The sun. [volume] (Newberry, S.C.) 1937-1972, September 13, 1940, Image 3
THE SUN. NEWBERRY. S. C. FRIDAY. SEPTEMBER 13, 1940
Kathleen Norris Says:
If You Are Bored With Marriage,
It’s Your Own Fault
(Bell Syndicate—WNU Service.)
By KATHLEEN NORRIS
HERE are terrible mo
ments in any marriage,
when it seems to both man
and woman that the light of
love and happiness has gone out
forever, and the only possible
solution is a complete break.
Sometimes these moments
come in the first year of mar
riage—but not often. Quarrels
are cured then, and tears and
despair forgotten, in the com
fort of making up. And with the
joy of being friends again the
young husband and wife are al
most ready to agree that the
trouble was worth while.
After several years, too, 12 per
haps, or 15, difficulties are less apt
to arrive. If there is fine quality
in both partners, a real willingness
to forget and forgive, to change and
concede, to grow together in habits
and likes, then the marriage gradu
ally becomes a real thing—the most
perfect companionship human be
ings can know in this life.
But in between the first year and
the twelfth year there may come a
bad time. The glamour of honey
moon days is gone, the novelty of
the new life has worn away, life
has fallen into a routine of re
sponsibilities and duties; office,
meals, dusting, telephone, bills, get
ting the children off to school, petty
cares, petty amusements, petty wor
ries.
Dangerous Ye. rs—for Women.
For certain types of women these
are dangerous years, when there
gradually grows upon them a hun
ger for excitement, change, ro
mance; in short, a hunger for self-
expression. For they are apt to
find that self-expression along lines
that hold no interest for the other
member of the team.
Take the example of 36-year-old
Jean Porter, a Springfield wife and
mother. Jean’s husband is employed
by one of the big utilities corpora
tions and earns a salary of about
$100 a week. He travels a good deal,
and is fond of golf, poker, fishing,
movies, and his luncheon club.
Jean taught harmonics in the pub
lic schools before she was married
and has never lost her interest in
music. She plays the organ every
Sunday in a community church of
no special denomination, but writes
that she has no religious convictions.
‘He’s a Good Man But—’
“Everything Bob does or likes, ex
cept our common interest in our
girl and boy, is intensely and fear
fully boring—boring—boring to me!’’
writes Jean. “He is a good man,
who pays his bills and loves his
children; I have never known him to
be mean, although his horrible habit
of teasing me about my aspirations
and my ‘pipe dreams’ and ‘delu
sions of Hollywood success’ are as
bad as meanness. I gave up my
profession when I married, but I
have kept up my organ work, and
naturally I associate with musical
people. Three of these, to whom
Bob especially objects, are a Rus
sian violinist and his American wife,
and his brother, who sings baritone
in the choir where I play the organ.
“Home life, for Bob and me, has
grown to be mere civilities. He is
scornful of everything that means
self-expression to me, and I cannot
reconcile myself to wasting time
upon the sort of entertaining and
party that he likes. Men in to play
card games, frankfurters and coffee
at late hours, trips off in the car
to some place where he can play
golf, while the children and I amuse
ourselves, never any talk of culture
or improvement, never the reading
of any worthwhile books—for Bob’s
only reading is the newspapers, a
couple of weekly magazines, and
INCOMPATIBILITY
The first twelve years of married
life are the most critical, according
to Kathleen Norris. The husband and
wife sometimes tend to drift apart
during these years because they “find
it impossible to develop similar in
terests.” Miss Norris attributes this
to a failure to build upon those inter
ests they do have in common. “This
is not only dangerous, but stupid,”
she explains, “because happiness is
never found ready made.”
the radio weekly—that doesn’t seem
life, to me.
Appreciated by Another.
“I have a church rehearsal one
night a week, and often ask my
friends into my home for an evening
of chamber music. Bob has small
sympathy with the struggles and
handicaps of these foreign-born mu
sicians and accuses me of being in
love with the singer, Vanni. That I
like him, that we have interests and
ambitions in common, that he is
one of the most fascinating and cul
tured gentlemen I ever knew, I do
not deny.
“Incidentally, Vanni is penniless
except for occasional singing en
gagements, and has no intention of
marrying me or anyone else. But
he is sensitive, congenial, stimulat
ing to me, and our love for music is
a great bond. Would you advise
me as to a separation, Bob going
his own way and I mine, with in
finitely less friction than we experi
ence today, and freedom for both?
Surely it isn’t necessary for two
persons of completely different tem
peraments to force themselves into
a position that is a strain on both?”
Build on Common Interests.
Perhaps this letter gives us a rath
er extreme instance of what I was
trying to express. Neither Bob nor
Jean, in this case, has been wise
enough to build, during the years,
upon those interests that they DO
hold in common. They have devel
oped, rather, the things that sepa
rate them, Bob sneering at Jean,
Jean cultivating friends who despise
everything for which Bob stands.
This is not only a dangerous situ
ation but a stupid one. Every wom
an, married or single, has to learn
to live with someone, learn to adapt
herself to that person’s ways of
doing. Women who flatly refuse to
change, to understand, to cultivate
other than their natural tendencies,
are presently lonely women, with
the history of two or three unsuc
cessful marriages behind them, and
with a final dismal conviction that
they might have made a success of
the first marriage, after all.
Women to Blame.
In Jean’s case I think she is to
blame, or largely to blame, as I
do in most cases. For it usually is
the wife who sets the tone of the
marriage. If her husband gets the
idea that what he does is contempti
ble to her, he naturally retaliates.
He wants to show her that he can
have a good time in his own way,
and so the breach between them
widens, and all the spirit and flavor
departs from their married life.
Wiser wives and hu;.bands begin
early in marriage to cultivate simi
lar tastes. The husband may never
appreciate classical music; the wife
may never make a good poker play
er. But companionship is more pre
cious to both than an adolescent de
sire to hurt each other, and so by
degrees each learns to extract from
uncongenial things a certain amount
of pleasure, and the marriage deep
ens from its beginnings into that mi
raculous relationship that only the
most fortunate human beings ever
know. Happiness in being together,
dependence upon each other, the de
light of sharing even the simplest
plans for the children or the holi
days, this is true marriage, and
ninety-nine out of every hundred
wives might achieve it if she would.
Is the tea party the thing of the
past? I sincerely hope not because
there is nothing quite so comfy and
relaxing as a good cup of tea. And
you can make it even more delight
ful by sharing it with a few of your
friends.
The tea hour may be the time to
become utterly feminine, with lazy
discussions on the
fashions of the
| day, the latest
! movie, and even
tales of cute say
ings of Johnnie
and Mary Jane.
Or it may be en
larged with mas
culinity, with the trend of the con
versation leaning more toward cur
rent events, politics, books and even
the arts.
A tea party is one of the sim
plest methods of entertaining, be
cause even though your resources
may be limited, you can ask a few
friends to drop in for tea.
I have a friend who quite often
gives teas on Sunday afternoons.
They are highly successful, not be
cause of her lovely silverware or
china, (because here I must confess
that most of her china does not even
match); they are successful rather,
because her friends gather for the
pleasure of chatting with one an
other. Conversation flies fast and
furiously—but the group is held to
gether by one common bond, the
tea cup.
The most meager necessities
would include a tea tray, on which
the tea set and napkins are placed,
a table from which to serve the tea,
glistening china, and well-polished
silver.
If the party is small you may, as
hostess, pour the tea, asking the
guests to help themselves to cream
or lemon and sugar. If it is a
larger party and it is necessary for
you to constantly greet your guests
as they arrive, ask one of your
friends to preside at the tea table
for you.
The tea that is served must be
good. It not only must be fresh,
but must be hot to be palatable and
1 soothing. If the weather is warm
you may like to serve both hot and
iced tea. Serve the iced tea in tall
glasses which have been chilled pri
or to serving. Sliced lemon and
powdered sugar are necessary ac
cessories for iced tea. Place the
ice cubes in an attractive ice bucket
with the ice tongs near by. As an
I added bit of color and flavor, gar
nish the completed beverage with
sprigs of fresh, cool mint.
Dainty sandwiches, hot buttered
toast, thin slivers of cinnamon toast
and small English muffins are ap
propriate to serve with tea. Popu
lar accompaniments to tea are sand
wiches made from nut bread, sliced
very thin, and buttered.
You may like to use some of the
suggested accompaniments for your
next tea party, to give you that
much sought-after distinction as a
discriminating hostess.
Hot Tea.
Rinse teapot with boiling water.
Allow 1 teaspoon of tea for each
cup and “one for the pot.” Place tea
in teapot, and pour freshly boiling
water over tea leaves. Cover and
allow tea to steep 3 to 5 minutes, as
desired. Remove ball or bag con
taining the leaves, and serve at
once.
Chicken Sa.idwiches With
Cranberry Sauce.
Right here and now we put in our
plea for revolt against chicken sand
wiches that are bone dry! Have you
tried putting a thin slice of canned
cranberry sauce in with the chick
en? We eat cranberry sauce with
chicken when it’s served on a plate.
Why not in a sandwich? Try a slice
of canned cranberry sauce in your
chicken sandwiches the very next
time you make them and see if you
don’t agree there’s a vast improve
ment.
Cream Cheese Sandwiches.
1 green pepper (chopped fine)
3 ounces cream cheese
Vs cup walnut meats (cut fine)
% teaspoon lemon juice
Dash of Worcestershire sauce
Salt and pepper
Remove seeds from green pepper
and chop fine. Add cheese, walnut
meats and lemon juice. Cream well
together. Add a dash of Worcester
shire sauce and salt and pepper to
taste. Spread between slices of thiiv
ly sliced white bread.
Maids of Honor.
(Serves 12)
1 recipe of plain pastry
M cup sugar
% cup almonds (ground)
2 egg yolks
2 tablespoons heavy cream
1 tablespoon flour
% teaspoon almond extract
Line 12 very small tea cake tins or
muffin tins with the pastry. Com
bine remaining ingredients in order
given and fill pastry shells with this
mixture. Bake in a hot oven (425
degrees) for 10 minutes, then re
duce temperature to 350 degrees and
bake for 20 minutes longer. Cool,
and remove from the pans.
Butterfly Tea Cakes.
(Makes 8-10 tea cakes)
1 cup cake flour
1 cup sugar
1 teaspoon baking powder
V* teaspoon salt
1 egg
Vi cup coffee cream
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
Vi pint whipping cream
Mix and sift all dry ingredients.
Place unbeaten egg and coffee
cream in a bowl
and beat thor
oughly. Add va
nilla extract and
pour liquid ingre
dients into the
dry ingredients
and beat until
smooth. Bake in well-greased cup
cake or muffin tins in a moderately
hot oven (375 degrees) for 30-35 min
utes. Cool. Then cut tops from
cakes, and cut each top in half.
Scoop a spoonful of cake from each
one. Whip the cream and fill cavity
with whipped cream. Arrange top?
to form butterfly and serve at one*
Date Nut Squares.
(Makes 3 dozen IVi-inch squares)
3 eggs
3 tablespoons water
1 cup sugar
1 cup flour
1 teaspoon baking powder
Vfe teaspoon salt
1 cup walnut meats (cut fine)
2 cups dates (cut fine)
Beat the eggs. Aid water and
gradually beat in the sugar. Sift
together the flour, baking powder
and salt and blend with the first mix
ture. Fold in the nuts and dates.
Spread in a shallow greased pan
(about 10 by 12 inches). Bake in
a moderately hot oven (375 degrees)
for about 20 minutes. Cool, cut in
squares and roll in confectioner’s
sugar.
Danish Vanilla Fingers.
(Makes about 5 dozen)
Vi cup shortening
V4 cup sugar
1 egg
1 teaspoon vanilla
2 cups flour
Vi teaspoon salt
Vi pound almonds (1 cup blanched
and ground fine)
Cream shortening and add sugar
gradually. Beat in the egg and va
nilla. Blend well.
Sift flour and salt
together, and add
to the first mix
ture. Stir in the
ground almonds.
Turn dough onto
a lightly floured
board and knead
until the mixture is smooth and no
longer clings to the hands. Cut off
small pieces of dough and shape in
rolls about 2V4 inches long and a scant
half inch thick. Place on greased
cookie sheet and bake in a moderate
oven (350 degrees) for about 15 min
utes.
Easy Entertaining.
Doesn’t ham loaf with hot cheese
biscuits sound inviting to you? It
is so simple you can plan and serve
the meal yourself, giving mother a
day off tc visit her friends or to do
that much-needed shopping that she
hasn’t had time to do before. The
menu and recipes for this delicious
ly simple and simply delicious lunch
are given in Eleanor Howe’s book,
“Easy Entertaining,” which you
may obtain by sending 10 cents, in
coin, to Eleanor Howe, 919 North
Michigan avenue, Chicago, Illinois.
(Released by Western Newspaper Union.)
Watch Chic Knitwear Go Tops’
In College Environs This Fall
By CHERIE NICHOLAS
triumphs anew for
campus, town and travel wear.
Sweaters especially have recaptured
the fancy of school-faring girls. Be
ing so versatile and so fetchingly
styled as they are, you wear casual
ly and nonchalantly sturdy sweat
ers with “catchy” detail for active
and spectator sports wear through
all the hours of the day. Then when
the shadows fall you come out radi
antly arrayed in a ravishing sweat
er that is “all dolled up” with glit
ter and color and touches of hand
embroidery (decollette neckline if
you so choose) that gives you a
bona fide "lady of fashion” look to
be envied. It is not to be wondered
at, is it, that “knitted” has become
a magic word in college circles?
And here’s something encouraging
we are telling you—you don’t have
to ‘ tend to your own knitting” as
in days of old if you do not want to,
for stores and shops are broadcast
ing the good news to the fashion
world that they are making a fea
ture of handknitted sweaters. What’s
more, you will be surprised to find
how reasonable they are. You can
get perfectly lovely types with all
the little “whimsies” and fetching
style accent^ that discriminating
taste demands.
So get the sweater habit, Miss Col
lege Girl, and take along with you
not one sweater but a collection for
a whole wardrobe of’em will be none
too many. A plaid skirt, a velveteen
skirt, a monotone tailored cloth with
a pleated skirt thrown in for good
measure, to which add one or more
utterly formal floor-length skirts and
you will be equipped for any demand
of the time, the place and the event.
We are showing a handknit eve
ning sweater in the lower left of the
group. It is in Ireland green with
big puff sleeves embroidered with
bright flowers.
A sweater that serves double duty
for the college girl is pictured in the
lower right. It is a golden wool-
knit and may be worn either wjth
a tweed skirt for daytime, or with
an evening skirt. Worn with it, and
considered very appropriate for the
college girl, are twisted gold chain
necklace and bracelet and an ob
long gold watch with link bracelet.
The cardigan and pullover set
shown above to the left promises
endless service to the campus-bound
collegiate. It has smocked shoul
ders (new styling feature) and is
in a flattering Araby rose tone, beau
tifully tropic knit to add softness. It
is worn with a kitten’s ear wool
skirt in beige.
Here’s something you really should
have if you are going away to
school. It is an ensemble of knit
and jersey as illustrated above to
the right. The short, boxy jacket
is machine knitted of wool chenille.
The hood is lined with the iden
tical striped material of the rayon
jersey dress. It is available in stun
ning new greens and wines and
brown tones and smart grays.
Yes, indeed, all signs point to a
“knitted season.”
(Released by Western Newspaper Union.)
Woolknit Suit
The ideal travel suit for air-con
ditioned trains is this woolknit cos
tume made of zephyr yarn. The
long torso jacket is double breasted
with high notched revers and bow-
knot pockets. The skirt is cleverly
gored for sleek hips and comforta
ble flare. Wear it with this new off-
the-face beret of navy felt trimmed
with a band and bow of pique to
match the white pique vestee. A
silver lapel flower and silver leaf
earrings, navy calf bag and white
gloves complete this smart outfit.
If you are a black-and-white enthu
siast you will love this woolknit suit
in black with white accessories.
Dramatic Felt Hats
Have Large Brims
Your hat must look important this
season. The new dashing wide-
brimmed felts do just that.
There is no limit to how non
chalantly the brims turn up in dra
matic ways. The brim that dashes
high at one side gives you the new
profile hat which is a leading fash
ion this season.
To show your pompadour off,
many felts flare abruptly off the
forehead and to emphasize the
movement these hats are worn far
back on the head.
Soft brims that can be manipu
lated characterize the newer felts,
and to add to their flattery hand
some black lace veils are adjusted
most spectacularly.
Concentrate Skirt
Fullness in Front
Interest focuses on skirts this sea
son. The fact that the new silhou
ette is slimmer does not mean all
fullness is abolished. The basic
thought in achieving slimness is to
keep the sides flat and the very
newest treatment is to concentrate
fullness directly in front.
Then too the new to-one-side fas
tenings make for slenderizing lines,
and designers handle the drapes al
ways with an eye to achieve slinv
ness.
Daytime Dresses Feature
Jet Embroidery, Nailheads
Daytime dresses take on gleam
and glitter. Black dresses especial
ly are enhanced with elaborate nail-
head treatments.
Jet on black is interpreted in
many ways. It may be embroid
ered on or pockets of jet may be
applied and if you are jewelry-mind
ed wear jet necklace and bracelet.
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DEPARTMENT
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HOUSEHOLD
QUESTIONS
To preserve the color of green
vegetables cook them uncovered.
• • •
A teaspoon of honey dropped
into the heart of a cored apple
when preparing apples for baking
gives them a delicious flavor.
• • •
Bake apples with only a small
amount of sugar so that the char
acteristic flavor is not disturbed.
. • •
When preparing gelatin desserts,
if left-over fruit juice is used in
stead of water, the desserts will
be much richer.
• • •
The flavor of apple pie is greatly
Improved by sprinkling a little
lemon juice over the layers of
sliced apples as they are placed in
the pan.
• • •
To remove a slight iron scorch
mark from white clothes rub the
scorched area lightly with perox
ide. Then rinse it thoroughly in
cold water. Peroxide removes the
color from colored clothes, how
ever.
• • •
Punches and fruit beverages im
prove upon standing. Place them
in covered jars and store them in
the refrigerator for at least. 24
hours. A tart beverage is also
more refreshing than a thick sir-
upy one.
• • •
Ammonia and water in equal
proportions will remove varnish
from furniture.
SIMPLE
NEURALGIA
n Fast-working, pow
erful because ex
tra-medicated. Rub
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Source of Ignorance
The fowl of ignorance lays the
egg of pride.
WNU—7
37—40
A Poor Seat
Self-conceit is a poor seat to sit
on.
A
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