The people. (Barnwell C.H., S.C.) 1877-1884, July 24, 1884, Image 1

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/ ^ Engine* letters and communica- UoB« to be pnblished should be written Mneante sheet*, tad the object of each emrij indicated by necessary note when required. 8. Articles for publication should be written in a clear, legible hand, and on only one side of the page. 4, All changes in advertisements must racb ns on Frisdy. VOL. VII. NO. 47 BARNWELL C. H., S. C., THURSDAY, JULY 24, 1884. 12.00 a Year. irtSJS Ireasof the wrilsi, a guMkatkai, bsri aaa Aidless^ tW fa SUNBISJS AMONG THE HILL'S. ••Hlii merclM art new erery morning and Hla com paaaiona Ml not. ” Ilia merciea are new every morning, Heavy and long is the night. The ic* moans m blaekneaa of darkness— There may be a wreck era the light. Lo ! sodden—a gleam on the mountains— The shadow* are fleeing away; viwa touches the clouds with sen-fingers And opens the gates of the day. Hi* mercies are new every morning, And oh, His compassions ne'er fail, To the timid sheep cropping the herbage, The mariner breasting the gale; The child, born to love and to langhter, ^ Ihe sinner, whom tears cannot shrive, The mourner left “sleeping for sorrow.” The sick man who wakes up alive 1 “Hs mercies are new every morning !" —^ In the Joy of our youth-time we sang; Hi* mercies are new every morning !” We sing y«t with faltering tongue. And we 11 sing it till bursts the grand music That all earth’s faint anthem stills, - And we see She liay-et*r arising Above the eternal hill*. Ihttah Unlock Oraik, in Congrcgationalist. Too I3usy. r r A MOTHEH 8 CON FE88ION. Wli €L' “Mother I mother I” cried my little Willy , coming in npon me, ns I sat busily ‘ work, ‘T ve lost my arrow in the grass can’t find it” He was just ready to burst into tears from grief at his mishap. “I’m sorry, dear,” I said calmly, as I went on with my work. 4 “Won’t yon go and find it with mo, mother?” he asked with a quivering lip, as he laid hold on my arm. “I’m too busy, dtar,” I replied, gently shaking him off. “Go and tell Jane to find it for you." “Jane can’t find it,” said the little fellow* in a choking voice. “Tell her to go and look again.” “She has looked all nvar, and can’t find it. Won’t you come, mother, and find it for me ?” The tears were now rolling over his face. Bnt I was too busy to attend to Willy. I was embroidering the edge of a little linen sack that I was making for Rim, and that, for the moment, seemed of mote importanoe than the happiness of my child. “No—no,** I replied. ‘Tm too busy to go down stairs. You must take better oare of your arrows. Go and ask Ellen to find it for you.” “Ellen aaya she won’t look for it." Willy was now crying outright. “There 1 there 1 don’t be so foolish os te cry at the loss of such a little thing aa an arrow," said I, in a reproving voice “I’m aahamed of you !” “Won’t you go and find it for me, mother 7" he urged, still crying. “No indaed, Willy. I’m too busy now. Go and look for it again yourself. ” “But I can't find it. I have looked. ’ “Then go and look again,” aaid I, firmly. Willy went crying down stairs, and I heard him orying about the yard-for ten minutes, until my patience to give oni 'Bach a to-do about an arrow I I wish d never bought him the bow-arrow !” ■aid I, moving uneasily in my chair. -“Ellen, won’t you make me another arrow f Here is a stick,” I heard him aak of the cook, in a pleading voice. But Ellen replied rudely— “No jpdped, I shall not 1 I’ve got something else to do besides making ar ^mbogan to The child’* crying was renewed. I felt vezld at Ellen. “She might have made him the arrow," I said. “If 1 waan’t so busy I would go down and make him one myself. But I moat get this sack dime.” And 1 sewed away more rapidly than before. The crying went on. Willy had lost hie arrow, end hie heart wee al most broken. Unfortunately, I wee not in a mood to empathize with him. An arrow, to me, wae a very little thing, and it worried me to henr him crying aa if his heart would break over a loes so trifling os that of an arrow. “Willy 1” t at length aaid, calling out of the window, “you must stop that cry ing.” “I can’t find my arrow, and nobody will make me another,” replied the little fellow. * . “That’s nothing to make such a dis turbance about I” I said. “Gtf and find something else to play with.” “I want my arrow. Won’t you come and find it for me, mother ?” r ^‘No, not iio#. I’m too busy. The crying went on again as before, and I soon lost all my patience. Lay ing aside my work, *I~w«nt to the head of the#teirway and called down— “Come, now. Sir ! There's been enough of this orying, and yon must ■top iC" . “I can’t flpd my arrow,” returned Wfily. * ' “Wall, suppose you can’t; will crying # ring it? Ton must take better care of our things. Little boys must look the way thqyshooi” Tdid look, but I cant And * “Go and look again, then.” “I haw looked, but it ain’t there.” And then the crying went on again. To Willy tike loss of bis arrow was a real grief, and ha was too young to have for- titnda to bear Mb trouble patiently. But I was not M estate «f mind toleel with baa. rr eeid I. again upon ■yeafit “1 won’t have aaeh e name in But my words had no effect; they did not produce the arrow. Willy cried cm. Unable longer to endure the sound, and also thinking it wrong to let him in dulge the habit of crying, I laid my work aside, and going down stairs, took hold of him resolutely, saying aa I did so— “Now, stop this instantly I” The child looked up to ms with a most distressed countenance, while the tears covered his face. “I can’t find my arrow,” said he with quivering lip. “I’m sorry—but crying won’t find it. Gome up stairs with me.” Willy as cended to my room, “Now don’t let me hear one word more of this. The next time you get an arrow take better care of it.” There was no sympathy in my tone; for I felt none. I did not think of his loss, but of the evil and annoyance of crying. The little fellow stifled his grief, or rather the utterance of it, as best he could, and throwing himself at full length upon the floor, sighed and sobbed for some ten minutes. A sigh, longer and more flattering than usual, aroused my attention, and then I be came aware that he had fallen asleep. How instantly do our feelings change toward a child when we find that it is asleep. If we have been angry or of fended, we are so no longer. Tender ness comes in the place of sterner emo tions. I laid aside my work, and taking Willy in my arms, lifted him from the floor, and laid him upon my bed. An other long, fluttering sigh, agitated his l>osem as his head touched the pillow. How reprovingly came the sound upon my ears I How sadly did it echo and •e-ocho in my heart 1 “Poor child 1” I murmured. “To him the loss of an arrow was a great thing. It has diaturl>ed him to the very centre of his little being. I wish, now, that I had put by my work for a few minutes until I could have found his arrow, or made him a new one. I would have lost no more time in doing so than I have al ready ioet. And, after all, what is a lit-y tie lime taken from my work to th^ happiness of my child ? Ah, me 1 I wish I could learn to think right at the right time. Dear little fellow I He was so happy with his bow and arrow. But all was destroyed by the untimely loss, which I could have restored in a few moments. Unfeeling—unnatural mo ther ! Is this the way you show your love for your child ?” I stood for nearly five minutes over my sleeping boy. When 11tuned away, 1 did not resume my sewing, for I had no heart to work upon the little gar ment. I went down into the yard, and the first object that met my eye was the lost arrow, partly concealed behind a rose-bush, where it had fallen. “So easily found!” said L “How much would a minute given at the right time have saved t Ah, me I We learn too late, and repent when repentance is of little avaiL” It was on hour before the deep sleep into which my Willy had fallen, waa broken. I had, in the meantime, re sumed my sewing, after having lost fully half an hour in consequence of being unwilling to lose a few minutes for the sake of attending to my child, and relieving him of the trouble that had come upon him. The first notice I re ceived of hla being a awake, waa his gratified exclamation at finding his lost arrow beside him. All his past grief was forgotten. In a few minutes he was down in the yard, shooting his arrow again, and aa happy aa before. No trace of his recent grief remained. But I could not forget it With me the droamstanoe was not aa the morn ing cloud and the early daw. The sun shine that came afterward did not dis sipate instantly the one, nor drink np the other. I was sober for many hoars afterward; for the consciousness of hav ing done wrong, as well as having been the occasion of grief to my child, lay with a heavy pressure upon my feelings, —T. 8. Arthur A Heavy Cannonading. - . c The Fredericksburg Standard says; John Bussell, colored, was engaged in plowing near Alum Spring, on Saturday, and had to set fire to the stubble so it would burn off. While the fire was burning near the bank of Hazel run, he says it occurred to him that he ought to unhitch his horse and shelter himself behind a tree near by from some danger he knew not of at the time. This thonght so impressed itself upon him that he did unhitch and took a stand near the tree. He had been them bnt a few minutes when a loud explosion took place, followed by another and another in rapid succession until the eleventh one had taken place. John says he was terribly frightened, and for some time pieoes of shells and balls, etc., fell all PRINCELY ECCENTRICITIES TI1B WAT TBS QUBHTH CKIVBO. WEBB RE- New Yerfcer Dtepeaeetf ins Heepballty. [Tram the New York Times.] Mr. Henry Havemeyer, whom sanity is to be inquired into by a commission, has long been known to a wide circle of friends and acquaintances as a jolly good fellow and a princely host, and to this circle the announcement of his unfor tunate mental condition, If it does not come wholly as a surprise, will at least' be received with unfeigned regret, Mr. Havemeyer entertained freely at his house in New York city, but it Is chiefly on his entertainments at his country scat that his fame for hospitality rests. His country seat is on an islet known as Havemeyer’s Island, in the Great South Bay, on the Atlantic shore of Long fhland. Upon this property, which "Mr. Havemeyer obtained by pur chase a number of years ago, he sot up a model country establishment and insti tuted a princely and in many respects unique system of entertainment. Com munication with New York is h^id chiefly by way of Babylon and the Long Island Railroad, and for the conveyance of his gneets between the island and Babylon Mr. Havemeyer provided himself with a fine steam launch. He frequently en tertained parties of ladies and gentlemen, hut “stag parties" were his particular delight When a stag party appi oached the island iu the steam launch its mem bers were astonished, not to saystartlad, by a salvo of artillery from a masked battery near the lauding. The surprise of the guests was inorossed on lauding to find a corps of tormentors attired as United States Custom House officers, rushing for their baggage, and insisting on the formality of a rigid examination of portmanteaux and bandboxes. Be ing finally, and after all the delay ordi narily experienced by New Yorkers re turned from a European trip, acquitted of attempted smuggling, the guests pro ceeded to Mr. Havemeyer’s residence, and were struck speechless at the aight of uniformed and armed sentries pacing before the entrance. If the arrival did not take place near his dinner hour, the party was beguiled, as it elected, during the intervening time, with a sailing or fishing excursion, or some other out-door amusement. It was at the dinner hour, however, that the farcial climax was reached. The guests were ushered into the dining hall with great formality by Mr. Havemeyer himself. When all were seated the host placed himself at the head of the table and tapped a silver bell Instantly doors flew open on different sides of the room, and in filed what seemed to be an im posing visitation of military command ers, bnt really waiters bedecked in the grndy uniforms of Austrian and Prnaian Generals, French Marshak, and offloera of other effete European monarehlas. The semblance waa complete down to the smallest particulars. The mimic officers were helmeted and plumed, sparred, beswarded, and «p*uUfod_ Bnt to heighten the caricature each gen eralissimo bore aloft upon his gloved and uplifted hands a dish of sumptuous and savory viands. Bnt there the farce ended. There was no caricature about the cuitine. Those who have had the good fortune to sit at Mr. Havemeyer’s hospitable board would have to go (ar to find a more sumptuous table. The peculiar features with which he encompassed his hospitality wars re garded at the time as the taaotment of a clever satire on foreign pomposity and certain existing domes tty^om toms. A quarter of a Omtary. At the meeting of the Beciety of the Army of the PqUwao Gen. Horace For ter, in his address aaid: “It is nearly a qoarter ef a century sfcMeftMftntgUlwnf ftmA OD Sumter, hot a lend nport, hot it was the elgnfftnul shot t'&i* frenStya* verberations did reached to f< whole world werat war. afcd child ifi the cause K>nL TM from awoke a used to the >le; its re- tbey had told the Republic man. around him. of shells and fire nlodod. that a pile g the war TERY YOUNG MASON* Bt«fct Rather MstteuwaS Raj* Lmd MM f»l4*4 lata L* Blaeerit* LeSe* A oobbmpordbbt writes: WO) yob please inform me whea atcaw. Jutty can be worn without exciting comment ? Certeinly. Straw hats ban be worn with out < xciting comment when they are worn on the head. Bn^when they are worn cavorting along the street in a gale of wind yon must expect a remark or twa.—J*kitmdrtpkim (MU. woman s a worker the nation’s ighty gathering of that ymfi anqft'v The doors of Am workshepB were timed, the fields waee descried. Armed men poured down fromthe hill tope and surged up from the Yallepa. The whole land became one vast military camp, and man fell that!^ lived again in the heroic ages. “burke once aaid no war ever left a nation where it found it. It was emi nently so with oar war. It found sla very; it left freedom. It found treason; K w*. M'kfl loyalty. It found the leprosy of when this ® oe * e > on ; left a redeemed and regen- all American citizen a byword and proach in the world; it left the name ** American citizen the proudest passport that man can carry throughout the na tions of the earth. 'The great lessons of the war are ever present with or The record of its battles has passed into his tory and the serafl tm which that history is written bee been aeemety lodged in ef the temple of The ceremony of Masonic baptism end adoption of childm was performed in the Grand Lodgs room by Am French lodge La Sinoerits, of New York. This ceremony has rarely bean performed in pnblie in this country, and (he great hall was crowded with invited guests of the lodge, including many ladies and gentleman in evening drees. A local paper thus describes the affair : The members of the lodge formed open rank in the centre aisle with crossed swords held high, while, at a given signal, eight boys were bronght in blindfolded, led by their parents, their ages ranging ftom three years to ten. Some of the boys looked a little frightened, and grasped their parents’ hands rather tightly. Brother Herdet received them at the top of the steps, and at a given signal the bandages were removed from the youngsters’ eyes, evidently much to their relief. They looked about in a dazed way, and timidly walked upon the platform. The youngest, to the great amusement of the audienoe, stoutly reskted being pot in the place where he wm expected to stand. His mother was obliged to go npon the platform and asrist in the cere monies. The sponsors of the children took the solemn obligation to aid the children to the utmost in performing the duties of Masonry. Then the children were in turn taken to the font and baptized by washing of their hands, and thence to the altar, whereon was a blazing fire, and where they knelt. The youngest of the eight kept up his reputation, and continued to amuse the audience by stoutly resisting, and hie mother was obliged to join the circle at the altar. Next the members of La Sinoerits Lodge took the solemn vow binding them to accept the children, which wee duly confirmed, the members ef the lodge rising and (dapping their hands in oaf- son at a signal - tThe children were then jpveeted with the aprons and jewels of Masonry, all of them but thA jfoungent jhstug highly pleased with their regalia. The young est, however, was again obstreperous end had to be persuaded by hie mother, and poeafhty by stureptitipus candy. Fi nally the youngsters were all settled. Then they were all crmeecraled, and the orator of the lodge, Brother Lellemand, made hn address. Brother Charles T. McClenachan explained in English that La Sinoerite Lodge had pledged itself to guard and protect these little children and see that they were educated in Free Masonry, to restrain them from vice and keep them from the snaref that snrround the young. The ceremony of the wwh- ing of hands was not intended to inter fere in the slightest degree with any re ligious faith, bat was symbolic of ap proaching the throne of divine grace with pure hearts. Manuring Pear Trees. THE PANAMA CAftAL BOW TUB CONTI DENCB OF T17BI.1C Wax SBUKBD. TBB t>Mk* Msec ke Bent at Beta Dlceh. Most people are under the impression that tbs entrances to the Panama canal are to be open to the eoa, without any looks or other hindrance*. This, indeed, may have been the primitive intention of the originators of the scheme, bnt s more thorough etndy of the question hss shown that, though it would be pos sible to construct the canal under those conditions, there are forcible reasons for closing the canal with a look chamber at the extremity where it will join the Pacific ocean. It has been ascertained that the tides in the Atlantic and Pacifie differ very materially. At Colon, on the Atlantic, the difference between high and low water mark is not more than fifty-eight centimetres, whereas at Panama, on the Pacific, the average va riation in the height of the water is four metres, and is sometimes not less than six. Moreover, high water at Colon i* about nine hours later than at Panama The maximum difference which could exist between the level of the water* of the two oceans would therefore be eqnal to half the height to which the tide rises at Panama, on the Pacific. As re gards the above-mentioned difference in the tides at Colon and Panama, all the above-stated facts have been well known for the past half a century. Fifty yean ago Col. Lloyd, who ran a line of levels from sea to sea, made known to the en gineering world the above facts, and they must have been known, or should have been known, by the French engi neers who made the preliminary survey, for Count de Ijeaseps some four yean or more ago. Since Cel. Lloyd’s survey, the American engineer who laid the line of the Panama railroad must certainly have rediscovered these facts in regard to the levels of the Atlantic and Psciflc oceans. However that may be, the pres ent engineers of the canal company have only very recently discovered that they cannot make this an absolutely “sea level canal” That k a natural im possibility. They have greatly abused the confidence of the public and the in- nooent subecribera to the capital stock of the “Interooeanic Canal Company,” by promising an open, unlocked “*e* level” canal, at a certain (and compara tively cheap) cost, which promise served as a basis to catch contributions for the ■hares. The Marshall Statue. I Pear trees often suffer tot lack of J proper fertilizers. The correct way to manage pear trees is to apply each au tumn a dressing of well decomposed stable manure, leaf mould, a little gyp- Btun or lime and muck; this to be forked in around the extremities of the roots. Of coarse, on rich soils this compost is not necessary, but on poo lands a dress ing of well rotted compost two inches (tap Till prove of value. Avoid fer menting manures for fruit trees. Also ’j, tribunal avoid Am common error of permitting Am trees to degenerate for want of plant food for several years and then apply an immense quantity. This plan induces an unnatural growth which ie liable to be seized with disease. By Am way, a good plan when manors is required is tc apply the compost one year and wood ashes or ground bone the next.” Pear blight remains more or lees of a mystery to hortioultoriete. Treee grown on over-moist or too rich sofl that stimu lates to a late second growth are liable to blight, Avoid damp soil for pear trees and do not apply sommer top-dress ing that is liable to stimulate too late growth. Eastern hortieultarieta say to graft or bad the Kieffer on pear stock; it does not thrive when grafted on quince stock. It is half a century lacking a year since the movement Was started to erect in Washington a monument to commemo rate the services of Chief Justice Mar shall The memorial has taken the form of a statue by Story, which lately unveiled with appropriate monies. Hereafter visitors to the na tional capital may view the striking fea tures of Am great Chief Jus tics, bnt not all will res Use how original and unique ie hie title to the honor now paid him. It is not simply because he wm a profound ls#yer or a great judge, but because of his achievements in a field of public service which, when he entered it, wee aa new aa it waa important, He became Chief Justice when, for the first time in modern history at least, the fundamental law of a nation had been embodied in a written eonstitation, and hence when, toe the first time, a judicial • called upon to expound each an instnunenh The ecienoe of constitutional interpretation then had its origin, and Marshall waa its founder. Without the aid of guiding authority or precedent he laid Ihe foundation on which the body of our conatitntincal law aa sinoe judicially developed has been built up. The work of Marshall, there fore, differs from that of any other judge, American or foreign, for the rea son that he was the great pioneer in a new department of judicial labor. His greatness lies in the extent, the import ance and the sneoesa of his services in this field A Washington Crank. Jr Am highest The Philadelphia Pret* says: That remarkable crank, Maurice PinehoveT, who has haunted the halls of the Capi tol at Washington so long end to whom Ben Perley Poore gave a national fame by patting his picture in the Centmrf jmpef when the collector m Magamne, is dying in ea insane asylum ^ them, averting that they had at Washington. His pet delusion was that some member of Congress, usually the Speaker, had swindled him out of millione of acres of land. How often he has come storming around the Hones of Representatives, and been forced out no body but the police can tell Until lately he was never more violent than to pound with the big tin ease in which he carried the title deeds to Me fictitious whoever ventared to dieagree with Then hie eranhiem took a mm one turn and for fear that ha aright do harm ha waa onenmltted to the asylam in which he wfffc probably take imve of life. He is ea mtoreetii^ mental wreak. Nobody knows anything of Me antaee- » but it ie evident from hti talk ia moments that ha has bean a high ty * No Paper Next Week. BDITOB WHO DOBS MOT BABB TBB BA MX MI8TAXX TW1CR SEVENTY TEARS OF PROGRESS. Mr. Beecher Olree the Beetle* Ceafereece Heaie Menerlce el Hie LAI*. At the Baptist Conference held in New York, Henry Ward Beecher said: “During my journey from Am he; at to Boston, after graduating and while oa my way to Ohio, the driver on the ata|s pointed out to me a bank of earth, and ■aid: ‘That’s a railroad, I guees they call it.’ That waa the Boston and Worcester Railway, and it waa the flffet I believe, with the exception of a small railway between Quincy and Boston, that had ever been constructed. It took me ten days to go from New York to Cincinnati I rode from Albany to Schenectady with Martin Van Boren, and as soon as it was known that we were on board we were saluted with salvos of artillery from every place that we passed, and that will account for the fact that I have b~en making a noise ever since. “Looking at our railway system for hundreds and thousanda of miles, I think that this iron road has been, under God, the means of changing the civilisation of this country, both socially and politically, and it has had gseat in fluence aside from its other aaeocutiona in war and in peace. “The most important applications ot steam have been in my time, and to-day the rivers are miserable democrats, looked down npon by the aristocratic steam road everywhere. Then the whole telegraphic system has been in my day, and the telephone, which I don’t yet believe in. Although faith is the evidence of things not seen, thing* beard and not seen require more faith. Then the development of the electrical machinery, which has been the post-boy over land and under the sea, and is now coming to bring light everywhere. Thin, when I was in college and had some love letter to write, I could write on a sheet as big as a newspaper, but if I put in a bit of paper as large as my little finger they charged me doable price. It was first 26 cents, then 18) cents, then 12$ cents, and it was a great triumph when we could send a letter for 10 cents or five cents. So J have seen the problem of cheap postage solved in my time. “The discoveries of Dagnetre have been of great benefit in science and art In my own case I don't know whether, from the representations of my own face taken when a boy, I am glad or not, but T would give all I am worth if the dis covery had been made in my mother'a time. Every minister should preach to his congregation that it is their duty to have the photograph of eaoh child taken once a year until it is twenty-one, and then the children will take oare of the matter themcelves.” Soapstone Fleur. In Congressman Green’s meant speech before the U. S. House on the adultera tion of food and drugs he miotioned some of the doctored articles that am of fered for human oonenmptton. They in cluded gluoooe syrup, soapstone flow, ooooanut-shell end red lead pepper and so on. Among these the floor aaid to be made largely of steatite or eoepetoue seems specially queer, and Mr. Green spoke of it in this fashion; “Now, sir, what would be your infer ence, if told by the proprietor of one of these saponaceous quarries, as I have been, that he finds a ready sale for all the soapstone flour that he ean grind. ■And who am your customera T ‘Chiefly commercial millers and sugar But at least it is ooneolitig to says a Washington oorraspandant, that at the meant pries of grain it mast have become a somewhat lose lucrative invest ment to mix even pulverised stone will flour. What Caused a Disaster. [From Carl Pretzel’* Weekly.] We h||S no desire to brush the down off the peach, but it becomes necessary sometimes. Occasions am not rare when citlaens request aa, personally, to place their names on oar subaeription list. Ooeaskma am not mm whan come of positively mfam to pay for the when the collector calls upon never or- teed it cent to them. An instance of this kind happened last week, when an aldermen requested aa, personally, to •end him the paper. We not only did that, but gave hie busineee a alight in troduction to our readers who live in hi* vicinity, not a thousand miles from Fourth avenue and Hatriaon street The col lector called upon him end he de clared that he knew nothing about it sod had never ordered H, yet admitted that he had mad Am article with a great deal of relish. Tbs alderman, who, by Am way, does not represent the ward in which hie branch store is located, w% get no paper this week, yet we do not consider that we have wasted any sweet sees on the desert afo, lor ^ the future AMta who orte the w ^ wUl pay toe it when they tel go. The explosion in the Poeahontee Mine in Southweet Virginia, by which so many men lost their lives, is now Attributed to the presence of a great deal of fine coal and coal dost on the (loon of the Brine. This dust mingled with air constitutes an explosive mixture which ean be fired by the approach of a flame «f any kind. In the Pocahontas mine, where this duet was very abundant, them waa no lack of opportunities for the introduction of flame, as it was customary to use a great deal of powder in Masting out the coal Borne of the powder was undoubtedly wasted by the inexperienced miners and mingled with the fine coal, thus adding to the danger. A locomotive with an open fire was also being constantly ran into the mine. It is considered certain that there was no fire damp. Not That Knro or a Bot.—A couple of pretty tourists came down the lake in the steamer Vermont the other day, and while promenading the deck one d them suddenly exclaimed: “Oh, Nelly, there’s a buoy f” “Wbem-wbem 7” ex claimed the other, ex; rr Watty and gaa- iog around among Am scattered passen gers. “Them-out on tge water; just to Am right of the steanMr** bow. “O pshaw I” was the disappointed reply. “I thought you meant a real hve, smart, good-looking New England boy. Pve seen all Am wooden boys I want to in New York this winte.* THE HUMUBOUS.PAPEB& *i WBAT WH FIHB 1M “Papa, what Is the tart*?” a Ooagmasman’a Httte boy. at tt the father replied: “My eon, I cannot tali a He. I do not know. ”—Buffalo Eaeprtm. a srunroB mrr worn. A golden-haired SUeBee put He head in at a door. “Did you send for me 7” “Of course I didn't,” mplhin wan in a long apren. “A messenger boy arid somebody along here wanted to sat am” “Well, ’twa’n’t me; Pm a barber. Maybe it wae the marohaot nest door. I heard him say he waa going to quit advertising.”—Chicago Ainas. OOMMBBOIAL eZAIMROB. A young gentlemen of finances were not in the I and whoee reputation lor sobriety wae not much better, to an Austin rnsrehant for a position eg salesman. He bed hardly had time fcf get fairly into the office, when fe'esBM oat very abruptly. "Did the boos him youaeaakemaBF' asked a friend who waa standing outride, “No, but he wanted me to trawl"— Austin Sifting*. a di- 5^3 A guest entering hurriedly man and wife flashed, tnrttgnent •bevelled. “What's tha matterr ha sahu Husband (triumphantly)—"We aq| settling as to who ii bom 1" Guest—"Have you eetUefHt 7" Wife— (viotorkmety)—"We have r Quest—“Whtoh fottr Both—“Me r—fffiWefor's Jfa—dm. Burnley wae making an evmdag sail nice littiahapaf the faarity had la rim i In up a little late “Ms,” he said, during a lul Jg tha HOnveraatiao, “eaa whisky talkfjj. “Osrtaimly not," arid ma; It that absurd notion into yew f “Well,” he replied, “I heard you say to pa that whisky was tsIUag anMr. Burnley and I wanted te knew what ft said.”—Chicago IHhnne. Whan Gan. B. man, two gtris, busrding-houee, i love with him. Bothladte in tha parier ena awning and Hi making violent low 2o one of mash to the chagrin of te flounced to Am piano and aam, Ages” at tha top * tar wto^leyMg particular straw on te Has: “Simply to thy orors-ey* sting.”—- MUTUAli A young gen whfie calling on bar band and tawt, and He toM her ha had mind for a tag time, bnt would gat mad. Sha what it was than, and ho Erssx part of the any large ores of through dieetphne. soul, if iH Saw he: promise not to gqt “I haw two Mary." *110111 Eflstnm. Be onrffls (Ma.) ffbjrih "Yasj ha tote fat teawttpg Instead ot stoyttig “But Us “Oh I of k ft w* * decee, but I knew a ] off which nobody ewg thinks of ing. Baoould tew slipped intemi ^rJtet plaee do yon rater “To s store kept by ft ftitqt af Mr Eao’s in te nsit streak"i ^torer Why pould he be ate iromuteovery there r The proprietor does not advertise.’ -ten** Chflr'jTp ' SHOULD OU> “Did you know papa boy reeked a mother, down of “Why, vfeeta tainly not I didn’t until he #a* a you ask r “Oh, ’causa l •ft*