Historical Newspapers of South Carolina

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Thera la i a raUat froaathe irt orthahaariaf lh« tovn, tog* loHartecia Through tha 4im narrow walha, with. * Of U» IrOaa, waring orar tha long promenade, And littering llghtl/ tha waya of jov foot With tha gold of tha aanahine of Lookarbia And tha nighta that come down the dark pathway* of dnak With tha star* In their ■' In their and odor* of woran draper!**, apangled with And loopad np with Ulliaa for lorera ta naa Inthaaong* that they aug to the tinkle and Of their awaet aarenadinga through Loekerbit O Lookarbia a treat 1 Ton ar* fair to ba aeen ! Be it noon of tha day, or tha calm and aerene Afternoon, or the night, yon are one to my heart; And I lor* yon abort all the phraaea of art; For no language may frame, and no Up* my My rhyme haunted rapture* o'er Lockerbie -IA/'. A DANGEROUS VIRTUE, f A HUTCH n iAXm PATH. Erery one (parha pa) known tha atory of Praaanoo-of-Mind Tomkyna (of Oriel) who gained bin prmnomen for hammer ing with aa oar the fin gen of the young lady who elug to hie boat, which die would othenriee hare orerset and drowned him; but hia hi not the only instance wherein that admirable rirtue hak been displayed to ita poeneeaor’a diaadrantage. Except, indeed, in the oaee of running away at onee on the first hint of danger (where it is almost im possible to go wrong), I am inclined to doubt whether pteaenoe of mind is a virtue. I hare known ao many oaaea wherein people endowed with this highly eulogised quality hare, in what the French call ‘‘supreme momenta” (Aug- lice "narrow eharee,” "muokera”), done auoh things with sang-froid and on pre mediated good judgment as they have repented of, bnt oonld nerer atone for, all thefrttVea. I onee performed an action of this kind myself, which prored ao far from “presence of mind” being only second In point of adrantage in a railway acci dent to “absence of body,” that hardly anything can ba lees desirable; and as the public trarel a great deal by railway, tbs recital of it may interest them. I was a passenger (me night by the Beotoh express to Edinburg, and as might here been expected frcU'me pos- ■nmlng llla qgnttty to question, had taken ear* to make myself particularly comfortable. Pullman end sleeping cam were unknown in those days, bnt I had secured the seat opposite to me for my feet, end wee ee well fortified against the cold as a late dinner at “the Rag,” with a glass of “sixty year-old” brandy to follow, within, dbd ulster and ruga without, could make me. I hade friend (no, too eospidous reader, not a lady— it was the limited mail train) beside me similarly situated, and in thw third seat beyond was an urbane stranger with his (cgs up, who from his discreet si- lenoc and hie haring secured the seats on the off aide where nobody oould disturb him, I concluded to Ip a diplo mats. Haring awakened at Oarlisle, I got out for another jmN( eerre of brandy (much younger than that I had had at the elub), and on returning to my ear riagefonid, tomy horror, the east for my feet occupied otherwise, by an in truder, and a person too of e class to the form “a rough customer” not burs been inapplicable, me who is any one can under stand my indignation. Even in omni- J Hmaeee, which are licensed to bold a good many people, persons already in possession, however few, resent, I am told, the arrival of new comers; but the ^ present outrage was one that was into!- . erable, and (except on the Continent), absolutely unparalleled. An English men’s house is his castle; but his two seats in a night train are even more sa cred and peculiar to himself. I was a*- t tonished end amaeed to the last degree, but I was not speechless: “lj[y''good air,” I said, “you have mistaken your carriage. ” “No, I ain’t; and I mean to travel in this un.” “But it is my seat, sir.’) - “Then I auppcee you sits on your stfU I felt sorry be parted artfole of yet time (or giving me time to think) I plucked the bag from the reck and flung it violently out, as 1 reckoned, upon tne piastorm; it foil, however, on the line, about ton yards beyond it “Good heavens,” cried I, “he’ll lose it.” “It’s no matter,” said the diplomatist iu the softest and ereamleet tone conceiv able; “it happened to be mi beg.” Ton might have knocked me down with a feather. I made e hundred apolo gies, all of which he acknowledged with great politeness. “It has my address on it, and will turn up some day, no doubt” “How oould I have been such an in fernal fool!” I murmured penitently. “Pardon me,” he said, stUl sweetly smiling; “it is not that you are—the character you have so graphically de scribed, but because you have so much pteaenoe of mind. For mypsnrt I never do anything in e hurry, Mid especially if it seems imperatively demanded of me; I always avoid being what is vulgarly called ‘equal to the situation.’ Atone time, indeed, it was otherwise. I used to suffer from the same infirmity as yourself, but was cured of it, as I am sure you will be, and, as it curiously happens, in a precisely similar manner. “I was coming by mail one night from the north of Scotland; in the carriage with me was bnt one fellow-passenger, e young fellow whom I judged te be in love, since be seemed very much occupied with his own affairs and said little. He did not appear inclined for aleep, and gave me the idee of expectation. Per- My (fiend wee asleep (one’s friends#!- ways are asleep whan we need their se me the i< haps he iml to meet his beloved object at his journey's end. At a small station jnst beyond Perth he got hnrriedly out, as I understood from his muttered ex clamation, for a glass of whisky; it was a bitterly bold winter's night, which seemed an excuse for it; but I warned him that there waa no time to get it, and there was not The carriage door had hardly dosed behind hiq» when the train went oh. “I was very sorry for the poor lad, and knowing that to be left at so wretched a place without one’s luggage would be an additional annoyance. With great presence of mind I threw out~of the window everything he -ponaoesed: his portmanteau, bat box, and railway rug, even to his umbrella. I ean see them noyr, black on the snow-covered line, where he oonld not fail to see them from the platform. Then we thundered on for about twenty miles, when the train stopped again, and who should present himself at the window of the carriage but the young man himself. * “‘I beg your pardon,’he said, ‘for letting the cold air in, but I see it is the wrong compartment I thought I had left my b'ggage here.’ “ ‘ So you did,’ I said; 1 but I chucked it out I’m very aorry, but I thought we had left you behind. I did it all for the best.' "' And you've done it pretty com pletely,’ was his dry reply. “ When we had telegraphed to the last station he got in again and explained matter*. He was studying civil engi neering, it seemed, and had bribed the engine man to fei him drive ns for ft mile or twoi As this was eontrary to regulations, the man was afraid io let him jetn him at Perth, but told him to jump on at the first small station we q§me to, which he aooordingly did. It was a lesson to hhn not to break the oompany’s by-laws, and-to me not to be ao fond ae I used to be of exercising m.\ presence of mind.” After this homily, and my own pre vious experience of what comes of promptness-and presence of mind, the reader will think that I myself—mot q*i voua parle—would at least never fall into a mistake of that kind again. Tet this happened to me only last-week. I had taken a harried lunch at my olnb, before going to Brighton, and, finding It to'be rather' late, had flung myself into the first hansbm et ^be door, with mi impatient J ‘ J Po-Tietorufc M Thr man drove off, but alowly; his horse seemed rired, and after Si fow yards came to a full stop. “ yhat is the matter ?” I exclaimed with some irritation. “7 am the matter,” cried a well-known ▼dee; it was a great friend of mine, who had stopped the eab just to shake hands. Hia quick eye savLlfomething besides myself in ii " Why do yon travel with two umbrellas,” he inquired, '‘likes Japanese gentleman of rank with c couple of swords ?” •. - Then I perceived that the man who had just got out of the hansom at the club had left his umbrella behind him. Of oourte I might have left it where it was, but, with great preaenoe of misd, it struck me that it would be 1 letter to intrust it to my friend (who was bound- for the club) to give it to the porter, for the owner, who would thereby reoovei It was really rather difficult to explain, my real rsasou for returning the artfole by my frfood was that I had doubts oi the cabman’s honesty, but I could not; tall him that. Bo I had to narrate to a w --- - —.—i —; —r —: , eluding a pdioeman, who waa looking at me with great snspfoiou, that I had sent Hia article away by a friend, for the pnrpose of returning it to ita owner. “Oh, that’s a* pretty atory,” cried the cabman (and I felt that it waa ao, ahd would be worth tailing). “Jnst look af ter this party, policeman. ” 1 had never been in such a false posi tion in my life, though, as tha reader^ knows, I-had suffered before from my great presence of mind. “Ton had better go back, my good friend, to the gentleman at the elnb, who will doubtless reward you,” said 1 in a conciliatory tone. Then, suddenly remembering it was this abominable cab man’s own fault all along, I added in a more natural way, “How dare you take a second fare, before you have door, with the first? Don’t you know th< regulations under which you hold youi license?” “But I thought, air, as you ware th< same gentleman”—then I knew (by hii- civility) that I had conquered. “Thought, sir,” I pat in, “it would l> much better far you if you used yout eyes, instead of thinking. The man’s a fool I” And then 1 walked off majeeti oally, having already, as I saw, im pressed the fickle crowd with the Same opinion. ' Bnt I was quite aware, for all that, that the whole affair might have been very unpleasant, and (hat I had - been very nearly getting into a second bobbl* through my too prompt proceedings, and my fatal gift of preaenoe of mind.— Belgravia. 1 l ""~ Impaling Their Victims. ~~ ——" i The Annamese have brought tbe science of impalement to a much finer point than might be inferred from the process heretofore described. A French officer who witnessed an execution in Tonkin, before the recent troubles, gives a very curious account of the ap paratus of impalement *A lofty stake with a sharp point is fixed in the ground, os firmly as a telegraph pole; and with the upper part a chair of iroo, having an orifice in the center of the seat, noon- nected. The point of the stake fits the oriflee in the chair; and the latter in low ered or raised by machinery set in mo tion by a crank—so that several feet of the pole can be forced through 3ie body of any one seated in the chair. There is a lofty platform, rising to the same height as the pole, and reached by a ladder. The executioner compels bis victim to mount and take hia seat in the chair, whereon he ia immovably chained. Then the erank ia turned forty or fifty times—the sfoke being buried further and further into the criminal’s body ut each turn. All this appears unutterly horrible to Europeans; bnt the Orientals are not constituted as we are. They fear ordi nary forma of death vary little ; and de capitation or hanging has as little ter rors fo( them as the workhouse for the common Anglo-Saxon cr m naL More over, their nervons system—especially that of the Chinese and kindred races— is not altogether similar to the nervouy^ system of Aryan races. The French of ficer who witnessed the method of-exe- cution shove described, avers that the criminal continued to eat a banana, un til the operation was half completed; and many travelers concur in bearing evidence that the Ohinese exhibit-nnder torture a degree of fortitude equal, if not superior, to the well-known stoicism of the American Indian. Bnt it is rather strange to learn that part of tbe iron machinery used in the impaling process referred to, bears the trade-mark of u French ironmaster. At fhr Pfaufar -the eouatenanoe of the diplomatist; it fM the sort of difioulty (another man's Wcnlty) that amnaed him. “You may not ba aware, my good I rammed, "that it is usual for was i bsAhemaelvea. ’’ lion cloeeeight to taka two tickets, ’ fion every*; "show me yourn— , iftollee. Ihf the window and ex- J* *** ^‘^'tamional proaepitude. pnontthfc mm"; kfoalems be I toad half a crown of come to un endoadaratood the eihi- femh MohHitLfeflQrioQ, intruder wm beooor slkferiJb exclaiming inserted in the H at once.—I therefore did so, and w itb the consciousness of having performed a good action, and also manifested n<> •light acumen on the spur of the moment, we drove on. - On arriving at Victoria, I tendered the cabman eighteenpenoe. “ What is this for?” he inquired, with an indigna tion which, considering bit actual f ir* waa a shilling, did him, I thought, great credit. “It ift just fifty par cent, above what 1 owe jqp,” I said, “you very impudent fellow.” “Wkntt” ha erfod, in a voice that brought quite a little erowd around ns, “efffati—pinri from the Temple I” “The Temple 1 I earns from the Me gatherium Club, you scoundrel” “Theq that’s not your umbrella,'' b- exfJaimad excitedly, pointing to th» ^rtfola, my own property, which I h I iu my hand. “Mm me,” I afoi-MfceetfoaU-. “hut (boas am ay And 1 held u* lb* baud!* for hfc fampaelfcm. “Ttom whera to tbt uabrafr tfcet wv >r Spriggins took Fogg’s sister to the picnic. . Late in the afternoon they wandered off together, and seated themselves on a moss-oovered stone half way np the hill, from which they oonld enjoy the view below. It was here that Spriggins asked himffifi , ~— - , “Is not this the time for me to seise ? This beantiful stretch of country below us, this cloudless sky above, all nature in holiday attire—doth not all seem to say ‘Avow thy love’ ?” Fogg’s sister sighed. ? “wnat is it?” askedSprigftins, softly. “Though all so beautiful, it suggests the need of something more.” ‘ 'Exactly, ” said Fogg’s sister. ‘ ‘I was thinking— give me this hill iu the middle of March, after one or two thaws that have left it like- glass; then give me a good bob-sled, and as many of you get on as want to, so long as you let me steer —give me this, I say, and, take my word for it, I’d make the ice rattle 1” Spriggins waited. L1TTLB INSIGHT INTO AVOCATION. HOMAN LOT COMPAKBDTO AN A NUT. ■ —A Warifoa •• Vut —*■ [From tha AtJaata (Oa.) OoastitaUoo.] [TMn tha MQwaafeaa Bun.) Most everybody ia dead. That is, ail Not long since, tin editor of the tkm the old folks. There era mighty few •pent an evening with a friend who to a left of the old etook that need to move “government detective,” a men in the' around ao lively and take the leed to employ of the post-office department, j bneineae and public affairs. Some of us and who travel* all over the west at gov- we getting lonesome now. The ranks eminent expense, and who would seem to have an enviable position, one that hundreds of men would be glad to se cure. After talking for an hour on the incidents of hia basin ess, we asked him how lie liked it. He looked long and earnestly at the wall opposite where he sat, choked np a little as some recollec tion came to him, then with a tear in his eye he said: “Well, George, there are tome things about it that are pleasant, bnt there are some that are enough tc break a man’s heart. ' If we oonld shadow fi^g-mhlwTs entirely, men who have no friends, no home associations, there would be a certain romance about it that oould be enjoyed. Bnt suppose'' the bell tolling all about and to see the you have a letter containing money, stolen from the mails. You report it to the postmaster, and a detective is put on. He finds where the letter was probably lost, and has his suspicion of a certain postmaster, or route agent, and that man is shadowed. Decoy letters are sent and the poor fellow takes one that has money in it, money that is marked. Them we have to go for him. Wo have the evi dence bef<u»he is arrested, and his con viction is dead sure, an.-’ very likely he breaks down and confesses the whole thing. The heart-breaking part of the bnsineea is going into a quiet home and taking the husband and father and tear ing him from the wife and children who do not believe that he is guilty, taking him away from them, knowing that he is doomed to a felon’s cell, and that he is disgraced forever. To have tbe-wife of a man who lifts jnst commenced steal ing, beg and pr*y with you to let her husband go, and have her hold up her little baby and ask you, tor the baby’s sake, to release the father, and to feel little children pulling at the skirts of yonr coat, crying and pleading, is enough to make a man who has got children oi his own go out and club himseif. But those who lose money must be protected and a man cannot give up to his feelings thongh many times I have felt like pay- i ig the money out of my own pocket, rather than arrest a man. One of the saddest things I ever did was to take a boy who was clerk in a post-office, at night, around his father's house, to the •barn, where he had concealed a lot of lettere that he had rifled. As we passed the honsa the father and mother of the lioy, who knew nothing of the robbery, were sitting by the firelight singing some good old Methodist hymns, and we could hear them as we dug under the hay in the bam for the letters, with the hoy showing ns where they were. Then we had to go in the house and break the news to the old father and mother. As we walked toward the house the voice of the father was lifted up in prayer, and we stood on the steps with uncovered heads, waiting for him to finish the prayer, and it was the saddest scene I ever witnessed. I had the thieving boy, or young man, by the wrist, and as the father asked God to watch over their only child, and keep him from tempta- •tion, and deliver him from evil, the boy trembled all overhand broke down in a flood of tears, and I was not much more composed than he was. I tried to think of some way to get out erf going in there, but^the boy had papers hi his room that we must have, and there was no other way. It is said that government officials seldom die, and never resign, bat 1 swear to you 1 waa willing to die or re sign, almost, at that moment, when the old gentleman got up from hia knees, after the evening prayer, and went over keep Ailing up, but we don’t know the new recruits. Old Father Time is a con script officer, and he won’t take any sul stitute nor give anybody a bomb-proof place. There are no quartermasters mu commissaries nor pot-ash getters in this war, but it to fight, fight, all the time. Sooner or later all of us have got to go. We can’t desert nor dodge nor play sick nor shodt a finger off, and there are no for loughs and UC pensions and no dis charge. There is not even a promotion for good conduct or noble daring. There is nothing bnt to do and die. Well, it’s all right I know, or it wouldn’t have been so, but it grieves me to hear THE HUMOBODS PAPERS. WMAT WB Ptm LAID SI DB 00’*. -r- Da ole gray «ocaa tear Talkin' dowadalana- Wa’idon laid bytbaoo'a; An* aha waddles in de wtt an' squats ta dt te his deaf old wife and reverently-kissed How te Fat on a Postage Stamp. t——• ''z — The Boston Traveler says:—A man can learn something if he will only look about him.' I was af the Post-office Department the other day and I noticed an employee busy affixing stamps to en velopes. Every time ha moistened the right hand corner of the envelope And then placed the stamp upon it I asked him if there was any advantage in wet ting the envelope instead of the stamp, he said< '"You notice that I moisten the envelope first; wall, I do that be cause it to tha right way, Thera ia a right and a wrong to everything, and con sequently there ia a right-and wrong way to put on postage stamps. It is impoMible to moisten a stamp with the tongue unless a small proportion of tha gqm adheres to it. Now this gum to b? no mesas injurious, hot thin the depart ment does not sdverttoe it as a health food; so the only way left to the tight way, and that is to moistan the envelope After Itoteaiag to hta Msf etate- totatlfalt m though I had emerged from the 4mm AMn of IgniHUHBi Vfoe her, the mother of mypiisoner, oa the forehead,"and then began' to sing, ‘Nearer, my God to Thee.’ I thought of my mother, and of my father, and of my children, and’if the hoy had skipped ont I don’t know whether I would have had strength to catch him or not, but he never oould have escaped. I will not dwell npon the'soene in that hoose. .It haunts me like s nightmare, and I never see a good old father or mother without wondering if they have not got a boy that is going wrong. Well, George, whatever yon do, don’t be a government detective,” and the officer got up and walked away with his handkerohief to his eyes. n ** If every boy in the land who has be gun to develop symptoms of speed, afid who is taking the first steps toward be coming a thief, oould have that picture presented to him as the detective pre sented it, and had the boy any heart left in him, or any sense, he wvmld think of the old folks or somebody- who will be heart-broken at his fall, ahd change his uieb this article with any- oouree so Don’t thing funny, because it is far from ii A “ Massy ” Policeman. Qua DeSmitb, while plodding hia homeward way to his boarding house at or about two o’clock ip the morning,'dis- oovered a man, fast asleep, sitting on tbe doorstep of a dosed salooe. - “Are you a policeman ?” asked Gns, punching him familiarly in the stomach with his cane. “Of course I am,” replied the slum berer, nibbing hta eyea. “Are you on duty T' ^ "Why, of course, I am on duty.” “Rut you were asfoap.” . _ “No, I wasn't asleep. I waft just pre tending to be asleep.” • - - “What for?” ; * “Nothing to particular, only I think it to my duty to pretend to be asleep, as • kind of hiat to three soatoig galoots that (bay to hi at ha* to bed in- ataod of bqHwtog about the streets of Austin aipt«VelooklB tfcf Wfutof.”- old stock passing away. Thirty-two years ago I moved to Borne, Ga., and it waa a right smart town of 3,000 people. ’ They are not there now. What are left I ean count onmy fingers, hardly a dozen of the old settlers, and they ' move abont very slow. OKI Mother White died the other day^ The oldest of them all—She waa always go ing about doing good or trying to. She outlived her old “Mann” the Scotch man, and she outlived her children, bnt she never surrendered to grief or trouble. There old Sootoh people have hab its and principles like cast-iron. 1 hey never change. The old “Mann,” as we called him, waa always merry, and always at work making harness, and he died in harness. He had hia time to eat and to sleep and to pray and to sing and he bible, and Ids time to work, and he never neglected the regular pro gramme. 1 Old Mftun White couldn’t sing, but lu thought he Could, and he considered ir 1 as much a duty as to pray. He was al ways in k&rftesf at the church. He was *a heavy man, bnt he waddled up tbe bill to tiie meeting-house with alacrity, and took his seat like hq meant business. He said amen and amen all through the the prrecher’s prayer and then he opened his hymn-book with eagerness and stood upright in front of the choir and sang from away down. He tried to follow, t'lit was sure to get a little ahead, for be enjoyed it and wanted to do more than his share. The choir did their best to smother him, ikt they couldn’t. His bellows was strong and blew loud. His 1 kind of singing wouldn't have been tol erated from any other man, for he was always a little up or a little down, and he tapered off * His voice was a good deal below bass, and came up like there was a cogwheel in his throat But everybody that knew tbe old man en joyed his singing, for it seemed to do h'm ixi much good, and at times when the words were very tender the old maa would say “amen” at the end of the stanza. I remember that one time when Henry Gftrtell and George Stovall were leading music the old man turned two leaves in his hymn-book and got from long into short meter, and the words didn't fit the music. There wasn’t enough'Of them, ^ind the old Maun sliook his head and gave a grant and filled ont %itk a couple of omens. s He heard a titter behind him, and, looking round, muttered audibly, “Thar’s sum- thin’ wrong abonic here.” We 'joked him abont it next lay, and he langhed aa he miff* z—; j- 1 — “Ah, well, yon know that David said sing onto the Lord a new song, and I deed it Yea, I deed it” v I wonder now many children old Mother White has taught _ in' Bandas School. She has had a class of little ones ever since I knew her, and sh< taught them all the same thing, to lovr God and tell the troth and do right. 1 don’t think she ever improved on that— she didn’t know anything about the science of religion or the evidences o! Christianity, and she didn’t want to know.— It was enough for her that she loved her Maker, and loved everybody, and her Maker loved her. Her faith waa if on-clad; she lived in it, and she died in it If I oould trade in chances for heaven, 1 wonld be willing to trade for hers. She ia there, I reckon, and some of the children she tanght are there, tbfe, and they gave the old lady a welcome that was heaven enough for her. Wa’s don laid by da oo’n. Da ol* aow root* war da tatara waa dag— Wa’a don laid by da eo’n; ^ An' da domtaicker baa aaa a-ohaa’a* o*> bog— We’adnn laid by da oo’a, - Da ok com bawl* bar calf aba call*, An’ da ’poaram log wag* hia taU; I goea widmy pipe Whar da apple* ia ripe, An chocka ’em inter da pail De ok yelkr boon’ am troubled wid fleas— Ws’a don laid by de co'o; An’ it’a too late now for robbin’ ob bee*— Ve’a don laid by de oo’a. De ole bell *beep ain’t a fee red ob de cor*— We’idon laid by da co’n; For bar old gray back’* all kivarad wid bnrt- Va’a don laid by de oo’n. De lark be cries A* he raiaes an' flies, An’ de white boy ahoots wid hi* gun; Bnt de bird* keep on ™ ' O’er de top* ob da co’n, U«ae de boy be neker touch on*. —ArboHiuvi) Trntellvr. At THAT SBTHiMD IT. A corpulent old German who has been doing a thriving business in a little town in Indiana, suddenly refused to pay bis debts. The commercial trav elers who sold him goods, have payed him frequent visits in fruitless attempts to cqjlect money due their firms. The other day a long-legged dhde, represent ing a Cincinnati dry goods house, walked into the establishment presided over ity the erratic merchant, and presented a statement amounting to $538. “Ich got no money,” said the German as he balanced his abdomen on a eheese ■V box. “The devil yon haven’t 1” roared a presumptuous collector, slamming his valise down on a cracker liafrfel. "No monkey business abont this thing! This is the #1$ £roe I here for iliat bill, and now I propose to have it 1” “Yel, meiu frent,” replied the mer chant, a little disconcerted, “Ich dou’l know how you vil git him - .” The drummer drew himself up to hie full height, and, assuming tbe air of a prize fighter, leaned over the-eounter and whispered at tbe top of his voice: “Say 1 Do you know that I killed a Dutchman once?” “Och ! So ? Dot ist ynst der reason vy leh left Shermanny mein aelf al- > readt,” retorted the old teuton, as he a jgerehed for a convenient ax handle. ^ drummer paid a small boy half o dollar to go back and rescue his valise. SHU WILL LAHD HUB FISH. ' i Clara -Belle, writing from Long Branch to the Cincinnati Enquirer, says: “Daring the past hour I have been interestingly watching an elicit girl. I call her that because all of ber efforts are directed to eliciting a proposal of marriage. She has been promenading the hotel corridor with the object of her elicitude. He is ft sappy young man, with a million, and I think likely she’ll fetch him. If he had an ounce of good brain in his poor bead he would have seen that she is disingenuous; that her mobile fafe waft put through a aeries of carefully studied motions, too pretty to bast lbssohs nr *** ABT or fwahcb. “Fsthsr,” be said, as the old gentie- man looked up, *‘ joa are the of a silver mitong oompfluy, afid ean tell me what an aast—witi H.” *' Yes, my son. We are just now read out an assessment of twtity per cent. It means that everyone owning shares in the company most pay twenty cento on every dollar.” . . “Oh, that’s it? And now what’s a dividend F’ ■■ ,*‘A dividend is the sharing of a profit with the stockholders. That to, when the offioers of the company so far forget themselves as to have more cash on band than they know what to do with it is di- rid d np. There isn’t much use in your remembering the word and its interpre- ‘ totion.” ^ 1 ’ ' - “Bnt I must remember what assess ment means ? ’ “Certainly—never forget that. When assessments fail the country fails. One dividend of three per cent, will excuse five assessments for ten per cent. Now ran out to play.”— Wall Street Aeu’i. NEVER LOST BUT THHBB. He was a weatber-bcalen old salt, and he sat in his boat holding on- to a rope and looking dowli into the water with an expression of mild intelligence. Pres ently a benign old gentleman with pat ent leather pumps on wandered down the pi i and gazed intently at the son of Neptune. „ t “Do you think it's goin to rain'cap tain?” “Wall, it may rain, and then again it may not” i i “Where do you'live ?”, “In that house there by the beach.” “Have you children ?” ■» “All I want.'” “I should think you would be afraid to lire ao near the water, yonr children might get drowned.” “Oh, no; never lost but three that way,” and he pulled up his trap with a click and rowed away, leaving the gen tleman on the pier to philosophise on the depravity of human nature. Is several female colleges in Iowa the girls are taught how to cook. It will come quite handy for them ii, after marriage, they get anything to cook. The Lumber Fields. be termed contortions, bnt as insincere as the grimaces of an actress. I coukhr ;ilct8 see that she was hanging on his arm with that happy medium elasp between the hug of a sweetheart and the coy touch oi a jnst-introduced maiden.- And het [ way of gazing raptly into his face when ' he’said something was calculated to oon- / vince Him that his idiocy was entrancing. Oh, I oould understand the exact nature ' and stage of her undertaking quite as well as though I had heard every word that they uttered, She was e perfect specimen of the bdgus ‘May I?’ girl— all yielding and abnegative in manner. Just let him marry her, that’s all! I happen to hftve beard her bully her rftther and thrash her brother in the next eoona-to-BaJaer^——•—=£•■ • PLANTATION PHILOSOPHY. Truth to stranger den fiction The present size and swift growth of the lumber industry of Michigan, says a local correspondent, as shown by statis tics, are almost startling. Twentyyears ago a few hundred millions of feet of luml>er were cut in the State; now "the innnal product is one-quarter that of the ▼hole country, and reaches more than 'our billion feet. Cut in Iw.irds, twelve inches wide and qne inch thick, the • early product would reach 800,000 miles ind would suffice for a double-boarded fence, with posts, sixteen times around tbe earth. It would build houses for a •ity of 100,000 inhnlntants, and wonld i*ach year load some two thousand five hundred miles of railroad cars. Those vho, _were far-sighted enough to buy Michigan lumber Ends a quarter-century igo at a little more than the government (rice of $1.55 an acre, have already made' colossal fortunes out of tracts vhich sell readily now at from $15 to $30 m acre. ' Nevertheless, the business ias ita ups and downs, and is partien- arly down when a great forest fire ft seeps »ver a lumlier region. In that event, ' unless the trees are cut within a year, a worm penetrates tyie timber, spoiling it in a few months. One of the curious in this connection'to the almost immediate appearance in millions of the moth that produces the worm oa a burned tract of perhaps 10,000 acres, where before not a moth of the species ras visible. Equally surprising ia the circumstances lint after the pine has been cut away on u immense tract there spring np all ver it poplar trees, where before not i sign of the poplar oould be seen—the. ■cods ofthe new growth, no doubt, a distance through <( A Good Enough Morgan.” Thurlow Weed devotes several chap ters of his autobiography to the story of the abduction of William Morgan, but the most of this has been already printed. In regard to the campaign cry “A good enough Morgan until after the electicm,” Mr. Weed says:—“While talking with Ebenezer Griffin, Esq., one of the conn- sel of the ‘kidnappers,’ who was going to Batavia to conduct the examination, observed, laughingly to me. ‘After we prove that the body-found at Oak Or chard to that of Timothy Monroe, what will you do for a Morgan ?’ I replied in tbe same spirit, 'That to a good enough Morgan for ns until you ean bring back the one you carried off. ’ On the follow ing day • paragraph appeared in the Rochester DaUu AdverUeer saying that in a conversation I had boasted that tbe body referred to, whatever might be proven to the eontrary, was ‘a good enough Morgan until after the elec tion.’” As the only mfth who knew more about this affair than Mr. Wood died before he did, “no evidence of tile fete of William Morgan more direct or reliable than that which, with an earnest desire to vouchsafe the exact truth, 1 now record will ever be obtalaed. ” , < an e mighty heap scarcer. , De odycation ob a man ie-hto ” bnt his common sense is his gold. Tears ain't a sho' sign ob a tender heart, fur anger sometimes draws de tears from a man when sorrow wonld fail. Fortune sometimes comes ter deone what least expeeks 1), but it is more apt ter come ter de man what works for it. . De wnat l>oy don’t sl’ers torn out ter be de bes’ man. I has knowd good .boys ter drag along- an’ finally amount ter sathin’. . Yer kaint alien jedge ob a man by hia pnblio walk. It’s sometimes de nicest steppin’man dat runs down de heel ob de shoe. De ’omen what to de wost ’boat ran- nin’ 'roan de neighborhood tollin' tales is de. one what complains de loudrs’ when Mint to aatt to keep rata-and mfoo out of the house. H a felkrw owned ft mint , he oouldeeeily “keep the wbUfttw the doofjt’ i( somebody talks about her. Dewust lick I eber * got was from • man what didn’t want ter hit me. Now Fre mighty keref ul ’bout crowdin’ e man. When e pusson says dot he wants ter fight, yer’s safe; but when he tells yer dat he doan’ want ter fight, den stop right whar yer to. SOLID. A Massachusetts book agent, who was wearing a small circular pieoe of court- plaster qd hii face, removed it while shaving a few mornings since, and re placed it when hto toilet wae complete. Contrary to hto usual experience, as he went about hit bttsinees daring tbe rest of the day he wae everywhere received with smiles, which grew breeder and boarder, until at Ua’. somebody langhed in hto face. Led by this to look in the glam, he was somewhat* token aback to discover that, instead of the court plaeter, he had gSxed to hto fam a little round printed label, which had fallen from tire beck Of a new mantle dock purchased the day before, and whfok bore the ap propriate inscription, “TTilTiitll mli! •—i- the air and finding fertile lodgment on • he uncovered soil. The value of the umber, when marketed, may be judged rom the fact that an ordinary pine uakes some 2,000 feet of ent boards, worth at the mills say $40; while the . biggest pines produce 5,000 feet, worth $100. As showing the size to which the sometimes attains, “tire itnn-— bennen here tell of a sound tree in nothfrn Michigan, eleven feet in diame ter at the ground. The owner of this ‘ splendid shaft has already refosed $100 . for sixteen linear feet of the butt which . was sought for exhibition. Bnt, unhap pily, all these evidences of Michigan’s vast wealth in lumber are only tbe sig nals of the end. Some ten years more, at the present rale of denudation, will exhaust the grand pine forests of the State, and, unless the cutting of harder woods, cedars, maple, and elm, succeeds, large amounts of invested capital must seek new fields. A Vermont CBttTsharp Trick. The Island Pond (Vt.) Herald says; Some time since the dogs of this village which, to escape them, ran nnder a barn. There was situated beneath that barn an old well in which was from one to four feet of water, t There was an open space so that the cat oould go, anywhere nnder the barn, but when a dog followed her nnder it, it being dark, she adopted the plan to run and jump directly over the well The dog, not noticing it, would “land” in the water. This practice ahe pursued until she had jumped some half- dozen dogs into the bottom of the well Whether there was any design on her part in this mode of procedure, or .whether she wae interested in the soap business carried on by the owner of the bern, no one bnt the pat knows. Thto may aeem to be a joke, but the foregoing facts ean be proved by several respect able witnesses. “How is rr thereTs so much sickness in the village?” aektd the city gueet. “Fbot to,” replied the landlord, “we havan’t any Board of Nealth hem.” “Bo I perosive, ” aaid the city guest, playing abstractedly with hto fried steak.-Joy. ton Tnxntcript, rr": T - * r v — J ' .■ . n c