The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, February 06, 1903, Page 3, Image 3
I Executors, Administrators, Trustees
and Suardians.
You are hereby'to! ifieri that you must
make your animal returns to tins court.
The law inquires you to make loiurus
each and every ^ear. If -you fail to do
fo you will foifeit your commissi' 11
The law will tie strictly enforced in tins
particular. JASON M Gkf.f.u,
Jan. 22, 1903< J-Voba'e Ju-ge
Notice to Debtors and Creditors.
. JA11 peisohs holding claims against
fctrs. 1). K. McXoce, dterased, will pieFenCNimo
propeilv alteMtd to the unrit
reigned tor pavnigtit. All pmsois
owing decea-ed. hy note. mortgage or
otherwise wM in^ke p-vm-int of same oil
or before March 1st. Ibo.'l .
T. M. VCNkacf.
Agent for Mrs. Leila McNi-ac*.
4-4t
Citation to Kindred and Creditors.
State of 8ou?h Carolina, \
County of Union. |
fiy Jason M. Greer, E><i , I'robatc Judg<\
Whereas, L (}. Young. Machith
-Young and S. .J. Weln-r have nind?* smi
to me to grant them letters of Ad r.inis.
tration on the estate and elf e s of John
r> , L. Voting, dec? hs? d
Tl ^e are, therefore, to rite aJ1
rnonieh all and singn'ar th k*n lr?d and
creditors of the said John L Voting. <1 ceased,
ihat tiny tie and npnear \?-rore
me, in the Court of ITolnte, to t>e hel-t
at I nion C. II . Suith Caro'i.na, on the
14 h uay of Ftbrumy, next, al'tei puhl cation
hereof, at 11 o'clock in t'?? fo.e'
noon, to show caus-, if any iln-v h tv?\
why thesaid At'uiiuistiation should not
be granted.
Given under niv band and seal this
28ih day of Jan. Anno Domini. ltHi'5
Jason M (iurm;,
' I'robate Judge.
Published on tlic .'10th day of Jan.
1903, inThk Union Timi s. ."?-2 .
Life and Accident insurance.
The Aetna Life Insurance writes
eoliaies not only for Life Indemnity,
ut- also policies that protect you in
Case of accidept or sickness. The
atalv Old Ltri'e Conmanv in tlie United
States to ctogthis. Kates are very
/ ' Reasonable, T'his company is well
known and comment is unnecessary.
I am representing the above Company
and will be pleased to call on
any oDe wishing insurance. Write
ine at Carlisle, 8. C.
46-tt . W. F. Batfs, Agent.
Final Discharge. ,
Notiee is hereby given that J. Woods
Jeter, Executor of the estate of A ion
Kelly, deceased, has applied to Jason M.
Greer,"Judge of Probate, in and for the
.founty. of Union, tor a lbial discharge as
such Executor.
* ^ It I? Qudertid, That the 17.li/'ay of
February A. 1). he fixed lor he*r %
. jnflt'tf oetition, aud a ilual set dement or
'* \ "
x-; ' Jason M. Gkekr.
Probate Judge Union Co., S
, Published iu Union Times Feb. 10
1003. 3 3Ud.
Final Discharge.
Notice is hereby given that J. F. Alnian,
Sr., Adrniiiisliator of tl e (State of
E. K. Altxander, deceased, has applied
to Jason M. fireer, Judge of Probate,
in and for the county (f Union, tor a
Dual discharge as such Administrator.
It Js Ordered. 'J'hat the 10th day of
"February. A. 1J 1003. be fixed for hear
in? of petition, and a iinal settlement of
said iSlate.
^ Jason M. Gn: eu,
Probate Judge. Union Co.. 6. C.
Published in Union liME^Peb Hi.
ICO). u-CUJ.
BRICK! BRICK!! BRICK!!
For ?ale in any
Quantity.
The Rodger Brick Works.
i S*. * - ' .
FOR SAI^EvCiflHA
\ c v. " ' ' * - ^ -?
One 15 II. P. Boiler ajjd Rngino (ib.*
tached) one Brick itching, '20,<JC(h
daily capacity. ' ' '
The Rodger Brick Works,
25-tr
Si New Quarters
Having moved to my now stind,
^ and got everything in ship shape, I
am prepared to attend to your neerla
in the line of watches, jewelry and
repairing. Qive me a call.
F H TrofTQ?
I ?* 1 I UIIiWl 9
Williamson's Old Stand.
41
Final Discharge.
Notice H hereby p,iven I hat. ,1 II
Hamilton, administrator of t! ? ehlato of
V. 1'. Hamilton. Sr., riwaatd, lias >?]?Cled
to J aeon M. Gr?or, Judge of finite,
in and for t.'.e county of Union,
for a final discharge as such ndmiuialrator.
It Is Ordered. 1 hat the flih <hy of
February, A. 1>. 100.'!, bn UxmI fur Inmiog
of pelitiou and a lioal settlement of
suid estate.
JASON M. OllEKIt,
l*r< b-iio .Jndgo.
Published in Union Tires Jau. 0,
( X90S.. jr,\> 2-iJ<XI.
'-* ''iJriPStfht'i a iWrSffihSThri* 1*.
#o?o?o#o?c?c#o?o#o#c?o(jo?ow
t f BOWSEI
|!Pens Hi
11^4. Life
o
r,?oaoeoeo8oec?csoeoocccGo<
icopynpnt. K; by C. H. I.ouIf. 1
f~( ilS. r.OV/SER was eonsidera
ITw S 1 :y ;5,y ?th' "v'"JLV&
11 - v V !1 Xr> l'-'vsvr ?:.?!
< !i 1 . ?!! i 1 illib ! :;>? I- nfhr
dinner and n tiled himself down ; > if
lie intended lo write a IMKI'.> word story.
She repressed Iter curiosity until lie
h:ul written half a !?:;;_?* ami then inquired
:
"Is it the draft of some important
paper you are drawing ttpV"
"IJr.lhrr imp riant." lie replied as he
leaned hack in I Is chair and looked up
| at the cciliu.ut in a vacant way. "It's so
important that the editor of the Haulier
is willing to pay S'n for it."
"Hut what can it he a story":"
"Some people miulit call it that, hut
It will be headed 'The Ar.tobhwrrapiiy
(F"~ : . n rsia
t - >" .. - -'W; , ?
m % I ; i U
' :
rilU CALL til WAS I.OOitlNU loll a family
nam dA <u:i.I:n\
of Mr. Bowser.' It's; for (lie Sunday issue
unci will lie accompanied by a life
sized portrait of the undersigned."
"How queer!'' whispered Mrs. Ilowser.
"I don't see anything queer about it.
In fact, I've wondered that some entevjpising
journal didu't ask for this very
tiling long ago."
"Hut what can there have happened
in your life to interest any one?'' she
continued.
"A huudp'd thiiy;s?* fi thousand?ten
thousand. I will rlad you what I have
got .written, and perhaps even you will
he : urprisid. Here it h :
" ' Mii the night el' Mr. ItowS'Pr's hirtli
a barn near by was struck by lightning,
a horse fell into a pond and was
drowned, the postoMice was robbed,
and a carpenter named .Tones was
murdered in Ids bed. It will thus be
seen that our hero* "?
Here there was a ring at the front
door, and, as the girl was out, Mr.
i>u??nL-r iiiK-wcmt 1110 noil, i no caller
|||
ill; FOUND HIS NEC
* n?is kVokin^ for family named Croon
ftnd ^as directed to the other end of
tiib: block.
"That our hero did what?" asked
Mrs. liowser as the historian resumed
hi* son t.
"That is as far as I have Kot. Uwill
now go on and say that out? could j
lmvo safely predict id a life full of!
stirring adventures from those early'
incidents. / The subject of our sketch,
was hardly three months old when lie
was loft in his cradle alone for an
hour one day. The doors of the house
were open, and while (he child slept
and smiled"?
"Ting-a-ling-llng," went the hell, and
Mr. Bowser answered it 11? find a wo
man on the steps who wanted to know
if his name was Johnson and if lie
had thrown a beer k< ,r at her hoy ltohort
that day. It took hiiA live minutes
to Ret rid of her, and as lie returned to
the sitting room Mrs. Dowser asked:
"Did a hear come in and devour the
hnhyV I hope It won't turn out so."
"As I was the baby, and as I am still
living, I wasn't devoured. I shall finish
that paragraph by saying that a
gypsy eitteretl the house to steal me.
find he was alrepdy :curr> ing ine olT in
his nrnu} when a faithful dog attacked
him and defeated his object. Then 1 ,
go on:
"'Scarcely three months later the
mother went down collar one day after
Jam, leaving the baby sticking its lingers
in the cradle. She was absent for
perhaps live minutes, and upon her return
she was amazed'
The bell rang for the third time, and
A L S'i . ' -jf*
>o?o?o?o ?o*;c?oC .?o?o0c?^?c?
o o
L?; r f ?
. o <?> o
:: S He Sets Out i S
I * '''> Write His ! $
; ^ - Autobic?ra- ;; ?
o i pk>' Fcr * : ?
... 0 .; PaTcr, but >' +,
t 9 ? End3 With % r
'<*- c> *' c\ Fight /& <: c,
? (.'> ?i> c'
> ? > ?
o o
3oSo8cfcCc#c3cOc?oeo?cfcSoO
[ Mr. UiiwriT tt'ii:: ask" <1 1 ?y n stranger if
l.i> \v.:> the inr.ii \\ ln? kppt pug for
na: i;;iu v. 11. I a peg Willi a 1 Wist ill his
tail we..; worth. 'I lii' r< ply was so full
of exclamation |ioia(s ami plain Iingli.
h words thai the ] ig iln.g hunter held
| his I !''*:ttii till he Lot out of tin? yard
a:nl around the eorm r.
I "I'.y tlatudcr. but have i gut to go out
I lu.to the woods to writoV" growled Mr.
| P.owser us he banged the door shut,
j "Y< n left off at win re the mother re
turned an! was annua d," replied Mrs.
I'niVMi'. "and I've heen wondering if
the hah.v had swallowed the stove lainill
? r anything."
"Is that meant for sarcasm*'"
"No; of course not. Don't keep tr.e in
j *
t "'Veil. I shall relate that the baby
w.os found on lie other side of the
j room. having cliuihed out of it:- cradle
an-1 walked. Pretty paid, wasn't it, for
a kid of s'x mow hs'r"
i "It doesn't seem possible."
"l\rhi.ps not. hut it was so. I'roin
there I go 0:1: 'At the age of one year
this' wonderful child could walk, talk
atel sing and was the wonder of the
1 r.cighborhniid. lie \;:is hardly a year
an l a half old when lie anil Ids sister
were attacked by a large blacksnake
as they were playing in the yard *>ne
day. The sister screamed in terror and
was helpless, but the young hero' "?
I: was that bell again, ami Mr. Howser
went to tlie door and found a second
woman?that iit was the first
woman with a .different bonnet on.
She had returned to ask if ids name
i \v?: :i i ?<? in nil* Thorn an.I if ho wasn't
; lie party w! g?>i. her liu<hand drunk
j and then rolihed him of a M'aterbury
| wateh. SIio was sent away only half
' convinced to (in; contrary, and Mrs.
Ilowser was wait i:ig to say:
"lMcaso lnwry up. I am dying to hoar
what the young hero did."
"'Ho grabbed up a liatchot nttd
brained tlic serpent*?and hy the heard
of Captain Ki(hl if any one else gets
I mo to that door tonight I'll brain ldin."
"Docs a serpent have brains';"
| "Certainly. Kvery living thing hut
women lias them. Now keep quiet, atyd
, h t mo go <?n: 'At the ago of two yo.-frs
y.ning llowsor herd his father talking
of a gang of horse thieves that had
come into the neighborhood and were
supp ised to he lurking hi a certain
piece of woods. The child saiil nothing
fo his parent, lmt made up his mind tp
visit the woods and capture tlm gait?
j single handed. Due must smile at the
idea, hut let us wait for results. No
sooner had night descended than tholieioic
youngster, in whose veins must
llow the ldood of a Ikiyard, armed lamself
with the family butcher knife and
slipped out of doers and started for
the place mentioned. It was a dark,
rainy night and the distance three
lilies and the road a lonely one, but
I! i ill
^|||
K WAS NOT DUOKD.W
tin* undaunted lad koj?t on and finally'
" That
I toll Tor the fifth time! Mr.
Dowser clinched his teeth together as
he rose up to trot down the hall.
' I>on't?don't hurt anybody," pleaded
Mrs. Dowser.
"Hut I will! I'll annihilate whoever
I And there and toss his dead body
over the fence!"
Mrs. Dowser hoard the door open,
hot words pass, a struggle and a fall,
and by the time she reached it Mr.
Dowser lay on his back on the lloor,
with bis leas doubled up under him.
She lifted his head and found his neck
was not broken. She straightened out
his legs and found the knee hinges all
right. Then she returned to the sitting
room to pick up the pencil and write:
"Owing to the fact that Mr. Dowser
l?r't*!? vtnw*l: nn i ho h?\v tit liiu /\vrn
door l?y a would bo assassin and is still
wondering whore bo Is at as tliis paper
goes to press wo must out this autobiography
short and (ill up tlx? space intruded
for it with Ilcubcn's hair dye,
put tip in twenty-live cent, fifty cent
and one dollar bottles. None genuine
unless it smells like stale eggs. Uuy
at once, and take no other."
M. QUAD.
Donlitlr.K Dennis.
Judy?ill ye Rive me yor promise,
Dennis, that ye'll love me foriver?
Dennis -Sure, an' oi'd like to do that
saute, Judy, but Oi'ni hardly of the
opinion that Oi'II lasht as long as that.
- Ulehmond Dispatch.
I
muuhilw x'-1 ?r^rnmmm? ?I
I -4DR. I. h
Crown and Bridge
Work a Specialty.
1 - - - """"
Stepping; fas
THE SUCCESS!
FERTILIZES hi
The Virginia^Carol
"Manufactures the best
; Virginia-Carolina Chomicnl Co.,
I CHAHLESTON. S. C.
A?; nr.-.!.:-; .!>'> II ti? linml' * % litis*.
| r *' " f tli ' wile nssumi;
t'i- Ir.tsi . - ;it ii.:.rriatre url^i.
nnt' il -t ?h uian rttst. m an I hern:
,i- the e-?.:i: .mi ? i'isi after the :l?>j
man ??? -apat1' 11. '"it;.;. .Iu!ia ami < >e
tavia. tnarr ?d to t'oinp y and I'ieoro,
wcr > on!'.. ! by i! Komans Julia of
rompey-atd ( ,i. <>:' <*;. !<>. ami in
later 'times inurr! .1 w.un a in innst
Kuroyesr.i .*fi? s sVi.ed their names
; la I 111? s.-r.u ? at.-. un< :*. hat omitted the
"or."
.. .Against this v' w it may be m.-ntinnr:!
thai ?* iriu-" ;h? - Ixteonth am! ?vo?
at tl:?? In1 ;ia:.':.of tho seventeenth
cohVury (1; imam* s r!;;s ilollbtuii, J
v.c. r.nd <\?thei\ne i'arr itrrt- j
in; herself after she had h<-e:t t\vi<i? j
inat'i'i d. .".nd we al'.vnys hoar ?if Lady
JaiK" ?l;vy mc.t inuileyi, Aral -11a
Stuart \ Soy mean. ? :?. . Some peris
s il.i il; t!iat tlit" eustotu or rlnatml
l'r a 1h'< Scriptural toaohiiux that lit'.sh;
ad m.d '.vifo art" on*". This was tho
n;'. law s-> far ha. u as llraotan
t^;jod, ly>S,i. and rt was decided in the
O'aVc o. V.in versus Smith, in Iho rei;;i> j
of L!!i:~tbetli. that a woman hy r.utrrlr
. ? ! i-;:>s hoi* fo: . or : mie and loyally
receives the iiir.no of hor hush,and. 1
Altoyetlior tho . t!si..;n is involved in
nut-oil olisrurity.
. .. iJt;v Men.
StP.var< w. lis-* an ah -t of Ilimslnn Kenorals:
oriel;.the Ureal. David t.'arri<
;<. tho v.a.nd rfnl and Alexander
-Hamilton. v. lean Tailo;. rand pronounced
one of 111* liino yn.-yest inon
ho had ov? r known. wero s!.-n?hr and
111. iw in" i ii< il.111. The bravo '
lie:ii nil Marion "was in stature ?>f the i
smallest siy.r. thin well tis low." ami
1 :r. Kane. who surpass ?1 :;!t of his r. - '
tie companions in hravinjr torrid heat i
ami polar nilil, wa a hilt ."i f? et in j
In : :iit ami weighed ;it his host only lii."
pounds. I hit mi r<* dwarfish than any
of those :Ji< stly heinus was that phenn:,i'lien
<f the eighteenth century.
Hi Ahh Caliani of Naples. "I'its? nnlly."
s i.vs Marir.iin: I. the nhhe. who
w. ; hill 1 feet r ojole s Pi stature, was
the prei.ii .t litiie harlequin that Italy
ever i iialiiectl. Iiiit upon tli.- shoulders
of that harleipiin was 11 to head of a i
Maehiavolli."
'I'lie I'orlml;; ?>f itrnwtli.
Children I orn between September
and February ate, some authorities
stai.-. not as tall as those horn in sum- |
inv alid sprint; months, and the growth !
of children is tiitteh more! rapid from
March till August. The extremities :
(rrow rapidly up to the sixteenth year; !
I then tin re is a slow growth until tic !
I thirtieth year. The h as eltiefly : w :
between the tenth ami seventeenth
years. <'outpacing tiie general results,
it appears that there are six periods of
growth. The first extends up to tl:e
sixth or eighth year ami is one of very I
rapid aruwtli; the second peril d. front .
eleven to fourteen years, growth iu
low; the third pi rlod, front sixteen to
seventi u; the fourth period shows a
low growth up to the ago of thirty for
h sht. up to fifty for eliest girth; (lie j
* 'a p riotl is one of rest, the sixth a
o r< ase in tlie hotiy.
A Weak 1
Stomach
Tndigostion Is ofton caused by ovoreating.
An eminent authority says
t lie harm done thus exceeds that from
the excessivo use of alcohol. Kat all
the good food you want but don't overload
the stomach. A weak stomach
may refuse to digest what you eat.
Then you need a good digestant like
Kodol, which digests your food without
th# stomach's aid. This rest, and
the wlVdesonie tonics Kodol contains
Boon rostore health. Dieting unnecessary.
Kodol quickly relieves the feeling
of: fulness and bloating from
which ?>me people suffer after meals.
Absolutely cures indigestion.
Kodol Nature's Tonic.
Prep. roAonly by E. C. DkW ITT &OO.,Chicago,
TfaoSLQotU.coBUla.SViUisuUi.bOa Itu.
' i
4. ii AIR
Office BanV. Building
T Tl'mi. 8. C\
" eW-Wi HTijjMii*?uj|mr aini jm n???i
1
V . ^vtbr^\ *?* 't' - I*
kt?'Ao v ?
h' I < '
SSHBT -7 N
. )
I
s te bmsHn I
; U ' r
:UL PLANTER ||
S LANDS f '>
ina Chemical Co., |
Fertilizers on Earth*.
if
M. j
i"; J" r ** " " ' I
I i jij m \ |' 'iii*
| The Clothes Horse
.Nt t d pol I < l:o':di!. into r? (pii-i'lii n Vy
ihe i:ou-e-\i!V t.liat \>ittvi* z-s
The U-Need-A Steam Laundry.
Ail ffai'PiHiits, liiipp.-", ( lc, mo 1! i
nu^hly ?JW i??l I t Wilis lir wui.<r.? ii ? iwi
il 'WviTy siitd *. .!H {iiit in
I use when noMWil wiilniut four ?>t ilutip|
Tii'.^a \Vt? (l.? ::!l classes ?>f laimdet ifj.'
and do (111 Wfil .
U-Need-a Steam Laundry.
Standard American Annua!.
I sCL*1
life
4iJliWMa
ad ENCYCLOPEDIA
A Statistical Vclunic cf
Facts and Figures Ccntrinir.s C-vc:
. 600 Fanes.
' fen i^O&TOWCSj
Im'Mmeos&kctsl
riMICIAL FKATI'IIRS.
Hevl-W Hi i'jc Cnnl Pt ik--; tl:*? Trusts in
liiel jii'.r 1 i<la fi; lull t..k.'ition l{tt:i n* an I
* I~ I'liiilirms 01 INillli ?l /". **
!' r?ie? <>t l?>Oi. ill. l/v |
r.cr-: ot lire Na'ionn! I \l>4? ,.i>'
Cuumtll'e-s; I etlcral, I
Matea.hi l..i'.irl ei>is> ? :
ijJ>U5*>n "?'?"?: Ot lf.su ur
SSPCurt) il I'o-se-.-.ofs: l>t.in iun
~ ? Ciinul l.utv civil ' ?vo
mi cm tor tiic Pi i ij> nJl'iA'
t?ines; tjualii.ca:ions 5 ,*f ti
'Or ^ ? t i ii k in Ail
St ale** Autnmnli lo
: mi m is i rat.-r ;il.
i^<ipV\]t RUI ia*y a -il I a'r ot c <Tf6p^
xc/i'it- Ir/orn-Ht'on ; >? "v7.t
0-</<f/IiV I " ci'/n Coimi rios,
rfl f The r I- til r> t.r.il < i>\ ^
' erniv.cn I'. i .e lixI
),!' ,c'V> plot nl.c.i : Iv'cv.cw of -1
t|>\>7 ji Si onti'ic Ach -10- ' "'"'"gsjr.
ii.? ... m*i l?: 111 S.-i^nuc i. >
l>i.?lur',anCi.* o: I'O? ("Inn: 1'clcej; KccoD*
Si ruction of ll.c City of Nisw V? rk.
He .mufHiBimm ewi i?.m? .WWMT- iw? ?
Condensed Information fo.* the
Office, ihc Store and the Home.
i MiiLii i^aar- - -11111111 n ,w ? ? ? irn
Price jr?>*tfaid to any address 33c
,25c. Tin- WORLD,
On i.vorv j
N"V ' Mt'""n iiui;.fCr Building. Ne v Y.irk.
Nov, \i'ii?:?oril.
Noll -Mrs. Kitii :tl'.i>u: i' l-quoer says
hor husband was a p: i fi'ct nobody
when f in* r.iariioil him.
licllo?And now?
Nell Oh. now ho i.i Mrs. Iiiitenhouse
Fqueer's husband. - 1 hllaih Inhiii Hocord.
T'10 Oi'.iinir.if of (!:o riivt.
"l'ooplo in po'lile soole'y ilo not use
hall" oil," voi.iiii'l.eil the I'iistci'ii man to
his guest.
"! know H al," answered the Texan.
"The out anil out proper tlnnj; nowadays
Is petroleum."?Brooklyn Life.
w
??m?irW<???J
?c ?oeoec?o?ooeo?oeo#o#o#o?
0 o
1 Arizona Kicklets I
#
I O # o
! The Editor of the flicker Make* a 0
! o C
> f Few Explanation* 0
O
0c9oCoQo0ct eOo0cO?CoOO0o0
lOopyri;-ht. 1 -J. liy C. J*. Lewie.f
AMIWM'AI'KI! in t'nluiiihup, O.,
v:mv< |y :iin;<n;iu-rs lli.it wo aro
; < r-i<u::ii;\ t > i>|;mui> for nt leant
l won;,- I v11 < -i! 11 ls tii-it i>? > ?
t rl' 1! pine 1;< re W'.thill till' l;,st year
an I tii 1 i? 'thi'rr *< ' ins l< assuaj(Q
? '! for t ! mil. Thi ll- have been
i' 1 \ i ? Ji"i ^ s hiri> in livr yoarK,
: i v. e I :i i ; in I i.i l e out fir town in
vi- . . . A> ior n-.tr tliii>t fur blood,
i: sir >!; .* ;i j.-n-l; i':iI>1 lit without
I I >' i-i ti>> ! i.i-i- strii-Ui-n over it.
I _
"- ".ii' iti/i-ns ol' tirnss Valley did not
! 11 l?i to lyiti li us otie ilny las) sutnj
a-. ; stat. il in :i Santa l-'e paper
! ii : treat si ow of cniiiplaeerey. On
i-...itrary, on tin- oi-c.-ision referred
i ; i we wen- I.ivited hy forty nine differ
it i-iti/.i-ns to hike a ilrlnk with them,
i ,'iti'l en eh iinil every one of them sul>|
scribed to tin* Kicker.
Yi'e have tint tlifcatrued the lives of
rvr eiHt eitit'.ens in this territory in the
last live years, as published pi a San
, 1'raneiseo sheet. < hi the eninrary. our
1 own life lu.s heen threatened Ton times,
' an I we luive laid to do some lightning
! ilodytinK to save it.
| The pnrapr: ph ^nin-j the rontuls to
the ifleet that our uioiher-iu law dieil
under suspieimts eireuinstanees nets
wahhly in the knees when we state
that we are still an old bachelor and
jfver lia I a niother-ln-law to kill off.
The ? harm4 made against us in an
I'maiia paper that we ci h-intra ircd doe
i l'.aht- on Sunday lias 11<?t ;i grain of
tvu:li in i;. As a matter of faot. we
1< :i i tin1 eltureh olioir on Sunday forenoon
and assist in the Sunday sellout
afterward. and wo liavo no time to bo
bad even it' \vo wanted to. j
^ s
According to an item pulOjSogj/
St. l'aul Joun?"' j"**|
ce. You 'MM
Oft
mix. t,y two cent stamp or
hand and the only persons
ever driven out were those who hurt
lift d at us through the general delivery
window.
We do not secttre advertising for
the Kicker by calling upon business
I me; and displaying our guns, as statert
WE DO SOT SErriSE AIWEHTISINO r.Y DISI'i.AYlNOOUlt
UUN8.
in a Cincinnati paper of a late date. If
we any our nuns with us when out
on an advertising tour, it is merely to
protect ourselves in case the argument
should run into polities or rellnion.
We have not made threats to shoot
any man who had the nerve to run
against us as candidate for the mayoralty
of tliis hum. as announced hy several
pape rs in Indiana. At each election
for the last six years there has
been a rival candidate, and if he was /
snowed under it was because the elect- /
ors loved and trusted us. \ f
A Kansas weekly stops >ss press to
let ih" world Know that we shVrt.jlown
in ? hi t.lood a Mr. Stevens, principal
of t!ic Union school in <iivendam (iplch,
bci'ause lie disputed us on a historical
point. The otil\ schoolteacher here is a
Miss (?recti, and we liuil the honor of
escorting her to a birthday party less
than thirty-six hours ago.
We linve not shot and wounded three
different members of the < Jivend.-un
(iub-h common council witliin the last
year, as stated in a Denver paper. We
simply on one occasion split Alderman
Fin noyau's ear with a bullet to make
him understand that lie was out of
order.
The statement of a Cleveland paper
tluil we have shot down three different
liofs editi rs connected with the Kicker
would he malicious if not so absurd.
Kneli one of the trio received his death
miles away from the olliee and by the
hands of others, and in each ease we
paid the funeral expenses and expressed
our grief to surviving relatives.
M. QUAD.
SlflitliinK.
Hark, the sleigh holla' merry Jirigto ^
O'er the crackling Ice aiul snow!
Seems to sot >our blood a-tingle.
On the go!
wiwi your dearest girl beside you,
Snuggled up in furs and Puff,
Ami the starry night lo hide you;
That's the stuff!
Funny how the old horse poamprm,
Though you drive with Just one arm.
Something else the other hampers;
What's the harm?
?New York Times,
ft