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A TRICK Fiiij i Der German Cobbler Hangs Out a Warning. POETS TOLD TO PASS ALONG. All Customers Were Rhymers and Insisted on Speaking Samples?Each Left Work, and That Was Just What the Dutchman Wanted. By M. QUAD. [Copyright. 1910. by Associated Literary Press.] NOT s.? much asli one shoe vitas ill my shop lo he lised oop, und I vbns so ha id oop dot I believe I shall shump into der river. Before i do so. however. ! litrht rnr nine tmd wallc out f.?; a leetle while to think. I think untl think uutl think, uml vhon 1 vhas h. ine again 1 Thas all i\. O. Dot evenings I paint me a sign nml bans her in dor window. She vhas his letters untl she roads: "Notice.?Dis vhas to warn all poets to keep nvbay from me untl bring me no work. Took notice und aet accordingly/' Mv wife ean't make it out und asks me some questions, but 1 say nettings und go t<> bod Marly in dor morning d >t leet!e Herman tailor conies in untl looks around und says my peosness vhas busted ail to smash uud 1 vhas a min <1 man. 1 keep still und say nettings. He vhas shttst gone avhay I II wj | &RM6NO rjS$3?STvl VOf^K- r ij W.m 'MB &j??mpM | SION A..A1N.-T BUVMl.:;s. vben a woman uiit two pairs of shoos to be fixed oop comes in ash bold as a lion. "How about dot sign?" she says ash she looks at me. "He vhas all right. If you vbas some poets you cau go right out." "Oh. I can. can I? Mobbe you dou'f like poets?" "Vhell. it don't make no deefereuce to me vhether you do or not. Here vhas some shoes to be fi^ed oop. und if you don't do it I shall raise a row dot shall rip dor shingles off dor roof. It vhas.u pretty how-do-yon do dot you vhas down on jR>ets. I vhas a poet inysolf. und I like to see you keep me out of dis shop. Listen to dis und den talk of Shakespeare: "A mashing young man In Detroit Tr'ed to flirt with a girl from Beloit, But she gave him a stare Dot curled his red hair Und/busted his mashing exploit." She waves dor old shoes around her bond ash ash repeats, und vhen she vhas finished she says: Warned by a Woman. "Dot vhas poetry. Mr. Cobbler, der genuine stuff, und it vhas all my own. Yes. I vhas a |H)et. uud 1 defy you. If you don't mend dose shoes by tomorrow you vhas a goner." Three minutes after dot woman goes out a mau comes in. He wants some heels on some shoes, und be slams 'em down uud stands back und says: "So some poets vhas not wanted In dis shop. I see?" "No. sir." "Vhill you tell me vhy?" "Because I don't like poetry. He makes me tired. After I hear some poetry I can't sleep nights." "Oh. you can't! Dot vhas too bad! Let me say a few words to you. you old peg driver, f vhas a poet, und you shall do my work or I go by der l?olice. Hearken to dis: "A boy stood on der burning deck; A goat stood by der bill. D 'r boy vhas named John Henry Jones? Der gout vhas only Bill." "VhellV" 1 snvs vhcn he vhas done. "Vhell. 1 v!i:is a poet, tint! dot vhas poetry, und if it makes you all tired out I Alias - lad of it. Here vhas shoes, sir?shoes i.? be mended. I>on't you dare refuse to do my work. If you don't know dot a poet vhas a bigger men dan der president of der United States und twice ash dangerous you vbas a fool. Now. sir. I say to you in der language of der poet: "If I come lo re in vain tomorrow I'li make your heart most sad with sorrow. Rijht here amidst the pegs und wax I'll bring about a grand climax." Two Verses by Anudder. Dot man vos gone out six minutes, mebbe. vhen a second woman comes in Sheuilso has some shoes to be fixed. She puts 'em down uiul clasps her hands und rolls her eyes und says: "Der vinter winds vhas blowing chill; Der fro.-t vhas in "der air: Der autumn leaf it vhas no more, Xo more der tlowers fair. "It gives me pains to look around Upon dor landscape drear. Und I vhas werry much afraid Next spring 1 won't be here." "Vhell?" 1 asks as she looks at me. T i "Vi:. .. .1 ,1 ..7;...' lot ii ink in." she i poet. ! x iris ai. !i;jys a j?. , nlvbays be some poets. dor work inn woman down > can't play dot game <>n a po i \ vhas iHMind to ri ;e oop untl s.ar ::\ on dcr wings of der i.iorui'i:;. iimi takes si seat on der sun ki > il ele*.. of der east." "Vliell. some more;" "I>ere vhas no more Von fix <m. . dose shoes or 1 break your lie k forgot to say dot I vlias a strapper a si vliell ash a poet. Farewell." 1 have three days' work on hand i now und 1 vhas beginning to hu?.l< ' vheii a tall and solemn man comes m l?y golly. hut he has a whole basket ful of shoes to he tixed oop. mid he l stands in der middle of my simp und j holds out his arm untl says: "So poets vhas not wanted in dis old cobbler shop';" "Not a poet. If you vhas one. po avhny." "Vhas poets turned nvhav because (Jrv van* poets: "IVt vhas it. lie makes mo I!?* *! "* "Itasoborn < '<] shoe pepper. It < nin<>t be. It shall nut be. I vhas nut uiily poet myself. hut l>y dor azure skies of summer it vitas for n:e t" : champion ami defend the profession. Hans, yen ul<l dunderhead, let your soul awake while 1 repeat: Sample of Forty Stanzas. "Dor risfni: sun seemed made of s<>'d, i.ikc poms i1?t s;>arklinp <! *v; A hundr<<l trills tier lark gave forth As ,;ayty up lie tlew. "Dor soent of roses filKd He:- air. !?er south waul gently signed. Dei- hi no!; it whispered lovingly. As nt.v dear Florence died." "Vliell;" 1 says ash he look at me. "Ifere she vhas. eohhler??!er sweetest uiul most heautiful thins ?'ver ' penned hv mortal hand. I tirst wrote | it on a shingle mit a lead pencil. Can you heal it. you old et ment j?ateher? J Vhill she ever he lieateu? I'ere vhas forty more verses, und each one vhas 1 a stem by its?>|f." "l.'nd viiat of it? No poets van ted here. Don't you see dor sign?" "Of course 1 see it. you slabsfded ! old sun of a pun. but you cau't blnff 1 me. Fix oop dose shoes or you don't I live a week longer. 1 can see und j write of dor beautiful in nature, und I can also come in here in two days und knock your head off if dey vhasn't j ready fur me." Und tuore ash ten other poets came j in dot day mit shoes to mend, und ' vhon dot lectio Cor.nan tailor hears of my pood luck he lifts oop his hands j uiul proa ns: "I don't trade .S'J in three days! | Whv cau't I he sonic fools like you?" ! i What Every Golfer Knows. That lu' is in hard lu< k. That ho isn't playing his stamp. That it is the caddy's fault when he dill's a shot. * That somebody always moves when he tries to putt. That he will make a much better score the next time out. That this is the first hall he has put in the poml since goodness knows when. That every had shot is attended by some extenuating circumstance. That nobody else ever plays and gets the tough lies that lie gets. That he is taking the game altoget her too seriously. That the caddy knows well enough where the Imll is and will get it in the morning. That his ball can usually be found about fifty yards short of where he is looking for it.?St. Louis Post-Disnatch. I * Making Sure. " I ' Madge? I.et's play he loves me. f " he loves me not. I Marjorie? Wait. dear, till I get J i < one with the right number of I i || leaves.?Puck. T , H .A Puzzled. As she picked her hobbled way down the street the observant man marked that she wore a black band about her golden hair, another about her alabaster throat. Iler waist was circled by another band, while her martyred an, kles were handcuffed with fashion's i latest crime?the hobble skirt. "I wonder." mused the man, "which dho of 'em is her belt."?Kansas City Star. Catching On. Timid Lover (glancing at his watch) ?Well. 1 must be going. Miss Dora. Time presses. Miss Dora (losing all patience)?I suppose so. Nothing else presses. ? * IIow dare yAu? Stop. (Jeorge! You're mussing my hair!?Chicago Tribune. Same Man. "Jones is the same old easy mark he j used to no. "Is that so? I remember he let his mother choose his wife for bim." "Yes. Ami now he lets his wife buy his neckties."?Cleveland Leader. . Food For the Gossips. Mrs. Tattles?All sorts of stories are | grointr around about the Nucumbs. Mrs. Snooper?No wonder. They have been liviug in the neighborhood ! ti.v weeks and nobody knows anything Ibout them?Chicago News. If the Wagon Doesn't Wait. If the wagon Isn't waiting. If the driver's lost to grace, Rise up with the morning And beat it in the race! Never join the regiment Tnat loafs along the line. Away with all your wagons When the walking's mighty fine! ?Atlanta Co:.s" r '.n. j / V... 1 Ji Y K -' -S i ^ ) /-? * \ )-1 fcHr <w"; * ifinf V-'. : -t 8?' ,% , 4 ^j>v' V v-^'" ? ' _e/ lOorvrlght. 1!>'0. bv Ampriorin Press Association. J I'M a? hapny j* a bird. Santa Claus. Foi ! in sure that you have heard, S.-.nln Cl.au.. How ! ra liop:.~. ever.- c'.-.y That you're really on your way And that soon we'll heat your sle.gS, Santa Claus! OH, the dolls. Santa Claus! Oh. the toys. Santa Qaus! Oh. th? happy, happy, happy girls end he vr Oh. hovs nu":.l) well s<ng When we I: '.: yet *ighhells rin^, For we lo* e |!!i? es.-iy.hing, Sar.'a CI;.u;' Wk f I ^BlklLe I OH, I h'tir yout bells ringirg, Sar.ia Claus 1 rearer can keep from singing, Santa Clam! Oh. such gladness and such joy To each l.!ile girl and boy Comes vvh'-n you are drawing nigh, Santa Ciaus! OH, the dolls. Santa Clausl Oh, the toys, Santa Clausl Oh. the happy, happy, happy girls and boys.' Oh, how merrsly we'll ring When we hear your sleighbells ring, For we love bke everything, Santa Claus! NEW "CHRISTMAS CAROL." Not by Charles Dickens, but an Incipient Parody on His Famous Story. liar ley was dead to bcpiti with. lie : was as dead as a doornail which must be goiny some in the dead line, as peont?? h-ivn been usintr a doornail as a simile ??f death fur several ceuturies. j But Smoodge was alive and kicking. Smoodge kicked particularly against j Christmas presents. lie didn't believe in Christmas presents. Barley, his old partner, dead these seven years, hadn't believed iu Christinas presents either When Suioodge shut up his warehouse and w?nt home on Christmas eve?he lived iu lodgings that had been Barley's?the doornail assumed an expression which he had never noted there before. The head of that dead doornail resolved itself into the head of Barley. "Hey. Jacob: 1 thought you were dead!" cried Smoodge. "So 1 am. Ebenezer." replied the vitalized doornail, "but I've come back to warn you that you will be visited at midnight by three ghosts, one after the other. So loug. Eb!" Barley's ghost again became a dead doornail. Smoodge went to bed and promptly at midnight was awakened by an apparition. It was the drst of the three spirits. It seemed to crawl out from under his bed. It danced on the footboard of the bed. "i am the Ghost of Christmas Present Past." said the spirit. "You look to me like one of those slippers my niece gave me last year." I said Smoodge. "You win." said the ghost and vau- ; ishcd. Presently the second spirit arrived. ! doing a merry dance over the washstand. "You look to me like another slip- ' per." said Smoodge. "I am the Ghost of Christmas Pres- ! ent Present." said the spirit. "Ha. I see!" said Smoodge. "You're | one of the slippers my niece is going 1 to give me this year." Whereat Spirit No. 2 smiled and va- 1 moosed. In a jiffy the third of the promised j snirits came in. It jumped upon the i bed and shipped Smoodge in the face. "I'm <?n." said t^ioodge; "you're another slipper." "I : ?n the Chost of Christmas Present Future." said the spirit sepulehrally. "Yes. I know." remarked Smoodge. "My niece u ill present you and your mate to ine next t.'ltristmas. Because I'm an old man she never sends me anything bat slippers, lint these ghostly vis'ts have taught me a lesson. Hereafter I'll ue a better man. I'll give my niece a Chnnteeler hat instead of the usual pair of gloves, and , maybe uext time she'll give uie a silk [ topper." T. SAPP. j 11.. iii?& <&! ?X;0; ^.SXXXXXXXX fS jo Zour Ears; o * , , x U jC'u .:iterest x 7 ir ^ X ' ' - '* V/ OH. X X 1 .* > \ V ? A . : - ? f; ;b , . . - . .. ' , som- 0 fl; ' O . * r? . . : i/lre X .1 ' . X V ?s^3!!S A ^ - ' 8 ; | Vo ; ,V\V A X infv*r.; .i. . X v Comrr-erda' Savings Bank, U f ? ( _ _ ^ w i&FivStOP, y C CAP.'DL - - - $100,000 >$ V v ?.A/yv v..- .'V^ V^-'V\rs.'S^V'^yYVr"YVV'tf *f* J V'^v'VVW^ *V -/V*v/SA/h/VVWV\ Q)i- J iJL'43?3S^SS?^?SSSS2S3f^ ? shoes s 8 ' $ 8 "-? 5 9) 9\ fA We have all Styles and Prices ^ ^ of Shoes for every member of '? '$ the family. ft will pay you to ^ ^ see our fine before you buy. : : ^ (? (J f) =^. 'k . (4j ? stackley's eet goods company * (i Cw CSSSSSCSSSCSJSSCSCSSSCSCSCS One Dollar, Persistence 1 and Our 4?k> interest THE LUCKY TRIO FOR YCU | SAVINGS DEPARTMENT g 4?|o Interest Compounded Quarterly | The Wee Nee bank solicits savings accounts of all classes. ft ! Accounts may be opened with one doliar or more. Added ? S to or drawn upon at any time v ithout notice Greatest pos- g B sible degree of safety. Highest rate of interest, g Commercial Department g| We solicit the commercial or checking accounts of firms, I corporations and individuals. We assure our customers of fc | every convenience and accommodation which a safely man- 1 U aged bank can extend. Pay your bills by check. Conven- j? E ient and absolutely safe. & | WEE NEE BANK, Kingstree, S. C, I b Officers Directors 8 HUGH McCUTCHEN KlgSS*. f | ^resident. T.K.Smith # | W. V. STRONG, j. K. Smith g I Vice-President. \y r Scott ? 1 E. L. MONTGOMERY, rl. E. i'iontg^rr.ery $ I ? Cashier. W. B. Cooper Sy ?BMiJii<uflmg3MyKWBr BBias AreWeldedi "VB T?/? / tho modem method of com* HHbJ ' U through th* elimination c SSHfkv JmJQ&rW tim A wrap holda moisture. eracka the galvanizing 1 wire. A small amount of displaced galvanizing c I ' : the protection against rust at the electrically * nwSL Stays cannot slip. They are always just wnere *C: become one piece when the anion is made. The i ei "?'" Every Rod Is Guars :Dont allow your prejudice in favor of the rapidly* have heretofore known, to warp your good judgme jt^R "Pittsburgh Perfect" fences represent progress, 1 J^a^r worth of standard material is daily welded by electn The hoop oa the average sugar barrel in the isolated country grocery store is an electrici Kg made in a large factory, its tires were welded by electricity, jou will find electrically \ washing machines, on many tubs and buckets. Examine them. |fl ** PITTSBURGH PERFECT '* fences are made by this modem, simple and marvelous pn "THE WELD THAT MELD." lS| Mm r?|MMAM USTEM MOW/ Every agent hamffing "PITTSBURGH PER |HB MTMmm m MM WmM%Sm fences Unauthorized togaarantoe thisl B| That the wires are not injured at the Joints?That the fence to perfectly adjustable "90 to uneven ground?That the stays will not separate from the strands.?That the^^ I fence is all right in every particular. k Coo Id you aak any more definite protection T Your complete satisfaction is . absolutely assured. ui E "Pittsburgh Perfect" Fences ^ Farmers' Supply Company Bi?p5p / ;j Hunt Your Bug| | . c i'i make it look like i A n v is. sin. ik tail is [ml. J In ;-i artce by painting. / ^ / 3 Wbeelwrl v \ } Horsesho! X-f and Gen, Repair/ - % ?n sbor; ' \ : I lire. | Bring Us Your T/o; W.M. Vause & ? i 6-io-tf / * Registration ftoti , Toe oilier of the Supervisor ^ ' ii vv: iI he open on the It; .n each i --nth for 'ho purf' : : " - S ?-i*I:: * r: V Oersoft wilo is ; r.i'ms: ' 1 ^ !i snail have been a resident . the staie tor two years, and of the m! . one year,and of the polling p?v ii.ii in which tie elector oilers to .vole four months before the day of election, and shall have paid. six I months before, any poll tax then due ami payable. ami who can both rc.o j and w rite any section of the consfcitn( lien of Is'.lo submitted to him by the j j Supervisors of Roj^istratioii. or who i can show that lie owns, and lists pa: > ' I all taxes collectable on during r) .(present year, pioperty in this State I assessed at three hundred dollars or 1 | mole. J, Y. MctilLL, ( lerk of Board Summons for Relief. (COMi'l.AdNT NOT SKKVED.) i Til V 5T ATI' nPCOITTH C4 111 ll I V A , : COUM Y OF Wll.UAMSUt'KG, i . C >urt of ? um'iit.n i'icas. !! Marie i) llarrtdson. in Iter own rlgl t ! and as administratrix of the estate of ! Maii^ V: HI ikelcy, deceased, iwestate j Plaintiff, against K ' Dunlop, \V j i>unlop. D J Dunlop, K i. Lo ed. I> 0 But.rue and The Geo g !o > n G'orery" acot| [>? !ation iln.v organized unf!er the taws of t1 e : taie of b utii Carolina | 1) fi-nda' ts To the f > ! nd nts above naord: ? 1 j You arc hereby -o.mmonrd and ro? ! quired tf answer th<* complaint in thi> action, of w!iic!i a copy i- herewith 1; served upon you at.d lo -one a copy of ! your answer l? t lie sa d complaint on . the sub>criber at hi' office at No 12-?S? 1 Screven St,Georgetown,So Gar. within i twenty days aller the service hereof, exclusive of the day of >?uch servicery"? I :ind if you lad to .answer the complaint { within the time a Ion sail, the plaintilT in thi- action wdl api?ly lo the Court j for the relie f demanded in ti e < oinplain'. Dated September A D 1'Mo. -j H I. Smith. Jk, / 1 I Plaintiff's Attoune-f. To E G Dunlop. W J Dunl u. did D J Dunlop noii-ie-id'-nt Defendants: ? Take Notice: -liiat the compl i:t in this action and a su onions of wnicn i the foregoing is a copy were ii ed in the office of the Clerk of Court of C >m i.vi PlEas for Williamsburg county, Sou'h Carolina.on :he 2:Jrd day November. . ; 1010. ii l smith, du j 11-24-61 P.aintiff's Att rne.'. Estate of Charles F. Timmons. Pursuant to an order of the II t? j Geo E Prince, Presiding .Fudge. made i in t he case of Etta Timim.ns, phiinurf, j again>t G? orge M Timmons et al, ti'< fend a tits, to me directed and uai? d 1/eI eember 2, 1910, notice is liereby tha'all creditors ot the e-tvte f-aid ( liar es F Timmons must j roem th r . i minis d?i!y :itt- st d.io me on or bef? re , ihe '.2nd uay oi Ikcmber. 1910; ;? J j it any creditor fail to pieseut his or | in r claim within the timeai< res-ud. he I or >he -dial) be debarred fmm theluni etits of any deem* that m >y liereaiter j be made' i>. tliis r use. Robki:t J Kirk. i2-8-3t Referee. tpod something Infinitely^ S Id style wrap or clamp* EH gh Perfect" * / VICES 11 by Eiectriciiy E ? t ruction. Yetra of lift arm added W* if aarioua tanco defocta. and allow3 the water to attack the bar* in"PITTSBURGH PERFECT"reinforces BE 'elded joint; examine the joint )i^K they were pat. Stay and strand wiree ice is like a solid sheet of perforated steel. HV mteed Perfect A 9 leclining and now antiquated methode'yoa oecause hundreds of thousands of dolass city. mr illy welded product. If your wagon was welded hoops on ice cream freezers and JU seees, producing