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FOOTER BUn/DINO, UNION, 9- <?.1
ddHHMu ,} k mJm
[I I
Under the
R^ose
By FREDERIC 5. 1SHAM.
! Author of "The Strollers"
Copyright, 1903. by the Dowea-MnriH Coapuy
gv.IH? lie Is silent. He cannot apeak."
And indeed tlie foreign Jester seemed
momentarily disconeortcd. although
he strove to appear indifferent.
"A presumptuous knave." muttered
Francis darkly. "He saved his neck
once by a trick."
"Oh, the duke would not mind now If
you wore to hang hitn. sire!" answered
Trlboulet blithely.
"True," smiled the king. "The question
of breach of hospitality might not
occur. Whet have you to say, fool?"
lie continued, turning to the object of
the buffoon's Insidious and malicious
attack.
"Laugh." whispered Jacqueline, furtively
pressing the arm of the duke's
fool. "Laugh or"?
The touch nud her words appeared to
arouse him from his lethargy, and the
Jester arose, but not before the princess,
with tlamlng cheeks, hut proud
bearing, had cast a quick glance In hie
direction, a glance linlf appealing, half
resentful. Idly the Joeuiatrlx regarded
him, her hand9 upon the table playing
with the glasses, lier lips faintly
repeating the words of roundelay:
I "For love In madness;
While madness rules
Fools In love
Remain but fools!
I Sing ho?ldy doddy.
Noddy!
Remain but fools!"
With the eyes of the company upon
hiin the duke's fool Impassively studied
the carven figure on his stlek. If
lie felt fear of the king's anger, the resentment
of his nisister or the malice of
the dwarf his countenance now dkl not
betray It. lie had seemed about to
speak, but did not.
"Well, rascal, well?" called out the
king. "Do you think your wand will
save you. sirrah?" lie added InipatJent^ly.
"Why not. sire?" tranquilly answered
the jester.
The duke's fare grew more and more
ominous. S'ill the fool, looking up. did
not quail, but met his master's glance
freely, and those who observed noted
It was the duke who first turned away,
although Ids jaw was set (ind his great
fist clinched. Swiftly tli$ Jester's gaze
again sought the princess.?but slit* bad
plucked a spray of blossom .frqpi the
table uml ttimi holding it to pier lips,
mindlessly lilting the fragrant jfeaves,
and those who followed tbq fool's
gluuce saw In her but n picture of
languid unconcern such as became a
kinswoman of the king. . *
I Almost imperceptibly the brow of the
plalsnut clouded, but recovering himself.
la? confronted the king with, nn
enigmatic smile.
I "Why notV" lie repeated. <MIn the
court of love Is not the fool's wand
greater than ti king's miter' or tb*
a pnsiorai staff of the Abbe de l?*s? Hesides,
sire," he added quickly, "as a
fool takes it, in the court of love, not
' to love?Is treason!"
' "Good!" murmured the bislmp, still
eating. "Not to love Is treason!"
"Who alone Is the culprit? Whose
heart alone is filled with umbrage,
hatred, pique?"
"Triboulet! Trlboulet, the-traitor!"
suddenly cried the countess, sprightly
as a child.
"Yes; Trlboulet, the traitor!" exclaimed
the fool, pointing the wand of
?- folly at the hunchback.
Even Francis' offended face relaxed.
|j "Positively, I shall never bang this
i fellow," he snid grimly to Marguerite.
/ "Before this tribunal of ladies whose
)| beauty and learning lie has outraged
v by his disaffection and spleen I sumI
inon him for trial," continued the
| duke's jester.
) "Triboulet, arise! Illustrious ladies
* of the court of love, the offender is in
? your hands."
. "A little monster!" spoke up Diane,
1 with n gesture of aversion, real or ati
fee tod.
"He Is certainly somewhat reprebeu,
sible," added the queen of Navarre,
( whose tender heart even inclined to
| the weaker side.
"An unconscionable rogue," mur)
mured the bishop, complacently claspi
lug his fat fingers before lilm.
"So be is already tried by the church
j and the tribunal," went on the plaisant
] of the duke. "The church hatb excom>
uiunicnted him and the court of love"?
"Will banish lilm!" exclaimed the
j countess mirthfully, regardiug the captious
monarch with mock defiance.
- "Yes, banish him, turn him out," echoed
Catharine carelessly.
"But, your majesty!" remonstrated
the alarmed Trlboulet, turning to the
monarch, whose fovor he had that day
D enjoyed.
"ADDCal not to me!" r??nr??rl TTrnn
els sternly. "Ilerc Venus rules!" And
' 1 he gallantly inclined to tlie countess.
"Venus nt whom he scoffs!" broke In
Jacqueline shrilly, leaning back In her
chulr, with her hands on ber hips.
"You witch, you sorceress! It was
rs you who"? he hissed, with venomous
glance.
"Ilenr hlni!" exclaimed the girl lightly.
"IIo calls mo witch, sorceress, because,
forsooth, I am a woman!"
"A woman, a rtovll!" muttered Trihoulct
between his closed teeth.
. "And now," she cried, rising IropetuK
ously, "be says that women are devils!
What shall we do with blrn?"
"Felt him out!" answered the count2
ess. Felt bim out!"
With peals of merriment and triumphant
sbonts the court of one accord
directed a fusillade of fruits, nuts arid
the raging and hapless buffoon, the
counters herself, apple In hand?Eve
l>eut upon vengeance?leading In the
assault. The other tobies responded
with a cross Are. and heavier articles
succeeded lighter until after having
endured the continuous nttack for a
few moments as best he might the unlucky
dwarf raised his arms above his
head aud fairly fled from the hall,
leaving behind In his haste n bagpipe
and his wooden aword.
"I suppose," whispered Jacqueline to
the duke's fool, when the attention of
the company was thus withdrawn from
the Jester's end of the table, "you
think yourself In fine favor now?"
"Yes." he answered Hbsently; "thanks
to your suggestion." i
"My suggestion r* she repeated scornfully.
"I gave yon none."
"Well. then, your crossing Trlboulef."
"Oh. tlint." she replied, picking at a i
bunch of grapes, "was to defend roy
sex. not you."
"Hut your warning for me to laugh?"
"Why," she returned demurely, i
" 'twns to see you go more galluntly i
to your execution. And"?eating a
grape?"that Is reasonably certain to i
be your fate. You've only made a few i
enemies tonight?the duke?the"?
"Name them not, fair Jacqueline,"
he retorted. Indifferent.
"True. You'll soon learu for yourself,"
she answered sharply. "1 think I
should prefer to be In Trlboule^'s place |
to yours nt present." \
"Why." he said, with a strange <
laugh, "there's a day for the duke nnd (
a dny for the fool." i
"Why did you not answer them with ]
what was first in your mind?" stac ask- \
ed. I
"What was that?" ho said, starting. ]
"How can I tell?" she returned, \
studying him.
"Y'ou con tell a great deal," he re- ]
plied. (
"Sing hoddy doddy.
Noddy!
The duke and the fool"?
alic hummed, deigning no further J
worus. |
i
[TO Ml CONTINUED.] 1
SUCH A RUDE FELLQ^. ]
From out an alley dark nnd still
Comes forth the holdup man
To take your twenty dollar bill
Or whut your purse will pan.
From his point sallies of that kind ,
Perhaps may be nil right,
Dut I must own that, to my mind, '
It Isn't qui to polite. I
I am not long on etiquette
Nor what may bo good form, I
How people In the better set
Should at all times perform, ,
And, while 1 haven't, it is true,
Seeured expert advice, (
1 must say, from my point of view, '
It isn't very nice. ,
,, lit fact, I think it mighty rude,
111 mannered and unkind I
I When fellows of that sort Intrude
Or snonk up from behind. "
When holdup men false faces don
And passersby are 1m zed
It seems a snd reflection on
The way that they were raised.
Running a Cigar Store.
Probably 110 man who uses the weed
ever lived wlio did not have a sneaking
notion tiiat be could make n howling
success running a cigar store.
He may know as much about buyiug
goods and keeping up stock as a lien ',
does about higher criticism, but still ,
lie thinks that If he were Installed be- I
bind a glass show case life would bo j
one sweet pipe dream. I
To the man who has never been there '
there Is a fascination about handing out
the fragrant smokers to devotees of the
weed who have the price while the sell- '
or is holding carelessly In his teeth
what is presumably one of the best In .
stock. ;
In nearly every Instance men go
through life with this groat longing to
run n cigar store unsatisfied, but occasionally
one trios it and is happy until
his little capita) is burned tip and tl*o
sheriff oouies around and politely informs
him that he is not in business
any more.
A Modern Instance.
f There was a man in
our town.
And he was wondrous
wise.
He Jumped Into a
bramble bush
And scratched out
both his eyes.
And when he found
his eyes were out
He had a happy noHe
Kot his eyes back |
TVith Doctor Boakem's
lotion.
(For sale at all drug
To Save Money.
.The Wife?Your honor, he locked me
iu the house and took the key.
The Judge?That looks like a case of
extreme cruelty.
The Husband?But there was a bargain
sale that day.
The Judge?Well, that is certainly an
extenuating circumstance.
Down His Way.
"It Is as cold ns July," said the
traveler, buttoning up bis coat.
"It Is, Is It?" said the hotel clerk who
was In 110 mood for sarcasm. "Say,
where were you raised?"
"South Africa." returned the traveler.
"I wish I was back there."
Fast Enough.
The mills of the gods run elowly,
Though doubtless It may seem
To one who's getting crushed that fhey
' A10 running at full steam.
Ca n good bluff a man can live for
several months. On a super^ bluff be
cas work bis way through life.
_ (
In the institutes for feeble minded
they also lead the simple life.
(
Walking is healthful exercise, bat If
a policeman la in pursuit running la
, much acre db. 1
The Ottke <* the Berber.
Id oldon days an Engliob noble entered
a barber shop, ami. upon Inquiring
for the master, was answered by na'
appremlre of fourteen that be was not
at home. "Do you shave, then?" asked
the duke. "Yes, sir, 1 always do," was
the reply. "But can you sbave without
cuttingV" "Yes, sir; 1*11 try." answered
the youth. "Very well," said the
duke, while seating himself and loadlug
bis pistol. "But, look here. If you
let any blood, as true as 1 sit here I'll
blow your brains out! Now, consider
well before yon begin."
After a moment's reflection the boy
begau to make ready and said, "I'm not
afraid of cutting you, sir," and In it
short time bad completed the feat without
a scratch, to the complete satisfaction
of the duke. In gentle touoi
bis grace asked. "Were you not afraid
of having your brains blown out when
you tnlght have cut ine so easily I" |
"No, sir; not at all. because I thought
that as soon as I should happen to let
any blood I would cut your throat be- j
Core you could have time to tire."
The reply won from the duke a hand
some reward. It need scarcely be added
be never resumed bis daugcrous
threats In a barber shop. A I?sson was
taught him for life.
Beck's Narrow Kacapc.
David Beck, the celebrated portrait
painter and pupil of Vandyke, while
traveling through Oermany was suddenly
taken 111 and to all appearances
died and was laid out n corpse. His
servants, sitting round the bed, grieved
heartily for the loss of so good a master,
and as grief is thirsty drank as
heartily at the same time. One of them,
becoming more befuddled than the rest,
then addressed bis companions thus;
"Our master when alive was fond of
bis glass. Let us out of gratitude,
then, give him one now he is dead."
Assent was given; the head of the dead
pnlntpr was raised up and some wine
;>ourod down or spilled about, the fragrance
or spirit of which caused Beck
ro open bis eyes, upon which the servint.
who, being drunk, half forgetting
ids master was dead, forced down the
remainder of the gloss. The painter
gradually revived and thus escaped a
living interment.
The Russian \ar?l Standard.
The Russian naval standard?a blue
Bag with u white cross?was adopted
by Peter the Great, who stayed for
some months nt Gaardnm, near Amsterdam,
working us a mechanic to
gain a knowledge of shipbuilding.
During this time be took a strong
fancy to a clever workman named
Cruys, whom he persuaded to return
with him to Russia after he bad revcalMl
to him his true name and position.
Cruys drew the pluns for the first
ahlps built for tbe Russian uavy, and.
to show bis appreciation, Peter the
Great made him uu adwlrap^nd gaye
orders that the Russian navy should
tlieuceforth have a special flag with
a white cross upon It to perpetuate th?
memory of his trusted associate, Cruys
being an old form of tbe Dutch word
for cross.
The Horn Dance.
Among the quaint old customs and
ceremonies still kcpt'idiye In English
country districts there Ur only one "horn
dance," and that Is tp.be found at Abbots
Bromley, in Staffordshire. Every
year at' the village wake the dance In
still carried out. Tbe origin of the
born dant^e is lost lu tbe mists of
history, but it has been traced back as
far as the eleventh -century. Until the
seventeenth century It was practiced at
Christmas, on New Year's day ami on
Twelfth day. In the time of Henry
VIII. tin* dance was performed in front
of tlio church every Sunday and n collection
for the poor taken up from the
spectators.
What Constitute* am Assault.
"It n man cornea Into yoor house,"
a a id the JJverpool stipendiary magistrate,
"and picks np a poker to strike
you, you are entitled to pick up the
tongs and fence with htm, nnd If you
hit him with the tongs he cannot complain
of being assaulted, because he
would have struck you first if he could.
But If, on the other hand, you take the
poker out of bis hand and strike him
with it you arc guilty of an assault,
because you struck an unarmed man.
That Is aa clear a distinction as I can
woke." _
A Psaar Metashor.
Judge John (Joode of Virginia, once
a member of the Confederate congress,
told of an attack by Foote of Tennessee
upon Jefferson Davis nnd General
Albert Sidney Johnston after the Confederate
defeat at Cloyd mountain. He
said that If Johnstpn bad fought aa be
ought to have fought "peace, like a
wedding garment, would now cover our
fair land."
All Leaked Oat.
"Of course," said the husband, who
made a specialty of manufacturing excuses,
"the truth Is bound to leak out
some time."
"Yes," rejoined the other half of the
matrimonial combine, "and I am Inclined
to believe that It leaked out of
rnn Inner ?rrn "
The America* Ankle.
Our transatlantic cousins hava certainly
cultivated to perfection the art
of looking dainty as they cross the
street. Somehow they always contrive
to look attractive while engaged
in this usually unbecoming actionsLondon
World.
Going to Extreme*.
The craze for old furniture has reached
such a height that Lord has
turned his wife out of doors to make
room for a Ixrais XVI. cabinet.?London
Truth.
There was no "precedent" for diaetv*
srlng America.?Hubbard.
! i i ii
A SoIcmb Daa??.
They bar? a singular kind of danc?
conducted on the greens of country villages
in llusfla. Tfae dnnccra stand
apart, a knot of young men here, a
knot of moklens there, each sex by itself
and silent ns a crowd of mutes. A
piper breaks into a tuuc; n youth puils
off bis cap and challenges his girl with
a ware and bow. If the girl Is willing, '
she waves her handkerchief in token of
nssent. The youth'advances, takes a
comer of the handkerchief iu his baud
and lends his lassie round and round.
No word is spoken and no laugh la
heard. Stiff with cords and rich with
braids, the girl mores hcarlly by herself,
going round and round and never
allowing her partner to touch her band.
The pipe goes droning on for hours In
the same sad key and measure, and
the prlr.e of merit In this "circling," as
the dance is called, is given by spectators
to the lassie who in all that summer
revelry lias never spoken and never
smiled.
A Widower'* Soacep(tbtlltjr.
A widower Is a taine animal and
stands without tying. No woman cau
scare lilm. He is ovcrcouQdent, und
that Is his great Weakness. He has
been through it all and is not to be
caught a second time. lie feels Impervious
to the approaches of woman 1?.
any form or guise. The widow finds
lilm really a rather knotty problem. He
prcseuts difficulties that are wholly absent
In a man who has never felt the
matrimonial halter draw. He looks upon
the widow with amused Indifference.
But a young and attractive woman
who has never been married quickly
arouses his sympathies. lie In nine
cases out of ten shows remarkable endurance
of her siege of his heart, and
we all know that it Is but a step from
endurance to pity and thence to embraces.
His doom Is quickly sealed.?
Washington I'ost,
Th? Simple Life ExpeaelTe.
And, reallyr the simple life Is frightfully
expensive. At n recent entertain- , J
mcnt in tills city n great luxury In tbe W
serving of tbe second supper wna tbe
introduction of country sausage and
buckwheat cakes with tnaple sirup. But
tbe sausage came from the farm of tbe
boat and represented n small fortune,
as the pigs from which tbe piece de resistance
was made were blooded animals
with pedigrees. The buckwheat
was grown In special fields which cost
ever so much u foot, nnd the maple sirup
was taken from trees in the most
expensive Adirondack preserve. And
thus con thousands of dollars l>e spent
on the simple life, while truffles, pate,
terrapin and such other rarebits of a
former generation are left for tbe tables
of the middle classes with moderate
means.?Town nnd Country.
Plet&re Im Dinars lae.
Many and ftrange have. beep the >
dssltodes of koine of the worhra greatest
pictures, and u fine painting which
now graces Lord Leigh's residence in
Warwickshire bus an Interesting history.
This remarkable picture, which
for some years consisted of a painting
of flowers, was pronounced by an art
dealer to tie merely a mask for some
other picture, nnd on his receiving permission
bo gradually cleaned off the
flowers, discovering underneath a very
fine portrait of Charles I., by Vandyke.
It ^supposed that the portrait was
thus-disguised in order to save it from
deetmctloh by the Itoundheads at the
time'of the mmmnna'Aiiltli
Where We Are I'ueleaa.
We are most particular about cleanlinens
in our houses?many servants
must keep them swept and garnish for
lis?nixl about cleanliness iu our food,
eating only of first class materials,
daintily prepared. But with all this
delicacy of habit the most greasy savage
Is seraph clean compared to us In ^
the matter of air. lie breathes puns
air rich in oxygen. We get together
in vast herds, defile the air with all
manner of disagreeable and revolting
matter, including disease germs, and
then contentedly breathe It.?Charlotte
Perkins Gllman In Good Housekeeping.
Doctors sad Ccllhscr.
There was once a time when doctors
were doomed to celibacy. It was at the
conclusion of the mediaeval period,
when medicine was in the hands of the
monks In Prance the habit of celibacy
persisted long after the practice of
medicine had passed Into lay hands.
For two or three centuries the doctors
protested, but In vain. The matter was
finally laid before the pope and toward
the end of the fifteenth century the
vow was abolished.
Two Point of View. ^
"I think," said au exasperated eld
deacon as be slowlv elevated himself
from the pavement to a perpendicular#
"the full grown man who thrown an
orange peel on the sidewalk la no *
Christian." "Well," said a bystander,
"what do you think of an orange peel
that throws a full grown man on the
sidewalk?" ..
JuUScS.
"I wish they'd Invent a new expression
occasionally," said Top as he perused
the account of a recent wedding.
"It's always "the blushing* bride."
"Well," replied Mrs. Top, "when you
consider wnat sort or husbands most
girls Lave to marry you can't wonder
at their blushing." *
After the Ceaaaltatlta.
"Well, Drs. Brown and Smith are f
going to operate upon old Ootrox."
"Is the operation necessary?"
"Why, yes; Brown has a note coming
due. and Smith wants an automobile."
?Puck.
The Leek.
"Say, waiter, this plate must bt
cracked; the table le wet" 'u
"No, sir- there's a leak In the soup."