The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, June 09, 1910, Page FOUR, Image 4
She (fount!) itecotd.
KINGSTREE, S. C
C. W. WOLFE.
EDITOR AND PROPRIETOR.
Entered at the postotfice at Kingstree.
S C. as second clas> mail matter.
TELEPHONE NO- 83
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THE COUNTY RECORD.
THURSDAY, JUNE 9. 1910.
Ganderbone's Forecasts.
, We are giving our reader? this
week a column of genuine, copyrighted
humor. This is a sample
of what the large papers pay lil>erally
for and are eager to print.
To quote the author and originator
of the "Ganderbone Forecast"
The sole province of the "Ganderi"bone
Forecast" is humor, and hu
mor has just as much a place in a
small paper as in a large one. It
isn't getting it in the average
small paper, hut that's only one of
the reasons why it is a small paper.
'The country editor who knows this
Sias discovered what has been known
in the metropolitan newspaper office
a long time. Humor all that
saves any paper from the common-j
place, and the man who can write it
or draw it is more in demand than
any other newspaper worker of our
time.
Now, we are well aware of the
fact that a large percentage of
our readers will regard the ' Forecast"
as arrant nonsense and won?ler
why we bother to print it.
Not every one is endowed with a
sense or appreciation of humor.
At the same time we believe that
.among our readers there are a
large numlier who do enjoy good,
clean, wholesome humor and it is
for the benefit of these that we
contemplate the creation of this i
department. Among a considerable
numlter of readers it is impossible
t<> get < n class of mat"
tor that is pleasing to all and we
have long since quit trying. The
liest we can do is to aim at as
much variety as possible, in the
hope that some stray thought or
sentence may strike a responsive
chord fn the heart of every one
?>f our readers.
. Now, to return to our subject:
we can get the "(ianderltoneV
monthly forecasts as a regular
feature of the paper, hut it will
??>st us something I resides the expense
of type-setting. Is it worth
paying for? By this we mean,
does it appeal to a sufficiently
large number of our readers to
warrant our giving it the space?
Y.'e want you to tell us. If you
like the "(Janderlfone" and want
_ more of it, drop us a card say
ir.g so and \ye shall he delighted
To make it a regular department,
provided the demand is strong
enough. We cannot afford, however,
to pay for this class of
matter and use it simply as a
"filler." %\Ve want to know that
e 'I
it is K'ing read and appreciated. '
Let us hear from you. Just a
postal card and a little time are
all required.
Time to Act. (
For several, years past the com- c
mercial interests of Kingstree have N
suffered through inadeouato cotton !*
r
ginning facilities and it is sur- ?
prising that the business men of
the town should allow such a t
condition to exist for so long a ^
time. This year, we a:e informed, |
there is as yet no certainty that ^
a modern ginnery will l>e operated {
of sufficient capacity for the prompt
and proper handling of the cotton i
that would naturally l>e ginned N
h re. The tendency seems to be
c
to put these things off until necessity
forces action and then ^
there is no time for equipping and
installing machinery for a new and , ?
up-to-date plant such as the town s
l>y right should have, and the old, *
machinery is patched up to last ^
through another year. ?
With proper ginning facilities
to attract cotton here the number
of bales ginned during the season
could well nigh l>e doublet!, '
we are reliably informed. Think
what this would mean for our town!
Every business here would l>e
benefited, because it is safe to
conclude that where a man gins ^
his cotton he is apt to spend some s
of the money for which he sells it. s
With these facts before us how ?
can we lie supinely on our backs 1
I
and turn deaf ears to the call of
opportunity? s
The business men of Kingstree t
should get together before it is too t
late and provide for a ginnery of ?
the latest and most improved type v
to 1h? installed here in time for the
ensuing season. The time to act |
is now; our temporal sa'vat ion I ^
depends on it. Unless we are up, 1,
and doing other towns will outstrip ^
us in the keen competition for busi- 1
g
ness and the efforts of all these
years will go for naught. Just ^
a little effort, just a little energy, v
is all that is required, hut there i
is no time for delay or pnx'rasti- f
nation. *
t
Halley's comet and the BoydBrock
controversy seem to have
eome in for undue newspaper
prominence, considering their intrinsic
insignificance.
An esteemed contemporary
ix?asts of a new hearse among
the industrial improvements of
its town. It takes a lot of eni
thusiasm and optimism to lx>ost -]
a town on the basis of a hearse j
"filling a long-felt want." c
We are in receipt of an exchange
copy of "The. Mullins. f
Messenger," Volume I, Numlier 1, d
with Mr James Norton as editor. v
The new paper is a nVatlv print- 0
a
ed six column quarto and the
editorial coluii>n is plentifully Havored
with tahaseo sauee. Judg- s
ing from th6 animadversions of s
the Messenger local polities must j ^
he at a sizzling degree of heat .r
in the thriving municipality of i ^
Mullins. ,
A very good way to size up the j
merits of a newspaper is to ask j
yourself the question: ''If the editor
were to die would the paper
igo on?" The Record has Ihhmi
I'4 ? f. ,1. n?<ir1r > nil:irter
| going on io? .. n
of a century. For this reason
alone it has a fair claim for ]>ernianencv.
so that our over-cautious r
.It
suhscrilx-rs incur small risk in
i s
saving the "quarter" hy paying I j
i
in advance. Like Tennyson's y
"Brook", The Record can say: a
"Men may come and men may go,
P-'t I go on forever." \
^vv%v\v\wwwwwwwww |
> GANDERBONE'S FORECAST ? |
| FOR JUNE. J
{ Copyright. 1010, by C tf Keith. J i
>WVUV\\UVWV\V?WVU
Beside a day in June, my dears,all
)ther day are nothing, for then it is
>ne's eager ears may hear the soft
vinds soughing by forest ways, aud
)erfect days of brightly flowered
neads and joyous song are come
tlong just like a string of beads.
A poet one time asked us what is
ipradvent.nre like it. and died well
snowing we had not the wit required
.0 strike it. He simply tried, before
le died,to give us one so hid we'd
vork at it till time shall quit,and by
he gods he did.
The breath of summertime shall
ouse the festive calf to action, and
vhat with unrestrained carouse,he'll
1 > for an attraction. He'll buck and
lance around the manse in no great
ihow of grace, and wave his tail
vith brave assail in Mr Halley's face.
The heavy-droning bumble-bee
ihall kiss the blushing clover, and
ikies as blue as any sea shall bend
;he planet over. The graduate shall
ight the State from Maine across to
ifuma, and the groom in 6tress shall
5 0 S his dad for more mazuma.
Of June it may be said, indeed, ^
It is a great invention.
And one we rather badly need
To somewhat ease the tension
If we're to fish, to loaf and wish.
. Or hearken Nature's call,
We'll <lo it soon or late in June,
Or not do it at all
The comet, having hung about unil
we were converted, shall graduilly
peter out and leave us quite deerted.
We must recall we are not
ill the world it sets aright, and bid
t speed where there is need to cause
mother fright.
It is a sort of cop upon a beat of
rreat dimensions, and must by then
>e getting on to scatter its attenions.
They have John D's and Morgan
P's on many a distant ball, and
vere it not for Halley hot these few
vould grab it all.
A Guggenheim would capture
dars.a Rockefeller Venus, and Morgans
on the other stars would uttery
demean us. We'd even be, unhaplappily,
quite naked where we sit,
f it were not that Halley got around
ind saw to it.
It will not all at once appear how
ar the comet served us, or just to
vhat extent the fear prevailed while
t observed us; but safe to say that
or a dayor thereabouts somewheres,
he trusts won't find it half so hard
o tell our things from theirs.
However, and be it a? it may,
The comet wiii outpace us,
And The<>dorus on a day
Will hippily embrace us.
The hemisphere will tip, we fear,
B'-neath his mighty track,
But even to Lhe liars will
Rejuiee to see him back.
'Twere better to be in a club and
MmnAaA Ananias than laneruish sadlv
is a dub unsung or honored by ms. j
rhe chance for fame since Afric j
fame wooed this extraordinary son
>f the Dutch has not been much,and
e is welcome, very.
Old Mr Taft's a good old soul.ann
>lugs along undaunted, but Theolorus
on the whole was rather what
ve wanted. We never cease to pfate
if peace and say that war is bad,but
ven so it does get slow with no one
ery mad.
We rather liked the pleasant
ound of peace gone willy-nilly, and
omeone being chased around the
Vhite House with a billy. We've
nissed him much for lack of Dutch
n smiling Mr Taft, and mortal sin
>ut it has been a long time since we
aughed.
The Dre.sQnt Congress will conclude
Where freedom's latest squwjik was,
And turu to have its work reviewed
By ali the big Chautauquas.
The President will pitch his tent
At Beverly again,
And the news anon will dwell upon
The likelihood of rain.
Upon the 21st the sun will reach
he line of Cancer, and summer not
oo underdone will haply be the anwer.
This is, they say, the longest
lay, however you may search, but
'ou will hardly notice it unless you
tre at church.
At any rate, the swimming-hole
sill get a little warmer, and harvest
time will vex the soul and slumber of
the farmer. He'll pray for hands to
tend his lands, spread food and tie
the dog; and the wary tramp will
make his camp inside a hollow log.
The rich will hie away to spend
the summer by the water?to live
until the season's end the glad life
of an otter. The poor, meanwhile,
will sweetly smile, however fortune
goes, and splash and rub inside the
tub alternate with the clothes.
The singing stars will reindulge
their old familiar riddle, and milk
and buttermilk will bulge the boarder
round the middle. The heart for
June will hum a tune, of plenty or a
crust, and the whip-por-will when
night is still will whistle like to bust.
And then July will come ar^^S^
In terrible ascendance,/
And we will sh(M>teacli ot
Observing independence.
How do you like us? .
Marvelous Discoveries
mark the wonderful progress of the
age. Air flights on heavy machines,
telegrams without wires terrible war
inventions to kill men, and that wonder
of wonders?Dr. King's New
Discovery?to save life when threatened
by coughs, colds, la grippe,
asthma, croup, bronchitis, hemorrhages,
hay fever and whooping
cough, or lung trouble. For all bronchial
affections it has no equal. It
1 - nnanat
relieves iiisu&uuy. us uic suicot
cure. James M. Black, of Asheville,
N. C-, R. R. No. 4, writes it cured
him of an obstinate cough after all
other remedies failed. 50c. and $1.
A trial bottle free, Guaranteed by
jM. L.Allen.
KILLThe COUGH
awdCUREtmLUNCS
wmDRJUNG'S
NlWDlSCOVERY
ruk^olds v trial iromifrh
AND ALL THROAT AMD IUNC TROUBLES
GUARANTEED SATISFACTORY
OP MONEY REFUNDED. ,
SPECIAL NOTICES
Transient Notices will be Published
in This Columh at the Rate of* One
Cent a Word for Each Issue. No advertisement
taken for less than 25 cents.
For rent-One Fox Typewriter.
For terms apply to
M W McConxell,
6-2-2t Kingstree, S C
Notice?I hav*1 an up-to-date portable
Threshing Machine and will be
glad to thresh grain for the public this
season. Carltox Fitch,
4-7-3m Lake City, S C
For Salk?Fine Orpington Chickens
50c, 75o and 81.00, according to size
G-?od, Healthy. Pure-bred Fowls.
Eggs, setting of 13, $1.00.
T M Scott.
' 5-1 -tf Kingstree, S C
/
GREELYV1LL
i
I
"GOODS"
Our spring line of mercha
and look over our stock. Just a
Cluett-Peabodj
that r?rvat $0 00 npr dozen cointr J
SKREEIER S:
for men. The best shoe on
BATES' IL
We have them all prices
Ladies' White Wa
at from 8 to 25 cei
l. I).
HOYT'S GERMAN COLOG1
(
/ ,
For CoughsDo
you know a remedy for con
years old? There is one?Ayi
in the family, it stays. Jt is n
the- place of a doctor. It is
the treatment of all throat
vnnr nwn Hnrfntr hU nnir.inn
| No alcohol in this cough medic
You cannot recover promptly if your bowels ar
ative; act directly on the liver. Sold for nearly si
Igri
We Specialize the r
horseflesh. No need to go farthe
X HORSES an.
X J. L. ST I
U LAKE CI1
u) The Only Exclusively Live-Stock De
Uesesescseses
"EES t:
d, ox.j B3[
(Prickly A?h, Poke Bo
- positive cures op al
txr - nnwailiNHiMHVMi
.n*cr-ioreeP. P. P. MI tplent
- in, and ;<reecrlbe It with
t xi ?a-to.action (or the evam of tiu ^^6
t : c.% ori'i r.i t^ee of Primery, Secondary PHI
. or;i\rj Saibil^, Srphilitlo Rheu- M
i. ... .i .>vofuloua Ulctn ud Soma, 0^^
J?vdllLo^t, Rheam?tl*m, Kidj.j?
Cjrci'Ulula, old Oirooio Cloan thai
STARRH^
i ? in????
hare raalatod til trmtmaiit, Catarrh, Skla BH
DIIuim, Icaem*, CbroaJo 7?m&l?
CorspUluta, Mtrcuritl PoJtoa, Tvtter, W'
BcilJhetd, ?te., lie.
P. P. P. la * po awful tenia tad u
xrellmt appitiaar, building sp tha ^JSB
ayatom rapldl* If yon m vaak nod
fMi ntoJy toy P. P. P., and
RHEUM
I
,E LIVE STOCK C(
QREELYVILLE, S. C.
THAT AR
mdise!is now complete and we will be
few leaders: ?
.Shirts j| Men's an
at oUc each. i*
___?? s *n !
hoes ;{ i
the market I AGO
LTS. if we would li
and styles. QRC
j i J We keep on h
1SI vTOOQS 5 pure groceries and
S Delivered anywhere
its. * "Merry Widov
"ROM
ke.
/
iriTiii iiiafnn m
?Take This .
itfhs and colds nearly seventy
x's Cherry Pectoral. Once
ot a doctor, does not take
a doctor's aid. Made for J
and lung troubles. Ask *
of it Follow his advice.
ine. /. C. A yer Co., Lowell, Mass.
e constipated. Ayer's Pills are gently laxixty
years. Ask your doctor all aboutthem.
>
WELJVE|
^ IN AN
\ A8e fi
OF *
Specialties, ft
ieeds of our eustomers in w)
r when you want the best in (A
d MULES, fire
R E Y, fi
'Y S f!. ft
aler In Williamsburg County.
4 5
F]p^
ot and Potudm) I
L EOHMO AND STAGES 0* ]
yon win regain fleah and atrangth.
JWaeteofenargyandalldiaeaaeareeulUTg
from overtaxing the yatem are cored by
the nee of P. P. P.
Ladies whose syatamearepoiaooedand
S whoeablood leIn an ImpuraoondlHoodie
to menetraal Irregularities are pocoliarly
fc beaeflted by the wonderful tonic and
| SCROFULA '
blood cleanetng properties of P. P. P~
% Prickly Ash, Poke Boot and Potamtom.
J BoldbyaU Lrnggista. *
\ P. V. LIPPMAN
_ Proprietor
m
Savannah, Ca.
ATISIYI I
)., AGENTS,
' *
reran i
! glad to have our friends call
H I .aHips' Hrisp
shades and colors. ^
f you need
OD TRUNK
ke to show you some.
iCERIES.
land a full line of fresh and
will be glad to fill your orders,
j in town.
r Flour" can't be beat.
ERS