The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, December 30, 1904, Image 3
I ? The Y
I I Holly
^ y Copyright. 1005. by G. ty
O Bat there was no need? tov fear. 1
Lola was brought up before the rnng- 1
istrates. and evidence was given as to
her excitable nature. The old sexton
produced the torn register and detailed
4*ow he had been assaulted. lie
thought the ludy was queer, himself.
Kowluski went into the box, also
IBawdsey and George. The result of
their evidence as to Lola's forelgu
ways was that the magistrate admonished
her and Inflicted a small fine.
This was triumphantly paid by.Kowlaskl,
who returned to town with his (
principal dancer under his jealous eye.
More than that, Kowlnskl rnado
quite a story out of tho events. It was i
knOwh !n London that Lola Velez'had
arrested, as all the jLondoo paper's
copied the account of .the trial
mKlMv I 1 - - * 1
_ nmvu nuu uppvurca in uie country (
& press. Kowlaskl put it about tbnt ,
S Lola had gone off her head owing to
f grief for her dying mother. Few peo- '
W pic believed this, but the public was
f M-* pleased to see the favorite again
that she was saluted with cheers. In j
* few days every one forgot about the
matter, which after all did not amount
to much.
Luckily it was uot stated why Lola
had wished to destroy the register.
^Tfcere were several marriage entries k
en the page, and no one could say \
which of these she wished obliterated.
' Besides, Brendon got the magistrate to
fltuppress the book and not let the press
'report the matter. He accomplished
a this by telling the magistrate exactly
f how the matter stood". Bo the Judicial
I 'authority useil his power, and the
. ffcurth estate quailed. Everything was
m ehttied in a most satisfactory manner.
V. Later on Brendon had copies made I
> ~ j - ef-tfce marriage entry of Fercy Vane,
' hSachelor, and Roslfta Lockwood, spinster,
and brought them to his grand- i
father. The old man read them care- i
fully, then laid down the paper with a
sigh of relief.
"I never thought 1 would be pleased
to see that in black and white," be
mtd, "but everything in life is strange. 1
and not the least strange thing is that
I' kick out Walter to make room for
you. By the way, George, he will be
here soon."
"Have you told him?"
?"?"Ye?rand he- wants to see you about
the matter. I said that he could lu
&T ' / my presence. What he has to say 1
jgT" don't know. There is another reason
for your remaining, George. Mrs.
1 Ward and her daughter are coming
?*;? nere." **
$ "Sho won't be pleased to see me,"
' Mid Brendon.
"Ob, I think she will. After Ireland
' put her in a corner she grew afraid,
and now she would like to see the
matter settled at any price. When
he Is your mother-in-law, Oeorge,
keep bier out of your bouse or there
will be trouble! Ah, here Is Walter!
. Well, my boy, have ypu come to see
your new cousin?"
Walter Vane entered the library with
an Injured air. He looked ntater and
more fragile than ever and wonderej
fully old, considering his years. Derf:
rlngton looked from him to the fine ,
V figure of George with a queer look in (
hie eyes.
"Walter," said George, "I hope you ]
bear me no grudge for stepping Into
your shoes." ,
Walter took the hand in his own limp
grasp. "Well, of course, It Is hard on '
, A I
"WaU4r, 1 hope you bear me no grudge." i
A fellow." he ?BSWere<i In a rathor 1
whining manner, "bat you and I got
on well together, ao I would rather It 1
wu you than another fellow. And
what about my Income?" asked Wal- '
tar. - '
"Ton will have what you have now," '
said Derrington. "Don't bother me <
about the matter. Teu and George 1
can settle It between you." 1
Considering how he had been ousted,
Walter really took things very calmly.
Bat he had not enough vigor to protest
He sighed. His grandfather had
cowed him, and Walter profoundly admired
his newly found, cousin, who did
not hesitate to stand up to the despot 1
He began to think It was a good thing
that George had come Into the family. 1
He would gt .least save him?Walter- 1
Areas constant bullying. Thin interest- i
1M ifttsmufttsd tap
el lew
By FERGUS HUME,
Author of "The Mystery of a
Hansom Cab," Etc. > *4
Dillingham Company
v- ^ ^ ^
Ll'.e entrance of Mrs. Ward, as pert and
?rotly as ever. She had quite recovsred
her spirits, and knowing that Her*
rinpton would say nothing about the
sard cheating or about the San Iteiuo
matter, she was prepared to be as insolent
as she dared. But she was quite
determined not to cross swords again
with the old man.
As it was, she came sailing in with
the prettiest air in the world and held
out both hands. "My dear Lord Derrlngton,
how well you are lookingl
How"? here her astonished eyes fell
on George. "You!" said Mrs. Ward,
aghast. "Mr. Brendoti, and here!"
"Not Mr. Brendon," said Derrlngton,
enjoying her confusion, "but my grandson,
George Vane."
Dorothj^who had remained below to
give some instructions to the footman,
entered the room just in time to hear
this announcement. She tlew to her
lover. "My dearest George, I am glad,
glad, so glad," and before them all she
kissed hi in. Afrs WnrU
"Dorothy! What manners!"
"Very* good manners," said Derrlngton
coolly, "seeing that they ure natural.
Well, Mrs. Ward, (Jeorge, uiy
grandson and heir." added the old man
with emphasis, "has something to say
to you."
"Iteally. 1 shall be most happy to
hear it."
George took his cue. "I have to ask
you for die hand of your daughter
Dorothy," he said.
"Really," said Mrs. Ward again, "I
don't know. I fancied that ,>yalter,
you see"? And she cast her eyes on
the neut little man.
"Oh, I scratch," said Walter, in his
elegant way. "There's no fighting
against George. lie has all the luck."
"You call hiin George?"
"Why shouldn't 1? He's my cousin,
the head of the house"?
"When I go to my long home," finished
Derrington. "Well, Mrs. Ward,
do you consent to the match?"
"Do, mother," said Dorothy imploringly.
Knowing what Derrington knew and
how obstinate both lovers were, Mrs.
Ward did not see very well what else
she could do. After a few sighs and
having squeezed n few tears she cried
to her daughter in a muilled voice expressive
of deep emotion, "Dorothy,
my dear child, do you love George?"
"Yes." said Dorntliv ulmrwiv "Va?
? *VU
know I love Lira."
"George, do you love my child?"
"I do," replied George curtly.
"It Is hard," said Mrs. Ward, with a
deep sigh, "to see a child leave its
parent. But you love her, you have
won her." Ilere she rose and, raising
Dorothy from her knees, gave lipr te
George. "Take her, George, and tfifh
her take a mother's blessing."
The Idea of Mrs. Ward's blessing
was too much for Walter, and he went
off into a shriek of laughter which
euded in his leaving the room. George
was quite unmoved. lie thanked Mrs.
Ward and "kissed Dorothy. Then he
took her to a distant seat near the
window, where they could talk sensibly.
Lord Herring ton was left to console
the alliicled mother. This he proceeded
to do immediately.
"Egad, you did it well," he said,
looking at the pretty woman. "I don't
believe Miss Terry or Mrs. Siddons
COUld have dnni> it hnltoi- "
Mrs. Ward saw that it was useless
to hide the truth from this keeu eyed
old uiau any longer. "Oh, dou't be
uusty," she said plaintively and rustled
up to hlin. "Of course I wuntcd
Dorothy to inurry Walter, but Georgo
does Just us well."
"Well," said Derrlngton, "you care
very little about Dorothy, and you
don't like George. When they are
inurrled you must stop away as much
qb is consistent with your feelings."
"I'll do what 1 like." said Mrs. Ward,
beginning to tup her foot.
"No; I don't think you will. You
threatened inc in this room."
"I was only playing a game," protested
Mrs. Ward.
"Well, I can play a game also. Mrs.
Jersey has left behind her a eonfession
In which she detulls how you inuuaged
to cbeut your sister, Miss Bull. If you
don't leave that couple severely alone
I shall show the confession to Dorothy."
"I never did anything to my sister.
Mrs. Jersey tells lies"?
Derrlngton made a gesture of disgust.
"There?there," he said, "what is
the use of talking further? Things ure
settled. When Dorothy and George are
married I'll see what I can do for you."
"Oh, thank you, dear Lord Derrlngton,"
she suld artlessly and pressing
bis arm. "I know you are the most
generous of men. But I really can't
stop talking here all day." Sbo rustled
over to Dorothy. "My darling, I must
go and do some shopping. No; you can
stay here. 1 will call again In an
t?our."
CHAPTER XXIV.
IT was the next day that George
went to see Ireland. At the door
he was informed that Ireland had
been very ill with his heart and
that the doctor hi.d been called in.
Nevertheless Ireland would not obey
the advice of his physician and stay In
Ded. He was up and dressed as usual
ind In his study,
ftma.int?ra4 th*. large won *J*4
Wfc. ?? CM???
^ DR. I. M
.DEN'
Crown and Bridge
Work a Specialty. .
saw his former guardian seated at his
desk a- usuui. The man looked very
ill. Ills large, placid face was extremely
p..lc, there were dark circles
under his eyes, und he even seemed
to have grown lean. Ills clothes hung
loosely on him, and he did not rise
when George entered.
"Excuse me, George," he said, with
an attempt at cheerfulness, "hut I am
not so well as 1 might he."
"You are looking ill?very ill," suid
George, taking his seat.
Irelnud nodded. "I can't live long,"
he remarked in his heavy voice. "So
the doctor informs me. My heart is
extremely weak. It's as bad as it well
can he. For the last few days I have
deviated sadly from my usual habits.
I have not taken a walk, and my system
of life is quite upset, it's the beginning
of the end." lie paused and
sighed. "You are looking well,
George."
"I have every reason to. Mrs. Ward
has consented to my marriage."
"With her daughter? How is that?"
"Well, tlio church where my parents
were married has been discovered.
The marriage has been proved beyond
a doubt. My grandfather has seen the
copy of the certificate and now holds
it."
"Is he pleased?"
"Very pleased. lie is now as friendly
toward me as he has been hitherto
hostile."
Ireland nodded, hreuthiug heavily.
"I thought he would be. He and 1 had
a long talk about you on the duy 1
called. That wus when I saw Mrs.
Ward and"?
"You eau go on," said George, seeing
his hesitation. "I know the whole
story."
"What story?" asked Ireland suspiciously*.
4 .
"The story of what happened at San
Ilcmo. Mrs. Ward I know was Violet
Howard, and lier sister Jenny Is Miss
Bull."
"Yes. Toor Jenny, she was the better
of the two, and now she drags out
a miserable life in a London lodging
house. While Violet, who is n bad
woman"?
"And the mother of Dorothy," interrupted
George imperiously. "Say no
more, sir."
"You are quite right. As I can't say
good of the woman, let me say no bad.
Well, you know how she loved your
father."
"1 think she flirted with him, but it
was Jenny who really loved."
"And look at her reward!" said Ireland,
with a deep sigh. "Those who
try to do their best always come off
worst. I loved your mother, George,
and 1 have been a lonely man all my
life."
It was a sad case. George wished to
get at the truth, but he was so sorry
for Ireland, who had passed so many
miserable years, that ho did not like
to inflict more pain. Nevertheless it'
was necessary to learn if Ireland had
really visited Mrs. Jersey on that night j
so as to set Bawdsey's mind at rest. If i
George did not learn the truth Bawd-'
sey might attempt the discovery, and
he would handle the old man in a
much worse manner than George was
likely to do. While pondering how he
could set about his unpleasant task
George was saved from making the
first step, always the most difficult, by
an observation from Ireland, which
paved the way to an explanation.
"How did you discover the church?"
he asked Idly.
"In rather a queer way. Lola Velea"?
Ireland opened his eyes, which had
been closed, and looked up. "Who 13
Loln-TTelez?" he asked anxiously.
"She Is a dancer whom I helped?oh,
quite Ina proper way, Mr. Ireland.
You knoW thetname?"
Ireluud, contrary to George's expectation,
nodded. "There was a woman
In San llcmo about the time of your
father's death. She was called Velez
and was in love with him."
"He seems to have been a fascinating
man," said George, smiling, to set
Ireland at his ease. "But this Lola Is
the daughter of the woman you mention.
It was she who found the
church."
By this time Ireland was quite
awake and keenly anxious for detuils.
"How did she learn its name?" he demanded
quickly.
"She found it in the confession of
Mrs. Jersey."
Ireland snapped the paper cutter he
Was holding, and, leaning back in his
clmir, looked anxiously at George.
"What do you mean?"
"Well," replied the young man, keepLIm
~~~~ * 1
iUK ui? i7V? liAtu ua Aitriitiju n muv, 11
seems that Mrs. Jersey left u confession
behind her as to what took place
at San Remo."
"Who has thut confession?"
"I have! I got it from Lola!"
"And how did she manuge to obtain
it?"
For answer Georgo related how Lola
had culled to see Mrs. Jersey, and how
she hnd managed to steal the confession.
"It was from rending it," finished
George, "that she leurned of the
church in which my parents were married.
Desiring that I should marry
her, and thinking I would not do so
were my birth proved, she went to the
church to destroy the registers. She
wus caught with torn leaves and urrested."
"Arrested ?"
"Yes. I wonder you did not see the
case reported in the papers."
"I have been too ill to read the papers
lately," said Ireland, looking round
the room in rather u helpless way,
"and none of my servants told me.
Offioe Bank Building
Union. 8. C
What havf-ened
"Oh, laUn '?t off with a small
flue. Sl.e Is now hack dauciug at her
music She gave the confession
to me."*
"Did any one else see it?the authorities
V" :
"No.v You can set your mind at rest,
Mr. Ireland. 1 got it from Lola before
Bke was taken to prison. No one hud
seen it but myself and Lord Derrington."
Ireland drew a long breath of relief.
"You made n strange remark just now,
George," he said, not looking at the
youug\tnnn. "You told me to set my
mind at rest. Why did you say that?"
"I huve read the confession," said
George quietly.
"Then you kuowV"
"I kuow that iny father's death was
due to an accident"
"What! Did that wretched woman
tell the truth?"
"She told the truth."
"And she did uot accuse me of having
murdered your father?"
"No: She did uot. 1 suppose she
thought it was as well to go to her
long home with as few sius as possible
on her conscience."
"Thank Clod for that," said Ireland.
"George," he said in faltering tones,
"I have suffered greatly on account of
that most unhappy accident. Your father
and 1 were not very good friends,
as I found it diiiicult to forgive him
for having taken from me the woman
I loved, but ut Sun ltemo we got on
better together. 1 stilled my reseutrneut
so that 1 might sec as much of
you as possible, George. Knowing that
I was not on good terms with Vane, 1
thought that Mrs. Jersey might have
accused uie of the crime. She did try
to get money out of me."
I "Ho Bawdsey told me."
"Bawdsey. Who is hcV"
"I forgot you don't know. lie is a '
detective who has been looking after
the case on behalf of Lord Derrington.
I learn from the confession of Mrs.
Jefsey that he is her husband."
"George Rates. 1 remember. She
told me she married him and went to
America. It wus after.her return from
America that she tried to get money
out of me. I refused. Not that 1 did
not realize the danger to which she
could expose me, but I knew that if 1
once yielded I would be in her power.
Besides, I had a defense, as she got
the stiletto from the woman Velez."
"And it was with that same stiletto
that Mrs. Jersey was killed."
y "JJy whom?" asked Ireland. "Did
her husband"?
"JSo. We do not know who killed
hfr??. Perhaps you may know?"
"I! Ireland looked genuinely surprised.
"No. How should I know?"
"Well," said George, rather awkwardly,
"it seems that Bawdsey has
got it into his head that you knew
I about this confession. That you were
afraid it would he published after her
death and that you went to the house
'ou that night to get it. lie doesn't exactly
accuse you of the murder, but"?
' "I don't know what else you would
call his statements but accusations,"
retorted Ireland, with some heat, "but
I never was near the house. I certainly
thought that Mrs. Jersey might
leave some such confession, but I never
nsfced her about it."
"Then you cannot guess who killed
her?"
"No. I was never near the house. 1
was in bed and asleep. My servants
will tell you so."
"I need not ask them," said George
quickly. "I never thought you were
guilty, and I only came to receive your
uouumuicou iii?il i 111111l ieir uawasey
and prevent him troubling you."
"If Bawdsey eotnes here I'll soon
make short work of him," said Ireland
sharply. "I am not nfrakl."
"You need not he. Mrs. Jersey's own
confession exonerates you."
"I don't mind even that. I would
have fnced the worst had It to be
faced. I never was a coward except in
me thing." He paused and looked timi.'.ly
et (loorge. "1 shrank from telling
you how I was the unliapity cause of
\ our father's death."
"Yon were not the cause, in my opinion.
Mrs. .Jersey was the cause."
"Well, i thought you would shrink
from me did you know all."
"I do know all. and I do not shrink
from you," replied (leorge. leaning
across the desk to shake Ireland's
luiud. "It was a pure accident and has
been related by your enemy."
"I am so glad the truth Is known to
you at last," faltered the old man,
"and that you see how unconsciously I
caused the death. I shall lie down forever.
But I am glad you know. I am
glad you are not angered."
"We nrc the best-of friends, Mr. Ireland.
You have always been kind to
me. I am afraid my visit bas beeu too
mucli for you."
"No. I nin glad you cniue. I am glad
you spoke out. 1 always Intended to
do so, but I feared lest you should
blame me."
By this time they wore ascending
the stairs, fionrirn I.nniliin?n.l ? .'
man to lils room and sent for the doctor.
Ireland undressed und got to bed.
Then he insisted on George leaving
him.
"Hut you are 111," protested the
young man.
"I am dying. But what of that? I
am glnd to die. I shall meet Itoslna
again after long, long years of sorrow.
Go, George. We understaud one another,
and you have forgiven me.
There is no more to be said."
"There Is nothing to forgive," replied
0eorgp softlyThen, to hupioy bis old
guardian, lie departed. A strong grip
of the hand was exchanged between
tbein. George left the room und saw
Ireland lying as still as any corpse.
Only his lips moved, and they murmured
continuously, "Itosina, Kosinat"
He wus true to the woman ho loved to
the very end.
George left the house, as there was
nothing he could do, but he Intended
to call in aguiu. Meanwhile he repaired
to Amelia square to see Bawdsey.
Derringtou wished him to tell tho detective
to stop looking after the case
und discharge him from his employ- ,
meat. In his pocket George had a
check for ?1,000, and when this was
paid the whole case was to be rclegat- ;
ed to obscurity. The sooner Bawdsey
married Lola and went to America the
better, Derringtou thought. And for
his own sake Bawdsey would hold his
tongue, seeing what u close connection
he was of the dead woman.
Buwdscy was at home and saw
George at once. lie looked rather excited
and could hardly keep his seat.
"Well, Mr. Brendou," he asked, "what
Is It?"
"I should rather ask you that," said
George. "You seem excited."
"Not very. Only I have been fortuuate
in some business, and"?
"What is the business?"
"I'll tell you that later. What is
yours?"
| "A pleasant one," rejoined George.
"Here is the chock for ?1,000 which my
grandfather promised jpou. Marry Lola
and go to the States aud stop searching
for tho assassin of Mrs. Jersey." i
"Thank you," replied Bawdsey, taking
the check eagerly; "your grandfather
is a prince, Mr. Brendou. As to
the ease, why should I stop searching?"
"You will never flud the assassin."
"Pardon me," said Bawdsey in high
glee. "I have found the assassin.
Miss Bull killed Mrs. Jersey."
?to be continued.)
THE LAND OF NICOTINE.
Smoking 8eem? to Be an Knnenttal
l'art of Japnneae I.lfe.
I think every man, woman and child
in Japan smokes. This may be an exaggeration,
especially as regards the
children, but it is no exaggeration to
say that Bmoklng is as much a part of
the everyday life of the people as is
eating or drinking, and it is indulged
in by women with tho same innocent,
nonchalant enjoyment as is exhibited
by the men. It was a bit of a shock
to me when I first came to Japan to
come face to face with this fact before
I had an opportunity to form any
sort of impressions of the little women
in whom I was prepared to be so interested.
I landed at Nagasaki and
almost immediately took a train for
MoJI, whence I was to go for a trip
through the interior. It was early
morning, and, belug In the midst of the
rainy season, everything was soggy
damp.
The first class carriage Into which I
was shown was anything but first
Class; it was unclean and badly ventilated,
and its only other occupants
were two Japanese ladles and a man.
The women had evidently Just finished
breakfasting In the car and were now
sitting on their feet upon the seat absolutely
enwrapped in clouds of the
most evil smelling smoke, which they
puffed from long elgnrettes. They were
beautifully dressed in silk kimonos and
were undoubtedly gentlewomen. I
knew that even then, when I had seen
bo few, and I must confess I was rather
annoyed, becnusc their daintiness
seemed to bo eutlr?)7 <l?atrnroJ. But
after a residence of months I think I
would rather Bee them smoke than not.
They do it so daintily, so innocently,
with such frank enjoy, uent, and so
constantly, that it seems a very part
of their quaint Japplness.?Eleanor
Franklin in Leslie's Weekly.
A Widow'* Charm.
There is nothing that need to perplex
one in the secret of a widow's
charm. She is simply saturated with
wisdom of the particular kind needed
in dealing with men. She has lived
! with one of the number, wintered and I
' summered him and learned when to
hold her tongue and when to be loquacious.
She may be past mistress
I In the art of keeping out of the way
until her society is very much wanted,
and that Is the acme of wisdom.
There are times when every human being
needs to be alone, to flgbt out the
little 111 tempers, shed the necessary
tears or make repairs In one's personal
appearance.?Detroit News.
The Beaedr.
"I have a premonition!" hoarsely
whispered she, pulling out her first
gray hair.
"Premonition of what?" growled her
husband.
"A premonition that 1 shall dye tonight."?Houston
Post.
Hie nepe.
Elder?go you're to be married, eh?
I hope you fully realize that it's a serious
stop. Younger?Well, If I never
realize that it -was. a serious misstep
I'll be satis?ed?? Philadelphia
Press.
Two Different Thin**.
XT-vlt ft- m -
anen?do sues lauen in love wiui
young Roxley. Belle?You don't sayl
Nell?Why, surely you heard about It7
Belle?No. I merely heard she was going
to marry him.?Exchange.
That Is the tragedy of every woman's
life. She Is pretty for a few
years and old for a great many.?Mrs.
Crnlgle.
PERT PARAGRAPHS.
One girl says that marriage is no
longer a lottery; It is make good or
pay alimony now.
I- ?>
Humor and Philosophy
By DUNCAN N. SMITH
, > i
Copyright, 1904, by Duncan M. Smith,
SEEING THINGS.
i
He was certain that the nation
To the dogs was going fast;
Sure that every indication
8howed the pinnacle was past.
Future prospects looked quite yellow.
And he blamed the money kings.
For this warped and twisted fellow
llad a way of seeing things.
Congress, he was very certain.
Couldn't do a single thing.
Ab he drew aside the curtain
There was one gigantic ring
Plotting for the land's undoing.
Buying votes and pulling strings?
For this creature, fuming, stewing,
Had a way of seeing things.
Nothing could be gained by hiding.
For the nation was, Itwas plain.
To dcmnltlon bowwows riding
On a mile a minute train,
Bwlfter than a western rabbit
Scoots out when a bullet sings?
For he, Just through force of habit.
Had a way of seeing things.
Thus in every public question
There was lurking loads of woe.
For ho had a poor digestion
And a liver that was slow.
That explained the situation.
That accounted for his (lings,
For his mental dissipation
And his way of seeing things.
As to Whiskers.
The Japanese think they represent
the highest type of development because
In the process of evolution they
have almost eliminated whiskers.
To them a thick growth of underbrush
iu which the Held mice may
build their nests and rear their young
does not represent the highest type of
civilization.
Just how they learn to conduct wars,
run the polities of the country and pick
the winners In the liorse ruce without
hanging around n barber shop Is not
quite clear, but ns they manage to do
these things It Is evidence they have
some avenues of information unknown
to the Caucasian races.
If they are correct In their surmise,
it explains why the beardless youth In
this country knows so much more than
his bewhlskercd father.
The Fly In the Ointment.
Yes. Horace . Is
pleasant and
sweet as can
His waltz step's
Just suited to
mine.
He certainly shows
much attention
I think that his
[a m tenor Is fine.
I'm sure that he
~ means to proI'm
sorry I must
him
He an lncome
keep
me In hose?
Alas, for his fatal
defect!
Explanation.
"bdc married a man twenty years
her Junior."
"I didn't think she was worth aa
much niouey as all that."
Depends on the Kind.
"A half loaf Is better than no bread."
"I dou't know," suld Mr. Newlywed
sadly. "Have you e?er tried any of
my wife's bread."
Comfort Dictates.
Ono hour of sleep, tho doctors say.
At night beats two hours In the day.
But who has will to heed the warning
If he can snooze throughout the morning?
Reason Enough.
The Parrot?Why did the crow leave
his last place?
The Owl ? lie was discharged for
caws.
PERT PARAGRAPHS.
It is only lu books that children cry
for bread. In real life they howl for
pie.
It Is the man who travels on half
fare who wants two seats.
Nothing is meaner than a boy unless
it Is two boys.
No Derson so intensely loves his country
as the man who has a fat contract
for furnishing l.t supplies.
It Is said on good authority that tin*
automobile face Is no relation to the
horse laugh.
Some men love
their country for
vC W) the office8 ^ ij*8
A ruu on a
I V y bank Is not con\\J\Jsldered
good exnffi
vL-Jf \ U erclae by the
It Is always a young man witb money
that the girls want to marry for
the purpose of reforming him.
When a man works half a day and
rests the other half he may be said to
have a half loaf.
A dentist cannot see why. any one
should consider a baby pretty until
after It has a full set of teeth.
Almost everybody has an aim In Mf*
but some of us hate dreadfully to peg
away at target practice.
The man who has money to born
doesn't have to. Be can afford eosL