The people. (Barnwell C.H., S.C.) 1877-1884, March 06, 1884, Image 1
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8. ArttdM for poblicttlon ahonld be
writtm in a dear, legible hand, and on
only one aide of the page.
4» ill ehangeain.adeertieement» matt
each ne on Friadr.
VOL. VII. NO. 2£
“THINGS THA T ARE NOT.'
I dreamed a dream of Love, t t
That »ho waa holy, pure, and true,
A friend to ghr* delight on earth,
A voice to bid man look above,
Her constancy her only worth,
Alas! like this she comes to very few.
I heard her sacred name
On lips of many, yonng and old,
I looked their idol in the face,
A giddy, pleasure-seeking dame,
Whose vanity is her disgrace,
Whose summer friendship fades. ..befor»
the cold.
Is love then bnt a dream, •
* The sweetest fancy man can know?
Or has she broken earthly bars
And fled, with her celestial gleam.
To shine aloftfamong the stars
And look with scorn upon .the cloud*
below?
When Fsith and Hope are dead,
When life has for its only aim
To seek the passing moment’s bliss,
To And sufficiency of bread,
Man soon his highest joys will miss, ^
And seeking Love will find her bnt s
enme flying into the roan, without any
more waramgAhjuTiFhtiaJmd been shot
from a gun. "
“The old missus spys you are to come
over at once, both you ladies 1” she cried,
standing before Mrs. Rashleigb, and re
peating her iessou like a parrot. “There’s
something of importance, and you’re
needed at wonst”
“Get your bonnet, Cornelia,” said her
mother. “I’ll just put on this sun-hat
. What is it, Sally; do you know f”
“I know it’s something dreadful Mia-
sos is almost wild, and there’s lota of
folks there. Something about Mr.
THE I.OVKjlSV QUARREL
“Never, while I live," said Miss Rash-
leigh, “never while I live, will I see your
face again!” *
She meant it whei^ she said it; and as
she spoke, she threw her l>etrothal ring
towa: d her lover, who hod offended her.
It missed him and rolled down upon
the floor and over the sill of an open
china closet—one of those old-fashioned
closets that used to stand on either side
of the mantel-piece.
She did not notion where it rolled; he
did tbo'ugh; and after she had left the
room, he turned to pick it up. The ring
she had worn would always be precious
to him. i
Miss Rashleigh went straight to her
own room, as miserable a girl as ever
lived, and a moment later Grandmother
Rashleigh bustled iuto the drawing-room,
pushed the open closet door to, picked
up the fallen magazine, set the annuals
and books of poetry straight on the
table, pulled down the shades, arranged
the chairs mathematically against the
wall, and bustled out again.
“I’ve had these things fifty years,” she
said to herself, “and there’s Cornelia and
her liean with no more respect for them
than if they were so much lumber.” .
Then she closed the door behind her.
ami went away to her own room up-
stairs, where a fine silk patchwork quilt
was in the frame, a surprise for said
Cornelia.
Grandmother Rashleigh gave every
young person of the family something of
her own manufacture oil his or her wed
ding day.
“Now,” the old lady hod said a dozen
times to Tripheuy King, who was help
ing her; “I rather think Cornelia will
have the best thing I’ve done; and
there’s a bit in it of every handsome
silk there’s ever been in the 1 family, and
of her father’s and grandfather’s wed
ding vests.”
“Yes’m, it’s a real memorial quilt,"
said Tripheny. “It tabes you, mum, to
plan such things.” _
The quilt was finished and bound that
afternoon, and Tripheny’s job of quilt
ing being over she went home. But she
carried about the village the news that
she “was sure all was over between Miss*
Rashleigh and Mr. Spear. She’d heard
Cornelia seyiug something to her
grandma, and the old lady was furious.”
“He would never have done that if he
had cared for me, you know, grandma,"
Cornelia was saying at that moment.
“Stuff and noncsenne f He loves the
ground you walk on 1” said the old lady.
“You’ll never get such another, Cor-
neJiaT
“I shall never marry at. all; I hate
men 1” Cornelia answered.
And then her grandmother made the
house too hot to hold her, and she went
over to her mother’s, her usual course
when she fell out with grandma. ,
Three days passed. At the end of the
third Piety Pratt stepped in at Mrs.
Rashleigh’s—young Mrs. Rashleigh, as
they called her, though she was nearly
fifty, for grandma was old Mrs. R*-b
leigb.
“I expect yqu’ll feel upset when I te
you the news, Cornelia,” she said. “To
hAe been too cruel this time—he, he,
he ! Orville Spear ha’n’t been heard of
sinoe he was at your house. His mother
says he went over to explain and make
up, and he never came back—he, he!
She thought maybe he’d stepped over to
his brother’s, but he hadn’t—he, he 1 I
reckon he’s drowned himself I”
“I don’t know why the whole town
•hoold talk over my affairs and every
meddling old maid giggle about them !”
cried Cornelia.
Piety jumped to her feet, seized her
parasol and turned toward the door.
“Good afternoon, Miss Cornelia and
Mm. Raslfleigh,” she said, with s con
temptuous courtesy. “I'll remember
my manners, if other folks forget theirs.
Only there’s other folks as likely to be
old maids as me, and I fancy it’s Mrs.
Spear’s affair now if anything has hap
pened to her boy 1” - .
Away flounced Miss Pratt. — - ~ # ~
“You’ve pnt Piety into' s rage, Cor
nelia,” said Mm. Rashleigh. ‘That’s a
pity; she has s long tongue. 1.
But Cornelia waa crying.
“Oh, mother, dear,” she sobbed, “it
isn’t true, is it t Orville did feel dread
fully. Won’t you pee, mother?”
But at thia moment Sally, the little
servant girl from Gradma Rashleigh’s
The two ladies said no more. Tb«y
hurried away together, and entering
grandma’s parlor, found there assembled
more of the memliers of the Spear family
aud a friend or two besides.
Orville had indeed disappeared. He
had never been home sinoe his visit to
Cornelia, and now the alarmed relatives
sere anxious to get all the information
they could regarding the interview be
tween Orville inij;Coruel ia. ^ .
“I had-; Reason to be angry, Mrs
Spear,” said Cornelia, proudly; “good
reason, and I took off my ring and gave
it back and went out of the room. I
don’t know when he went or where. I
—I thought he wouldn’t mind so much.
I believed ho had stopped caring about
me.” i
“He ought to now, at all events,” said
grandma
“My boy is dead, I’m sure. -I shall
have the ix>nd dragged I” said Mrs.
Spear, amidst her tears. “He left all
his money at homo, - He wouldn’t have
gone traveling without a change o
clothes. Ob, you wicked girl ?”
“I hope,” cried the eldest Miss Spear,
“that he’ll haunt you 1”
“I could kill you, ypu hateful thing !”
cried the youngest Miss Spear.
Cornelia had kept up bravely until
now-; bnt when* her two friends turned
upon her thus, she gave a little scream,
and fell over on the sofa. She was in a
dead swoon,*and the water they sprin- "
kled in her face did not bring her to.
Grandma grew frightened.
“I hope it isn’t an attack of heart dis
ease,” she said. “Poor child ! she looks
as if she were dead. ^
“Oh, don’t say that!’’ cried th
mother.
They gathered around Cornelia ar
did all they could for her, and soon si
recovered and sat up, bnt all her priU
was gone.
“Oh, dear! oh, dear!” she sobbed,
“I wish I had died ! • I wish I had never
come to ! Oh, Orville ! Orville! wfli&t
has become of you ?”
“Oh I oh I” moaned the mother.
“Oh ! oh !’’ moaned the sisters.^
And Cornelia’s head fell back again.
“Emma, get the lavender out of the
ohina-clueet,” said grandma to her
daughter. “Quick ! It’s on the corner
shelf {" —■ ■
Mrs. Rashleigh rushed to the closet.
“It won’t open,” she cried, wildly.
“It’s a patent lock,” said grandma;
“locks as it shuts. Here’s the key.”
Aud Mrs. Rashleigh flew back to tho
door,.^pened t it aj^j uttered a shriek.
There on the floor, huddled up under
the shelf lay poor Orville Spear.
He^was white and limp.
Cornelia sat and stared at him in the
most awful way. She thought him
dead, but the more experienced matron
saw that he was yet living.
Sally was sent post-haste for the doc
tor; and. there, in Mrs. Rashleigh’s
drawing-room, he found Cornelia and Or-
sighed Cornelia. “Oh, bov pale you
are 1” ’
“Aud how pale you are, Cornelia !*
sighed Orville. “Did you really care
when you thought I was dead ?*’
“Ladies,” said Grandma Rashleigh,
“now that Orville is getting on, let us
go into the other room ana leave these
two young folks to talk things over to
gether,"
She led the way; the others followed.
When the tea-bell rang toon after,
Orville and Cornelia came out 6f the
drawing-room arm-in-arm, aitl the wed
ding-day was fixed.
floating YlllAgw,
LOTTE
COMMUNITIES THAT liTE ON TBS
CLUSTERED CANAL BOATS.
Romeo and Juliet in the scene at the
tomb, and the rest of the party in a
state of bewilderment and torror past
description.
At last, however, both were conscious
and seated in arm-chairs, regarded each
other, while the observers kept silence;
and Mr. Orville Spear uttered the first
words.
"Of all confounded fools ”
"Who, dear?” asked his mother.
“Me,” said Orville, regardless of,
grammar. “Who shut me in ?”
“What were you in the closet for?"
asked grandma, with a guilty con
science.
‘To pick something up that rolled
there,” said Orville.
“The ring?” asked Cornelia, fran
tically.
“Yes, the ring,” said Mr. Spear.
“More fool I! Some one banged the
door to. I shouted and howled and
kicked, and no one heard me.”
“Oh, oh, oh, oh!” shrieked Cornelia.
“I believe yon hid there to kill me, for
no other purpose than out of revenge. ”
“Youi banged the door ou me,” said
Mr. Spear. “A jealous woman would
do any thing."
“I banged the door, OrviUe!” said
old Mra. Rashleigh. “I! You’d left
everything flying. I just pushed it as I
passed, and yon ought to 1 bless your
stars that you are alive, for people don’t
go into the drawing-room, sometimes for
a fortnight in this small family. We
use the parlor much more, and I am
deaf, and so is old Hepsiba, and you
might have died there. Yes, and you’d
have killed him, Cornelia,” added the
old lady, “throwii]g his pretty diamond
ring on the floor I”
“Oh I" moaned Cornelia. “Oh 1”
“It wasn’t her fault, I was a con
founded fool all through I" cried Orville.
‘T knew that closet had a spring-lock.
No; don’t blame Cornelia.”
“I shall always Mama myself P
People who visit the neighborhood of
the Atlantic or Erie Basins will notice
the smoke curling from the littfe stunted
stovepipes projecting above the neat
white cabins of the scores of catal boats
that remain there the winter through.
About the decks, when The siftw is on,
will be seen the tracks left by fee shoes
of little ones, the French-heel^ shoes
of maidens and the broad soles of the
men. There are other easily-found
signs which show that in every boat a
family is living, and that, in fad, these
collections of boats are comminities,
separate and distinct like villages in the
country. These families are botnd to
gether by social ties and by simiUr bus
iness interests. The boats furnish them
their means of livelihood, and are their
homes the year round. They inter
marry, and many a man among them
was bom on a boat of parents who were
on the canal about all their lives before
him. More quiet, peaceable, indistri-
ous communities cannot be found than
the villages floating in these basins.
The community of interests among
them is so strong that a society was
formed some years ago for the advance
ment of their iwouninry and othef in
terests. By its efforts the Agitation was
started which first took the toll from the
unloaded boat and nt last gave New
York State its free canal. The society
is now called the Canal Boat Owners
and Commercial Asscciatfon. It num
bers over 200 membem.—N. Y. Sim.
Smashing ’em All Up.
In 1861 when Generd McClellan made
his demonstration on Hrmch -sb r in order
(o cover his real design of approaching
Richmond by the Peninsula route,
he marched as far as Berryviile, West
Virginia, and a little beyond there re
traced his steps and with haqte pro
ceeded to embark his troops on board of
transports to be ca.Tied to Fortress
Monroe.
On the advknce toward Wiucliostei.
when the head of the column had
reached Charlestown, greater cantion
was olmerved on the march, as it was
expected that the enemy would be en
countered at Berry vile. A Western brig
adier was sent forward' with his brigade
to feel the enemy.. Now this officer had
seen service in Mtxico and was ac
counted a brave and experienced Niffloer.
As he'<passed at the head of his troops
by the regiment of OoL Owen, of Phila
delphia, he stopped, and pulling his
moustache as was his aabit, said: 1 ‘Look
out now, Colonel, you’ll hear music soon,
sir. I’ll knock ’em sll to thunder if 1
meet ’em. Make no mistake, sir."
Then he rode on and sure enough,
about the time he should have arrived
at Berryviile, the .boom of cannon waa
ville lying quite unconscious, like heard and the troops hurried to the
front. We went up. at the double- quick
and when near Berryviile met the brig
adier coming back radiant with joy.
Polling his moustache again he cried out:
“What did did T tell you? T made ’em
bounce. They brought out a battery
into the open ground, just beyond town,
but it never fired a shot, sir. I knocked
it all to flinders before it could un-
limber." Troops hurried on and as we
came to the spot indicated we found a
threshing machine utterly wrecked and
a dead horse in th« harness, o still
hitched to it. In a home near by were
some farmers frightened half to death.
They had been going out to thresh some
grain when- the rampart brigadier saw
them gnd, opened his batteries on them.
When the brigadier heard he had de
stroyed a threshing machine only his jaw
fell and it was many a day before he
heard the last Of his ludicrous adven
ture.
4
Meeting Trouble.
Never meet trouble half-way
Numbers of people really make them
selves ill by going out to meet disaster
and misfortune—in other words, ity
fancying all sorts of bad things are about
to happen to them.
As a rule, not a tithe of these terrible
eventualities ever occur, and all the
shrinking apprehension is undergone for
| nothing.
A man, especially k family man and a
: father, ought always to prepare for the
! worst—for instance, by insuring bis life.
v Bnt this is no reason for his getting np
every morning and fancying he is going
to die before noon!
If people always lived within their
means, always had a little put by, and
never let the future worry them unduly,
they would lead far happier lives than at
present seems to be the
To fill the hour ,iud leave no crevice
for .repentance or an approval—that is
happiness.
IT IS BEST TO KEEP SOBER.
4 YOUNG MAN DBUNK, AND THE POM.
WON IN WHICH IT PI.ACRM HIM
BENT mm..
An Ori«laal Wav st Telling
Is Beet set te Drlak u
l.ssek.
wfev it
Mack Free
\ [From Peek’s Boa.]
A young man who signs hiioaif “A
Bounced One," writes and asks the fol
lowing question: “Is a girl right in giv
ing her fellow the bounce, if he comes
homo full of—not love, but beer—once,
only once, during a two year’s engage
ment?” The girl is the one to judge
whether she is right or not. If she
thinks she is right,- that sat ties it, It
does not follow that because a young
man gets full once in s two year’s en
gagement, that he would necessarily
make a drunken husband, but a girl is
supposed to know whether she Wonts to
take the chanoes or not It is not a
light thing to be drunk in the presence
of one you love, young maa. Yon may
laugh at it, and think she will look upon
it as a joke, but you are liable to knock
ail the love out of her heart, when you
think you ore smart She thinks of you
as a noble man, and your picture is in
her heart, engraved, as it were, there,
just as she sees you when you arasU.
your brightest and best What a shock
it gives her to see you drunk, with yonr
eyes blood-shot and watery, your hair,
that, perhapa, she has stroked with her
gentle hand, all tangled up and full of
cheese sandwich! She has admired
your gentlemanly bearing, and now she
s t» you staggering, and left-handed in
both feet. She has learned to love to
hear you laugh, and see you smile, and
the echoes of your pleasant words linger
in her soul, and when she hears that
maudlin laugh of drunkenness, and seen
a leer in place of the heavenly smile, aud
listens to your words, that come thick
and uncertain, as- though from your
stomach, and she does not know b«t tho
next words that come will be accompa
nied by stale beer and free lunch, yon
cannot wonder that she gives you the
liounee.
You would not go and have your
photograph taken when you were drunk,
and present it to her, and yet, when you
appear before her in that condition, your
appearance is photographed oh hor heart,
and the new pictures takes the place of
the old one that has been there, and try
however bard she may to nee you as she
wants to, bright and sobefl, And a true
lover, for the life of her, she cannot
erase the drunken picture, and while she
would forgive you if she could, she feels
that you have hurt her terribly. She is
not to blame, poor girl, for bouncing
yon. Ton bounced yourself out of her
heart when yon thought you were smart,
and got full. True love and drunken
ness cannot exist, where the parties are
refined. You had rather she would
bounce you than to have her tolerate you,
aiul always have that picture of your
drunken condition coming up before her.
You can probably find a girl, less refined,
who would overlook your getting drank,
and you may marry such a one, but
you will always love the little finger of
the good girl who bounced you more
than you can ever love the one who will
overlook and laugh at your drunkenness.
It is a serions thing to do as you have
done, and forty yean from now, instead
of thinking you did « smart thing, you
will discover that you made a colossal
fool of yourself. If you think so now,
and decide that ahs has done right jond
can convince her that you realize what
you have done, and are not too prond to
go and tell her about it, and ask her
pardon, it may be well with you, but if
you feel that she is over-nice, and has
wronged you, you had better stay away,
and-then
to, with no
complain, and you will regret your act
as long as you lire. It is best to keep
sober.
An International Question.
Dr. Edward Nunez, of Philadelphia
received word from relatives in Cuba
that Colonel Emilio Nanez, a tobacco
importer of that city, had been arrested
while on l>oard the American schooner
John B. Hamil, Jr., tying in the harbor
of Sagua la Grande, Cuba. Colonel
Nunez had formerly lieen an officer in
the patriot army and recently applied
for a passport to return to Cuba to settle
his brother’s estate. Thia was refused.
He then embarked on the schooner as
one of her ore*, not intending to lend
on Cuban soil. The schooner reached
Cuba January 12, and two days after
ward a demand was made for the sur
render of Colonel Nunez. Thty was re
fused by the schooner’s captain; and an
armed crew from a man-of-war then took
him prisoner. Dr. Nnnez left for Wash
ington to lay the case before the Secre-
t;ury of State.
“Thebe were 650,000,000 menhaden
taken in the waters about New York and
in Long Island Soand r last season," said
a dealer in oils to a reporter, “but they
were so poor that the oil secured from
them was only 1,800,000 gallons, against
nearly $2,060,000 gallons from 850,-
000.000 fish token in 1882. The fer
tiliser made, however, in 1888 waa
a third more than that made in the
previous year—about 40,800 tone against
30,000, in favor of last season. The
market is full of the fertilizer, and it
is being held for bettor prices.
The SlAaaor watch a Waatc
Nettles aae Slaat AaiteaMr.
“Lawiug it" is one of the most ridiou*
Ions parts of the experienoe of Amer-
oans. It seems to be considered a cheap
luxury to have a lawsuit, and yet it is
very expensive. It has got so half of the
people seem to have a chip ou their
shoulder all the time, ready for some
body to knook it off, and the first thing
they do when they think they have been
injured is to go for a lawyer tar a justice
of the peace, and a lawsuit is the result;
men who are not interested are token
from their busineee.tp sot as jurors, and
ill feeling li created that lasts forever.
The fact that the poorest person in the
world can indulge in a lawsuit, and ba
encouraged by lawyers, and pointed at
as “the one who had the lawsnit," causes
many cases in courts. Instead of using
every other device for a settlement ol
differences before resorting to the courts,
a lawsuit in the first thing thought of.
If s man slips down ou the sidewalk, he
looks up to see who owns the building
in float of which he fell, with s view of
suing him for damages, even before he
feels of himself to find if he ia hurt He
does not stop to think that perhaps his
boots are to blame, being run over at
the heel, and it does not enter his head
that he is liable to be beaten in the law
suit and have a bill of oosto saddled onto
him. Two men are driving in opposite
FIND IN THBSf
OTKK.
TOSMIUt
WHAT WE
MUSICAL COUNTERFEIT
“One of these dollars la a counterfeit,
ma’am.”
“How can you toll ?"
“Simply by sound. Just top H, a*
hear how clear the genuine sounds.
That’s tend*. Notice wfacn l tap the
other one. That’s baea.”—Autttn Sift
ing*.
wife. »-
directions and run into each other, and,- “ Well, my dear,” observed the wicked
without stopping to reason together to
see 3 the damage cannot be amicably
settled, they shake their fiats at each
other, .call names, and one drives off
after a policeman and the other goes to
a justice of the peace to complain, and
a lawsuit is the result, in which both are
damaged more than by the accident, but
each always believes that the other is a
pirate, and their children quit speaking
to each other. If men who have differ
ences would go to some neighbor and
state their ease and abide by his deci
sion, shake hands and be friends after
ward, the country would be better off
Not many months sgo a man felt ag
grieved at something that appeared in
the Sun, and after blowing around tor s
day or two he came to the office to inter
view the editor. He explained his
grievance, aud wound up by saying that
his lawyer had told him that the article
was libelous, and that he could recover
damages. The editor never had a law
suit and never wanted one, and he said
to the man:
“Partner, a lawsuit is s foolish way to
enjoy religion. Now, I’ll tell you what
to do. You go to the President of the
Merchants’ Association, of which you
are a member and I am not Have the
President appoint a committee of five
men from the association to hear your
statement Yon take the paper contain
ing the obnoxioos artiois to them, and
state your case, just as strong as you
can. I will not make any defense.
Whatever amount they say you have
been damaged I will give a check for,
and we will shake hands and be friends,
and go to the same church as usual, and
listen to the same minister preach the
gospel If 1 have damaged you, you
most have your moneys bat we don’t
wan’t to spend the balance of our lives
iu a lawsuit” ' ^
The man stopped and thought a mo
ment, and said:
“That is the fairest proposition I ever
heard, and yon don’t owe me a cent, and
the matter shall drop from this mo
ment.” 1
If people would never go into a law
suit until they couldn’t go into anything
else, there would be fewer men with ene-
A BOY WITH AH ETE TO
-JjJEh—. ma’am. I’ll -dean your side
walk for a quarter." TJ “ ‘ “
“But it ia cleaned. • I just paid a boy
thirty cento to shovel off the snow, and
yet you are the sixth boy who wanted to
dean it over. 1 presume there’ll be
twenty more.”
“Then, ma’am, gimme fifteen cents
and f 11 sit on the door-steps and tell ’em
thev’re left I” *
A BIRD IE THE HAND.
“My d&rliug, you do not beetow upon
me so much affection as you did before
we were married,” remarked a pouting
bride of four years to her husband.
"Don’t I ?” he replied.
“No, Chjurles, you, do not;-you pay
very little attention to me,” said hia
■pend altogether fob much time ia play.
You must buckle down to work."
“AH right, lather," was the dutifal re-
shed, shmghii skates over hia
and dtoappeeied, aotto return until
ger drove hia home for supper.
“Well," avslalw^Mi the irat
“where kMOJoH been all day, tir r
- - ar |9 <•
“And didn’t you _ __
night that you would buckle down to
work?”
“Indeed I did, dear father,” aid the
bright and truthful lad. “I eooldn’t
skate, you know, if I didn’t first buckle
down to work.”
husband, “did you ever see a man run
after a horse-car after he had caught H ?’’
CLEAR WASTE.
“You don’t call on Mias G. now?"
“No, we’ve quit” •
"Quit? What’s the difficulty ?”
“Oh, her father’s too penurious."
“Too penurious? Why, he has the
reputation of being particularly liberal”
“Perhaps he has, but he told me the
other evening I’d better leave, as he
couldn’t afford to waste shoe leather on
me. It’s my private opinion that that
man would skin a flea for its hide and
tallow.”—Oil OUg Blizzard.
mies all around, and while lawyers might
PERFECTLY WILLING. -
As the President sat down Elder Pen
stock rose np. There was a yearning,
anxious expression on his face, and,
after clearing his throat of taoka and
splinters and scrap iron, be said:
“Miwmr Premdeat, in —e dot la
in case you doan’ want ”
“Sit down I” “Fire him out I” "Snatch
him bald-headed I” came from all parts
of tho hall, accompanied by a great clat
ter of feet, and the Elder was forced to
hidehia head.
IcfcTMl
ANOTHHB NAME FOB
Two young ladies, one a resident of . , ., . _ „
Philadelphia and the other of Chicago, Jj^o^/pAta Evening Call.
were walking on Michigan avenue when
the Philadelphia girl remarked :
“It strikes me as quite remarkable
that so many of the houses in this dty
have bay windows attached to them."
“Yes” responded the Chicago' miss;
“we find them very convenient, but we
do not call them bay windows.’’
“No? * What do you call them ?”
“Foot reeeptocles."—-PAtiadetyAto
Call.
them good in the end. —Peek’a lSun.
School was Oat.
“ I hear a great deal -of talk,” said
old Mr. Joblingson, as he drove out into
the country, the other day, in order to
enjoy s sleigh-ride with a friend, “ of
the decay of manners in Americans, and
particularly in American youth. Now
I don’t take much stock in it To be
sure, when I was a boy, I was taught to
say ‘ Sir ’ or ‘ Madam ’ to every man or
woman who spoke to me, and to take
off my hat to every grown person I
might meet on my way to school.
Nowadays the boys are leas formal, per
haps, but are they less truly polite ? I
think not. Look at the crowd outside
the school-house we are just coming to.
Did you ever see a brighter, more re
spectful, quieter set of boys? Gentle
men, every one of them, I make no
doubt." The boys were, indeed, re
markably quiet, and when the old gen
tleman bade them “goodday” as he
and his friend skimmed by, they re
sponded in fitting terms. “ What did I
tell yon?" asked Mr. Joblingson
proudly, as the congregation
passed.
WHY HE WASN’T THSHH NOW.
Kosciusko Mqrphj, who is a book
keeper in a grocery house, met a friend
who clerks in a cigar store on Austin
avenue, and asked him for seigar.
“Ain’t got any," said his friend.
“Ain’t got any?’’ said Kosciusko.
“Why, when I used to work in a cigar
store, I always had my pockets stuffed
with cigars.”
“Yes; probably that’s the reason you
ain’t iu a cigar store now," wal the
mushing reply. ~Tejiaa Sifting*.
PBOUD OF IT.
Borne of the riohest men in Austin
started in life in a modest way, and are
still plain, unpretentious people, but
their sons put on a great deal of style
Cue of the latter, who was better potted
about other people’s affairs than about
hia own family’s, remarked, sneeringly,
to an acquaintance:
“Your father was nothing but a simple
stone mason.”
“I know where you got that informa
tion,’’ quietly remarked the other.
“From whom did I get it?”
“From your father."
“How do you know that?”
“Because your father used to be my
father’s hod carrier.’’—Tfccae Sifting*.
OR THE LOOKOUT.
A young men was standing on <
nut afreet smoking a cigarette and I
ing t^e smoke proudly through
when a gentleman stopped sa
him: • .»
“Will you be kind enough to favor me
with your name .and sddrees f
“And why should I give yoHmy name
aqd addreas ? tyu are a stronger to
me," replied the young man, lighting a
freah cigarette. ~
“You will pleaee pardon the requaa^’*
continued the gentleman; “but I* hi
merely a matter business, I
watched the expert manner in which;
handle oigaiettae, and, being
taker, I would sort o’ like to
•peaking terms with your
family.”— Xfce Call. - MB *
A MOONLISHT EYMFHOHK
Algernon—"My dearest ’ Eadora, you
know that aa we are upon to be married
ws should cease to live in an enchanted
dream and begin to take pracitoal rises
of life.”
Endora—“I know that,
have thought it all over much i
than you think.”
Algernon—“You know that I am not
rich, and eaanot afford to keep my bird
of paradise in a gilded cage.”
Endora—“It mah— no dtiksenet,
Algernon, I have already picked out a
•west little house in the i
I know you cap rent”
Algernon—“How good
angel, and then you know that in
to pay tor the furniture, which must be
bought on Btotidm suto, it wflinot de tn
keep a eerraat. Oan aqr ilaiifogh pretty
white hands make famed aud attoad to
all the other household duties?"
Endora—"Well, no; but I have pro
vided for that, too. Mother’s people
are staving houeekeepere, aud she and
my three maiden aunts wfll give up
boarding and come and live with ue,”—
couldn't no hi.
Two Brooklyn boys found p
Year’seard caee. It'
card case, but the boys at ones quarreled
for its possession. The mailer of the
two, a slim little fellow, with red hair
andoturned-up note, displayed nofen
phenomenal ability in the matter ol
blood-curdling threats and gmonl brag
gadocio that the other boy,Who hade
hoed like * Na«nw*.hsii and a flat tihe
the knotty end ef a club, felt onenpoilad
to give up the quarrel iu dtagraaa. *A
gentleman who waapaming aaked tim
larger boy why he did not take tornttle
his by right of dtoeovery. - ^
“Kin 1 lick 1m!” mid the boy; "la
course 1 kin lick im. IT
SAVINO MONET.
Mrs. B.—“You remember, dear, that
you said laaQfoeok I better attend Oeah
k Oo.’s annual remnant sale m I might
pick up a few little bargains and save
somtitoing."
Mr. B.—“Yes, and I hope you went,
for my busineu te not prospering and we
But at that instant a snow-ball I maat «*ve where we can.”
* v “ * l '“ ** Mrs. B.—“Yea, I went, and you can’t
guess how much.I saved."
Mr. B.—“^bw much ? A dollar ?”
Mrs. B.—“A dollar! I saved ten
dollars!” ~ ~
Mr. B.—“Bleas my stars. What Have
you been doing ?”
. came between the heads of the pair, and,
striking the horse, set him off at a dead
gallop; another knocked off Mr. Job-
lingson’s hat; a dozen hit him and his
friend on their backs at the same instant,
and as long as they were in range they
were soundly peppered, amid the hoots
yells of the “quiet young gentle- j Mrs. B.—“Saving money just as yon
And when the horse
stopped, and Joblingson had picked the
snow out of his ears and neck, he opined
the youth of the present generation
roundly for a pack of roughs and incor
rigible
said. I found a fifty dollar remnant of
•ilk just large enough for two drawee
and by taking K all I saved ton dollars.
The bill will be sent to you to-morrow.
Shall I go again and aavp —“
But Mr. & had fainted.
into bits an’ chew an’ swallow ’tea.’ 1
“Then why do you stand hare?"
“You don’t know that boy,
Wfay.be kin talk Mggern a
and nobody but a deaf boy up <
street dset tackle Urn. I’ve
mote’n cnee, but he scares me
time. Why, he’d Mare the wits
Suliivsn. Lick 1ml
up an’IB show you howl Ua Itofe 1m r
LEAP YEAR UBUtT. f
A touno Chicago man baa applied far
a divorce, alleging that hia wife fomad
him to marry her. This statement, and
the fact that leap year te so near, will
make timid young men feel very Mayum
—Chicago Telegram. ■ « *-
It te understood that the
adopted the following i
leap year: “If you see what «ou wanly
ask for it."—Texa* Sifting*. 7
Fob several yean pari it
customary to* young men to
girl who refuses to many
course the girls will be
ing the tables next year.-
Traveller. .
' The girls have already
plana for leap year. Tb
lover they will say, “Do you Khe
made bread?” If heaaya.
reply will be, “Well, I mn hak» »
■N