The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, September 23, 1904, Image 8
I DECADENCE
IN AR.T
Orypvright, 1901*. hy Aula PototU
roily Anne Greenway's family
thought her decidedly gifted, and that
young lady's singular esteem for her
relatives' opinions forced her to come
to the same conclusion.
Nevertheless, when she announced
her intention of studying art, her father
demurred. It was one thing to
have talent, but quite a different matter
to depart from the beaten track,
and Polly's family had other views
for her.
"Let her marry and settle down,"
said her father.
But Polly's lips came together In a
very firm line. There were plenty of
women In the world. Let those who
felt Inclined marry and be given in
marriage; as for her, she had a mission
in life and she meant to perform
It.
And nhe went about wearing such a
set apart expression that parental objections
care way and she was allowed
one meager bat soul Inspiring year in
New York.
After that began the long battle
with publishers and advertising bureaus.
Discouragement she met at
first with the joy of resistance, but
that sort of joy weakens with use,
and surely Tolly's ill luck was phenomenal.
At last her cover for the Christmas
number of a magazine was accepted
and hope once more lit its lamp in her
breast But when a villainous lithographer
transformed her designs so
that nothing remained that she could
v call her own, her stoicism gave way
utterly, and she folded her wings for
a season.
It was just at this Juncture that the
Y. M. O. D. C. made his nppearanco.
This title he acquired later on, when
she discovered that he was a Young
Man of Diabolical Cunning.
Tolly had met him at more than one
function, and he swelled the list of a
large and uninteresting bowing acquaintance
from which individuals
whrs once in a long while selected to
mi op vacancies made by removals
and ^occasional misunderstandings.
W%y should he call upon her? She
ran ftpldly over her scant knowledge
concerning him as she came down to
meet him. llather stiff and expressionless.
Rumored well off and on the
point of marriage to some stranger.
Nothing very decided, nothing particularly
attractive.
The Y. M. O. D. C. rose before she
had time to smile any "glad to see you"
flbe.
"Good morning, Miss Greenway. Perhaps
I should apologize for troubling
you, but the truth Is I am In a dilemma
and have come to you for advice."
Polly settled herself and became nil
attention. A man may be most uninteresting,
but the moment be asks for
edvice be becomes in the eyes of the
vug- .,<5ggMian^?el^onsultlng n most dlscernworth
cultivating.
~ \rare that I
"Ton probably are not uvC
have been building a house
She believed she had heard It mltt^
tloned In connection with the homecoming
of the stranger bride.
"It la completed," he continued, "and
is now ready for the decorators. Just
here is where I wsnt your advice.
There are lots of professional decorators,
but none of my friends' houses
aatUA^a ssia k
vHtt-Mvw wv. mvuic vi lurui uuw ucru
done by well known decorators. 1
choose to think they show a lack of Individuality.
Now, I beg of you to undertake
the management of the whole
scheme of decoration and furnishing.
Oh, pray don't veto It," as Polly's eyebrows
went up to her pompadour, "till
you have heard me out. I want each
room In my house to be part of one
scheme and the keynote of the whole
thing to be simplicity. If you will undertake
It you shall have all the help
you wish?anything, everything you
need to carry It out. It Is well planned
and well finished. I don't want It to
be ostentatious or handsome or have
any of those nnbolstery things, but to
be quiet, restful, artistic?a home in every
sense of the word."
"But I don't believe I'm competent,"
said Polly, whom the Idea began to
appeal stroi;?.y?"In fact, I am sure I'm
not."
"Does that mean that you wouldn't
care to undertake it?"
"Oh, dear, not I think I should like
It above all things. I wish I bod taken
op that sort of thing at the art school."
"Then let as go at once and look at
the house, and you can form your
plans."
In five minutes they were on a car.
Polly was carried off her feet. The
whole undertaking grew momentarily
more attractive, and, as she was an Inveterate
castle builder, by the time the
car stopped at Lincoln street she had
# Dmoqm a" successful middle aged decorator.
Rhi found the house a perfect gem In
Its way, beautifully laid out and with
all aorta of possibilities in the way of
decoration. Am aba went from room to
room her delight and enthusiasm were
goodtoaae.
80 the work waa undertaken, and upon
the whole everything went well.
She did not often see the Y. M. O. D
C.,. but bla appreciation and suggestions
were always helpful, and a tele?
to.rrr
Tm TaUj Bpckley 22
out difficulties with atubbdro or Inefficient
workmen.
It is bard to say just when Polly began
to hate the bride elect, but the
feeling reached Its climax on that day
when, everything being completed, the
workmen gone and the owner out of
town, she stole back for a last look before
the key should have left her possession.
She sat down on a high
backed settle commanding a vista of
three rooms. The sun threw stains and
splashes of color on the vhlald floor,
and outside a high wind whistled
mournfully, the sort of wind that sings
to sensltivo ears of sorrow and desolation.
"I don't care how mauy houses 1
should decorate, there could never be
another one just like this, and his wife
Will bring a whole lot of wedding presents
and stufT aud Just ruin everything.
I wish I had never seen the
place. I wish I had never been born,"
sho ended miserably. Then she wiped
her eyes angrily.' "No wonder I haven't
been a success," she thought. "I am a
weak minded simpleton anyway, and
no doubt that fact is patent to every
one but myself."
But notwithstanding her scorn of
herself the tears continued to come
from some inexhaustible source.
"Well, this is a success anyway," she
mused a trifle more cheerfully, "and
the color scheme and the plan are my
own, and It cannot possibly turn into
wretched, glaring pinks and blues or
any old washed out things."
Then all at once the Y. M. O. D. C.
stood before her horrified eyes, and she
felt like a thief as she stood up weakly
and tendered liim the key.
"No; sit down. Let's talk about it," he 1
said. "Great success, Isn't It? I cannot
flatter myself too much for my courage
and wisdom In going to you."
He sat down beside her on the settle,
looking so thoroughly contented and
prosperous that she linted him from
the bottom of her heart, or thought she
did, which Is Just the same thing till i
we find out the difference.
"Everything is ilnlshed. When shall
we move in?" lie said. "It needs a
woman in trailing robes handling delicate
china and moving lightly from
room to room to give the finishing
touch and turn it into a home."
"It will need servants in the kitchen
and provisions in the pantry and plenty
of management," said Polly grimly, '
sick of the picture he drew and de- j
termined to cut short his rhapsody.
"Well," he said quizzically, "when
shall we move in and begin the management?"
"I should think your fiancee would
have some choice in the matter."
"Oh, I don't know," said he unconcernedly.
"I think, perhaps, she will be
satisfied."
! "You take a good deal for granted," '
said Polly. "You must think n wife is
a perfect noneutity." r"
"You will be a good deal together, I
hope," he went on, Ignoring her remarks.
"I like the way you manage
things."
"Do you,indeed?" thought Polly. Her
lips quivered, and she made a mental
resolution never agnin to cross the
threshold.
There was a long silence while Polly
looked at the rooms, and the Y. M. O.
D. C. looked at her. Finally Polly
stood up, but he took her hand and
drew her down again. ;
"When are we going to be married,
Polly?" he said.
"Who?" gasped Polly. **
"We?you and I?Polly."
"We?and your fiancee?what do you
mean?" she cried In distress.
"There Isn't auy one hut you, Polly.
I built the house just to Ket you to
decornte It; then people had to provide
^ reason, and It really wasn't worth
^hfrj^contra dieting them. I'm a dreadful
sinner, Poify", "but"! ooulan't Intdrest
you in any other way. Do forgive
me and admit that you love the house
?and me."
But Polly, wholly unprepared and too
paralyzed for speech, sat back cold and
pale. She' shivered slightly.
A fire of driftwood had been laid in
the quaint corner fireplace.
"Come, Polly," he said, taking her
hand again; "we will light the fire and
talk it over."
And they did.
gawr Pads af Smokers.
"Men who enn afford to smoke really
good cigars have more fads than other
men you will meet in a day's walk,"
said a Broadway manufacturer who
makes a good many cigars to ordor for
his customers. "I know men who
throw a cigar away the moment the
ashes fall off. They believe the taste
of It Is ruined then. For such customers
I make very close rolled clgare.
"Other customers like a cigar (tolled
so light that the ashes float off of their
own accord. They like the red Are.
Many men will never relight a cigar
after It has gone out. Nothing could
Induce them to. Others relight a cigar
five or six times beforo they discard
it Needless to say; they do not get
the best of a good cigar.
"I hare one customer who has a
special brand of after dinner cigars
made for him. They cost him $1 each
net and are of medium size. It la bis
invariable habit to keep the cigar between
his teeth half an hour before
lighting it. Ills guests may light up
With the coffee, but he never does. He
likes to Inhale the fragrance of the
tobacco?to become permeated with It,
so to speak?before he lights up. Then
the cigar lasts him precisely one hoar."
?New York Times.
Good mm Hu Word.
Vim,,. 1/U?Btu> n??-l *? ?? "
??v?uv> u?\ju?muv unT\i w oa; iimi if
be ever married a mun It would be
because she wanted to xx\ake him miserable,
yet she married that young
Frlszletop after she had known him
only a week.
Gwendolen?Yes; It seems to have
been a case of bate at first sight.?Chicago
Tribune.
' 1 "&Y heart. /
? ud beoiU pi sigbt completely: !
*>' ?-?
Humor and Philosophy 1 *
By DUNCAN M. StUJH
?+ 1
Copyright. 1904. by Duncan If. Smith. '
HB HAS TO HAVE IT.
\
It you'd great and wealthy be, I ,
If you're anxious to succeed.
Seek a fortune teller; he
Will supply your every need.
Sure success he will dispense.
If you pay him fifty cents.
If you're sick and In distress.
He will cure you every time.
Kvll spirits won't molest
If you clink him dime on dlmat
Great will be your recompense
If you pay him fifty cents.
Palmist and clairvoyant, he
Render will your sweetheart trust
Present, future, past he'll see.
And he'll tell It all to you.
With a throbbing soul Intense,
If you give him fifty cents.
Every one can wealthy be,
Joyous, happy, richly blessed.
Who this wondrous man will see
And disburse at his request.
In his business coin he needs?
Has to have. If he succeeds. ? - '
A Thank You Job. V
Teacher?You should lovlj your
schobl. I don't complain bAauae I
have to come here every dny^
Willie?Neither would I Ifut could
draw a salary for It. #
No Skill Required! m~
"I wish I knew n recipe for falling
heir to a million."
"It shouldn't be very hard work.
Jenks did it, and he had had uo practice
whatever."
Good Enough to Eat.
You see a maid, demure and neat,
Who seems quite good enough to eat.
And so she is. but not the way
You had in mind, for I dare say
That she Is food enough to eat.
And strong enough. If It's your treat;
Bo don't take out this damsel shy
Unless you have the price to hug.
Easier to Do.
"Still Belling gold bricks to ths farmers?"
"No; that was too slow. I'm gelling
gold mines to the aristocrats."
Hardened.
"There goes a man who writes many
of the popular songs of tlfr- Jjw/*.
"Some men will do anything for
money." ; ' j;
FarewelL
Goodby, straw hat. v '*"
You to the mat.
Away!
You've had your day.
Once you were fresh and bright.
Now you're a sight.
Do..'t linger round the plaea
Chase
Yourself. Begone!
You can't be placed In pawn.
No self respecting cow
"Would eat you now.
You're a relic, a has been,
A twin y
To a back nuniber.
You cumber W
The earth. You've gone b|Lmr,
To the dump! JT
PERT PARAGRAPHS,
The world would.Jbe- Jixj abode, of j
peace if there were not so many peo- 1
pie In It tlint Just won't see thing* ,
from onr point of view. 1
There isn't any use trying to cush- '
Ion the sharp corners of the world j
with your own avoirdupois. f
It takes a really clever person to be '
good all the time. *
The reason why some people don't (
take physical culture exeftise Is be- j
cause they do It oitfy when they have
nothing else to do. ^
In some steam heated 3ats the feet (
of the radiators suffer cruelly from
chilblains. '.f$%
When you don't know what else to do*
ask the Janitor to do a bit of repairing,
and wait until he does It. '
i ~ ?*&
man may be reasonably cultured
and atill leave bin table manner* at
home when he goes to a railway lunch
counter.
|t take* a rainy day to show how
heartleMly your friend* have treated
you.
Beware of going out to spend a night
with the man who tell* you he 1* not
drinking.
w w v ' *
That little czarowlt* doe* not realize
how much more than hi* share of the
world'* trouble be 1* billed to tnherlt.
The man who failed to get a nomination
can't see how hi* country would
Cto the dog* If hie party happened
g*t \
illiggffijiyyjl
ODD MOON BELIEF8. 1
foe OA of Xlfkt mm Foo4 For <h?
" Immortal Got*.
Certain it la that a belief In the moon
U the abode of the fathers was widely (
spread among the people apeaklng the ,
Aryan languages. To the present day
the peasants In Swabla are heard to
ay, "May I go to the moon If I did it,"
instead of "May I die if I did it." Nay,
people who work on the Sabbath day
are threatening even now that they
Will go to the moon?that is, that they
will die and be punished In the moon.
A more startling idea?peculiar, it
would seem, to India?was that of the 1
moon serving as the food of the gods.
And yet, though it sounds strange to
us, it was not so very unnatural an
idea after all. The gods, though invisible,
had been located In the sky. In
the same sky the golden moon, often
compared to a round of golden butter,
was seen regularly to decrease. And
if it were being consumed by anybody
by whom could It be consumed if not
by the gods? Hence the ready conclusion
that It was so and that it was, in
fact, this food which secured to the
gods their immortal life.
If so much had once been granted,
then came the question. How was the
moon gradually increased and restored
to lis fullness? And here the old superstition
came iu that the souls of the
departed entered the moon, so that the
waxing of the moon might readily be
accounted for by this more ancient article
of faith. Hence the systematized
belief that the moon wanes while it is
being eaten by the gods and that it
waxes while it Is being filled by the
departed souls entering It. A last conclusion
was that the gods when feeding
on the moon were really feeding on
the souls of the departed.
TOMB OF CONFUCIUS.
One of (b* Chief Spot* of Interest In
the Orient.
The city of Chufuhslen, the Mecca of
the believers in Confucianism, Is In the
province of Shangtung, one of the most i
populous districts of the prlent. Here <
Confucius was born, and here his
acred bones lie burled. Tho tomb,
which is located in one of the largest
cemeteries In the province, about three
miles out from the oltn nhnvo montlnn.
ed, Is one of the most imposing in the
whole empire.
Tho grave Itself is surmounted by an
earth mound about twelve feet In i
height, the whole surrounded by a
cluster of gnarled oaks and stately cypress
trees. Before tho mound Is a
tablet about six feet broad and twenty <
feet high, upou which are Inscribed the J
names and deeds of the great founder
of Confucianism, n religion adhered to
by over 400,000,000 human beings. The
burden of this Inscription, according to
reliable translation, is "Perfect One,"
"Absolutely Pure," "Perfect Sage,"
"First Teacher," "Great Philosopher,"
etc.
The; avenue which leads up to the
philosopher's tomb is even more Interesting
than the actual place of burial
Itself. On each side of the avenue are
rows of figures of huge animals cut
in stone?lions, tigers, elephants and
iiorses, besides numerous mythical
creatures, such as animals half dog
ind half frog, four legs
ind twicers1 mnny wings,lbfSWfeS' a
ttu}Utude of unnmnable monsters that
Sever lived on the earth, In the water
or in the air. Taken altogether,
the burial place of Confucius is one of
the chief spots of interest in the ori
suu
The Caric of Money.
A negro was arrested for stealing.
Be bad been caught helping himself
to the contents of the cnsh drawer In
the store of a Mr. Appleton. The magistrate
before whom the negro was
Drought knew him and was much surprised
to learn the charge against the
prisoner. Looking at the negro earnestly,
he snid: "Sara, I'm sorry to
see you here. Didn't you know that
no good could come from stolen monBy?
There's a curse on It."
"Well, Jedge," replied the prisoner,
"I didn't know Mlstab Appleton stole
Sat money. 1 couldn't tell dat by jest
Looktn' at it."?Harper's-Weekly.
Hard Lack.
"Just my luck!" she exclaimed,
stamping her little foot angrily.
"What's the matter?" be asked.
"There's a pin," she returned, pointing
to one on the floor near her foot,
"and you know the superstition, of
course."
" 'See a pin and pick It up, through
all the day you'll have good luck,'" he
quoted.
"Exactly," she said. "Through all
the day,' and hero it Is evening when 1
see It"?Pittsburg Press.
Sweet Woman's Way.
Sweet Maid?You must remember
that ours was a summer engagement
The Man?That means If you see any
one you like better you'll break It
"Yes."
"And If 1 see any one I like better"?
"Til sue you for breach of promise."
?Boston Traveler.
I
1 ?
Often Remflnded.
"How often," said the philosopher,
"a man la reminded of his own littleness
in tills great world?"
"Yea," answered Mr, Cumrox, "especially
If he lias three daughters who
hare bsen to boarding school."?Washington
Star.
Hta Title.
"Did Edith marry a title?"
"Well, she married Rounders, who I*
known about town as a prince of good
fellows."?Cleveland Leader.
rially CatmtMt.
"X doubt if you know the difference
between grand opera and comic opera."
"Oh, but 1 do. Qrand opera la n?
la."-Peek. _
* J
Humor and Philosophy ?
By DUNCAN M. SMITH
1 J
Copyright, 1904, by Duncitn M. Smith. . h
PERT PARAGRAPHS. J
c
When a woman perpetrates a Joke 0
With a hatpin any one can see the n
point. t(
? b
Mosquitoes have some discrlmtna- Q
tlon; they only luneli off the cigarette 0
smoker as a last resort. t
J
A mean trick looks lots meaner In e
four neighbor's youngster than It looks s
In your own. j
? i
When a policeman is in bad humor t
he may consider breathing disorderly I
conduct. ii
? 11
If reason governed in affairs of the
heart there might be less business for t
the mnrriage license clerk. t
? r
Lack of opportunity to lie naughty a
keeps more men good than fear of the n
law. \
? L
The man who wishes to develon hi? .
bump of caution should purchase a 1,
mule. v
- b
The grafter wishes to have every- a
thing reformed but the thing by which i
he Is turning a few dishonest dollars. b
- o
Wisdom that cannot be coined Into n
dollars does not receive any consld- y
arable amount of honor or attention g
In this kind of a world. c
- fl
One thing that prevents a man from t
using his friends more Is the fact that a
they arc busy using him so much of B
the time. g
Doubtless some women get married
so they can eat onions whenever they
feel like it without running any risks, o
- t
The coal trust cannot get excited h
over the rumor that the sun Is grow- v
Ing colder. It may see a prospective li
customer. n
If a little girl could have her way she b
would turn her home Into an asylum t
for orphan cats. c
t
It's Hoodoo. f
Bome things there are that you may do ^
And not get punished very hard? t
Get drunk, run oft a time or two 0
And still escape the stern regard
Of evil fortunes when they pass '
Tour way; but you can shed your tsars b
If you should break a looking glass 1]
You'll have bad luck for seven years. ^
When baby freta and won't be still ?
Sometimes .you're half Inclined to see v
If looking glass and hammer will ^
Distract hi# mind till good he'll be.
You'd better hope the fit will pass
And let him yell to spilt your ears.
For If he breaks the looking glass
You'll have bad luck for seven yearn
A friend has borrowed of you ten;
You know you'll nevei get It back. C
Don't look into the mirror then, ?
Lest you should hear the mirror crack.
Just dodge around and let things pass
And try to bear misfortune's Jeers. <1
But don't you break a looking giaa*
Or you'll go bump for seven yeara. j.
Suited the Kind. -
"How Is Williams setting alougf 1
"He's rnnnlng his business Into the 1
ground." 1
"Too bad." 1
"No, It's all right. lie Is a well dig- 1
??." J
The Joker.
That through the country he might fly,
Like lobstera on the wing.
He took an auto out to try, \
And then he bought the thing. ,
Said the repair man to his clerk. I
The while he laughed in glee,
"No odds how hard that guy may work, (
ril draw his salaree."
Always the Issue.
"We must touch tho voters of my
county up on the iuouey question."
ouif mjr uear uir, iuc money quen
tlon Is not an Issue this fall."' ,
"It Is with the fellows I am going |
to do business with." ,
- 1
Hardly an Asset. * 1
"All Is lost but honor." I
"Well, that is something. Can't
yon borrow money on It 7"
Pretenders. *
While from a mln be stole a kiss.
It needless was, 'twixt you and (U.
'Twai Just a play to do that way;
He might have had a dosen free. (
Down to His Site.
"He Is writing for posterity."
"He most agree with the theory that
the race Is degenerating." ]
I
Not There.
"Three Is a crowd, you know."
"That so? Did you ere* ride on a <
Chicago atonal car?" 1
-*' ' *- V*" '.."M ''L ,V. -v ,
- ' . " '
JSE OF PERSONAL PRONOUF f
Vky the Cae?ltlT?(et Appear Ah 2
were to Be Telklep ef lell. "r
All the uncultivated appear almost alrays
to be talking about themselves, ut
It Is easy for a superficial observer
) exaggerate the extent to which this
i the case. For instance. If you disuse
with a cultivated man a question
f morals or the wisdom or rectitude of
ny particular line of conduct^ he will
ell you what he (hlnke right or what
>e thinks wrong or what strikes him
a wise or foolish, with very little use
f the personal pronoun. He can see
he situation from the outside. Bet if
'ou discuss It with an uneducated man
te Is Incapable of this detached attlude
of mind. The uneducated man can
nly picture the circumstances to htmplf
by picturing himself In the midst
f them. What he thinks right and
rise Is, no doubt, often a great deal
tetter and wiser than what he would
ictually have done. "Such and such a
hlng was wrong; I should not have
Lone it," he says, or: "Such and sueh
ens foolish. Now, had It been me, I
ihould have done so and so." To the
ophistlcated listener be gives an lmtresslon
of appalling self righteous- ^
less and even perhaps of hyprocrlsy,
tut the Impression Is a mistaken one.
Ie argues In the vocative case, because
t is mo one in wblch be can most easly
express himself.
Some people. It mu*t be admitted, atract
confidences from those who hare
>o weakness for mnking them. We are
iot alluding to those persons who by
i method of deft cross questioning
nan a go to abstract information with
rhlch they have no business. Such
aformatlon is not confided by Its origin
1 owner, but stolen from him, or at < ~\
east wormed out of him. The people
re mean have that in tholr face and
earing which makes all the world
t home with them. Whoever meets
hem may know that they are lncapale
of giving a snub or a rebuff to any
ne who claims their sympathy, be be
ever so silly. They go about the
rorld unarmed and unafraid and, to
lve human nature Its due, unhurt. Unonsclously,
it Is they who make the
rat confidence, telling those who Ma
hem, even for the first time, that tbey
re sympathetic and detached, and as
hrewd as they are harmless.?London
pectator.
Itraage Pate of u Eagliih Earl,
"1 cauie across a bit of treasure the
ther day," writes a Washington auhor
who Is down on Capo Cod. "It
i the log book of the schooner Hera,
rhlch sailed from Boston on a day
a the seventies. She sailed with a *
ew first mate on board.
"He seemed an ambitious man, and
ie understood navigation. The cap*
aln suspected him of a desire to be
aaster of a vessel himself some day,
>ut there was little about him to sag*
est that he was anything i^t a sailor.
?ha third day out he wAyAaught by
he down haul of the mfx&stnnd went
verboard. His body was wer recovred.
When the Hera cameBack from
ler voyage she was met by two Stag- v
Lshmen. They had crossed the waer
posthaste to find that first mate.
Somebody had died In England, and?
cell, the man who was lost off that
Yankee schooner was the Earl of
Aberdeen."?Washington Poet. #
Dor* ok Too HcbtUt,
"This won't go for only one stamp/*
aid the village postmaster to old TJnle
Kluh as the latter handed him a
mlky nud much sealed missive.
"Whuf for? What's de iuaddah wld
Lat?"
'Too heavy," replied the postmaster,
lalanclng It on his hand.
"Umph! I tolo dat boy so when he
ras a-wrltln' of It. I tole him he was
vrltln* too henby a ban*, bat he kep' 9
n n-benrln' down an' a-bearln* down *
?n de pen, lahk a load o' hay. I'll take V.
t back, sah, an' mck him write wld a
>encll. I ain't gwlne spen' np mo' 2
isntses Jes' for his plglieadedness."
An Odd Record.
The late Miss Julia Moore, Sir John
doore's niece, like many very old popple,
was extremely proud pf her age
ind lost no opportunity of showing !?.
CVheu she was asked by a friend if she
ivas going to see the coronation q(
King Edward VII. she answered: "No.
[ have been out of London for the last
three coronations, and I don't care to
liter my record," What an exaltation
>ne must feel at being able to say n * 1
thing like thatl
Mrcagth.
"Some scientist has declared that
there Is as much strength In three Jf**
is there Is tn a pound of beeMnT
aid the observer.
"Well," replied the actor, "I
sgg once that would have ellmf t
the other two egga from that pi, V
Hon."?Exchange. . B*]|
Prarlig Por tk? Slattr.^Q
Mrs. Bitter?I Just hate that \&edf ""11 ?
t hope she'll lose all her monff
some disfiguring illness, be ruiithe
by a train? Rev. Ooodhart?Sls^tan
ter! We are told to pray for o^J'
mlee. Mrs. Bitter?Well, I'm *'
for all those things for her:?
t>hla Press. . jfd J
not the LaatlorS'a PaaM. ^
A traveling man found a hair in hlsw
>rder of lioney at a Muscotah hotel tad \
complained to the landlord about It. J
T run't half* It"
- ----- - "i wiwwiu rvpiiM. , ||>.
'I bought It for combed hOney."?Kao- "V
las City Star. . \ 71
A laraieal DIIcmmm. F
"Did Jones have appendicitis?" I
"The doctors disagreed. Some thought -* 4
be had money and some thought m ,, ?
hadn't."?Pock. I flBy l
My spark may grow greater by kiaJllng
my brother's taper.?Jeremy Tap3M
v.. . \