The sun. [volume] (Newberry, S.C.) 1937-1972, December 21, 1951, Image 7
■V
. •
V
*rn r i r ■> i i ji.r*':' tw i r 1 r«-
VIRGIL
THE NEWBERRY SUN. NEWBERRY. S. C.
—
VES-VOUR AUNT ELLA
IS SICK SO I HAJE 10
PRC DINNER FOR
HEV- —S.( 'JOUR COUSINS
VDU 60IN'
AWAV,
HOW
ABOUT
MV
PINNER
7
YOUR I
FATHER WILL^
TAKE CARE
OP THAT
POF^S
60NNA COOK
MV
VES-,
By Lea Kleit
nspnccrrari -
AND EAT THOSE COOtfES^
MTMS PW4TRV-TMEm.j
HELP SPOIL SOUR
APPETITE
yw'""- v -
’ SUNNYSIDE
Mg. SMEDBALL, TVE
BEEN hebe four
MONTHS AND I THINK
rrs HtGMTMME X
SET A AA/JUr IN
SALARY'
by CloHc S. Horn
cop ^
\
I'LL TELL VOU
WHAT. MISS MEC£A-
TGOID. I CANT
EEALLV AFFOBD IT-
%
BUT PCOM NOW ON/ VOU CAN
CALL * VOUG SELF A PRIVATE
SECRETARV tsJSTEAD OF
r / A STENOGRAPHER JV
RIMIN' TIME
Qmmewhoukeoi
A LOT
Bought a strange-lookims
EARTHENWARE POT-
*IT REALLV* SAID SHE,
“IS OF NO USE TOME—
By POSEN
’Butthimkofthe bargain
i got! 0
y\ 1
iVf'Vi'ifHrt?
s
Easy Out
Junior—“Pop, if we breathe oxy
gen by day, what do we breathe at
night? ,r
Pop—“Nitrogen**.
■■ ■■ . e ■—
Smart Girl
Abigail—*‘I know the capital of
North Carolina.’V
John—“ReaUyr*
Abigail—“No, Raleigh.**
Desirous
“My heart yearns for you,” the
ardent young suitor whispered to
the millionaire’s daughter. “Won’t
you marry me?”
“Oh, John, you haven’t a penny,”
she replied. “I can’t marry you.”
“Oh, come on,** he urged. “Be
a support.”
EAST CHOICE
ESSIE
m
HOW MUCH DO
VOU THINK
I WEIGH?
By NICK
\ » !
mm
NFORMATION
MOTT AND JEFF
By Bud Fisher
A SILVER
DOLLAR! W/ILL
VDU HELP ME
LOOK FOR IT;
muttp
A SILVER
DOLLAR?
YEH.Vou KNOW
ONE OF THOSE
BIS SILVER
dollars*
oh, r didn’t^
LOSE ANY—
BUT IT WOULD
BE FUN IF WE
N.—wT} - *
The young man obviously was
embarrassed. He explained halting
ly, *T’m supposed to bring home
either a casserole or a camisole. I
can’t remember which.”
“That dilemma is easily re
solved,” chuckled the erudite store
keeper. “Is the chicken dead or
alive?”
Invitation
Pawnbroker's sign: “See me at
your earliest inconvenience.”
JITTER
WvBMEN
ANDH/WENT SHOTA SINGLE
tVTVB MB! OUT ALL DAY
By Arthur Pointer
Course of Events
During History class the teacher
asked, “What happened in 1483?”
“Luther was born,” answered a
student promptly.
’‘Correct! What happened in
1487?”
After a long pause, “Luther was
four years old.”
Me, Too
“I heard something this morning
that opened my eyes.”
“So did I—an alarm clock.”
STILL AT IT
WYLPE AND WOOLY
/ I'VE GOT A NOTION TO RUN FOR
SHERIFF, SHERIFF. I COULD WHIP
YOU iN AN ELECTION, METH/NKS/
$0 HOtiP HO/ what's
THE FIRST THING YOU
WOULD CO IF YOU
GOT ELECTED ?
By Bert Thomas'
MY FIRST PROJECT
WOULD BE TO CORRECT
ALL THE MISTAKES YOUVE
MADE IN THE PAST
25 YEARS.
I SEE. AND WHAT WOUUP
YOU DO THE REST OF
THAT MORNING ?/
A
PHCffiPOR
|SuPPU£S
!ffj
*
*
/ ~
"Since they footled* the price of haircuts, I find
r to stall my f
getting one."
, . *P r
it's lots easier to stall my folks off about
"'ft
/.
0
y a,
I
\ I
n
I
i
After five years of fighting, they
had divorced some twenty years
ago. Now, for the first time in that
long span, they were meeting at the
dude ranch. She looked at him and
chirped. “Well, well, Ralph darling.
The only hair you seem to have re
tained are the brows over your
fading eyes!”
“True, my precious,” he an
swered. “And the only curves you
have left are the circles under
yours.” .
Not At All
Mother (with concern)—“Hallie,
Carl brought you home very late
last night, didn’t he?”
Hallie—“Yes, Mother—it was mid
night. Dj,d the noise disturb you?”
Mother—“Oh, no, it wasn’t the
noise that disturbed me. It was the
silence.”
Gosh, Dad, your credit must be no good. They
turned me down for a charge account at the
soda fountain T
A THOUGHT
In a small town where two
brothers are engaged in the re
tail coal business a religious
revival was held and one of the
brothers got converted. For
weeks he tried to persuade his
partner in business to join the
church. One day he asked:
“Why can’t you get religion
and join the church like I did?*'
“It’s a fine thing for you to
belong to the church,” replied
the other, “but if I join the
church who’ll weigh the coal?”
HE PROSPERS
DOUBLE COST
I understand you have been hav
ing your family tree looked up.
Yes and it cost me five thousand
dollars.
Quite expensive, wasn’t it?
Yes, but it cost only two thousand
to have it looked up. The other three
thousand was what J paid to have
it hushed up.
A man that couldn’t read or write
signed his checks with two X’s. He
prospered and one day the cashier
of the bank noticed a check with
three X’s signed to it. Not being
sure whether he should honor the
check, he called the man and said:
I have a check here signed with
three X’s — it looks like your check,
but I wasn’t sure.
Yes, it’s my check. You can honor
**•
But tell me, what’s the idea sign
ing three X’s?
Well, I’m doing pretty good and
my wife thought I should take a
middle name.
Hang On
First painter—“Do you have a
good hold on your brush up there
on the ceiling?”
Second painter—“Yes.”
First—“O.K. I’m taking your lad
der away.”
Caught In Act
When Roger, 4, saw a repairman
fixing a sandbox in the park, he
cried, “Oh, there’s the sandman.”
Couldn’t Ten
An elderly southern visitor in the
studio audience of “Strike It Rich”
was asked if the New York weather
bothered him.
‘Til say,” he answered. “It was
so cold last night I couldn’t sleep.”
“I suppose your teeth chattered
all night,” said emcee Warren Hull.
“I don’t know.” replied the visi
tor. “I didn’t sleep with 'em.”
s.
Shiny Wit
Golfer—“Notice any improvement
since last week?”
Caddy—“Yeah. You’ve had your
clubs shined.”
RELIABLE
Irate Traveler: “Of what earthly
use is a timetable when the trains
are always late?”
Conductor: “Well, sir, there’s
some folks take a certain satisfac
tion from knowin* just how late
they be.”
Example
“Give a definition
Flack: “Give a definition of
space.”
Glenn: “Space Is where there Is
nothing. I can’t explain it exactly
but I have it in my head all right”
Not The Reason
While a small boy was fishing
one morning he Accidentally lost
his foothold and tumbled into the
creek. As an old man on the bank
was helping him out he said: “How
did you come to fall in the river,
my little man?”
“I didn’t come to fall in the
river. I came to fish,” replied the
boy.
EXPERT
An Irishman got a job at an ob
servatory. During his first night’s
duty he paused to watch a learned
professor who was peering through
a large telescope. Just then a star
fell.
“Man alive!” exclaimed the as
tonished Irishman. “You’re a folne
shoL”
WRONG NUMBER
The doctor answered the
’phone. Turning to his wife, he
said: “Quick, get me my bag.
The man says he cannot live
without me.”
“Just a minute,” said his wife,
who had picked up the receiver,
“that call is for our daughter,
Ethel.”
Watch Me!
Minnie Pearl was driving her car
when she was stopped by a police
man.
“You can’t make a left turn
here,” he admonished.
“Oh yes, I can,” she replied. “I
learned that in my second lesson.”
Evidence
Blanche: Why isn’t he a good
doctor?
Grade: He can’t be any good.
Look at his patients—they’re all
sick.
SEWIN8 CIRCLE PATTERNS
Play Clothes Suit Boy or Girl
Beautifully Styled for Women
i '
8526
l-l yn.
M AKE some practical play
clothes for those youngsters
with this sew-easy pattern. Suit
able for boy or girl, the cover-alls
come in two versions, the duck ap
plique can be made from scraps.
\
• • •
* *
Pattern No. 8526 la. a eew-rite perfo
rated pattern' In sizes 1, 2; 3. 4, 5, 6.8
years. Size 2, coveraU snort sleeve, 2 3/8
yards of 39-inch; jacket, long sleeve. 1%
yards; bib overaU.- 2Vi yards.
The Pall and Winter STYLIST is a
complete guide in planning a smart, well
rounded winter wardrobe. Gift patterns
orlnted inside the book- 25 cents.
A simply styled, charming al
occasion frock designed eat
pressly to Batter a woman’s figure.
Soft shoulder shirring, paneled
skirt, choice of sleeves are pleas
ing details.
Pattern No. 8660 Is a sew-rite perfo
rated pattern in sizes 34. 36. 38. 40, 42, 44.
46, 48. Size 36. short sleeve. 4 yards of
38-inch
SEWING CIRCLE PATTERN DEPT
267 West Adams St.. CUcage 6. W
Enclose 30c in coin for each pat
tern. Add 5c for 1st Class Mail If
desired.
Pattern No. Size,...
Name (Please Print*
Street Address or P o! Box No
PLANNING FOR THE FUTURE?
BUY U.S. DEFENSE BONDS!
IF PETER Bun (MS ttUMMlEP UP WM j f
FOR FACT 55^
"■‘■“ft: s
QUICK!
RUBIN _ ,
THE ORIGINAL BAUME ANALGESIQUB
’
.
s mm •
■
mmL
THI # S':
FIGHT
IS YOURS
FIGHT
JOIN THE MARCH OF DIMES
THE NAT10NM EOUNDATtO# fOfi INfANMf PAHAIYSIS • f»ANKlt* 0 POOSEYEiT. fOUNDER