Historical Newspapers of South Carolina

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Thc New Fable of thc Through Train, thc Tw9 Pacccngcra and Nuthinp. Doing In tho Way of Trancfcro. Two High Behool Heliotropes named Lib and Anglo were very Thick. They hod themselves photographed with their Heads together und used to Dab themselves with the samo Piece of Chamois. Whenever Lib got a new Patch for her Silk Crazy Quilt she would divido with Anglo on a GO-50 Basis. And whenever Angie got ready to sleep on a Pioco of Wedding Cake she would ptach out a good r>'sable Hunk for Lip. Each Girl kept a Nightie ut tho Other Girl's I loane and, long after they had retired,.the Inmates would hear smothered Giggles, interspersed with Fragmenta of what He said to Her and what Sho said to Him. Tho Period of their Adolescence wae about ?O years ago, when Ro maneo was ctlli alive and Knighthood v.'aa in Flower around every Dancing Acndomy West of Pittsburgh. Tho two Chu nw had mado a Pact. They -.vero lo bo/Frlends forever and evor and over nn'd neither waa to hold out nnythlng from tho othor. ; ? Each carried in a Locket a Four Leaf Clover prosenled by Ono to whom sho had bared her Soul. 'After supplementing tho Graded Schools with, a full courno of Mrs. Southworth and learning to. play "Thu Maiden's Prayer" on tho Mclodeon, naught romnl?ed' f?r them l? tho way of passionate Diversion excopt to go ahead and get Married. They waited throo years for tho Fairy Prince of their Droama to come .clattorlng down Main Street in his Coach all White, and Gold, nnd then j began to tuiutrust the Schedule. So they efT:Tlod the usual Compromise, j falling gracefully Into tho awkward j Embraces, of two cornfed Lizard?; named Otis and Wilbur. In tho Shake-off lt befell that Anglo got Wilbur and Llb droW Otis. Tho .twa Brldc3 wero jaomowhat envied, as Wilbur WOB a Good-Looker with raven Ppn??ndo'ur and largo Bnappy EyeB, sWhHe Otis Waa supposed to possess .tho Faculty ot copping tho M?zuine. ? , However, th'p purpose of this Fublo la to indicate that onch Gal found out Had 1 .-msclveo ?Kotographed With' Their Heads Tonather. I > - . I ^tpO'late-that abe had- Dutch fd hor i . Book and b?cted Into tho wrong Pad- ; vdock. . ' j Fate fl?parated tho Young Couples j 'and many a-Full Moon donated itooif ? ?befor? Llb and. Angie had another ?cha?en tc got away fey themselves aud fill up on Oolong and cautiously-exhib ??11their Wounds. V Wilbur was a Hustler w'ho lacked /.Tormina! Fujilltiea. Ho waa full of St. Vitus Activity and was always j ?transferring a lot of Papera from ono I ?i Pocket to another, and' getting; ready: .flo interest Capital in some .Megather (lan Enterpriao paying 20 per ci: ut per ? Annum, but comehow ho never Ar-i y; rived. . j . Wiillp negotiating for a Rubb/T ' iPlnntatlon la Yucatan ho would ?--ar ." about Two Million Aerea walting to ' , ib?' Irrigated''in Colorado, but' before : fi ho ;.Cv"*d turn on the W^ter ho would : f ob lured away, by tho Prospect of de-1 vjv.eloplug epme Monte -Corio pVoposlr j' .Vftlon upon tito Mcnabo Range, ' v.i;.; In tho mointlrae ho wore Celluloid ?vj Collars and ? owad for evory? Round ..UStcak" that ho had ca?rled home dur? SfflK-:ibp prececlit.g Five Years. i [^|>^i(^-v?n'. the Other Hand, played! "'nothing butClnchcg. Ho was oat'for I .Vitae Pastry: It was noibffl'Fault If j ? ii;?. Widows au.d .'Otphnna i-Vfho invest* ] cs-l pii; his Tips oil- wouhO'.u^ .aa De- ' ? .v^riment Store Employas. , j Ho douMc cvoD3cd his Partners and. -1iJ^h?ps?W'?'J his Customers and bluffed ? ...:3.be' Cpurta-'and' bullea'his way into:th?-1 ;gci-on'gaofas': of - Finance. -" .'. % While ?b'e,U, ;S; Grand Jury would. '8?f?8ipn, trying-to get hint: with " ,. he woiird ht motoring in ' -'nd .tossing Sapwera .olail* eaaatttry. '..'-.; ?''/;{';.:? Do not mistrust tho Talc, for ovn;y Ruccanecr fruin Broad st reel, K. Y., to tho St. Francia liar ni tin* Golden Cato, was Otico a Poor lioy with Storo Clothes on his Hack and Grund Lar ceny in li i H Heart. When Ani;le went to visit Lib, after tho Lapso of Many Years, you con Gamble that they had Homo Talk to unload. Anglo carried a Wicker Suit-Case costing vl.!>S and her General Get-Up was that of tho Honest Creature who may bo found In any Hotel Corridor nt '1 A. M. massaging tho Mosaic Floor with a Hot Cloth. i:Gc-t ino!" said Wilbur's wife, drop ping wearily to u Divan In tho Style of Louie Quatorze. "Pipa tho Lld! It is a I9UG Model and tho Aigrette ia made of Hrooin Straw. Take n Peek at tho shine Tui!or-Mado and the Paper Shoes. Ever nineo they wished that False Alarm on to mo 1 lmvo hcen giv ing a correct Imitation of Lizzie tho Honest Working Girl, Each Evening he comes home to givo n|?_n Sweet rope and a Sot of Gray Squirrels, aud next Morning, when I get up to re move tho Oatmeal from the Fireless Cooker, I Cad on' tho Back Porch a largo Roughneck in a Sweater who hau come to shut off tho Gas or take ; away the Parlor Furniture. , Then I ? think of you, with your Closets hang ing full of fluffy Frocks and your Fin gers crowded with Jewels and your Man mulling in every few Minutes to slap you In tho Face with a Hundred Dollar DUI. You can fcako itfrom sae, Dearie, I would jump tho whole Game, wcro lt not for tho Children. I have put fn my whole Lifo trying to realizo something on a Promissory Note that t\ns a Dloomor to begin with, He has kidded m<? along over slnco the World's Fair at Chicago, feeding me on Canned Stuff nod showing mo pic tures of Electric Runabouts nnd Coun try Places on, Long Inland. In the Meantime I am playing in Great Luck if I can get a Trolley Car to stop j for mo." j At this point tho Wifo of Otis arosa end, pulling the rose-colored Silk Wrapper moro closely about her mado to-order Form, interrupted with an Imperious Gesture. "Dock up. Angle!" aho exclaimed. "You should bo a Knppy Woman. You havo your Husband's ?..ovo and you havo your Children, both of which aro denied a Woman of my Assured Posi tion In tho Two Minute Class cf. the. Terrible Spenders. Talk about Hard ships! Do you know what lt ls to lead tho Grand March, surrounded by SOO AsBegal-Throv-rs, Harpooners and Cannibal Qu. cns, who aro pointing you out ns tho Wifo of tho Malefactor who Is about to bo Tried In the' F?d eral Courts? Did you ever Stagger around all Evening with $100,000 worth of Tiffany Morohandiso . fastened on to you-expecting every Minute to bo lilt In tho Coiffure by tomo Raffles? Did you over, during a Formal Dinner, hear tho Door Doll tinkle ?nd find in tho Hallway a Reporter from a Morn ing Papor who wishes - to aBk your Husband If ho denies lila Guilt or can give any Reason why Sentence of Death Should not bo pasBed upon him? Aro you Wiso to tho Fact that the Wife of a Successful Business Man now occupies a Niche in the Hall of Famo right noxt to tho,Sister of JOBBO James? You aro in Great Luck. No one takes a Shot at a Failure." ? Having arrived at thia cordial Un derstanding, each leaned against tho other and had a Good Cry. after which they chirked up and paid a lot of at tention to a well-preserved Bachelor who dropped.In to got warm and take a slight Fall out of tho Side-Board, j . if ORAL: When Wealth WOIKS In at I the Door, tho Press Agent comes In through.th? Window. One Hundred Years Ago. Ono hundred years ago Andrew Jackson, tho futuro president, waa ap pointed a major general in the United States army, to AU tho vacancy caused by the resignation of William Henry Harrison. The appointment waa In recognition of General Jackson's dis tinguished services In tho war with ?the Creek Indian?. Tho Legislature of Mississippi Mfrrltory voted bim a! sword, and numerous ' otber honors wore bestowed upon him. Genoral Jacksor, immediately upon hi?, .ap pointment as major general, waa as signed to tho command of the Army .octile -South and Tn July he assumed command at Fort Jackson, on tho Mis sissippi, rlrar, about 63 miles below New-Orleans.. Here be mot the chiefs Ot tho Creek' Indians,, nnd after much diplomacy .negotiated terms ot peace known aa \ the treaty of Fort Jackson. 'But Something .to.Dream Over. .Suspicious Mama-Ethel, what de tained you.at tho doer just now when .Mr.'.Spooner wont away?" >'?|?the1 '(smoothing her. rumpled hair) --Npthi^g to speak of, mam?. _ Doubtful. "Ia siggins enjoying his now auto mobile?" \ \?l ifor'i think BO. He has not boen arrested once B?nce he had lt for ex ceeding tho* speed limit." Delfin, Ircland, Dec. ll. Ircland is making ?1 bold bid fur the capture ut Bcveral marketa bia.orto dumina'.ed by "<IK;,iy t ador?." 'lay.;, carperAs, and cigarettes aro thc mo.it isucceasful itruuipIcH > r now indu Ht rica IMUS fur lisveloped. '? lu- new workshops for the manu facturo of (foll.-; and toy; luve at tract! ! large D.; m be ts of girl ur. I wu ruen workers w.io ?vere :hro\vn out of employment by the hard timen prevail t. in tho lace .*uii millinery trade In Hillas: and Dublin. .Thc financial rfc'iltd of U ?.? new c?itccpriso arc ai'.! to ho most cncauraglns. The ?.Turkish" currents muda ?a In land aro o" ?.? typo which experta declare destined to deceive even the elect ff Constantinople. lt is not able thu: ene of tho largest of recmt d<;rs conies from Egypt. Thc manu facture of lintid-tuftod carpets is about fifteen yearn old in County Donegal, ami gives employment io hundreds of peasants who have Inherited ".Tough all the troubled ages of Irish history, jo subtle "knack" for form and color that distinguished their Celtic anees* ta ri. Cigarette factories have sprung up as if. by magic in Roveral cities, and ere employing ?.Mea numbers of nim blo-lngored giris. There is also talk of n commercial plr.ya fat torv in Dub lin. ' Again Heads Democratic Caucus of Senate. ? Senator John W. Kern. Senator John W. Kern cf Indiana, han been reelected to the chairman ship of the senate democratic caucus* His olection took place at tho first ] meeting of tho caucus ?cveral days ago. It IB sure Ibo will see sonic nobie battles boforo tho fights over many senate questions aro fought to a linlah. English of the Diamond. In tlio -National Da-guoo ls un um pire w" o ly a stickler for correct de portment on tho diamond. In n game in which he ofllciattcd at tho Kolo grounds carly in tho'saas'on'.'as Chief Moy ero. the Itviiaii catcher for New York, carno to bat, certain of the lios I ten-playera aittlcg on -heir beuch be gan to guy i!.?a brawny rod man. In ah in?'ant tho umpire had left his place behind the cnte-iier and was runntng t'evard tho slvitor3* bomb proof. "Cal Out . them psrsacalltlcB!" he ?ordered. "Cut out them personali ties!" . As he turned away a higfi-pitchod volco filtered out from tho ' grand Btani behind him, saying: "Cut out them grammer!"-Satur day Evening Post. For infants and Children. Un Uso For Over 30 Years Signature of *&e&?S'????Gtf? C&EAM FOR CATARRH OPENS UP NOSTRILS TclUi How TO Get Quick Relief from Hcad-Cotds, Its Splendid: ^ * ?.? .? m m II m ?i II i ii u i-rn In ono minute your clogged nostrils will open the air pa^jago ot. your head will clear and you ison breathe freoly. . No ' more, hawking, snuffing, blowing, headache. - dryness. No ) struggling for. breath at night j your cold or'catarrh will 'be gOhe..' Get a small, bottle of. Ely's Oreara Balm from your druggist now.' An- j ply m little Of thies fragrant? an tiseptic, healing cream in-your .nos trils.- lt penetrates through every I air passago of tho. head soothes the ? Inflamed or swollen mucous membrane | and relief comes-Instantly. Ifs Just fine. Don't atay stuffed up I I with, a cold or no.sty catarrh-relief | comos so quickly. What io give is the question at Christmas time and Evans' Phar macy is the store to answer it, and answer it to the perfect satisfac tion of all concerned. Shop Early, else what you wish to give may be gone when you get here. While our stocks are very complete, they have their limitations, hence: "Shop Early!" Waterman Fountain Pen Here is a gift for Man, Boy, Girl or Woman. The fountain pen is in such universal use to day, that it ranks with the most popular gifts pt all. And, of course you prefer the Water man. Combs We have an excellent line of combs in all sizes, grades and kinds. We can suit yo?r taste and purse at thc same time; Brushes Hair Brushes, Military Brush es, Clothes Brushes, in fact every sort of brush is here for your selection. There is hardly another article in house hold use that is used as much as a brush, hence the recipient of a brush will be pleasantly reminded daily of the giver. Dollar Watches Your boy, or girl either, for that matter, would be delighted with one of our "Rexall" dol lar watches? They are well worth what we ask and more, too. They ar;; Guaranteed'for a jears time. They give .ser vice, usually, for a Ibhger period than that. Safety Razors Today, there are live times as many safety razors used as there are of the old style razors. If you are at a loss for what to give "him," give him a Safety Razor, You'll hit the nail on'the head, exactly, if he hasn't one. Collar Bags No gentleman can well do without a collar bag. lt hangs, or rests on the top of his dress er where it is always conven ient, and it keeps his collars free from dirt and dust. It. is an indispensable adjunct to a gentleman's Wardrobe. Thermos Bottles This wonderful invention keeps liquids either hot or cold, according to your wish. It is f one of the : most convenient articles to have in the house, on a trip into.the country or on the train, ii js invaluable for keeping baby's milk either hot nr cold, just as the mother wistes. ' - . '-'i; ._:_._ Soap Boxes This is aqs unusual gift; yet it is one that, will be appreciat ed, . especially-^; J>x&f?e 'who boards, or \wto .|rfry??s., .We have some ver> pretty > nes at prices to suit. . Here is something that every cigarette smoker always wants; especially if if iv a handsome orte, and one thal holds his cig arettes so that; . they do not mash or crumple up. Those we have are th. v very best made, and we have some sne? dally pretty ones, loo. Candy rpHANKSGIVING without turkey ?* and Christmas without Huyler's would be like Shakespeare's Hamlet with Hamlet left out. So don't try to play an ahbreviated Hamlet this Xmas. We've received a THOUSAND POUNDS of Huyler's di rect from New York by express for the Holidays, so if you care for "her" you won't allow her to be left out, nor will you try to substitute, some inferior candy. You may not think "she" knows the difference, but if she's the "class" that we think she is, she knows the difference and will set ' you dov/n as a "cheap skate" if your box doesn't bear the standard of Place your orders NOW! .We will deliver at whatever MINUTE you say. The always welcome gift A Kodak ' The gift that keeps the picture story of ovory youthful interest School days and sports, the wln . ter and summer outings, the city boy's trip to tho country and thc country boy's trip to the city. In ull these there ls fun in the pic ture taking and afterwards both fun and satisfaction in possession. V hm Oar Christmas ?tods of Kodaks and Brownies b particularly complete. Hat us ahow you. ^^^^^^^ Cigars Have you ever, unobserved, watched a gentleman smoke his after dinner cigar? Doesn't he enjoy every whif of it? He does! Now, if "He" smokes, give him a box of his favorite cigars. We carry a very large rrf *u <.. ..?J.. rlff'arc ?lill. <JI HIV, ?Ll.i 1'l.Jl Lit, ll I O sold, and the chances are that we know the exact brand that he prefers. Drop in, and let us advise you about it. Brass Goods We are showing a beautiful line cf brass jardinieres, brass fern dishes, and ash trays, etc., that have already attracted considerable favorable atten tion. These make useful and pretty Xmas presents, too. They are not at all expensive. Mesh Bags No lady ever had too many purses, hand bags, or mesh bags; and as the mesh bags are the very thing just now, you could not go wrong in giving one to a lady or young girl. We have, them at very moder ate prices, and some a little more expensive. -?-;-!-?-j Pocket Books Pocket books are used daily by men and women, and they serve to reminu one . of the donor for months and month's to come. We have a nice showing of pocket books in a great array of different styles. Handkerchief Cases Here is a very useful; as well as ornamental present' that will lie prized highly :vby" either a lady, or gentleman. We have some very pretty ? ones, and their price is not at all high. Card????8 Styles in '.ard cases change every year or so, and while you may think that your wife, daughter or sweetheart has a card cas?, the chances are that they would like very much to have another. l.?ok^these over! Chalices are that we've got what "she" Wants. ' '. .Stationery' \$MM Our showing of nice quality paper, envelopes, correspond ence'cards, etc., is as good or petter than shown elsewhere in the city. We have beautiful Holiday boxes of nice station ery at ,vcry reasonable prices. \Hand Painted China No lady cari resist ; th? beau-, ty'arid elegance of hand paint ed/ china. We lia ve some beau .ttful; pieces, and they, serve to remind the recipient of ypii for. .years to come.: Priced . veTy reasonable. Cut Glass Dishes We /have some cut glass dishes that would dsUghbany ; Housekeeper,' ?nd add' dazzling .beauty and elegance (o\.any. dining table. V'She'* .would :be delighted- with on^-fe?ttt?s? ' pieces of cut . glas*.; and we won't take -your bank; roil, either. I 1-4