The sun. [volume] (Newberry, S.C.) 1937-1972, January 25, 1952, Image 7
THE NEWBERRY SUN, NEWBERRY. S. C
JESTIN' #
MOTION CARRIED
In a town on the Pacific coast an
earthquake shock was felt. When
the municipal building rocked dan*
gerously, the aldermen broke up
their meeting in a hurry and scram*
med.
The clerk, a fuddy-duddy who in
sisted upon formalities and parlia
mentary procedure, was hard put
to give his minutes the proper of
ficial tone. Finally he elvolved this
masterpiece:
“On motion of the city hall, the
couucil adjourned."
Found A Home
A salesman was dismissed be
cause of a lack of courtesy to cus
tomers. A month later the sales
manager spotted him walking about
in a police uniform.
“I see you’ve joined the force,
Jones," said the,sales manager.
“Yes," replied Jones. “This Is
the job I’ve been looking for all my
life. On this job the customer is
always wrong."
Artist’s Pride
Steeplejack — ’Ullo, Bert!
Where’s that mate you took on—the
chap that used to be an artist?"
Second Ditto — “ ‘Aven’t you
’eard? Soon as he laid a couple of
bricks, he stepped back off the
scaffolding to admire 'is work."
DOUBLE DUTY
The chief constable of a small
English town was also an expert
veterinary surgeon. One night his
telephone bell rang.
“Is Mr. Blank there?" said an
agitated voice.
Mrs. Blank answered yes, and
inquired; * *
“Do you want my husband in his
capacity of veterinary surgeon or as
chief constable?"
“Both, madam," came the reply.
“We can’t get our new bulldog to
open his mouth, and—there’s a bur
glar in it."
Diminishing Retnrns
“Thanks very much," said the
minister, as little Tommy handed
up his offering for the harvest festi
val; “I must call round this after
noon and thank your mother for
these eight beautiful apples."
“P-please, sir," stammered Tom
my, “would you m-mind thanking
her for t-twelve apples?"
Turn Abont
“Didn’t you promise me to be a
good boy?"
“Yes, father."
"And didn’t I promise you a
thrashing if you weren’t?”
“Yes, father, but as I’ve broken
my promise, you needn’t keep
yours."
BIG ENOUGH
Two Scotchmen were out hunting
deer. One of them was new at the
game, and as they had gotten into
rather a tight place, the tension
was high.. All of a sudden, a fine big
moose stepped into the clearing.
Sandy was terribly startled as he
had never seen such a fine, big
animal before, and he cried, “Oh,
Jock, look, what’d you call that?"
Jock replied, "Why, mon, that’s
a moose.”
“Well," said Sandy with a sickly
laugh. "If that’s a moose I don’t
keer to see a rat.”
HONEST LAD
Danny, along with many other
little lads, went to school for the
first time, and like many other
little boys’ fathers, Danny’s
father asked him how he liked
his teacher.
“AD right," was the reply.
“Is your teacher smart?" teas-
Ingly persisted the questioner.
“Well, she knows more than )
do," admitted Danny.'
VIRGIL
By Len Kleis
SUNNYSIDE
by Clark S. Haas
RIMIN’ TIME
thrifty young fellow
^ NAMED TUNNEV
Saw A SALE THAT WAS
REALLY A HONEY;
The suit that he bought
VMS A BARGAIN, HE THOUGHT-
By POSEN
He sure got a lot for his
money/
MUTT AND JEFF
By Bud Fisher
El
JITTER
ou rr wiggling... the astt school
WANTS YOU TO POSE FOPA SKETCH
CLASS TONIGHT*
AND I WANT
YOU TO LOOK
By Arthur Pointer
By Bert Thomas
'This may be the last snow well have. Tm makin'
a snowman that'll be big enough to last 'till
the fourth of July."
'.. . and when he calls, I'm going to tell him
I just don't hang around the 'phone waiting
for him to call!"
Nursery Motifs
LOOSE
^WERPUli$
EASY! No
■; skill required.
Handles like
*1 putty-.hardens
jl into wood.
HE SAYS
ORA
DENTURE 'CLEANSER
“Since using ORA my denture ia al
ways clean and sparkling,” says Man
N. Serlick, Portland, Me.
DENTISTS PRAISE ORA
In a survey, sn overwhelming maior*
ity of dentists praised this marvelous
new cleanser. No harmful brushing
that can ruin dentures. Just place ia
ORA solution for 16 minutes or over
night. Removes tobacco stains. ORA
is guaranteed not to harm dentures*
Get ORA today. All druggists.
A Product of McKossoa A
“IT’S A
BEAUTIFUL I
IN CHICAGO"
M ARY and. her Little Lamb;
the Three Blind Mice; Peter,
Peter, Pumpkin Eater; Humpty
Dumpty; Jack and Jill—fourteen
little nursery rhyme motifs done
in red and black are included in
this dye-fast transfer pattern.
Children’s play suits, aprons,
dressing gowns, crib and bed
quilts, towels, curtains, can be
made gay, entertaining, by rfteans
of this simple, inexpensive trans
fer process. No embroidery is
needed.
Send 25c for the NURSERY RHYME
TRANSFERS in TWO COLORS (Pattern
No. 406> transferring and laundering in
structions. YOUR NAME. ADDRESS.
PATTERN NUMBER to dAROL CUR
TIS. Box 229. Madison Square StaUon,
New York 10, N.Y.
Patterns ready to fill orders Immedi
ately. For special handling of order via
first elass mail inelade an extra Be per
pattern.
AT YOUR GROCER’S
• . .
Everett Mitchell—Nation
ally known farm radio
commentator — Master of
ceremonies on the National
Farm and Home Hour.
FARM AND HOME HOUR
TUMI IN YOUR IOCAl NBC STATION tVlRT SATURDAY
a service to Agriculture
in USDA Headlines
in World-wide coverage of Agricultural Events
in National Market Summary
in Whitey Berquist and the Homesteaders
in Farm and Home Quartet
brought to you by:
CALLIS-
% ■TIAOOt OIVISI
MIlWAUHli I. U t
D
BUILDERS OE POWER EQUIPMENT FOR THE FAMILY FARM
This Illinois Farmer Says:
“I CAN ALWAYS DEPEND ON FIRESTONE OPEN CENTERS
TO TAKE ME THROUGH"
MORE AM MORE OPEN CENTER BUYERS
m
mm*
?ire$tont
# CHAMPIONS
M 1 farm 240 acres of black loam, and Fve found that there
arc. times when I need tires with extra traction to get my work
done. I choose Firestone Open Centers for my farm, because
they have the traction that will always take me through. In
my opinion they're the beat tractor area a farmer can use.”
Lawkbnc* O. La&son
Obion, Illinois
T here's only one sure way to tell the
difference between tractor tires, and
that is to put them to work. On any
job, you can soon see that the Firestone
Champion Open Center outpulls all
other open center tires.
From the tractor seat you'll soon see
why it outpulls all other tires. It's the
only open center tire with Power-Arc
traction bars, tapered and curved to
take -a full-traction bite deep into the
ground. And it's the only tire that is
designed to cup the soil for a stronger
grip and give positive cleaning as well.
Of course if you are one of the million
or more farmers who prefer a traction-
center type of tire, be sure to get the only
traction-center tire ever built . . . the
Firestone Champion Traction Center.
Buy Firestone Champions for your
tractor. You'll find them the best tires
you can use.
Always Buy Tires Built By FIRESTONE, Originate
of The First Practical Pneumatic 'Tractor Tin
Buior the Vote* of Nnstomo «s i
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