Historical Newspapers of South Carolina

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| SMILES A Limited Journey. Ed?"Ho seems to be wanderi in his mind." Fred?"Well, he can't stray far". Paradoxical Infection. "I think it very queer the water j my place made you folks si'ck." "Why so?" "Because it is well water."?B; timore American. Co Easy! Two things break gently, We earnestly beg? Bad news to a friend, And an over-ripe egg. ?Memphis Commercial Appeal. Distressing. Dear Sweet Thing?"Aren't y u feeling well?" Steady?"No; I ate German nooc soup and French fried potatoes f supper, and thev won't arbitrate. Translated for the Cook. Customer?"Here, waiter! Who are the olives? Hold on! Bring i k half a melon and some cracked ic< Waiter (loudly)?"Dumdums, h{ a bombshell and a bowl of shrapne Devotion. (Philadelphia Public Ledger) She?Would you leave your hoi r for me? He?I'd leave a baseball game the ninth inning with the score tie. A Real Smart Alec. (Woman's Home Companion) "What are the two sexes. Alec asked the teacher. "Masculine and feline," answer Alec. In Excellent Form. (Buffalo Express) "My boy, I must congratulate y on your consistency." "Thank you, sir, I?er?" <<i WUIIVCU IICIC 111! weeks and you haven't done anythii right yet." Friend in Need. The ferret-eyed little man stepp across the street car aisle and whi pered into the oar of the tall eh: in a gray suit: "You'd better wipe that bit of ei r off your chin. The income tax m; is just two seats in front of you." One of the Three. Susie's grandmother had been scol i. .g her. Susie felt indignant, b had been taught never to "answ back." However, she got even. Ta ing her kitten in her arms, she th soliloquized: "Kitty, I wish one of us was de: this minute. Not you kitty, nor n kitty, but one of us throe in tl .room." Stingy. (Kansas City Post) Mrs. Gordon was spending sor time at Palm Beach, and durinpr h stay she wrote her husband, sayiP "Dear Will: I enclose the hotel bil Will wrote back: "I enclose t check, but please don't buy any mo I hotels at this price. They are ro , binpr you." I . Patient Search. (New Orleans States) A man entered the cloak room the end of a banquet and becran smash in silk hat after silk hat. "Hold on, boss! Wot fo' > amashen' all dem high hats?" d inanded the attendant. "I'm lookiner for mv own," the pre teman answered. "It's an opera h ?collapsible, you know. None these seem to be it." His Only Chance. "Why do you carry that umbrell little boy?" asked th" passer-by c riously. "It's not raininp: and t sun is not shininf." "I know," said the youth, "h when it rains Pa wants it and wh the sun shines Ma wrtnts it. and tl is ine oniy Kincia weainer i can f ter use it at all." Interested Advice. "I am bothered" he said: "I es marry a wealthy widow whom I dot love or a noor prirl that I do love i tensely. What shall T do?" "Listen to your heart," advised V eemrmnion, "and marry the one yi love." "You are ritrht my friend. I shs mfiTv the pirl." "Then can vou erb'e me the wi ow's address?"?London Opinion. Pat's Precaution. During the nrenaration for hatt Pat emercred from his tent weani his uniform hind sid" before. TV soon attracted the attention of - h superior officer, who demanded an e planation. Pat scratched his head and seem oath to comply, hut finalv renlic with a sheepish prrin: "Well heerorr Oi wore it this way. thin when 1 had to retrnte Oi wouldn't pet sh in the back."?Life. The Tost Supremo. "You say that women haven't tl endurance of men?" "Thev haven't." "That they cannot successfully r sist unusual mental strain, or phy> cal fatigue?that they lack nerve ai patience and endurance!" "Yes." "Do you see that little woman ov there?" "Yes." "You have never known a man wl could endure what she has endured "Eh! Why what is she?" "She's the reader of the love st ries submitted to a popular mag zine."?Cleveland Plain Dealer. L -1 -N DEATH CALLS I CAPT. CHAS. PETTY Was Veteran Newspaper Man, a Confederate Soldier, Member of ng Famous Wallace House and a Christian Gentleman. y died at his home at Spartanburg Tuesday morning of last week after on an illness of less than a fortnight. Though extremely weak from the infirmities of old age, Captain Petty f,\. was conscious until the last and during the early hours of this morning he conversed with his loved ones about the bed. I)e?th was due to a general physical breakdown, though, a few days ago he fell and suffered a shock, which probably hastened the end. Five weeks ago he celebrated his 80th birthday. The funeral services will be held ou from the late residence some time tomorrow, the hour and more complete lie arrangements to be announced later, or Confederate Veteran. " Charles Petty was born January 16, 1835 on the farm of his father, James Petty, two miles west of Gaffney. re Hi's father was from Orange county, ne Virginia. His mother was Ruth Cannon, sister of the late Gabriel Cannon ilf When a young man he began teach1." ing in the Spartanburg Female College and in 1859 married Julia Davis, of Wilkinsville, then in Union county. n1 Shortly after "The Star of the West" was fired a call was made for in a certain number of companies. Seva eral in this county were organized. One was known as Company C. 13th. S. C. V. Of this company, Charles Petty was a member, T. Stobo Farrow was captain. D. R. Duncan, J. W. ?" Carlisle and A. S. Douglas were lieutenants. When the regiment wa-ed organized, Capt. Farrow was elected major, D. R. Duncan was promote! to captain and Charles Petty was elected lieutenant. Those four officers went through the entire war tcou gether, neither being seriously wounded. Lieutenant Petty was with nis rege< iment during the several days around ng Richmond and was engaged in the battles of Gaines' Mill and Cold Harbor. He was with the Confederate army in its advance up the Rappaed hannock river and was with Gen is- Jackson in his great movement t~ ap Manassas Junction in the rear of Gen. Pope's armv. Tie was in the hat;r ties of Fredericksburg. Chancellorsan ville, Gettysburg. Falling Waters Nine Run. Wilderness, Snottsvlvanr> rY>nrt House. Jerico Ford, Second Cold Harbor, Riddle's Shon. attack a* d- Petersburg in front of line. Dee" u+ Bottom, Fussell's Mill, after which he er was in all the battles and marche*" k- in which his regiment was engaged us until the surrender at Appomattox Court House, ad Member Wallace House ie After the war Capt. P?tty farmed lis at Wilkinsville until 1372. when h" became the head of Limestone Female college at Gnffney. then in Soar tanburg countv. In the memorable eemnaie-n of 1S7R he was elected t" ne rV|e legislature from this countv and ot became a member of the histori" g' Wallace house. During the trying I " .1 #. ..r. I.,.*. ?"r? Kfi ni'T * wmiKt i "'i, vvrun tii^ uci. he ocrats and the republicans for th? r" control of the state eovernment, he b- took a prominent part. He wrote some spirited letters to President Rutherford B. Haves, in whieh he told th~ president that unless Wade Hnmnto" was recognized as governor of Soutb at Carolina. there would be another wa?* to President Hayes replying in his own handwriting assured Captain Pettv '?' that Governor Hamnton would be le- >-eeognizod. These letters are stil1 fn possession of the family?Spartan" burg Journal. at ? of Foresee Sky Battle. A battle in the clouds between the norifil flontc nf tho HorrnQn nnd In allies may take place at any time n- and the Germans will he beaten, ir he the opinion of Glenn H. Curtis, of Hammandsport, N. Y., manufacturer ut of aeroplanes and himself an aviator eti Mr. Curtiss has been watching re lie ports from the war zone in Europe fit regarding the aviation operations, and has had many private reports of these operations. "It is generally understood among an aeroplane experts that the Germans 1't xire preparing to make an aeroplane n- raid on the English coast and that the English reinforced, perhaps by lis the French, will rise to meet them," Bu fc'.id Mr. Curtiss. "I can see only one result of such a fight?the defeat all of the Germans. I believe this will be the case, because the English aerod nlanes are most efficient in every respect than those of the Germans. They are faster, better constructed and can rise to greater heights 1? Thus far in the war the German* I" bivi suffered far more in the ai>battes than have the allies. But it li" seems certain that there will be r x? decisive battle in the air befor? long. ed "This war has demonstrated the 'd utility of the aeroplane in war, and !?"x moved that it is sunerior to the i'' (lirigme or /.eppeiin. i ne /.eppeiin ot Hmdoubtedly would have been a gr"at menace to England and France had it not been for the aeroplane. "One striking feature of the war he has been that the aeroplane corp.-. has been found to be the safest branch of the service. This is easily e- accounted, as I view it, for the very d- good reason that aeroplanes, when ad out for business are not dangerous It is only when aviators are joy riding that thev become dangerous.? er Washington Post. One kind of a danger signal is the [}q kick a woman gives her husband unI ?? der the table when there is company for dinner, o- Man seldom becomes a political a- insurgent until his term of office has expired. QUESTS ENJOYED A Presence of Monkeys at Format Meaner by Mrs. Longworth Made a Decided "Hit." It hnppened that Mrs. Nicholas Longworth, tho daughter of former President Roosevelt, and -wife of the distinguished Ohio representative, had presented to her among many hundred other gifts, two little monkeys. who lost no time in sustaining their reputation for mischievous antics, and kept the Longworth household In a panic as to what was going to happen next. They were too nimble and quick to be punished for the evil of their ways, and so, week in and week out tho monkeys had a lovely time of it. When Mr. and Mrs. Longworth entertained. the little creatures were shut up behind lock and key, and usually wore themselves out in their effort to break through, and went to sleep in consequence, from sheer exhaustion. This had always insured the success of a party, without any disturbing interruptions, until one fateful night when Mrs. Longworth looked up to discover a monkey grinning at her from the top of a picture. It was only a second until the other one climbed up the corner of the cloth, and snatched a few nuts from some of the panic-stricken guests. His partner in crime leaped from the picture and perched himself upon the shoulder of a guest, and the details < of what followed are not laid down In the directions given to polite society as how to entertain. "Hut," laughed a guest not long ago, "I shall never forget how utterly funny it was, nor how we all enjoyed it, just as soon as we were asured the monkeys would not eat us." | WAR NEWS FROM KANSAS Up to 1 A. M. tho Situation in Jenks' Home Was Reported as Remaining Unchanged. The battlo at Short Jenks' home continues unabated, says the Atchison Globe. At eleven o'clock this morning Mrs. Jenks made the following official announcement: "With a brilliant charge about breakfast time I flanked my husband with my stalwart foot and ha doubled up and then retreated in haste. It was almost a rout." At one o'clock this morning Mr. .looks officially announced: "The situation remains unchanged. There have been attacks and counter-attacks on both sides, with no decisive results. I'm now well intrenched and confident behind a tub in the cellar. I believe I will ultimately triumph. The enemy is making many claims, and making those things is the easiest thing in the world to do. If she had a cannon that was as rapid as her mouth I would be compelled to admit that my position is serious. At is It, I concede nothing. I will conserve my strength and forces, with the view of getting out of the cellar and consulting a lawyer. I urge American newspapers to judge not until the real situation is known. History will vindicate me and declare that I did not start hostili- ! ties. My sister-in-law urged my wife < to start them. My wife didn't need a great deal of urging." Off to the Front. A theatrical woman went into a Itroadway drug store and leaned upon the show case. A druc rilsnensor vanced precipitately and stood smiling expectantly before her. "Have you got any smokeless powder?" inquired the woman sternly. The young man backed off in fear that the war news from the other side had unsettled the woman's mental balance. "Smokeless powder?" he gasped. "No, madam, we haven't any. You will have to go to a gun store for that." "You haven't got any then?" she persisted, piercing him with her deep, dark eyes "No, ma'am," he said, all of a tremble by now. "What do you call that in that box in the show case?" she asked, pointing at the article in question. "That's ordinary face powder, lady," he explained freely "Well, that's smokeless, isn't it?" she said with a silvery laugh, and the drug dispenser was nearly overcome by the reaction. Joffre's Nickname. In a note on General Joffre, Ixindon Truth says: "A man of bourgeois ' family, very much the soldier, very ' much the mathematician, very much J tno man or action, and quite us much < the man of thought, liis faintly belongs to tho eastern Pyrenees. An auctioneer founded it about a hundred years ago. This ancestor went 1 from village to village in a showman's van laden with goods. They were ' trumpeted by him as bargains, 'J'offro 1 such or such an article at such and 1 such a price!' ho cried, when he drew ' up in the mayoralty square or market- ' place of burg or village. IIo began at ' a high figure and went down gradual- j ly. His Catalan name proclaimed him ( a foreigner, and he adopted the nickname county folk had given him of JofTre?le pore Joffre." < Germany's Sources of Wealth. , In 1912 Germany produced a min- ] eral output of $592,250,000 in coal, llg- . nite, iron, zinc, lead, copper, rock salt and potassic salt. Her foundry products that year were: Pig iron, $212,- \ 627,750; zinc. $28,589,750; lead. $11,. 038,000; copper, $11,003,500; tin. $8,- < 874,000. Two years ago the fisheries | of Germany yielded $108,916,990. i J ??frTHESE ( Winter Mornings a cup of pood, health-giving coffee sets you right for the day's work. Not how cheap, but how pood is the question. Buy a pound of Luzianne and you have the equal of 2 pounds of barrel coffe. Besides that, Luzianne is clean, healthy and fragrant when you open the can. Who knows but what the store cat slept in the barrel or bag the nipht before you pot your supply of loose coffee? IF CHILI) IS CROSS, FEVERISH ANI) SICK Look, Mother! If tonpue is coated, cleanse little bowels with "California Syrup of Figs." <iildren love this "fruit laxative," and nothing else cleanses the tender stomach, liver and bowels so nicely. A child simply will not stop playing to empty the bowels, and the result is, they become tightly clogged with waste, liver gets sluggish, stomach sours, then your little one becomes cross, lialf-sick, feverish, don't eat, sleep or act naturally, breath is bad, system full of cold, has sore throat, stomach-ache or diarrhoa. Listen, Mother! See if tongue is coated, then give a teaspoonful of "California Syrup of Figs," and in a few hours all the constipated waste, sour bile and undigested food passes out of the system, and you have a well playful child again. Millions of mothers give "California Syrup of Figs" because it is Der fectly harmless; children love it, and it never fails to act on the stomach, liver and bowels. Ask your druggist for a 50-cent bottle of "California Syrup of Figs," which has full directions for babies, children of all ages and for grown ups, plainly printed on the bottles. Beware of counterfeits sold here. Get the genuine, made by "California ? Fig Syrup Company." Infuse any other kind with contemnt. Receiver is asked for L. I. Potato. Good job for N. Y. Consumer. rhe Quinine That Does Not Affect The Head liecnusc of its tonic ami laxative effect, LAX A1*1 VK UROMO QtTININK is better than ordinary Jtiinine and does not cause nervousness nor inning in head. Remember the full nfltue and cok for the signature of K. W. GROVl.%. Latinized. Jack returned home from college, where he had won high honors as a student of ancient languages, hut he pleaded ignorance one day when his young sister asked hi'm to translate a sign she had seen of an optician which read thus: "Con sulto saho utyo urey es." Jack struggled manfully with it for several minutes and gave it up. "It isn't good Latin," he said. "There are some words in it that are Latin. The others aren't anyhow. It doesn't make sense." "That is what I said," replied the sister; "but cook translates it without any trouble. She says it means: Consult us about your eyes.'"?Tid Hits. _ Piles Cured in 6 to 14 Days Your d'uggist will refund money if VA7.0 OINTMENT fails to cure any case of Itching Illinil, Weeding or Protruding Piles in 6 to 14 days. Tin ;.r?l ' - n ?,:vcs Ease and Rett. 60c. Dwindling. (Boston Transcript) "Pa, a man's wife is his better half, isn't she?" "We are told so, my son." "Then if a man marries twice there isn't anything left of him, is there?" _ Invigorating to the Pale and Sickly The Old Standard general strengthening tonic, ..ROVK S TASTEI.KSS chill TONIC, drives out Ma Pit in.em iclies the blood .and buildsupthesvs.cm. A It ue tome. For adults ami childreu. 50c Atlanta's Dry Sunday. Atlanta, Ga., March 1.?Atlanta * today is recovering from her first f really dry Sunday in several yea,-s, und the early morning attendance at c the clubs was notablv larire. But the A men who must have tneir Sunday toddy did not suffer if they had fore- ' thought, for Chief Heavers' warning ? enabled them to carry home a package Saturday night. Some carried their package in bottles and some in- a ternally. The chief sprung a surprise by dig- n tring up an old state statute against f tippling on Sunday, instructed the ehief of detectives to have plain (, Mothes men watch the clubs and y make cases where any drinks were ' served, dispensed, sold or given away. Under Carranza's land plat, cacb ( Mexican is entitled to six feet. iuree Old Sores, Other Remedies Won't Cure. \ Che wool case*, no matter of how long utitnding, ire cured by the wonderful, old reliable Pr. 1 Porter'* Antiseptic Healing Oil. It relie*ea a Pain and Heala at the eamc time. 25c, 50c. $1-00 li ^4,4, + + 4'4,4,4'4'4,4'4,4,4,4,4''f4'4,4,4,,4' + + Xl . ! You Can Pay a BiU 11 * " * \ ji # j. j X Without the trouble of making change. + [ 4+ 4* ( + Always have a receipt for each and 4* every transaction. 4? f X Carry on large or small transaction ^ 1 <4* without the exchange of any cash. * ' * Feel that your business o^rations ^ ; ^ are on a dignified basis. 4. 4* All this by simply carrying an acJ count at this Bank and then pay all bills X ^ by checks. , ' +?? * v ; * ; | CITIZENS NATIONAL BANK | X K. P. Morgan, PresidentC. C. Sanders, Cashier ^ -|f Capital and Surplus $135,000.00 4. 4* X | 1 ^ 4<* 4*1 4* 4* 4* 4* 4* 4* 4* 4* 4* 4* 4* 4* 4* 4* 4* 4* 4* 4* 4* 4* 4* 4 j mmhmhvmbbmbhrqivimvi:' . ^ ^J?WWB?BB?WBW 1 n ??? ??? ill in 'IM - i ' ] v ;!|! I BUYERS TO SHARE IN PROFITS J i ji LOWER PRICES ON FORI) CARS !S ? ; . I Effective from Aug. 1, 1911 to Aug. 1, 1915 and guaran- l! ! teed against reduction during that time: jj Touring Car $190 . ! Runabout 440 1 'town Car 090 i B I f | r! (F. <) H Detroit, all cars fully equipped. I j ii 4 in the United States of America only.) Ilk A Further, we will he able to obtain the maximum efficiency I . D w 1 in our factory production, and the minimum cost in our I IB A 1 purchasing and sales departments if we can reach an out- fl jfc J j put of auu.OuO cars between the above dates. |2 And should we reach this production, we agree to pay as la 1 the buyer's share from *>40 to *00 per car (o.. or abqut || T August 1, 1915) to every retail buyer who purchases a jg . new Ford car between Aug. 1, 1914 and Aug. 1, 1915. i ij | For further particulars regarding these low prices and | J profit-sharing plan, see the nearest Ford Branch or Dealer t UN 1O N GARAGE ! Ij ' "HOME AT LAST." GADBERRY ST. 5 i I J | \\ j - : Telephones on JS^el Farms at ' ByS Low Ifer Rates: r If there is no telephone on your farm write for our Free Booklet telling how you may get Service at 5 0 cents per month and up. A postal will do! Address:Farmers* Line Department. SOUTHERN BELL TELEPHONE AND TELEGRAPH COMPANY dJikjj Nsjfr,)4rtp low To Give Quinine To Children. Whenever You Need n General Tonic 'RBRILTNR is tke trade-mark name (riven to no ^ ? niproved Quinine. it is a Tasteless Syrup, ptea*- The Ola Standard Groves Tasteless tit to take and dots not disturb the stomach, chill Tonic is equally valuable as a hitdren take it and never know it is Quinine. n~rtor?i Tnnio .1. . Iso especially adapted to adults who cannot H . lontc^ because contains t.u ike ordinary. Quinine. Does not nauseate tiot Well known tonic propertiesof QUININK anse nervousness nor ringing in the head. Try and TROM Is ^ ' ?viav.i iuv j-rfivcr, unvcs /;::n?';V,?r;,::n;,x;;'y k ??< ??'?''? <>>e biw ??,I arne pkbriuni{is t.iowumbottle. 25 certs. Builds up the Whole bystetu. 50 cents. Kokomo visitor calls New York Dryer New Jersey is qn Sunday sight. So's Kokomo. the wetter it is in New York. Ohio congressman's bill asking Slingsby heir wins $500,000 by an i lore wooden legs, should include ear. Heats losing it by a nose. j ewer wooden heads. Kentucky women sell votes' at $1 '( Dr. Wiley says we devote (50 per each. Another argument for suf- U ent to eating. And 100 per cent to frage. S aying for what we eat. 1 I SJ^CHESTERSPILLS j??1?ESS, Neuralgia, Headaches, Cramps, 'j iui V.?,!? Colic, Sprains, Bruises, Cuts and R Burns, Old Sores, Stings of Insects Ifc B "fu Etc. Antiseptic Anodyne, Wsed in- j <?r SOiP BYDRtiGGIST^ EVERYWHERE ternally and externally. Pfice 25c. ]