The Orangeburg democrat. (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1879-1881, September 12, 1879, Image 2
SlUOMDAN (fe SIMS} i'r?pHetor?.
SUUSGKIt'TION.
One Year.:u:...,:;.i:u::..8?0
Six Months.:.:;..i.1.00
ttflulstera of the Qospcl.1.00
AOVKUtl?KMKNTS.
'First Instortion.$1.00
fEaeh Subsequent Insertion.60
Liberal coutruuls Jiiade for mouth
. anil over.
job office
4sjPntoVAHtob lo.fco a-ll kinds oi
Job 2^ivittting
The Editors' Convention. I
JEditor Oranyebimj Democrat:
[Respectfully dedicated to whose
soul is in sympathy with the' ihnltyra
who have to plod through wearying
.(columns of we(n)ekly cohtributions,
? consisting principally of "stale picnic
literature;"]
In the latter part of the Iwbhtibth
eentnrV\ there once Jived a great and
\envneu cosmologist, wlio was indeed
the marvel bT his age. Ills generous
heart was-.often wrung "with woe
while pondering on the ignorance of
his fellow-creatures. lie thought their
narrow world too small by far, and
longed to burst upon their darkened
mental vision like some brilliant
comet, which traversing the universe,
startles worlds with its lurid blaze;
and by the intellectual light emana
ting from ins own tniud, by the radi
ant scintillations of his glowing gen
ius, forever dispel the gloom that
hovered thcrp, and illume their minds
with the broad light of reason.
How best to accomplish this, he
pondered long while sitting in his
laboratory, for, in the pursuit of
^knowledge, he had not adhered to a
^Xnlitary beaten track, and was not
ofdy deep in the lore of past ages, but
k\ow the secrets of physical laws and
phenomena, besides being conversant
with all polite literature. Twilight
shades were falling fast as he still
sat buried in thought. "O, pitiful,
benighted creatures 1" he lamented,
"how can I rend the heavy veil be
tween us? Shall I appeal to you?
shall I wear out' my life endeavoring
to walk in your paths, trying to reach
you by the orator's eloquence? Im
possible ; all could or would not hear,
vain, vain 1 sigh for the victor's
meed. My soul recoils, suffers, dc
sp?tre at thought of your blindness?
yet what can I do?"
He bowed his noble form in speech
less sorrow, keenly feeling the con
sciousness of powers to do, and noth
ing tobe done, yearning to overleap
the blank wall that stared him in the
face. Suddenly there came, quick as
the lightning Hash over the electric
wire,' tho rhpid transit oi sound along
the telephone, or the swift incision by
the phonographic hand, an idea which
caused him to .?piing up with face
aglow.
"I wiJi write 1" he exclaimed, "I
will educate?I will reach the masses
.?I will edit a newspaper which shall
be in reach of all."
The longer he pondered, the more
desirable and feasible seemed the
scheme, yet it perplexed him to think
how could he perform the work of a
journalist and continue the pleasing
labors he was unwilling to sacrifice.
"In order to instruct others, I must
study myself, and while I expect to
contribute a great deal to this benefi
cent undertaking, those who will be
the recipients of ray favors, must be
co-workers in the field-"
Accordingly, the pre'iminarics hav
ing /been thoughtfully arranged, as
Um J?oat effectual way of bringing
? ? Jf an important subject under the
o^g|Aidernlioii of the public, be called
^^r^nvcnlion. At that advanced pe
riod of the world's history, the cause
of education and enlightenment did
not languish as it had done in times
more remote, and now proved suffi
cient to attract a large number pos
sessed of but ordinary intellect as well
as the literati of the land, who crowd
ed the large temple of learning in
their attendance upon the Editor's
Convention, as it was termed in the
"Hourly News," published by Messrs.
II. E. Arsny & Co., in the city where
he resided.
With anxious hearts, the assembled
multitude rested their eager gaze
upon the high stage where towered*
the majestic brow of the learned auto
crat, who now arose and in a deep-!
toned voice, unfolded in an eloquent
oration, his grand scheme, and solic
ited, nay demanded their co-opera
tion. He announced that "The Great
Constellation" would soon illumine
the literary world with its effulgence,
and that they now enjoyed the un
precedented privilege of offering con
tributions to this mighty work, and
requested each to state in turn the na
ture of his offering.
A solemn hush prevailed over the
vast concourse. Each felt the impor
tance of the hour. To each trembling
heart, the spini of Fame seemed lin
gering at the vestibule of the glorious
future, and Ambition sighed for a
single breath of the ethereal atmos
phere she breathed. Each looked
timorously around as a pale young
man arose. Ills dark eyes binned
with hidden flic, :ts In low's eloquent
tones he urged the hl Aims of the Muse
of Poetry; He spoke ot tile halo
which she east around the immortal
geniuses that make the pa&t illustri
ous, and the radiant glory She would
throw title wh tho vistit or Coining
years) and compared her place in the
"Great Constellation" to the steady
glow of the fixed star which ever
shines with a pure and unwavering
light, which needs not the reflected
glow of distant suns to enhanco its
beauty and brilliancy.
His period was cut short bv ono of
stern, dark mien, whose severe
glance emitted u baleful spark as he
ridiculed the youthful speaker.
"Poetry, forsooth ! what need has
the public lor that? How does it ed
ucate? Improve? What truths of
nature does it reveal? It clearly
enunciates the wonders of science, I
suppose? Our poet would imitate
the ancient philosophers Who contrib
uted their quota in erecting a wall of
ignorance and superstition, by build
ing up a crystalline structure which
dazzled and misled the diligent
searcher niter truth. Knell self-taught
sage thought ho could discern the er
rors of his predecessors, and establish
his own speculations; consequently,
timc-honotcd theories arose, which
mystified by the obscurity of their
Oligin, the incertitude of their found
ation, and the intricacy which invest
ed them wi'h an appearance of astute
ness. The enthusiastic founder then
fastidiously delineated his system in
the classic cities of antiquity to
throngs of eager students by whom
Ins wandering vagaries were industri
ously propagated. Thus the, idosyn
crasies of individuals became merged
in a sect distinct from all others and
strict in its tenets. The Stoic, the epi
curean, the Plutonic, the Pythagorean
sects of philosophers?what were they
hut the reflection and illustration of
the characters of their several found
ers? It required years of profound
study by wise men to refute their er
roneous doctrines. But through^the
untiring exertions of genius', they
were finally corrected and assigned
to the shades of obscurity whence
they only emerge as examples to en
force the truth contained in the coup
let,
'Errors like straws on the surface flow,
lie who would search tor pearls must
dive helow.'
In modern times, along witli the
tidal waves of knowledge, far-fetched
errors arc borne on the current of
I popular belief, and attain such a
wide-spreud circulation as to meet
witli universal reception. The aver
age mind is so devoid of penetration
as to catch the floating opinion of tho
world, and receding from any intense,
individual exertion, merely receives
the opinions of others, and by
reconciling them to its peculiarities
of constitution, imagines them to be
its own original conceptions. To up
root these false opinions, ascertain
the true, and implant them in the
clouded brain, is tho task which I
purpose entering upon through the
columns of your paper. Science be
ing thus divested of the dark veil
which obscures her brightness, her
endless array of wonders viewed
through the necromantic glass held
up in the vacillating rays of this
twentieth century, will dazzle the en
lightened world with their gorgeous
panorama."
Overawed by this glimpse ?as
through a glass darkly, into unknown
realms of thought, another portentous
silence reigned over the audience.
With a sneer on his handsome face
and an ironical smile curving his cyn
ical lips, another speaker arose, and
with mock gravity, and an admirable
imitation of the former's bombastic
tone, addressed the philanthropist on
the rostrum :
"Pompous phraseology and a well
dissimulated assumption of genius,
mingled with presumlive transcend
entalisms, very frequently are misin
terpreted. Political fantasies and a
psucdo philosophy the characteristics
of which are eminently rccrcmcntions, |
often infringe upon the stern realities
of life, surreptitiously thrusting them
aside, and substituting in their stead
Utopian fallacies and transmutable
speculations which at a cursory view,
seem to be irrcprehcnsihlc, being
founded on apparently creditablo hy
potheses. A senseless logomachy is
then made subservient for reconciling
these contradictory ideas and render
ing the phantasmagoria imperuienblc
as a consequence, false ideas of life,
und arLIQuinl conceptions of duty mil
lead the uninitiated. f?oinetitJii's? how
ever, autl I devoutly hope such will
ho Ihb case ih the prescht instance,
this periphrasis defeats its own ob
ject nnd the sciolism is repudiated
by those wise enough to understand
the nomenclature of these superficial
productions, which never attain with
them even a meritorious mediocrity,
hut aro as the sparkling of a shallow
stream reflecting superior effulgence."
His vein of sarcasm was arrested
by a manifestation of restlessness, jn
the audience, so that ho made way
for a timid individual, evidently much
embarrassed, and in dread of criti
cism, who, in a few brief sentences, j
presented chauns of fancy to II12
reader, and alluded to the soothing
1 effects of light literature upon the
'mind when wearied with severer la
bors, concluding his remarks by mod
estly reading the opening chapter of
a romance he proposed contributing.
A large imposing man with a busi
ness-like air next arose ; with a wave
of his hand which embraced the mod
ern philosopher, his critic, ami the
[ would-be novelist, he began in sharp,
[ incisive tot.es :
I "I could scarce restrain my impa
tience while they were speaking.
How insipid the stalo topics agitated
thousands of years ago ! We crave
something exciting, bearing on mod
em events, neither philosophy, nor
yet a love-lorn ditty. Behold in me
the chairman of a committee on pres
idential affairs. We want to know
something about the times and the
living men who are ruling our desti
nies. Who and what they are, is a
question of more importance. Shall
our government be in the hands of
thieves and robbers? Shall we send
men of sense to Congress, or misera
ble pettifoggers? Can we tamely sub
mit to piundef ? ??" '
"Oh, leave it to the politician on
the stage to thunder!" interrupted a
bright-eyed, joyous looking young
man. "Let those who arc obliged to
do so, think and talk about such
things. A;truce to jour-ofllobils'niid
politicnns. This paper is for our ben
efit, nnd we do not want a national
mill to grind out bills and vetoes, ap
propriations and elections. Give us
something entertaining to refresh us
when \vc have leisure to read. I offer
myself as a reportor of all the festi
vals, grand occasions, balls, local" ob
jects of interest, incidents that trans
pire in our midst, including personal
items. Let us know what is going on
in the social world."
"His remarks sufficiently reveal the
calibre of his mind," said a brisk
looking individual, with a wide-awake
air, and a conscious smile on his fea
tures, who now stepped forward with
agility. "Pleasure and festivals?he
would like to attend them every day
and write them up afterwards for
those who did not. participate. He
would please a portion of the readers
at the expense of the others, and fail
to meet the public taste. Mr. Editor,
we want the news in general, we wish
to know what the world is doing, how
we are progressing. History furnish
es us with an account of past ages,
oral communications will make us
sufficiently familiar with topics of
local interest merely, and upon these
subjects it is useless to waste printers
ink. Sir, in the Interest of M'J he
Great Constellation," I will penetrate
the ice-bound regions of the North, ex
plore the tropical world, compass land
and sea to secure the latest informa
tion for its benefit . The names of the
most illustrious actors on the world's
great stage shall grace its columns?
Cavagnari, Biddulph, Larrosdon,Bing
hamton, Bostclick, Burkellon?yon
shall see them make their bow and
say farewell. The latest telegraphic
dispatches from Australia and Cen
tral Africa shall promptly appeal', to
gether with minute dcta?s in regard
to the revolution in Siberia. No part
of the globe shall escape my observa
tion of its people, their manners and
customs, political and social gossip,
while the most experienced aeronauts
shall keep me posted on their atmos
pheric explorations. In fact, Mr.
Editor, I will endeavor to secure a
world-wide popularity for this new
periodical, by becoming its world
wide reporter."
His auditors woro a somewhat puz
zled expression, but nevertheless,
seemed to appreciai,o the importance
of the self-styled "world-wide repor
ter," who seemingly entertained such
a comfortable opinion of his own ca
pabilities.
Though the editor awaited further |
oilers, no candidate for literary hon
ors presented himself. Scoing that
the discussion was ended", the fotmer
arose, and closed the convention witli
the following remarks:
4li have, been very much gratified
to sec such n ready response to the
call I have made upon this conven
tion, but nt the same lime I am ex
tremely bewildered. My intentions
wore to furnish tho means of instruc
ting and pleasing everybody, but to
day I have learned that that is im
possible. The poet, the philosopher,
the cynic*, the n?vclist, politician,
pleastire-aeolter, the cosmopolite?
how can their opposing tastes be rec
onciled? How can 'satisfaction lie
guaranteed to all these different
minds in the compass of a single
newspaper? I despair of a compro
mise, nnd will consider the subject
carefully for some time longer ore I
take any further decisive steps toward
the publication of "The Constella
tion."
And the bewildered philanthropist
while endeavoring to enlighten others,
received a lesson himself, and discov
ered for the first lime that unless you
consent to do it in their own elected
way, some people, absolutely' refuse
to be enlightened. Mionon Etta,
Not Generally Known.
It has long been the boast of Bri
tons that the sun never sets oh the
British empire, It may be news to
many of our readers that the same
boast applies with equal force to the
United States. When the sun is giv
iug its good night kiss to our wester
most isle, on the confines of Bob
ring's Sea, it is already flooding the
fields and forest of Maine witli its
morning light, and in the eastern
part of that Stale is more than an
j hour high. At the, very moment
when the Aleutian fisherman, warned
by the approaching shades of night,
is pulling Iiis canoe toward the shore,
the wood chopper of Maine is begin
ning to make the forest echo with
the m?sic of his axe. From the farr
thest eastern point of on? countr}', at
Eastport, Me., to the farthest of the
Aleutian Islands?acquired by our
purchase of Alaska?the (distance is
one hundred and ninety-seven de
grees of longitude, or seven degrees
of longitude, or seventeen degrees
more than half way around the
globe.
Freedman's Saving Bank.
The experts "employed in examin
ing the books and accounts of the
Freedman's Bank are massing some
evidence of the irregular manner in
which the business was transacted
and the deposits accounted for.
They have discovered leaves cut from
the original ledgers, leaves without
numbers pasted together and bal
ances not brought forward. Omis
sions occur to every book found. In
deposit ledger "A" balanced foot up,
with amount duo depositors, aggre
gating 810,000. Whether these have
been transferred or finally settled it
is impossible to tell, there being no
indexes to the ledger, these being
toin out and destroyed. Unfortunate
ly the statute of limitation will pre
vent a prosecution of the persons re
sponsible tor tins mismanagement of
the affairs of the bank, but tho depos
itors urge that it will be some satis
faction to know who the rascals are.
How, Now ?
The mild form of bulldozing which
prevails in the New England States
is as dangerous to the freedom of the
ballot and to Republican institutions
as the more violent form which is
charged upon the South. The Wal
lace Congressional Committee, at
present engaged in taking testimony
in Massachusetts, has had many wit
nesses before them who testified that
they were discharged because they
refused to vote in accordance with
the wishes of their employers. It ie
I apparent to every thinking man that
unless men are allowed to vote as
they wish the day is not far distant
when a Republican government in this
country will be declared a failure.
Tub exodus in Texas is assuming
a queer phase. Near -Galveslon the
negroes, having become dissatisfied
witli their condition, had determined
to emigrate. The white people ap
proved the decision of the colored
brethren, and formed a committee on
emigration to raise money to send
the negroes North, and soon steps
will be taken to bring in while men
to replace the blacks,
Sudden Death.
Miss Marie E. Whaloy, the eldest
daughter of Mnj) T. B. Whaloy, a
prominent lawyer of Orangeburg,
(lied Very suddenly last Wednesday
afternoon, at the residence of Mrs.
L. Alison's. Miss Whalcy came to
Aiken early in the summer for the
benefit of her health, and her friends
supposed she was Improving, but in
this they were mistaken. While
walking out in the garden she was
taken with a violent hemmorrhags
nnd in.less than fifteen minutes the
spirit of this lovely young lady hud
taken its.flight to the land beyond
the skies.
.lust in the full Hush of happy wo
manhood, her death is clothed with
something more than common sorrow.
Words cannot express the loan sus
tained by her ?grief-stricken father
and brot hers, whose chief consolation
will be a hallowed remembrance of
her pure womanly character while on
earth and a happy rc-union beyond
the grave.
"The good die firsL I ul they whose
hearts are dry as Buniminer's dust,
burn to the socket.''?Aiken Journal'
Review.
For the Girls.
This item, which we take from an
exchange, is for the girls: "The
blooming and beautiful young lady,
rose-ehceked and bright-eyed, who
can darn a stocking, mend her own
dresses, command a regiment of pots
and kettles,, feed the pigs, milk the
cows, and be a lady all at the same
lime, is the girl that sensible 301mg
men aic in quest of for a wife. But
you pining, wnsp-waisled, doll-dress
ed, consumption-mortgaged, music
murdering, novel-devouring daught
er of fashion uud idleness, you arc
no more fit for matrimony than a pul
let to look after a brood of fourteen
chickens. The truth is, my dear
girls, you want less of restraint and
?more liberty of action ; more kitchen
and less parlor; more exercise and
less sofa ; more pudding aud less
piano; more frankness and lesa mock
modesty. Loose your corsets und
breathe the puro atmosphere* and be
come something jis good and beauti
ful as nature designed."
A Fatal Frolic.
Three young fad ics who were pas
sengers on the steamer Danube dur
ing a recent trip to Shrcvepoit, La.,
landed at Minden while the boat was
wooding. In a spirit of gayety they
got into an ox cart lor a ride. The
oxen ran off, upsetting the wagon.
Misses Carrie Brewer and Maltie
Joyce were maimed for life. Miss
Van Bokern, the other lady, was the
only one w ho escuped apparently un
injured, but the bIiocIc lo her nerves
was so great that she was taken ill,
nnd her illness terminated in death.
She was an orphan, her mother dy
ing but recently. Leaving home,
and in a few weeks dying among
comparative strangers willi not one
of her few relatives near to receive
the last farewell on earth, is peculiar
ly sad, even heart-rciiding.
Indians.
An illustration of the facility with
which the Indians arc defrauded ami
the Government is made responsible
for their loses, is found in the case of
some of the l'otlnwalamics, lately in
Washington. Under the pretence
that certain members of the tribe,
who were fugitives in Mexico, were
dead, speculators represented them
selves ns their administrators, and
secured their lands and shares of
trust funds, amounting to 815,000 al
together. A small moiety of this
was recovered, but the Government
must make good the remainder, the
veritable and living Indians having
returned to claim it. Another spec
ulator takes several of the claimants
in charge, and, appearing in Wash
ington, makes application for their
dividends.
Divine service in the English par
ish church of Cljaltcris was strangely
interrupted a fortnight ago. A boy
who was snaring birds in a garden
near by saw a cat,run up a tree with
a young rabbit in his mouth. Hav
ing a loaded gnu, the lad on the im
pulse of the moment fired at the cat,
in a straight direction for the chancel
of the .church. He missed his aim,
but not the church window, for up
ward of twenty shot penetrated as
many panes of glass and alarmed
tho worshippers. Fortunatelyj 1101
one was sitting in the chancel. The
vicar stopped the service, sent foi l
the police, and scolded the offender. J
EDUCATIONAL COLUMN.
All e?iiiniiinltfatfoifa Uttcrrfwl for iii\h column
plionlil lio iMlilrcsinftl to .J. ti. (rs. Ilollowoy,
Ksq.( who litis kh illy coiieenUra to i-ilit it.
Mn. Kimtor.?I ace the following
item in u lato issue: "That knife is
worth a dollar. How is 'worth' parsed
in the above sentence?"
Theoyly diillculty, I am persuaded,
consists in the very defective and er
roneous systems of grammar now in
common use. Our schools sutler no
Imposition so egregious its in the
cumbrous grammatical text-books in
common use. They are full of con
tradictions, and worse than useless di
visions and subdivisions, innpluess of
definitions ami want of precision, lliul
can serve no earthly purpose except,
to destroy the very science of English
grammar, and to overtask the.verbal
memory and obscure the mental per
ception of the pupil. Once disen
cumber our grammars of all this use
less and contradictory jargon, (intro
duced into them by the early writers
to assimilate the Latin, when they,
have no manner of practical adapta
tion to our language,) and arrange a
system on the true scientific princi-.
pies of the English language, and the
study becomes plain and simple.
There will be no diillculty then in
parsing any correctly written sen
tence.
"The British grammars of the En
glish languange, appear to me to be
very imperfect, and in some particu
lars, very erroneous."?N> Webster's
grammar, page 4. If they are imper*
I feet why not supply their dcficicnccs ?
If they arc erroneous, why not correct
I and explode their error? Who was
more competent to do this than Web"
stcr ? It must be a sin to teach what we
j know to be error and it is high liuie
I that the truth should he made known.
"So defective and erroneous arc the
British grammars, and the compila
tions in the United Slalesj formed
on their principles, that, without fur
ther helps the. construction of many
established and legitimate phrases
and sentences in our language cannot
be explained.''-^Webster's Grammar,
page 4. Then why not have the helps?
And not "helps" in the form of more
additions, rules and notes to the old
systems which would only rendcr con
fusion worse confounded ; but "helps"
by utterly discarding everything from
our grammatical*' text-books which
tends to only perplex and confuse and
is of no earthly use in aiding the pu
pil to speak and write the English
language correctly, and compiling a
grammar in accordance with the true
scientific principles of the language.
Employ apt, simple and suggestive
terms as tho names of iiic parts of
speech, and then parse every word ac
cording to its use No matter what
the word may be, if its use in the sen
tence is that- of a verb, parse it so?
if used as on adjective, parse it as an
adjective?if used as a preposition,
parse it accordingly, anil so on
through the whole of the parts of
speech. When we have removed the
accumulated mass of complicated ab
surdities from our system of gram
mar as now in use, the difllcullics of
the study will vanioh as thin air.
In Kirkhani's Grammar, page 1G2,
may be scon the following sentences,
elassetl as idioms, anomalies and in
tricacies: 1 "The wall is three feet
big l." 2 "His son is eight years old."
j 3 "My knife is worth a shilling." 4
t "She is xoorlh him nntl all his conm c
\ lions." 5 "He has been there three
j tinus." G "The hat cost tcu dollars."
i 7 "The load weighs a ton." 8 "The
I spar measures ninety Jeit.u
Now, I understand Kirkham to say
that while these sentences are correct
English, yet our grammars do not
furnish any rules oi instruction how
they may be parsed. These are but
specimens of hundreds of similar ex
pressions in daily use, ami something
must be radically wrong if our gram
mars furnish no rules by which they
may be intelligently parsed. Why
can't these sentences be parsed? We
are told, "dollars" in the Gib ; "ton"
in the 7th ; and "feet" in the 8lh,
have no governing world, because
"cost," "weighs," "measure," being
a.etjve-intrnnsitivc verbs neither have
nor can have ol jects after them. But
I must contend that tluse verbs do
have object? after them, especially,
when I see then) frequently, as in the
examples under consideration, gov
erning objects. I must believe my
own senses, any number of gramma?
liana to the contrary notwithstand
ing. Is it not better to teach the pu
pil the truth rather than an error,
merely because the error keeps in
vogue ::n old rule taken from a lan
gunge governed by different scientific
principles, and which Contradicts the
very senses of the student?
"He has been there thtcc limee,*
Whet is difficult about this? "Times
is a noun without any governing
word." But I heg ponton-"*"times*'
is not a noun in this sentence* He
has been there oficn, fecqneidly, first j
last, seldom, qualify "lias been;"
".three times0 is used in like manner,
and words used alike should bo
parsctl alike.
In the 3rd example "worth" is a
preposition (relative would be a much ,
more suggestive and pioper term)
and governs .shilling ; so in like man
ner in the 4th, "worth" governs
"him" and "connce'.ions," and in the
sentence in your last issue "worth"
govern1? dollar.
In the 1st and 2nd examples from
Mr. Kirkham, "The wall is three fat
high" and "His son is eiyht years
old," "high" is an apjeetive (descrip*
tive is a much heller.term) and de
scribes the wall and '.'three feet" help
"high" describe the wall, and there- ..
lore are helping or auxiliary descrip-dj
lives. And in the second, "old" is ajj
descriptive and "eight years" helping"
descriplives. Is not this easy enough
for any. child of ordinary capacity?
"The difficulties that belong to the
subject (grammar) have been increas
ed by the. use of terms merely tech
nical in designating tho parts of
speech.'??Webster's Grammar, page
3. "Attribute is a word better Under
Istood than adjective; though it were
to be wished we could lind a more
! familiar term for that class of words."
?Ibid. What could be better "than
"Descriptive" when we consider !lho
use of that class of words in our lan
guage?
I am indebted fo* what I may
know of English Grammar and- for1
I the ideas and views above expressed!
to a grammar written by Prof. 'I. ?5?
Mot'ris, and which deserved to take? .
the place of all other English Guaair.
-mars; - K&tl6&?[
. ? ?? fd i fi ?? '? ?
A New One.
"Pshaw," said Czardinc, ' as he
seated himself in the Dtmocrat sane*
turn, "llic snake stories that are go-,
ing about arc all too thin. Why jiist'
look here. Last spring I went out into
the woods. I took along an umbrel
lcr, which I laid dawn onto some
rocks. Well, sir, about an hour af
terwards I went to get my umbreller
as it had begun to rain a little. I
took hold of the handle, and as I
gave it a shove Something begun to
tear, and as the umbreller flew open
a live black snake fell to the ground
split in two from its head to its taiL
The confounded critter had actually
swallowed vay umbreller, and I never
noticed it until I shoved up the dumb
thing and split the cuss open from
stem to stern.
Adultery.
We saw last week in the courlhouso
a white woman with her three mulat
to children. She was arrested for
adultery with a negro, under the re
cent law. We mention tho fact to
a^k if adultery is any worse between
a negro man nnd a while woman than
between a white man and a negro wo
man f Is the law any respecter of
persons and colors? Is the law to he
impartially administered and all mis
creants punished? If so, it is welL
If not we cannot nee the virtue of
hunting up a few isolated cases of in
dividual crime, isolated in being
brought under the law, but not at all
so in its criminal existence. Take
them all up or let that poor creature
out of Ihe jail and repeal the law.?
Kiiigstrce Star.
A darkey was once attempting to
steal a goose, hut a dog raised an ob
jection, and Sambo retired. The
next night during a thunder shower
he attempted it agaic, and just as ho
was on the point of getting awoy
with his fowl, the lightning sis nek
close by and the noise nearly fright
ened the .poor fellow to death. Prop
ping the goose, he started away mut
tering, "Peera to me dar's a heep.o/
fuss made bout a .common goose."
TffRX will havo to search &rani
when he arrives at San Francisco to
see if he Ims any cholera germs se
creted aliout Ins peison. That terri
ble scourge is raging, in Japan. Let
Ulysses be well quarantced and disin
fected.