The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, March 14, 1901, Image 7
/
AROUSING ENTHUSIASM.
Little Scheme Worked Successfully at a
Political Meeting.
One of the iueu who will enter the
next Congress as a member of the
House makes this honest confcssioM
"You know that my district is too
close lor comfort One evening I liao
a big meeting in a locality where :t
was a toss-up which party would v. in j
out at the polls. 1 nau r.or men .-u.
liiv years in the district, but I ci.ul- j
longed any man within the hearing of
my voice to put his linger on a single
act of mine that so much as suggested
want of honesty or manliness.
"A weazened little old chap aros in
the nack of the room, and in a shrill
1 nasal voice read what purported to i e
t a clipping from a Western newspapei i
* the date being in the early 70" s. In Ii
3 was charged with getting all my
poultry from a neighbor's chicken
coop, with being a Sunday-school superintendent
as a blind, and with de
j .... ,, ... .lore TV!r 11 .'{" ML'
camping wi?ft-u ?<?" .
of my partner's money.
"The audience looked black and muttered
ominously. I dramatically called
for the clipping, and it was brought
to rue l>y a young man in the audiem ;
while I was denying the accusations in
burning language. and branding thou,
as iite contemptible products of a ?( -perate
opposition.
"1 read tlie article alor.d. and then
a eked for a feu hours in which to refute
it by 1 olographic evidence. Suddenly
I braced up. tried the paper between
my finger and thitmb. held i;
between mo and the light. and jubilantly
exclaimed: 'Ctntlercan. I know
something about pajK-r. as I'm inter
ested in a factory. This is made from
wood fibre, and there wore no woodtibre
mills thirty years ago.*
'"Then I scorched and roasted w:;h
mighty indignation, until I had the
crowd In a frenzy, and it rushed forth
to wreak vengeance on my traducor.
after a unauimcus vote to support me.
It ivas a small town, and they
searched house tt'ter house, but failed
to find their victim.
r?';Where was be?'* ?. I
- - ? e -W* |
"Well, CI course, uir^ j. - 1
through my house. The dear old chap j
was my favorite uncle. Groat scheme, j
? wasn't It?"?Detroit Free Press.
r
What is a .Joke ?
What is a joke? And how are you
to know one if you see it? asks Mr.
Charles Johnston in t ho Atlantic. My
justification for this wanton malice is.
that 1 think I have discovered the
charm to lay these haunting presences
to rest; that I have in some sort
discovered the true inwardness of humor.
and even been able to draw the
shadowy line dividing it from wit.
Here is a story which seems to no
to come close to the heart of the secret.
The scenf is laid in tiie wild and
wooly West. A mustang has been
4 stolen., a claim jumped, or a poker
pack found to contain more right and
left bowers than an Arctic brig, and
swift Nemesis has descended in the
form of Manila hemp. The time has
come to break the new.', to the family
of the deceased. A deputation goes
ahead, and the leader knocks at the
door of the bereaved homestead, askInjr.
"Does Widow Smith live here?"
A stout and cheerful person replies.
"I'm Mrs. Smith, but I ain't no
widow."'
The deputatior answers: "Bet you a
dollar yon are! But you've sot the
laugh on us. just the same, tor we've
lynched the wrong man."
That story is Irresistible. It is as
full of sardonic fire as anything in all
literature, but you would hardly call
it humor. It seems to me to He so directly
on the border line that we may
vse it as a landmark.
Guarding Her Teeth.
It is easy to misunderstaud and easy
to tte misunderstood; and sometimes,
happily, it is easy to give and to accept
an explanation.
"I did think I would never come to
see yon again," said a cousin of tha
prominent society woman who had
come to the country to visit her and
was about to start homeward. "It's
kind of yon to ask me. of course, but
I remember that when 1 was at your
house in the city, twe years ago, you
did not 6eem glad to see me. You
were kind and hospitable, of . course,
but I remember you did not smile once
during the entire two weeks of mv
stay."
To her astonishment her city cousin
burst into a fit of laughter.
"Maria." she said, "just before you
came I had the n>l6fortune to break
r the porcelain 'crown' from one of my
new front teeth, and as my dentist
was out of town on his vacation, I bad
to wait for his return. I didn't dare
to smile when any one was looking at
me for fear of showing the ghastly
metallic 'back' to which the proeelain
had been attached. It was a strain,
Marie, but I was equal to it, and I did
nbt want to have to explain."
And her smile,, now witnout a mechanical
flaw, reinforced the renewed
invitation.?Youth's Companion.
California is the second largest producer
of quicksilver ia the world, and
can he made easily the first whenever
the demand for the mi* eral warrants
increasing the capacity of its cinnabar
mines.
Mrs. Window's Soothing Syru^ for children
teething, soften thegums, reduces inflammation,
altars pain, cures wind colic. 25c a bottle
| meat ? employ the best skill ? use |j
( the best materials.
We stake our fame on it. We ra
jw use it to advertise the many other I
^ (I good things that we make.
fLiBBY's)
j MINCE MEAT j
f ^ A package makes two large pies.^jk
a Your grocer will furnish it if you I
3 ask him. You will find it better M
yj than home-made ? better than any 1
11 mince meat you ever tasted. You'll F
? cat Libby's foods thereafter.
3 Llbby, McNeill & Libby. Chicago |
5 Our book, "How to Make Good Things M
to Eat," sent free.
g msssa ma
ALUXUF
IP* *>">A.I s* 1/
.^r
/i^\Wr
I * ? ^ A % ' ;>
/ i J* " 3< /*
A"VI if I
Watch our ne>
I 3L.XO
M BI MAPFPP
uuri uurrcc is
an absolutely pure coffee, fi
In every package of LION COFI
fact, no woman, man, boy or girl v.
I comfort and convenience, and whic
ju the wrappers of our one pound seal
5S000G5X500SX3C
I I
5? All ages hail with <
55 of humanity and will do
55 your life out. Simply 1
j5 form, pleasant of taste <
55 of homes, and are the f;
|| Dont fc>
? THE TAB
OrAWAXTEtDTOCURf
?bnd klratli. bait blood, wind c
hradnohr. liElicitlon, ylmitlM,
e?lnUu unit diuliru. When ;
retrtnic sick. C?nitlpmt1*B kllli
it la at atarter for too chronic a
aft.-rwanda. N* aactrr what al
7?a will afYtr (tt well and lw
_ v. ri(kt. Talio oar adwlcel atart i
TS guarantee to cure or atoaej reft
'Wwwwvw'
bo. 1 I.
;^Veed^fcc Thompson's EyeWatei
?'
.#
The Ameer of Afghanistan has issued an
order that all the young men throughout
the country, who are not permanently employed
at some occupation, are to join the
army. He has also caused it to be proclaimed
that a vision he had when he
came to the throne, in which he was instructed
to build a wall round the couni
try, has been fulfilled.
t are of the Baby.
To keep the skin elean is to keep it healthy;
every mother should therefore see thai her
baby is given a daily bath in warm water with
Ivory Soap. The nursery should also be well
aired and cleaned, and all clothing washed
with Ivory Soap, well rinsed and dried in th?
?uo, Eliza It. Palklu.
Electric coal-cutting machinery is rap|
idly displacing hand-work and other varie]
ties of mechanical mining appliances in
I the collieries of .'Ireat Britain and the
I Tho OA1 1 tVlllQ mini*/) w
I UI4.ru * lie vuui hm-o Itnuvu
cleaner, the waste less and the effect of
the machine on the ventilation and temperature
of the mine is less than with any
other mechanism.
The sun. earth and stars are all made
jf the same elements.
A Itccord
Of almost a century has proven that Crab
Orchard Water is a reliable specific for Sick
Headache, Dyspepsia and Constipation, (jive
it a trial.
The man with an elastic conscience ?
II ways willing to stretch a pointumammimmmmssaaMEmmaBt
tY WITHIN THE REACH
h'}
I
tt advertisement. ^ 3
not glazed or coaled with egg n:
ill of strength and flavor.
:EE you -will find a fully illustrated and c
'ill fail to find in the list some article whic
h they may have by simply cutting out a
ed packages (which is the only form in wh
WOOLSON SPICE CO., TOLEDO, OHIO.
For the
delight the coming of the most *
away with the taking of pbnoxio
)ecause in CASCARETS Candy
[just like candy) and of never-fai
avorite medicine of the whole far
? ? ? ? 1
* rooieu wmi
DP " I take |
Jgal|| jure flod^pUw
? |
BEST FOR BC
all bowel trooWrt. ppeidlrllli, "bllloosaese,
n the stoafaeh. bloated hniirli, foal mosch,
pains after eatlar. liter trenhle., sallow oobyour
bowels 4oa'c atave rexalnrly yoa are
more people tbaa all other diseases together.
Ilaients Bid leas years ofaafrerlag that cobae
lis yoa, start tsklss I'.lbCA K KTit today, far
well alt the tlnse uaf-ll yon put year bowels
slik C.tk'AKCTt today, ntacr aa absolute
ladedL < \
IB
i fiYD /YD O V NEW DI3C0VERT;ftsa
- I r% It O I nn.ck relief and curea word
, I'tsser. Book oftstcimqnisis and 10 days tiesndenl
r ' Free. He. s. B. ORKffU S aoPK. b?x b. avuu. Is
m ?i s
,
' <.? e.. ...v '
With tae musician it is never a case of all
J work and no play.
Two hundred bushels of potatoes
remove eighty ,pounds
of "actual" Potash from the
L K-_
soil. Unless this quantity
i?:'% is returned to the soil,
uv.y;- _ '
i^y^ the following crop will
SgSpSi. materially decrease.'
^TTw.- have books telling about I
S~55?^) composition, use arid value of j
SllttWS fertilizers for various crops. I
They arc sent free.
I OF ALL!
_
I
All Alike!
ION COFFEE i
is always the same.
One package is just like another. I
It is uniform in every respect.
' NEVER VARIES.^
,-ou like one package you will like all
^EE.
lixtures and chemicals, but is
lescriptive list. No housekeeper, in
:h will contribute to their happiness,
certain number of Lion Heads from g
.ich this excellent coffee is sold).
onderful meritorious preparation
us, violent purges, inconvenient li
p Cathartic you will fin^ust..tyhat.
ling remedial action. They .have ?<
nily, from baby to good.old grandp
istitutes for CASC
Cincihw.ti Enquirer. ( v
Mcnanre In praltlnc your Vain- shrtf
Ij CASCAItSTS. 1 and my wbole mj-*
red relief from ibe flrrt nr. all box
certainly recommend CAiCAKETS tinu?
en they mate and truit thejr will
in ererr home. Yonraforauccew." Pno
Peteji Weed. Jr.. hi C
Palm Grove Ave., AlcEcesport. Pa
CJlCt>
nflle^ou Eraotlona. moT
Vn{ run for the phy^
>WELS AND LIVER.
' ovAKArrm to ctkii rt? n
f A KFTCWMiold. Xow ItlioTcrilx miUI.
rimllar BcOeU. la the world. Tkli I. abi
' ?ttr htit kitlaotUl. W? have f.ttki aad v
ciur.ate?d to car* or money refunded. Go
tbtiW. f.lr, komt trl.l, aoper ilaplt dlrtel
. after a.lag ?"? 4?Oo box, rrt.ri the niiKi
'u? b.v mull, or Ik* Uranlit from whom jotr
back for both,boxr., T.ktpnr >dTlc??no m
Health w|1l g.lnlr follow and you will ble.i
of CAKCiRETb Hook frte by mail, Aidi I
f | UUb;?s'Sf (M#|l CO of oreiry'SilSrTtptloi Sot- I
I i 'iMT*\ O.UaLCu. lgfictlon Guaranteed.
H 3KfA; wnt^for ?>riceV. JESSE WARDEN M
( iu? a. CU.vl.'c &., L'AU in :?L. ila.
Vdi'di' U*- r'l
iMM-i Vy . l'V
' 4a, /
' -r<?
; .
f DYSPEPSIA I
o yields to nature's medicine, v
d It ea?i!y rnree Dyepepela and all itomach,
V liver, kidney and bo wo I disorders. An un- i'
Q rivalled aperiont and laxative; Invigorates I, I
Q and tone* tho whole xjntem. A natural I, I
Q water of the hljrheet medicinal value, oon- i"(
(\ centrated to make it easier ? I11
a and cheaper to bottle, r-yr, lillPTik i'i
W ehip and uao. A -<>*. i 'yvifX ,i
0 bottle in equal to 2 gallons ^uyBr V
Q of uncondeneed water. I,1
O Sold by irujtjjteta cT,"T-7nir*r K^SaurH I.I
0 where. Crab aaide trade- IKgl 1Q2Q22* |'|
X mark on every bottle. ,1,
X CBAd ORCHARD WATER CO., LouilvitU._Kj. ,' j
S"SALZER's" SEEDS [
n, /./xO WILL MAKE YOU RICH" *
Wlftf/L* This It a daring etatement,b*? Sal
UWSW?^ reria teede bear It out every Una 1
Combination Corn.
G reatri teoru on eiLrth. Will poetttvwty
Yrev jlutlonlie corn growing. I
y?4 ^Billion DollarOrab#. ft-?*
Fadv-^F* ' Greatest marvel of the aga, Jattf'W1
L'ySi tru VX lj toot of hay per acre. Flrui IXti ;L
'.'rr^ croptlx weeks after aowiDC
WhaT? \il
? Catalogue telle.
SftM' ran ijc. stamps
and this XOTICR wt mail LsHgtgttytM
J'g'Ji-w* ^ wed catalog. Id Craio IA |?8j;
IllviilV SemplaahvcladiBf abovealso I A ^MwT}:
6p#lu (M 6a. par A.) Oate, IWMiFlrJl
A (iiO txthrl par A.) Raps, Vf
J Uar1.y,(17J uu.ptrA) l'taoat, etc. \VorU|ia M paeJteri. T ,
F John A. Salzer Seed Co. t* Cm*, n*. II
fw
Ir'escue f*\
From SICKNESS ?
and SUFFERING. mkjfj
WELTMERISM, ?'
the druglo? science
of healing originated,
practiced and taught '
by Ptof. S. A. WELTMEP, baa rescued
more hopeless cases than any other known
method. AH who desire Health and Hap*
plness or a Paying Profession should write
at once for special offer and a free copy of
"Weltmcrlsm". fully Illustrated. Address
PROF 9. A. WELT SI ER. O
I 200 s. asm st. Nevada.dor
^agBHuaaMOnoannMnniaw
Paid fordittrlbutln-actTert'^lna matter relatlre to
AI.I.IG t'l'OK LIMMBMT. Us? best rub on earth
for RhoumatUm. Neuralgia and all "aitu. Encloto
stamp forreely. Sample mailed for lie. Address
THE AI.L1GATOH LINIMEJITC%
< Wi t RI.KSTOV. S. O.
*T\I! pCPOsrnvtLTiiKcuw
g I I iLEaW \O MORE SUFFERING 3
JP &L<? No More Dnnzrroua Operations. 5
KVK.V PHYSICIAN# ASTONBHEO. J
IP We guarantee to Cure you of this Dread iff
? FUr*-e: Do not delay: Order It tonlay ff
v, J*m You rntv nctsee this adv. again, eft* m
Prepaid la Plala Wrapper for ^w*?yg
5 Dt p'lt , BRAND-DECKER CHEMICAL CO.. 3
SI MILW'AI'KKK. WIS. 4
ss^sinpaansssianaapaapaaam
ana a im L A D V SOLICITOUS of
nv? 5l nS.S (F 11 ttood address andchaiacWB
Kla 6 bll ter to introduce and sell
"DPINFKt TINE" SOAP) the healingwoniTer
of modern times. Guaranteed for the
P'evention of contagion and cure of any skia
dise'is -. Popular price. Repeats everywhere,
t-xclusive territory. Steady, god-raving
employment DISINUKCTINE CO.,
Canton, Ohio.
***< *+*%?********* mT"
f I
that w?I lighten the ills 52
quids, and pills that tear 5J
you want, .convenient in 5?
:>und a place in millions 52
ARETS2 ||
T 0
50c, ^
NEVER SOLD IN BULK. Q
, DRUGGISTS g
ttn *r* the Int hex *f CAB*
a bcxti a year, greater than ear Sjr
lelate proof ef great merit, ail rfSpl
rill sell CAIfAKCTI abeelotely C 3
buy ted ay, twe Me baxee, giro M|
loot, ai4lfj*a are net taKtled A*
I Me hex a>4 the eapty boa ta BJT,
parehaied It, aad get year meaey gV
attaewhat all* yea?ttart leday. C 3
> threar rea flret started the mo V
iTKIUdXQ gjtgXPT Ob., Mew left ee Chi mi. XX
^WWVVWWV
iiseGE8TAI?IsCURE,H
,; * 7
' ; 4 . *t
^