The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, July 05, 1901, Image 3
..FOR
Next
* WE OFF
ENTIRE
Comrr
ju
June 25
-141 T r>!~ I
w. i. m
F. Q. Aust
HONEST ABE, U. S. M,
THE RURAL MAIL CARRIER ON HIS
DAILY TRIP.
He llenrn n Sr.<1 Tula* t''roin III run
Green About l'iireqni(e?l l.ove, nna
Mr*. Werner Tellaa lllni of n llrrnct
of l'roinlx1 Suit.
[Copyright, lOfal, by C. B. Uwls.]
When I got nlqng to Ilirntn (Ireon's
with his weekly paper the other ?lny
I found hlni pacing up and down it
front of his Rate in an excited state 01
mind, niul I hadn't time to ask him tin
cause of his trouble before he said:
"Say, Abe, I've been thrown dowi
with the darnedest kind of a kerwol
lop."
"Been wrassllng with your oh
*fl?uiieu uuii; r iiskcu.
' '' :
"thk wav thp.y hid sl'oov was som1
thing awful."
"No. You remember that my \y?i
died two years ?bo, don't you?"
"I believe I do."
"Well, I've been n wlddcrer ever sine
uiiu am joi, inougn u s not my ranl
Mebbe you've heard that 1 was sort <
spooking around the Whlder Carte
She Is n whlder, and I'm n whldere
and If seemed perfectly uateral tli:
\ye should hitch up together. I've bee
propping In on her every few night
for the last six mouths, and she a 111
seemed glad to see me. When I talke
love, she'd smile, and when 1 talked (
marriage she'd blush like a hen. Wh;
Abe, I was so sure tliat site reeiproea
ed my affections, as they call 'em, tin
I'd have bet 40 bushels of turnips ag'l
a peck of corn that 1 could carry hi
ofT any day."
"And what's happened?" I asked.
"Well, I went over there last nigl
to pop the question, and after slttlt]
around awhile 1 popped. 1 thought
was a dead sure thing, of course. In
the wldder riz up und give ine'the col
throw down."
"She refused you. you mean?"
"She did- uud she snoku in nlain En
>v'*
THE..
>0 Days
~ER OUR
j STOCK
fencing
th, 1901.
\1\ & CO.
til, rianager.
' llsu too. Yes, sir, she refused my heart
nud hand as plump as mud. and when
> 1 got outdoors I was so giddy in the
head that I walked half a tulle in the
wrong direction. Why. Abe, the shivers
are still creeping up and down my
back, and 1 can't hardly draw a long
1 breath."
"But she must have explained why
she refused you."
"Yes; 1 believe site did. She said our
i na?o i 111 iisiruiony or some
such thing ami that while I would be
j wanting boiled dinners she'd bo sighP
lug for quail ou toast. I didn't sleep n
wink all last night, anil 1 haven't eaten
any breakfast, and I'm taking it hard.
Abe. mighty hard. I'm kind of think1
' ing of eoinmitting suleide."
"Nonsense!" 1 said. "If one widder
won't have you. then try another."
1 "I can't. Abe." he replied, with tears
In his eyes. "When a man of my age
has got the cold kertlop. he hasn't any
spunk left. 1 shan't be no good to myself
nor anybody else for the rest of
my life. Abe, you are the government,
ain't you7"
"Well. 1 represent the postmaster
general, the administration, the United
States and the constitution, and if I
should meet a load of hay on the ro.nl
it would l ave to turn out for me."
"That's what 1 thought, and If you've
got to stop .at the widder"a this morning
1 want you to do tne a favor. I
want you to tell her that it's the opinion
of the government that she's made
the biggest mistake of her life and that
if she marries anybody else she'll have
hoils and toothache and rheumatism
all the rest of her days. Make it
mighty strong. A he. Make her feel
what she's missed by turning me down,
and give her to understand that there's
40 other wlddcrs iu this county who'd
jump tit the chance of marrying me."
1 promised him and drove olT, but as
l'r I looked hack and saw hit.i sitting ou
, the fence with his head in Ida bauds I
c knew that his heart was broken. I'd
lieard that I'nele Kit Warner was full
of trouble over his daughter Mary, and
0 as I drove up to the house I wasn't
t. surprised to see Mrs. Warner waiting
if for tut*. She had a club in one hand
r. and a package of letters iu the other
r, and was trying to look ferocious. It
it was a poor attempt, however, and lief
n voice trembled as she said:
ts "Abe. tuchhe you've heard qho^ ouj:
is Mai'I'1)!'
il "Just n little." says 1. "I hope she's
>f well nnd as good looking ns usual."
y, "No, Abe; she nlu't a hit well, and 1
t- shouldn't be a bit surprised If her splrit
it sailed away any hour. As for looks,
n she has aged ten years In two weeks,
r It's an awful blow on n girl like her,
you know."
"It's a breach of promise suit, ain't
it It?"
ig "That's It. Abe. You remember when
It tlioso fellers was here last fall with
it their wire fencing? I was ng'ltt It
Id from the start. 1 told ICI1 that It wasn't
natural nnd that nothing good "ooltl
conic of it, and 1 was a true prophet
One of tlio fellers fi*l! in love wltli
Mary. Maybe you heard about it?"
"Seems as if I did."
"You Must have. everybody was
talking. Yes. I e fell in love with Mary,
ninl she fell in love wllli him. and Use
way they did spoon around was something
awful. It didn't do no good to
talk to her. Mary Is like a mule when
the gets her mind made up. After the
feller had hunt* around here for two
weeks lie had to move mi. and then
they wrote letters to eaeli other. Here
are the letters lie wrote, hut after a few
weeks lie cooled of!' on her ami fell In
love with another. Wc are now going
to have him sued for breach of promise."
"Does Mary want to take the ease
Into court?" 1 asked.
"No, sin* don't, nor III! ojtiter, hut I'm
going to make 'em l'v?. ?.,? >>? a....
dor up and will light to the end. Eli
says we haven't trot a ease, and I want
to ask yon about it. Abo, when a fel- *
lor writes to a girl that he'd give the .
whole world for a sight of the tip of <
her nose he's In love, ain't he?" ?
"I should say he was." i
"And when he writes that he can't '
oat nor slot p nor put tip wire fencing
for thinking of her he's got it party
bad, hasn't he?"
"For sure." j
"And when he goes on to say that i
they'll live in a woodbine cottage and <
squeeze hands and listen to the songs 1
of the nightingales it moans that he
expects to marry her. 1 take it?" '
"It looks that"way."
"And when ho sits down and neorers
out tlint tlu\v cnn live on J?3 a week, *
when lie says Hint the world is :i hoi- j
low mockery without her, when lie <
writes that she's nn angel from heaven i
and has made him the happiest man <*
on earth, lie's committed himself, (
hasn't lie?" 1
"lie certainly has, anil I'm telling '
you so in my official rapacity."
"That's what 1 says to I'.ii and Mary, (
and I'm going to town to see a lawyer
and sue that wire fencer for MO.tmo 1
damages. Abe, I'm n Spartan mother." (
"What's 1 hat V" J
"I (luiino, hut I'm one of 'em. and *
I'll never rest till I make that feller
hopscotch. Yes, sir; I'll stand him on
his head and walk all over him and
crush liiin into the earili, and then M.a- j
r.v shall marry a millionaire and ride ,
over his dust In her carriage, (jooilhy,
Alu?. Just tell everybody that you've {
seen me and had a talk and that afore
I get through with this thing every ,
rod of wire fencing in thi-vx-ouuty will
be buzzing like u gale of \> .'id and hot j
enough to burn a hole through a sheepskin."
M. hi ad.
Healthy and strong ,
i I IvJ W LI c5a they blossom
11 and bloom. Sickly, they wither and
i die. Every woman ought to look well ,
i and feel well. It's her right and duty,
1 but she m:ght as well try to put out a
fire with C'l as to be healthy and at>
tractive with d sease corroding the <
1 organs that make her a woman. Upon
their health depends her health. If
i there is inflammation or weakening ,
1 drains or suffering at the monthly ,
, period, attend to it at once. Don't ,
i delay. You're one step nearer the 1 '
1 grave every day you put it off. 1,
| Women can stand a great deal, but (
i they cannot live forever with disease
dragging at the most cfolicate and
i vital organs in their body. You may i |
? have been deceived in so-called cures, i
We don't see how you could hplp It? ,
there is so nruch worthless stuff on
1 the market. Hut you won't be dis- 1
nppointcd in Bradfleid's Female Re^- '
1 ulntor. We beliove it is'ho one medi- '
' cine on earth for fronmnh ills. There 1
1 is us much difference between it and '
1 other so-called remedies r,a there (a
1 between right and wrong. Brudllc-ld's 1
1 Fenialo Regulator soothes the pain, 1
1 stops the drains, promotes regularity, 1 i
strengthens, purities and cleanses. It
docs all this quickly and easily and 1
naturally. It Is for women alonc'tode- 1
1 cide whether thoy will be healthy or
i sick. Br.id tie Id's Regulator lies at 1
1 hand. $1 p. r bottle at drug store. 1
Son i for our free buokUt.
THC BRAWii LI) Rt GULATOK CO., Atlanta. Ga.
i
Sti' fciibe for Tiik Timkh and ktfj>
llOSthd.
I
FOR SA]
A WORTHY SUCCESSOR.
"rioinatblrp New Under
tr v.~ w...-. I
I W(
All doctors linve tried to enrol
CATAItltll by the use of jtowders, acide, tilt
git.-es, inhalers ami drugs in paste form. , lea
Their powders dry up the nmcuotis |
membranes causing them t?> crack open ~ .
and bleed* The powerful acids used in |2g
inhaler* have entirely eaten away the ?&
Maine membranes that their makers Jsl
aimed to erne, while pastes and oint- Sa
ments cannot reach the disease. An old
and experienced practitioner wlm has jg?
for many years: made a close stndv and F*l
specialty of the treatment of CAT A I! K II,
has at last perfected a Treatment w hi'-h |?w
when faithfully used, not only relieves Hh
at once, hut permanently cures t' VTAUUH,
by removing the cause, stoji- ] gg
pi?its the discharges, and curing all in- Hwj
ilamation. It is t tie only remedy known jJL
to science that actually roaches the afdieted
parts. Tiiis wonderful remedy is gg
k no a-n as "SN Ul'l-l.KS the (IIJAKAN- i jHs
i'EE I) ('ATAWlill CUKE," and is sold j jp?
lit the extremely low price of One Dollar, . BW
pact, package containing internal and I
external medicine sutlhaent for a : W
mouth's tientment and evor> thing ne- ! HH
pessary to its perfect use. I
1; i r i.ii,? is mo oniy period 5-*^
3ATA HUM CUItE ever made ami 's : |8j
now recoj?ni/.e<I as the only safe nn?l j <spL
|K>sitive cure fur that annoying and ?'is- (
rusting disease It cures all iiillama- i
i?>? ^tU klv and permanently and is also
A'uikloffhlW uuick to relieve IIA V Hy
FEVER or COLD in fit* HEAD.
CATAliHH wtidT neglected often 3^
eads to CONSUMPTION?"SNUF- ?
PLUS" will save you if you use it at 2
nice. It is no ordinary remedy, Imt a
jomplete treatment which is positively guaranteed
to cureCATAUltH in any ""
term or stage if used according to the
lirections which accompany each pack- "
tge. Don't delay hut send for it at once, wii
mil write full particulars as to your con- "
lition, and von will receive special ad- (Id
rice front the discoverer of this won- j0fi
lerful remedy regarding your case with?nt
cost to von bevond the regular price
.f "SNIFFLES" the "liUAUA-Vl EED
J AT A lilt 11 CURE."
Sent prepaid to any address in the
United States or Canada on receipt of
>ne Dollar. Address Dept. 1 EDWIN
II. (11 LES <fc ('< ).M PA N Y, SKO and 2T.2 lie
darket Street, Philadelphia. Pa.
IG-ly
i ? s
5!ih1c ll!tr? Merv??>is. Ip'il
Bystander?Don't you fool to'riWy \? ]
torvous when you arc away up in tlit* 'an
lit*? iy t
Parachute Jumper? Yes, if there's a :** ?i
small crowd. pat-1
"What difference (loos the crowd w'!'
naheV"
"I'm afraid I won't get my salary."? |S "
S'ew York Weekly. * '\ot
* no
(TorrtSle Ili-vcmvo. , ( '
Mr. Drutle?I'm going to bring Cad * (,
eigh home to dinner oa Thursday. ? f
Mrs. Hrutle?Why, I thought you ,<
mtcd that fellow so! la sides. I'll have
0 cook the dinner on Thursday.
Mr. Ilrutle?Yes, I know.?Tldladel
Jh,n tim
The Itpst Liniment for strains. mJj.
Mr F. H Wells, the merchant it' gol
J ei Park, li >ng Island, N. Y., says:
I always it-coumiend f'handjeilahi's
1**11. ?? tLe b^stlmiiuobt forHtains.
1 used it l-i.-.t, waiter for it sevete lame- .1
iiifs in the sidr, resulting from a strain. ilai
nil 'v.is greatly pleased with ih- quick ?\c
ei'.ef and cure it * IT* clcd. For sale by am
F. (J. lJuke lh uugist, am
? me
The Y?> .! e. (P.',I|
Mother- .\o. .lohuav. sou have ha- V'
. ' wh
< >" u;,h. wit
Johnny ?Mother, it is im; -.-pihle t- tlo
have raoir h of your pie. jjw,
lie gets another piece. l'-esloa 'I ra: 1Vn
'r'nt .... . ciLi
? ?ii im< m, ^
"Miss tall* her new twit *n J
creation." "
"It is. There is eertnin'y p >th!p
flse in creation like It."- i'hiladelphi;. t
Itullotio. ^
Styod lllin I'p.
Mr l)o<Jl>roUe?M i>s tJoirox, will you tut
give me your hand? uo,
Miss Gotrox?Which band-the one I
carry my purse "in V- Baltimore American.
^ ^
A Superb Grip Cure. (|;
Tolinsori's Tonic is a suoeih Grip
mire. J* ives every trace of Giip P??i
-on f ont ilie 9\>tein Does it quick
Within an '-our it enters the hloud anc
liearins to nc.tmlize the liTVets of Mi- \
i>ii's<>n. Wi i in a day it places a Grq -fl
victim heyon the point of danger ,j;i.
Wil-hin a week, nddy cheeks attest- re- f|1(J
turn of |>erfent. nealth Price ">0 c-nte ir.
il it cures. Ask for Jolinpon's Chill ai d p^,
Fever Tonic. Take nothing else.
l?-1v
~TT~HOLMEr S
I
, 4.V <M
A Point to fomldor.
'I like n in:i:i who does not keep one
e on the tiuit? all ilu? while ho is
)ikhi^." said the employer.
'What if he is a watchmaker?" von ed
tlio employee.?Baltimore Ameru.
j A ?
|Subtle i
Foe |
Ilvsn iwi'i is >r> flsav i
hall' tin' eases. It ileeeiveu the Sc ,
unknowing su'leter. Its nsatiy %Sj! ,,
variations work along the weakest j
linos of the system. To battle 3&
against only one of thom is vain. !K! J
Our booklet explains its syinp- gj
toms. Our DyspepsiaTablelsgive l
ooinpleto aii'l lasting iv.iof.
GILES' i!
DyspepsiaTaaiets j?h
IOC., 2SC. - SS n
AND 50C. _
3- LL? BY UNION DRUG CO.
UNION, s. O.
A l*r??t t y Uootl Sj^n,
What makes you think she's iti love
tit you. Tom?"
Oh. she enlleil ino 'You horriil. menu
ni!' lust night."?Philadelphia Even
I'. ii I let in.
l.ocni Literary Ssicstiiii,
Stuhhs, is your new novel soiling
II?"
.mi, nui nearly nil the nohrhhors I
o borrowed it."?Chicago Itocordrald.
uramor complaint is muallv prevu- j
among children this A
! diVi-lo'fiH.' ease in the n ihe writers
ijiy win en red lust * ? -!. ly tlv lionise
of Cham! ei hihi's Cohe. Clinic :
D'airhiun lteiuedy?o.e. of 1 h. hes.
int medicit.es manufactured and
ic'n is always kept on h ind n' *hf
ne of ye scribe. This is i ot intended
i fioe puff for the cimvumv, wim
ertverti-e wi'k us, but to 1 ??ri< !! litsi
ITVreis who may not be within iji.-y
s of a physician. Xi> family shou d
ivivhout a bottle of 111is m?iliciu * it.
house, especially in sunmv- t.i-.n? ?
if'inj;. low.i. .lournal. Kot sale by 1- ,
Duke. Druggist.
, | r
Tlie Vu.v of nnalnor*.
OOkkeepcr-Tliis figure is an Iiulis i
that ! don't know whether to
ke out this man's hill for or ?S.
he Itoss- Make it out for fS, thou.?
movillo Journal. 1
The Same Old ry.
r. A. Kelly relates an exppilenee sfm
l.?? that wlpeb happei td in aim ?s<
ay te it'll in >i hood m 'lie Uni id St.iu*
l has b en t* Id a ?J*re-t.o!d by t houslnotOihera
II* >s: * I.a-l siuuf
I had an ?l nek dys Miry and
chased a IjoU'.i f ( Is-iii1e. h.in*!ic,
i hoi-1a a' I !t * a 15 n.e.ly.
icli I uffd ace !rtli- <T to il ti -i.s> ami
It entirely *-aiii>fiU"orj result-. Tie
ubie w?? ontr<.l! d nine : ijui ;ke)
p. f.?m? .itin ks w ii; ii 1 uv.d
u-die- " Mi K'-liy is a veil 1 i. >w i. 4
/. ii ..I iI 'tulerson, N. C. l or .salt.
fe\ U. Duh.t>, Druggist.
Overent liiim ' *t jx Him. 1
Taw." said Utile Wtli'.n (iottil. "j::vo ]
> 10 cents to 1? j.* a stor.v hook with."
Ton cents;" sli !? I ' ll I ho old ir< :ir lout.
"Do you tli'.ti!. ! aiu An ly Car- <
gle?"? Haltiiiioro An i: -an. ! (
Till* C'HIIHO.
'irons Manager?What's all that row
tlio dressing room?
Ittendant? Oil. the man w!io walks
rofoot on swonls ran a splinter in
i foot.?Ohio State .Journal.
IJenHh Office Hours.
IVill l?e in my ndice, at the Council :
aml>er, from 10 a. m to 12 m. every
f, Sundays and holdnys except* d, tot
( convonii nee of oil zons wishing burial .
niits or to transact any oi hot business 1
tainiiur to tlie ollice.
10- -t I . W. D II Aums
ifStam"
\c MOORE'S PHA
\
w 1,1 r" i-ML !S?
TIJVIE
o u?:l a good Watch for h lit tie money.
\ b;.. line of lb.Id Killed Watehert that
it :-?! s ?l?l a* any price. Vou need h
rate It and t\<t tun! the mom V. So now
< tImtt to axrhanpe to your advanuge.
Youirtfor Wulclas,
VI. E. TINSLEY.
I don't want my (Viler ntr.n to de?<*nd
loo iiiiiCt! upon my iiiU'jrrit.v. It's
n'lTiity tt> 1 ?? told <!at yo' Jim nn
ucifst. co.:s?:miti'r.is man. hut it nru
ilsti nsif.l.ty provu'iu to run across "a
union paleli next day r.inl liavo to linng
n to yo'srlf wld honf bauds on miss
i go<K\ shtrnr. i* t
Look Carefully
To Your Kidneys
Dr. Jenner's
Kidney Pills
cause the kidneys to work as
nature intended they should.
They build up the shrunken
walls of the kidneys, as no
known remedy has been found
to do before.
As a cure for urinary troubles
they have no equal.
10, 25, ?0 Cents h*
SOLD BY UNION DRUG CO.
1 N i< >N. S. (
Not MIm Fault.
Oj1?,So you wish to inary
Idlr.ai.eth. ? n0? are in debt,
es. sir.'
"How did von g< ( in debt?"
"1 fell in love with your daughter."?
dfe.
Don't Force
Your Bo'-u>els
with harsh minerals which
always leave bad after-effects
on the entire system, and where
their u.sc is persisted in, tend to
completely wreck the stomach
and bowels.
..USE..
Edgar s Cathartic
Confections
The only harmless, vegetable,
:owcl regulator, and liver vitalizer
icnown.
As pleasant to the taste as
:andy, and as positive as the harsh:st
mineral. No gripe or pain.
S3S? 10, 25, 50 cents.
SOLD BY UNION DRUG CO.
rxus. c.
The man who woke us tin at midnight
the <>!her night hy heaving a cobblestone
through a front whitlow of
The Kicker nilice Inn! got a good start
as we threw up the sash and tired at
him, hnt we tl.ink we winged him hy
the way he limped around a corner. tVo
are always ready for little surprise parties
and always do our host to mako.
them entertaining. M. Quad*
RNIACY.