Historical Newspapers of South Carolina

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—. THE NEWBERRY SUN, NEWBERRY. S. C. VIRGIL By Leti Klcii SUNNYSIDE RIMIN' TIME NEMLY WED GAL NAMED Mcquak Showed her HUS8AM0 some BJSailTS SHED MADE; ’THEYHE OEUOOUS.'*HE CRIED, As MS YAFESWEtiawmi PRIOE- By POSEN *Bur fVE BROKEN TWO TEETH, IM AFRAID/* MUTT AND JEFF GOSH, SINCE MUTT IS PITCHIN'AND I'M PLAYIN'RELO I 00 NOTHIN' BUT CHASE . AFTER THE BAU- L AO. THE TIME/ By Bud Fithcr JITTER |YS AWFULY HOr....WHYDONV M3U MAKE SOME LEMONADE/ WYLDE AND WOOLY "Your cousin is cute. Taffy. When is she feing home? 4 TfiE PUBLIC PAYS A ihort while after his marriage, late in life, to the Baroness de Reuter, eccentric publisher James Gordon Bennett received a bill from his wife’s milliner. One look at the staggering amount was enough to make him see red. Marching into his wife’s room, he showed her the bill and demand ed: ‘Did you order all these hats?" She nodded her head. Bennett, furious, stared % at her helplessly. Then slowly he turned and walked away, muttering to himself: "Someone’s going to pay for this. Someone’s going to pay for this." Suddenly an idea struck him. Summoning the manager of his newspaper, he ordered the price of the sheet to be raised a penny. Putting His Foot In It The old engineer pulled his engine up to the water tank and briefed tl-i new fireman, who got up on the tender and brought the spout down all right. However, the new fire man caught his foot in the chain and stepped into the tank. The engineer watched with a jaundiced eye as the new man floundered around in the water. “Just fill the tank with water, sonny,” he said. "No need to stamp it down." We’re Not Bad Ifte guys who think our jokes are rough Would quickly change their vi jws If they’d compare the ones they read With'those we’re scared to use. Salt and Pepper The only good thing that can be said about some of our roads is that when riding on them it is never necessary to knock the ashes off a cigar. Considerate Nature couldn’t make us perfect, so she did the next best thing; she made us blind to our faults. LEND-LEASE At a national Sunday school con vention in New York, answers were given to the roll call by states. When the state of Texas was called, a brawny specimen of southern man hood stepped out into the aisle, and with a strident voice exclaimed: "We represent the great state of Texas. The first white woman born in Texas is still living. She now has a population of over three million." There was a pause of bewilder ment for a moment, and then a voice from the galleries rang out clear and distinct: “Send that woman out to Wyo ming. We need her!" Often Prone There’s only one thing standing in the way of faster driving, now: Pe destrians. ETIQUETTE A spinster was shocked at the language used by workmen repair ing cables near her home, so she wrote to the company that owned the cables. The manager immedi ately asked the foreman on the job to make a report and here’s what the foreman said: "Me and Spike Williams were on this job. I was up the pole and ac cidentally let the hot lead fall on Spike—and it went down his neck. Then Spike looked up at me and said: "Really, Harry, you must be more carefuL” i PRICE OF PEACE "What I can’t understand,” re marked a plain citizen, "is if this congressman is as unpopu lar and obnoxious to everyone as the newspapers claim, how can he get so many concessions from the House?" 'That’s easy," spoke up an other. "Suppose you’re in busi ness, and have a let ef important things to do, and a man comes in and sits down beside yon and be gins to file a saw. Wouldn’t yop give him anything be wanted?" New Blossoms C OLOR and lacy charm are yours for pin-money by follow ing this easy pattern! Embroidery and spider-web crochet for your linens. Simplest needlework! Pattern C7353; transfer 6 motifs about 6x11 inches; crochet directions. • • ^saavmgv OV, All. O] P. O. Box 16S, Old Chelae* Stall#* New Yerk 11, N, Y. Enclose 10 cents for pattern. Pattern No % Name (Please Print) Street Address or P.O. Box No. City State FIRST AID tome AILING HOUSE by ROGER C. WHITMAN Question: Several times I have plastered bad parts of rooms and each time, try though I may,- cracks appear in the plaster upon drying. I have tried retarding the drying, wetting the lath, but to no avail. Can you help me? Also, please tell me how to mix this plaster and in what proportion? Answer: If you are not trying to replaster an entire room, merely to patch up some cracks or other bad places, I advise you to get a prepared patching plaster which needs only to be mixed with water to make a paste. This is slower drying than plaster of Paris, which hardens too rapidly to be easily worked. (Glue dissolved in the mixing water will slow the time of hardening; so will vinegar, mixed half and half with the water.) If the patching job has been done correctly and cracks reappear, particularly around window and door openings, it is possible that structural weakness is the cause. If so, the defect should be located and corrected. Question: My husband is re modeling the kitchen, using tile- board for the ceiling. The bath room is directly above. When ever water is spilled on the floor it leaks down into the kitchen. We have tried caulking around the fixtures, with little success. What can we do about it? Answer: The bathroom should have a good waterproof flpor covering, such as clay tile, as phalt tile or linoleum. Until you do this, you will continue to have leaks. He Found Out How did your father know we used his car yesterday? Well, you know that fat guy we ran into? Yes. That was father. —•— Faulty Brakes Speed? Say, that car can’t be stopped on the hills. Mine was that way, too, before 1 had the brakes fixed. —•— Got The Point What happened, George? Puncture. You should have watched out for it. The guidebook warned us there was a fork in the road about this point. Housework Easy Without Nagging Backache Who* kidney function dowa down, many folks complain of naninc backache, loot of pep and energy, bendacnee and diuineee. Don’t suffer longer with these discomforts If reduced kidney function is getting you down—-due to such common causes as stress and strain, over-exertion or exposure to cold. Minor bladder Irritations due to cold, dampness or wrong diet may cause getting up nights or frequent passages. Don’t neglect your kidneys if these condi tions bother you. Try Doan's Pills—a mild diuretic. Used successfully by millions for over 60 years. While often otherwise caused. It’s a maxing how many times Doan’s give happy relied from tbees diacomiorta—nelp , the 16 miles of kidney tubes and filters flush out waste. Got Doan’s PlUs todayl Doan’s Pills 8«r YOU even Are POP 5CM€ TbNlTV CRISP-TENDER DELICIOUS POP CORN Yodora checks perspiration odor THE WAY Made with a iace cream base. Yodora is actually soothing to normal ikina. No harsh chemicals or irritating salts. Won’t barm skin or clothing. Stays soft and creamy, never get* grainy. ] Try gentle Yodora-feel the wonderful j i difference! U. $. SAVINGS BONDS Art Now U. S. DEFENSE BONDS Don’t gamMe with fire— the odds ■» against yen! I SPCRTSCOPE ~l BtttY G O O . demand rr. - ‘ On 1047 THERE WERE 459 HEATS “A TURF RECORD. OF THE TIES, 124 WERE FOR WIN, 125 FOR PLACE , I33 FOR THE SHOW POSITION ANO 77 FOR TOOTHPICKS LOCATE NAIL HOLES IN NEWLY PAPERED WALLS TO SAVE DRILLING NEW HOLES. DRIVEN INTO EACH HOLE, THE TOOTH PICKS PUNCTURE THE NEW PAPER AS IT IS PASTED DOWN. ■— 1 ■ 1 ' ■ 1 I ■ ■■S ■ Ml. ■ ! ■ Mh ■ I I^V———i—— ACCORDING TO A SURVEY OP DOCTORS IN EVERY BRANCH OF MEDiaNE.ee IN ALL PARTS OF THE COUNTRY More Doctors Smoke CAMELS than any other cigarette!