The sun. [volume] (Newberry, S.C.) 1937-1972, November 23, 1951, Image 7
Said a business-like fellow
NAMED HOPP,
Whose wife preferred bach
TO BE-BOf>
,l I DONt MIND AT ALL
Being dragged to the hall-
’'l FIND THAT I SLEEP LIKE
* A TOP/*
MUTT AND JEFF
THEYPEAFTErME/
brwgmemy .
HORSE/
vbh.doc^verv
halfhour he
WAKES UPAHD
SHOUTSTMEVRE
AFTER ME! BRIH6
ME MV HORSE/
Tthedocsesto
Put ice pack’s oh
JEFFS HEAD/HE HAS
hallucinations/
By Bud Fisher
JITTER
By Arthur Pointer
WYLDE AND WOOLY
By Bert Thomas
AFTER A REMARK LIKE THAT I
FEEL COMPELLED TO SEi'JE HER
A CORSAGE OF CACTUS*
'There's nobody home but me and I'm not allowed to
use the telephone."
'I can't live without Walter. Wish he'd hurry up and
introduce himself!"
BEHIND ON THE NEWS
A salesman in Missouri was held
up in a small town because heavy
rains had caused a washout on the
railroad., “This looks like the
flood,” he observed to a waitress
in the local hotel.
“The what?” she asked.
“The flood,” he repeated. “You
know the flood when Noah saved
the animals on the ark. You must
have read about that.”
The waitress assured him grave*
ly, “Mister, on account of aU this
rain, I ain't seen a paper-in four,
days.”
Cause to Be
“You’re a pretty ’ sharp boy.
Tommy.”
“Well, I ought to be. Pa takes
me into his room and strops me
three or four times a week.”
Help!
The paper hanger has no sense.
He isn’t smart at all;
For though his business is im
mense.
It drives him to the walL
Same Difference
“My son plays the piano like
Paderewski.”
“How can you say that?”
“He uses both hands.”
MISUNDERSTANDING
/
A little man was ushered into the
witness-box. After the usual pre-
lliminaries, the magistrate told him
jto tell the court what happened.
The man began in rambling nar
rative and Anally ended up with:
“And then my wife hit me on
the head with an oak leaf.”
“Well, that couldn’t have hurt
you, surely,” said the magistrate.
“Oh, couldn’t it?” replied the
little man, with feeling. “It was the
oak leaf from the center of the
dining-room table.”
Gay Blade
An American was being urged to
betake himself to Athens to see the
old ruins.
“Nope,” he decided definitely,
“I’m going to Paris to see the young
ruins!” '
High Opinion
One night, when palywright W. S.
Gilbert was dining with a friend, a
well known actor entered the res
taurant. •
“I’ve never thought much of
him,” confided the friend. “How
about you?”
“No one could have a higher
opinion of him than I,” Gilbert
said. “And I think he’s repulsive.”
To The Point
Boss (to stenographer?—“Are you
doing anything Sunday, Miss
Jones?”
Steno (hopefully)—“Why, no.”
The Big Brute—“Then try to get
here a little earlier on Monday
morning, will you?”
ASSOCIATION
In this family there was a large
number, of small children. Little
Willie, age six, was taken in one
morning to see his father, who hap
pened to be laid up with influenza.
Little Willie was quiet, almost rev
erent, in the sickroom. When it
was time for him to go, he went up
to his father’s bedside and said:
“I bin good, ain’t I, pop?”
“Yes, son,” the old man whis
pered.
“Well, then, kin I see the baby?”
TOO BAD
1st Tenant: “The superintend
ent says that the woman who
Just moved into that apartment
on the third floor is anemic.”
2nd Tenant: “My, my—and she
looks Just like an American,
doesn’t she?”
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Greenland's Iceberg
Export Drops Behind
Greenland’s largest export, ice
bergs, hit a new low this year
when, of an output estimated at
10,000 to 15,000 bergs, none suc
ceeded in reaching the crowded
shipping lanes between North
America and Europe.
| The largest Arctic icebergs take
off from the continually advanc
ing glaciers and icecap fringe of
Greenland’s west coasts, says
the national geographic society.
In an average year about 400 of
the total production survive an
1,800-mile southward drift before
disintegrating in the warm Gulf
Stream. This year no icebergs
were reported below the 46th
parallel along the southern tip of
Newfoundland.
Moving south through Baffin
Bay and Davis Strait to Lab
rador, many of the crystal “cas
tles” and plain “flattops” jam
against the coast or are caught
in the natural traps of islands and
bays. A few swing into the Lab
rador current and continue south
ward. Some drift toward BeUe
Isle Straight and some move
around Newfoundland by way of
Grand Banks to invade main traf
fic arteries and threaten shipping.
Major Arctic icebergs are pro
duced by about 18 “name” gla
ciers. The Humboldt, near Thule,
north of Cape York, is one that
supplies outsize models. Moun
tains of ice a mile across and ris
ing 200 feet above water have
been reported, but the largest are
puny compared to the 20-mile-long
bergs sighted by Australian air
reconnaissance in the Antarctic in
1948. *
Telling ’Em Off
An immigrant who had recently
become a naturalized citizen was
applauding a contingent of Loyalty
Day paraders in New York City.
A man standing in front of him
turned and with a superior atti
tude demanded to know why he
was applauding.
The Russian-born citizen re
plied, “I am applauding good peo
ple who are affirming their faith
in democracy.”
“And if you don’t like it,” he
suggested, “why don’t you go back
to^vhere I came from.”
Apply Black Leaf 40 to
roosts with handy Cap
Brush. Fumes rise, killing
lice and feather mites,while
chickens perch. One ounce
treats 60 feet of roosts
—90 chickens. Directions
on package. Ask for Black
Leaf 40, the dependable
insecticide of many uses..
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od House*.'?pi
GOT A COLD
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RELIFF
*
K
KIDNEYS
MUST REMOVE
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When kidney function down down, manr
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No Cooking. No Work. Real Saving.
Here’s an old home mixture your mother
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Make a syrup with 2 cups granulated
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Now put 2)$ ounces of Pmex into a pint
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FOR EXTRA CONVENIENCE GET NEW
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wu v longer .—,
If reduced kidney function is getting you
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Don’t neglect your kidneys If these condi
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It's Wonderful the Way
Chewing-Gum Laxative
igp?! Acts Chiefly ta
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• Here’s the secret millions of folks :
discovered about hen-a-mikt, the
cm chewing-gum laxative. Yea,
why rmr-A-Mnrr's action is so
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Doctors say that many other ]
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food you need for health and
You feel weak, worn out.
But gentle rarf-a-Mrirrs taken as
ommended, works chiefly In thg
bowel where it removes only
good food! You avoid that f
tired, worn-out feeling. Use
M NOT |
goodTood
typical
and feel your “peppy,
rnar-A-MiNTl No Increase In
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energetic self!
ran
IF PETER PAIN SHOOTS you FUU OF
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Nature Boy
“Above all,” the doctor argued,
“you must eat more fruit, and par
ticularly the skin of the fruit. The
skin contains all the vitamins.
What, by the way, is yeur favorite
fruit?”
' The patient looked gloomy,
“Coconuts,” he said.
0opyTU Mi««.w Tbo *-
a Co.,
QUICK!
RUB IN
THE ORIGINAL BAUME ANALGESIQUE
• i
Mak&a note
*fhink of ywrfhroaf:..
^ GAMES
After all the Mildness Tests.••
CAMEL LEADS ALL OTHER BRANDS BY BILLONS