Historical Newspapers of South Carolina

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\ THE NEWBERRY SUN, NEWBERRY, S. C. BOBBY SOX By Marty Links “Give me until next recess to think it over, Alvin. After all, getting engaged is an important step!” “You can take the basket off now, Gertrude— we’re past it!” NANCY By Ernie Bushmiller LITTLE REGGY By Margarita ^WHAT DO YOUVNOTHING-^ WANT ME TO JUST STAND/ DO LITTLE,^ THERE WHILE > SOY? I WHISTLE., MS' ^Ovi 6HO\A\i*G f Tttt LADY OCTUPUSj JITTER By Arthur Pointer mui. m OSBi im REG’LAR FELLERS By Gene Byrnes EASY ON THE CLUTCH! The new locomotive on No. 22 was not behaving .as it should. First it would move forward a few yards, ■ then, with-a great deal Of puffing, it would shift back to its original posi- tionj For 10 minutes this had been going on, while the passengers in the train raved. At last one of the passengers un able to contain himself longer, stuck his head out of the window and hailed a brakeman. “What on earth is the matter with this rattletrap?” he demandad. Leaning against one of the posts of the train shed, the brakeman spat, then grinned, and said: “I’m not sure, mister, but I think the engineer is teaching his wife to drive.” —-v MIRACLE MAN - Mrs.—What would you think of a man who was constantly deceiving his wife? Mr.—I’d think he was a wizard. Rare Moment Terry—There was something in your wife’s speech that sounded strange. Mr.—Yes; a pause. Statistics Foreigner—Is it true that Amer-. ican women are the most beautiful in the world? Bill—Oh, yes, and we’ve got the figures to prove it! Geneology Mrs.—Is it true that it cost $100 to have my family tree looked up? Mr.—Well, not exactly. I paid $5 to have it looked up, and $95 to have it hushed up! On the List Billy—I’m knee deep in love. Bette—I’ll put you on my wading list! Revised Version Larry—Why do girls kiss each other when they meet? Harry—That’s easy. They do unto others as they would that men should do unto them! * Hard to Get Bette—Has the joke editor got my joke yet? Billy—No, but he’s trying hard. NOT ON MENU Wally—Do you serve ladies at this counter? Waitress—Oh, no, you have to bring your own! Hard to Decide Jean—I don’t know what to do. A dairyman and a butcher have asked me to marry them. ■ * Joan—That’s easy. It’s just a case of marrying for butter or wurst! His Own Responsibility Father—Yes, my boy, I’m a self- made man! Son—Gee, Pop, that’s what I ad mire about you: you always take the blame for everything! Serious Case Mr.—I went to a doctor today about my loss of memory. Mrs.—What did he do? Mr.—Made me pay him in ad vance! Helpless Hubby—It tells here about a man who stayed home with his wife every night for thirty years. Wifey—Ah! That was true love! Hubby—No, it wasn’t. It was paralysis! Hard Times Mr.—If things get too bad, we may have to start using our old wood burner. Mrs.—Oh, well, there’s no fuel like an old fuel! Unsuitable Bill (on farm)—See if you can dig up some clothes to put on the scarecrow. Farmer—How about this suit my son wore at college? Bill—Won’t do—I want to scare the crows, not make them laugh! In Danger Clancy (on phone)—Hello, Nancy, is your house on the carline? Nancy—Yes, of course, why? Clancy—Well, you’d better hurry up and move it; there’s a car com ing! Easy to Get to Mrs.—If I were to die, would you mourn for me? Mr.—Of course I would! And would you visit my grave sometimes? Mr.—Of course. Why ask such a foolish question? You know the cemetery is right on the way to the golf links! SEWim CIRCLE NEEDLEWORK Crocheted Muff and Frilled Hat Strawberry Motifs to Embroider ■ . • n Muff and Hat H ERE is a gay little crocheted muff and frilled hat to delight the lass of six to twelve years. It takes 6 ounces of 4 ply wool in white, red, navy or wine color. Use bright leftover wools to em broider the heart and flower de sign. Try it in white for a little girl—in navy for an older child. • • • To obtain complete crocheting instruc tions for the Warm Muff and Bonnet set (Pattern No. 5817) color chart for work ing peasant embroidery, send 16 cents in coin, your name, address and the pattern number. On most patterns, seam lines are indicated by small round per forations. Mark these, then when sewing, take up their full amount for best fit. Match corresponding notches too. Press each seam as it is finished and clip at corners and curves so it will lie perfectly flat. A small child will not be likely to lose handkerchiefs if a button hole is worked into a corner of each handkerchief permitting it to be buttoned onto the child’s outer garments. One mother sews a but ton inside the pocket o* her boy’s play suits and buttons the hand kerchief to this. Keep a pair of clean gloves near your supply of hosiery during the winter, and don them before put ting on hose. It will save many snags caused from hands that are roughened by cold weather. —•— For boring small holes in plate glass or ordinary window‘pane, a triangular saw file makes a good drill. Apply the file with light pressure and dip in water from time to time. —•— Windows will gleam if washed with water containing a little witch hazel. Strawberry Embroidery /"YNE of the loveliest designs ^ you’ve ever seen for embroid ering on pillow case tubing, on a guest bed sheet, on guest towels or on luncheon cloths. Each straw* berry is one inch in size, to be done in red silk or cotton. Leaves are 1% inches, outlined in green thread—blossoms are in white satin or outline stitch. • • • To obtain transfers for the three Straw berry designs (Pattern No. 5842) coior chart for working, amounts of threads specified, send 16 cents in coin, your name, address and the pattern number. SEWING CIRCLE NEEDLEWORK 530 South WeUs St. Chicago 7, 111, Enclose 16 cents for Pattern. 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