The sun. [volume] (Newberry, S.C.) 1937-1972, June 08, 1951, Image 7

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9~ IT MUST* *—” BEEN 30METUM& HE ATt by Clark S. Haas The visiting pastor at the state prison approached a timid looking inmate and asked him how he came to be confined in such a place. “Wen,’* said the pnsoner, "they claimed I stole a ring. I had a good case and my lawyer worked hard to get me off, but they sentenced me just the same." "My poor fel low. How unfortunate," exclaimed the pastor, puzzled by the seeming injustice. "But tell me, how did they happen to sentence you?" "Oh, it was quite an accident," explained the prisoner. "Everything would have been all right if they hadn’t found the ring in my pocket.’ ^ IVE MAD IT NOW FOR MANY YEAKS- \ TO SMOKE HIS A TREAT— By POSEN WHAT 1 LIKE BEST ABOUT IT JIM, ITS ODOR IS SO SWEET— THEM BAYS ARE SOME FOREVER/ One At A Time The man who rows a boat not have the time to rock it does NOT SO TOUGH Pattern envelope No. R2908 contains tracing pattern for applique and pieces; diagram of quilt; simple quilting instruc tions: material requirements; embroider ing and finishing directions. EVEW IF HE HIT vou first, count to loo BEFORE MX) .LOSE YOUR Send 25 cents todav for vour copy of the Anne Cabot ALBUM. It contains a wealth of crocheting, -knitting, embroider ing ideas—four gift patterns printed in- aide the book. SEWING CIRCLE NEEDLEWORK 367 West Adams St., Chicago S, HI. Enclose 20c in coin for each pat tern. Add 5c for 1st Class Mail If desired. Pattern No I AM COUNTING, BESSIE- Name (Please Print) Street Address or P.O. Box No. aJca 3^ BUT I WANT TO KNOW WHERE TO FIND HIM WHEN I FINISH COUNTING- m V. - . WiNii w';; 1i|| i f t ~ V Tig 'Lt f * * City SUte MUTT AND JEFF RID YOUR HOME of INSECTS Leaf j ■ttaa and the handy dispenser ejects e cloud of aerosol fog which kills flies, mosqui toes, roaches, ants, bed bugs, moths end diver fish. Leaves no unpleas ant odor and is harm less to humans and pets when used as directed. Sold at dmg. hardware and farm supply stores. TOBACCO BY-PRODUCTS B CHEMICAL CORPORATION • RICHMOND. VIRGINIA !»isscf •tilts? J ji\ By Bud Fisher The conductor of a famous Phil adelphia orchestra accepted with equanimity the announcement that his first violinist wag giving solos on The radio, indorsing cigarettes and playing for weddings and funer als. But when he also heard that the violinist was opening a string of music schools throughout the state, he grew concerned and summoned the man for a conference. "I like a man with ambition and initiative," he declared, "but it seems to me you’re carrying things a bit far. When do you sleep?” The violinist looked him straight In the eye and answered, ‘‘During your rehearsals. Maestro." All Too True! t Two drivers, from neighboring (and rival) states were having a bull session' . '. . each bragging about his own state. One of them, more wordy than the other, was getting the best of the argument. Finally, the loser, as a last shot, said: "Well, in my state we have the finest governor and the best legislature that money can buy I" GOOD ARITHMETIC JITTER |ft / i Wonderful the Way twing-Gum Laxative Acts Chiefly to JITTER’, 6ET0UT OF ) { YOU MIGHT AS HERE.. YOU MAKE //WELL PAY ME NOW ME NERVOUS AND )f YOU‘U HANCIOSINK SPOIL. NY GAME . / S THIS IN ONE TO REMOVE WASTE -NOT GOOD FOOD i the secret millions of folks have _.„ad about rat-a-Mnrr. the mod ern chewing-gum laxative. Tea. here Is Why rr- N-A-MXNT'g action Is so wonder fully different) Doctors say that many other laxatives ■tart their “flushing" action too soon ... i stomach ; in the stomach where food Is being ed. Large doses of such laxatives digestion, flush sway nourishing food you need for health and energy. You feel weak, worn out. But gentle rxat-a-acnrr. taken as roo- nded. works chiefly In the lower where It removes only waste, not food I You avoid that typical weak, worn-out feeling. Use raw-a-MiifT msal wvtvw M rvs»r»r»ty ** ssnssrfpsit.lf* JKAlf I By Arthur Pointer WYLDE AND WOOLY feel your “peppy." energetic self I Get rl No Incn increase In price—still , SO# or only IS#. FEEN-A-MINT W FAMOUS OWWWG-CUM l#»aTHfS KIDNEYS H MUST REMOVE EXCESS WASTE ES.* Whan kidney function Hows down, many complain of nsgxinf backache, loaa of isrgy, headaches and dizziness, r longer with thssa discomforts kidney function is getting you ' to such common causes as stress strain, over-exertion or exposure to Minor bladder irritations due to cold, or wrong diet may cause getting or frequent passages. Don't neglect your kidneys if these condi tions bother you. Try Doan’s Pills—a mild diuretie. Used snrreasfnlly by millions for 50: i While often otherwise caused. how many times Doan’s gfre from those discomforts—Help ■ of kidney tubes end filters pta. Get Doan’s Pills today! Dom Pius Twice Told Tale Gets Motorist Into Trouble WATERTOWN, Mass. — James E. Penny will confirm the addage that you can’t fool people all of the time. Stopped by two policemen for a traffic violation, he told one of the officers a sad tale of family troubles and was waved on with out a ticket—but he didn’t get very far. The officer related the story to his companion, who remembered hearing the same lines before. I've had the impression lately that the Wild West is a lot wilder today than it was when we were kids!" "ft The Korean campaign has re vived stories of fantastic poker games in rest areas, with GI’s risk ing a whole month’s salary on a single hand. Typical is the tale of the Missouri farm hand who professed to know nothing of the game. His buddies saw a chance for some easy pick ings and enthusiastically urged him to participate. He lost moderately and unspec- tacularly for some time. Then came the big hand of the evening. One after another, the players raised the limit. The Missourian stayed each time. Finally came the showdown. Player No. 1 had an ace-high straight. No. 2 had a heart flush. No. 3 triumphantly produced a king- high full house, and was about to rake in the pot when the boy from Missouri said quietly, “One minute, mister. I ain’t quite sure, but I think I got you beat with these two pairs of sevens.” What, We Pray? Don’t you often wonder why it is that they always talk about a doc tor practicing. X 'It's always a shock to look at Tyrone Power for two hours and then leave with Alvin t" STOP SIGN The passenger train had stopped at one of those cross overs where an interlocking tow er stood. The conductor courte ously answered as many ques tions about the delay as he could but they finally got the better of his patience. “Say, conductor, what’s the matter?” came yet another query. “Well, sir,” explained the con ductor slowly, “the le verm an in the tower has red hair and keeps sticking his head out the window and we can’t get the engineer to pass the tower!” Collector’s Item Little Herman had gobbled down a half dollar and his mother was frantic. She ran out into the street crying for help. A man who was passing by said he would be glad to be of aid. He fol lowed her into the house, picked up the youngster and shook him by the heels until the coin fell to the floor. “Well, you certainly knew what to do,” said the thankful mother. “Are you a doctor?** “No, lady,** answered the stran ger, “Im a collector of internal BLESSED RELIQ FROM CONSTIPATION revenue. ’‘After using ALL-BRAN for some months, I feel I must writs to say how much I appreciate whatithas done for me. ALL- “ BRAN has been a marvelous success! ” Mrs. B. Louise ,1106 Pacific Avel, Long Beach 3, CaL Oneof many un- tolicited letters from ALL-BRAN users. Yon, too, can expect , ^ , . relief from constipation due to lack ofdietary bulk. Eat an ounce (about i ✓ \ — r If AlIrMYor’a ATT— ASII11IIEIIESSUK MOROLINE ( f W O •„ E U M J i p 10 days, l empty carton to Kellogg*** Creek, Mich. Get DOUBLE YOUR MONEY BACK! 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