ my household," went on Selden, *'^Pfio^irrwated than ever," 4*them as K. can't work saa'nt sat." B "Well, I hardlv come under that cat- j egory," said Carlos; *4I can work; but j A it isn't pitching hay and measuring out ? bags of Hour. I must claim the privilege of choosing my own profession, and?excuse me, Mr. Selden?of man-, aging my own busines.s" "Mighty independent, to bo sure," growled the former;;"but I wash my hands of you once fojrall!' And I want you to understand that arter to-morrow your room will be wanted for them as 18 willing 10 wors. lor tumr nvi.ii . "You are welcome to it to-night, Mr. Selden," said Carlos Dorr calmly; "after what you have said you can hardly" aspect j'mo; to ^remain here longer. 1 will* go to'the Parsonage, where Mr. Mildmay will, I make no ' doubt, receive me as a guest." And he walked out of the room. "Oh, John! oh, John!" cried the poor little wife, wringing her thin hands; "and Carlos is the only brother I have left in the world!" - v '"^shiftless cvsgaDona^' roarea seide#; *^vho .turns up? his'"nose at them as could i>uy him up half-a-dozen times." "John, you shall not speak so?" said Hannah quickly., "Mr. l)orr is no vagabond! And;he noverr-^-" # "HtC 'ha!,r- 'siifeercd- Snelden.. "So you're in the ring, too, are you? You'ro ??5?vaf the Dorr worshippers!" ' Hannah blushed, but held her ground 1>ravely. 5 t?T V>io rfiST>eet his JL UV/UVi ii*o ? principles," said"she/ "There How! An.cL-1.dpa'Lbelicre. in your theory of /^ork/rUl the time, ?s if life were .all one eternal tread-mill. You've haF- ' rowed yourself down to a mere machine, and you are killing Fanny, and- -= I tMnk it's a shame! Now you know my opinion about it, " and much good may it do you." ; *.f O .%.[ And she went over to kiss and soothe her poor little sister-in-law, who was sobbing piteously^ ,; "I hate scenes," said Selden. "Come, -Timothy" to the hired-man, "let's get . out;ah^3fodder the cattle afore it gets to'be pTfch "dark. *The* women will come to their senses afore we get back!" [* But the next month he heard of the career his wife's brother had chosen | with fresh contempt "An artist?eh? said he. "A poor i forlorn wrctcn, out ac wuows, &uu ; starring in a garret. He needn't come t to me'for help!" , "He will not," said Hannah. "And I forbid any one to speak his j name in my presence," said Selden I sharply. "He s chosen his own; path; ; now let him stick to it. and keep out o' ! mine." * .. It was not long, however before the [ demon called lit Luck be^an to .perse- . | cute John Selden. He feS from a load ; of straw and broke his leg?it healed J i unsatisfactorily, and he fonnd himself j i a prisoner in the house just when the . i in'o mnct; r-Anst.int snner- ! > laiiU iCVjUAi V/V4. iiw J_ ; vision. His wife became ill of malar1 ial fever. The Lead Mining Company i suddenly '^oflapsed with a thousand i dollars of his hard earned money in jits jaws. Tax-bills came remorselessly p^^CSSditors began to press him. i And, for the "first time in ? his thrifty : and methodical life, John Selden found ! himself hopelessly behind in his afi fairs, with not a cent of money for his ! necessary expenditure. . [ * Poor Hannah, who had eluiig faithi fully to them through all their year of j 1 " * vamtJt -siesta reverses, Durst mio xeurs ?u ?*?> s had been compelled to giro up, Iier^ school?and with it her income?to w&it upon -Fannv, -and' to do the house- ! work. ? " *===i ' ? -"What are we to do?" she , saidr de- { spairin^ly to herself, for shflfcwas-too j crood a little nurse to gfive despondency in the sick-rojcgii. "Do!" repeated a cheerfc3?>^^^| "stop crying in the iirsttpMc^^^i^ v j the next," tell me all M A ama wlm ^OQ Q. t^Airf'Ay; :7*$Qr^Vfc'! ;!to ishare your troubles than IC-'havey-f 'Hannah dear." And Carlo3 Dorr, handsome,* travel j bronzed, and smiling, stood before her. ' Hannah's dark,- tearrW-etv "eyes' spaekled* : ^ J \ 4 <-ff she-cried rapturously, minever" was so glad in my life. John and Fanny are in such trouble!" ;? Mfe.that :?ho?-toigl tho whole sad. ^ . ; ?. Test evening shar-came into the room Lghere John JSeldenlJLayon a chintz lounge, and his poor wife was in?"t>&iVy in the opposite corner. |; "It's all right, John,", she said 1 cneenuiiy.. div ^iuu) auu , Squire Mallard's money will be ready j for him to-morrow morning. Don't fret, John. Cheer, up, Fanny. The wheel"of fortune has taken anew tarn-'' "Have yon found a gold mine?' said the farmer incredulously* ~ ; .. "No," said Hannah, 4 'but Carlos ' r v>rrhas'come back. He has succeeded , ^ ndidly in his profession. His picsple. theTTosemite Valley were both 1 iures v. ?..be very grst day of the exhi- j ;olu on v Vnd. "he, says his purse is \ Mtiorf./ x " ^6. And here he' is now. i Fanny spur.. -np? May he come i. ^tered a deep groan of -Tnhn Salden n. " ? contrition. l00k him in the | I am ashamed *o ^ to' face, said he. "I?I ^ ask hi5 pardon!" ">aid: Carlos^ ."The* 4on't .astt. Ms hand.: 1 cheerfully, as he wrung h *?. Qy j ^We.'re all one, family^wcn't wl tr^i at least, we shall be when I am " ried to Hannah here. Look up,-Fan {j -I I am glad to see a little color in" thu I, pale cheek of yours. I believe I am. making more money out of my arti'r than I could have u&ne as a farmer, L f John." * vfet "Forgive mCi" said Seldcn hoarsely. |' "I've made a mistake. I can see if] now. But if Fanny gets better, and 1 i am spared for another, chance, I won't run aground* on the old rocks. Han F nah, I congratulate you. You've done ' wisely.^ And Fanny whispered softly: I c "DearHannah, i hope, you will be] f happier than I have been. But oh, I 1 am so thankful that hope and comfort r havo- come back to us. through my I brother Carlos." i .? ^ * Truly, there is no preceptor liko ex- I perience. The lesson had corno to John j Seldon lato in life, but he hail profited * by it, and Fanny's existence was ^ brighter and easier thereafter. c ? :? c Another Corner Basted- I " 1?3 ( The agent for a New York grocery , house happened into a small establish- t ment in a village in New Hampshire! the other duv, raid, noticing tnut me i grocer had a thumping big stock of ^ codfish on hand, he asked: ' ^^ 1 ')How. did you come to invest so i much in codfish?" _ , *'Well, I kinder liggurcd for a cor- , ncr, you see." , . : , i ** > "How?" "Why, I bought up every pound of ; ' it in town, and the roads aro so bad j that no mors can be got in here for a | month." , ? r._: * 3 ion { * 'Ana. now. nay c you suucuuuuu r t "Busted all to smash," -was. the sorrowful reply. "Just as I got the cor- k ner fixed the only.three families in the town who eat cod-fish went off to Florida to spend the winter!"? Wall Street News. . i Horse Swapping in Georgia. Gentle reader, did you ever visit the horse swapping grounds at the Soring I riding of the Superior Court of &ortE j Georgia? Early Monday morning, and I long before the court convenes you j may behold them coming in on every j kind of an animal?from a $10 horse j (low to a ?2 mule?sua aoout iu o ciock. i the fun commences. The last' one we visited was in an adjoining county, and the first man on the ground was a gentleman named Uncle Dick Statham, who has been in the horse swapping business since he left the cradle. He rode on the ground about 8 o'clock, with a horse worth just $6,' and the others came up to ask after his health and to see what kind of Stock Unclo Pick had to swap on* ? ; "Well, boys; your Uncle jtichard ha$- ; been under the weather for a few days,.; ' but he thought he would eome up arid, seo if you all had any stock thsfcfct * J ?*- ? aa'4%* 'f' 1 f tlifit. J earea suuui. xuu uccuu . mare. She belongs to the ^ldTSdy. VI 1 gave her to Bessy to ride to;inec?fig. She is not for trade unless I couldgct ' a. right smart to boot" ; * <s Jls 1 About: this time Geoige ^tSeJ prince of the brigade, came careering; j over the hill on a $3 nagj and :r6de; < him like he had been born kt the. saddle. He sported a wide' feat* with a pair "of spurs six inches-"loag; < at some of tlic great yictoiHegaT(w>ft3^ I we imagine so, nerer havih^sefliaiifo}'3 pqlepn^.axM? at-ence joine<f the o^dr andrwanted to, know who was -on ;tEe ; lffll that" day* gapping sio kTr13ncle.' Dick at once bantered Green andlhey soon exchanged by Uncle Dick-<giYing. a/pocket 'knife and-a/*drink to /boot" This was jie first 'blood, {but Jiot the-: last by along shot *' ; 9 - '-- '-r- ? ? A young fellow from Walto^ county,.,; who bad his moustache dyed -for'the; ; n^atiinn oamB in. leading a mule-that]' looked like lie had done ^nothing buff peel the bark off samplings around Vstill house for the last three months." This young man had heard .thatit was ' a shrewd dodge among the-educated j swappers to play drunk, .' and. He was playing it to the queen's taste?sJQto3K?sL 1 not long before he had ehartg^jlhis;* mule for a horse worth $?.25^d^e^e. i fifty cents difference. j < Franklin county, at this jtmeture, sent in her delegate in the" shape ^of Johnnie Love, the oldest trader-.tm tne ? ground, and as such claimed some "ne*. ? toriety, and whose word;,about _ the qualities of a $5 horse was- considered i better than anybody's. Hetuid Uncle j Dick Statham met, and after excbang-1 ing a few commonplace Remarks, Mr. j Love, inquired after Uncle -Dick's stock, j and before long they traded by Uncle j Dick.getting $3 and the saddle blank"-et, which was a piece of an old quilt,*; j in the bargain. .: J j By 11 o^jlock everybody was swapping, and, once in a while, drinking. Ail seemed to be in a good humor, and there was no fuss or fighting in - the" crowd. They traded until night put an end to'it, and the swappers retired to their houses and to cainp outside of i the town. They got something to eat j and were ready for business next morning.-. Next day they had trimmed up their mules and curried their horses, and the same seengsjpzere enacted over. TTr\*4rn Thnrsf?^ntaht -Tinfile Dick had m!tdc"eTgfctfceir sr^ss^had $25 in money, three pocket knives,, two bridles, two quarts of ybisky and a liorse worth just about/jas much as the one he brcughi^-~^^nta jOgnstitutioru get well, and cheaper to Kj\JlAJU.Uk J MUViUiJ* - There never was but,one man cured of rheumatism- bylbe aid of the vocabfnlary q? a medical strident. That man ;had sixteen difiOTeHt4dads' of rheuma'tism^ and they were of a character that when the pains came on, would ; compel aman, while delirious, to marry a; widow whose former husband had been a/wristlet peddler. ; i A pJ?Wciai4 whose fame had precedr ^timfb^-ijail^^and two laps, was^ -a ? -?. v A careful analysis. of; the tongue, : lights, panes, sash and' Hver\ dpt&ej f rheumatic individual was taken -under-8 advisement ana then the .patient wag permitted to tell all-he knew about the disease. The physician -gained many valueless points concerning the comfortless ailment which" lie carefully jot,ted down to disclose to any new patient that might require his profession^'services. * * * f The faculty of disclosing secrets to the doctor was great ^He'would mournfully observe to a patient: ' m. [ "Lend me your ear* and a dollar, I make pain go." j I .But what knocked the rheumatism * silly in our friend was the remark. of j the doctor when his patient. told him Vkof tVi ot TlA!Snffftrfid the! pains of the damned. . " -; '.'What, so soon?" . | This remark seemed- to have a peculiar effect on: the patient, as , it turaed his thoughts to the place where fire ahitedates water, and where rheumatism isxi relic of tHe dark ages, and liniment docs not heal up burns with the ex^ditiousness devoutly to be wished K ?Carl Pretzel, inLogansport Chron- j S% / ? ; \ \ <1. f V' ; ' < r> Rmn.nfrir>atfid Press. , , *. features-- of the present j Une oitn. jS'especially satis?nase of 32Pri- -vewspapers are more j actorv.^ The l >ueECG 0f tbe politi- i ree froin the rah \efore.. . Even the j ians than ever i display a robust' tron? party papers ] ndependence. They er* ^ejr own aeasures and leaders ^selves the j* >arty. Indeed they are. the eaters of the organizations. ~ - ^ , >ort The political chief in \ 'ongr9ss s much more influenced by th e ^Fln" ons and wishes of the editors in 7* fork, Boston ' and Chicago than iditors are by his. ' Except in the >f a few obscure^ sheets that live upo.tf nunicipal patronage, the daily papers ^ lo not care for tne views ox ilu v* . Jiat party "boss" orleading statesman, * >ave as a matter of news. Their opinoris and politics are their own. This ' ndependence of the dictation and in- : iuence of professional politicians 1-'1 1\?JC jxtencis to tne vrcesiy press, VYJUAVJ* j largely outgrown its old subserviences . to the dispensers of county patronage, ' and become manly and self-reliant? E. V.~ SmaUcy, in the Manhattan for April. a ?TTo_or*?nrtn incr was ulowed up on Samuel McDaniels\. farm, near Island 1 Shoals, Ga. Tearing, off a tin stopple he found it containing some very good brandy and 'got drank on it. His mother went out to caff him to dinner, and, examining titer ^jug, found in it $9,500 in $5 goid pieces. The money was buried by his grandfather. rr"f -W? ? What Ailed Kim. Down in a town in Alabama 1 found ' a native''with his chair, tipped back un- * der an awning in front of a saloon, hat down on his cars, eyes half closed* and his toes showing lino ugh his boots. y~v? -o-- nAJt woe ?> I VUl lit U-IU UllUtlUl^ ywjf ?T?~ v.. old mule, head down and eyes closed, ^nd the mud of last fall had nofc'been cleaned off his skeleton frame, i was looking'fromifcan to mrlc, trying to see if I could establish a chain of evidence, when the native straightened up and said: "Stranger, ye ain't goia' to - sottlo in this kentry?" . *No.'V. . 's :;, "Powerful glad to. hear it. Let's drink." I declined* ana he took fiftcon cents' te^snd said: "Stranger this is a Powerful bad kentry ^-power/unHid.'' fj ?*'N6 cErtnce fur a poor man?not a .-?akfe'of^eihance. Let's drink., I declined, ana lie tooK ms-usuii?ivau. with a sigft"of satisfaction. said as he returned to;jlif <Sfalr.2 evidence of ^,^t,ihal5t^is the wust ken try on eartkfor'arwlnte; man who honestly, desirea^to-;hrcak^hjs h&ck in' agiysultapiu'saits.;; 1XKi^en goin' dowiuiiU aS-stiddy-asxlock work fur thfcllast twenty' "y^ar.-" Stager, wet-L. your.. - T-replied that-my wh^tle required a and took It straight again.. .. . ; -^Yes/Sir;'' he -?0Zy tts he got his' chindfied c^'v*itl!b:'diirned Soathern nabolfgrinds me on one- side and the ihfernal'nigger on rthe 'other, and.Tm bound to be pulverized." ^?I)oyou farm?*'jrVja*. $olhm' .thai I Ranted .eyefr gfo-vtrefe.^- It's alios .^fcoo much (51 too little" rain, and if I iiise niggers they don't stay." c h.v. >' vTfteu yon speculate?'' ; .. . . o"Mebbo!dft. Mebb& if I; trad^.a mule wutha hundred dollars fer one wutk sixty-yon kin call it speculation.. Sfagi let's licker." ' . ^.XdecHned,. and.i.6 never shed;-*, tear as Ms corn juice; went down. 8tell Von, atodor Aian ham'tsjot no jigfcts /sound . jere,. ana ne ? . uwu CTound Into the dust," he observed as hie'enlargcd thecals in the top erf his hat so that a tuft of hair could stack up through it. "It seems to be a fine country," "Th&'s a'decepti^ni'*? {But you have a nice climate and' can raise most everything.". ' "Then, whatails'me? Why hain't I a Southern nabob? Why | don't I ride a hoss, an' wear good clothes an' hold. an.-offi3?" ?-ii*4BecaiBe^?l answered, determined to lie to him, '-'your wife is probably a very careless manager, while you have never carefully studied the foundation principles of economy." "Stranger!" said he, as he rose up and shook hands at once, "you've hit it plumb centre, and you are the only man who ever has! All the rest of 'cm say it's 'cause I kin do more loafin' and drinkin1 than_any.jnan in 7jEe State of. Alabama. Stranger, "write them worcls down fur me. r II get the "hang of them in about an hour,, an' then Til go home an* gin my fam'ly to understand that they've got" to buckle right down to economy or hunt for other diggins! Let's destroy about three fingers of the juicc."?M. Quad. * Tnrgnen ieft's Eccentric Mother. A PnMrtti nnnn* rvnhlicVioe tl rK?n I ture of the mother of Torgueneifi which is anything but fluttering. It appears -that this lady was proud and vain to the point of folly, ruling her children as despotically as her slaves. She was as proud of her noble descent as of her riches, and after .she became a .widow her arrogance knew no bounds; so. that this woman, who was anything by nature but foolish, seemed mad. She ordered her. household like to a royal one; her serfs bore the titles of office in use at. court. ' Thus, her postboy was called postmaster-general, ! her steward chief . of the gendarmes,. I and so forth. So otic might speak to her unless- addressed. Not even her sons might appear in hcr presence un-,j ?iTniAnTif^-^iAa.d whet her eldest son ^ch^as-marriediwiLteaB^ber consent, K iw-i' t i Tl "i ^T"V DUO tfMauiOiT j aTdandTetliim suffer Hhe mostcr?^ privations... When, in 1849,. tie cholera broke out In'lierctisfncf sEe.'happened"" to hoar that the infection was spread by means of bacteria that prevaded the' air and were breathed in with -it! She thereupon ordered her, steward of the household to construct for her some contrivance by means of which she could see objects. when going out of doors without breathing the pestilential air.: She therefore caused a kind of sedan chair to be made with a glass' roof, which, Jxad the appearance of one of those chests in "which in," the Greek Church thVfigures of sainte "are bornev abroad. Thus it came about that going out in her machine a jpious person who saw it pass feel on his knees according to cu3tom, crossed himself, and offered the bearers a penny for the good of the church. ?London World. He Always Held a Good Hand. " Two years ago a good-looking young fellow came to the town, and stuck out his shingle as a physician.- Somebody invited him to play, and, jnst for itc? commodation he did so. He won. He played again, and he won. The hands that man used to hold were paralyzing. He was in bad lock*if he didn't have at least an ace fulL One night, after he had been here about three weeks, and was about $2,000 winner, he sat down to a game with some gentlemen, when Col. -?r-. a orominent State official, lounged into the room. Instantly the doctor arose and started for the door. He was ?;one before any one could stop him.' Then tho colonel told what the doctor's little game was, and how he detected him. The doctor's 'hands were very large, and in tho palm of his left hand he kept a bit of sticking plaster. He would slip in three cards, which the sticking plaster kept in piz.ce. The rest was easy enough to an idept The colonel detected him after ao* had been beaten out of several hunirod dollars. ' The doctor suddenly and mysteriously disappeared the next ia^j.?Frankfort Cor. Boston Eercdd. ^ i A story of a fishy nature comes from r\-r,,.nr> Tt. is about a man and a doer. UJrcgw**. . ? There is nothing remarkable about the man exccpt his powers of narration, but the dog possesses varied accomplishments: Among other things he dives into the river and catcheslarge salmon in his mouth. Recently he was by the Side of his master, who was fishing through a hole in. tffeice, when he discovered a choice salftion, and dived down after it The o^frent carried him beyond the hole and under the ice, * trie.* tin SMimO f/t sac ne swaiu. ??? , another hole, whence he scrambled out J with the fish in his mouth.' V Mathematical Prodigies. A mathematical wonder at Falls Village, Ct..is Robert Wilcox, Jr.,aged about 21. Wilcox is a young man of ordinary intelligence, and has a common school education, but in mathematics has developed remarkable ability to add, subtract and- divide mentally. It is said that he is not able to solve complex problems, but m less than a minute can give correct answers to such questions as the following: Given a locomotivc driving wheel 5 feet 4 inches in diameter, how many revolutions would the wheel make in going six miles? Or how many seconds has a man- lived who has attained the age of 37 years 5 months and 3 days, supposing each month to contain thirty days? Kiciimond, IncL, has an untutored mind which is capable of astonishing results in a mathematical way. A boy who will not be six years old until next May, and neither knows his sixes nor I his sevens nor his alphabet, outranks | in. mental arithmetic scholars of .three . tjjnes J^sgeancl weH up in the higher ; branched, r^It is Master George Rowland Price, whose father, M. L. Price, a carpenter, worts for OliVer Yates, and, lite his vsdfe and his other children, has never manifested any rare mental attainment. One morning last fall the boy came ctown stairs ana as ted, "How -much are 2 twice and 1?" His father replied that there was no such thing, Whereupon the lad rejoined: "Yes.there is; 2jfcwice and 1 mate 5." From that on to the holidays he was constantly stumDiing on io sometmng 01 mo &uiu, : which perplexed his parents, as they had token no paiiis to instruct him, and they could not understand where ho got his ideas from. ' With the coming of the holidays, however, his mind became engrossed with more childish things, ana he for -a*' finie abandoned his mathematical problems, but, subsequently resuming them, he has latterly developed into a mental marvel. Perhaps if you ask htm how much forty times eighty are, he will answer: **Two. thousand and twenty sixties, over, " but he generally gives the correct answer r in one total, and does. it apparently with as little thought and as promptly as he would^ell you his name. And . r?rti;To Tio Amc r?rtf. fractions, he computes odd numbers just as readily as he does even ones, whether' the example be in addition, subtraction or multiplication.' A ffellow workman of his father said: "Rowley, I have 41 cents and your father gave 7 and then I give you 9; how many have I left?" ' "Thirty-nine," he replied as quick as a flash, and the man said, "I am 44 years ; old; how many weeks is that?" He just as promptly responded, "2,288." Instead of having a massive head and a dwarfed body as is usual in such individuals, he i3 very evenly proportioned for a boy, weighing about fortyfive pounds, and his extra breadth of forehead would hardly be noticed were one not apprised of his characteristic. In habits he is older than his years, re- . maining with his parents instead of taking to children's sports, and often saying to neighbor children when they "come to play with himf "You had bethnma? mother has enoncrh kids of her own to botherher.'^g In fact,;he is precocious in every -way, but only phenomenal in mathematics. "Why Apprentices Are Scarce. A ' contemporary writer says it is .principally because of the conceit of weak and foolish parents who could not think of allowing their boys to soil their hands with manual labor or tarnish their pedigree by associating with common workmen. Many and many a young man hare I known whoso aptitudes called to him with all the imperious demands , of instinct to learn a trade, but he was prevented from doing en hvhis narente. who ^referred to see i him., filling the. more important and dignified position of clerk, often working fifteon^hours. a day for $15 per month, and sometimes yielding to the I small temptation to leave unpaid his tailor's and -washerwoman's bills. Or if he escapes the . clerkship he was almost sore to b'ciound among the luckless ninety and nine professional men Who ^tancL off and eje with green envy the.ope in the round hundred who has madesuccess.^,, It is not iackrqf attention to the new workman that is lowering the standard in mechanical trades, but "the folly of 4-U*\ <f/vAi*o Af f lift i parents ill buo uwjl0 vi wmv "trSttte? in the face of their sons, and in the absenfct&^f goo& material we get bad. It is ^p^frg-ofgea the case that we get hold of a boy wEo* few or "noqualifications, natural orac^i^ for a trade, bat he can probably make^ more money at that than at common . labor, and, as we can get no better, we have to do the best we can. Therc is no doubt we are getting poorer subjects every year for apprentices for this very reason^ , /iS But we can reach a point sb low that it is impossible to go any lower, and I believe we hayo about reached that point in some lines of bnsines$.: Some parents, and boys too, ate at last getAnarto/I TliflV- ftrfl LiJLUg bUCU VJf VO v^vuvu* amvj *.? v learning that they cannot plant dudes and raise men.'Many bubbles have been pricked,'and much gilding has worn through. Labor is becoming more dignified, because more than ever it is wedded to thought The 'manualtraining schools which are springing up in nearly all of our large cities aro giving instruction to many boys whose parents,'' perhaps, would not at first consent to them entering the shops. These schools are doing a good work in teaching the principles of trades, in fr>a+arin<r ft o-r>nnfnr? fnvfl for mpoh an. " & ics, and in pointing out the way to the special field where the young man can labor with the assurance of receiving his highest reward. With such brightening prospccts as the work of "the 4 manual-training school warrants, we see no reason for fearing that the race of good workmen in any trade will soon die out. On the contrary, we believe we wil1 see mechanics Increasing in numbers and skill from year to year. ?Scientific American. He Had a Plan. A German tailor in a village in Can - - J --11. J _ ada failed a lew days ago ana cauea. a meeting of his creditors. An investigation seemed to show that his liabilities were $4,000 and his assets $1,000. "It thus appears," said one of the creditors, that you can pay *25 cents on the dollar." "Vhell, I doan' figure like dot," replied the tailor. An vrm ficnirfi?" "Viiy, I nays fccfty cents on der dollar." 'How can you do that when your a> sets only allow for one-fourth?'1 4*Vhcli 7 brings the odder money do n from der house.'' He was not permitted to faiL?F<z# Street News. William EL Vaaderbilt - say3. that. about 30,000 people hare already vis1 ited his art gallery. A FAITH CUBE. An Invalid for Thirty-Two Tears Cored by Faith, Prayer and Anointing. On the King's Highway to Boston, over which Washington traveled, just off the main street, in the town of pfon/lo on !inocciiminnp)inns(> ! kJLI iiliUl u., diauvio in which a remarkable cure by faith, prayer and anointing is alleged to have' been effected. Miss Fanny Curtis, about 40 years of age, has for twentythree years been an invalid, and incapable of walking, except a few steps at a time, and while doing so the effort has been accompanicd with extreme paiD. A reporter visited Miss Curtis at her home to learn whether the report of her cure was authentic. She was not inclined to talk on the subject, but said ^ VkAAf) /"** ? <)f. mat suu uiiu jjusiwvci* uccu s.uvu *? the hands of Rev. Arthur J. Sloan, rcctor of Christ church'. She referred the reporter to Mr Sloan, who, she said, was familiar with ail the circumstances. . "Withoutbejrc. persistent," said the r reporter "I woaM jlke' ?>' bear from ; vour own Hps that you knew a'care-has been effected." ..v :f .-;"f 4 'Positive! of .coursc I ajin,1 \ said Miss Curtis. "I Uiiqkv afte?.?wenty-three years of' suffering and. being' unable "to walk out of doors, I "have had an experience that is not' to bei doubted. This change was made instantly, on Friday, March, 7. I had: prayed ear nestly that I might be cured, and with 4 our rector, Mr. Sloan, tad often spoken of the faith cure in which'ho has. been so much interested. Wo 'decided on the date 1 have mentioned* and'each of us-had perfect faith that GodWould lit- * ?rally answer prayer and grant me a relief from my long continued sufferings. He anointed me with oil, and since that moment I have been well,.". "Did you feel any sudden changer" "I cannot say that I did. _ I did not expect any.' I simply knew that I was [ well, and that same night "walked to th^; evening Lenten service at Christ cifarch, a quarter of a mile away.'' ' "/''Have you thoroughly tested your Strength, and are- you not afraid of a relapse?"' ricarf answer th3t question best by stating that on Sunday last I attended < morning .ch'nrcli.service, and Wednesday /evening' agaih^ walked to" the church. As to a relapse; I am confident that so long as I retain my faith my cure will remain permanent"^ "It has been reported'that you^have been confined to your bed during the extended period you mention. Is that a fact?" - "f 1-?^ <U?T ""A lUlVkS iilicuuv vviu jv/u uau walk at times, f rode occasionally in warm weather, but not often." J: The reporter then went to the rec- ' tory, a half mile distant, and found'the Rev. Mr. Sloan at home. . The rector is of commanding figure, though of slight build, and has an eye that is noticablc for its penetration^ . "I wish to gain no notoriety in connection with this cure," he said, "but am perfectly willing to give yon the facts as they are. * IwHl' say first .that faith cures are known to be a fact. Dr. VV/iiiO| Vi W>7wVii) the pioneer of such cures in this country. A large number of remarks ble cures are placed to his: credit, both here and in Germany. The Lord cures disease immediately and without the aid of physicians, at times. Miss Curtis, of whom you inquire, is a parishioner of mine, and I have, in company with my wife, spent much time at her house praying with her and inducing her to believe that she might reach a degree of faith "necessary for a complete cure. Her trouble was of such a nature that it was painful for her to attempt walking, even from one room to another! We dccidcd 011 the urst ittctay in March, and in the afternoon of. that day 3he was instantaneously healed. ; After a prayer I anointed her forehead with oil: jn accordance with St James, v., 14, 15. Besides Miss Curtis and Mrs. Sloan, a' Christian woman .who had previously been healed by Dr. Collis, was in the room. It was purely a matter of faith, and I had no doubt whatever of success. Faith on the * part of the patient, onthe; part of those wha were present, and on the part of myself as the authorized agent, was of course necessary.1 I believed that the * - *. -""'V IT". . Ls I'll* ix>ra wouia xmnu nis promise, uuu clid.'??. ' Do you wish to say that the cure is a permanent one?" asked the reporter. "Those who are healed by faith and prayer are very strongly tested afterward. She is a well .woman now." Her pain may come back as a test, but if so, resistance and prayer that it be removed will prove effectual. The Lord permits this to test the iaith of the sab1 '?New York_Sun. How ToHfcS1" Children- . ? - " . v . CV_ He careiui witn t&e cnnt^-- r~ plain things to ttem.j Do patient if they fail to perform. correctly or just to jour taste. They * are different, a great deal different from you. Everything is new to them. Life is a sort of dream opening out to their innocent, puzzled youog hearts, and brains ; therefore do -notSe surprised if the children are slow, and apparently dull, or if they do not understand everything. Do "not, either, . when you are out of sorts, praise the neighbor's children, or any particularly bright child that you may happen to know. Early impressions are lasting on childhood, and many an honest. little girl and manly boy has felt the young life within them <rrow sour with disgust at the praises of others that are continually dinned into their heads. Ninetenths of the sweet scented dudes and loafers who hang around public places with their hands in their pockets, were smart when they were young; but the dull youngsters always turn out wellsome of them deep and profound scholars, some lawyers, .some merchants, - and others great mechanics. If you will always treat your child as a child, you will be more successful with him. _ ^ I a coiorea individual who went down UU tut; xi^o ab tuu v., Woodward avenue and Congress street j. scrambled up and backed out into the ! street and took a long look towards the j roof of the nearest building. "You j fell from that third-story window!" re- \ marked a pedestrian who had witnessed ' - ? m I the tumble, ".boss, x oeneyes yer; was the prompt reply; "but what puz-; zles me am do queshun of how 1 got up dar1 an1 why I was leajiin' outer do winder!"?Detroit Free Press. A Texas man was left $2,000 by the death of an uncle in New York. He drank deeply and went tlxrough with the property in two months. While engaged in the completion of one of T<v*-ftc railroads he received notice that he had again fallen heir, this time to $5,000. "Allow me to congratulate you, said one of his fellow workmen. 4'Congratulate nothing," said tho man, dismally; "it looks very much as though there was some kind of a plot on foot to kill mo ofE"?Texas Siftings. i . . N Sirs. Leslie's Love Story, i It was nearly three years ago that Mrs. Leslie and the Marquis first met The Marquis de Leuville had come to this country to enlarge the scope of hisliterary and scientific studies. Onexiay while in the city he started out to call L upon a friend- As he was about to as* cend the stoop at his friend's house a carriage dashed up to the same house. "The door fiew open and the pretrtiestlittle foot I'had ever-seen in my. life was placed daintily on the carriage step. And the next instant, the most ? charming little being eyes "ever* restedon sprang out all done up1 in crape," said the Marquis in describing the meeting to a friend. "We; both stood : on the steps a moment before Ihe door, * was opened," he continued, "and I caught a glimpse of .two beautiful eyes almost hidden by a big crape vail. 'I was so infatuated at first sight-that-1 walked up and down the room with the . utmost. impatience- until our mutual friend came down and introduced jis.. -t I really do'nft know . whe'ther . It .waa , 'that 'aj&nfy' H^tl^ &ot r6i* the}*1ar^,'[ dreamy eyes that first cap^atecl mo?1" 'j After their infcrpductioatheF l&riJifei 85 paid the most devoted atteniapn-jto,, Mrs. Leslie, but she was s6 deeply im-.j, mersed in the cares of bugfetess at that t fcirrtn anrJ en ?n<ra*re<i in extri- L eating the enormous business'that hadj^ been left to, her charge from :anT almost i hopeless tangle that she had Halo time^to think of matrimony.* .j , ? ' About a yearago Mrs. lieslic was lying almost at the point of death, and the chivalrous Marquis, hearm'g^ 'of it, hastened to her bedsidbj snd, hy^rr-i cry little attention eoneei-e^le^.-.enr.,;. dfeavored to sooth her- bed' of sickness Still the lady's heart was.not altogethet^on, aftd.it was only wheathe^Mar-\ quis de Lsuvillp came to this .'country for the third time and pressed anetrj; h!s suit "that she' finally consented: become bis wife. - ; v f>*. v Mrs. Frrmk Leslie is one of *4be mcs$ remarkable, women-livings .She posses-^. ses far more business sn^ci^' an3*'iiisi"!: futencss than most men;za$ -'at tie i i same time she'combines "*rith:it.Uiie4iel?: icate refinement which-the' highest culture iLlono can gi?e< Heij literary at-_ i tainments. alone would hare wqa :ipc,J her amendable reputation had she' not ' become reEoxruedforher-bnsiiiessabillty.v '* :; lii ; When Frani Lcsiie^a^abost to -die ho called Mrs. Leslie and said to her: "Go to tity office" and sit at my desfc-until my- dcfcts; an?'*1(S& e paid," The weeding wifegavofiersoi- -j emn promise to the dying m?a .-to.% his wish. That >vas.. live years ago,., ? Immediately after'thc'fnheral she too?' her scat at hcri4nl&,-iiri3fand?? 4placA * and to-day the mammoth publishing '! house that bears his.namp is frco'-trom debt. . . --- ;When they arc'mamcd the Marquis. > and Marquise dc Lcuvilic will reside^in New York and the fair wife of the gal-' lant Chevalier wHl continue to carry" on thB business of Frank Leslie, nub- / Usher, but will devote about one^half as much time to .her desk as she does at present. ; How She Was -Dowered. Both the Packer boys; Rojtaft arid Harry, were treated like equals ' by their fatherland, mother, says the Pittsburg Post In.the little .village where this good old man lived was a. summer hotel, whr*h was patronized considera; bly- during the season, youn? ,J2arry Packer often taking ,his^m'eals: there. ' A voun? ffirl named Lockwood, the daughter of a respectable citizen livingnear the village, cime in to assist waiting on the table. The frequency of Harry Packer's meals at. the hotel attracted some attention, and' his' brother Robert or "Bob,.11 as he was '? familiarly and' affectionately, called by almost ail who ever knew hmv said one. day before the father and Harry at the breakfast table that. Harry was sweet on a little girl down at the ho'tel; and that was the resilon he did not come to i? his meals regularly. Harry {joiqred^ . a; little, and after they had finished* their breakfast the .old Ju3ge seated' ^ ii. X AtTitklC IIUI15C.11 Uil LUC 1 LWU.L yKSl V/ii? TW AH\s?A VIVAlooks Mauch Chunk rmd gives such a magnificent view to the Lehigh Valley, the' movinghoats^nd'i'rainslwlSch Ms own industry had created and brought , tog jther. The old. -gentlemen ^said "Harry, who is this gin Robert rdfers: to?" ' *>*a - "Miss Lockwood, father, the xiaugh- j ter of a man you know very welL. '.'Are you going to majry her,.Harry?" said the Judge! "' "I have some notion of it; father,1" said Harry; ; f ' i .s . *>~ oa !? >j: i "Well, wait till I go down jajid, see .. her,' said the Judge ; and picking up.' his old white hat and cane,'the Judge' anietlv ambled down to the hotel and ' asked for Miss Lockwood. >;She inno-ii cently came. into the office of the hotel, with h.er dining-room apron o? and seated herself beside the Jactee. Just what he said to her, or she to him, will J^grbe exactly known, unices she ; tgiT^t^flj^y^j^^cJudge came out, " he was smilin&jmq^WiB|ffi^ m^i7 well pleased. He wen^Bpi found Harry still seated on' th<TpoWwj where he had ieft. hiin. Fy this. time ' the Judge's face had resumed its-us- : nal crave but kind exDression. ,"WelL i Harry," lie said, "that'is a very nice]; girl down there, but she has no money, i We must raise her some. " \ The old Judge put down his memor- 1 anda for $50,000, the mother -and i others for $25,000 each, and this $J.?0~. 000 was placed in the bank to the j exclusive and immediate credit of'Miss' ; Lockwood ; the engagement - was an- 1 nouncea, the wedding day:, fixed,, the ' marriage took place, and Harry Pack- < er got the girl he liked. . The Poodle and the Whip; ' < " * i , A friend of mine knew of a gent!o- J manwho'iiad a poodle dog possessed of more than oriiinary sagacity, but he ( was under little command.; In order to keep him in better order, the .gentler man purchased a small "whip with 5 which he corrected the do^ once or ] twice during a walk. On his return i the whip was put .on a table in the hall, , and the xcxt morning it was missing, j It was scKtn afterward found conciealcd , in an outbni!dih<r, and again' made use j of in ccrrectin?: the dog. It was,:how- . * ' * - ' t i ' ever,, again iost, out lounu muuua ia j? anoth'cr place. On watching the dog, he was actually seen to take the whip" from the tabic, and run. away'with :it in order again to hide it?Philadelphia ' m .... After all the talk about the transla- ; tion of the Queen's book - it,-is. now"*"; stated that it was written origin ally-in' German, really the language in which < Victoria is most at home. But it was : badly readered into iingiisn. ine book has been well "boomed" on the cyntinent, and the Queen is. now sb 'y. well assured of its successful sale 'that she has consented to permit the-publir . cation of the le tters and memoirs of the Princcss ?Jice in the first week'of ApnL ? ?. ^ ?^ WIT A3fD HUMOR. 1 . v' * i# -MaroageigJ^ the natural lot of aU things terrestriaL:lr.Eyen<-corns hare tc be pared now and again. ' It not every ^woman wfio can travel all over the conntry'on a dollar; but the woman whose .picturc is on that ' - j coin manages to do it . - - TPjL-Carry a'walking stick?" . asked one avenue belle of another. ^ "No,'"'1ras the norfciisiEant response, "but I have a-bea# whicblb just about the same." On an occasionwhenher^grandfather in his haste forgot tS ask t$e blessing, & Dot called out; ' "Whoaf^-whoa! Pap? WXTfSrdTBa^up and' say yoar prsyers*s.?Harper's Bazar. A'Ksmaarck^dmaii sajs she can put her baby to sleep in'-twt>?iriinutes by C: singing "Sweet Violets. "i^The know- '*4:*rS^ ing;jkue-pne probably feigns sleep tc get'her to stop the music. Mtyj ,v ( :-F.< -*i The novftl "Two Kisses" is said tc be faTiag'i "great run. We know of 3 - ; ^ man in this town "who took ''Two < -* ffisses^-lS^ ' ^' imlng :a great ruru The ^nmtt^-"hifebaadis.after him.? ? RocidtmdJfrmiens. ot .:"^^;terribly topi^c!.remarked the woman''witK-SieVbass v^Ice* 4<and 3 <^^^siid^^o&er:da^f Whenever . 'i' Igj&Wnnei ikhiff-tub^ to ask a question; lam'Ihvari&bly' sewered Yes* sSr,' ciir *8o,;eir.**? ,We think, if Shakspeare had lived in Yermop.t hejwuld jiever have written What, a'ml" was'"there, jny counter* meii!1> it "What a .^glgg W&fer'was^e&my '-ooaatrymen!"? . Bttnrngton.FreePr&s. ?;T : '.Do yon paint yet??! ;*sked an?old Tb^~ friend ot a fermniafc artist, whom &B*?^ 'before for many years. \]^? "Tes,V ;WM-ihe?|aos5rort-./<I stall paint Paint tlie children 'red and I put it or witE' mf slipjier.**' v '^Sp'^Iiss Skimps"afid'llr. Iambs are to get? Carried. AV^I^clare! Thai as?d Connie.. Ana^sho-is old enough ^sllls to " "Indeed she is And is for him?wily/ he's old enongb to be her father/' ^axte,"*sa$d: an'exasperated wife, "I wi3JFJJft:,'tras-a? custom, tat Xfofflfen-te^tWdc- husbands as it is foz mdii -^ ira^'^JOTses.^ "Why, my dewS^sBecaas^-Hj it was* Td eheal some.^.wpaan ^dre^allj> before sun* : ul !* t\J '< /!>? .. -, A new, pol ice regulation in 2fo3w2*>^^- forbids "female siiigefs under 21 years p&fornrin^ubfic-peaces of amuse* men^ ":A-. law_relatiiig to ballet-girls might cxclude^all sunder lie age of 85 yearsi. and tciV'iew''npw on the stage wotrfd* have to retire. " " -^SKT pfAA^ friJ-A K?c of/v?lrA *. , ,T* .'..jama mg^./and^cyejT.mcn a man," says an . ;.fc> exchange fiEiTnf ^ThaV' is seventy- ? four iiMSes^'We^Jrmcfa aPmaa11 would make seventy-four men* -This must be . ^Jm| the.same.identical easterner who was a '/host in-Himself." . ' A voluble chromo-peddier, who was Sraggirig^ of his' acquaintance with prominen't men,' this asked if he knew the marquis of; Bute. "The marks of boot?" he;echoed, feelingly. "Well, I. Z-W& KhqyjM tTijn1r"T did." And UO cao disputedJbis:word-" ' 1 - ,mmt - *fWhat ,are. vou .ddine?" asked a *Jg$i boarding-house man of his chum as'he-:J9^H caught Inm'^^tfceing up and down stdrs. 'MI am-gbinr to get married next month,'' was the sole ran reply, 'tand I'm. practicing how.to get in late at night vrithout raising a racl :et" . A Texas pos&iiaster boasts of being a veteran of thxee1 wars, 'but his boasting is no evidenced "his ifcravery. We ^ have a quiet little., jjnaa.-.itp here who ha&^ceBKrfaaxried seven times, and he never mentions it unless Questioned on . > the subject, This, 1% genome heroism. " ' -.; ?iBismarcJc Tribuif^:' "'Tiiat's rot whail'meant," responded the professor. ancient days knewiedgewas confined to a few learned: men, bu$?oow^ys.. almost every * '/.* donkey knows as much as a professor/' The students' looked"at", each other, noddecF; artd'whispered; that's so."? Thxts Sifting^' & ; ;Hei^^iHjurdV.'Wifc is a daughter oi William Lloyd .ftanaspni .and is full of ^ pistck. J5he-wouldn't be a true Garri-~' son il she wasn't. Jfr may also be said jl that the man who captured a wfiole '-M Garrison, alT/byl. himself, cannot be 1 kept down long for theJwant of a few :: - ^ riirtv dollars.?Orleans Picayune. W, . U. S. Senator -FaiSey,^ California, has.a loAg^lRard .f&jfflfeh he is very proud,, and, its natural. ;color not being aocordiag to Ms tastes/'he attempted to improve it byWe ttse'of iodine, with ; a painful Jesuit..; Hekas been ill for sayeralmonths fccro&e effects of poisonous hair dye, aad.:is but the shadow of his formta self.' * Tti; Jtl W fThii>n_nr\ "P.nf ' V XUC lOOIl UUUIKt Ut vuv vnvwyv contains' an alleged: liken ess of Mrs. |i laagtry, K tho.Jiqge .w.erc knocked a l^e Jnrti'er ! one. side, if the chin were more out of plumb; 1f there was a scar on the forehead antf-a piece of the ^ jteffc-esr were -missing, it would be one h | cf the best woodcuts of the late Eliza Pinks tonerer pHbffshwLA witty, physician i^. Paris, being ^kdtoattend a very pretty actress, ? > and looking at ner cnarriage. was the . om^Jj: |3*4Yon are single, are you not, .jflpRear doctor?" she asked. -"''Yes, madam; but <* the doctors "*onl^ "prescribe remedies? they do not -tase xnem/ was^tae ro- . foinder..; RT* "Boy." iie askcd*as. ho stood at the foot of Woodward ayenuc and looking icross "to 'the Can'adiSui'shore, "what is the-depth of water off the dock hero?" rhe boy.looksdAjmvallp over with a sareful eye aiu^then^fSlajyly answered: ' "That's the way it's"aHris been! If a ~v leUow"wants to commit suicide its alius someone so big that his clothes won't besin to fit mel I won't tell you noth- - ^ t in? about ... . . Persons some times'get' answers they lon*t'expect; "even from* children. One -them 'was: questioning a Sundayschool class about, the .man who fell ^ imong thieves.ou-thc way from Jerusalem to Jericho.. Bringing the story to i point, he asked: "Now, why did the % Driest and Levite pass by on the ether " }M side?? A scholar" held out his hand. "Well, my boy, why did the priest pass by cm the other side?" "I know," said the' iajcT: . because the man was already robbed." Mr. Charies Barrett, of Ashburnham, Mass., is 96 years old.- In 1846, when he was 58 years old, he was insured for -M $1,000 in one a the best known life insurance companies. .The policy was lli$ payable at death only, but within a few cKys'MS^iJarrett has received a check from the'eompany for'the full amount of the poifcy together with the dividend tor the,current jearr 0In transmitting ^9 CUaA UIC piWiUWib Ui "^B writes that "Mr.JBarr6tt is the only ^ membcrof that company who has outlived the; mortality table, and that ; there hasjMJt-^een >a similar instance oi longevity in any euwr wmpaajr m. ^