The Pee Dee herald. (Cheraw, S.C.) 1856-1859, December 16, 1856, Image 1
ti
"IDFA. IS A 8HAD0W
VOL. 1,
W. L. T. PRINCE. J. R.
PRINCE A HALLOY,
EDITOK3 AND PROPRIETOR
TEBXRI
tn PM D*t HtlUU> U puMUb.il irtry TombaT, at %
J??r ymt, wiuonT ur abtanc*.
ABTERTHEXERTtI
*0t MVww lloML or tew. which to a tquMv. will be tn>crU
kt <m. loll at tor . Bin*]. laMrUon; on. .ounre continue
wrtwoty * ?? nsaU tor Ih. flret, .ml fifty >*ob for
tlbMqueat lnwrUon. Ilwn.wkl or rtnin*. leant? en
tow iquu.
AdrwdwewnU laiwrtwl mouthl* or quarter! r ? '<4t{
<p*T eqaxre5 mm! monthly. ?*r?itr #' cwnt? per square.
Th. tollowlujc dwlo-tlon? will b? oivlc la fkror of 1U0 tltorvOMMOtl:
Om. PQUUA tor thiw* month a, %4 60
do tor tlx nortto, T AO
do Ibrui* ;<*r, 10 OO
Two ajouw, tor lb two month., T OO
do for dx (to 13 OO
do tor tnyni, 11 OO
TbiwNaiw,to three raoolue, 11 OO
do tor alx do 18 OO
do tor am* yeajs. Cft OO
Four aqueree, tor thra* month*. 14 OO
<10 ITT m 00 82 OO
foe on* y*ir. 88 OO
V VW xjuir* for on* jr**r, 40 OO
IniwtDiil tad bufla*** Ctrta, 8 OO S*r unum.
W Al! *dr?m.<*ttooU for l*u than tbru Konn 0A8I
Mkora mm b* run m monthly.
'f tub sonn of ie**rt*o*i* U not *p?*tft*d. IB >in?i
? i'*rtU<ro*oU wiu b* almost. tUl on*nr?il oat, on
YJAiarD AOCOBMSM.T.
Nn *dTortt?MB?nt*, Biriw nuu, wIU b* con?kUr?
IM TO A* % *qu*m
ifliscdlatteous.
COUSIN* BEN, OB THE GOOD DEE!
REWARDED.
?' Visitors !" exclaimed Rate Benuet
impatiently, aa she laid aside the book ah
bad bson reading, and in which she ha
been deeply interested, and took the card
which the servant presented.
?? Dear me, how provoking ! Jast as
am in the most exciting part of the stor
?and that pert, disagreeable Emily Arch
?r, too," she added, reading oro of th
cards ; who else I wonder T"
Waa there magic in (hat simple bit c
pasteboard, inscribed with onlv two w.?rdt
K|,Riohard Warren !" It would -il'inw
seem Ss,. instane<?oa di<l her < '?.>. ton-mc
change. The fn wn th.it d ? j he
boaatiful brow di*tpp<-;tr<jd, ?. y.
led, and. without auothoi ! v.?:V ,-,f t
book, she hastily svsuiei h<.': ?? ' bv
? - ? -Hiinewet the mtrrnr; ?n?*t wse on
exceptionable, and left the ? . r
Aa she entered the drawing r iru. a a
greeted her guest* with all tbHt grace an
elegance of uiantur for v*hi<d> bhe
distinguished, Emily Arclu r furveyed he
with one rapid, critical glance ; but drsai
aa well as manner, was fuultieu.
* It must be oord'esved that Kate lien
net enters a room like n Queen," .-h
thought, with a pang of envy and jcalou j
AS in Richard Warren's face she read un
disguised admiration of the lovely girl b<
fore him.
What casual observer, who had marke
d'h A maalinM AP k nan twn la ? ?WAI?I
??w uiitvvin^ v? in v muiro nuiti
dreamed that, under all outward friend
linens, each held the othor with h<
whole heart? Yet coil wok Kate an
Kail} were rival bailee, and their clain
to admiration were ao equally hallance
that it sequirod oo little exertion on eithc
aide to gain the aaooodanoy and be act
nowlcdged the victor.
If Kato, with ber classical featun
queenly dignity, elegant figure, and ei
qumite taate, at first sight threw her rivi
in the shade, Ltutly a piquant style an
. sprightly conversation were by iaa?iy pr<
ferred to Kate's statuesque beauty. It wi
|* impossible to dedicate which was the l<?v<
liai aaah had bar adherents and oduiii
-am?-bat at they were equally aa ncAm
U aeeiaed probable that the eenej * .
draw to a close without tiie ?ti .
decision of the qneetion whi ib ? \ I >?w
jwr eueyetimce, the bolls.
Joit aft this time Kicha'd '.V* eu n
turned from Europe. The arms! ' >
undeniably elaftant, bandiftuie, at. ?f ?:i
a gentleman, was ?o event; all tne f*>i
ionabJe word waa ia a flatter, and the ri\
aUatv at onoe that the important epoc
bad arrived. She whoae claims be *dn
eat?d, whom he favored with bia admin
tioo, would aft onoe aftand upon the prt
-carious funaele of belle-efcip, though thai
taeitoe were entirely different.
Emily brought to bear upon him th
~batteriaa of her sprightly wit, while Kai
adroitly laid the uiioe of appatently queei
Jy indiflerenoe. Am yet, though it wi
evident that Richard edmirad both, hi
preference was not known?perhaps 1
a. aa - a a_ 1.1 ^ft_ L
HftTOiy *(NW Olru Mil 'Tr?eu one n
thoagkt the moit ebarwiag.
But dwriaf tbla axpealtbn of tk? olaii
of the rivals, ooorerutton had 1mm gain
on. Ttw bat mot nov'l Md tkaopai
bad Wm diacawad a? well umoi of the
<a?taal fhoada j and io the aid* of ton
wioksdly witty tsMarka of Sadly a poo
woald he hahi?oHa lady, a 1md rou
<*** h?H la the halt. It atOM aoarar tfc
-door, aad tka word* oowld ha diatiaeti
ondsntood
You oo brained, iaipadoat jaokaotp*
I'll teaak jim quvaata f I'll aaakt bag
oa t otkor aid* of ywar north."
Tka do<* wm ftaaf npaw> wad fa walks
*
* . (M
- mm
he Hi
THAT DBPARTETil, SPEECH IS FEE
CHERA1
r. a tall, athletic young man, whoae really lady th
fine form was disguised in an ill fitting suit with th
g of evidently doiueBtic manufacture, and Confess
stood for a moment awkwardly looking tude,"
round him ; then hastily approaching Kate \jRn.
he flung his arms around her, and gave matron'
her a loud smack on the check. )y roQO
ki ' She withdrew herself, quickly and Benoet
,l- haughtily from his embraoe. : j^,,
? ! "8ir 1" said alio with froeting digni- ' ijUa^an,
ty . : a happ<
" I jaw ! d'?n't ye know who I bo ?" ex- j ^ attjj
tai.-ued the newcomer, in no wise discon- ] eioa(ju,
certod "Wall now. 1 do i
i r . V?" ~ y www ! gatheri
you ve forgot me. Don t yer know yer ^ Qj
' cousin Ben f Ye ??, I don't like fnrroiii' ^ . , .
, , . ? . . , ! tr??d ir
no how you can fix it, to I quit that and j ,
come to the city Jim Simpaon waa down ^
to our place, and he's doing fust rate here, j ^ tr0(|
He said it was dreadful hard to get a start : .
..... t . 1 outlines
in the city, bat guose I ain t a goin to ] ^
alump through where he gets ahead.?I'll |
lt rosk it any how " lie e
Catherine, at the commencement of the 8111
* apoech, had alternately flushed and paled, \ 8C on
a : for she was deeply mortified that Richard j "
>d | Warren and Emily Archer Bhould have atruggh
w . boon witnesses of aueh a scene. She ' wttempt
" caught a trinmphsnt glance from Emily. J as a ba\
It restored her pride. pennil#
With ell the grace of which ehe was tune I
rj mistress, she turned to the newoomer. j ten r*e
i? You mnst excuse me, cousin Ben," ? W1
the said, ?'I had forgotton you. A few j BioharJ
1 year? make a cbango, and I cm hardly j irg and
' retrace in your countenance a feature that i all, but
??reminda me of the lad who went ou'tiug ; are spar
with uie in the dear old w ods of Hainp- and obi
p ton. Allow me, Miss Archer," she added, | mere lo<
turning to her, "to present to you my -j^e
cousin, Mr. Adams?Mr. Warreu, Mr. ,t
V Adams," anJ with perfect co;nposure she fear j0
saw his awkward how and scrape. a bin It
e Euiily rt ouce coin men veil a cooverna* avo;d tJ
j tion with Mr. Adams, and was proceeding 1
" j to drig him out moat ridiculously, vrhcn {|ut
' Knte on me to the rescue. W'th
1 ? You forget, Archer," said she /
? . . s * . . . , * comfort
my cousin has just arrived in town ^ eg>o
r ami has not yet had an oppportuaity to see
'om. He will be better able to give bis j ^u,t
.p-nion of thoin io a few days, when I a 8cnt,<
i aii V fiave the pleasure of acting as hia "
" i c'i'.W..n*. master |
>lr. "> ?rrin, iike a well bred gentle- <4 Bu
^ ; \iai , ns ho w .s. addressed sonic remarks ; au^ * B
' ,t> Mr. Adauia on subjects which was fa- vant as
r ' miliar, and shortly after he. with Mist "
j Areher, took lenve ?Kate oould base JoU are
*' , cried with vexation as she thought of the 11,0 : ^
I sarcastic and ludicrous description of the , "
scene which Einily would deHght in giv- j y^0 0
6 ing. hut she controlled herself She w?* '"S c
r' a kind hearted girl, and could not forget J
the visits sho bad paid her dear unole and I ani\
aunt Adams, or Ben's untiring efforts to ' Pr*,nB
j mako her happy, when at bis father's | ol 1
jr ! house. Sue resolved to repay bicn now, j " I b
. i and her graciousness of manner quite foe- w?nt lc
* i cinated poor Ben, a* she made all aorta of not tbe
inquiries about the old farm. two hot
' I No sooner had Ricbard Warren, with Here ii
'? ! Miaa Archer, left the house, than aba be- an<^ "
I Ran, with all her powers of sarcasm, aa venieni
r { Kate bad foreseen. to ridicule the scene * baow
J they bad witnessed, Mr. Warren smiled little ti
but seemed absent. all will
" 1 had no iJ<?? that the Bennett's had
,1 such vulgar relations, continuod Emily, K^'P 1'
4 knowing well that tbe fastidious Richard ef* w*tl
j, would make this a serious objection to the " H<
u woman of bie choice. " Notwithstanding cousin
B. all Kate Beonett'a elegeooe, there ie a : ever re
N certain something about tbe family that t ?TU
? betrays low blood." ptr(
Yas." returned Warren, hardly know- ^jrj(
a- wjiat be had said ; and feeling that j0D.
: ?be had uaineJ one point, Emily walked norant,
1 on, in the host possible spirits, internally not ash
, i triumphing over the disoomfitere of bar 1 by the
r.j rival. I ? ?
u?, -"V
v 1 That oTeniriy, ?t the opera, who should neaa, ol
t br it Kate's aide but couain Hen ; dreaped amoaen
' in t*ate, and evidently much interested in of the i
h the performance, while Mtaa Beooett list- ly,ioes
>. eue<i with polite site a ti on to hie frank and I shoul
i. sensible oriticiama. At parties too, he then, c
9. waa bar attendant; and thie open acknow. sacrific
ir 1 edgement of her relatione quite blunted 1 kin lil
the point of Emilia aatirea. Mr. Beooett knew o
i? aaaietod the youth to a fit nation, and retry the rari
i speedily hie rusticity wore off. He had better I
j. both food look# and sense. Under his had no
>? cousin's judicious training, he eery eooo any aul
ii did her no discredit, even among the yon on
ii crowd of flat gentlemen that rarroooded getting
to her. yom rl
Emily A rotor mw all, and bit her lip with ji
m in Taxation. Sbo aoo'd not tot a ok bow. i* ?H e
ladga tto aupariority of Kate' strategy, dieaooi
and aba tod tviamphad in tto aeaal whieb atbara
the hoped would huiailiata bar. Oaod I
From that tin# Riobew) Warren was dinepp<
tor aawateut itwadaxt, and en* Ian to dtoah,
tod oyaaiy aabaawWdgad bia preference tkx* mi
by atari ag tor bia heart and toad. will tn
" fUta," to eeid, laortij after their to* 7-"r P
troth*), " I atoll aarar aaaaa to throb "I a
eeaatn Ma for wiring ma my bride ? " How
I admired yon aa a belle, but hie naming twiet >
ad yvar aaeeptioa of him prated that yon toppin
d wnraaematbiwf toller than a mara fttK l^ri
a
, %
/?*
g?TWg^l^Pl'^"BaF!W*g"ggHB^-i-J
ETING AS THE WiND?Rl
W, S. C., PE
it you wera i true woman, Heat
t greatest of ill attractions, heart,
t that yen owe him a debt of gratiy
yeara hid passed. In the sober
, Mr. Warren, one would havchardgnited
the dashing belle, Kate
t.
% with wealth, achecfUl home a *bnd
d and loving children she had led 1
j life, and tiino hnd but increased
ichinent of the wedded pair. But
Be as her life had been, a storm was '
ng. Hor husband always cheerfnl,
oody, restless and unhappy. She i
i vain to dieoover the cause of his
hut be only made evasive replies to
uiries, and she could only guess at
ibioH, that they were connected with
s she imagined. Her surmises
rveet.
olcred the room one day where she
tiug, aud exoluiraod, Hinging himthe
eofa?
te, we are ruined. In rain I hare
id for wecka past, it is usoless to
it longer. To day I shall be known j
tikrupt?penniless, tod worse than j
pi In tryng to double my for*
hare lost all You and my child- '
beggar*.
iy should loss of wealth trouble you j
I ?'*said bis <vifc tenderly,approach- i
taking his hand "Thath after
a trifling misfortune. While we
ed to each other, blest with health
ildren, why shouldtvc rrpius at the
?s of fortune ?"
husband groaned.
,tobc dishonest Kate." he said
look me in the fnce, because I am
Opt?unable to pay my dcDts To
lis, what have 1 done ? I hare
Inspires night* and anxious day
in vain.
i soothing word.* the wife tried to
hiia ; but sins, paid little heed hi
rts.
then a servant entered, saying that
imao wished to see Mr. Warren.
II him that I oannot," replied his
\ " I will a?.o nobody."
t you will," replied a oheerful voice
colletnan closely followed tlie aer*
be entered.
w is this my dear Dick?" be said
iu trouble, and lid not apply to
ist was pot right 7"
a of what una would it have bscn?" |<
d Warren. "I em weary of borrow- 1
>oe friend to repay the other, day 1
y. JSrcn that boa failed mc at last
are come to hide myself ffcom tho J
pazo of those who vill aoou be talkny
disgrace."
ad heard rumors of this, Dick, sod
i your ofhee to sec you; as you were
re, I followed you here. You hate jJ
irs yet before bank hours are over,
i a blank cheek ; fill it up yourself
iball bo duly honorod. IUpey at eor?- 1
ve. No thanka; it is only a loan,
your business well, sod that in a
me, with perhaps slittle assistance,
be rightWgaia.
lly overcome. Richard could on3t
lit* friend'# bund, while his eye# filli
unwonted moisture
)w can we ever tbaok you, dearest
Ben?" cried Kate. How can we
pay yon." '
t, tut, Kate; I am only discharging
of a debt I owe yon, my dear
I owe all I possess?all I am?to
When I first eame here, a raw, igawkward
country booby, you were
amed of mo. Tou took uie cordially
haod,influeneedyonr fat bar to assist
1 more thaa all, by an varying kindBoring
me s borne sod innoueot
aents in jour society, kept roe oat
neny temptations that beset a lonepenanced
lad, aocb as without yon
d hare been. I thanked you for it
Ten when 1 didn't appreciate the
e it vm in line lady to Lav* a pa tepee
myself about bar; and when I
wre of tha world and uodoratood
ity of anob oouduet, I loved you the
for it, and am the more grateful. I
opportunity to abow it befae, in .
biuwitl form. But now you hi
i uodar no obligations. I'm only ,
; rid of a Utile of the heavy load
aaad ma under long ago. Be off
>*, Dick, at) ' hereafter rely on aaa
lil* >1. ? " ' *
tmw ?? ymwr vun | BR
?god too m of 41
bould boes elastic tsmporomoctC.
>ys, Boar," ho addod, u Worroa
torod, kiaatag the toon from Koto's ,
"ond ho aaaumi that Boo Adams,
Itioooiro, has moot forgot tsa, cad
tly toy to repay yoor kiodaaao to
Jtr said OfMAAiri,
m richly yoid " aha aaottcrod
little 1 droomod, too? HM that
o my Kfo I ohooid owe my higfcaat
tote tha tritii| toh of MmMH
stay goo I oevatt."
V . . *"
\tt n
3ADING IS AN UNREMEMBERE
CEMBER 16, 11
BEAUTIFY YOUR HOME. [l
Every man should do hip best to own j
a home- The first money he can spare
ought to he invested in a dwelling ? c
where his family qau live permanently. '
Viewed as a matter of economy, this is
important, not only because he can or- (
dinorily build more cheaply than ho a
can ront, but because of tho expense 1
canned by frequent changes of residence. (
A man who early in life builds a home '
for himsolf and family, will save aomo 8
thousands of dollars in twenty yoars,
besides avoiding the inconvenience ;
and trouble of removals Apart from j1
tuis there is something agreoable to our
better nature in having a home we can
call oar own- It is & form of property
that is more than property* It speaks
to the heart, enlists the sentiments, and
enables the possessor to realize \ hap
niness that should be desired by all.?
Ihe association that'spring up around
it, as the birth-place of children?a*!the
scene of of life's holiest emotions?as
the sanotury where the spirit cherishes j
its purest thoughts, are such as all vai-1
ue; and vrheuever their influence is
exerted, the moral sensibilities are ire- i
proved and exalted. The greater part
of our happiness in this world i6 found 1
st home ; nut how few recollect that i
the happiness of to day is increased by
the place where wo were happy on yesterday,
and that, insensibly, scenes and
circumstances gather up a store of blesledness
for the weary hour of th6 fu- j
ture! Ou this account we should do
all in our power to make home attractive
Not only should we cultivate such t
tempers ae servo to render its inter-'
courso amiable and affectionate, but j
we should stoive to adorn it with those :
charms which good senso and refine- j
ment on easily impart to it. Wc say j
jasily, for there r.ro persons who thinf; ;
that a home cannot be beautiful with - i
ant a considerable ouiiay of money.?
Sueli pecplo are in error. It nosis lit-. *
fin In ) lft Vf) ft ft Ml t AWCI' l?'Lr/1nw ' $
to surround your dwelling with those
simple bc&uticu which , slight th< cyo j j
far moro than expensive objoaV- If I ;
you will let the sunshine and tbo dew I '
ado.n your yard, tliey will do more for {
you than any artist. Nature delights
iu beauty. Sho loves to brighteu the j
landscape and uiake it agreeable to the
eye. She hangs the ivy arouud the
ruin, over the stump of a withered tree
twines the graceful vineA
thousand arts sho practices to nni- |
mate the senses and please the mind?
Follow her example and do for yourself j ^
what she ia always laboring to do for | .
yon. Beauty is a divine instrumentality. J
It is one of God'S chosen forms of povr- j!
or. We never see creative energy t
wftbout something beyond mere exis-1 (
tanoc, and honoe the whole univcrso is
a teacher and inspite of beauty. Every (
man was born to be an artist, so far as (
the appreciation and enjoyment of beauty
are concerned, and he robs himself
of one of 'he procioua gifts of his being
(the fails to fulfill this benefioial purpose
of his creation. ?Sunday Timet.
?
A New Youk Polttican is thus painted
in s publio lecture delivered iu Boetoo
sn evening or two eiaoe, by the Hon. (
JofUAU QtJlKCT 2 !
<*lf we would viait Washington, and
look behind the curtain, wo shoeld be
shooked to Cod how large s Dumber of
member* either pare, or withheld their j
votes for peouniery reasons. It had oome
to he considered merely u a hoainese tranaeotioa
He had lately witnessed io New |
York, a esse where open bribery was practised
; bed aeen 126 given for a tingle ,
vote, and on his expressing surprise that a j
man could afford to pay such a anro for
one vote, he was assured that the oandi? ,
date, if re-eleeted, would make a money
tasking operation of.it; be had made $30,
000 at the laet aesaien for getting a bill
through, and at that rate oonld afford to '
pay a good price. This waa understood by
the constituent*, who were content aa long
as ha paid then iy?ernlly for their votes; ;
and to tee lack of ioUgnty ia thoaa ooestitoasts,
after all, eosdd he treoed these resuits."
Hsgmysnoii of Puov. B. T.
At the ofeteuog of the Board of Trustees
of the South Carolina Coilegd, oe Wad see ,
day eveulag last, tike ceeifaction of Prut
Brtoiuby ef the JProfeeeor*b:p of Chemistry
sad Oeeiogy, wee prweeSed sad jeeepted.
Hs retires to eososqoeass at continued
ill hulih.?? CWvltoa*.
JL Wntwi odkcr my th*t ft child ?M
nut orsr by th*m mn old mm! m
otom eyed mm! which nsssr tpofcft *<Wrmuds.
Be also gh*? his reads** wm
linos which he sftjs wsrs writtsft by ft
ymtgmmtt wW hss loug dace Isiw ift the
gn*? At hi* *?
[mil
D PASTIME; BUT A WRTTIN'
8 5 6,
RULES OF HEALTH FOB M ABB I ED
LADIES.
The following advice to married ladiee,
:ouieh from the coluroro of the Buffalo
Republic :
Get up at three o'clock iu the mcmiug,
ilean out the itovrs, take up the asb*e,
iweep the front side-walk, and acrub the
'ront step, oureo tho baby, put tbo mackerel
to soak, build the fires, grind tho oof'oo,
get out jour buaband'n things to warm,
ieo the $hirt aired, boil the mackerel, set!e
tbo coffee, ect tho table, rouse the
iouso, carry up some hot water for shavng,
to that brute* of a lazv husband, sud
iry tho morning paper. By this time you
*ill have an appetite for breakfast. Held
be baby during the raes), is you like your
jroalrfaai cold.
After breakfast, waah the dishes. nurre
he baby, duat everything, wash the winlora,
wash. and drcoe the baby?(that panry
wanta cleaniog out and scrubbing)?
lurse the baby, draw the baby in Lis wagin
fivo ox eix miles for the benefit of his
lealtli; nuree him when you return, put
^ tbe potatcos, and the cabbags (nurse
be baby) and the corned ktcf, r don't for
:?t to nuree the baby) er.o the turnips, and
nuree the habylfawocp everything; tako
ip tbe dinner, at: thu tab!*, fill the assort,
change the table-cWtU, (there, that
aby rants nursing.) Cat yju: "dinner
old ".gain, and?aura* the baby.
After dinner, wish the dishcc, gather
ip all the dirty c!ether and put then to
oak, nurse tbe baby every half hour; re
eivo a doxen oalla, intertpert?d with oursng
tbe baby ; drag the paty a mile or two;
mrry home ; reske biscuit*, pick up soma
odfieh, oat some dried beef , Catnip tea
or babv'a in^rnal disarrangement: bold
he baby au hour tr? quiet him ; put, sonic
iloohel in the metro.; baby a speoiimtfh of
?orpctual motion ; tea rrsdy ; take your*
old, ?a urufcl.
After tea, wajli up the dishes ; put.
icJi to soak , chop ?ooi-? hash j send for
o-nc more augar ; (^gracious, how tho eu?
jar rfort go?nndthirteen cent* a pound 0
jot. down the stockings *ud darn thorn ;
tccp 011 nursing the bnby; wait up till
wolve o'clock nursing the baby, till hus
>and coiuoe with a donblo shu'ite on tho
ruiit ntc'pB, a dtK'iuvu Jiuvalij, aiid & uiormiiutiou
to sleep iu the baok yard ?
>rr jr hiin up at aire to bed ; then nurse
be baby and go to Bleep. Woman in deicate
health will find that tho above praciee
will either kill or oure tbctn
Crooaed Enough,Certainly "You
ire rather & crooked character, Mr. Joues."
" Rather, air, but not quite ao crooked n*
i tree I once knew It ?u the tallest
autterout I over saw. Standing cl -se to
it one day in a thunder storm, 1 -aw a
iquirrel on oue of ita topmost branchoa.?
The lightning struck the tame branch above
three feet above him, and the squirrel
itarted The lightning had to follow the
grain, of course, and the squiwcl went
iualnKf /Jamw Qa ,I- ,.rl mam iUaA Amaa
mst^uv mvtihi *-j\j v>>vvau\? nno uuuv ucUj
lir, that the squirrel, by my watch, got to
the bottom precisely three minutes before
the lightning."
11 That's s lie !" cxcUimed the landlord
4? A lie! true as any story over wait. I
afterward* saw that tree cut down snd
made into rails for a hog pasture. The
hoes would erswl through twenty tiroes a
day, and so crooked were them are rails,
that every time tho hogs got out they found
ihemsolvte baok in the pasture again I"
. ?V
A fseetioua Irish barrister! who neither
acknowledged nor repudiated the oode oi
honor, sent some of his witty thefts so
truly home to soother braggadocio brother
ship of the res) l^ockuey school, that a
shalleoge wsa the reault. It was aoeepted,
and the parties retired to a common near
London, to settle the matter with pistols.
There happened to be a milceUooe standing
on the spot selected, and tho Cockney,
who was lame, naked the Irishman if hs
would permit him, on account of his Isme
sees, to rest upon the milestone while Hs
bud. "Most unquestionably," was the
rtp;y. im ground vu measured up to
tbo milootona, the pistol* wera hsing loadod.
sad th? Cock as; was taking op ku
position, whsn tka Irish mtq, In tK? blandNt
and most polits manner imaginable,
saksd his sntagoaast if hs would grant
kim ons rsqassa. "Cartainiy; what it
it V "Just that you t. ill has* tbs kind*
MN to allow mo to rost upon tbo othoi
milaoas wbilo wo are firing ?t esoh other "
This dioohsrgo of gonial homer pwt so sad
to thedaol, and they rsaornod good fiieedr
A ooxsomb, talking of tha tranamigra.
tlos of souls, tald??la tbo tiaa of Mom
I km no doabt X was tks geldocr aalf"
? Vsry liksly," rapliad a lady, xtlme
baa rohhad you sf eotK i a g bat aha gild
a*/;
? Sam, U my ooffet hot 7" crisd an old
boekator to hit sorraot. *? I gncM not yet
Mama? X spit on hUp and be ot male,"
ropUad ?atr
*
*
fr .
u <$>
3 IS ETERNAL."?Tuppkr.
_ ^ mam^.t^rgtcr I ?????
NO. 26.
.i.j-f .- ^ I ?t 'i. a^?o>?<||W>ac????p???WM>
AN EDITOR DREAMING OF
MARRIAGE.
A baobelor editor out Weet, who bad
received from the fair band of a bride a
piece of elogsnt weddiug cake to dream on,
thus gave the recult of bis experience.
put it under the head of our piL *
low, shut our eyes swoetly X3 an infant. "
! an?l blessed with au easy conscience aooa
snorod prodigiously. The Qod of dreams
i gently touched us, and lo ! in faacy we
were married. Ne7er was a little editor
so happy. It was, 'my lore, dearest,
j sweetest," ringing in our earn oonetantly.
i Oh ! that the droam had broken off here.
Cut no, some evil genius put it into the
head of our duoky to have pudding for
dinner, just to please her lord.
In a hungry dream we eat down to
dinner. Well, the padding moment ?r
! rived, and a huge slice almost obscured
from sight the plate before us.
My dear,' eaid we fondly, ' did you ^
make tbia?'
Yes, lovo, aint it nice.'
Glorious?the beet bread pudding I
?7tr tasted in my life.'
4 Plux pudding, duoky' suggested my
I wife
i Oh, dr.araat/ bread pudding I a!|
wis fond of.
< Call that bread padding ?' exclaimed
Try wife, whik- hcrsveotliDe wrled light*
!* with contempt
? Certainly wy dear ; reckon I've hid
! er.cugh *< the hhamrcod House to know
broad pudding, my luvo, by ail moans.,
t ? Husband?this is really tco bad ; plum
pudding ia twice as hard to make m bread
pudding, and ia more expensive, and is a
' great deal better. Isay thia is plum pudding,
air !' and nay pretty wife's brow fluah!
e.l witb rx^itetncDt.
1 * My lore, my sweet, my dearest love/
exclaimed wo, soothingly, ?do not gjt ani
gry : I'm sure it is vory good if it is bread
| pudding '
' You mean, low wretcli,' Corcely replied
| my wife, in a higher tone, 'vott know it'a
plum puduing.'
'Then ma'am it is very neatly put to1
gether, and so badly burned that the devil
i hiiusclf couldn't know it. I toll you ma'
i am distinctly and emphatically, and will
. i .. _ ?>: ...j >k..i j j.
> UUl UVUuaUiHIiUiCUi ?u?t it giiiB jnluj
iUnp? and the maeaeat kind at that.
* ltd plum pudding,' ulmeked my wife v
an like haded glass of claret ia my faoa
the glass itself tapping the c'aret from my
i uoae
' Bread pudding 1* gasped we, pluok to
the last and grasping a roasted chicxen by
the left leg.
'Plum padding!' rose above the din, as I
I had a distinct perception of feeling two platen
smashed upon my head.
'Bread pudding 1* wc groaned in a rage
is the ohicken left our hand, and flyiag
with swift wings across the table, landed
in madam's bosom.
'Plum pudding!' resounded the war-cry
from the enemy, as the gravy dish took ur *
where we had deposited the drat part of
J! 1 . 1 -?- .
I our aioner, una a piate or oeouianaea upon
our white eeet.
'Bread pudding foreter I* shouted we ia
defiance, dodging the soup turreen and
falling beneath its content*.
'Plum pudding!' jelled ibe amiable
1 spouse, as noticing our rmatortuce, she
determined to keep us down bj bringing
upon our head the dishes with no gentle +
' hand. Then in rapid succession followed
the war cries Plum pudding ! she bhrieked
with evotj dish
'Bread pudding !'in smothered tones
' came up from the pile in reply.
> Then it wu 'plum pudding' in rapid
" succession, the last orj growing feebler,
> till just as I can distinotly reoolleot, it had
* grown to a whisper. 'Plum pudding;' idee
' thunder, fallowed by a tremendous crash,
I as 31 y wife leaped upon the pile with her
delicate feci, tad commenced jamping up
and down?when thank heaven, we awoke
and thus mvkI oar life.
We tball never dream on wedding oako
again?that's the moral.
IniaH Fiucnojra?The Limerick (Ire*
land) Chronicle saya i? " Poisonous
ad alterations of whufeey were never
practised to sooth an extent aa at the
present, by the admixture of one third
spirits,' one-third aquafortis, one-third
Titroib <wut on+tkird waUr. This is the
Wto *
A Crowxxo Hzn.^?Rer. Mr. MoCtapa,
en aooantrlo bet talented tana, when act.
, tied in Maide*, ones gave oat this eotiee,
Is Ih* iWa MM1 a*
gUt of tL? nwry in hit w?)pm>Hiiii? * I
, o<? rtqnMttd to gNt jtotioo tb*t on Mot- <
4*7 nigbc., on o'i boo will ttttmptte erot
likt t cook at tb? Town Bolt ; uui nflwkt
V04M Like to teat hot will awtnA." Tb?
I ttsndenimok Aeeic*iel*AW lenraed ?4Uw
. w?K? tk? Mlao *?ey Stent wimU "HS?
' tn nttfii'#rtfrtt nt4? tWa-BoH 4ik
At eigM mtntlneH K
^ W