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WaRP4ve uuinwIng-rds. In the time of the Montcsumas,hum ming-birds were tamed and kept in large conservatories. Doctor Zipper lien, o1 Olnlunati, tells of two lua uing-birds which strayed in May,~a year ago, Into the house of a lady in that city and were captured: The lady, a friend of birds, resolved to try the experiment of domesticating the little creatures, although sliewas aware that such attempts ended usually in the death of the blids. dho had no suitable cage so she. seleoted a large candy Jar, and fixed a perch inslde. In the bottom she placed a bouquet ol dowerf, and covered -the open end with gauze. The flowers were renewed every day. The convolvulus, trolj i, lum, honeysuckle, and other flowers with a long calyx were selected. A little honey was dropped into every blossom. The birds began to sip the sweet food on the first day, humming above the lower caps, darting their tongues In and out among them swift as light. ning. They also snapped at little in sects and devoured then. After some weeks they were given some honey thinned with water, in a small dIsh. They sat upon their low perch and lapped the honey with their tonges, like a dog drinking water. In a short time tire birds were 8o tame that tho gauze that confined them was removed, and they flow about the 'lom while their glass palace was cleaned and furnished with fresh flowers and honey; but as soon as this operationt was finished they flew Into the glass agatin, and began eating the honey. If the lady took a nap after dinner, thep perched themselves upon her lorehead, and enjoyed their slosta there. They hummed about, the roon for hours, Iaulting for rest upon the flinger of their friend, and dressiag their feathers. For a change, tlhe) would fly again to the honey, but, after a i'mentary taste away they would go, lying about their friend. Towards evenlug they sougtht their perch In the glass 1 alace, and sang quick ila ti no.es In the fluest planissho. They ocea sionally snapped at siialL Ineec.s, but their chief food was honey, and later strong sugar-water, since tie honey thinted with water often settled to the bottom of the dish. They thrived line ly on the sugar-water, too. As the weather became warm in Junie, the gauze covering was entirely removed from their glass palace and the little creatures were given the range of the whole room, but their food waii at vays placed in their old dwelling. Tihe ti::y birds were not at all timor ous, even at first; they did not fluttr about anxiously when their flowerb were removed and fresh ones brought. Their eyes said plainly: "We know you are gocd to us." They thankfully appreciated the care of their proLector, and, although they manifested no un easiness when straungers were In the room, they could not bo luduced to perch upon anybody's lingor but that of their tender keeper. At the end of September one of thoem began to bu alling, amtd a Ic w day n.Itr was foundl dead upon the door. The other pined from hour to hour, and when the cooler ntights at theo end of October approaced it too succutmbedl to the unfrienzdly climate and to its plainly mianiifested homesiekno.is, A Que11er I'reaierlpiton. On one occasion, when 1 was Ill, the General calle~d Dr. flunt, his family physiclan. Th'le doctor was a tail, lank. ugly man-'"as good as gold,'' but none of the graces that are supposed to win young ladies; y'et he was mnarriedl to one of of the loveliest youing creatutres 1 ever knew. General Jackson accomn. pantied him to my room, and after my p~ulse had been duly' felt and my tOngue duliy inspcted, they drew their chairs to0 the tire and began to talk. "Ilunt,"' suiddeinly exclaimed the I'residlent, "'how caine you to get such Itell you," repilied the doctor, "I wasi alledto atnd att young lad atl the were bad, shu htad to keep them band a god. I cured her wvithout her ever havirng a (distinct vlow of me. She leftt the institute, and a yeiar afterward she appeared hero in society, a belle and a beauty. At the ball I lntroduced my self, wvithoumt the slightest ulterior de signt, as the- physician whio Ihad re stored her sight, although I supposed she had never real ly seen mnc. She instantly exp~ressed the most heartfelt gratitudo. It seetmedl( so deepil anmd genuine that 1 was touched. TIhat very evening she informed me she hadl a severe co1(d, and that I must again prescribe for her. Well l it don't look reasonable, but, I did it. I wrote my name on a bit of paper, folded it and handed it, to her, telling hor she must, take that presoription. She read It and laughed, "'tis a bitter pill,'' she said. But whether it was bitter or not we wer0r marrIed. Thae ISI8ack Guardsa. Some years ago, the "hlarrisburg Guar ds,"';a popular volutnteer comn pany' changed their niame to tihe '"Cameron G uardsb' and Hi mon Cameron gave themn ive hundred dollars. Jack Ogle, a brilliant young fellow,- afterwards an Mi. C., a friend anzd relative o1 Judge Black, was cMatn of the Sem erset G uards, a gay voliuntee~r company at Judge Bliack's home. Hearing of Cameron's (dont lon the captaint callen onl Judge Black and i nslstedupo a1)11i similar gift to his company, to which the Judge assented without bneaihaton upon the same condition as to change) ofname. 'Cortainily," said the cap tain, "'we expect nothing elso.'' "T'hen it, s settled,'' said the Judge, "'bnt Jack, think how the new name will sound. May it not be possible that some of your muon will dislike to be called "the lilack GJuarda." The cap tain saw it in an Iistant and sid he would not bear such a nmamne for any i monem, AGRICULTU.NE. Tus VALUE OF 113X MANUnI.--ShOlid all the droppings from the roosts by tiens be carolully saved in barrels, and every spring and fall this manure be composted with any good soll or muok from swamps, and kept a few moiths -its Value for any crop would be equal to Peruvian gueno, and might,I think be estimated ilt fifty cents per fowl per annum. From dty hens I saved abot0 ten bariels.of the pure hen-gua no during the year. What I save from November to April I compost In the spring with soil. First, . spread sol In a circle to the depth of tiree or four inohes; then I spread the manure about an inch deep; then I spread an other layer of soil, till the heap is completed, using about four times the bulk of soil that I do of manure, the last layer being soil. The top of this compost heap I make flat to catch the rains; then I cover with any refuse or straw, then place some sticks of wood or boards against the covering to keep it in place, and In two or three months it is ready for use, having become tiho roughly incorporated wittl the soll,but as tihe seuson lor planting Is then near ly past, I leave ihe heap till the next scasou, when I use it with what I com post in November. Ierhaps it would be better to make a compost in Alarch, where the climate will admit, and use the manure for crops planted the last of Alay or early J uLne; but I cau discov er no loss by keeping it till the next season. A gill l this compost in a hill of corn win be cqual in ellects to halt a shovelful of inanure. FRUTmLIZINa A LAnai FAAI.-W. J. Fowler writes truly In an exchango as follows: That the fertility of good land may be maintained by the itse of clover alone, is shown by the experl. once of hundreds of Western New York farmers, I know pieces of land that have never had manure. Alter nate wheat and clover ins been the ro tation over slce the o'iginal timber was cut off. The clover eail alternate year has been plowed under, and noth Ing but gypsum, at the rate Of one hundred poiinds per acre per year, has ever been appl.ed. This land I still in god coiiuitioin, not (uiLe equal to the filids near the barnyard, aUt which have had less clover but, nure inanure, but tolerably sureo 01 10 to 25 bushels of wheat per acre. The lack in such inld Is niore apt to be phosphatu of liite, anid a dressing of superpliasphiatu appihed with the Wheat aL Seettig will ulhelply and urely remiedy thiW. By u. nibining wiliter stock feeding with occatLlollial IIowilVig under 0i grienl Cluver for mantre. I do not klUubt that the fertility of large farms tuay sUly13' be kept Up US if the hnris were sialler. in anHy event wvhere clover is grown thre must always be tie rousts it the soil to decay, and this wili pre veit very rapid deterioration of fertil ity. So miuch always deplnds ' cn keep lug the oil0 ferille, that cowercial u1Iires which oni trial prove profit ablushould always be usCd. CUIrIVAm12O Tnn11 Pimsatatox.-The most Promising of all the larger of the wild I ruits is the common persImmon. in its na1tive state it gives much greater ptromiiise' of siltCriy 11.Y than the apple, peal, leacl, or orange. It Is, at least, ver'y Palatable, while tile others are not. The c;rcuistanice that this ffrit rit)Cis very late la the seaion, adul Is improved by the frost is In its favor. Theire Is no lack of early fruits of all kinds. But there Is a seatoity of late fruits. ihe pershimmon ranks among the most nutriclous fruits grown In any portIon cif this world. It Ia casIly pawurved by disy~ 1IJ s0 enuiniig. l)ill'rent trees produce fruit greatly varyinig in shape, sIze, and inavor. In issouiri a variety has been discovered that is destitute of seeds. The astring. ciit quality whilen characterizes th.s fruit is imuchi stronger in some speol men0s1 thanu ini others. Tile tree hasi a flne alpearance, is hardy, and rarely falls to produce a large crop of f ruit. It, only requIres thle same11 cultivation that,. the appleui, peari anmd peach have received to render of' equal v'alue to thenm. Th'fe few peCrsin 111ons that fInd their way to this market always coi-. mnand good picesV0. Cor'ern wire and copper straps are often very conlvenient anid 01 much use1 in repairin~g tools, doors, grates and parts of buildings. Copper wire is about as easily handled as twinie and is more u nyloldinig and durable. Its ilexibilty gives It great advanitage over iron wiire, and it does not rust, Coppei straips for nauiling are better thani leather on one hanid and1 hoop ironi on the oilier. Copper tacks are good for mending olid harness, as they ar1e easily cilnehied. T.lo keep seeds from the dlepredlatlons of mice ix iiome pIeces 01 ciamiphor wivith thiem.. Camphor placed lai trlulnks or dIrawors will prevent mice from do lug themi in jur.. A Wultyj Auottoneer. Some0 interesting reiniscencees of John Keese, a witty New York auction eer, are published. A narrative of the baittle of* Waterloo is put up. "hlow munch for it?'' Twenty-live cents w'ias gd. "There wvas no0 quarter at the battle of Waterloo, my (dear sir." Sell ing a copy of some "Account of the Centaurs," It was objected there couldn't be anaecount 01 whlat never existed. Keese gave an Instance 0f a centauir-thie headl of John the JBaptist coiming in on a charger, lie said Cadmus was the first postboy, because "lie brotugh letters from Phon~Ioia Into Greece." lie knocked down "Dayley's Deal I Doings'' to a deeiayed apothic~ eary'," anid took the mioniey, saying "'smallI fevers thaniikfuilly received."' Selling a volume ".Concerinig the ap parel of MInisters" 'hle sa id lie sup posed It ref erred to their ''suriphus or namenlts.'' lie said the poems of the R1ev. Mr. Logani wore tile "Banks iind Brates of Bonnie Doon ''-at least the brays, lie likened a ledger to Ausria beenulhse' it wals backed and cornereud by Rhuissia'' and1 wheni it was1 knockedl down to Mar. Owen Phalen, lie objected to selling to a man who was always Owen and Phialen. lie mold a~ table to a man whoi( didnim't come for it; lie told aniother who wanited to buy it at prl vato sale, that the first. ltrchaser was lie moi(st uni-coml-ior-iable mamn lie ever knewv. ie said of a cop)y of LamDzn wIth biniding homt, that somnebody had "fleeceed it," but told ine buyer hec could eaily recover it. Ile putt lip a backgammion board whieh was to be sold on the square, and as perfect as a cop)y of Milton, beause, thierei were a pair-o'-dlce lost, ie samid the "Three Eras of a Woman's Life" was the story of the most woinde'rful womian that ever lived-only three errors, and when lie got 0on1y ten cents for the book DOMESTIC. DANGHnOUS LIQUIDs.-AmmonIa,es. pecially the stronger kinds, Is ver dangerous, few drops being enough tc Injure a person. When used for clean sing purposes it should be handled wit1 great care that the gas, which lsgive off freely in a warm room, be no breathed in large quantities, and di injury to the Idelicate inlug 'ot th< nose and mouth.. Botdine is a ,lqluid in the handling of ,011011 muqI cautiol should be exercised. It is very volatile and its vaporas w6li as the liquli itself, tnilammable. When employod for yemoving grease or other stali from clothing, gloves, etc., It shoticl never be used at night, nor at an: other time near a fire. Ether Is an other dangerous liquid, and in othe than the physieiau'. hands it had bee uot be employed in the household Alcohol must. also be used with grea care, especially at night. Cnys'rALEzi 1CLOWEs.-Construel baskets of fancy form with pliable con, per wire, and wrap them wIth gauze into tiese tie to the bottom violets ferns, geranium leaves-lu fact an lowers except full blown roses-anq sink them In a solution of alum, on pound to a gallon of water, after thi solution is cooled. The colors will thei be preserved in their original beauty and the crystalized alum will holi faster than when from a hot solution When you have a light covering o crystals that completely cover. the ar ticles, removo the basket carefuly ,an allow to drip for twelve hours. Thesi baskets make a'beautiful parlor orna ment, and for a long time preserve thi fiashness of the flowers. IcE FOR TEE'TING CHILDiiEN.-Thi pain of teething may be alnot don away with, and the health of the chik be1teltted, by giving itsplinters of ice pliked off with a pin, to melt in it mouth. The fragment is so small tha it is but a Orop of warm water befor It can be swallowed, and the child ha all the coolues for its feverish gum without the salgiest. Injury. Th avhlity with which 1b " tie thing last the coollug morsel i h instant jule which kavueeds hours of fretfuines and the sleep whie follows are th bust witniesses to this maio remedy lee muy be fed to a three innth's chilt this way, each spiluter being no large Anii at comiloin pin, for live or et Isinutes, the result being that it ha swaullowed In that tne a teaspooifu nf warm water,vhilch,so far from bei .1 a hari, is good for it, and the process may be repeated hourly as oftenas ti 'rUting its from teetliag begin. FoOLED INTO FATNESS.-1n Ital) wealthy connoisseurs are very fond o lat ortolans, and this is the device b' which they obtain them: They shu the birds up inl a dark chattaber (know lug that inl their natural st'tte it I their habit to fNed at sunrise.) The then arrange artificial lights, whili cani be cast at will into the dark prisoi of the birds, on seeing which the orto lans immediately seek the food whic Is provided for thema ; the light i wit hdrawn aid they go to sleep; afie a few hours it is again introdueed, an\ so the process is repeated live or sii tines in the twenty-four hours, so tha the birds are kept constantly feed in or sleeping; the constquenco Is tha ;n about three days the ortolan be. Lici3oms it 'delicious ball of fat,'aind read, for the table. IP-SArvE.-An elegant lip salv, may be made in the foilowvini slhnpi runiner : Put half' a p)ounid of fresl L.ard into apani i it. an tvumjU anld, haltf of whIte wvax; set on a slow, fira till1 it is meoltedl ; then take a small tl dlish, Illi It with water, and adtd a fey chips of alkaniet root; let tthe wate boil till it becomes of a beautiful reo color; strain some of It, and mix I with the other Ingredients accordini as maly be desired ; scent It with somi lagreeable and~ favorite extract, an< theni piour Into small wvhite jars o boxes. ArLtS BATTER PUVDDING.-FOur beat en egge, and pint of rich milk, tw eup s of' lour, one teaspoonful or sall two even teaspoonfuls of baking pow dier. P'eel anmd cor~e eight ripe tart ap p)es ; put into it deep baking-dish ; il the ceniter of each with sugar and pou the beateni batter over them. Bake ai hour and eat wvith cream and sugar flavored with nutmeg or lemon. A D)mLcious WAY OF? CooKING. Is mnrr.-Take a nice fresh raht,cut i iuto jolints, and fry it brown,wih somi slices of pickled pork,add somitonions shred flue. When nice and brown,tak It out of the frying pain, and put it in stew-pan, with water sufllclent t cover it. Poeppdf and ealt to taste th icken with some flour and butter ; ad orce-meat balls, but be suro not to pu the iat out of the fryIng-pan. Let, th gravy be the thickness of rich creaml A GOOD wvay t~o keep cut flowers freal Is to lay them in wvet- clothes. TIak them out of theovises at night.,sprinkl with cold water, and wrap thema witil cloth made very wet.. The weight c thme cloth will inot crusliu the most (teli ente flowers, wthile It keeps ouit, thle ali anmd prevents their falling~ to pieces o opening further. MocK MzxcE-l'u. - Four Bostol crackers rolled, two- tirlds of a cupfu of cold wvateor, a cupful of mnolasses half a cuplful each o1f sugar and vine gar, an egg, and raisins iand spIces ia for mince-pies. Ors rut PIE.-Make a paste as for pl1 erust, line a bhalow pan witit It,' pt' in a 1ayer of oysters. seasoni witl crumba of butter anid sailt. add a laye of bread or cracker crumbs, and so on then add the liquor aind a little milk cover with crust anid bake. Fona damp closet or cuIpboard.whie: is liabe to cause milldew, plaice in it saucerful of quick-lime, and it will n( oni hy absorb eli apparent, daanpness,'u sweeten anid disintleet the place. It ne w the lime oiiee a fortnighL, or a elton as it becomes slaked. TH'llsE who object to tea leaves fe swveeping time cam pets caln use fresl cuit grass instead. 1t answvers the sarim pulrpose for preventing dust, and give theo carpet a fresh, b~righlt look. Ii' yout want goodh stch, mix it wit cold wvater; addi boiling waiter unt I thuickenis, thon add. a di.9ert-spoonht of augar and a piece of butter. Tal umakes a stiff and glossy finleh equal I that of the laundry. To remove grease from wail papel lay several folds of blotting paper o1 thme spot, and hold a hot iron near unti the grease is absorbed. 1IOUOEKEEPRs may be glad to kno that a tablespoonful of ammonia in or gallon of w'arm watei will restore Lii color of carpets. A SPOONFUL of stewed tomatoes I the gravy oh either roasted or f rio mats is an advantge. HUMOROUV, - A LADY of his flock once called upon r I . Gill with a grievance. The Doe tor's neckbande were too long for her lWa of ministerial humility, and after k 4ong harangue on the sin of pride, Ss intimated that she had brought her t sos*orswllh her an() would bepleastd if her dear pastor. would allow her to o el p them dow n to her notion of pro plety. The doctor not only listened k pitently to her lecture, but handed Sher over the offending ' white bands I fo: her to operate upon. When she hal out them to her satisfaction and re tu'ned the bibs it was the doctor's turn. I "low "said he, "my good sister, you r est 4to me a good turn also." "Yes, - it *111, Doctor; what can it be?" r " ell, you have something about you witch is a deal too long and causes me noend of trouble, and I should like to L see it shorter." **indetd, dear sir, I wi. not hesitate; what is It? Here are the soissors, use them as you please." "Come, then," said the sturdy divine, - "g3od sister, put out your tongue." l AM a peaceoble man," said the in r trtdor, grasping his club with I both hands, ' but If you don't come 3 dovn with $17 50 damages for my lao. 3 ersted feelings the bombardment will i begin at once." The owndr of the dg pall down the money as lie was afraid I the other fellow might exasperate him if to hit him with a club of that size. f The owner of the aog also said that he - was sorry the dog had bitten the in I truler's son. "Why, he ain't my 3 Bon." said the intruder. "Whose son - is te, then?" asked the astonished 3 owner of the dog. "le Is the son of a friend of mine who owed me $17 53, but lie Is poor, and the only available 3 assets he has was these dog bites on 3 his body. which he turned over to me I for collectloi." "Well, I'll be blowe." 4"Oh, you needn't complaIn; you are S gettog off dog cheap. 1 ought to make t you pay in advance for the next time 3 that boy Is going to be bit." GLOOMILY the merchant sat looking over the books and thrqugh the few 3 remaining papers in the same, the mnoining after the junior partner had got away to South America with alac rity and $42,000 of the firm's money. A -o:sollug triend says tothe merchant: "Ali, well, you'll work out all right. There's no great loss without some gain." "True," sighed the man of trade, with a bright light dawuing in bli fice, "true, my wife went with him." 11 x opened the door cautiously, and poking his head In, in a suggestive sort of way, as If there was more to follow, inquired, '1. this the rlnktum?' r "The what, my friand?" "Is tids the rinktun-sinktum--manotuui, or some such place, where the editors live?" "This is the editorial room, yes, Air, Come in." "No; I guei:s 1 won't come in. I wante( to see what a rinktum was like, that's all. Looks like our garret, only w use. Good day." Nor long since two men entered a Galveston lawyer's office to have a deed for a city lot drawn up. The man who wis conveyer of the lot is an under taker. L "How much consideration shall I r put in the deed ?" asked tihe lawer. L "Choost put inl for love and affeclon. I gives him de lot pecause lie buried r my inudder in law for me." The lot is worth at least $1,000. This Isa, case for the grand jury to investi a gate. A scruTIrmO journal explains "How i t~o travol Ilk. iugbunn." One way ia s to attempt to cross a fild In which a i mad buli is pasturing, but the solenti rtil paper, curiously enough doean'c r allude to this method. When a man 1 comes suddenly upon a ranmpageous t bull, lie travels like thunder and light E ning. I A OIat In Loiidoni struck her croquet r partner on the head with a mallet; brain fever set in, and the young man necarly died. ThIs is probably the first - case of the kind on record, as not one young man in a thousand who liays ,croquet in London, posseusse enough - material for the brain fever to grab hold of. r "31a. SMrra, you said you once of 1 ficlated in the pulpit. Did you moan ,by that you preuched?" "No, sir; I held the light to the man that did prepch." Ah ! the court understood i you differently. It supposed that thie L discourse came diroctly from you." a "No, sir; 1 only threw light upon it." Li THAT was! a triumphal appeal of the lover of anatiqu.Ity,who, in arguing the ) super lority of (bid architecture over the ;ne,v, said : "Where will you find any .1 modern building that has lasted so t long as the ancient?" .THE bost temperance lecturers are those who have been through the miii -the gin mill. Thousands of men and women are at this moment preparing themiselv estior good temperance lee turers. THEn erab is a very soclable fish. II -onei shakes hands with the too of a rbather, it always wants to come out of r the water with him and have a time. I'r is said we spend more for tobacco than for breadl. This seems. a littlE hard to believe, when every one seems to deopend on his friends for the -farmer. Trho E.arl of Beaoonsflid can now wit' 'ng repeat the old political i rebi -ly attributed to him, "i - shou. hirst4if I oquld throw my~ scconci whole." SA JOKR says that wheu he goes into a saloon, andl tells the barkeeper- to "set 'em uip" for the crowvd, it aiwayc brings up a lot of old rum-an'-nuis 'I NavER does a man beliove so strong. a ly ini the attraution of g.ravitation ai 'when lie sit, down on a chair and findi a IC gone. hlAxY preachers seek to impresi their hearers with the faot that life is short, but forget It in their sermons. a MaNY a girl takes no stock In hiei suitor's protestations of love, but aim. iply takes him for what lie is worth, t Is tihere a word in the English lang i1 uage that contatus all the vowels a Tihere is, unqiestiouiihly. 0 A MAN with a heart can never refuse the kiss of a child. And a mnan with 5 out a heart never gets a chance to re ( use. LAxOUAGou of the flowers-"Thls in a late spril)g ,anyhow. We shall freeze V to death be fore we half begin." e Rizcans take wings, and the man wh< bought on a mortgage says he has seer a house-fly. ci The white men didn't have a ooloro: A! bomething aboUt Soldering.-Milk pane, pails, and many other tin household utensils, will get leaky and need re patring. B its of rag and splinlers of wo'od, eto., give temporary amendment in certain cases; but the only perma. nent method is tW use solder. A solder ing "kit" co-isists of a ,soldering iron of copper weighing about 1 ounces; a fiat 10 inch file, rather course; a scrap er, and a 8 square file, ground to three scraping edges for an inch from the point. A bottle of soldering fluid will also be required, and a little rosin and some sal-anmmoniac. Last.and not least a few sticks of solder. Directions for soldering:' The' "Iron" must first be tinned, that is, 'sovered with a thin coat of solder. fo do this, heat the Iron somewhat a'bove the melting point of solder. File one side of the beveled portion smooth and touch it immedi ately with rosin and soldering fluid, and then with solder, and wipe "mooth with a rag. File and "tin" the remain ing portion. When done, the surface should be completely covered with soldor. Another way Is to heat the iron nearly to redness, and rub It upon the sal-ammoniao with solder in con. tact, when on filling will be necessary. This tinning must be repeated when ever the thin coating of solder is re moved by over heating of the iron, which is quite likely to occur. Now to the work. - Where ever It is desired to attach solder, the parts must be clean. If the surface Is not already bright and clean-, it must be made so by appropriate means. Here the scraper will generally be of use. Having scraped the surface apply with a stick some of the soldering fluid, or, Instead of the soideoing fluid, some rosin, to the parts to be soldered. Meanwhile the Iron has been heating In the cook. stove; not too hot, for thou the solder is too fluid and you cannot pick up a portion with the point of the iron. Vake the iron from the tire, wipe with a rag, or dip momentarily into a weak solution of sal-ammoniau. Touch the iron to the solder; it the heat is right, a small portion adheres, and is placed upon the spot where It will do the most good, The tendency to use too much solder should be guarded against, if the iron Is not hoc enough, warm it some more. A Losing Joke. A prominent physilan of Pittsburg said jokingly to a lady. patient who was complaining of her continued ill health. and of his inability to cure her, "try Hop Bitters I" The lady took ii In earnest and used the Bitters, . from, which she obtained permanent health. She now laughs at the doctor for hh Joke, but lie is not so well pleased with it, as It cost him a good patient,-ilar rieburg Patriot. It is well known that if a long dry tube open at both ends, be held over a Jet of burning hydrogen, a musical sound is produced, the pitch and qual ity of which vary with the length, thickness and diameter of the tube. It has been proposed to adopt such a tube to the safety lamp used in mines, pla cing it near a telephone in comnunzica tion with another telephone In the manager's office. Tho alteration o1 the sound, duo to a greater or less admix ture of gas with the air of the mine, would warn the manager of the state of the-atmosp here in the workings. "VEOETINE," says a Boston phives clan, "has no equal as a blood puiIler. Hearing of its many wonderful cures, after all other remedies had failed, I visIted the laboratory and convincel myself of its genuine merit. It is pre pared from barks, roots, and herbs, each of which ia highly elfectjlve, and they are compounded in such a~manner as to prodluce astonishing results." It should be widely known, because of evi..ent Importance, that at the in, ternatlonal geologloal congress to be held at Bologna, in 1881, a prize will be awarded of 5,000fr for the best in.. ternational scale or colors and conven tional signs for graphic representation of formation on geological maps and sections. Many of our geologists might go in for this prize, not for its money value, bi't for the sake of making a certain department 01 geology inteill gible when presented to the e'ye. TIhe Babel of coloring in geology at present here and in other countrIes is enough to cause a dispersion of those that come to learn, and depart In disgust wvhen they find that a very important means of conveying knowledge is In itself confietory. Advertising Cheats. - It has become so common to write the beginning of an elegant, interest ing article and then run it into some advertisement that we avoid all such cheats anid simply call attention to the merIts of Hop Bitters in as plain honest terrns as possible, to Induce people to give th m one trial, as no one who knows Their value will ever use any thing else .-Provdenoe Advertier. The adulteration or tea Is carried on to a surprising extent. M. liussen, an enminent French chemist, has investiga ted the subject and made a report to the Paris Academy of Sciences, lie finds that a great variety of substances arc used as adulterants, such as Prus sian blue, indigo, gy psum, chromate of' lead, arseniate 01 copper, sulphate of iron, stearite, carbonate of lime, car bonate o1 magnesia, plutnbage and kaolin. The Chinese often mix wvith tea the leaves and flowers of other, plants. ______ TroUsANDs upon thousands of bottles of Carbolne, a deodorized extract o( petroleum, have been sold, and from all over the land comes one universal Ory, "Carboline, as now improved andl perfected, is the best hair restorer ever used," Sold by all druggists. A sweet, syrup-like liquid exudes from the bodies of plant-lice (Aphidee) ,which feed upon the younger porious 'of trees. This "honey-dew," as it is called, is frequently so abundant. as to cover the ground~ beneath, and in many places is usually spoken of as "oil from the trees." Bees gather the sweet. exudation for the purpose of making it into honey, and ants are also fond of it. Card collectors please buy seven bars Dobblns' Electric Soap of any grocer and write Cragin & Co., P'hil adelphia Pa., for seven cards gratis, six colors and gold Shakespearo's "seven Ages of Man,' Ordinary price 2 cents. At Ratkr England,there hase been dis covered, about thirty feet below the present surface of the earth, a perfect Rloman bath, oightly feet long and forty feet wide, the whole of the inte rior being lined with lead three-fourths of an inchI in thickness. . Wg need not be physicians to know when we have and how to cure a Cold. We can have a special physician always near', by keeping convenient a bottle of Dr. Dull's Cough Syrup. PriQe 25 na a TavaAnse inconvenienced In car.. rying bimmons' Liver Regulator in bottles- for fear of breaking, are In. formed that the powder Regulator will be found an unexceptionably good aperlent, by pouring half of a tea cupful of ordinary drinking water upon a teaspoonful of the powder and drinking the mixture; or, a teaspoon ful of the powder taken into the mouth, chewed anl swallowed, will produce .he same effect. That effect Is well known to fully a million of our people, who find the Regulator Invaluable as a gentle Cathartle. -A certain cure for Headache, Indigestion. Feverish and Billouis 6ymptoms, Costiveness. Colic, Sick and Sour Stomach, Low Spirlts, and like evils of a disordered Liver and Stomunch. See that you get tile gentlile, prepared by J. U. Zellin Co. One Box or Six aottles. If you are suffering from a combination of Liver or Kidney diseases, and oonutipation, do not fail to try tito celebrated Kidney-Wort. It is a dry compit)ond, as oasily prepared as a cup of cofftm.- 4(Ivance. THE GREAT REPUTATIOlP Whion Vogetine has attained in all parts of tU country as a GIEAT AND UOUD MEDICINE, and the large number of testimonials which are constantly being received from per one who have been cured by its use, are conclusilvo proof of it- great value. It is recommended by phy siolans and apothecarles. As a illood-Purlider and liealth-lHes orer it has no e-qual. Vegetno is not prepared tor a fanoy drink, mad, arom poor liquors, wilch debilitates tihe system and tends to dos.roy health instead of sostoring At. Are nat the many testimonials given for the ditfor. Ut iomplaints satisfactory to any reason iMle per: ons suffering trom disease that they ca lie cured? Read Ile different, testimonials given, and no o, can doubt. In mAny of these 01see tie persons say that their pain and sufur ing cannot be exp essed, as in cases of 8 :rofula where. apparently, the whole body was one ma-s of corruption. If Vegetine will relieve pain, el anso, purify and cure such dianasos, re storing the attent to porfect health after try. ing difforent physicians, many ro nodlem suffer Ilig ior years, as it not concluslve proof, if you ate a sufferei you can be cured ? Why Is this id eine periormin; such gromt cures? it wolI ksa In he blood. In the circulating flutd. it, can be iruly called the Groat Blued Puritier. Tuo grea source of d sense originates In to blood; and to medicLne that does not act di rectly up in it. to purity and renovate, h Is any Just clam upon pubi1c attention. When tit oliod b -comea I[eless and stugalant. either irnm change of weataier or climate, want of-ex ercise Irregular u14 or from any ath, r cau e, tihe VegeAtno will renew the blood, carry off the put,rid numors, cleanse tho stomach. regulat ihabo.vels, and impart, a tone of vigorto the whol body. The co viotIn lw, in the publ:c ts well its in the medical profess;on, t:iat th em-dies suppLod by the Vegetable Kuigaom are more saro, more successful in the care o1 dinease, thian inieral mnediclies. V,-gotine is composed of r. ots, barkis nd hrbs. It Is p easant, t- take and Is porfectly sati. A give an infant. ) you ued It? l not hsi:.' to try it. You wilt uiever regret it. Vegotine. An Exollent Medicine. bt'I'iNGFItNL, Oio, Fob. 28, Ism. This li to certily i hat _, have used Vegetine. manu.nt,ured by H. it. stevoas. Ioato , M as.. for Itheunatistm and General Prostration of the Nei vous system, with good success. I recoi. mend Vegetinu as an ecellont medline for such colplai .18. Your. very truly, 0. WV. VANDEGlFT. Mr. Vandegrift, of the firm of Vande rift & ilu-tnan. is a well-known busino a man i tale place, having one f the largest stores .U Springfield, i -. Vegetinae, PthPAIRED BY Z. E. sori V Ns, loT0N, Mas, Vegetiuo is Sold by All Druaggists. BB Bs i There ts no civilized nat-ion in the western Hemisphero in which the utillty of Heslettur's Bromach lil toe s aa tonto, corrective, and anti bilious medlcine, is not known and appreetated. While it Is a me(diotno for all seasons and all climates, 'r, is especial y suited to the comn plaints, gene rated liy the weather, being tht purest and best vegetable stimulant In the worn I. For sale by Druggists and Dealers, to wheto apply for loostetter'a Aimanae lor 1881. The Puarestand liost Miedliie over Made. Aeo hinathcan of Hop, u huMn+ drak and Dandoll with Mh an moato ura live prpt'of all ether Ditters, mnakes the groatest Blood Purifier,Lver R egu 0 and Life andl iealthiRestorn ongearth. No diseaeso o an possibly long exist whome fop lIttors are us ,so varied andi perfect are their operations. Theygi1vansow 1 feoavigertethosggfnifim T'o all whose e mnpioymeont,icauso irregulart ty ot thobowelson urInary organs, or who re outroan Apetie Tnto and mUd timulant, or orwhat your fo clings o r lymptomis are what the dilsease or all mnt, is nre Hop Dit tors, Don't waituntilyoun m aic't but if you only foot bad or milserabulo, tase thera at once. It may save your life.It, ha. sa ve d hundreda. *SO wilbe paifor a mo they will not cure or help. D)o not sufrer oiletyour frlenads suffor,but use and urge tlhem to usa Hop) B Remember, flop Df tters Is n vti, druggut erunsken ntiritm, but the Purest a tn d Dest Modl 3ine ever lmadlo the MIIVALJDS UIEND ndl hOPE" and no per~on Or family should be wIthout thetn. naetle.il cidof dgyas. 8eu fqr iar. hp btttens Ni.Coe htoci'oster,Y. and Toronto. Ont, &i Ctgo. i9ot tieae o4. n ma . Those ansewernig a ?avrtisenens : S he byska g that may sa 4e d. timeosyand nti surl renby lhe the o pae ha~gsuch an Imnann sale in~ anipat of the ooutw .4tpe to e disoesd oaea tintor a hsaolw. - S PERMANENTLY QuotEs KIDNEY DISEASES LIVER COMPLAINTS, Constipation and Piles. sw ~ ~ ton4 44, S.HOr . Vs "ito U~sm'am Val ams ekefs ST HAS I WONDERFUL POWER. Beonstt Aet ateW3, te 8OWSLW wa4 th MmeU3S at the = time. ecause It cleanses the systemn ot tesonous humors that evolofe Sdney and Urinary a , PIle., orin Rhumat sni uralia and nervous disorders. IDEsY.W*T Is &t y VreaebIe e. peadad e.he meat bywmali irpp" One package will makeeslx tqsof medlelse. Warsy It at tas Drufslm.. Puee. 02. WBLLS, 3IOAR8ON A CO., l'reterg, 12 (wnianapesd) swfae. Vt. Musical Christmas GIFTS I Most aceeptable gif ts to players or singers rill be tue following legant boundoW Ay one maled, post-froa, for the prige here lentioned. Robert Frans's Son' Album. Geas of Eaglish Mons. IRome CArele. Throe volumes. World of Mesag. Piano at lione. 4-hAnd collectioL Shower of 1earls. Vocal Duete. eame do Is Creme, 2 Vols. Operatic Pearls. Gems of Strauss. Gens of the Danes. Cluster of 0emnu. Sunshine of Song. aoh of the above in Cloth, $2.6- Fine G1, 13. Stttdent's Life in Hong. $1.50. Curiosities of Muate. $1.00. Beethoven. A Romance by Rau. St.6o. Rhymes & Tunen. Ohlisttnas Ofeg. t1.00. Sullivan's Vocal Album. $1.50. Fairy Fingers. For Piano. $1.0. OLIVER DITSON & 00., Boston. J. . DITMON, & CO., Inas Chestnut street, Pl]adIAeinhift. SAPONIFIER r. fte Old Roller.* (O0aaiatrsto Lye for FAXS Il OAF KAKN . Dirctiou mn y esaco or ase and Tolets oaps quims. h 1.1st weight and eitungth. ABK FOIl SAPONIFKril2 AND TAKE NO OTEEL rMN*A MA" MAAMW'r1 CO.. FPRE"' AGENTS WANTED fur tbe liudvonest au ES *r Furuimlied AX1tnt CrEAPEST BIBLaESnd Terui.t Larf4 E .cK CASH PREMIUMS. 63 PER DAY Mad. Bellins Our Novi Platform FAMILY BOALE. n"o orately ip to 23 lbs. it llefi *OQv$70 Other. a;nd I So -8 in 2 lbs. coar @S1O, A REGULAR BOOM FOR AOKNTR Excintvo terrtory given fro,. Teimu an I rapid unlem .sae prh'e ol4 Agent. DOlMESTIC SCALE C0. No. Ja7 W. Fitth St.. CinCnnati, 0. AGENTNI1 AGE TRI AGENThI1 JOSIAH &LLN'S WFE InEl'FAi' N EW 80 K " My Way wardPade. it b T8 e V ~r tr in eavery Town. Do' namut ory. Adidreit. V. I lLI i & "'0., Neawcrk, N J. 'S prtn 'lebra -n-Sn lre e ~~oad rhat to. of ost- a p d IobI *be l U n oa d rcat ike-. All kinds of sporlting lrnplenientem and arta JOS. C. GRUBBI & CO., 712 Market Street. Phila., Pa. S77 7 A YTEA R ano expenses to ag'ta. Outfit Fee. Address P. I VtOKKERY. Al'rmta. Mtaine. 311 an of rnea o 1roeDhilt R A vn. Nr0 ireniar to Alen Iamracy, SELGIN WATCHES I All t les Gold, Slver andi , ~"~TND~~h A1lror ta uet $0., ttsbrgh, Pa. TO I nd I 11 S-bm tuoatonluj, ,ldiam.n hod uraeo o.t bt'iaed. AI n la doe P rpertu ton, lndiana. yOUN 31 EN Leuro 1eioraphyl Ean $i to n oi. Addrme VLE4T1Nd NEO1S0., Jau~ms i o, LINDEMAN PIANOS. $1O5T ELEGANT AarD BEST AMANUFAOTUIIED, No,.92 Bleeker 8t,, New York. Send for Oatalogus. Trd -sal rtes e te ever y n~ee-Ie loe t wt limo.cm - 43Ysey 8.. N. 1 . P (O.1Bax1281. TIOUTT~BUSINESS h is hch n e d . 'sl~ap t ls nie rte , an d h o t e rf~ o l u l i a t o til r ~ toapa ol.beaiat~ PEACLASSES, Mroopoe, Therm',melers, lye Gses, Sp'ootacies, IU tomote, 0* OrsCally fedud Price. ii & J,. B E OK. 1toin Pbril SF dt A~N D PII.ES. on naturant pwfopee. it eose leethe symte of aoonntulabe anm poimuto au nueso oits olN.t